Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Sandy34 · Sandy34

I am newly married, and my new husband is an alcoholic... I knew that he drank occasionally when we got married but i had no idea how bad his drinking was until we moved in together. I believe alcoholism is an illness and i dont believe in leaving someone just because they are sick, but i honestly dont kno...

Loupiness · Loupiness

So in our marriage class we did a personality survey and I discovered I am of the Helper Type. Of the traits described, it said that my type can be viewed as a pushover, that I need to learn to be more aware of my needs, how to say "no", to be more willing to confront, to share all of who I am, and to a...

RippedNTorn · RippedNTorn

Hi to all.. very first time here to this site and I have read some of the postings and decided to post my own.. I'll try and keep my story short.. I am in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic.. (long distance relationship) clean and sober for 18 months.. I am clean and sober in support of my Loved one....

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I have 8 more days until the A is released back into society I would love to say that it's no big deal, etc. etc. but as most of us know he will probably show up in my vicinity or be calling wanting this that and the other. His mom said she has found a lady who can help him with a place to stay (several hours from m...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

This was his weekend to come and see the kids. I had told him that I was going to go out with a friend of mine. So when he walked in the door he reaked of vodka. It was SO nasty and he denied it. I told him in front of the kids (my bad) that he crossed my boundaries and he would need to leave and drive four hours back....

natbrat · natbrat

I'd love some feedback on this decision I've made. I'll keep it short and sweet. My sister has always been a mean drunk. WE live on different sides of the continent and have kept in touch over the phone, infrequent visits and letters. Our relationship has always been strained. My Mom thinks her nastyne...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((Family))))))))), Just wanted to take a moment to wish all of you (who are in the right hemisphere) HAPPY FIRST DAY OF FALL! This can only mean one thing: THE GREAT PUMPKIN IS COMING NEXT MONTH! I'm in the North East, and the leaves are starting to turn, the apples are getting ripe (suppose to be on...

maresie2 · maresie2

I'm finally finally finally in regroup mode. I am able to pay down some of my bills (I will be years paying them). I am looking to a time when I can save and move on. I am looking at what my options are on many many levels. I feel more positive than I have for a long time. I am going tomorrow to get my hair cut and do...

TheArtOf · TheArtOf

Just got off the phone with my ex AW. Yesterday was her birthday and my adult children and myself did not call her. Her drinking has interfered with our lives to the extent that we have decided on the tough love route. Get treatment and we will be there, until then we can't be there for you. I think she mi...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hurray I have cable! Glad to be back! Thanks for the replies to my quick update a while ago. Continuation ... I'm happy. Thinga are all coming together, I was declared legally blind, opening up all kinds of opportunities for me and releasing alot of stress over medical bills and financial issues. On th...

Cheryl28659 · Cheryl28659

I am a 43 year old, child of an alcoholc mother and MIA father. I cut off contact with my mother over 10 years ago. Her drinking left me twisted in knotts inside. All the lies, promises and just plain insanity, was just to much. I want a peacful life. With out the caos. But I must be doing something worng. Bec...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, Ok So last week I posted on Having a spiritual awakening while cleaning. Is there such a thing as too much program, because it happened again. But this time was different, maybe because I was more open to it. Well we just moved into this new place about a month ago and tonight we are having a dinner p...

gardengal · gardengal

I remember very clearly how scared and frightened I was to even call Alanon, nevermind go to a meeting. In utter desparation I finally reached out, and entered those doors. I decided to go to another city in the hopes I would not run into anyone I knew, I was ashamed and terrifed. I didnt want people to kno...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

Detachment is neither kind nor unkind. It does not imply judgment or condemnation of the person or situation from which we are detaching. Separating ourselves from the adverse affects of another persons behavior* can be a means of detaching: This does not necessarily require physical separation...

rtexas · rtexas

((((((((Everyone)))))))) How hard is it for you to speak the truth and not feel guilty? It is easy for me when it is what the person wants to hear... very, very hard when it is not. Last night was a really tough one... For about a month my wife has been so happy with her "sobriety".... I say tha...

ddub · ddub

Read something tonight about when you finally get sick and tired of being sick and tired, you are close to letting it go and moving on. hmmm, I wonder if this might be true if you let go and leave for good? then I wonder, if you don't leave, can it always be possible to let go? I figgure I am going through stag...

babysteps · babysteps

About a month ago I posted that I had decided that no matter how bad my AH was, I wouldn't say anything. Watching him go downhill was so hard, but I held firm with the knowledge that interfering with his drinking over and over throughout the years did not stop the drinking, only created an emotional disas...

maire rua · maire rua

At present I am supervising two students with their theses, one has been lax but has the work done, the other whom I had been quite friendly has annoyed the hell out of me but I calmly dealt with her today. Her life is a constant drama, and though she says she has the work done, she finds it difficult to take a...

binohio · binohio

I wind up in these work situations and have stayed with them until something happens to make me leave. The first two the companies were going bankrupt and I needed to have a job so I found another because I had to. In both cases I left a year before they folded. I took the first thing offered. Then next one th...

