Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

I only post to complain about the A and sometimes when I don't have anything to complain about I remember something from way back and bring it up. This is not good, I know that. Probably stems from some sort of codependant something or another, and I want to refresh a little. I want to say that my AH has...

Katy · Katy

Ok my storey so far , hubby in aa but not working any programme, thinks putting the drink down is suffice, now replacing drinking with working 24/7 and woe betide anyone that questions his motives, how dare we, so he's decided to work himself to a frazzle, so now we have a highly stressed human bein...

maresie2 · maresie2

One of the A's favorite retorts is that he is going to up and leave. I never really took it seriously. Turns out in some of his little excursions that last 3 days or so like when he runs out and leaves and doesn't come back for days he has been going to see family who live like 2 hours away from here. ...

Rebecca · Rebecca

hey family i haven't posted in a while. im up the walls busy with work and play ..lol.. im very proud of myself.... i just realised that in the last number of weeks. there was a time when all i cud think about was my "A" and HIS life... HIS choices... and MY pain... they HE caused.. or that I...

ditto · ditto

Twenty years ago I met my very good friend. The first time she and her husband came to my house for dinner, they raided my liquor cabinet and got drunk. The second time they came to my house, they brought their own alcohol and got drunk. The third time they came to my house I set my boundaries. I told the...

bobump · bobump

I'm hoping to make it. Still up in the air but hoping to. Drop me a line. Would be great to put a face w/ the name or say hi to those I've met ! Bob

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I do believe I've lost it for good now. I mean, for good for good. See the puff of smoke? That was my sanity. Wave bye bye! Some of you know, or remember, or something like that, that I petitioned the university based on a psych eval that it turned up I had ADD (Is anyone surprised at my lack of attentio...

Maria123 · Maria123

For those of you who remember Cloud, she's due to have the baby anyday now. Having some "typical" pre-birth symptoms. Looking for some prayers. I'll keep you posted when she delivers. Maria

IceLady · IceLady

I am on my first step now, how do I know if I can moove on to step 2?

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

"So waddya gonna do about it?" That was the quote that stood out to me from my post yesterday. No matter how many positive things were said, I zoom in on the one negative thing. Like any "good little ACA," I take on the attitude of Bob the Builder, "Can I fix it? Yes I can!&quo...

kerry5 · kerry5

Thought i would share here also my service experience in alanon face to face and here at Mip. When i entered alanon in person in 1999, I jumped into service right away after a few weeks. I started with getting there early setting up the tables and making coffee, then greeted the newcomers, then i eventua...

Jayda · Jayda

It's been a long time since I've been here, and things still aren't any better with my brother. Still lots of ups and downs. But now my husband has left me and I am hurting so bad. He said he needs some time to think and be alone. Please pray for us to recover from this and to be together again. I d...

carol · carol

My husband is my alcoholic. He is very sick. He is sober for a few weeks sometimes, then he starts drinking again ( about 120 ounces in 3 days) & then he is violently ill, vomiting, ketoacidosis( diabetic) and heart problems. I get him into the hospital and he is usually good for a couple of weeks...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Ok so my mil tells me yesterday AH has a new job and needs this and that and I tell her he can kiss my @$$ . But she sends me these emails that he's been sending her and he sounds so not him, resigned I guess would be the right word. Still talking about how much he loves me etc. The new job is $20 an hr (dam...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((MIP Group))) Living my life for me has not been easy. In the last couple of weeks I've given some real thought about my life, the present circumstances, and what I want my future to look like. I know what I don't want. I don't want to be managing another person's emotions when I&#...

Lanchas · Lanchas

Here's a hypothetical scenario: A husband and wife are at a dinner/drinking party at a bar with a room full of friends. The husband and wife are both drunk. The husband ends up slow dancing and making out with another woman (who knows the man is married, knows the wife, has also been drinking) in fr...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

I had to share this story with you because I found it inspiriering (sp) Please take the time to read this : According to an old legend, two monks named Tanzan and Ekido were traveling together down a muddly road one day. Heavy monsoon rains had saturated the area, and they were gratful for a few moments of...

fineline · fineline

I have been working steps and living the principles of the program for many yrs to the best of my ability. I chose to stay with my active husband and had carved out a life for myself where I could be happy no matter what he was doing. I finished a degree, raised two kids, got several promotions, was involved...

angel123 · angel123

As I start a new project setting up an aquarium…My thoughts started to “THINK,” how my life and program has a way to relate to Alanon. Always apply the program in my goals and achievements. I have a 30 gal tank…I had more than 30 gallons to take to Alanon tables when I first entered. Placing the 25 lbs of roc...

