Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

florrie · florrie

in response to some posts about money needs and job or debt pressures, i wanted to share that i was helped to move from anxiety and confusion to trust and clarity by reading while applying my step work. two books that help me, maybe they will help you too a currency of hope.....debtors anon. ...

twinkie · twinkie

I lost it this week and I am reeling from the shaming and guilt. I really let the A have it yesterday. He called mid-day to tell me what a horrible experience he had, he sounded angry, then when I said I had to go as I was at work, he was abrupt and said he'd call tomorrow. Thereafter, he called me a number of...

serendipity · serendipity

My mother called today. That probably tells you everything but that let me elaborate. I am stressed to the max. Work schedual was cut which means not as much money. Ex REFUSES to pay support as he thinks I am rich. LOL! Oh that was just has to make a girl giggle. I am supporting me and 3 kids on 240 a week. Gos...

hudsond · hudsond

Well they wanted him to put in another plea on 2 cases that he has already plead on. Then he was sent back out of there. Man the judicial system really puzzles me sometimes. So off we go again on our merry way! I just knew it was going to be a beginning to a trial. My HP likes to dangle little things so I will...

Kim65 · Kim65

First, sorry about the absense, my laptop went kaput. I LOVE my laptop, it's like losing a friend, it was my little window to the world. But anyway . . . Two days ago as I was drinking my morning coffee an AA guy I know who has helped out my ex before called and asked my permission to come and pick up the truck...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

The thing I find most interesting is the disconnect between reality and the A's perception of reality. Examples: I'm a great dad - can you give me some examples of what you do that makes you a great dad? NOOO that just incites anger. Last week I got several letters from the A - the common theme - I'm gettin...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Ok, so yesterday was a rough night. I got off work, drove home and picked up daughter to take her to youth group for the first time (she's very anti god and wants to go because of boys but I figure whatever her motivation at least she's voluntarily walking in the door :) Anwyay, got her, got the other two a...

janey225 · janey225

Yesterday was a H**l Of a day. I have been trying to do this by myself and just reading the board here. Wich has helped alot. Yesterday I lost it. I came home from school orientation (for myself) crying. For no good reason really. Just life in general. I don't cry to my AH anymore like I used to. I can't trust...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

So...yeah...there's really no good way to talk about this...to make a cute, nice intro... I'm seriously thinking of turning in my dad to the medical board. Wow there it is. And I'm laughing because if I don't I'll cry and already my neck hurts so much because I didn't sleep and eating was like not goo...

jrl · jrl

Hey all, new here, my ex-girlfriend has recently started going through AA and becoming sober (well 4 months here next week). Im very pround of her. She wanted space when she first started going through it, and me being clingy, didnt know how to do that, which partially made way to our breakup. I still lo...

rtexas · rtexas

((((((((Everyone)))))))) I have held on to my feelings of gratitude and felt blessed with the unusual sunrise this morning.... but feel HP was at work yesterday to bolster my strength. My wife and I had been talking divorce for a while now. She first as she was just frustrated with the way things are....

ally · ally

((((((((((((((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))))))))))) I've not posted in a while, as I have had things going on in my life to keep me busy the last few weeks. Some of you know I have been chatting to a guy in England online. For the last 6 weeks we have been in contact every day by the net and texting. He came t...

bobump · bobump

"Treat people as they are, and they will remain that way. Treat them as they are already what they can be, and you help them become what they are capable of becoming." Goethe Hmm......treating people as they could be was always my MO. The problem was that I didn't let go of the result. And th...

