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emotions I haven't felt in a long time.
(Preview)
I went to the hospital today to see my X, was there two weeks ago and he looked better than today The nurse talked to me and told me that all organs have failed and the liver is shutting down. They also told me he had pnuemononia, which when I called they never told me he had it. But he over came it. They also pe...
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Bettina
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11
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512
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thank you for all the support (((hugs)))
(Preview)
Thank u all for ur posts. I read and re-read them over and over and just let everything sink in. I was that frog being boiled. Now that I reflect on it, it was a push here and their and verbal abuse was continuous. And I just stayed in the pot hoping it would cool down. I would love to post pics but If I post anyth...
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newgirl17
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9
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364
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Lost and worried
(Preview)
Hello all, Hi, I am Heidi and I live with my AH--married since 2010, sober since November 29, 2011. I am new to these boards but not to the concept. I joined several message boards to help me cope through a very difficult pregnancy loss in 2003, and I found the rapport and fellowship so helpful. I am hopin...
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Heidi H
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9
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397
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getting through...
(Preview)
It has been very sad for me these last couple of days. My face and body have bruises it is a constant reminder that I need to get better for me. My husband does not recall beating me he said he doesn't even remember getting home. He was not remorseful nor did he take responsibility for what he did. He said IF I...
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newgirl17
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25
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344
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Need Encouragement About Attending Face To Face Meeting
(Preview)
I KNOW I need to attend a face to face meeting but I am very nervous and could use some encouragement. I have never been to one before. I am never comfortable doing new things in new places with people I don't know and that makes me nervous. Luckily the meetings are in the church I grew up going to which will b...
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In The Forest
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10
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656
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Prayer candles
(Preview)
First attempt to make my prayer candles. They are far from perfect but it's practice not perfection isn't it Thank you MIP and Thank you Path to Serenity.
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Cathyinaz
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14
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258
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Grandson is homeless! Grandma had a meltdown!
(Preview)
Even though I knew it was going to happen, when I saw my grandson yesterday at a family gatering, he came with my son who he trying to "squat" at his 1 br apt. Anyway seeing him looking so sad and troubled, I couldn't take it and had to leave early, my brother walked me out to my car and I couldn't...
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Highlyfavored
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8
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364
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People and occupations of value
(Preview)
I don't know about you, but I get tired of tv and internet coverage of "famous people." It truly doesn't matter to me who scores the highest, is the prettiest or most handsome, is having a meltdown, a baby or a haircut in Hollywood, Royalty or the world of competition. Some of the folks who ar...
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grateful2be
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4
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284
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Family Dinners With The In-Laws Create Anxiety
(Preview)
This is my first time posting here but I have been reading a lot and trying to learn. It has provided me a lot of knowledge and comfort. I am still just trying to accept the reality of my situation. I have never been to a face to face meeting but I am trying to get brave enough to do that. I am here because my husb...
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In The Forest
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19
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752
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My feelings and emotions!!!! Ugg
(Preview)
Right now at this moment.. I am thinking about my son.. I just can't seem to keep the focus on my and my recovery. I spoke with him on Sunday and he sounds great and is so in touch with his higher power.. And I told him I have fears!! He responded that he has to work on him and he can't control how I feel and I need t...
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Gaby
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7
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461
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First meeting in 4 weeks
(Preview)
Well had my first meeting in 4 weeks about 2 hours ago & it was well needed. Was good to talk to the group & it has cleared my head for now. Even when I come home to my AW whos on a roll and a bottle and a half up & offering me scotchs,hey ho.
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gorby928
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6
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270
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LOST
(Preview)
Hi i am new her My name is Tina l. I have had the roughest month in my life. I had to put my husband in a mental hospital because he was so messed up on drugs and alcohol that he tried to kill himself by od-ing. they found him mentally incompetent and he has bipolar 1. i have to go see him today and i feel very alone...