Lanchas · Lanchas

I got this off of the AA board and thought I'd share it: God, Grant me the Serenity To accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference. Many folks do not understand the meanings of the Serenity Prayer, and of consequence are left in a limbo of con...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello ((All)) I'm starting to see a little bit again. At least today I know I am on the right website

I saw the doctor yesterday and my vision was 20/200 not a good number but a vast improvement over last week. It is extremely frustrating that the cause of these episodes has not been found yet...

Alyce · Alyce

I am so glad to have found this site. I moved out of state a few months ago to a more affordable place, thinking it would be a better and easier life for my husband, myself and kids. My kids are 16 and 20 (not really kids). Anyway, they are miserable here and are blaming us for ruining their lives. They w...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, For years I have strived to be independant, to certainly never to be dependant on a man. I learned this in my early childhood, having come from an Afamily, my father being the A. This was/ is my coping mechanism. I now see that I have deprived myself of so much through living this way. I am be...

Moon · Moon

I just want to say that I have no idea why I'm posting this right now, it will only tarnish my reputation, but here goes. None of you really know my story, but I can give you bits and pieces of it as I see it. I am an alcoholic and yes I have 8 years sober. That being said my husband will drink every so often...

Maria123 · Maria123

For those of you who remember Cloud, she's due to have the baby anyday now. Having some "typical" pre-birth symptoms. Looking for some prayers. I'll keep you posted when she delivers. Maria

hersh · hersh

(((Hello all from cold Colorado))) Haven't posted in a while, but was wondering if anyone could offer their opinion and/or knowledge on taking drugs for pain management. TO give you some background: My mother has been a heavy partier throughout her life, beginning probably when us kids were ea...

barisax · barisax

I want to apologize to the group for starting the "teenager" thread. It's really off topic and violates Alanon guidelines by getting into outside philosophy, and I didn't intend to create controversy with it. Yesterday I was going to delete all of my posts to the thread, but ap...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Hi, I made a post on the AA board, if anyone interested in NIA Spring Conference, AA, Alanon, Alateen in Moline, IL (near Moline airport) Email www.niafg.org for Alanon/alateen contacts. For some reason, the registration form is not available online as mentioned. or email TerryIL61301@yah...

Kasey · Kasey

I've spent many hours searching on the internet about alcoholics, and what is an alcoholic, and what I can do to help an alcoholoc. My husband, I think is one, and I've been having a pretty rough time lately. I decided that maybe I needed to think about myself for once, and that's when I fo...

irish54 · irish54

Dear Friends, As you know, my beloved grandaughter I have raised since a baby left home Dec. 10th. She was not "nice" about it and it broke my heart. But, I still continued to leave the door open to keep communication open. I also have the 14 yr old grandaughter here too. The oldest turned 1...

Klynn · Klynn

Hey guys!! I have not been around in a while!! Things WERE going pretty well there for awhile!! Of course NOW....OMG!! I dont know what to do where to go who to turn to....I guess I need opinions!! See my Hubby lost his job after coming clean about his drug use and had a HORRIBLE time finding a new job.....

still searching · still searching

Hi everyone, Just looking for input here. What would you do if you knew you alcoholic husband was drinking on the job? If he is job involved other peoples lives?? Would you go to the supervisor and thell them or would you just let it go because eventually they will find out. I am very confused over this...

debo · debo

I am at wits end. My husband has stopped and started drinking so many times that I have lost count. It got so bad a few weeks ago that I threw him out. As he had no money, no where to go, he was on my doorstep 2 days later begging for a place to stay. So the promises start. He starts to detox once again, says h...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I have enough of the program in me that I should be able to figure this out for myself but for some reason I just can't seem to. I came to Al-Anon to learn how to deal with my A/DA son and have done quite well or thought I had at learning when to let go, when to help, when to run for my life. My son is doing ok as...

