Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

KimG143 · KimG143

I attended my first al anon meeting this week. After almost 10 years of marriage and feeling so lonely that I thought it wouldn't hurt to try. My husband drank when we first started dating but I thought it was part of a partying period I saw most of my male friends go through. I knew the drinking would...

omajoy · omajoy

Re-joining this site has once again confirmed for me that as a parent of an A with intense family problems, there is no where to really turn. This site and the posts are 99% about spouses, girlfriends, ex-spouses, ex-girlfriends. I am desperate to interact with parents of A's. Mostly on this site the...

goddess · goddess

I've been dating a recovering alcoholic (14 mo. sober) for three months and the relationship just ended today. I know his program is the most important thing right now, yet does it give him the right to be totally self-absorbed, to not ask about me and my life? I have tried to discuss some basic emotiona...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Hello family, I know it has been a long time since I posted last, but I have been doing ok. HOWEVER....... today is a sad day for me. I got a phone call from my ex-A yesterday, to tell me that his sweet mother, Lucille, passed away Monday in her sleep due to a massive stroke. She was very special to me, and eve...

cen616 · cen616

Hi, all, I've been lurking on this board for close to three months and thought it was about time I said "hello". I've felt an inclination to post on other topics here-and-there, but felt it might be rude not to properly introduce myself first... Unlike many of you, I have only had very recen...

babysteps · babysteps

My AH blew 34.8 days of meetings and sobriety a week and a half ago. Prior to this recent bout with lucidity (his most since rehab over 2 years ago) I made a commitment to myself not to intervene by telling him how his behavior was affecting me because it never seemed to ultimately help things. Well now he i...

Loupiness · Loupiness

The ideas of detachment and "hitting bottom" are really great in theory, but what seems to be forgotten is that the a almsot always does not go down alone. It's my life too! This past Feb we staged an intervention and sent ah to rehab for alcohol, prescription drug(s )use, and an addictiv...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Hello, I think that I forgot to mention a couple of things that may mean the difference between me going to this funeral or not. Yesterday I got hurt at home and hit my head. I did not go to the hospital because basically I am very stubborn. I may not even be able to go out to take care of my bills/errands and s...

NANUKE · NANUKE

Hi Alanon Family, What a way to start each day!! Stay positive and cherish your serenity!! Would we allow another person to haphazardously withdraw our savings from our CHERISHED bank account? It would be called cheating/stealing!! Why do we allow others to steal our serenity and sanity? Wor...

ragingchild · ragingchild

Behind these eyes lie deep dark wells, wells of emotional no one knows of, deep dark emotions stir, "give them not away" I say, "let no one see the deeper side of me". Behind my eyes lies pain and heartache, fear, rejection lie in wait, waiting for the right moment, to bust the wall...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))))))) Feeling horrible this week. Why oh why, can I not learn from a mistake, without going and doing it again.??? I got out of a relationship with the A. He didn't deserve me, and looking back I now see just how selfish, and out for himself he was. So, I tried ag...

maresie2 · maresie2

For me its now not if but when the A is going to go to jail. I hung on and hung on and hung on to try to retrieve something from the huge mess he's made of every single thing in the last year. He continues to act out and continues really to display impetuous, crazy, self absorbed behavior. There were some good o...

Destynee · Destynee

My husband is an alcoholic. It's tearing us apart. I have a 7 month old daughter that he watches 2 days a week so we don't have to send her to daycare. Last Friday he was found passed out on the sofa while she was screaming in her crib. I told him I no longer feel safe with him watching her. He gives me every e...

ragingchild · ragingchild

I haven't been here in ages but I hope ya'll can help. I went to a get together at a friends house and I knew before we went there would be drinking which was fine. I told them as long as nothing got violent or rough I would be ok, but if it did get out of hand I was going to leave right there and then. Nothing ha...

DT1221 · DT1221

I read this somehwere and had to share it. It is so beautiful to say to the girl or woman in your life or even yourself. i think i am going to frame it and read it each day. If I had a little girl, I would tell her all the things I think she would need to know to be fully prepared for life. I would tell her that there w...

maresie2 · maresie2

I have felt somewhat regrouped today after a horrible week last week and feeling incredibly stressed out about what the A may do. Of course there always has been issues about what he may do. He's done them all, crashed and destroyed the truck, got court cases, been penniless, annoyed and irritated and...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I've been working my tail off going to f2f meetings, here online, personal counseling and a spiritual marriage class. One day I feel fine, that I will be okay not matter what, and then one little encounter can send me spinning. Somehow I'm thinking that there are many of you that can relate... So, this...

