Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Gailey · Gailey

I know that my HP has something better for me. I believe that our HP does have a plan for us. I can relate this to a spouse, bf or gf of an A. My problem comes in when I try to relate it to my child. As a spouse, bf or gf you can one day ,hopefully, have a better life without the A in your life. (I did) Ho...

Jennifer · Jennifer

hello ((Everyone)) When I said in my last post that things were getting ugly around here I grossly UNESTIMATED. Today has really been the topper for me and I need some serious advice and ESH. My AH called me at work and said he wanted to walk home with me. Sounded OK so I said sure. When he got there, he i...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, my AH boyfriend has been not drinking for four of five months now. He was in treatment for a while...went in by his own choice. He did have a lapse for a few days three weeks ago, and he and his drinking pals went out. Then the money ran out. We don't live together, and I detatched as best I coul...

DoN4me · DoN4me

I have had some time away from my son as I have posted before. Sometime with my animals and me and work. In that time that I had I got alot of time to reflect on me. Which has been a real eye opening experiance for me. I have worked on all my relationships with my family. I have even been working on my relation...

itsgot2bgd · itsgot2bgd

Hi all, Boy, I've just read some of the posts here and I have to say, coming to al-anon is like coming home -- to a more functional, loving home... a safe home, a comforting home... like running into your grandma's arms -- where you know it's all gonna be ok. I've been in and out of t...

debilyn · debilyn

Well he sends me a letter saying he does not want a divorce. So I just wrote one back saying well he better work hard on changing my mind. Told him I deserve respect. Plus I am tired of being a fool staying married to someone who makes it very apparent I am the last thing he thinks about. I need it to be over so...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

I haven't posted in a while, have been out of town a few weeks, but this post has been building for some time. I hope you don't mind my rambling share, it helps me to stay in what is real and stop putting things off as no big deal. I met my A at 18, we married at 25. I made the comment to him t...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

>>i thought this was a pretty cool thing on step eleven....i took parts of it, and i gave MY esh in the colored type It took me many years in Al-Anon to get to StepEleven, the "prayer and meditation" step. When Ifinally got there, after wrestling with Steps Fourthrough Ten, Ste...

hudsond · hudsond

Ok. I had a dream last night, that when I was awoken (is that a word) I thought oh my word. Thought I'd share it I was driving in my car after dropping my ah off at the mechanic's to drop off his truck. Then I decided he was probably hungry so I went to pick him up a pizza. Then in my rearview mirror and saw him...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Hello--Lately I've found myself into projection. Anytime my life hits a new growth spurt, I project. I can't do this; I'll be a failure; I'm going to bomb out; things like that. I talked with my sponsor and some program friends earlier today about projection and my stinkin' thinking. So I feel alot b...

lebe27 · lebe27

A started drinking again the day before yesterday. He only made it one week this time. This time excuse was guy he had given his old truck to and paid for his registration too boot didn't show to help him with some things around our house he was suppose to do as payment. The guy keeps ma...

shadow1 · shadow1

I just got a phone call from a friend. Her 14 year old daughter Amanda is undergoing testing for leukemia. Please say a prayer for her and her mother. They could use all the help they can get. Thanks Shadow

slkcma · slkcma

First I'd like to say that I hope you all find the peace you deserve! Peace and contentment is my goal. After all these years, I've finally realized that my surroundings and trying to change others around me isn't going to bring me that. I have alot of work to do within myself. I'll first mention...

maresie2 · maresie2

I have been working for 3 months now and so far the A has not conned me on any level out of money. Tonight I find out he made only a partial payment on the rent (he has done that for months I think) and we got a three day notice. The landlord is fed up with getting only partial payments and a song and dance (which t...

nycbt · nycbt

Since I started with Alanon my marriage to an a has gotten alot better. He bought me a flag ring no special reason. When I start we were having yelling matchs, i was staying at my parents house when he started to act up. I was taught how to put myself forward i am not perfect and i had a disagree yesterday howe...

Lindy · Lindy

My AH has money problems, mostly due to his drinking and gambling. He gets laid off from work and chooses to spend his time (and money) drinking and gambling. Last night he told me is trying to get a home equity type loan thru his union. He said he would use it to pay off his credit cards and remodel the bas...

Belongtome · Belongtome

Well....after getting all bent out of shape yesterday over my A's desire to put our money into his car instead of overdue bills....things just went downhill. The sale of the boat didn't go through, so there isn't enough money to worry about!!!! But, last night I had my weekly golf outing with daug...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there...to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be but you lock eyes with them, you know that very moment that t...