Becky1 · Becky1

omg! My dream has come true! Keith Urban is coming to OHIO~! And I have floor seating tickets! My friend Karen and I are going. Hubs are staying home..... I had to join Keith Urban's fan club (I joined a fan club at age 53?!?!?) LOL Tickets went on sale Tues. at 12 noon, if you joined the fan club.....

florrie · florrie

in response to some posts about money needs and job or debt pressures, i wanted to share that i was helped to move from anxiety and confusion to trust and clarity by reading while applying my step work. two books that help me, maybe they will help you too a currency of hope.....debtors anon. ...

twinkie · twinkie

I lost it this week and I am reeling from the shaming and guilt. I really let the A have it yesterday. He called mid-day to tell me what a horrible experience he had, he sounded angry, then when I said I had to go as I was at work, he was abrupt and said he'd call tomorrow. Thereafter, he called me a number of...

serendipity · serendipity

My mother called today. That probably tells you everything but that let me elaborate. I am stressed to the max. Work schedual was cut which means not as much money. Ex REFUSES to pay support as he thinks I am rich. LOL! Oh that was just has to make a girl giggle. I am supporting me and 3 kids on 240 a week. Gos...

hudsond · hudsond

Well they wanted him to put in another plea on 2 cases that he has already plead on. Then he was sent back out of there. Man the judicial system really puzzles me sometimes. So off we go again on our merry way! I just knew it was going to be a beginning to a trial. My HP likes to dangle little things so I will...

Kim65 · Kim65

First, sorry about the absense, my laptop went kaput. I LOVE my laptop, it's like losing a friend, it was my little window to the world. But anyway . . . Two days ago as I was drinking my morning coffee an AA guy I know who has helped out my ex before called and asked my permission to come and pick up the truck...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

The thing I find most interesting is the disconnect between reality and the A's perception of reality. Examples: I'm a great dad - can you give me some examples of what you do that makes you a great dad? NOOO that just incites anger. Last week I got several letters from the A - the common theme - I'm gettin...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Ok, so yesterday was a rough night. I got off work, drove home and picked up daughter to take her to youth group for the first time (she's very anti god and wants to go because of boys but I figure whatever her motivation at least she's voluntarily walking in the door :) Anwyay, got her, got the other two a...

janey225 · janey225

Yesterday was a H**l Of a day. I have been trying to do this by myself and just reading the board here. Wich has helped alot. Yesterday I lost it. I came home from school orientation (for myself) crying. For no good reason really. Just life in general. I don't cry to my AH anymore like I used to. I can't trust...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

So...yeah...there's really no good way to talk about this...to make a cute, nice intro... I'm seriously thinking of turning in my dad to the medical board. Wow there it is. And I'm laughing because if I don't I'll cry and already my neck hurts so much because I didn't sleep and eating was like not goo...

jrl · jrl

Hey all, new here, my ex-girlfriend has recently started going through AA and becoming sober (well 4 months here next week). Im very pround of her. She wanted space when she first started going through it, and me being clingy, didnt know how to do that, which partially made way to our breakup. I still lo...

rtexas · rtexas

((((((((Everyone)))))))) I have held on to my feelings of gratitude and felt blessed with the unusual sunrise this morning.... but feel HP was at work yesterday to bolster my strength. My wife and I had been talking divorce for a while now. She first as she was just frustrated with the way things are....

ally · ally

((((((((((((((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))))))))))) I've not posted in a while, as I have had things going on in my life to keep me busy the last few weeks. Some of you know I have been chatting to a guy in England online. For the last 6 weeks we have been in contact every day by the net and texting. He came t...

bobump · bobump

"Treat people as they are, and they will remain that way. Treat them as they are already what they can be, and you help them become what they are capable of becoming." Goethe Hmm......treating people as they could be was always my MO. The problem was that I didn't let go of the result. And th...

