Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

canadianguy · canadianguy

Please folks... let'd do our best to share E,S, & H with each other, talk about our experiences, what may have worked (or not worked) for us in similar situations.... but please, please, please stop short of advising people whether or not they should stay or go in their relationships with the...

arty · arty

My A feels like his life is spiralling out of control. I kicked him out 9 weeks ago after a 2 week drinking binge. The day after he moved out i warned him that if he doesnt get his act together i will cancel the wedding. So for the next 3 weeks we spoke everyday, and each day he told me he doent want to quit. So i c...

debo · debo

Well it is true what they say in Alanon about let go and let God. I am not sure if anyone had seen my previous post but I was at wits end. I finally had to turn everything in my life over to my Higher Power. I have been praying for answers as I love my husband but he has become a different person since drinking...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Just a little hope for all. I had been chatting with a guy I have never talked to or met online for the past week or two and yesterday he sent me a dozen roses, a bear and a box of candy delivered to my work and called me when I got home (first time I heard his voice). NOW cynicism. I question every word that c...

jajanma · jajanma

Today is a new day. Today I will be happy for what I have....beautiful children, beautiful grandchildren. A nice apartment. New friends that are fun to be with. Old friends that are always there, no matter how long I have been out of touch. My health. No gray hair yet. ( Well, maybe one, but its a pretty se...

Alanoner · Alanoner

I cringe when I hear that 'Most of us suffer from low self-esteem," "most of us are attracted to alcoholics again and again," "most of us were abused during childhood." Do "most of us" really come out of the same box? Of course not! I dare say there is no stati...

meagain · meagain

I ask myself all the time-why do I stress so much about certain things--things I cannot control?? Do other people do this? Is it because we want our lives to be problem free? No one has a problem free life. I guess I have sooo become a people pleaser, perhaps living in the past with a A brother and A X hubby...

arty · arty

im not so sure on how to cope with this one... thanks mobirdie for your post... now i need to hear from more people. My a is sober for now, but is extremely depressed. he doesnt tell me he wants to hurt himself, but i can just hear it in his voice. i keep reassuring him that we can eventually work things out for...

jaja · jaja

Both my A and I are involved in program (fairly new to it having bounced back and forth with it for a long time). We have never talked about how we each may interpret any of the steps, etc. and we are just at the beginnings of truly being involved in our own recoveries and leave each to his own with ea...

Maria123 · Maria123

I love birthdays !!!!!!!!!! (everyone else's that is).

Today is our lovely and talented

LAUREN ASHLEY'S birthday Happy Birthday Sweetheart

Hope you have a wonderful day.

Love ya, Maria

angel123 · angel123

Looking thru my books ,I found this in one of my pages, it was written in Alanon news letter 1979 Twelve Rewards To The Twelve Steps 1.HOPE instead of desperation. 2.FAITH instead of despair. 3.C OURAGE instead of fear. 4.PEACE OF MIND instead of confusion. 5.SELF-RESPECT instead of contempt. 6.SEL...

Fifi · Fifi

in the midst of all this just got breast cancer diagnosis....trying to stay calm, make informed decisions, rely on my wonderful support network. feel like life has just got it out to beat me down till there is no where lower to go. love, fifi

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear Roomies: I grew resentful tonight over a small incident, and it has lead to the beginning of some fruitful growth on my part that I would like to share. Earlier this evening, I called a friend who was unable to talk and asked to call me back later this evening because it wasn't a good time for her...

vriebe · vriebe

I am having such a difficult time w/ my son, who's 22, has had 2 dui's prior to 21 years old. He's "trying" to get his life on track according to him, but he won't admit he even has a drinking problem. Yesterday, clear cut rules, he can stay over, but there's absolutely...

theprofessor · theprofessor

Last night, I went to the counselor with my AH. It was pretty disastrous for me, though my AH seemed pretty happy about the whole thing. I feel like he is attempting to hide things from her, and he won't assume ownership of his actions, his behavior, and their impact on our relationship. We attem...

Rora · Rora

More and more as I learn about Al-anon, visit this board and go to face2face mtg's, the consistent message is that this is about ME. Although I have feelings about what my Ah is doing or not doing, what I do is what I can control. Some things I am learning: Not only in my relationship with my husband, bu...

minnie · minnie

My ah actually said that to me! He keeps telling me how he wants to quit and he's not doing very well with quitting and he wishes there was a pill or gum or something like that to help him. And I was like, "GO TO AA! GET A SPONSOR!! START SOME SORT OF PROGRAM!! Sometime I just want to strangle that man!