QOD · QOD

My AH came over last night. The kids and I were talking w/some folks after karate class when he called my cell phone. I started to not answer it, which surprised me. I have never been inclined to dodge him before. Anyway, I did answer it and he said he wanted to come over and see us. So I had to end my con...

Becky1 · Becky1

Haven't had much time to be here, busy getting ready for new granddaughter due in Dec. Took a hospital tour with my daughter and her hubby last night. I can't believe I'm going to be a REAL gramma! I am also gearing up for my Keith Urban concert, Nov. 1. I LOVE KEITH URBAN. He was involved in an accident...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Well, today is the day. It's prison release time. I am dreading the ringing of the phone. Also I'm home today with a sick kid! Sunday we are leaving for Orlando for a week I'm going to focus on the positive and stay busy today and try not to think about my invading thoughts of impending doom! He doesn'...

UU_Diana · UU_Diana

I am a grateful member of the Alanon Family Group. Since, I discovered MIP, I have had a reliable and safe place to air my concerns and a place to learn from others. I recently made a choice and asked my significant other to leave. After much, much turmoil that involved the usual A behaviors (i.e. lyin...

QOD · QOD

My AH came over on Friday after work. I was extremely upset b/c our 14yo son got into trouble again at school. The Friday before he got busted for leaving school after lunch and skipping his last 2 classes. This past Friday he got into trouble for having multiple verbal altercations w/a group of 9th g...

rtexas · rtexas

((((((((((Everyone)))))))))) I was pondering something today. If you could flip a switch and everyone you know... have history with, problems with... or even everyone you have ever known... just disapeared, how would you be? This is my stupid question, so I get to make up my own rules... and the o...

omajoy · omajoy

Here I am back registered once more after many months absence. I cancelled my membership, but have continued to check back in over the months. Many of the familiar names still post; many I used to see are gone. Without explaining my departure, may I just say that I need a forum. My story is a son who is an A...

serendipity · serendipity

I had to call my mother for money today. I am overdrawn, again and no hope of getting any money from the ex. Still no hard copy of divorce so child support will not do anything till they get that. Fine, even when they get it I doubt I will ever see a dime. Whatever. My mother. She says ok about the money. I say t...

hudsond · hudsond

I have been having some kind of breakdown lately!! Call it emotional, mental, hormonal--who really knows, but Friday I about fell to pieces! I left work sick--stomachache, headache, couldn't stop crying--just feeling awful!!!! So I headed to town, to drown away my sorrows and stress with a sho...

maresie2 · maresie2

The A has sold the truck and bought some clunker. He plans to move several states away. He is still living in the trailer and the people there are going nuts trying to get him to move out. This is the second time he's done that in 6 months stuck around when people want him to move out. I don't know what he is sti...

Lookingforpeace · Lookingforpeace

So I have to say that the past three days have been a total rollercoaster for me. I am not properly detatching...I can see that my emotions are still so plainly affected by my husband's behavior. Not matter how hard I try it seems to cloud my mind. There was a point, I don't even remember when that I read...

rebjohn · rebjohn

my son has alot of issues right now-- cant keep a job - lost his car- cant follow house rules-.drinks and some drugs- my husband his stepdad of 20yrs. does not want him here anymore. has kicked him out several times- after 2-3 weeks i let him back in and the crap starts again. - its like is the problem the h...

Denoraphy · Denoraphy

Living with an active A can be a challenge and I feel like I am a strong enough person that I can let most of what he says roll off of me and not let it bother me. Especially since I have been involved with alanon and have learned about boundries and about typical A behaviors. But.....the biggest challen...

maresie2 · maresie2

The A is trying to get a write off on the truck and get a check. He has a court case coming up and wans to skip town. So he has not only destroyed the truck (which I don't know where it is) he has also sold it out from under me for an unknown sum. He plans to move several states away in order to not be imprisoned. ...

ddub · ddub

sad and unsettled........ tired of myself fighting depression and all like to write things down to get them out of my head. sometimes then I can figgure it out and if I can't, some of you can usually help me. At home I can keep busy, at motel I was restless, claustrophobic and slept to calm my panic. woke...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

Ever since ah came last weekend and came clean about drinking again I have been having nightmares and I wake up at 3 or 4 in the morning dreaming about him drinking. I can't get back to sleep. I feel sick to my stomach, restless and just feel this enevitable doom. I already take meds for anxiety and depress...