Inspiredbyhope · Inspiredbyhope

I had came here looking for some hope and answers in helping myself as well as my children through our new journey in life. I am a new member with an alcoholic spouse that is currently going thru rehab and I want to know how and where to reach out for help for us while he is doing his outreach of his own. There h...

serenity62 · serenity62

Whatever your cross, whatever your pain, there will always be sunshine, after the rain .... Perhaps you may stumble, perhaps even fall, But God's always ready, To answer your call ... He knows every heartache, sees every tear, A word from His lips, can calm every fear ... Your sorrows may linger, thro...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

Rather you agree or not I had something done today that I've wanted for a while. I got my belly pierced (fourth time due to pg's). When you're pg you have to take them out so I got it put back in now that I lost weight. But...............while I was there I saw the cutest little diamond studs for a nose pierci...

david62 · david62

************************************************************** John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone wo...

Christy · Christy

Hi family... My daughter, 35, separated with her husband at the beginning of summer after several previous times.. She has a 3 yr. old son and a full time job. She struggled paying her rent, her car payment and her babysitter for months. Her husband rarely helps her monitarily. He says that she cho...

Loupiness · Loupiness

The more I am on this board, the more I am discovering that many of the personality quirks I thought were unique to my AH are actually shared my many As. Many times when my AH comes in, he complains of his hard day and being tired. He is less miserable than he used to be, but it is still annoying. He really thi...

getoverit · getoverit

Hi roommies, I hope its all good ur ways n hopefully it is here - my recent travels to the garden show a pepper plant is coming up - yippee A recent chat the sharing person pointed out some reflections re: self, responsibility and the stopping of reinforced bahaving.. Most awesome share / chat. The ref...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Just wondering, Why is it that now, when things are harder for me well financially anyway that I feel more greatful for everything than I ever have? Why is it that when I was first single I was desperate for a man and now that I have been single longer and should be lonelier I could care less about finding a g...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Today was the last day of my 4 day weekend. I was disappointed on Saturday because I didn't get the furniture the guy had promised. Started my jaded thinking about guys and how they always let you down - but not for long. Anyway, today he came to meet me to help me move 2 twin mattresses that I got for free f...

kissers · kissers

My boss instructed me to relay a message to a colleague today. I just listened and didn't respond. He is asking a colleague to lie about being in the area of a convention I am doing, so he doesn't have to pay the full amount requested for a spot. I can understand wanting to save money; however, this is not ri...

maresie2 · maresie2

I have found all the months and months of learning how to detach from the A are coming to good use in my current life. One of the people who live in the house I live in is very destructive and to put it bluntly vicious. I am able to detach right away and focus on what I need to do. Normally I would be awah in over re...

marmare · marmare

Well, it's been months since things were crazy with me and my A. It has started again, he was in a controled drinking state which now, of course is spinning out of control. I of course thought he would be fine, I would be fine, and of course WE would be fine. I am thankful that I have continued to do my read...

bob6502 · bob6502

Ok...once again, these sponsee critters are fabulous creations. My sponsee is working on her 4th step, and we met today and talked about all things Al-Anon. In the context of our conversation, we were discussing serenity and progress not perfection. She was having problems with feeling serenity...

maire rua · maire rua

Hi All, Unfortunately my job has to finish at the end of October, the lady I replaced has decided to come back, I don't blame her its a great job. I am upset but not as devastated as I thought I would be, though its come at the worst time financially, the grant people are looking for their pound of flesh, sayi...

Fairen · Fairen

Hi Everyone ~ I've always wanted to post on boards like this, but until now, haven't had the guts to do so. I was married briefly to an alcoholic from 1995-1997. Since that time, I've dated here and there, with two long-term relationships that ended due to moves related to careers. However, about si...

Jen · Jen

There are a lot of changes happening in my life these days. It is a lot to keep up with. I have an understanding now that change is generally good, but it is still difficult to adapt so quickly. My AH is really making good progress right now and I am almost feeling hard pressed to keep up. I have to keep remind...

thinkstoomuch · thinkstoomuch

Welcome Krystina, so glad you found us. I was afraid your post might get lost in the thread on first meetings, so I started a new thread. It's great that your fiance is asking for help, and great that you are there for him. Be aware that as his recovery progresses, he may no longer want you to go to every mee...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I guess I have 2/3 of those I need the strength right now and probably more experience! My oldest is turning 13 Thursday and she is DRIVING ME NUTS!!! I really don't know how to deal with her other than yelling and smacking her occasionally! Here's the things: Attitude 24/7 like a chip on her shoulder a...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I think this is becoming my favorite slogan, but one that is so hard to live by. I am posting here now to convince myself to apply it, now. My ah went to rehab in Feb. Alcohol, drugs and an alcoholic g/f. Saved his life and my kids got their dad back, so I can't say it was a wasted experience. Quickly fell off th...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I've shared that my ah has a "friend". This person worked for us and was a part of our extended social circle. Thier relationship is still not over and my ah is not sober anymore. Was he ever? Probably not, just maintaining at a lesser degree. He is not openly drunk or using, and incredibly pri...