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Tina L
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15
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368
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Fear ;(
(Preview)
I have not been on here since my last visit with my son. I am working on my recovery in healing, but i am having a hard time on letting go.. I stop and think (PROJECTION) what is it going to be like when he comes home. If not home just back in the town he ran a muck.. I see my son so spiritual so close to his god and be...
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Gaby
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6
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493
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Am I going to have a great Sunday or not?
(Preview)
I am supposed to be getting ready for work, but after checking my email and reading one from the exAH, that and checking my bank account I have just lost my motivation. I need to shake it off rub some al-anon on it and get my perky self out the door. Sometimes for what seems like no reason I let myself do the po...
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Breakingfree
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10
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329
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grateful
(Preview)
Hi Everyone: Just want to share some thoughts of gratefulness today: Grateful for: --this board, where I have read in others' posts descriptions of my own life, and have learned so much from all of you about the true nature of human strength --my three kids, all thriving, beautiful, smart and percept...
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yanksfan51
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6
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211
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Feelings are ok
(Preview)
I heard something at a meeting this week thtat has stuck with me. Feelings are not good or bad, right or wrong. They are just feelings. It is how I choose to react to the feeling that is important. I can still feel sad, angry, frustrated, happy, anxious...whatever. The hard part is choosing how to act on t...
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ParisMemories
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7
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281
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Perhaps a bit of wisdom from Hollywood?
(Preview)
"Bear witness to the situation and have faith that the right thing to do will emerge." Jeff Bridges Loved this message as it came through it's messenger this morning. Thought I'd share it.
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grateful2be
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1
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182
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What slogan am I working today
(Preview)
ONE day at a time I am trying to fill a vacancy (need to work 2 ams per week and need 2 more days to equal that) So, here I am projecting and wondering "OMG, what if this happens or that happens????" the usual what ifs fear based garbage so....ONE day at a time TODAY my needs are met no set backs...
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neshema2
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2
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179
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Response to Jerry's thread, tonights fireworks, life
(Preview)
Sorry Paula, I love fireworks, spent a hundred on them but I went to a place where tons of people all gather to light them, the local volunteer fire dept patrols and puts out fires, its a hoot for pyromaniacs. We were there a bit when my daughter announced she had lost an earring, one of those expensive thi...
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likemyheart
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8
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319
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My son
(Preview)
It's so hard not to cry about what we can't fix and the feelings are strong within. I often say WHY WHY is this still happening after all he has been through. I want so hard to just go away and never come back to watch the one my love destroy himself. I get the text and am asked for comments and I don't answer...
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Cathyinaz
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21
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611
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everything is OK
(Preview)
So everything is OK but not great yet! Still struggling w/ recovery from surgery. My eyes seem to be OK but I am still nervous about them--my next appt. is on the 23rd--month post-op on the second surgery. I still feel like I want to touch them when they bother me. I also am struggling w/ washing my hair in t...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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313
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Should I stay or should I go now?
(Preview)
I realize that if I leave it needs to be because I am at my wits end and can't take it anymore and not to try to manipulate or control his behavior. That being said though, part of me thinking about leaving is hoping it does give him incentive. He is often on the cusp, knowing he has a problem then denying it. I...
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callmemara
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10
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453
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Sighting
(Preview)
I went to pick up my daughter from a supervised evening visit with her (A) father, at his parent's house. With a protection order in place, he is supposed to stay away from me, though I am able to drive to their house to pick up my daughter - so he stays in the house. Last night, he was standing in the drivew...
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KLotus
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14
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314
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The things I cannot change...
(Preview)
the past... my attitudes... one day at a time. I think I came into this forum from another MIP programme... I think mebbe I have some sort of leadership there... I come here for support- and to sort out my loyalty with Alanon. My loyalty has grown a lot... and so has my peace of mind... Lately I went to see...