Carole08 · Carole08

Hello, I am new to this forum and I guess I kinda need to know the do's and don'ts firstly. Also would like to share with you some recent events . So here goes, my brother in law (husbands brother) is an alcoholic. His entire family and to a certain degree my husband and I are struggling with this. I g...

marmare · marmare

So the cycle again and again.....the controled drinking, the binging, the broken promises, it's started all over again. Sad to think I had started to believe by not only his words but by his actions. I was headed out in October to buy my Harley. Not now, it is safer to tuck the money away into CD's. Un...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello (((All))), The question why is just one that I keep asking, when it comes out I know in my heart that there is no answer. Things happen for a reason, anger builds up, sorrow has comsumed me. These things I can control, I can ask myself why am I letting it all get the best of me. Then I look at my kids a...

beaulahg · beaulahg

JUST FOR TODAY............... I am tired of myself. I go to face to face meeings, I work the step, practice the traditions, attend open meetings, go to AA round ups, Alanon assemblies, district meetings, and, read Alanon material daily. I even joined the local gym. [keep the focus on myself] I kn...

Maria123 · Maria123

------------------------------------------------------------------------He...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I guess the real dilemma for me in my situation is trying to decide what exactly IS the right thing for the kids??? Especially the boy... Here are the choices in my mind: One, you have a dad, he's in and out of your life, when he does see you he loves you and plays with you and is not abusive but it's infrequen...

debilyn · debilyn

How are things Friend? Are ya still having panicy feelings? Please let us know how you are. love,debilyn

Lookingforpeace · Lookingforpeace

Hello All - This is my first time posting on this site. I have been struggling with an "A", as you call it, for about two years now. The part that kills me is that we had 8 GREAT years together before this all happened. Anyway, I am getting to the point in our relationship where I feel that I am a...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((Yo Roomies)))))))))))))) You all know I had opened a face to face group a few months ago (5 months already). Well It started off really good, got about 6 or 7 every week. I had not been commiting for the last few weeks. The members took a "Group decision" and were going to take...

bev · bev

hi everyone,it has been awhile since i posted here..but i really could use some prayers today...found out on monday that my daughter and her husband might lose my grandchildren today.they have to go to the department of social services today at 10,to see what is going to happen..i have been a wreck al...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

My dad had his 20th back surgery on Monday. On wednesday he called and said "I know you've been so busy, and I know you've been extremely worried about me, so I'm calling to tell you that I'm fine, the surgery went well, and that I will be home a week from Saturday..." As I was listening to the ar...

kissers · kissers

Hi everyone, I was thinking about the time my friend's brother and his fiancee were in a horrible car accident. They were both flown to shock trauma. Her brother's injuries resulted in paralysis and her sister-in-law suffered from a broken arm. She called me after the accident happened and was angry...

ally · ally

(((((((((((Guy))))))))))) Was surfing and came across some quotes::::: Anna Quindlen: It's important to remember that feminism is no longer a group of organizations or leaders. It's the expectations that parents have for their daughters, and their sons, too. It's the way we talk about and treat...

maresie2 · maresie2

Pepi my dog was found at the pound She was a few blocks away but she must have been moving all the time for the whole 24 plus hours she was gone. I searched high and low for her. I didn't sleep for two days. She is absolutely fine and chomping on a bone at home Thanks for all your prayers it meant a great deal to...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I thought this needed it's own string, feel free to add! OK I'm gonna give this a shot: Ease in making everyday decisions Assumes responsibility for own actions and life Not afraid to speak up for self or disagree with others Initiating projects and finishing what you start Nurtures self by self care a...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family)))))))))), In reference to Becky's post about Keith Urban and Diva going ga-ga over Johnny Depp. Allow me to set the record straight. While I might go a bit nuts at a football game: GO USC, GO EAGLES, I assure you I would never get crazy. (Just don't talk to my friends Joanne & Kath...

bigh · bigh

I have a question about the rules for a group conscious meeting. when you have one and then have the vote does majority rule. that is my question> thanks bigh

summergrl83 · summergrl83

I don't know how to cut ties with my boyfriend. I don't even necessarily want to never speak with him again, but I WOULD like him to move out. I've gotten to the point where he and his drinking just annoy me to death and if he does stay it is going to get worse until I have some kind of blow up and say really mean t...