IceLady · IceLady

In two hours I am going to my first real f2f al-anon meeting. I dread it so much, my stomach is in a twist and heart pounding. I am trying to stay leveled and calm. Because if let myself get into a spin I will end up feeling so overwhelmed that I will not go. But I really want to go. Specially because I have been...

kissers · kissers

I love alcoholics and ACOAs. Subconsciously I would pick someone who was emotionally unavailable and who had a fear of intimacy & abandonment, so when the relationship ended I could blame it on them. I was also afraid of the same thing. The alcoholic looked like the bad guy, but I was just as bad. He...

renah · renah

Dear all, Are there people out there that can really spend the evening with an AH who is not violent but just wants to talk to you all night. I do not feel at peace anymore. It used to not bother me and now either because I am working less program or because I am pregnant (3 months), I just can't be...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Update... I have been on a mission to get laid as of late and finally accomplished that mission last weekend. I had it so worked up in my head how wonderful it was going to be and now I find myself missing my husband. I thought I knew what I wanted, no relationship, just have fun, etc. But now I realize tha...

kicky · kicky

Just a little observation for those out there praying for their active A's to get help toward sobriety: I lived with an active A for 7 years....I went through hell and back. Recently, I started dating an old friend who, after our first date,I found out happens to be in AA and has about 2 years sobriet...

lilms · lilms

Today was the funeral for my friend. It has been a difficult day. I came home this evening to find the A here. Staying here. I was not a part of that decision. Apparantly it is for 3 or 4 days. I am too tired this evening to worry about going elsewhere. Will worry about that in the morning. Wanted to th...

barisax · barisax

When I look back at my own teen years, I have to admit it could have been worse... I didn't get into drugs and alcohol like so many of my peers did. That came later for me - but if I had discovered it as a teen, things could have been very bad. I was a loner then. I wasn't popular, but I didn't fit...

david62 · david62

Hello ((((Family)))) I got home late last nite from a little trip out to New Mexico to go skiing. This was my first time to try to ski and I left with no small amount of nervousness about the whole idea, but also very excited to try yet something else new. Something I have let fear keep me from trying in the pa...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

OK this may sound dumb but it has been bugging me. We have this cute little dog. It is my first dog. I read alot about the dogs and started teaching her tricks; sit, down, roll over, beg, shake, pray (she puts her little nose between he paws), dance (she hops on her hind legs in a circle), fetch, speak, how t...

IceLady · IceLady

Hi ppl. What does esh and other short words u guys use here mean anyways? Sorry I am from Iceland and english is not my native language.

Anne123 · Anne123

I'm 46 my AH is 51. We've been married 25years.Looking back on it now I realize he was an A when we met. He was one of those "friendly" drunks, you know, never got angry or abusive when he was drinking. 10 years ago he became dissabled due to an accident at work,--- so enter the drugs. P...

debilyn · debilyn

I was reading here that someones A is in recovery with no program. He turned his life around himself. That in itself IS the program. A personal program of recovery does not have to have AA in it. Most A's find they need AA. But some can decide enough is enough and work every day to choose not to use that...

jaja · jaja

....I think I'd been doing pretty well lately dealing (or not dealing may be more like it) with my A and his stuff and dealing with my own. Acutally, it'd been going fairly well. He has been spending just about all the time here at the house instead of the place he'd been staying at (wh...

marmare · marmare

hes safe everything is fine

marmare · marmare

My A went snowmobiling today with his friend, they got seperated and my A is lost in mountains. Search & Rescue were notified just hours ago....please pray for us... Hugs Mary

sandie123 · sandie123

Sponsorship, I know it is a very personal thing. I know that it can be a very deep relationship. How would you describe your sponsorship relationship? How has it helped you? Do you use your sponsor as a dumping ground... and is it ok to do that? Is there anything you can suggest to keep a stong relationshi...

lilms · lilms

Today I am incredibly sad. I cannot imagine this community without this wonderful gentleman. My partner did not know him so is not comprehending my sadness. For those who are interested here is the link to a description of human good. A tribute to Mark. http://www.wellandtribune.ca/webapp/si...

Christy · Christy

((((Family)))) On the 22nd my Grandson went missing from a behavioral health center. He was there to deal with some anger and behavioral issues. He wasn't there but 12 hrs. before he fled. He was in a strange town and had no friends there. He just turned 13 in Dec. and is very small for his age, only 89...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

It's called... My life is so much easier with this restraining order against you! and it goes... Although putting you in jail would make me sad and blue... To myself and the kids I must be true.... It's so much easier when I don't hear your voice I wish that you had given me another choice Qu...

slpmom · slpmom

Hello, I have not been here before I have been to the chat a number of times in the last 3 months. I am not really sure what the format is here on the message board, but a little about me... I am a mom to 3 chidlren, andmy husband is an alcohalic. That was the hardest thing for me to accept, because my mom is a r...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

My A has been staying in a raunchy little motel just a walk away from me. See, your secrets catch up with you. He was not supposed to be living with me, and did for a Long time, until a little over a week and a half ago. Someone actually turned me and him in. I believe this was divine intervention. I was doing so...