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DavidG
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13
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504
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Customer service, lies, patience and practice
(Preview)
Went to the Credit Union today after posting on anger. There have been several issues there (and there is no other where the same thing doesn't happen in one way or another in our City) since I became a member that tend to set my teeth on edge as I breathe, feel, wait and practice. My tongue wants out, out...
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grateful2be
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12
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331
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my post and ?? was too dumb....I deleted it
(Preview)
I guess this ??? was just too dumb to get answers... I think I will continue shunning her ------ I remember 4 letters J A D E -- Edited by neshema2 on Friday 5th of July 2013 04:00:16 PM -- Edited by neshema2 on Friday 5th of July 2013 04:01:34 PM
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neshema2
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11
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372
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Need Sunday chair substitute
(Preview)
Sorry I didn't put this on the Chat Room board, but for some reason it won't recognize my password. My laptop is in the shop, which is what holds my scripts, and also how I work around mom's unpredictable Alzheimer's behavior (I am more mobile). I have a desktop in the basement, but if mom is up, I can't log...
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Overcome
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1
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175
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And so it begins (vent)
(Preview)
I've been doing pretty good for the most part .. I can tell I missed meetings this week and I am going to look at getting into one tonight, being the 4th I don't know if I will be able to or not. Meaning .. if the meeting is going on being the 4th and all. I have totally kicked my program out of the window at the...
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Pushka
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12
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1489
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lost keys and Zen thinking
(Preview)
So, I said in a previous post that I lost my keys at the free-for-all fireworks fun last night. What strikes me as amazing is, upon hearing that I couldn't find my keys, my daughter dug in her purse, found a copy of my car key and proclaimed that we could make it home. During the ride home she remarked that ma...
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likemyheart
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2
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266
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Mobile Site Question
(Preview)
Hi Friends When I try to view this site on a blackberry or on a Nook, I am unable to read the text. It looks like the color scheme for the mobile version has changed, and the text is very light grey on a white background. Has anyone else had this problem?
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ParisMemories
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6
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190
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My weekend plans
(Preview)
Well yesterday pretty much didn't go according to plan on any level. The kids and I made the most of it as we always do. Life is what it is .. with the disappointments can come great joy .. looking for it is part of the gift I want to give my kids. See the good out of the bad and let go of the bad. Today I though...
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Pushka
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1
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234
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Anger is Normal
(Preview)
Hi MIPers... You know, anger is a normal reaction to being betrayed, lied to, stolen from, etc. Sometimes when folks vent on the board...I sense, just sometimes, people being condescending, as if somehow if you are angry you are not very far along in recovery. I don't think anger is inconsistent with...
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rehprof
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17
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417
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No make up or up do and I am still beautiful
(Preview)
My exAH had a lot of the normal A things going on, but he was so good at telling me I had a natural beauty without all the make up and hair do's put on. I am now dating a guy that has let me know he prefers when I am all done up. The funny thing is, he doesn't dress up much and is super casual and it makes me down grade m...
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Breakingfree
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15
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440
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Kids :)
(Preview)
I'm REALLY excited for Monday (I have court nothing special or new .. LOL) .. I AM excited though as I just found out one of the RA's I know his daughter is starting an Alateen group here in town every Monday night .. I'm over the MOON!!! VERY excited!! My daughter is having a fit about going and I just laugh...
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Pushka
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4
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204
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OK...H.A.L.T...reviewed...
(Preview)
I'm sitting here at my 'puter reading bleary eyed with my left index finger bandaged and stitched. I posted H.A.L.T. earlier before going to work and made it to work without incident. After I got there I got incident. I was too Angry and Tired and miscued a cut I was doing to some detached ginger sta...
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Jerry F
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9
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409
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HAPPY 4TH OF JULY MY ALANONERS........
(Preview)
Here is wishing that ALL my alanoners, MIP family have a GR8 and fun filled 4th of July Daughter dysfunctional is not speaking to me b/c I won't be mired in her drama and passive aggression, so I'll mosey down a 2 mile drive to the public pool which is lovely and nice people and have some fun and chat w/the...