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Just an update for anyone who's interested. I DID go to court on Friday and had the restraining order made permanent. It was a horrible ordeal. He didn't show up thank god but I was first and had to testify in front of a courtroom full of people (small town) about what had transpired. How emb...

HELPLESSMOM · HELPLESSMOM

i need someone that has gone thru this to tell me what i am doing wrong or if what i have been doing is right i don't have clue and i have no family to help me and my husband is almost just gave up and my 19 yr old daughter has just had it with him.

Kim65 · Kim65

I'm having a lot of fear here, and can't get a grasp on the thought I'm having that's causing it (if you know what I mean). AH relapsed et al over the last year (second relapse with him in seven years), and I kicked him out in January. He's been living with the guy who set up the AA meet...

Phil · Phil

I've been on this site since it started many moons ago..my name is Phil..and I'm a recovering alcoholic.. As an added bonus I've also been a member of Alanon...for a great length of time also... I dont share on this board much.... There are a different set of guidelines set down...so.......

vriebe · vriebe

I am having such a difficult time w/ my son, who's 22, has had 2 dui's prior to 21 years old. He's "trying" to get his life on track according to him, but he won't admit he even has a drinking problem. Yesterday, clear cut rules, he can stay over, but there's absolutely...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

This whole thing with my dil has just left me feeling helpless and hopeless. I can't control her using my grandaughters as pawns in trying to force my son to sign divorce papers that have stipulations that are unreasonable. I am so angry that she is keeping my grandchildren away from me just beca...

debo · debo

Something that really helped me put things in perspective this past week was to write down the Serenity Prayer like this....................... God, Grant me the SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CAN NOT CHANGE....... That Garry is an alcoholic. That I can not make him STOP DRINKING. That Garry does n...

marty · marty

I have learn last night i went to a f2f meeting i felt out of place but listen to every one who talk because i know i got a problem and it ME my best thinking got me here and i realize i need to work on my self more than ever,but for your help i would had been more nerves than i have been, i just started and i got a long...

Rora · Rora

-- Edited by Rora at 06:05, 2007-03-07

akristab · akristab

HBO is premiering a documentary series on addiction http://www.hbo.com/addiction/ during their FREE preview March 15-18. For those of us that have a loved one that battles addiction, it may help us understand it a little better. If you cannot watch the series http://www.hbo.com/addiction/the...

marmare · marmare

The numbers came out for the month of February!!!! Out of 8 showrooms I MADE #1 IN SALES!!!! My net sales for the month 45,000!!!! I have only been there for 90 days!!! I LOVE MY JOB!!!!! Thank you so much for all your support here! You guys are my extended family, good or bad times of my life I have to fill yo...

jaja · jaja

For the most part my A and I have been getting along since separating 6 mos. ago. Him even staying here for a while during the last 6 weeks. It's been all good. But a week ago he got real pissed at me to my reaction over something trivial ( I back offed off taking money from him because he was so ups...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Hello just wanted to quickly let you all know I am home from the hospital. I had my hyserectomy--they took out only one ovary--it was at least as big as a tennis ball--Fibroma tumor, non cancerous. In pain, alone, and still dealing with my A, who is struggling to make ends meet at a sh***y motel up the road...

theprofessor · theprofessor

This just came back to me, I can't believe I didn't mention this earlier! During our session, my AH told the therapist that we had a fight, and he told me to find a new place to live (all true). Then he tells her it wasn't difficult for him, that he could easily end our relationship without a...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

Part of a reccomended ALA activity, write a couple paragraphs about the person and what you would change if you could. I would make the A happier. My A is not a happy camper, drinking or not. Sometimes the tension just ripples off of him and on to everyone else around. I've put in some serious effort i...

rtexas · rtexas

Hello ((((Everyone)))) "There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle." Albert Einstein (1879-1955) I recieved this quote in an email from my sponsor yesterday. You know, just the very existance of this program...

Barbs45 · Barbs45

Haven't posted for a while, as I still have reservations about this. I understand that not all alcoholics are peodophilles, or vice versa. My exhusband, now dead was both, in my opinion the fact that he was also a peodophile only made it more difficult for him to recover from alcoholism. As for be...