Dog · Dog

I am new to Alanon... this week will be my f2f meeting, so I've been going about a month. I have a question for the oldtimers. I don't want to talk! It's not that I am shy. I am anything but shy, but so far, I have not had anything "authentic" to say during a meeting. I have chatted before the meetings, and been...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I cannot find a link to the pm box anywhere, maybe I'm just not seeing it. There is a message there that I want to reply to and darned if I can find my way there. TIA

dori · dori

Hi, I just went back and read morbies post on what addicts do and it was another reminder how blessed I am he is not in my life any more.It is so funny how some of us are blessed enough to get out of the relationship and we forget all the sleepless nights the cheating the lieing and the abuse and we tha...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

Hello Group, Today is 30 days sober for my A. I can see the challenges he faced this month as well as myself. For me it was my insecurity, my anger, my fear. The behaviors are still there for the A. The anger and rages are not as bad. He has been able to control himself in s...

mandalynn38 · mandalynn38

I am having a hard day today. My A boyfriend went into a rage on Friday with that I have not seen him since Sunday morning. He came to my house on Saturday night late and he spent the night.. I dropped him off back to his house on sunday. I have not seen him or spoke to him since. My choice, because I have t...

Keoki · Keoki

Finally made it to a al-anon mtg. lotsa nice folks with lotsa encouragements! I plan on it being a weekly stop. Found the books that I've been told about too. I've been told that the alateen in my area will be starting up again so that the kids will have the help that they need to...

heartless39470 · heartless39470

I never thought my life would end up like it is. I always dreamed of being happily married with the house white picket fence, & the kids. Needless to say it didn't end up like that. I met my husband in highschool. I loved him unconditionally. As teenagers we did our share of partying. I never thought h...

Belongtome · Belongtome

I'm losing it...and I'd been doing so well. I guess when things are going okay, I think I don't have to work my program...especially the "being good to myself" part, and then it all slides downhill. I looked back over my own posts, and it seems like I have this recording that is broken...isn't t...

angel123 · angel123

Detachment means not worrying,not judging and not rescuing. Hope ever tells us tomarrow will be better. If we share another's burden,both of us will walk straighter. Just for today I will treat myself gently and nuture the child within. Losers say"I can't"winners say,"I'll t...

Lindy · Lindy

Just when I start to kind of pull myself together something my AH does comes back to bring me back down. I was starting to feel a little better today after the bad weekend I had. I checked my checking account on-line just now and found four $29 overdraft charges on my account. My money is separate from my...

Gailey · Gailey

Lately I have been so disorganized. My desk at work seems to always be a mess. I spend too much time on this board and do not seem to get things done the way I used to. I think I am becoming addicted to MIP. At home I do not get things done unless I am "under the gun" so to speak. I am last minute with everything. It...

April306 · April306

I'm sorry to say I rarely post here but do read all of your thoughts and experiences and they help me so much. I do go to alanon meetings every week also and am doing my best to work the program and feel better. However, for the past month or so I have been crying every day, even at work and even in...

serendipity · serendipity

i want to talk to my ah and tell him that insted of doing whatever it is he is doing he should be with his kids. he had a whole day that he didn't work and he never even called to ask if he could be with our 3 year old. i bet it never even occured to him. i know it didn't. or he sees his son from a prevoius marria...

iwishuheaven · iwishuheaven

I am quite new to Al-Alon and never been to a meeting yet. I ahve a few questions about them I am hoping ypou can answer. 1. Are they for anyone who suffers form A in thier family? i.e. ACoA and spouses, etc... 2. Does it matter where you go I noticed that all the one in my area have differnt names, does t...

allison · allison

Hi everyone...more crap for me to vent about.quick history...my active A husband has been gone 7 months.we have 4 children and he gives me no money..infact he has cost me money...credit card bills..income tax debts etc. he has been living with his brother and he finally had enough and left the apt. an...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((((((((((((((((Lmt))))))))))))))))))))), Where are you sweet friend? I miss seeing you! Love and blessings to you and your family! Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

Today has been tough. Last nite I did a sleep study test. The paper work trigger the past for me. One question asked to underline words that describe yourself. Lazy, no good, deadbeat, on & on for almost a whole paragraph then the descriptions started getting better and more p...