Rora · Rora

So my non-drinking Ah has been gone a week. I took our 2 year old son away to visit my family this weekend. Ah came back to the house to take care of our dog, after I had sent an email asking if he would. My son and I had to come back early tonight due to a forecasted storm that could leave us stranded. I called Ah a...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. --Bill Cosby "Oh, how I wish my dad would get sober." "Oh, how I want my friend to get help with her eating problem." "Oh, how I wish I could make my mom understand." When we become...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

My Ah is only a week clean and he knows that I am filing for a divorce and have already talked to the attorney but he wanted to come and see me and the kids so I let him. He knows my rules so he was not drinking. Even though it was only a weekend........it was the BEST weekend we have ever had. We took the kids to a b...

puzzle · puzzle

.....but somedays?..................to the moon A (that's not Alice), to the moon!!!! I am quiet tonight, it drives him crazy but I know if I tell him what is wrong it will start the attitude and arguing. I JUST want to stay quiet so leave me alone Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease. But if I say that .....

bobump · bobump

This evening, is the first court date of my charge of truancy. If you could all say a small prayer for me for tomorrow night. Not that everything works out they way I want it to, but maybe something similiar to my prayer. I will ask my HP to guide my words and actions tomorrow evening, so that I can be a vehic...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	OK, a new attempt (Preview) I only post to complain about the A and sometimes when I don't have anything to complain about I remember something from way back and bring it up. This is not good, I know that. Probably stems from some sort of codependant something or another, and I want to refresh a little. I want to say that my AH has...	RainyJamie	8	515	Mar 3, 2007 by maresie2
	it's all sooooo tiring (Preview) Ok my storey so far , hubby in aa but not working any programme, thinks putting the drink down is suffice, now replacing drinking with working 24/7 and woe betide anyone that questions his motives, how dare we, so he's decided to work himself to a frazzle, so now we have a highly stressed human bein...	Katy	5	592	Mar 3, 2007 by maresie2
	The a's secret plans hit and run and escape responsibility. (Preview) One of the A's favorite retorts is that he is going to up and leave. I never really took it seriously. Turns out in some of his little excursions that last 3 days or so like when he runs out and leaves and doesn't come back for days he has been going to see family who live like 2 hours away from here. ...	maresie2	6	523	Mar 3, 2007 by maresie2
	Living Life for me (Preview) hey family i haven't posted in a while. im up the walls busy with work and play ..lol.. im very proud of myself.... i just realised that in the last number of weeks. there was a time when all i cud think about was my "A" and HIS life... HIS choices... and MY pain... they HE caused.. or that I...	Rebecca	5	503	Mar 3, 2007 by ally
	The birthday party (Preview) Twenty years ago I met my very good friend. The first time she and her husband came to my house for dinner, they raided my liquor cabinet and got drunk. The second time they came to my house, they brought their own alcohol and got drunk. The third time they came to my house I set my boundaries. I told the...	ditto	3	346	Mar 2, 2007 by JMW
	Anyone going to the NJ Assembly meeting Sat? (Preview) I'm hoping to make it. Still up in the air but hoping to. Drop me a line. Would be great to put a face w/ the name or say hi to those I've met ! Bob	bobump	1	349	Mar 2, 2007 by aunitedway
	Ladies and Gentleman, for my final act, my disappering mind... (Preview) I do believe I've lost it for good now. I mean, for good for good. See the puff of smoke? That was my sanity. Wave bye bye! Some of you know, or remember, or something like that, that I petitioned the university based on a psych eval that it turned up I had ADD (Is anyone surprised at my lack of attentio...	Tiger2006	10	484	Mar 2, 2007 by aunitedway
	Cloud and the baby (Preview) For those of you who remember Cloud, she's due to have the baby anyday now. Having some "typical" pre-birth symptoms. Looking for some prayers. I'll keep you posted when she delivers. Maria	Maria123	5	416	Mar 2, 2007 by aunitedway
	Steps - How do I know? (Preview) I am on my first step now, how do I know if I can moove on to step 2?	IceLady	6	442	Mar 2, 2007 by Maria123