Ragmoll · Ragmoll

Hello Everyone, I am new to this group. I am chairing a meeting tonight and was wondering if anyone could direct me to information about - acceptance. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you in Advance. Mary

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

These past few weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions for me but amidst it all I can see that the program is working miracles in my life. My sister addicted to opiates, went to detox and is attending meetings every day, she is a new person. However, I have found myself relating to her differently t...

theprofessor · theprofessor

This just came back to me, I can't believe I didn't mention this earlier! During our session, my AH told the therapist that we had a fight, and he told me to find a new place to live (all true). Then he tells her it wasn't difficult for him, that he could easily end our relationship without a...

MsgBo · MsgBo

My oldest grandson attempted suicide last night. Prayers would be appreciated. Bill

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

In order to grow you need to be sincere and honest with yourself. You are like anybody else neither better nor worse, just a human being. Your sincerity and your will to be true are the key elements to your realization. Unknown Freud spent years of his research (and who knows how much cocaine!) trying t...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Hello just wanted to quickly let you all know I am home from the hospital. I had my hyserectomy--they took out only one ovary--it was at least as big as a tennis ball--Fibroma tumor, non cancerous. In pain, alone, and still dealing with my A, who is struggling to make ends meet at a sh***y motel up the road...

minnie · minnie

I am so tired of my ah thinking I am a complete moron. Today I figured out where his hiding place is. I hate myself for caring, or looking for it even. Well I saw him go outside today with his coat, thinking he was going to feed the dog or something, and he comes in with a bulk in his pocket which he was holding fr...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I took my kids last weekend to stay the night with a lady i know thru work. She is also from out of state and her grandkids don't come often. We talked for a while about her being a surrogate grandma for my kids becuase we have no one here either. Anyway, they loved eachother everything went great an...

akristab · akristab

HBO is premiering a documentary series on addiction http://www.hbo.com/addiction/ during their FREE preview March 15-18. For those of us that have a loved one that battles addiction, it may help us understand it a little better. If you cannot watch the series http://www.hbo.com/addiction/the...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I thought perhaps some of you might be interested in seeing this gem. It is the 54 year Sobriety Medallion presented to Geneva Vessels. Her grandson gave it to us yesterday. I was not priviledged to know this awesome lady but her sobriety date is Jan 10, 1944. Miss Geneva passed away a few years ago b...

serendipity · serendipity

I know I didn't Cause it I can't Control it I can't Cure it I have heard in meetings that I can Contribute to the disease and I can Care. These were huge for me.Seeing my part in the family disease finally gave me something I could actually do about it. W...

mama_nz · mama_nz

Well I think my A got a bit of a wake-up call seeing me with someone else recently. He showed up at my place today saying he felt like his heart had been ripped out and that he wanted to stop drinking if it meant he could have his family back (meaning me and our son).. However he said after seeing me at the park...

jrtjosey · jrtjosey

I just want to let you all know that a relationship can be maintained with your ex. I have set boundaries as before. I only speak with him during the day, when I know he his sober. We still support the boys together at sporting events, some people probably don't even know we are divorced, LOL. When th...

rtexas · rtexas

Hello ((((Everyone)))) "There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle." Albert Einstein (1879-1955) I recieved this quote in an email from my sponsor yesterday. You know, just the very existance of this program...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

My A son is in a diversion center trying to get his life straightened out. Him and his wife are going thru a divorce because of my sons drug and alcohol problems. Well my dil called me last night and she said that because my son will not sign the divorce papers and because he will not be paying child-suppo...

Scigirl · Scigirl

This is my first time participating in this forum. Where to start?! I am married to an alcoholic. He seems like the ideal husband and father most of the time but every once in a while he goes on a binge. Last night he took off after I fell asleep and hasn't been home since (24 hrs). He won't an...