hudsond · hudsond

Hi there everybody. I haven't been on in a few weeks. I used to get online at school and well it's closed for the summer, and I mistakenly thought I could handle alone for a few weeks. INSANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought things were going pretty good. I knew not great, but amazing when you aren't...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Thought I'd share our meeting topic last night: Waiting. Waiting can be a good thing in program, making wise choices when we are not angry and/or impulsive. Waiting on the other hand, well, you know, makes us feel like we are just sinking more into the quicksand.&nb...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello ((((Everyone)))) I haven't talked lately about where I am or what I am doing so here it goes .... I moved back to the house 2 weeks ago, by choice but not for long. I need time to pack and sort, do repairs etc. I found chaos and mayhem. So here I am changing what I can. While I stay here I do...

iwishuheaven · iwishuheaven

Last night I got into an aruement with my wife and it it hasn't ended yet. She went out last night and I was at home with our two kids. They really pushed me to the limits when it came to bed time and it took everything I had to stay cool. About 45 minutes after my eldest (2 1/2 years old) went to bed my youngest (1...

confused · confused

I have been really busy with baaseball, kids, meetings etc and have only had time to get my online fix by reading and occasionally a quick reply. Today was the last day of school for the summer and I am so looking forward to being able to be a better participant here at MIP. I just wanted to say that...

angel123 · angel123

Affirmations: ..I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE .. To all the things that are good about me.... And I shall from this day forward, No longer try to be everything to everybody. Nor will I be someone I'm not. I shall no longer use all my energies to fulfill the dreams of others while mine go unattended. I shall use my as...

Rita G · Rita G

Today is my youngest granddaughter's first birthday, Caroline Olivia - I haven't seen her in over three months. Her mom, Ashley (our daughter) is the one that I saw last week in rehab. Caroline is staying with her other grandparents(Ashley's Mom & Step-Dad) who do no...

lilms · lilms

Am a little bit, no a big bit confused here. Detachemnt to me means not diving a damn. What does it mean to you all. I can detach, shut down, not care...all of those things. I cannot care and detach at the same time. Any thoughts?????? Ty all lilms

kellyjelly · kellyjelly

ok people i get it, i'm sick, but what now ??? see i know i'm sick i feel sick to the bottom of my stomach, and it hurts!!! it hurts so bad and i just want it to stop. so how do i do that ??? problem one i dont know whats wrong only that its very wrong and if you dont know what it is how do you fix it ?? problem two th...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) This is the question I asked myself today. I used to do better when my AW was not raging at me. Period. She starts raging and I flip out. Then everything gets me... work, the kids and their little tragedys, the guy driving like an idiot in front of me...&nb...

Lindy · Lindy

My AH says he doesn't need AA and that he "does nothing wrong". I begged and cried for him to change things. I told him he could drink all he wants as long as he's not mean. He says I am the one who is mean. He says all I want to do is change him. I said I don't like to be cut down when he's drunk and I damn sure don't li...

debilyn · debilyn

I loved all your posts to me. Made me feel better. So please now all of you, get your tents and stuff and kids and dogs and whatever and come camp at Eden and have a pignic with me. love,debilyn

debilyn · debilyn

Hello. guess it is my turn to share. It is rough right now. Comes a point that a vacation is not a want but a need. I love it here, I love my life. Just need to have a day or two or three to wake up to go back to sleep again. Not feed someone as soon as my feet hit the floor. Doing my best to get my budget goi...

d53sjurne · d53sjurne

Hi John, I have a question for you as a matter of fact 2 or 3 . Today when I was putting posts on the board, some how my name had a number added to it and couldn't get in. Somehow my password was changed too. Not sure how to get in touch with you. Could you please check into it for me. Also I was in chat...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

I noticed something about myself last nite in a meeting with the other caretakers of the elderly man I sit with. I tend to feel like when someone brings up something that is not being done by one of the other caretakers, I immediately think that they are talking about me. It looked like she was look...

Miranda · Miranda

All the stupid cards out there used to drive me absolutely insane. Now that I don't have to get them/ can't get them anymore, I almost miss it. I've done a lot of I dunno what to call it, discovering lately. Everything's been insane, and things have gotten really hard to deal with. Ecspecially being new o...

angelnomore · angelnomore

Dear A- ex I’m sorry I called you, I tried and tried to be strong and my weakness prevailed. I hate myself for calling you, I hate so much now. Why couldn’t I have been stronger and said “you know what AA-X , what make you think I give a Sh*# about you” but no INSTEAD, I helpe...