Emmie73 · Emmie73

This is my first post: sorry that I dont know your abbreviations yet and, if something I say doesnt make any sense to you, it might be because Im British. My husband is an active alcoholic. Ive only just started going to al-anon. Ive been to 2 meetings so far and I have found them a comfort but Im expectin...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

Things were going along beautifully and then the bottom just dropped out. In the last month, my daughters' step mom died, my home health aide of 2 years has quit and I now have 2 new ones and I have been fighting to get medical transportation that some beaurocrats decided to take away from me without noti...

maresie2 · maresie2

I know as long as I am engaged in the A's chaos I am not dealing with my own stuff. I don't much like the amount of debt I'm in. I was certainly in debt before the A and I separated. Now afer helping him for a few motnhs I'm in even more. I pulled teh plug on helping across the board. While I never in a million years...

friendofyours4 · friendofyours4

For some reason I found myself being very overprotective with my kids more then usual. It was like something was hovering over me. Well guess what? Today my daughter came to me with a night light. It was burned and a stuffed animal was burnt to it. It was very hot and if it were not found then it could have ca...

Jen · Jen

I was feeling pretty bad yesterday. Didn't even realize how bad most of the day. Was having a hard time keeping my temper with the kids. Then the A called and I really realize how the resentment has been building up. Hauling water has become the focus of my life these days and will be until the rain comes, a...