Rora · Rora

Yesterday was mine and Ah's 5th anniversary. I was worked up to have a horrible day. We were getting together to discuss things. I had to speak to my sponsor before he arrived, who shot it to me plain and simple... "Your attitude stinks and you've decided to have a horrible day with your A....

maresie2 · maresie2

One of my latest key insights is that the A crashes from fantasy about as much as he crashes from alcohol. Right now he has a huge fantasy about doing a geographic. I am trying to get out of his way as much as possible. I am tired of taking the heat and blame when his fantasy crashes. So he is either catatonic...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((((everyone)))))))))))))))))) Well, I have been missing from here for almost three weeks.... And I have missed you guys so much... I'm not in any better shape than when I left here. It's been five weeks since my relationship ended, and I'm still in a daze. I am still cryi...

theprofessor · theprofessor

My AH and I, we have marriage counseling this week. I am dreading going, mainly because he's been brooding over my latest actions for the latter part of the week, and I know I am going to look like a complete a**hole in our session today. I finally got really fed up last week, this time over the woman w...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I was angry with my friend: I told my wrath, my wrath did end. I was angry with my foe: I told it not, my wrath did grow. --William Blake We have a right to claim our own feelings. Sometimes we get angry, but hold it inside because we think it's wrong to feel it. If anger builds inside us, it expands like a b...

Alyce · Alyce

From childhood I grew up in a house where I was taught not show feelings (only happy ones). Anyway, when my mother passed away and I started to cry she said "Don't cry" and I just stuffed the feelings. I realized I never really grieved my mother's death, just went about business. ...

maire rua · maire rua

I am feeling really down right now, today my ex-A who had been living with me for the last two months but left last sunday, progressed to a new level for him, drinking during the day in order to play darts properly. I know I should not be surprised or disappointed that drinking comes before his family and o...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

I started thinking about this. I have waited eight years for my ah to change his way and to become sober...........and then once sober to not become a dry drunk.......well he's done both. So now he's sober (again) and I got to thinking, if this is for real......how will I ever know? Will I keep l...

virjennyan · virjennyan

I have 1 sibling - a brother who has been in recovery a short time. I have recently learned to "let go", and am still working on it. For me, letting go means no longer having any expectations, and no longer reaching out. I have always been the one to initiate contact with him, except when he w...

lam0204 · lam0204

Has anyone had any experiences with interventions? I was told it may be helpful with my ex husband who is an alcoholic. I would like to hear some input on them because I know they don't always work. thanks.