LALA1 · LALA1

I am still new to al-anon and this time around I am really trying to work on me. I came to a few meetings at the end of last year but I did not stick to it. I think I came more for my A than for me. Now I am really ready to work on myself for me and me only. I am going to f2f meetings but there...

Keoki · Keoki

I made her choose, I did not make her choice! How can she continue to blame me for the terrible choices she made and the impact that they are still having on our entire family? Why can't she see the connection between her drinking and our failing marriage, her blackout...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

I am getting ready to leave. I have been up since almost 8 am. I have feed all but 8 dogs, we have 29. My A is still in bed. I know she is awake. I still have to unload the truck from our sale saturday. She has not drank since Saturday. I am wondering why we buy groceries at all. My A has told a freind of o...

AlaMom · AlaMom

Yesterday being father's day I conteplated calling my father. I went back and forth with it a few times. Asking myself when I was going to stop chasing the relationship I will never have with him. Does he after all the years of ignoring 2 of his 3 children deserve a phone call w...

marchgrl · marchgrl

Hello To All, I am not a new member. In fact, I used to frequent this message board a few years back and I am so glad I have come back. I forgot what it feels like to read these messages and just keep an awareness of myself through your post's. To help if I can and to laugh is what...

rosie light shines · rosie light shines

i am not letting ANYONE "time" my recovery it took a LONG time for me to get **this** sick....**this** messed up.....it took a long time and LOTS of trauma and RE-trauma for the *candle of hope* to damned near blow out for me..... so it isn't gonna be overnight that i recover.... i have...

jacksmom · jacksmom

I have not heard from him in over 24 hours. He was supposed to call last night. How do you get through a day without crying and feeling helpless and depressed? For all I know he's dead. When he does call and tells me he's fine, how do I not get mad at him for not calling? I wan...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

ok I get the no gossip , no criticism, no sarcasm but what if everyone you come in contact with doesn't. I can already forcast what they are going to say. I have several in my life who are into gossip, criticism etc. I see this as negative. No I can not just avoid these people. I find myself with less an...

	Sub Forum	Topics	Posts	Last Post
	Al-anon speakers - Read Only Al-anon speakers	2	2	October 26th by WebHelper
	Old sticky posts - Read Only Not sure what to do with these so parking them here.	6	91	Mar 10, 2026 by yopame7132