cstwwt · cstwwt

Boy oh boy, second night in a row for me posting. Boy am I glad you all are here!! I guess I'm getting into the thick of this muck!! So tonight, ah is very quiet, almost avoiding me. It's just about time to go to dd game and he is laying in bed! Says he is tired! So I suggest he stay home for 30 minutes and ju...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	At the End of my Rope help advice alcoholism Support (Preview) I am newly married, and my new husband is an alcoholic... I knew that he drank occasionally when we got married but i had no idea how bad his drinking was until we moved in together. I believe alcoholism is an illness and i dont believe in leaving someone just because they are sick, but i honestly dont kno...	Sandy34	6	8131	Sep 24, 2007 by Andrea12
	Are you a "Helper" too? (Preview) So in our marriage class we did a personality survey and I discovered I am of the Helper Type. Of the traits described, it said that my type can be viewed as a pushover, that I need to learn to be more aware of my needs, how to say "no", to be more willing to confront, to share all of who I am, and to a...	Loupiness	8	785	Sep 24, 2007 by lin0606
	Ripped And Torn :sadangel: (Preview) Hi to all.. very first time here to this site and I have read some of the postings and decided to post my own.. I'll try and keep my story short.. I am in a relationship with a recovering alcoholic.. (long distance relationship) clean and sober for 18 months.. I am clean and sober in support of my Loved one....	RippedNTorn	8	597	Sep 24, 2007 by RippedNTorn
	One week and One day.. (Preview) I have 8 more days until the A is released back into society I would love to say that it's no big deal, etc. etc. but as most of us know he will probably show up in my vicinity or be calling wanting this that and the other. His mom said she has found a lady who can help him with a place to stay (several hours from m...	carolinagirl	3	493	Sep 24, 2007 by maresie2
	He went past my boundary. I am so mad. (Preview) This was his weekend to come and see the kids. I had told him that I was going to go out with a friend of mine. So when he walked in the door he reaked of vodka. It was SO nasty and he denied it. I told him in front of the kids (my bad) that he crossed my boundaries and he would need to leave and drive four hours back....	Friendofyours	8	752	Sep 24, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Is this healthy? (Preview) I'd love some feedback on this decision I've made. I'll keep it short and sweet. My sister has always been a mean drunk. WE live on different sides of the continent and have kept in touch over the phone, infrequent visits and letters. Our relationship has always been strained. My Mom thinks her nastyne...	natbrat	6	586	Sep 24, 2007 by carolinagirl
	HAPPY FIRST DAY OF FALL! (Preview) ((((((Family))))))))), Just wanted to take a moment to wish all of you (who are in the right hemisphere) HAPPY FIRST DAY OF FALL! This can only mean one thing: THE GREAT PUMPKIN IS COMING NEXT MONTH! I'm in the North East, and the leaves are starting to turn, the apples are getting ripe (suppose to be on...	Karilynn	6	651	Sep 24, 2007 by bobump
	regrouping (Preview) I'm finally finally finally in regroup mode. I am able to pay down some of my bills (I will be years paying them). I am looking to a time when I can save and move on. I am looking at what my options are on many many levels. I feel more positive than I have for a long time. I am going tomorrow to get my hair cut and do...	maresie2	3	350	Sep 24, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Is there hope in recovery (Preview) Just got off the phone with my ex AW. Yesterday was her birthday and my adult children and myself did not call her. Her drinking has interfered with our lives to the extent that we have decided on the tough love route. Get treatment and we will be there, until then we can't be there for you. I think she mi...	TheArtOf	14	614	Sep 23, 2007 by ddub
	Hey Everyone (Preview) Hurray I have cable! Glad to be back! Thanks for the replies to my quick update a while ago. Continuation ... I'm happy. Thinga are all coming together, I was declared legally blind, opening up all kinds of opportunities for me and releasing alot of stress over medical bills and financial issues. On th...	Jennifer	5	433	Sep 23, 2007 by debilyn
	How many alcoholics does it take? A penny for your thoughts (Preview) I am a 43 year old, child of an alcoholc mother and MIA father. I cut off contact with my mother over 10 years ago. Her drinking left me twisted in knotts inside. All the lies, promises and just plain insanity, was just to much. I want a peacful life. With out the caos. But I must be doing something worng. Bec...	Cheryl28659	4	812	Sep 23, 2007 by nmike
	More scrubbing floor thoughts (Preview) Hi all, Ok So last week I posted on Having a spiritual awakening while cleaning. Is there such a thing as too much program, because it happened again. But this time was different, maybe because I was more open to it. Well we just moved into this new place about a month ago and tonight we are having a dinner p...	Mandy123	7	608	Sep 23, 2007 by marmare
	Let's share for the new comers,,our first time at an Alanon meeting..... (Preview) I remember very clearly how scared and frightened I was to even call Alanon, nevermind go to a meeting. In utter desparation I finally reached out, and entered those doors. I decided to go to another city in the hopes I would not run into anyone I knew, I was ashamed and terrifed. I didnt want people to kno...	gardengal	9	614	Sep 23, 2007 by Jen
	Detachment (Preview) Detachment is neither kind nor unkind. It does not imply judgment or condemnation of the person or situation from which we are detaching. Separating ourselves from the adverse affects of another persons behavior* can be a means of detaching: This does not necessarily require physical separation...	Peggy7	4	414	Sep 23, 2007 by cstwwt