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neshema2
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4
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255
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Recovery a day at a time
(Preview)
My name is Paris and I am a grateful member of Al-anon . The past few weeks I've really been leaning on my HP, and he is guiding me in the right direction. I have been going to many meetings, have talked with my sponsor, and been able to (mostly) control my reactions and take much better care of myself. AH has...
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ParisMemories
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2
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238
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Self Pity ...
(Preview)
Last Nights topic at the Wednesday Night Turning Point AFG. Wish you all were there. It was a hummer and I am grateful for it cause HP kept prodding me on the important points to listen to with an open mind. It isn't only the poor me feelings. It can be and has been demonstrated thru anger and rage. I...
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Jerry F
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8
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472
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Small children
(Preview)
Hello again! Is there a hope that small kids will grow up normal without any dependencies and issues if one parent is normal? My kids are 6 and 8 now, I am starting to work on my co-dependency. We are still living with my AH and we have good times and sometimes my AH locks himself in the room for a few days and d...
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Venera
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15
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838
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I left but I hope for help for my AH
(Preview)
I left my AH a week and a half ago. It was more than the alcohol...but I still hope for him a chance at recovery. I understand that I cannot control what he does, it is not my responsibility. I don't want to coerce him into going to AA, but I do want to try to make it easier to reach out. I just don't know...I was...
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sadsusie
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12
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442
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The family disease.
(Preview)
Last August we moved from Vancouver Canada back to my home country of Sydney Australia. My qualifier is Canadian. This week my qualifier Husband has had a really bad eye infection. Turns out he has viral conjunctivitis. I have had a hard time showing him compassion because the way he carries on you wo...
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sportychick
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4
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339
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In a bad head space right now
(Preview)
I should be happy, its July 4th and I'm at work. I got to spend time with my nephew today which is always fun..he's 1. However all I can think about today are the 'what if my A starts drinking again today?' etc. I've had bad experiences with holidays of any kind many times in the past and as good as the last 4 ye...
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phoenixmagicgirl
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4
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279
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I had to leave...
(Preview)
My husband got home drunk. He collapsed in the back room it looked like he wasn't breathing. I got close to him and asked if he was ok i got no response from him. I got concerned and kind of shook him to see if he was conscious or not. He rolled over and slapped me. I said please don't hit me but then he went into a...
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newgirl17
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16
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541
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My day. My learnings. My gratitude.
(Preview)
I had a good afternoon and evening with my daughter and grandson today. Just a normal day with a trip to a movie, then home to TRY to grill hamburgers (they wouldn't cook up - guess the overpriced pre-lighted charcoals have taught me a lesson) and then TRY to broil them in the oven. It must have taken an h...
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grateful2be
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4
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212
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How to plan for delivery of a new baby?
(Preview)
My AH has been drinking in average one week every 1-2 months. I am due to deliver our third baby in 3 months and need start making plans who is going to come with me and pick me up from the hospital. He wants this baby and when sober is a good husband, unfortunately I have no idea when his next drinking period i...
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Venera
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11
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338
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Confront or ignore?
(Preview)
Hi, please share your opinions. I am still new to this and dont know al the answers. I know I need to take care of my own recovery, but some questions come up about the AH as we go. He is in Mexico with his A friend for a week, the excuse to go is to "take care of the house", we are building a house over t...
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Venera
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17
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796
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Nature, my son, and poetry rephrased
(Preview)
Last night, I called my son at the place where he's been paroled to stay on tether at the time set by the state to the phone he's been issued that allows only incoming calls. Phone rang 4 times. Picked up. Hung up. Since it is a strange phone system, I called again. He picked up. His words were slurre...