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I don't understand this concept (Preview) I know that my HP has something better for me. I believe that our HP does have a plan for us. I can relate this to a spouse, bf or gf of an A. My problem comes in when I try to relate it to my child. As a spouse, bf or gf you can one day ,hopefully, have a better life without the A in your life. (I did) Ho...	Gailey	2	540	Jun 23, 2006 by Rita G
	I need some serious ESH (Preview) hello ((Everyone)) When I said in my last post that things were getting ugly around here I grossly UNESTIMATED. Today has really been the topper for me and I need some serious advice and ESH. My AH called me at work and said he wanted to walk home with me. Sounded OK so I said sure. When he got there, he i...	Jennifer	6	482	Jun 23, 2006 by iwishuheaven
	he's not drinking today...why am I so guilty? (Preview) Hi everyone, my AH boyfriend has been not drinking for four of five months now. He was in treatment for a while...went in by his own choice. He did have a lapse for a few days three weeks ago, and he and his drinking pals went out. Then the money ran out. We don't live together, and I detatched as best I coul...	annmarie	5	431	Jun 23, 2006 by annmarie
	Gaining a new perspective (Preview) I have had some time away from my son as I have posted before. Sometime with my animals and me and work. In that time that I had I got alot of time to reflect on me. Which has been a real eye opening experiance for me. I have worked on all my relationships with my family. I have even been working on my relation...	DoN4me	2	416	Jun 23, 2006 by nycbt
	It's like coming home (Preview) Hi all, Boy, I've just read some of the posts here and I have to say, coming to al-anon is like coming home -- to a more functional, loving home... a safe home, a comforting home... like running into your grandma's arms -- where you know it's all gonna be ok. I've been in and out of t...	itsgot2bgd	4	431	Jun 22, 2006 by itsgot2bgd
	update on jailbird (Preview) Well he sends me a letter saying he does not want a divorce. So I just wrote one back saying well he better work hard on changing my mind. Told him I deserve respect. Plus I am tired of being a fool staying married to someone who makes it very apparent I am the last thing he thinks about. I need it to be over so...	debilyn	7	521	Jun 22, 2006 by Lunamoth
	Facing my bridge (Preview) I haven't posted in a while, have been out of town a few weeks, but this post has been building for some time. I hope you don't mind my rambling share, it helps me to stay in what is real and stop putting things off as no big deal. I met my A at 18, we married at 25. I made the comment to him t...	Lunamoth	8	625	Jun 22, 2006 by Jennifer
	what do ya'll think about step eleven?? (Preview) >>i thought this was a pretty cool thing on step eleven....i took parts of it, and i gave MY esh in the colored type It took me many years in Al-Anon to get to StepEleven, the "prayer and meditation" step. When Ifinally got there, after wrestling with Steps Fourthrough Ten, Ste...	rosie light shines	2	589	Jun 22, 2006 by jrtjosey
	Dream (Preview) Ok. I had a dream last night, that when I was awoken (is that a word) I thought oh my word. Thought I'd share it I was driving in my car after dropping my ah off at the mechanic's to drop off his truck. Then I decided he was probably hungry so I went to pick him up a pizza. Then in my rearview mirror and saw him...	hudsond	3	525	Jun 22, 2006 by Jennifer
	Projection E/S/H (Preview) Hello--Lately I've found myself into projection. Anytime my life hits a new growth spurt, I project. I can't do this; I'll be a failure; I'm going to bomb out; things like that. I talked with my sponsor and some program friends earlier today about projection and my stinkin' thinking. So I feel alot b...	Tiger2006	6	2520	Jun 22, 2006 by abbyal
	Some Progress (Preview) A started drinking again the day before yesterday. He only made it one week this time. This time excuse was guy he had given his old truck to and paid for his registration too boot didn't show to help him with some things around our house he was suppose to do as payment. The guy keeps ma...	lebe27	6	431	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Prayers needed please (Preview) I just got a phone call from a friend. Her 14 year old daughter Amanda is undergoing testing for leukemia. Please say a prayer for her and her mother. They could use all the help they can get. Thanks Shadow	shadow1	7	498	Jun 22, 2006 by aunitedway
	Hi all, I'm new here (Preview) First I'd like to say that I hope you all find the peace you deserve! Peace and contentment is my goal. After all these years, I've finally realized that my surroundings and trying to change others around me isn't going to bring me that. I have alot of work to do within myself. I'll first mention...	slkcma	5	548	Jun 22, 2006 by slkcma