	Truth .... Guilt (Preview) ((((((((Everyone)))))))) How hard is it for you to speak the truth and not feel guilty? It is easy for me when it is what the person wants to hear... very, very hard when it is not. Last night was a really tough one... For about a month my wife has been so happy with her "sobriety".... I say tha...	rtexas	12	639	Sep 22, 2007 by lness8
	letting go, is it always possible? (Preview) Read something tonight about when you finally get sick and tired of being sick and tired, you are close to letting it go and moving on. hmmm, I wonder if this might be true if you let go and leave for good? then I wonder, if you don't leave, can it always be possible to let go? I figgure I am going through stag...	ddub	8	548	Sep 22, 2007 by lness8
	I have been quiet...for a "good" reason (Preview) About a month ago I posted that I had decided that no matter how bad my AH was, I wouldn't say anything. Watching him go downhill was so hard, but I held firm with the knowledge that interfering with his drinking over and over throughout the years did not stop the drinking, only created an emotional disas...	babysteps	5	668	Sep 22, 2007 by Karilynn
	setting boundaries with troublesome folk (Preview) At present I am supervising two students with their theses, one has been lax but has the work done, the other whom I had been quite friendly has annoyed the hell out of me but I calmly dealt with her today. Her life is a constant drama, and though she says she has the work done, she finds it difficult to take a...	maire rua	4	416	Sep 21, 2007 by kissers
	don't know what to call this... (Preview) I wind up in these work situations and have stayed with them until something happens to make me leave. The first two the companies were going bankrupt and I needed to have a job so I found another because I had to. In both cases I left a year before they folded. I took the first thing offered. Then next one th...	binohio	7	551	Sep 21, 2007 by abbyal
	KEITH URBAN, HERE I COME (Preview) omg! My dream has come true! Keith Urban is coming to OHIO~! And I have floor seating tickets! My friend Karen and I are going. Hubs are staying home..... I had to join Keith Urban's fan club (I joined a fan club at age 53?!?!?) LOL Tickets went on sale Tues. at 12 noon, if you joined the fan club.....	Becky1	13	893	Sep 21, 2007 by Becky1
	recovery in the area of work/finances (Preview) in response to some posts about money needs and job or debt pressures, i wanted to share that i was helped to move from anxiety and confusion to trust and clarity by reading while applying my step work. two books that help me, maybe they will help you too a currency of hope.....debtors anon. ...	florrie	2	399	Sep 21, 2007 by florrie
	Lost it... (Preview) I lost it this week and I am reeling from the shaming and guilt. I really let the A have it yesterday. He called mid-day to tell me what a horrible experience he had, he sounded angry, then when I said I had to go as I was at work, he was abrupt and said he'd call tomorrow. Thereafter, he called me a number of...	twinkie	4	769	Sep 21, 2007 by florrie
	I swear I can't take it anymore (Preview) My mother called today. That probably tells you everything but that let me elaborate. I am stressed to the max. Work schedual was cut which means not as much money. Ex REFUSES to pay support as he thinks I am rich. LOL! Oh that was just has to make a girl giggle. I am supporting me and 3 kids on 240 a week. Gos...	serendipity	9	645	Sep 21, 2007 by Mandy123
	results from court (Preview) Well they wanted him to put in another plea on 2 cases that he has already plead on. Then he was sent back out of there. Man the judicial system really puzzles me sometimes. So off we go again on our merry way! I just knew it was going to be a beginning to a trial. My HP likes to dangle little things so I will...	hudsond	3	368	Sep 21, 2007 by Gailey
	Still so vulnerable! (Preview) First, sorry about the absense, my laptop went kaput. I LOVE my laptop, it's like losing a friend, it was my little window to the world. But anyway . . . Two days ago as I was drinking my morning coffee an AA guy I know who has helped out my ex before called and asked my permission to come and pick up the truck...	Kim65	10	526	Sep 21, 2007 by maresie2
	The A's reality disconnect (Preview) The thing I find most interesting is the disconnect between reality and the A's perception of reality. Examples: I'm a great dad - can you give me some examples of what you do that makes you a great dad? NOOO that just incites anger. Last week I got several letters from the A - the common theme - I'm gettin...	carolinagirl	4	533	Sep 21, 2007 by maresie2
	Gratitude and finding the good in the bad. (Preview) Ok, so yesterday was a rough night. I got off work, drove home and picked up daughter to take her to youth group for the first time (she's very anti god and wants to go because of boys but I figure whatever her motivation at least she's voluntarily walking in the door :) Anwyay, got her, got the other two a...	carolinagirl	7	537	Sep 21, 2007 by Christy
	I Got A Sponsor (Preview) Yesterday was a H**l Of a day. I have been trying to do this by myself and just reading the board here. Wich has helped alot. Yesterday I lost it. I came home from school orientation (for myself) crying. For no good reason really. Just life in general. I don't cry to my AH anymore like I used to. I can't trust...	janey225	2	325	Sep 21, 2007 by Friendofyours
	breathe...breathe...the right way...slowly... (Preview) So...yeah...there's really no good way to talk about this...to make a cute, nice intro... I'm seriously thinking of turning in my dad to the medical board. Wow there it is. And I'm laughing because if I don't I'll cry and already my neck hurts so much because I didn't sleep and eating was like not goo...	Tiger2006	9	510	Sep 21, 2007 by bobump