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grateful2be
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5
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358
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Alanon and our children
(Preview)
I am looking at my happy 4th of July post and I am thinking....OK Yea, I was codep. but I know in my heart I was a good mom....THAT is probably the ONE thing I did NOT screw up on... However, that said, I still presented the program by example to my girls...The older one glommed on to it like a pro...Just tucke...
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neshema2
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4
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260
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Never thought I would do THIS---But you guys inspire me
(Preview)
Didn't think I would want to show my face..But I see the handsome and pretty smiling faces at me when I read...Not ashamed of who they are and even proud to be who they are So..Here is a pic of me and my bunny buddy last month...I was in the bathroom, LOL when I took this I am sooo bad taking pics, as a child my si...
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neshema2
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4
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191
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addicted to alanon?
(Preview)
I have heard people say over the years that they think people in recovery get addicted to their meetings. Addiction implies a behavior that is negative that someone repeats over and over again with the same results. So last night in my F2F I shared that I felt alanon is not an addiction for me, but a li...
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Lyne
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6
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821
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Stopping the verbal abuse!!
(Preview)
My AH has been blind siding me with his toxic, hateful, ugly verbal darts for over 7 yrs now! AND I have had it! These attacks are a result of his evening drinking and can come out of no where. He will often be angry or agitated at something/someone else and lash out at me! I do my best to not engage or fight ba...
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chamoisdog
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11
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395
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husband sober 17yrs relapse
(Preview)
My husband has been sober 17 years until last week. He went to a concert with a friend. I suspected his friend was a pot smoker the night he left. Later I found on the computer topics googled that looked like he was trying to figure out how to pass a drug test after smoking pot. So I confronted him. I asked i...
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nancymom4
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17
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506
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Melt down to much expectations
(Preview)
I'm over whelmed . My ah will not stop talking. Boundarys are not working I'm fed up . In drained!! My heart is on overdrive . 8 months sober he his . Again in still on step3 . Please stop tossing extra chores for me to do. He not well still and proved it over and over. Then he wants to start reading about the Bou...
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Ms co-dependent
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6
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342
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Blaming others
(Preview)
Currently I have a woman in my life who just dropped in there in March of this year. I had no idea she was going to be so important. There are so many levels to relating to her. In so many ways she is such a gift because I really do not want to believe I have any character defects. Everyone else has. I don't. To...
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orchidlover
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10
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388
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I've been to several al anon meetings now but I am really confused
(Preview)
From what I am hearing, I have to change myself before there will be any solution to my husband's drinking. He had a major drinking problem over thirty years ago and solved it by just quitting drinking altogether. For thirty years, he did not drink at all. About five years ago, he decided that he could dr...
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deacon
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9
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533
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Did your A start AA? Or any kind of treatment?
(Preview)
How does that happened? Everybody writes here that it is useless to talk to them, untill they are ready they wont do anything. But I am just curious, for those who were ready, how did that happened?
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Venera
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5
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337
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If Winter comes
(Preview)
The famous poet Shelly said, " If Winter comes, can Spring be far behind? No matter how long and bitter winter may be, spring always follows. This is the law of the universe, the joyful law of life. Here's to a joyful and hopeful day! Bettina
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Bettina
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4
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245
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Only one huge consequence...
(Preview)
for this fixer who couldn't fix himself other than to turn himself over to those who could and would; is the realization of what happens when I turn myself over without fear, anxiety, projection and the other "fear" tools I use to have. While others were trying and doing their part to &qu...
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Jerry F
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4
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235
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Mistaken for Love!
(Preview)
"It is easy to mistake control and dependency for love. The truth of love, however , is found in our sincerity to act for the happiness and freedom of others." Shin Yatomi
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Bettina
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7
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501
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Opinions Wanted
(Preview)
When an alcoholic detoxes and has a brief time of not drinking, why do they start again without giving someone the opportunity to help them? Is it because they really don't want to be stopped? On the show Addictions, the host is a former addict and I have heard her say that when you start to use again after...
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wornoutmrsfixit
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13
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365
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