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Stay vs. Leave, Giving Advice, etc. (Preview) Please folks... let'd do our best to share E,S, & H with each other, talk about our experiences, what may have worked (or not worked) for us in similar situations.... but please, please, please stop short of advising people whether or not they should stay or go in their relationships with the...	canadianguy	28	1160	Mar 9, 2007 by AndiLynn
	This is WAY too hard (Preview) My A feels like his life is spiralling out of control. I kicked him out 9 weeks ago after a 2 week drinking binge. The day after he moved out i warned him that if he doesnt get his act together i will cancel the wedding. So for the next 3 weeks we spoke everyday, and each day he told me he doent want to quit. So i c...	arty	12	536	Mar 9, 2007 by AndiLynn
	Husband is 18 DAYS SOBER and EXHAUSTED (Preview) Well it is true what they say in Alanon about let go and let God. I am not sure if anyone had seen my previous post but I was at wits end. I finally had to turn everything in my life over to my Higher Power. I have been praying for answers as I love my husband but he has become a different person since drinking...	debo	8	1217	Mar 9, 2007 by AndiLynn
	Hope and Cynicism (Preview) Just a little hope for all. I had been chatting with a guy I have never talked to or met online for the past week or two and yesterday he sent me a dozen roses, a bear and a box of candy delivered to my work and called me when I got home (first time I heard his voice). NOW cynicism. I question every word that c...	carolinagirl	7	629	Mar 9, 2007 by AndiLynn
	Today (Preview) Today is a new day. Today I will be happy for what I have....beautiful children, beautiful grandchildren. A nice apartment. New friends that are fun to be with. Old friends that are always there, no matter how long I have been out of touch. My health. No gray hair yet. ( Well, maybe one, but its a pretty se...	jajanma	3	416	Mar 9, 2007 by jajanma
	Cookie Cutter People (Preview) I cringe when I hear that 'Most of us suffer from low self-esteem," "most of us are attracted to alcoholics again and again," "most of us were abused during childhood." Do "most of us" really come out of the same box? Of course not! I dare say there is no stati...	Alanoner	8	686	Mar 9, 2007 by AndiLynn
	so much anxiety (Preview) I ask myself all the time-why do I stress so much about certain things--things I cannot control?? Do other people do this? Is it because we want our lives to be problem free? No one has a problem free life. I guess I have sooo become a people pleaser, perhaps living in the past with a A brother and A X hubby...	meagain	8	730	Mar 9, 2007 by maresie2
	he is SO depressed (Preview) im not so sure on how to cope with this one... thanks mobirdie for your post... now i need to hear from more people. My a is sober for now, but is extremely depressed. he doesnt tell me he wants to hurt himself, but i can just hear it in his voice. i keep reassuring him that we can eventually work things out for...	arty	7	598	Mar 9, 2007 by Diva
	Is discussing program with A appropriate? (Preview) Both my A and I are involved in program (fairly new to it having bounced back and forth with it for a long time). We have never talked about how we each may interpret any of the steps, etc. and we are just at the beginnings of truly being involved in our own recoveries and leave each to his own with ea...	jaja	7	797	Mar 8, 2007 by abbyal
	BIRTHDAY GIRL (Preview) I love birthdays !!!!!!!!!! (everyone else's that is). Today is our lovely and talented LAUREN ASHLEY'S birthday Happy Birthday Sweetheart Hope you have a wonderful day. Love ya, Maria	Maria123	11	560	Mar 8, 2007 by tea2
	TWELVE REWARDS TO TWELVE STEPS (Preview) Looking thru my books ,I found this in one of my pages, it was written in Alanon news letter 1979 Twelve Rewards To The Twelve Steps 1.HOPE instead of desperation. 2.FAITH instead of despair. 3.C OURAGE instead of fear. 4.PEACE OF MIND instead of confusion. 5.SELF-RESPECT instead of contempt. 6.SEL...	angel123	2	2407	Mar 8, 2007 by tea2
	prayers (Preview) in the midst of all this just got breast cancer diagnosis....trying to stay calm, make informed decisions, rely on my wonderful support network. feel like life has just got it out to beat me down till there is no where lower to go. love, fifi	Fifi	12	604	Mar 8, 2007 by Karilynn
	SUFFERING IN SILENCE! (Preview) Dear Roomies: I grew resentful tonight over a small incident, and it has lead to the beginning of some fruitful growth on my part that I would like to share. Earlier this evening, I called a friend who was unable to talk and asked to call me back later this evening because it wasn't a good time for her...	BlueCloud	6	620	Mar 8, 2007 by eva
	Adult Child A (Preview) I am having such a difficult time w/ my son, who's 22, has had 2 dui's prior to 21 years old. He's "trying" to get his life on track according to him, but he won't admit he even has a drinking problem. Yesterday, clear cut rules, he can stay over, but there's absolutely...	vriebe	5	577	Mar 8, 2007 by mel123
	Marriage Counseling Session (Preview) Last night, I went to the counselor with my AH. It was pretty disastrous for me, though my AH seemed pretty happy about the whole thing. I feel like he is attempting to hide things from her, and he won't assume ownership of his actions, his behavior, and their impact on our relationship. We attem...	theprofessor	6	595	Mar 8, 2007 by mama_nz