	"So waddya gonna do about it?" (Preview) "So waddya gonna do about it?" That was the quote that stood out to me from my post yesterday. No matter how many positive things were said, I zoom in on the one negative thing. Like any "good little ACA," I take on the attitude of Bob the Builder, "Can I fix it? Yes I can!&quo...	Tiger2006	8	973	Mar 2, 2007 by Maria123
	Service Here in Mip (Preview) Thought i would share here also my service experience in alanon face to face and here at Mip. When i entered alanon in person in 1999, I jumped into service right away after a few weeks. I started with getting there early setting up the tables and making coffee, then greeted the newcomers, then i eventua...	kerry5	4	519	Mar 2, 2007 by tiredtonite
	prayers please (Preview) It's been a long time since I've been here, and things still aren't any better with my brother. Still lots of ups and downs. But now my husband has left me and I am hurting so bad. He said he needs some time to think and be alone. Please pray for us to recover from this and to be together again. I d...	Jayda	8	383	Mar 2, 2007 by aunitedway
	need to get husband out, advice please! (Preview) My husband is my alcoholic. He is very sick. He is sober for a few weeks sometimes, then he starts drinking again ( about 120 ounces in 3 days) & then he is violently ill, vomiting, ketoacidosis( diabetic) and heart problems. I get him into the hospital and he is usually good for a couple of weeks...	carol	13	600	Mar 2, 2007 by smpoli
	Why wont the hope go away? (Preview) Ok so my mil tells me yesterday AH has a new job and needs this and that and I tell her he can kiss my @$$ . But she sends me these emails that he's been sending her and he sounds so not him, resigned I guess would be the right word. Still talking about how much he loves me etc. The new job is $20 an hr (dam...	carolinagirl	7	570	Mar 1, 2007 by maresie2
	Living my life for me (Preview) (((MIP Group))) Living my life for me has not been easy. In the last couple of weeks I've given some real thought about my life, the present circumstances, and what I want my future to look like. I know what I don't want. I don't want to be managing another person's emotions when I&#...	twinmom2	6	598	Mar 1, 2007 by maresie2
	question (Preview) Here's a hypothetical scenario: A husband and wife are at a dinner/drinking party at a bar with a room full of friends. The husband and wife are both drunk. The husband ends up slow dancing and making out with another woman (who knows the man is married, knows the wife, has also been drinking) in fr...	Lanchas	4	324	Mar 1, 2007 by Lanchas
	Carrying the alcoholics load???? (Preview) I had to share this story with you because I found it inspiriering (sp) Please take the time to read this : According to an old legend, two monks named Tanzan and Ekido were traveling together down a muddly road one day. Heavy monsoon rains had saturated the area, and they were gratful for a few moments of...	Friendofyours	2	374	Mar 1, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Boundaries and marriage.....help, sinking.... (Preview) I have been working steps and living the principles of the program for many yrs to the best of my ability. I chose to stay with my active husband and had carved out a life for myself where I could be happy no matter what he was doing. I finished a degree, raised two kids, got several promotions, was involved...	fineline	10	525	Mar 1, 2007 by carolinagirl
	aquarium (Preview) As I start a new project setting up an aquarium…My thoughts started to “THINK,” how my life and program has a way to relate to Alanon. Always apply the program in my goals and achievements. I have a 30 gal tank…I had more than 30 gallons to take to Alanon tables when I first entered. Placing the 25 lbs of roc...	angel123	1	297	Mar 1, 2007 by Alyce
	great message (Preview) I got this off of the AA board and thought I'd share it: God, Grant me the Serenity To accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference. Many folks do not understand the meanings of the Serenity Prayer, and of consequence are left in a limbo of con...	Lanchas	1	401	Mar 1, 2007 by irish54
	Checking in . update (Preview) Hello ((All)) I'm starting to see a little bit again. At least today I know I am on the right website I saw the doctor yesterday and my vision was 20/200 not a good number but a vast improvement over last week. It is extremely frustrating that the cause of these episodes has not been found yet...	Jennifer	3	434	Mar 1, 2007 by Jennifer
	Confused (Preview) I am so glad to have found this site. I moved out of state a few months ago to a more affordable place, thinking it would be a better and easier life for my husband, myself and kids. My kids are 16 and 20 (not really kids). Anyway, they are miserable here and are blaming us for ruining their lives. They w...	Alyce	4	293	Mar 1, 2007 by Alyce