	Recent break up (Preview) Hey all, new here, my ex-girlfriend has recently started going through AA and becoming sober (well 4 months here next week). Im very pround of her. She wanted space when she first started going through it, and me being clingy, didnt know how to do that, which partially made way to our breakup. I still lo...	jrl	10	634	Sep 21, 2007 by jrl
	Appearantly HP was charging my batteries yesterday... cause I would need them. (Preview) ((((((((Everyone)))))))) I have held on to my feelings of gratitude and felt blessed with the unusual sunrise this morning.... but feel HP was at work yesterday to bolster my strength. My wife and I had been talking divorce for a while now. She first as she was just frustrated with the way things are....	rtexas	12	661	Sep 20, 2007 by hersh
	MY FOUR DAYS OF COMPLETE HAPPINESS (Preview) ((((((((((((((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))))))))))) I've not posted in a while, as I have had things going on in my life to keep me busy the last few weeks. Some of you know I have been chatting to a guy in England online. For the last 6 weeks we have been in contact every day by the net and texting. He came t...	ally	13	583	Sep 20, 2007 by Barbs45
	a quote that made me think this morning.... (Preview) "Treat people as they are, and they will remain that way. Treat them as they are already what they can be, and you help them become what they are capable of becoming." Goethe Hmm......treating people as they could be was always my MO. The problem was that I didn't let go of the result. And th...	bobump	4	408	Sep 20, 2007 by ddub
	Reaching out for help! (Preview) I had came here looking for some hope and answers in helping myself as well as my children through our new journey in life. I am a new member with an alcoholic spouse that is currently going thru rehab and I want to know how and where to reach out for help for us while he is doing his outreach of his own. There h...	Inspiredbyhope	5	571	Sep 20, 2007 by Loupiness
	nice poem (Preview) Whatever your cross, whatever your pain, there will always be sunshine, after the rain .... Perhaps you may stumble, perhaps even fall, But God's always ready, To answer your call ... He knows every heartache, sees every tear, A word from His lips, can calm every fear ... Your sorrows may linger, thro...	serenity62	3	712	Sep 20, 2007 by Loupiness
	I mad ah mad.......Shoe was on the other foot. (Preview) Rather you agree or not I had something done today that I've wanted for a while. I got my belly pierced (fourth time due to pg's). When you're pg you have to take them out so I got it put back in now that I lost weight. But...............while I was there I saw the cutest little diamond studs for a nose pierci...	Friendofyours	4	497	Sep 20, 2007 by Becky1
	Attitude is Everything (Preview) ************************************************************ John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone wo...**	david62	9	621	Sep 20, 2007 by chris52
	Watching my daughter rise above. (Preview) Hi family... My daughter, 35, separated with her husband at the beginning of summer after several previous times.. She has a 3 yr. old son and a full time job. She struggled paying her rent, her car payment and her babysitter for months. Her husband rarely helps her monitarily. He says that she cho...	Christy	16	850	Sep 20, 2007 by chris52
	Quick! Suggestions needed! (Preview) The more I am on this board, the more I am discovering that many of the personality quirks I thought were unique to my AH are actually shared my many As. Many times when my AH comes in, he complains of his hard day and being tired. He is less miserable than he used to be, but it is still annoying. He really thi...	Loupiness	13	556	Sep 19, 2007 by Maria123
	chat room related epiphanies (Preview) Hi roommies, I hope its all good ur ways n hopefully it is here - my recent travels to the garden show a pepper plant is coming up - yippee A recent chat the sharing person pointed out some reflections re: self, responsibility and the stopping of reinforced bahaving.. Most awesome share / chat. The ref...	getoverit	0	332	Sep 19, 2007 by getoverit
	Ahh, mothers... (Preview)	Tiger2006	2	383	Sep 19, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Why is it that? (Preview) Just wondering, Why is it that now, when things are harder for me well financially anyway that I feel more greatful for everything than I ever have? Why is it that when I was first single I was desperate for a man and now that I have been single longer and should be lonelier I could care less about finding a g...	carolinagirl	7	348	Sep 19, 2007 by maresie2
	Excellent Day!!! (Preview) Today was the last day of my 4 day weekend. I was disappointed on Saturday because I didn't get the furniture the guy had promised. Started my jaded thinking about guys and how they always let you down - but not for long. Anyway, today he came to meet me to help me move 2 twin mattresses that I got for free f...	carolinagirl	7	311	Sep 19, 2007 by Loupiness
	Craziness At Work (Preview) My boss instructed me to relay a message to a colleague today. I just listened and didn't respond. He is asking a colleague to lie about being in the area of a convention I am doing, so he doesn't have to pay the full amount requested for a spot. I can understand wanting to save money; however, this is not ri...	kissers	6	438	Sep 19, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Detaching/focus (Preview) I have found all the months and months of learning how to detach from the A are coming to good use in my current life. One of the people who live in the house I live in is very destructive and to put it bluntly vicious. I am able to detach right away and focus on what I need to do. Normally I would be awah in over re...	maresie2	2	317	Sep 19, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Been a while since there was insainty... (Preview) Well, it's been months since things were crazy with me and my A. It has started again, he was in a controled drinking state which now, of course is spinning out of control. I of course thought he would be fine, I would be fine, and of course WE would be fine. I am thankful that I have continued to do my read...	marmare	5	543	Sep 19, 2007 by Karilynn