	This is about ME... (Preview) More and more as I learn about Al-anon, visit this board and go to face2face mtg's, the consistent message is that this is about ME. Although I have feelings about what my Ah is doing or not doing, what I do is what I can control. Some things I am learning: Not only in my relationship with my husband, bu...	Rora	4	429	Mar 8, 2007 by mama_nz
	wish there was a stop-drinking pill or gum (Preview) My ah actually said that to me! He keeps telling me how he wants to quit and he's not doing very well with quitting and he wishes there was a pill or gum or something like that to help him. And I was like, "GO TO AA! GET A SPONSOR!! START SOME SORT OF PROGRAM!! Sometime I just want to strangle that man!	minnie	8	772	Mar 7, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Went to court on Friday (Preview) Just an update for anyone who's interested. I DID go to court on Friday and had the restraining order made permanent. It was a horrible ordeal. He didn't show up thank god but I was first and had to testify in front of a courtroom full of people (small town) about what had transpired. How emb...	carolinagirl	4	602	Mar 7, 2007 by maresie2
	my 22 yr old son is an alcholic i need advice (Preview) i need someone that has gone thru this to tell me what i am doing wrong or if what i have been doing is right i don't have clue and i have no family to help me and my husband is almost just gave up and my 19 yr old daughter has just had it with him.	HELPLESSMOM	11	710	Mar 7, 2007 by maresie2
	Bullies and boundaries (Preview) I'm having a lot of fear here, and can't get a grasp on the thought I'm having that's causing it (if you know what I mean). AH relapsed et al over the last year (second relapse with him in seven years), and I kicked him out in January. He's been living with the guy who set up the AA meet...	Kim65	6	694	Mar 7, 2007 by Kim65
	Also...A Canadian Guy..:) (Preview) I've been on this site since it started many moons ago..my name is Phil..and I'm a recovering alcoholic.. As an added bonus I've also been a member of Alanon...for a great length of time also... I dont share on this board much.... There are a different set of guidelines set down...so.......	Phil	14	772	Mar 7, 2007 by RainyJamie
	Adult Child A (Preview) I am having such a difficult time w/ my son, who's 22, has had 2 dui's prior to 21 years old. He's "trying" to get his life on track according to him, but he won't admit he even has a drinking problem. Yesterday, clear cut rules, he can stay over, but there's absolutely...	vriebe	0	436	Mar 7, 2007 by vriebe
	I feel so angry and helpless (Preview) This whole thing with my dil has just left me feeling helpless and hopeless. I can't control her using my grandaughters as pawns in trying to force my son to sign divorce papers that have stipulations that are unreasonable. I am so angry that she is keeping my grandchildren away from me just beca...	JulieLynn	3	803	Mar 7, 2007 by BlueCloud
	Something that Really Helped me (Preview) Something that really helped me put things in perspective this past week was to write down the Serenity Prayer like this....................... God, Grant me the SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CAN NOT CHANGE....... That Garry is an alcoholic. That I can not make him STOP DRINKING. That Garry does n...	debo	1	512	Mar 7, 2007 by Lunamoth
	this is a good program (Preview) I have learn last night i went to a f2f meeting i felt out of place but listen to every one who talk because i know i got a problem and it ME my best thinking got me here and i realize i need to work on my self more than ever,but for your help i would had been more nerves than i have been, i just started and i got a long...	marty	2	506	Mar 7, 2007 by david62
	This is about ME... (Preview) -- Edited by Rora at 06:05, 2007-03-07	Rora	0	447	Mar 7, 2007 by Rora
	The Addiction Project (Preview) HBO is premiering a documentary series on addiction http://www.hbo.com/addiction/ during their FREE preview March 15-18. For those of us that have a loved one that battles addiction, it may help us understand it a little better. If you cannot watch the series http://www.hbo.com/addiction/the...	akristab	8	576	Mar 7, 2007 by virjennyan
	Work update (Preview) The numbers came out for the month of February!!!! Out of 8 showrooms I MADE #1 IN SALES!!!! My net sales for the month 45,000!!!! I have only been there for 90 days!!! I LOVE MY JOB!!!!! Thank you so much for all your support here! You guys are my extended family, good or bad times of my life I have to fill yo...	marmare	5	444	Mar 7, 2007 by nmike
	Aren't we allowed to make communication mistakes in A relationships(for cryin' out loud!) (Preview) For the most part my A and I have been getting along since separating 6 mos. ago. Him even staying here for a while during the last 6 weeks. It's been all good. But a week ago he got real pissed at me to my reaction over something trivial ( I back offed off taking money from him because he was so ups...	jaja	4	549	Mar 7, 2007 by nmike
	back from the hospital and home alone (Preview) Hello just wanted to quickly let you all know I am home from the hospital. I had my hyserectomy--they took out only one ovary--it was at least as big as a tennis ball--Fibroma tumor, non cancerous. In pain, alone, and still dealing with my A, who is struggling to make ends meet at a sh***y motel up the road...	hippietrippiechick	9	641	Mar 6, 2007 by hippietrippiechick