Cheryl28659 · Cheryl28659

The addict is in complete control of the group. Like a magician they make everyone look over here and pull the trick off over there. The group is entertained and happy. But I see all the slight of hand. I hear the hallow ring in every promise uttered from the addicts lips. I am not happy or entertained. I am...

kissers · kissers

I haven't spoken to my father in a year. He is very disrespectful to me in front of my daughter and can go into rages. I severed the relationship and have no desire to have a relationship with him. He also participates in cat calls while I am in his presence. I always denied how I felt when around him. Recent...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Dependent Personality Disorder Symptoms This personality disorder is characterized by a long-standing need for the person to be taken care of and a fear of being abandoned or separated from important individuals in his or her life. This pervasive fear leads to "clinging behavior" and...

marmare · marmare

As most of you know I lost my mom last year and I just wanted to share with you the following....(Art is Dad, Helen is Mom) 50 years ago this year, Art and Helen started looking for a house. Art wanted to get Helen and thier three children (I wasn't even thought of yet LOL) settled into a home before he depl...

nmike · nmike

Hi Alanoners, It happens time and time again. Late this summer after my surgeries and having my AHsober tell me he didn't feel anything compassion for me, I said enough is enough. I am not going to make an effort to talk to him, cooperate, or call him about our sons. So of course he shows up for a tournamen...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((Yo Roomies)))))))))))) I have been having a "pure dead crappy week". My life sucks, I am hopeless, useless, a cody, a pain in the ass, and I'm writing this right now, listening to a song, and laughing...lol Well,...

jonibaloni21 · jonibaloni21

Help! I had a harddrive breakdown and now I can't get on in the chatroom! My ex-bf's nephew was very nice in that he completely rewrote my bios(which of course I don't understand) and when I try to get into the room it says it wants to add "ActiveX" to my computer, then when I try to allow it to it s...

CAM0914 · CAM0914

i'm starting to see the chaos that was my life on a whole new level. I hope, dear god, i hope i never become that person again. it was pain, on top of more pain, etc. i had no tools to cope...i drank. i'm here now, one year later, feeling great in my sobriety. it works if you work it. and yes, i'm worth it. ...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