	how can I handle criticism better? (Preview) Hi everyone, For years I have strived to be independant, to certainly never to be dependant on a man. I learned this in my early childhood, having come from an Afamily, my father being the A. This was/ is my coping mechanism. I now see that I have deprived myself of so much through living this way. I am be...	annmarie	7	1634	Feb 28, 2007 by AndiLynn
	enabling a sober alcoholic (Preview) I just want to say that I have no idea why I'm posting this right now, it will only tarnish my reputation, but here goes. None of you really know my story, but I can give you bits and pieces of it as I see it. I am an alcoholic and yes I have 8 years sober. That being said my husband will drink every so often...	Moon	10	581	Feb 28, 2007 by abbyal
	Cloud and the baby (Preview) For those of you who remember Cloud, she's due to have the baby anyday now. Having some "typical" pre-birth symptoms. Looking for some prayers. I'll keep you posted when she delivers. Maria	Maria123	1	312	Feb 28, 2007 by jrtjosey
	Suggestions on drugs for "pain management"?? (Preview) (((Hello all from cold Colorado))) Haven't posted in a while, but was wondering if anyone could offer their opinion and/or knowledge on taking drugs for pain management. TO give you some background: My mother has been a heavy partier throughout her life, beginning probably when us kids were ea...	hersh	9	640	Feb 28, 2007 by Christy
	Apology (Preview) I want to apologize to the group for starting the "teenager" thread. It's really off topic and violates Alanon guidelines by getting into outside philosophy, and I didn't intend to create controversy with it. Yesterday I was going to delete all of my posts to the thread, but ap...	barisax	7	423	Feb 28, 2007 by kerry5
	N. Illinois Spring Conference March 30- April 1 (Preview) Hi, I made a post on the AA board, if anyone interested in NIA Spring Conference, AA, Alanon, Alateen in Moline, IL (near Moline airport) Email www.niafg.org for Alanon/alateen contacts. For some reason, the registration form is not available online as mentioned. or email TerryIL61301@yah...	wallsal55	0	261	Feb 28, 2007 by wallsal55
	New to this, and could use some support (Preview) I've spent many hours searching on the internet about alcoholics, and what is an alcoholic, and what I can do to help an alcoholoc. My husband, I think is one, and I've been having a pretty rough time lately. I decided that maybe I needed to think about myself for once, and that's when I fo...	Kasey	10	385	Feb 28, 2007 by Rita G
	I AM Powerless!!!!! (Preview) Dear Friends, As you know, my beloved grandaughter I have raised since a baby left home Dec. 10th. She was not "nice" about it and it broke my heart. But, I still continued to leave the door open to keep communication open. I also have the 14 yr old grandaughter here too. The oldest turned 1...	irish54	4	466	Feb 28, 2007 by Rita G
	Have not been around in a while (Preview) Hey guys!! I have not been around in a while!! Things WERE going pretty well there for awhile!! Of course NOW....OMG!! I dont know what to do where to go who to turn to....I guess I need opinions!! See my Hubby lost his job after coming clean about his drug use and had a HORRIBLE time finding a new job.....	Klynn	4	466	Feb 28, 2007 by Rita G
	what would you do?? (Preview) Hi everyone, Just looking for input here. What would you do if you knew you alcoholic husband was drinking on the job? If he is job involved other peoples lives?? Would you go to the supervisor and thell them or would you just let it go because eventually they will find out. I am very confused over this...	still searching	12	526	Feb 28, 2007 by Rita G
	HOW DOES ANYONE GET THRU THIS? (Preview) I am at wits end. My husband has stopped and started drinking so many times that I have lost count. It got so bad a few weeks ago that I threw him out. As he had no money, no where to go, he was on my doorstep 2 days later begging for a place to stay. So the promises start. He starts to detox once again, says h...	debo	15	620	Feb 28, 2007 by Friendofyours
	ESH needed (Preview) I have enough of the program in me that I should be able to figure this out for myself but for some reason I just can't seem to. I came to Al-Anon to learn how to deal with my A/DA son and have done quite well or thought I had at learning when to let go, when to help, when to run for my life. My son is doing ok as...	Mobirdie	4	409	Feb 28, 2007 by Karilynn