Inspiredbyhope · Inspiredbyhope

I had came here looking for some hope and answers in helping myself as well as my children through our new journey in life. I am a new member with an alcoholic spouse that is currently going thru rehab and I want to know how and where to reach out for help for us while he is doing his outreach of his own. There h...

serenity62 · serenity62

Whatever your cross, whatever your pain, there will always be sunshine, after the rain .... Perhaps you may stumble, perhaps even fall, But God's always ready, To answer your call ... He knows every heartache, sees every tear, A word from His lips, can calm every fear ... Your sorrows may linger, thro...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

Rather you agree or not I had something done today that I've wanted for a while. I got my belly pierced (fourth time due to pg's). When you're pg you have to take them out so I got it put back in now that I lost weight. But...............while I was there I saw the cutest little diamond studs for a nose pierci...

david62 · david62

************************************************************** John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone wo...

Christy · Christy

Hi family... My daughter, 35, separated with her husband at the beginning of summer after several previous times.. She has a 3 yr. old son and a full time job. She struggled paying her rent, her car payment and her babysitter for months. Her husband rarely helps her monitarily. He says that she cho...

Loupiness · Loupiness

The more I am on this board, the more I am discovering that many of the personality quirks I thought were unique to my AH are actually shared my many As. Many times when my AH comes in, he complains of his hard day and being tired. He is less miserable than he used to be, but it is still annoying. He really thi...

getoverit · getoverit

Hi roommies, I hope its all good ur ways n hopefully it is here - my recent travels to the garden show a pepper plant is coming up - yippee A recent chat the sharing person pointed out some reflections re: self, responsibility and the stopping of reinforced bahaving.. Most awesome share / chat. The ref...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Just wondering, Why is it that now, when things are harder for me well financially anyway that I feel more greatful for everything than I ever have? Why is it that when I was first single I was desperate for a man and now that I have been single longer and should be lonelier I could care less about finding a g...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Today was the last day of my 4 day weekend. I was disappointed on Saturday because I didn't get the furniture the guy had promised. Started my jaded thinking about guys and how they always let you down - but not for long. Anyway, today he came to meet me to help me move 2 twin mattresses that I got for free f...

kissers · kissers

My boss instructed me to relay a message to a colleague today. I just listened and didn't respond. He is asking a colleague to lie about being in the area of a convention I am doing, so he doesn't have to pay the full amount requested for a spot. I can understand wanting to save money; however, this is not ri...

maresie2 · maresie2

I have found all the months and months of learning how to detach from the A are coming to good use in my current life. One of the people who live in the house I live in is very destructive and to put it bluntly vicious. I am able to detach right away and focus on what I need to do. Normally I would be awah in over re...

marmare · marmare

Well, it's been months since things were crazy with me and my A. It has started again, he was in a controled drinking state which now, of course is spinning out of control. I of course thought he would be fine, I would be fine, and of course WE would be fine. I am thankful that I have continued to do my read...

bob6502 · bob6502

Ok...once again, these sponsee critters are fabulous creations. My sponsee is working on her 4th step, and we met today and talked about all things Al-Anon. In the context of our conversation, we were discussing serenity and progress not perfection. She was having problems with feeling serenity...

maire rua · maire rua

Hi All, Unfortunately my job has to finish at the end of October, the lady I replaced has decided to come back, I don't blame her its a great job. I am upset but not as devastated as I thought I would be, though its come at the worst time financially, the grant people are looking for their pound of flesh, sayi...

Fairen · Fairen

Hi Everyone ~ I've always wanted to post on boards like this, but until now, haven't had the guts to do so. I was married briefly to an alcoholic from 1995-1997. Since that time, I've dated here and there, with two long-term relationships that ended due to moves related to careers. However, about si...

Jen · Jen

There are a lot of changes happening in my life these days. It is a lot to keep up with. I have an understanding now that change is generally good, but it is still difficult to adapt so quickly. My AH is really making good progress right now and I am almost feeling hard pressed to keep up. I have to keep remind...