have you ever felt like you were trying to solve a puzzle but you didn't quite have all the information? Well, that's how I have been feeling. It has even led to panic attacks. The answer to the puzzle is I need to have more faith in myself. I need to have confidence in me and my own abilities. So, if I alread...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	New, confused and afraid (Preview) I attended my first al anon meeting this week. After almost 10 years of marriage and feeling so lonely that I thought it wouldn't hurt to try. My husband drank when we first started dating but I thought it was part of a partying period I saw most of my male friends go through. I knew the drinking would...	KimG143	7	637	Oct 5, 2007 by Lily550
	relationship factors in A (Preview) Re-joining this site has once again confirmed for me that as a parent of an A with intense family problems, there is no where to really turn. This site and the posts are 99% about spouses, girlfriends, ex-spouses, ex-girlfriends. I am desperate to interact with parents of A's. Mostly on this site the...	omajoy	9	725	Oct 5, 2007 by Jerry F
	Dating a Recovering Alcoholic (Preview) I've been dating a recovering alcoholic (14 mo. sober) for three months and the relationship just ended today. I know his program is the most important thing right now, yet does it give him the right to be totally self-absorbed, to not ask about me and my life? I have tried to discuss some basic emotiona...	goddess	7	1877	Oct 5, 2007 by Jerry F
	My ex-A 's mother died ESH requested (Preview) Hello family, I know it has been a long time since I posted last, but I have been doing ok. HOWEVER....... today is a sad day for me. I got a phone call from my ex-A yesterday, to tell me that his sweet mother, Lucille, passed away Monday in her sleep due to a massive stroke. She was very special to me, and eve...	hippietrippiechick	4	782	Oct 4, 2007 by Jerry F
	Introducing myself (Preview) Hi, all, I've been lurking on this board for close to three months and thought it was about time I said "hello". I've felt an inclination to post on other topics here-and-there, but felt it might be rude not to properly introduce myself first... Unlike many of you, I have only had very recen...	cen616	5	858	Oct 4, 2007 by abbyal
	Need Reassurance Please! (Preview) My AH blew 34.8 days of meetings and sobriety a week and a half ago. Prior to this recent bout with lucidity (his most since rehab over 2 years ago) I made a commitment to myself not to intervene by telling him how his behavior was affecting me because it never seemed to ultimately help things. Well now he i...	babysteps	4	631	Oct 4, 2007 by QOD
	but it's MY LIFE too :-( (Preview) The ideas of detachment and "hitting bottom" are really great in theory, but what seems to be forgotten is that the a almsot always does not go down alone. It's my life too! This past Feb we staged an intervention and sent ah to rehab for alcohol, prescription drug(s )use, and an addictiv...	Loupiness	10	674	Oct 4, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	update on my ex-A's mom's funeral -- ESH please (Preview) Hello, I think that I forgot to mention a couple of things that may mean the difference between me going to this funeral or not. Yesterday I got hurt at home and hit my head. I did not go to the hospital because basically I am very stubborn. I may not even be able to go out to take care of my bills/errands and s...	hippietrippiechick	2	362	Oct 4, 2007 by Friendofyours
	ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE: YOUR CALL OR COLLAPSE (Preview) Hi Alanon Family, What a way to start each day!! Stay positive and cherish your serenity!! Would we allow another person to haphazardously withdraw our savings from our CHERISHED bank account? It would be called cheating/stealing!! Why do we allow others to steal our serenity and sanity? Wor...	NANUKE	0	362	Oct 4, 2007 by NANUKE
	A poem... (Preview) Behind these eyes lie deep dark wells, wells of emotional no one knows of, deep dark emotions stir, "give them not away" I say, "let no one see the deeper side of me". Behind my eyes lies pain and heartache, fear, rejection lie in wait, waiting for the right moment, to bust the wall...	ragingchild	1	379	Oct 4, 2007 by nmike
	FEELING HORRIBLE AGAIN!!!!! (Preview) (((((((((((((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))))))) Feeling horrible this week. Why oh why, can I not learn from a mistake, without going and doing it again.??? I got out of a relationship with the A. He didn't deserve me, and looking back I now see just how selfish, and out for himself he was. So, I tried ag...	ally	8	765	Oct 4, 2007 by ddub
	regrouping (Preview) For me its now not if but when the A is going to go to jail. I hung on and hung on and hung on to try to retrieve something from the huge mess he's made of every single thing in the last year. He continues to act out and continues really to display impetuous, crazy, self absorbed behavior. There were some good o...	maresie2	4	481	Oct 3, 2007 by Christy
	New Here (Preview) My husband is an alcoholic. It's tearing us apart. I have a 7 month old daughter that he watches 2 days a week so we don't have to send her to daycare. Last Friday he was found passed out on the sofa while she was screaming in her crib. I told him I no longer feel safe with him watching her. He gives me every e...	Destynee	7	539	Oct 3, 2007 by wp
	Question (Preview) I haven't been here in ages but I hope ya'll can help. I went to a get together at a friends house and I knew before we went there would be drinking which was fine. I told them as long as nothing got violent or rough I would be ok, but if it did get out of hand I was going to leave right there and then. Nothing ha...	ragingchild	5	526	Oct 3, 2007 by ragingchild