	when everything is a lie (Preview) I have been working for 3 months now and so far the A has not conned me on any level out of money. Tonight I find out he made only a partial payment on the rent (he has done that for months I think) and we got a three day notice. The landlord is fed up with getting only partial payments and a song and dance (which t...	maresie2	2	590	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	a ring (Preview) Since I started with Alanon my marriage to an a has gotten alot better. He bought me a flag ring no special reason. When I start we were having yelling matchs, i was staying at my parents house when he started to act up. I was taught how to put myself forward i am not perfect and i had a disagree yesterday howe...	nycbt	4	487	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Caught AH trying to con me again (Preview) My AH has money problems, mostly due to his drinking and gambling. He gets laid off from work and chooses to spend his time (and money) drinking and gambling. Last night he told me is trying to get a home equity type loan thru his union. He said he would use it to pay off his credit cards and remodel the bas...	Lindy	4	474	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Insult to Injury (Preview) Well....after getting all bent out of shape yesterday over my A's desire to put our money into his car instead of overdue bills....things just went downhill. The sale of the boat didn't go through, so there isn't enough money to worry about!!!! But, last night I had my weekly golf outing with daug...	Belongtome	6	530	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Things Happen for a Reason (Preview) Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there...to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be but you lock eyes with them, you know that very moment that t...	Mobirdie	4	659	Jun 22, 2006 by dori
	Newcomers speaking up in meetings (Preview) I am new to Alanon... this week will be my f2f meeting, so I've been going about a month. I have a question for the oldtimers. I don't want to talk! It's not that I am shy. I am anything but shy, but so far, I have not had anything "authentic" to say during a meeting. I have chatted before the meetings, and been...	Dog	12	720	Jun 22, 2006 by Tiger2006
	How do I get to my pm box (Preview) I cannot find a link to the pm box anywhere, maybe I'm just not seeing it. There is a message there that I want to reply to and darned if I can find my way there. TIA	Mobirdie	2	483	Jun 22, 2006 by Mobirdie
	what addicts do (Preview) Hi, I just went back and read morbies post on what addicts do and it was another reminder how blessed I am he is not in my life any more.It is so funny how some of us are blessed enough to get out of the relationship and we forget all the sleepless nights the cheating the lieing and the abuse and we tha...	dori	3	613	Jun 22, 2006 by Mobirdie
	A maybe dry, but behaviors still there (Preview) Hello Group, Today is 30 days sober for my A. I can see the challenges he faced this month as well as myself. For me it was my insecurity, my anger, my fear. The behaviors are still there for the A. The anger and rages are not as bad. He has been able to control himself in s...	twinmom2	6	536	Jun 22, 2006 by annmarie
	Missing the A (Preview) I am having a hard day today. My A boyfriend went into a rage on Friday with that I have not seen him since Sunday morning. He came to my house on Saturday night late and he spent the night.. I dropped him off back to his house on sunday. I have not seen him or spoke to him since. My choice, because I have t...	mandalynn38	6	634	Jun 22, 2006 by nycbt
	first f2f (Preview) Finally made it to a al-anon mtg. lotsa nice folks with lotsa encouragements! I plan on it being a weekly stop. Found the books that I've been told about too. I've been told that the alateen in my area will be starting up again so that the kids will have the help that they need to...	Keoki	3	543	Jun 22, 2006 by nycbt
	My Life (Preview) I never thought my life would end up like it is. I always dreamed of being happily married with the house white picket fence, & the kids. Needless to say it didn't end up like that. I met my husband in highschool. I loved him unconditionally. As teenagers we did our share of partying. I never thought h...	heartless39470	5	523	Jun 22, 2006 by iwishuheaven
	Help I'm losing it again (Preview) I'm losing it...and I'd been doing so well. I guess when things are going okay, I think I don't have to work my program...especially the "being good to myself" part, and then it all slides downhill. I looked back over my own posts, and it seems like I have this recording that is broken...isn't t...	Belongtome	10	926	Jun 22, 2006 by Belongtome
	Reflections (Preview) Detachment means not worrying,not judging and not rescuing. Hope ever tells us tomarrow will be better. If we share another's burden,both of us will walk straighter. Just for today I will treat myself gently and nuture the child within. Losers say"I can't"winners say,"I'll t...	angel123	0	404	Jun 22, 2006 by angel123
	AH is dragging me down; nickel and diming me to death (Preview) Just when I start to kind of pull myself together something my AH does comes back to bring me back down. I was starting to feel a little better today after the bad weekend I had. I checked my checking account on-line just now and found four $29 overdraft charges on my account. My money is separate from my...	Lindy	4	1811	Jun 22, 2006 by kitty
	disorganized and unmotivated!!! (Preview) Lately I have been so disorganized. My desk at work seems to always be a mess. I spend too much time on this board and do not seem to get things done the way I used to. I think I am becoming addicted to MIP. At home I do not get things done unless I am "under the gun" so to speak. I am last minute with everything. It...	Gailey	6	639	Jun 22, 2006 by kitty
	Safe in Prison??? (Preview) I'm sorry to say I rarely post here but do read all of your thoughts and experiences and they help me so much. I do go to alanon meetings every week also and am doing my best to work the program and feel better. However, for the past month or so I have been crying every day, even at work and even in...	April306	9	679	Jun 22, 2006 by sarahlm