thinkstoomuch · thinkstoomuch

Welcome Krystina, so glad you found us. I was afraid your post might get lost in the thread on first meetings, so I started a new thread. It's great that your fiance is asking for help, and great that you are there for him. Be aware that as his recovery progresses, he may no longer want you to go to every mee...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I guess I have 2/3 of those I need the strength right now and probably more experience! My oldest is turning 13 Thursday and she is DRIVING ME NUTS!!! I really don't know how to deal with her other than yelling and smacking her occasionally! Here's the things: Attitude 24/7 like a chip on her shoulder a...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I think this is becoming my favorite slogan, but one that is so hard to live by. I am posting here now to convince myself to apply it, now. My ah went to rehab in Feb. Alcohol, drugs and an alcoholic g/f. Saved his life and my kids got their dad back, so I can't say it was a wasted experience. Quickly fell off th...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I've shared that my ah has a "friend". This person worked for us and was a part of our extended social circle. Thier relationship is still not over and my ah is not sober anymore. Was he ever? Probably not, just maintaining at a lesser degree. He is not openly drunk or using, and incredibly pri...

Emmie73 · Emmie73

This is my first post: sorry that I dont know your abbreviations yet and, if something I say doesnt make any sense to you, it might be because Im British. My husband is an active alcoholic. Ive only just started going to al-anon. Ive been to 2 meetings so far and I have found them a comfort but Im expectin...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

Things were going along beautifully and then the bottom just dropped out. In the last month, my daughters' step mom died, my home health aide of 2 years has quit and I now have 2 new ones and I have been fighting to get medical transportation that some beaurocrats decided to take away from me without noti...

maresie2 · maresie2

I know as long as I am engaged in the A's chaos I am not dealing with my own stuff. I don't much like the amount of debt I'm in. I was certainly in debt before the A and I separated. Now afer helping him for a few motnhs I'm in even more. I pulled teh plug on helping across the board. While I never in a million years...

friendofyours4 · friendofyours4

For some reason I found myself being very overprotective with my kids more then usual. It was like something was hovering over me. Well guess what? Today my daughter came to me with a night light. It was burned and a stuffed animal was burnt to it. It was very hot and if it were not found then it could have ca...

Jen · Jen

I was feeling pretty bad yesterday. Didn't even realize how bad most of the day. Was having a hard time keeping my temper with the kids. Then the A called and I really realize how the resentment has been building up. Hauling water has become the focus of my life these days and will be until the rain comes, a...

cstwwt · cstwwt

Boy oh boy, second night in a row for me posting. Boy am I glad you all are here!! I guess I'm getting into the thick of this muck!! So tonight, ah is very quiet, almost avoiding me. It's just about time to go to dd game and he is laying in bed! Says he is tired! So I suggest he stay home for 30 minutes and ju...

momof3angels · momof3angels

I will be attending my first Al anon meeting tonite. I've been wanting to for some time but have finally gotten my nerve up to actually go. My husband has been a problem drinker for some time. He has always had times where he would go on a binge for a couple of days, but it used to be much more far and few betwee...

hudsond · hudsond

Well my hubby has a court date this week. The charges are over 1 year old, one if from something he supposedly did 3 years ago. I am uneasy about it all. He isn't thrilled, but says he's not going to worry about it. I know that everyone has to deal with the consequences of their behavior, but I hate to see...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear friends, I found this today on the website for the National Association for Children of Alcholics and I thought I would share this expanded version of the 3 C's. It is written for kids, but works just as well for adults, I think. I plan to keep a copy of this in my wallet as a personal reminder . I di...

cstwwt · cstwwt

Looking for the thoughts of some of you who have been there before me....... H is sober about 2 months, going to AA and an aftercare program. Has been an A for 20 some years. We've been married 18 years. Our marriage has not been good for some time....4-5 years. Looking back alcohol has played a big par...

ddub · ddub

I won't be so angry!! I am not even sure who I am upset with most - myself or my A. In prior posts I explained how I gave up my career to stay home and raise our kids. I thought our plan was to get to a comfortable financial status and then share more the duties of parenting and household so we could both purs...

QOD · QOD

I have been feeling soooo lonely and weak over the past few weeks. I had posted a time or two about this I believe. Praying that part of my problem was due to not being on the pill and my hormones going bananas. I prayed that this loneliness and weakness would pass me by sooner than later b/c it has really...