	I had to share so beautiful (Preview) I read this somehwere and had to share it. It is so beautiful to say to the girl or woman in your life or even yourself. i think i am going to frame it and read it each day. If I had a little girl, I would tell her all the things I think she would need to know to be fully prepared for life. I would tell her that there w...	DT1221	2	536	Oct 3, 2007 by Dorothy
	setting up the wall (Preview) I have felt somewhat regrouped today after a horrible week last week and feeling incredibly stressed out about what the A may do. Of course there always has been issues about what he may do. He's done them all, crashed and destroyed the truck, got court cases, been penniless, annoyed and irritated and...	maresie2	3	605	Oct 3, 2007 by carolinagirl
	It's pointless... (Preview) I've been working my tail off going to f2f meetings, here online, personal counseling and a spiritual marriage class. One day I feel fine, that I will be okay not matter what, and then one little encounter can send me spinning. Somehow I'm thinking that there are many of you that can relate... So, this...	Loupiness	7	667	Oct 3, 2007 by QOD
	Feeling a bit better today! Stronger! (Preview) My AH came over last night. The kids and I were talking w/some folks after karate class when he called my cell phone. I started to not answer it, which surprised me. I have never been inclined to dodge him before. Anyway, I did answer it and he said he wanted to come over and see us. So I had to end my con...	QOD	5	545	Oct 3, 2007 by maresie2
	Miss You Guys! (Preview) Haven't had much time to be here, busy getting ready for new granddaughter due in Dec. Took a hospital tour with my daughter and her hubby last night. I can't believe I'm going to be a REAL gramma! I am also gearing up for my Keith Urban concert, Nov. 1. I LOVE KEITH URBAN. He was involved in an accident...	Becky1	3	433	Oct 3, 2007 by Karilynn
	The big day is upon me... (Preview) Well, today is the day. It's prison release time. I am dreading the ringing of the phone. Also I'm home today with a sick kid! Sunday we are leaving for Orlando for a week I'm going to focus on the positive and stay busy today and try not to think about my invading thoughts of impending doom! He doesn'...	carolinagirl	8	593	Oct 2, 2007 by nmike
	Sometimes, the choice of divorce or the equilavent is needed to have Peace and Serenity (Preview) I am a grateful member of the Alanon Family Group. Since, I discovered MIP, I have had a reliable and safe place to air my concerns and a place to learn from others. I recently made a choice and asked my significant other to leave. After much, much turmoil that involved the usual A behaviors (i.e. lyin...	UU_Diana	18	2340	Oct 2, 2007 by getoverit
	AH may have fallen off the wagon! (Preview) My AH came over on Friday after work. I was extremely upset b/c our 14yo son got into trouble again at school. The Friday before he got busted for leaving school after lunch and skipping his last 2 classes. This past Friday he got into trouble for having multiple verbal altercations w/a group of 9th g...	QOD	10	702	Oct 2, 2007 by maresie2
	What if.... (Preview) ((((((((((Everyone)))))))))) I was pondering something today. If you could flip a switch and everyone you know... have history with, problems with... or even everyone you have ever known... just disapeared, how would you be? This is my stupid question, so I get to make up my own rules... and the o...	rtexas	9	737	Oct 2, 2007 by abbyal
	a-ism, family, cancer (Preview) Here I am back registered once more after many months absence. I cancelled my membership, but have continued to check back in over the months. Many of the familiar names still post; many I used to see are gone. Without explaining my departure, may I just say that I need a forum. My story is a son who is an A...	omajoy	7	762	Oct 2, 2007 by abbyal
	Within three minutes (Preview) I had to call my mother for money today. I am overdrawn, again and no hope of getting any money from the ex. Still no hard copy of divorce so child support will not do anything till they get that. Fine, even when they get it I doubt I will ever see a dime. Whatever. My mother. She says ok about the money. I say t...	serendipity	3	615	Oct 2, 2007 by carolinagirl
	breakdown (Preview) I have been having some kind of breakdown lately!! Call it emotional, mental, hormonal--who really knows, but Friday I about fell to pieces! I left work sick--stomachache, headache, couldn't stop crying--just feeling awful!!!! So I headed to town, to drown away my sorrows and stress with a sho...	hudsond	9	470	Oct 2, 2007 by hudsond
	the A bottoming out (Preview) The A has sold the truck and bought some clunker. He plans to move several states away. He is still living in the trailer and the people there are going nuts trying to get him to move out. This is the second time he's done that in 6 months stuck around when people want him to move out. I don't know what he is sti...	maresie2	4	700	Oct 2, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Rollercoaster (Preview) So I have to say that the past three days have been a total rollercoaster for me. I am not properly detatching...I can see that my emotions are still so plainly affected by my husband's behavior. Not matter how hard I try it seems to cloud my mind. There was a point, I don't even remember when that I read...	Lookingforpeace	4	537	Oct 2, 2007 by hersh
	my 24 yr. old son (Preview) my son has alot of issues right now-- cant keep a job - lost his car- cant follow house rules-.drinks and some drugs- my husband his stepdad of 20yrs. does not want him here anymore. has kicked him out several times- after 2-3 weeks i let him back in and the crap starts again. - its like is the problem the h...	rebjohn	6	557	Oct 2, 2007 by cdb19