	my motives (Preview) i want to talk to my ah and tell him that insted of doing whatever it is he is doing he should be with his kids. he had a whole day that he didn't work and he never even called to ask if he could be with our 3 year old. i bet it never even occured to him. i know it didn't. or he sees his son from a prevoius marria...	serendipity	1	549	Jun 21, 2006 by tiredtonite
	Al-Anon meetings? (Preview) I am quite new to Al-Alon and never been to a meeting yet. I ahve a few questions about them I am hoping ypou can answer. 1. Are they for anyone who suffers form A in thier family? i.e. ACoA and spouses, etc... 2. Does it matter where you go I noticed that all the one in my area have differnt names, does t...	iwishuheaven	9	799	Jun 21, 2006 by nycbt
	more mind games (Preview) Hi everyone...more crap for me to vent about.quick history...my active A husband has been gone 7 months.we have 4 children and he gives me no money..infact he has cost me money...credit card bills..income tax debts etc. he has been living with his brother and he finally had enough and left the apt. an...	allison	1	592	Jun 21, 2006 by abbyal
	Lmt, where are you? (Preview) ((((((((((((((((((((((Lmt))))))))))))))))))))), Where are you sweet friend? I miss seeing you! Love and blessings to you and your family! Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty	Karilynn	2	509	Jun 21, 2006 by peewee
	being good to myself (Preview) Today has been tough. Last nite I did a sleep study test. The paper work trigger the past for me. One question asked to underline words that describe yourself. Lazy, no good, deadbeat, on & on for almost a whole paragraph then the descriptions started getting better and more p...	hmrnrnmm	0	407	Jun 21, 2006 by hmrnrnmm
	Leave the pieces when you go--long (Preview) Hi there everybody. I haven't been on in a few weeks. I used to get online at school and well it's closed for the summer, and I mistakenly thought I could handle alone for a few weeks. INSANITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought things were going pretty good. I knew not great, but amazing when you aren't...	hudsond	3	637	Jun 21, 2006 by dori
	Waiting or Holding Ourselves Back? (Preview) Thought I'd share our meeting topic last night: Waiting. Waiting can be a good thing in program, making wise choices when we are not angry and/or impulsive. Waiting on the other hand, well, you know, makes us feel like we are just sinking more into the quicksand.&nb...	wallsal55	2	444	Jun 21, 2006 by dori
	Oh boy it's starting to get ugly around here (Preview) Hello ((((Everyone)))) I haven't talked lately about where I am or what I am doing so here it goes .... I moved back to the house 2 weeks ago, by choice but not for long. I need time to pack and sort, do repairs etc. I found chaos and mayhem. So here I am changing what I can. While I stay here I do...	Jennifer	6	592	Jun 21, 2006 by hudsond
	last 12 hours have been rough (Preview) Last night I got into an aruement with my wife and it it hasn't ended yet. She went out last night and I was at home with our two kids. They really pushed me to the limits when it came to bed time and it took everything I had to stay cool. About 45 minutes after my eldest (2 1/2 years old) went to bed my youngest (1...	iwishuheaven	13	645	Jun 21, 2006 by iwishuheaven
	have you noticed a positive change around here???? (Preview) I have been really busy with baaseball, kids, meetings etc and have only had time to get my online fix by reading and occasionally a quick reply. Today was the last day of school for the summer and I am so looking forward to being able to be a better participant here at MIP. I just wanted to say that...	confused	4	514	Jun 21, 2006 by abbyal
	Affirmation "I pledge Allegeiance" (Preview) Affirmations: ..I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE .. To all the things that are good about me.... And I shall from this day forward, No longer try to be everything to everybody. Nor will I be someone I'm not. I shall no longer use all my energies to fulfill the dreams of others while mine go unattended. I shall use my as...	angel123	2	2604	Jun 21, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Happy Birthday Caroline (Preview) Today is my youngest granddaughter's first birthday, Caroline Olivia - I haven't seen her in over three months. Her mom, Ashley (our daughter) is the one that I saw last week in rehab. Caroline is staying with her other grandparents(Ashley's Mom & Step-Dad) who do no...	Rita G	4	510	Jun 21, 2006 by Dolphin123
	Detachment - What??? (Preview) Am a little bit, no a big bit confused here. Detachemnt to me means not diving a damn. What does it mean to you all. I can detach, shut down, not care...all of those things. I cannot care and detach at the same time. Any thoughts?????? Ty all lilms	lilms	7	581	Jun 21, 2006 by annmarie
	ok so i'm sick, now what ????? (Preview) ok people i get it, i'm sick, but what now ??? see i know i'm sick i feel sick to the bottom of my stomach, and it hurts!!! it hurts so bad and i just want it to stop. so how do i do that ??? problem one i dont know whats wrong only that its very wrong and if you dont know what it is how do you fix it ?? problem two th...	kellyjelly	13	1064	Jun 21, 2006 by nycbt
	How do you know if you are doing better? (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) This is the question I asked myself today. I used to do better when my AW was not raging at me. Period. She starts raging and I flip out. Then everything gets me... work, the kids and their little tragedys, the guy driving like an idiot in front of me...&nb...	rtexas	5	614	Jun 21, 2006 by Rita G