Christy · Christy

I sent Shelli the link about her marathon. She was in awe of all the kindess here. She has responded to the thread, thanking you all. I just wanted to make sure that those who responded saw it. She is "chelleville"

maire rua · maire rua

Dear all, at present I am very short of money and have just withdrawn from a potential job which I felt would be a negative experience. I did not get a good impression of the person I would be teaching and normally I would force this situation to be right as the money for the job was excellent. I am just not ab...

rtexas · rtexas

((((((((Everyone)))))))) Today I am feeling a lot of gratitude, for you, this program and for life in general. Over time I have noticed that the tools I have used to simply keep me off the edge of the bridge... has enriched every corner of my life. I have only been in the program for a year and a half, so I h...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((MIP Friends))) Just wanted to share or vent a bit. This weekend was a nice weekend and then Sunday morning rolls around and I don't have the same feeling I had to go to church. We found this church that my AH's sponser introduced us to. The pastor's and the people seemed to be warm and welcoming. It...

sgraingermk · sgraingermk

Hey guys. First of all I want to say THANK YOU for all your responses. My friends her at Alanon are just great!!! I went to see the attorney on Wednesday. I couldn't beleive I actually I went. There had been 3 other times in the past 2 years that I had scheduled appointments that last minute I cancelled. My...

diego doe · diego doe

I am really new - maybe 10 minutes old. I don't even know if I belong here. I have reason to believe that I am in a relationship with someone who drinks too much. I don't want to make mistakes - I know I will but if I can avoid some bumps in the road it sure would be nice. How do you know if your significant oth...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I got another letter from the A from jail (they are getting more and more frequent now that he's getting out in 3 weeks). He wants to see the kids, he has no place to go, he doesn't know what he's going to do, a few guilt trips about sleeping on the church steps, that girl didn't mean anything to him, etc. an...

entropyart · entropyart

i just got married in august, in june he was diagnosed with cirrhosis but no biopsi was done so we don't know how bad it is. he seemed to not drink for 3 months (now his friends say he was sneaking). Since the wedding (8/4) he has been drinking one beer a day. he is not violent or volatile but ONE BEER WILL KIL...

sgraingermk · sgraingermk

Hello again to everyone. OK so we planned the little get together for Sunday (yesterday). Not an intervention but to for the family to talk to My AH. The plan was to see what his reaction would be after everyone spoke. Well the day before (Saturday) He called me from work and said he would like to talk a...

bob6502 · bob6502

I had a wonderful experience today. I am the proud sponsor of several people and one of them called me today. She is struggling in her marriage and called me for support and inspiration. The nice thing about the sponsor relationship is that it's a two-way street. Today it was her turn to provide me with i...

Heather72 · Heather72

My A will reach 60 days sober next week. He has been receiving bi-weekly counseling, working his drug court program and talking ALOT. I haven't been online in a while, life has been a roller coaster lately. I have been in counseling myself. My A has been slowly revealing his history. A...

maresie2 · maresie2

There may be an opportunity in a building near by to move to a larger space. I will not know for a few weeks. I am finidng it hard going to live in a tiny space and have to move most of my stuff to storage. I can get really stuck in that I'm here for ever so its important for me not to latch onto this opportunity as t...

bobump · bobump

While typing an email I said the following: The road ahead is rough, but for once in my life I have to go through something instead of around it. And around it.and around it..hahahaha Which lead me to my metaphore (for those not familiar w/ traffic circles, NJ had tons, http://en.wikipedia.org/wik...