	Loneliness (Preview) Living with an active A can be a challenge and I feel like I am a strong enough person that I can let most of what he says roll off of me and not let it bother me. Especially since I have been involved with alanon and have learned about boundries and about typical A behaviors. But.....the biggest challen...	Denoraphy	4	426	Oct 1, 2007 by nmike
	latest development (Preview) The A is trying to get a write off on the truck and get a check. He has a court case coming up and wans to skip town. So he has not only destroyed the truck (which I don't know where it is) he has also sold it out from under me for an unknown sum. He plans to move several states away in order to not be imprisoned. ...	maresie2	4	637	Oct 1, 2007 by maresie2
	writing it down (Preview) sad and unsettled........ tired of myself fighting depression and all like to write things down to get them out of my head. sometimes then I can figgure it out and if I can't, some of you can usually help me. At home I can keep busy, at motel I was restless, claustrophobic and slept to calm my panic. woke...	ddub	1	360	Oct 1, 2007 by rtexas
	I'm living in one big panick attack. Help. (Preview) Ever since ah came last weekend and came clean about drinking again I have been having nightmares and I wake up at 3 or 4 in the morning dreaming about him drinking. I can't get back to sleep. I feel sick to my stomach, restless and just feel this enevitable doom. I already take meds for anxiety and depress...	Friendofyours	10	4303	Oct 1, 2007 by Loupiness
	New to this forum (Preview) Hello, I am new to this forum and I guess I kinda need to know the do's and don'ts firstly. Also would like to share with you some recent events . So here goes, my brother in law (husbands brother) is an alcoholic. His entire family and to a certain degree my husband and I are struggling with this. I g...	Carole08	9	1293	Oct 1, 2007 by Carole08
	My STOP and THINK moment (Preview) So the cycle again and again.....the controled drinking, the binging, the broken promises, it's started all over again. Sad to think I had started to believe by not only his words but by his actions. I was headed out in October to buy my Harley. Not now, it is safer to tuck the money away into CD's. Un...	marmare	3	846	Oct 1, 2007 by Karilynn
	The Question Why???? (Preview) Hello (((All))), The question why is just one that I keep asking, when it comes out I know in my heart that there is no answer. Things happen for a reason, anger builds up, sorrow has comsumed me. These things I can control, I can ask myself why am I letting it all get the best of me. Then I look at my kids a...	Andrea12	4	567	Oct 1, 2007 by mel123
	I am tired of myself (Preview) JUST FOR TODAY............... I am tired of myself. I go to face to face meeings, I work the step, practice the traditions, attend open meetings, go to AA round ups, Alanon assemblies, district meetings, and, read Alanon material daily. I even joined the local gym. [keep the focus on myself] I kn...	beaulahg	3	470	Sep 30, 2007 by beaulahg
	Don't Underestimate the power of Alcoholism (Preview) ------------------------------------------------------------------------He...	Maria123	1	595	Sep 30, 2007 by Andrea12
	The real dilemma (Preview) I guess the real dilemma for me in my situation is trying to decide what exactly IS the right thing for the kids??? Especially the boy... Here are the choices in my mind: One, you have a dad, he's in and out of your life, when he does see you he loves you and plays with you and is not abusive but it's infrequen...	carolinagirl	9	493	Sep 30, 2007 by Andrea12
	Friend of yours (Preview) How are things Friend? Are ya still having panicy feelings? Please let us know how you are. love,debilyn	debilyn	2	451	Sep 30, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Confused (Preview) Hello All - This is my first time posting on this site. I have been struggling with an "A", as you call it, for about two years now. The part that kills me is that we had 8 GREAT years together before this all happened. Anyway, I am getting to the point in our relationship where I feel that I am a...	Lookingforpeace	4	362	Sep 30, 2007 by Lookingforpeace
	THE FOG HAS CLEARED (Preview) (((((((((((((((Yo Roomies)))))))))))))) You all know I had opened a face to face group a few months ago (5 months already). Well It started off really good, got about 6 or 7 every week. I had not been commiting for the last few weeks. The members took a "Group decision" and were going to take...	ally	3	554	Sep 30, 2007 by florrie
	need prayers today (Preview) hi everyone,it has been awhile since i posted here..but i really could use some prayers today...found out on monday that my daughter and her husband might lose my grandchildren today.they have to go to the department of social services today at 10,to see what is going to happen..i have been a wreck al...	bev	12	646	Sep 30, 2007 by Maria123
	Trying to "easy do it" (Preview) My dad had his 20th back surgery on Monday. On wednesday he called and said "I know you've been so busy, and I know you've been extremely worried about me, so I'm calling to tell you that I'm fine, the surgery went well, and that I will be home a week from Saturday..." As I was listening to the ar...	Tiger2006	2	911	Sep 30, 2007 by Maria123
	HP answered a question I reflected upon from the past (Preview) Hi everyone, I was thinking about the time my friend's brother and his fiancee were in a horrible car accident. They were both flown to shock trauma. Her brother's injuries resulted in paralysis and her sister-in-law suffered from a broken arm. She called me after the accident happened and was angry...	kissers	1	463	Sep 30, 2007 by Maria123