	Going to my first f2f al anon meeting (Preview) In two hours I am going to my first real f2f al-anon meeting. I dread it so much, my stomach is in a twist and heart pounding. I am trying to stay leveled and calm. Because if let myself get into a spin I will end up feeling so overwhelmed that I will not go. But I really want to go. Specially because I have been...	IceLady	7	939	Feb 28, 2007 by carol
	Major Breakthrough (Preview) I love alcoholics and ACOAs. Subconsciously I would pick someone who was emotionally unavailable and who had a fear of intimacy & abandonment, so when the relationship ended I could blame it on them. I was also afraid of the same thing. The alcoholic looked like the bad guy, but I was just as bad. He...	kissers	3	306	Feb 28, 2007 by nmike
	hit a new low (Preview) Dear all, Are there people out there that can really spend the evening with an AH who is not violent but just wants to talk to you all night. I do not feel at peace anymore. It used to not bother me and now either because I am working less program or because I am pregnant (3 months), I just can't be...	renah	6	472	Feb 27, 2007 by Friendofyours
	got what i wanted now wondering what i really want??? (Preview) Update... I have been on a mission to get laid as of late and finally accomplished that mission last weekend. I had it so worked up in my head how wonderful it was going to be and now I find myself missing my husband. I thought I knew what I wanted, no relationship, just have fun, etc. But now I realize tha...	carolinagirl	7	422	Feb 27, 2007 by kicky
	Active A's vs. Sober A's...progress not perfection. (Preview) Just a little observation for those out there praying for their active A's to get help toward sobriety: I lived with an active A for 7 years....I went through hell and back. Recently, I started dating an old friend who, after our first date,I found out happens to be in AA and has about 2 years sobriet...	kicky	5	500	Feb 27, 2007 by kicky
	Difficult Day (Preview) Today was the funeral for my friend. It has been a difficult day. I came home this evening to find the A here. Staying here. I was not a part of that decision. Apparantly it is for 3 or 4 days. I am too tired this evening to worry about going elsewhere. Will worry about that in the morning. Wanted to th...	lilms	4	299	Feb 27, 2007 by Friendofyours
	God Bless The Teenager (Preview) When I look back at my own teen years, I have to admit it could have been worse... I didn't get into drugs and alcohol like so many of my peers did. That came later for me - but if I had discovered it as a teen, things could have been very bad. I was a loner then. I wasn't popular, but I didn't fit...	barisax	14	669	Feb 27, 2007 by barisax
	Look Where You Want to Go! (Preview) Hello ((((Family)))) I got home late last nite from a little trip out to New Mexico to go skiing. This was my first time to try to ski and I left with no small amount of nervousness about the whole idea, but also very excited to try yet something else new. Something I have let fear keep me from trying in the pa...	david62	11	646	Feb 27, 2007 by Moon
	I trained the dog (Preview) OK this may sound dumb but it has been bugging me. We have this cute little dog. It is my first dog. I read alot about the dogs and started teaching her tricks; sit, down, roll over, beg, shake, pray (she puts her little nose between he paws), dance (she hops on her hind legs in a circle), fetch, speak, how t...	RainyJamie	8	433	Feb 27, 2007 by lin0606
	Things I dont get (Preview) Hi ppl. What does esh and other short words u guys use here mean anyways? Sorry I am from Iceland and english is not my native language.	IceLady	4	409	Feb 27, 2007 by QOD
	Hi, I'm new so bear with me please...here's my story.. (Preview) I'm 46 my AH is 51. We've been married 25years.Looking back on it now I realize he was an A when we met. He was one of those "friendly" drunks, you know, never got angry or abusive when he was drinking. 10 years ago he became dissabled due to an accident at work,--- so enter the drugs. P...	Anne123	6	495	Feb 27, 2007 by kismetstrand
	program of recovery (Preview) I was reading here that someones A is in recovery with no program. He turned his life around himself. That in itself IS the program. A personal program of recovery does not have to have AA in it. Most A's find they need AA. But some can decide enough is enough and work every day to choose not to use that...	debilyn	3	389	Feb 27, 2007 by Kim65
	Feeling like a kept woman! (Preview) ....I think I'd been doing pretty well lately dealing (or not dealing may be more like it) with my A and his stuff and dealing with my own. Acutally, it'd been going fairly well. He has been spending just about all the time here at the house instead of the place he'd been staying at (wh...	jaja	4	539	Feb 27, 2007 by QOD