paul123 · paul123

So last week she tells me that "I Love you, I am just not in Love with you" Then she gets mad at me for not giving her a kiss goodbye in the morning when I left for work...... These are the things that make us crazy isn't it. The uncertain emotions from my AW. She is sober and goes to meetings and I...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	recovery in the area of work/finances (Preview) in response to some posts about money needs and job or debt pressures, i wanted to share that i was helped to move from anxiety and confusion to trust and clarity by reading while applying my step work. two books that help me, maybe they will help you too a currency of hope.....debtors anon. ...	florrie	2	385	Sep 21, 2007 by florrie
	Lost it... (Preview) I lost it this week and I am reeling from the shaming and guilt. I really let the A have it yesterday. He called mid-day to tell me what a horrible experience he had, he sounded angry, then when I said I had to go as I was at work, he was abrupt and said he'd call tomorrow. Thereafter, he called me a number of...	twinkie	4	753	Sep 21, 2007 by florrie
	I swear I can't take it anymore (Preview) My mother called today. That probably tells you everything but that let me elaborate. I am stressed to the max. Work schedual was cut which means not as much money. Ex REFUSES to pay support as he thinks I am rich. LOL! Oh that was just has to make a girl giggle. I am supporting me and 3 kids on 240 a week. Gos...	serendipity	9	626	Sep 21, 2007 by Mandy123
	results from court (Preview) Well they wanted him to put in another plea on 2 cases that he has already plead on. Then he was sent back out of there. Man the judicial system really puzzles me sometimes. So off we go again on our merry way! I just knew it was going to be a beginning to a trial. My HP likes to dangle little things so I will...	hudsond	3	354	Sep 21, 2007 by Gailey
	Still so vulnerable! (Preview) First, sorry about the absense, my laptop went kaput. I LOVE my laptop, it's like losing a friend, it was my little window to the world. But anyway . . . Two days ago as I was drinking my morning coffee an AA guy I know who has helped out my ex before called and asked my permission to come and pick up the truck...	Kim65	10	511	Sep 21, 2007 by maresie2
	The A's reality disconnect (Preview) The thing I find most interesting is the disconnect between reality and the A's perception of reality. Examples: I'm a great dad - can you give me some examples of what you do that makes you a great dad? NOOO that just incites anger. Last week I got several letters from the A - the common theme - I'm gettin...	carolinagirl	4	516	Sep 21, 2007 by maresie2
	Gratitude and finding the good in the bad. (Preview) Ok, so yesterday was a rough night. I got off work, drove home and picked up daughter to take her to youth group for the first time (she's very anti god and wants to go because of boys but I figure whatever her motivation at least she's voluntarily walking in the door :) Anwyay, got her, got the other two a...	carolinagirl	7	518	Sep 21, 2007 by Christy
	I Got A Sponsor (Preview) Yesterday was a H**l Of a day. I have been trying to do this by myself and just reading the board here. Wich has helped alot. Yesterday I lost it. I came home from school orientation (for myself) crying. For no good reason really. Just life in general. I don't cry to my AH anymore like I used to. I can't trust...	janey225	2	312	Sep 21, 2007 by Friendofyours
	breathe...breathe...the right way...slowly... (Preview) So...yeah...there's really no good way to talk about this...to make a cute, nice intro... I'm seriously thinking of turning in my dad to the medical board. Wow there it is. And I'm laughing because if I don't I'll cry and already my neck hurts so much because I didn't sleep and eating was like not goo...	Tiger2006	9	496	Sep 21, 2007 by bobump
	Recent break up (Preview) Hey all, new here, my ex-girlfriend has recently started going through AA and becoming sober (well 4 months here next week). Im very pround of her. She wanted space when she first started going through it, and me being clingy, didnt know how to do that, which partially made way to our breakup. I still lo...	jrl	10	621	Sep 21, 2007 by jrl