	AH refuses AA; how do I detach? (Preview) My AH says he doesn't need AA and that he "does nothing wrong". I begged and cried for him to change things. I told him he could drink all he wants as long as he's not mean. He says I am the one who is mean. He says all I want to do is change him. I said I don't like to be cut down when he's drunk and I damn sure don't li...	Lindy	10	698	Jun 21, 2006 by Jeannie
	thoink you and smoinks (Preview) I loved all your posts to me. Made me feel better. So please now all of you, get your tents and stuff and kids and dogs and whatever and come camp at Eden and have a pignic with me. love,debilyn	debilyn	2	519	Jun 21, 2006 by Karilynn
	Still stuff left (Preview) Hello. guess it is my turn to share. It is rough right now. Comes a point that a vacation is not a want but a need. I love it here, I love my life. Just need to have a day or two or three to wake up to go back to sleep again. Not feed someone as soon as my feet hit the floor. Doing my best to get my budget goi...	debilyn	14	837	Jun 21, 2006 by Elizabeth M
	JOHN Please answer questions, thanks (Preview) Hi John, I have a question for you as a matter of fact 2 or 3 . Today when I was putting posts on the board, some how my name had a number added to it and couldn't get in. Somehow my password was changed too. Not sure how to get in touch with you. Could you please check into it for me. Also I was in chat...	d53sjurne	2	705	Jun 20, 2006 by John
	blaming myself & feeling guilty (Preview) I noticed something about myself last nite in a meeting with the other caretakers of the elderly man I sit with. I tend to feel like when someone brings up something that is not being done by one of the other caretakers, I immediately think that they are talking about me. It looked like she was look...	hmrnrnmm	3	791	Jun 20, 2006 by Rita G
	Update/Father's Day (Preview) All the stupid cards out there used to drive me absolutely insane. Now that I don't have to get them/ can't get them anymore, I almost miss it. I've done a lot of I dunno what to call it, discovering lately. Everything's been insane, and things have gotten really hard to deal with. Ecspecially being new o...	Miranda	1	451	Jun 20, 2006 by rtexas
	My weakness prevailed (Preview) Dear A- ex I’m sorry I called you, I tried and tried to be strong and my weakness prevailed. I hate myself for calling you, I hate so much now. Why couldn’t I have been stronger and said “you know what AA-X , what make you think I give a Sh*# about you” but no INSTEAD, I helpe...	angelnomore	4	570	Jun 20, 2006 by canadianguy
	New and confused (Preview) I am still new to al-anon and this time around I am really trying to work on me. I came to a few meetings at the end of last year but I did not stick to it. I think I came more for my A than for me. Now I am really ready to work on myself for me and me only. I am going to f2f meetings but there...	LALA1	4	588	Jun 20, 2006 by dori
	Bad movie, lets change the channel (Preview) I made her choose, I did not make her choice! How can she continue to blame me for the terrible choices she made and the impact that they are still having on our entire family? Why can't she see the connection between her drinking and our failing marriage, her blackout...	Keoki	4	605	Jun 20, 2006 by dori
	feeling resentment (Preview) I am getting ready to leave. I have been up since almost 8 am. I have feed all but 8 dogs, we have 29. My A is still in bed. I know she is awake. I still have to unload the truck from our sale saturday. She has not drank since Saturday. I am wondering why we buy groceries at all. My A has told a freind of o...	hmrnrnmm	4	494	Jun 20, 2006 by dori
	When is it time??? (Preview) Yesterday being father's day I conteplated calling my father. I went back and forth with it a few times. Asking myself when I was going to stop chasing the relationship I will never have with him. Does he after all the years of ignoring 2 of his 3 children deserve a phone call w...	AlaMom	6	641	Jun 20, 2006 by marchgrl
	Hello Again (Preview) Hello To All, I am not a new member. In fact, I used to frequent this message board a few years back and I am so glad I have come back. I forgot what it feels like to read these messages and just keep an awareness of myself through your post's. To help if I can and to laugh is what...	marchgrl	5	473	Jun 20, 2006 by marchgrl
	i am not letting ANYONE "time"my recovery (Preview) i am not letting ANYONE "time" my recovery it took a LONG time for me to get this sick....this messed up.....it took a long time and LOTS of trauma and RE-trauma for the candle of hope to damned near blow out for me..... so it isn't gonna be overnight that i recover.... i have...	rosie light shines	6	858	Jun 20, 2006 by Jennifer
	my A is missing (Preview) I have not heard from him in over 24 hours. He was supposed to call last night. How do you get through a day without crying and feeling helpless and depressed? For all I know he's dead. When he does call and tells me he's fine, how do I not get mad at him for not calling? I wan...	jacksmom	6	640	Jun 20, 2006 by Mimi
	dealing with difficult negative people? (Preview) ok I get the no gossip , no criticism, no sarcasm but what if everyone you come in contact with doesn't. I can already forcast what they are going to say. I have several in my life who are into gossip, criticism etc. I see this as negative. No I can not just avoid these people. I find myself with less an...	hmrnrnmm	5	959	Jun 19, 2006 by mebjk
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.