	And Another Thing = from the session (Preview) This just came back to me, I can't believe I didn't mention this earlier! During our session, my AH told the therapist that we had a fight, and he told me to find a new place to live (all true). Then he tells her it wasn't difficult for him, that he could easily end our relationship without a...	theprofessor	1	486	Mar 6, 2007 by irish54
	Someone I worry about and wish I could change (Preview) Part of a reccomended ALA activity, write a couple paragraphs about the person and what you would change if you could. I would make the A happier. My A is not a happy camper, drinking or not. Sometimes the tension just ripples off of him and on to everyone else around. I've put in some serious effort i...	RainyJamie	4	575	Mar 6, 2007 by RainyJamie
	There are 2 ways to live your life... (Preview) Hello ((((Everyone)))) "There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle." Albert Einstein (1879-1955) I recieved this quote in an email from my sponsor yesterday. You know, just the very existance of this program...	rtexas	1	486	Mar 6, 2007 by hersh
	The One Thing That Prevented His Recovery? (Preview) Haven't posted for a while, as I still have reservations about this. I understand that not all alcoholics are peodophilles, or vice versa. My exhusband, now dead was both, in my opinion the fact that he was also a peodophile only made it more difficult for him to recover from alcoholism. As for be...	Barbs45	7	529	Mar 6, 2007 by Barbs45
	Need Help Please (Preview) Hello Everyone, I am new to this group. I am chairing a meeting tonight and was wondering if anyone could direct me to information about - acceptance. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you in Advance. Mary	Ragmoll	3	524	Mar 6, 2007 by abbyal
	my program is working (Preview) These past few weeks have been a roller coaster of emotions for me but amidst it all I can see that the program is working miracles in my life. My sister addicted to opiates, went to detox and is attending meetings every day, she is a new person. However, I have found myself relating to her differently t...	Mobirdie	3	459	Mar 6, 2007 by Rita G
	And Another Thing = from the session (Preview) This just came back to me, I can't believe I didn't mention this earlier! During our session, my AH told the therapist that we had a fight, and he told me to find a new place to live (all true). Then he tells her it wasn't difficult for him, that he could easily end our relationship without a...	theprofessor	4	632	Mar 6, 2007 by twinmom2
	prayers for grandson (Preview) My oldest grandson attempted suicide last night. Prayers would be appreciated. Bill	MsgBo	12	541	Mar 6, 2007 by MsgBo
	The authentic self (Preview) In order to grow you need to be sincere and honest with yourself. You are like anybody else neither better nor worse, just a human being. Your sincerity and your will to be true are the key elements to your realization. Unknown Freud spent years of his research (and who knows how much cocaine!) trying t...	Tiger2006	1	465	Mar 6, 2007 by ally
	back from the hospital and home alone (Preview) Hello just wanted to quickly let you all know I am home from the hospital. I had my hyserectomy--they took out only one ovary--it was at least as big as a tennis ball--Fibroma tumor, non cancerous. In pain, alone, and still dealing with my A, who is struggling to make ends meet at a sh***y motel up the road...	hippietrippiechick	3	541	Mar 6, 2007 by aunitedway
	he thinks i'm stupid (Preview) I am so tired of my ah thinking I am a complete moron. Today I figured out where his hiding place is. I hate myself for caring, or looking for it even. Well I saw him go outside today with his coat, thinking he was going to feed the dog or something, and he comes in with a bulk in his pocket which he was holding fr...	minnie	6	540	Mar 6, 2007 by aunitedway
	Resourcefulness (Preview) I took my kids last weekend to stay the night with a lady i know thru work. She is also from out of state and her grandkids don't come often. We talked for a while about her being a surrogate grandma for my kids becuase we have no one here either. Anyway, they loved eachother everything went great an...	carolinagirl	4	603	Mar 6, 2007 by Friendofyours
	The Addiction Project (Preview) HBO is premiering a documentary series on addiction http://www.hbo.com/addiction/ during their FREE preview March 15-18. For those of us that have a loved one that battles addiction, it may help us understand it a little better. If you cannot watch the series http://www.hbo.com/addiction/the...	akristab	0	335	Mar 6, 2007 by akristab
	54 year sobriety medallion (Preview) I thought perhaps some of you might be interested in seeing this gem. It is the 54 year Sobriety Medallion presented to Geneva Vessels. Her grandson gave it to us yesterday. I was not priviledged to know this awesome lady but her sobriety date is Jan 10, 1944. Miss Geneva passed away a few years ago b...	Mobirdie	2	736	Mar 6, 2007 by hudsond
	any more C's ? (Preview) I know I didn't Cause it I can't Control it I can't Cure it I have heard in meetings that I can Contribute to the disease and I can Care. These were huge for me.Seeing my part in the family disease finally gave me something I could actually do about it. W...	serendipity	9	583	Mar 6, 2007 by lilms