	Appearantly HP was charging my batteries yesterday... cause I would need them. (Preview) ((((((((Everyone)))))))) I have held on to my feelings of gratitude and felt blessed with the unusual sunrise this morning.... but feel HP was at work yesterday to bolster my strength. My wife and I had been talking divorce for a while now. She first as she was just frustrated with the way things are....	rtexas	12	644	Sep 20, 2007 by hersh
	MY FOUR DAYS OF COMPLETE HAPPINESS (Preview) ((((((((((((((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))))))))))) I've not posted in a while, as I have had things going on in my life to keep me busy the last few weeks. Some of you know I have been chatting to a guy in England online. For the last 6 weeks we have been in contact every day by the net and texting. He came t...	ally	13	565	Sep 20, 2007 by Barbs45
	a quote that made me think this morning.... (Preview) "Treat people as they are, and they will remain that way. Treat them as they are already what they can be, and you help them become what they are capable of becoming." Goethe Hmm......treating people as they could be was always my MO. The problem was that I didn't let go of the result. And th...	bobump	4	384	Sep 20, 2007 by ddub
	Reaching out for help! (Preview) I had came here looking for some hope and answers in helping myself as well as my children through our new journey in life. I am a new member with an alcoholic spouse that is currently going thru rehab and I want to know how and where to reach out for help for us while he is doing his outreach of his own. There h...	Inspiredbyhope	5	552	Sep 20, 2007 by Loupiness
	nice poem (Preview) Whatever your cross, whatever your pain, there will always be sunshine, after the rain .... Perhaps you may stumble, perhaps even fall, But God's always ready, To answer your call ... He knows every heartache, sees every tear, A word from His lips, can calm every fear ... Your sorrows may linger, thro...	serenity62	3	697	Sep 20, 2007 by Loupiness
	I mad ah mad.......Shoe was on the other foot. (Preview) Rather you agree or not I had something done today that I've wanted for a while. I got my belly pierced (fourth time due to pg's). When you're pg you have to take them out so I got it put back in now that I lost weight. But...............while I was there I saw the cutest little diamond studs for a nose pierci...	Friendofyours	4	481	Sep 20, 2007 by Becky1
	Attitude is Everything (Preview) ************************************************************ John is the kind of guy you love to hate. He is always in a good mood and always has something positive to say. When someone wo...**	david62	9	604	Sep 20, 2007 by chris52
	Watching my daughter rise above. (Preview) Hi family... My daughter, 35, separated with her husband at the beginning of summer after several previous times.. She has a 3 yr. old son and a full time job. She struggled paying her rent, her car payment and her babysitter for months. Her husband rarely helps her monitarily. He says that she cho...	Christy	16	824	Sep 20, 2007 by chris52
	Quick! Suggestions needed! (Preview) The more I am on this board, the more I am discovering that many of the personality quirks I thought were unique to my AH are actually shared my many As. Many times when my AH comes in, he complains of his hard day and being tired. He is less miserable than he used to be, but it is still annoying. He really thi...	Loupiness	13	540	Sep 19, 2007 by Maria123
	chat room related epiphanies (Preview) Hi roommies, I hope its all good ur ways n hopefully it is here - my recent travels to the garden show a pepper plant is coming up - yippee A recent chat the sharing person pointed out some reflections re: self, responsibility and the stopping of reinforced bahaving.. Most awesome share / chat. The ref...	getoverit	0	317	Sep 19, 2007 by getoverit
	Ahh, mothers... (Preview)	Tiger2006	2	366	Sep 19, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Why is it that? (Preview) Just wondering, Why is it that now, when things are harder for me well financially anyway that I feel more greatful for everything than I ever have? Why is it that when I was first single I was desperate for a man and now that I have been single longer and should be lonelier I could care less about finding a g...	carolinagirl	7	333	Sep 19, 2007 by maresie2
	Excellent Day!!! (Preview) Today was the last day of my 4 day weekend. I was disappointed on Saturday because I didn't get the furniture the guy had promised. Started my jaded thinking about guys and how they always let you down - but not for long. Anyway, today he came to meet me to help me move 2 twin mattresses that I got for free f...	carolinagirl	7	297	Sep 19, 2007 by Loupiness