	"EXPECTATIONS" (Preview) (((((((((((Guy))))))))))) Was surfing and came across some quotes::::: Anna Quindlen: It's important to remember that feminism is no longer a group of organizations or leaders. It's the expectations that parents have for their daughters, and their sons, too. It's the way we talk about and treat...	ally	1	429	Sep 29, 2007 by Jen
	Pepi is back home now (Preview) Pepi my dog was found at the pound She was a few blocks away but she must have been moving all the time for the whole 24 plus hours she was gone. I searched high and low for her. I didn't sleep for two days. She is absolutely fine and chomping on a bone at home Thanks for all your prayers it meant a great deal to...	maresie2	6	424	Sep 29, 2007 by Jen
	The healthy self... (Preview) I thought this needed it's own string, feel free to add! OK I'm gonna give this a shot: Ease in making everyday decisions Assumes responsibility for own actions and life Not afraid to speak up for self or disagree with others Initiating projects and finishing what you start Nurtures self by self care a...	carolinagirl	3	475	Sep 28, 2007 by ddub
	Just for the record.... (Preview) ((((((((Family)))))))))), In reference to Becky's post about Keith Urban and Diva going ga-ga over Johnny Depp. Allow me to set the record straight. While I might go a bit nuts at a football game: GO USC, GO EAGLES, I assure you I would never get crazy. (Just don't talk to my friends Joanne & Kath...	Karilynn	23	1932	Sep 28, 2007 by Andrea12
	Group conscious meeting (Preview) I have a question about the rules for a group conscious meeting. when you have one and then have the vote does majority rule. that is my question> thanks bigh	bigh	6	3279	Sep 28, 2007 by lin0606
	Ending it (Preview) I don't know how to cut ties with my boyfriend. I don't even necessarily want to never speak with him again, but I WOULD like him to move out. I've gotten to the point where he and his drinking just annoy me to death and if he does stay it is going to get worse until I have some kind of blow up and say really mean t...	summergrl83	5	512	Sep 28, 2007 by maresie2
	Why is the elephant invisible? (Preview) The addict is in complete control of the group. Like a magician they make everyone look over here and pull the trick off over there. The group is entertained and happy. But I see all the slight of hand. I hear the hallow ring in every promise uttered from the addicts lips. I am not happy or entertained. I am...	Cheryl28659	8	680	Sep 28, 2007 by Christy
	My father, the Alcoholic (Preview) I haven't spoken to my father in a year. He is very disrespectful to me in front of my daughter and can go into rages. I severed the relationship and have no desire to have a relationship with him. He also participates in cat calls while I am in his presence. I always denied how I felt when around him. Recent...	kissers	2	447	Sep 28, 2007 by QOD
	I found this interesting, this was me when I first came here! (Preview) Dependent Personality Disorder Symptoms This personality disorder is characterized by a long-standing need for the person to be taken care of and a fear of being abandoned or separated from important individuals in his or her life. This pervasive fear leads to "clinging behavior" and...	carolinagirl	9	640	Sep 28, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Update on Mom's House (Preview) As most of you know I lost my mom last year and I just wanted to share with you the following....(Art is Dad, Helen is Mom) 50 years ago this year, Art and Helen started looking for a house. Art wanted to get Helen and thier three children (I wasn't even thought of yet LOL) settled into a home before he depl...	marmare	4	606	Sep 28, 2007 by Karilynn
	That alcoholic radar (Preview) Hi Alanoners, It happens time and time again. Late this summer after my surgeries and having my AHsober tell me he didn't feel anything compassion for me, I said enough is enough. I am not going to make an effort to talk to him, cooperate, or call him about our sons. So of course he shows up for a tournamen...	nmike	5	673	Sep 28, 2007 by ddub
	THANK GAWD FOR MY SENSE OF HUMOUR:LOL (Preview) (((((((((((((Yo Roomies)))))))))))) I have been having a "pure dead crappy week". My life sucks, I am hopeless, useless, a cody, a pain in the ass, and I'm writing this right now, listening to a song, and laughing...lol Well,...	ally	3	690	Sep 27, 2007 by ddub
	Can Anyone Help Me Get Into the Chatroom? (Preview) Help! I had a harddrive breakdown and now I can't get on in the chatroom! My ex-bf's nephew was very nice in that he completely rewrote my bios(which of course I don't understand) and when I try to get into the room it says it wants to add "ActiveX" to my computer, then when I try to allow it to it s...	jonibaloni21	2	510	Sep 27, 2007 by Maria123
	one year later... (Preview) i'm starting to see the chaos that was my life on a whole new level. I hope, dear god, i hope i never become that person again. it was pain, on top of more pain, etc. i had no tools to cope...i drank. i'm here now, one year later, feeling great in my sobriety. it works if you work it. and yes, i'm worth it. ...	CAM0914	0	409	Sep 27, 2007 by CAM0914
	Let me out of this maze that is my head (Preview) have you ever felt like you were trying to solve a puzzle but you didn't quite have all the information? Well, that's how I have been feeling. It has even led to panic attacks. The answer to the puzzle is I need to have more faith in myself. I need to have confidence in me and my own abilities. So, if I alread...	seekingserenity	2	2588	Sep 27, 2007 by Kim65
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.