	he's found, he's home, and he's safe (Preview) hes safe everything is fine	marmare	13	539	Feb 27, 2007 by TLC2
	PRAYERS PLEASE NOW (Preview) My A went snowmobiling today with his friend, they got seperated and my A is lost in mountains. Search & Rescue were notified just hours ago....please pray for us... Hugs Mary	marmare	30	656	Feb 27, 2007 by annmarie
	Sponsorship... what does it mean to you??? (Preview) Sponsorship, I know it is a very personal thing. I know that it can be a very deep relationship. How would you describe your sponsorship relationship? How has it helped you? Do you use your sponsor as a dumping ground... and is it ok to do that? Is there anything you can suggest to keep a stong relationshi...	sandie123	2	281	Feb 26, 2007 by sandie123
	Remembering Mark (Preview) Today I am incredibly sad. I cannot imagine this community without this wonderful gentleman. My partner did not know him so is not comprehending my sadness. For those who are interested here is the link to a description of human good. A tribute to Mark. http://www.wellandtribune.ca/webapp/si...	lilms	7	393	Feb 26, 2007 by AndiLynn
	51 hours of hell (Preview) ((((Family)))) On the 22nd my Grandson went missing from a behavioral health center. He was there to deal with some anger and behavioral issues. He wasn't there but 12 hrs. before he fled. He was in a strange town and had no friends there. He just turned 13 in Dec. and is very small for his age, only 89...	Christy	15	649	Feb 26, 2007 by AndiLynn
	Writing a new song... (Preview) It's called... My life is so much easier with this restraining order against you! and it goes... Although putting you in jail would make me sad and blue... To myself and the kids I must be true.... It's so much easier when I don't hear your voice I wish that you had given me another choice Qu...	carolinagirl	4	281	Feb 26, 2007 by Maria123
	First time post (Preview) Hello, I have not been here before I have been to the chat a number of times in the last 3 months. I am not really sure what the format is here on the message board, but a little about me... I am a mom to 3 chidlren, andmy husband is an alcohalic. That was the hardest thing for me to accept, because my mom is a r...	slpmom	8	393	Feb 26, 2007 by hippietrippiechick
	He came to see me. Feels different now.....help (Preview) My A has been staying in a raunchy little motel just a walk away from me. See, your secrets catch up with you. He was not supposed to be living with me, and did for a Long time, until a little over a week and a half ago. Someone actually turned me and him in. I believe this was divine intervention. I was doing so...	hippietrippiechick	4	380	Feb 26, 2007 by AndiLynn
	just an update...looking for support... (Preview) So my non-drinking Ah has been gone a week. I took our 2 year old son away to visit my family this weekend. Ah came back to the house to take care of our dog, after I had sent an email asking if he would. My son and I had to come back early tonight due to a forecasted storm that could leave us stranded. I called Ah a...	Rora	6	446	Feb 26, 2007 by Moon
	Thoughts about detachment (Preview) I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. --Bill Cosby "Oh, how I wish my dad would get sober." "Oh, how I want my friend to get help with her eating problem." "Oh, how I wish I could make my mom understand." When we become...	Tiger2006	2	492	Feb 26, 2007 by slpmom
	I lived "in" this weekend. (Preview) My Ah is only a week clean and he knows that I am filing for a divorce and have already talked to the attorney but he wanted to come and see me and the kids so I let him. He knows my rules so he was not drinking. Even though it was only a weekend........it was the BEST weekend we have ever had. We took the kids to a b...	Friendofyours	2	799	Feb 26, 2007 by TryingToCope
	Trying so hard to learn to live with it.... (Preview) .....but somedays?..................to the moon A (that's not Alice), to the moon!!!! I am quiet tonight, it drives him crazy but I know if I tell him what is wrong it will start the attitude and arguing. I JUST want to stay quiet so leave me alone Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease. But if I say that .....	puzzle	3	398	Feb 26, 2007 by JulieLynn
	a small prayer request if I may..... (Preview) This evening, is the first court date of my charge of truancy. If you could all say a small prayer for me for tomorrow night. Not that everything works out they way I want it to, but maybe something similiar to my prayer. I will ask my HP to guide my words and actions tomorrow evening, so that I can be a vehic...	bobump	19	697	Feb 26, 2007 by mel123
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.