	Craziness At Work (Preview) My boss instructed me to relay a message to a colleague today. I just listened and didn't respond. He is asking a colleague to lie about being in the area of a convention I am doing, so he doesn't have to pay the full amount requested for a spot. I can understand wanting to save money; however, this is not ri...	kissers	6	423	Sep 19, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Detaching/focus (Preview) I have found all the months and months of learning how to detach from the A are coming to good use in my current life. One of the people who live in the house I live in is very destructive and to put it bluntly vicious. I am able to detach right away and focus on what I need to do. Normally I would be awah in over re...	maresie2	2	301	Sep 19, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Been a while since there was insainty... (Preview) Well, it's been months since things were crazy with me and my A. It has started again, he was in a controled drinking state which now, of course is spinning out of control. I of course thought he would be fine, I would be fine, and of course WE would be fine. I am thankful that I have continued to do my read...	marmare	5	526	Sep 19, 2007 by Karilynn
	I am not a fruit fly!!! (Preview) Ok...once again, these sponsee critters are fabulous creations. My sponsee is working on her 4th step, and we met today and talked about all things Al-Anon. In the context of our conversation, we were discussing serenity and progress not perfection. She was having problems with feeling serenity...	bob6502	6	528	Sep 19, 2007 by Karilynn
	Insecure finances (Preview) Hi All, Unfortunately my job has to finish at the end of October, the lady I replaced has decided to come back, I don't blame her its a great job. I am upset but not as devastated as I thought I would be, though its come at the worst time financially, the grant people are looking for their pound of flesh, sayi...	maire rua	4	497	Sep 19, 2007 by maire rua
	new here, and feeling emotionally twisted... (Preview) Hi Everyone ~ I've always wanted to post on boards like this, but until now, haven't had the guts to do so. I was married briefly to an alcoholic from 1995-1997. Since that time, I've dated here and there, with two long-term relationships that ended due to moves related to careers. However, about si...	Fairen	16	795	Sep 19, 2007 by ddub
	Change is good. Really, it is. (Preview) There are a lot of changes happening in my life these days. It is a lot to keep up with. I have an understanding now that change is generally good, but it is still difficult to adapt so quickly. My AH is really making good progress right now and I am almost feeling hard pressed to keep up. I have to keep remind...	Jen	3	454	Sep 19, 2007 by Jen
	Welcome to alanon, Krystina (Preview) Welcome Krystina, so glad you found us. I was afraid your post might get lost in the thread on first meetings, so I started a new thread. It's great that your fiance is asking for help, and great that you are there for him. Be aware that as his recovery progresses, he may no longer want you to go to every mee...	thinkstoomuch	2	398	Sep 19, 2007 by ddub
	Teenage girl problems HELP!@ Need some ESH! (Preview) I guess I have 2/3 of those I need the strength right now and probably more experience! My oldest is turning 13 Thursday and she is DRIVING ME NUTS!!! I really don't know how to deal with her other than yelling and smacking her occasionally! Here's the things: Attitude 24/7 like a chip on her shoulder a...	carolinagirl	13	636	Sep 18, 2007 by lin0606
	When in Doubt, Don't (Preview) I think this is becoming my favorite slogan, but one that is so hard to live by. I am posting here now to convince myself to apply it, now. My ah went to rehab in Feb. Alcohol, drugs and an alcoholic g/f. Saved his life and my kids got their dad back, so I can't say it was a wasted experience. Quickly fell off th...	Loupiness	4	464	Sep 18, 2007 by lin0606
	Powerful Me - part 2 (Preview) I've shared that my ah has a "friend". This person worked for us and was a part of our extended social circle. Thier relationship is still not over and my ah is not sober anymore. Was he ever? Probably not, just maintaining at a lesser degree. He is not openly drunk or using, and incredibly pri...	Loupiness	6	886	Sep 18, 2007 by Loupiness