	I am not a fruit fly!!! (Preview) Ok...once again, these sponsee critters are fabulous creations. My sponsee is working on her 4th step, and we met today and talked about all things Al-Anon. In the context of our conversation, we were discussing serenity and progress not perfection. She was having problems with feeling serenity...	bob6502	6	542	Sep 19, 2007 by Karilynn
	Insecure finances (Preview) Hi All, Unfortunately my job has to finish at the end of October, the lady I replaced has decided to come back, I don't blame her its a great job. I am upset but not as devastated as I thought I would be, though its come at the worst time financially, the grant people are looking for their pound of flesh, sayi...	maire rua	4	513	Sep 19, 2007 by maire rua
	new here, and feeling emotionally twisted... (Preview) Hi Everyone ~ I've always wanted to post on boards like this, but until now, haven't had the guts to do so. I was married briefly to an alcoholic from 1995-1997. Since that time, I've dated here and there, with two long-term relationships that ended due to moves related to careers. However, about si...	Fairen	16	814	Sep 19, 2007 by ddub
	Change is good. Really, it is. (Preview) There are a lot of changes happening in my life these days. It is a lot to keep up with. I have an understanding now that change is generally good, but it is still difficult to adapt so quickly. My AH is really making good progress right now and I am almost feeling hard pressed to keep up. I have to keep remind...	Jen	3	472	Sep 19, 2007 by Jen
	Welcome to alanon, Krystina (Preview) Welcome Krystina, so glad you found us. I was afraid your post might get lost in the thread on first meetings, so I started a new thread. It's great that your fiance is asking for help, and great that you are there for him. Be aware that as his recovery progresses, he may no longer want you to go to every mee...	thinkstoomuch	2	412	Sep 19, 2007 by ddub
	Teenage girl problems HELP!@ Need some ESH! (Preview) I guess I have 2/3 of those I need the strength right now and probably more experience! My oldest is turning 13 Thursday and she is DRIVING ME NUTS!!! I really don't know how to deal with her other than yelling and smacking her occasionally! Here's the things: Attitude 24/7 like a chip on her shoulder a...	carolinagirl	13	653	Sep 18, 2007 by lin0606
	When in Doubt, Don't (Preview) I think this is becoming my favorite slogan, but one that is so hard to live by. I am posting here now to convince myself to apply it, now. My ah went to rehab in Feb. Alcohol, drugs and an alcoholic g/f. Saved his life and my kids got their dad back, so I can't say it was a wasted experience. Quickly fell off th...	Loupiness	4	480	Sep 18, 2007 by lin0606
	Powerful Me - part 2 (Preview) I've shared that my ah has a "friend". This person worked for us and was a part of our extended social circle. Thier relationship is still not over and my ah is not sober anymore. Was he ever? Probably not, just maintaining at a lesser degree. He is not openly drunk or using, and incredibly pri...	Loupiness	6	911	Sep 18, 2007 by Loupiness
	Being undermined by my mother-in-law (Preview) This is my first post: sorry that I dont know your abbreviations yet and, if something I say doesnt make any sense to you, it might be because Im British. My husband is an active alcoholic. Ive only just started going to al-anon. Ive been to 2 meetings so far and I have found them a comfort but Im expectin...	Emmie73	7	1083	Sep 18, 2007 by Emmie73
	I feel like a rag doll (Preview) Things were going along beautifully and then the bottom just dropped out. In the last month, my daughters' step mom died, my home health aide of 2 years has quit and I now have 2 new ones and I have been fighting to get medical transportation that some beaurocrats decided to take away from me without noti...	seekingserenity	4	546	Sep 18, 2007 by maire rua
	reality (Preview) I know as long as I am engaged in the A's chaos I am not dealing with my own stuff. I don't much like the amount of debt I'm in. I was certainly in debt before the A and I separated. Now afer helping him for a few motnhs I'm in even more. I pulled teh plug on helping across the board. While I never in a million years...	maresie2	5	298	Sep 18, 2007 by maire rua
	Listen to your inner voice. (Preview) For some reason I found myself being very overprotective with my kids more then usual. It was like something was hovering over me. Well guess what? Today my daughter came to me with a night light. It was burned and a stuffed animal was burnt to it. It was very hot and if it were not found then it could have ca...	friendofyours4	4	405	Sep 18, 2007 by maire rua
	Just needing to talk (Preview) I was feeling pretty bad yesterday. Didn't even realize how bad most of the day. Was having a hard time keeping my temper with the kids. Then the A called and I really realize how the resentment has been building up. Hauling water has become the focus of my life these days and will be until the rain comes, a...	Jen	9	462	Sep 18, 2007 by Jen
	Is this where detachment comes in? (Preview) Boy oh boy, second night in a row for me posting. Boy am I glad you all are here!! I guess I'm getting into the thick of this muck!! So tonight, ah is very quiet, almost avoiding me. It's just about time to go to dd game and he is laying in bed! Says he is tired! So I suggest he stay home for 30 minutes and ju...	cstwwt	7	595	Sep 18, 2007 by carolinagirl
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.