	How much contact to have with a recovering A (Preview) Well I think my A got a bit of a wake-up call seeing me with someone else recently. He showed up at my place today saying he felt like his heart had been ripped out and that he wanted to stop drinking if it meant he could have his family back (meaning me and our son).. However he said after seeing me at the park...	mama_nz	5	904	Mar 6, 2007 by HowToSaveALife
	For all who have an ex AH (Preview) I just want to let you all know that a relationship can be maintained with your ex. I have set boundaries as before. I only speak with him during the day, when I know he his sober. We still support the boys together at sporting events, some people probably don't even know we are divorced, LOL. When th...	jrtjosey	8	738	Mar 6, 2007 by Feather
	There are 2 ways to live your life... (Preview) Hello ((((Everyone)))) "There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle." Albert Einstein (1879-1955) I recieved this quote in an email from my sponsor yesterday. You know, just the very existance of this program...	rtexas	5	608	Mar 6, 2007 by annmarie
	I've been up all night crying (Preview) My A son is in a diversion center trying to get his life straightened out. Him and his wife are going thru a divorce because of my sons drug and alcohol problems. Well my dil called me last night and she said that because my son will not sign the divorce papers and because he will not be paying child-suppo...	JulieLynn	8	841	Mar 5, 2007 by jrtjosey
	Reality Bites!! (Preview) This is my first time participating in this forum. Where to start?! I am married to an alcoholic. He seems like the ideal husband and father most of the time but every once in a while he goes on a binge. Last night he took off after I fell asleep and hasn't been home since (24 hrs). He won't an...	Scigirl	5	446	Mar 5, 2007 by Scigirl
	My attitude stinks... (Preview) Yesterday was mine and Ah's 5th anniversary. I was worked up to have a horrible day. We were getting together to discuss things. I had to speak to my sponsor before he arrived, who shot it to me plain and simple... "Your attitude stinks and you've decided to have a horrible day with your A....	Rora	7	697	Mar 5, 2007 by jrtjosey
	moving along (Preview) One of my latest key insights is that the A crashes from fantasy about as much as he crashes from alcohol. Right now he has a huge fantasy about doing a geographic. I am trying to get out of his way as much as possible. I am tired of taking the heat and blame when his fantasy crashes. So he is either catatonic...	maresie2	2	440	Mar 5, 2007 by Rita G
	GLAD TO BE BACK AGAIN (Preview) (((((((((((((((((everyone)))))))))))))))))) Well, I have been missing from here for almost three weeks.... And I have missed you guys so much... I'm not in any better shape than when I left here. It's been five weeks since my relationship ended, and I'm still in a daze. I am still cryi...	ally	10	761	Mar 5, 2007 by ally
	an average weekend after a disastrous week (Preview) My AH and I, we have marriage counseling this week. I am dreading going, mainly because he's been brooding over my latest actions for the latter part of the week, and I know I am going to look like a complete a**hole in our session today. I finally got really fed up last week, this time over the woman w...	theprofessor	2	519	Mar 5, 2007 by carolinagirl
	release the anger! (Preview) I was angry with my friend: I told my wrath, my wrath did end. I was angry with my foe: I told it not, my wrath did grow. --William Blake We have a right to claim our own feelings. Sometimes we get angry, but hold it inside because we think it's wrong to feel it. If anger builds inside us, it expands like a b...	Tiger2006	4	591	Mar 5, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	Feelings (Preview) From childhood I grew up in a house where I was taught not show feelings (only happy ones). Anyway, when my mother passed away and I started to cry she said "Don't cry" and I just stuffed the feelings. I realized I never really grieved my mother's death, just went about business. ...	Alyce	4	565	Mar 5, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	Progressive disease reminder (Preview) I am feeling really down right now, today my ex-A who had been living with me for the last two months but left last sunday, progressed to a new level for him, drinking during the day in order to play darts properly. I know I should not be surprised or disappointed that drinking comes before his family and o...	maire rua	7	620	Mar 5, 2007 by babysteps
	When sobriety happens............... (Preview) I started thinking about this. I have waited eight years for my ah to change his way and to become sober...........and then once sober to not become a dry drunk.......well he's done both. So now he's sober (again) and I got to thinking, if this is for real......how will I ever know? Will I keep l...	Friendofyours	12	744	Mar 5, 2007 by Karilynn
	No longer reaching out (Preview) I have 1 sibling - a brother who has been in recovery a short time. I have recently learned to "let go", and am still working on it. For me, letting go means no longer having any expectations, and no longer reaching out. I have always been the one to initiate contact with him, except when he w...	virjennyan	2	488	Mar 5, 2007 by virjennyan
	intervention? (Preview) Has anyone had any experiences with interventions? I was told it may be helpful with my ex husband who is an alcoholic. I would like to hear some input on them because I know they don't always work. thanks.	lam0204	8	808	Mar 5, 2007 by virjennyan
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.