	Being undermined by my mother-in-law (Preview) This is my first post: sorry that I dont know your abbreviations yet and, if something I say doesnt make any sense to you, it might be because Im British. My husband is an active alcoholic. Ive only just started going to al-anon. Ive been to 2 meetings so far and I have found them a comfort but Im expectin...	Emmie73	7	1009	Sep 18, 2007 by Emmie73
	I feel like a rag doll (Preview) Things were going along beautifully and then the bottom just dropped out. In the last month, my daughters' step mom died, my home health aide of 2 years has quit and I now have 2 new ones and I have been fighting to get medical transportation that some beaurocrats decided to take away from me without noti...	seekingserenity	4	528	Sep 18, 2007 by maire rua
	reality (Preview) I know as long as I am engaged in the A's chaos I am not dealing with my own stuff. I don't much like the amount of debt I'm in. I was certainly in debt before the A and I separated. Now afer helping him for a few motnhs I'm in even more. I pulled teh plug on helping across the board. While I never in a million years...	maresie2	5	285	Sep 18, 2007 by maire rua
	Listen to your inner voice. (Preview) For some reason I found myself being very overprotective with my kids more then usual. It was like something was hovering over me. Well guess what? Today my daughter came to me with a night light. It was burned and a stuffed animal was burnt to it. It was very hot and if it were not found then it could have ca...	friendofyours4	4	390	Sep 18, 2007 by maire rua
	Just needing to talk (Preview) I was feeling pretty bad yesterday. Didn't even realize how bad most of the day. Was having a hard time keeping my temper with the kids. Then the A called and I really realize how the resentment has been building up. Hauling water has become the focus of my life these days and will be until the rain comes, a...	Jen	9	447	Sep 18, 2007 by Jen
	Is this where detachment comes in? (Preview) Boy oh boy, second night in a row for me posting. Boy am I glad you all are here!! I guess I'm getting into the thick of this muck!! So tonight, ah is very quiet, almost avoiding me. It's just about time to go to dd game and he is laying in bed! Says he is tired! So I suggest he stay home for 30 minutes and ju...	cstwwt	7	576	Sep 18, 2007 by carolinagirl
	New-need to vent (Preview) I will be attending my first Al anon meeting tonite. I've been wanting to for some time but have finally gotten my nerve up to actually go. My husband has been a problem drinker for some time. He has always had times where he would go on a binge for a couple of days, but it used to be much more far and few betwee...	momof3angels	9	850	Sep 18, 2007 by Kim65
	court date (Preview) Well my hubby has a court date this week. The charges are over 1 year old, one if from something he supposedly did 3 years ago. I am uneasy about it all. He isn't thrilled, but says he's not going to worry about it. I know that everyone has to deal with the consequences of their behavior, but I hate to see...	hudsond	5	300	Sep 18, 2007 by hudsond
	The Seven C's (Preview) Dear friends, I found this today on the website for the National Association for Children of Alcholics and I thought I would share this expanded version of the 3 C's. It is written for kids, but works just as well for adults, I think. I plan to keep a copy of this in my wallet as a personal reminder . I di...	BlueCloud	2	1497	Sep 18, 2007 by friendofyours4
	wondering about future of marriage (Preview) Looking for the thoughts of some of you who have been there before me....... H is sober about 2 months, going to AA and an aftercare program. Has been an A for 20 some years. We've been married 18 years. Our marriage has not been good for some time....4-5 years. Looking back alcohol has played a big par...	cstwwt	7	585	Sep 18, 2007 by bobump
	maybe if I write about this..... (Preview) I won't be so angry!! I am not even sure who I am upset with most - myself or my A. In prior posts I explained how I gave up my career to stay home and raise our kids. I thought our plan was to get to a comfortable financial status and then share more the duties of parenting and household so we could both purs...	ddub	3	435	Sep 18, 2007 by bobump
	Feeling Lonely & Weak Lead to Guilt & Shame (Preview) I have been feeling soooo lonely and weak over the past few weeks. I had posted a time or two about this I believe. Praying that part of my problem was due to not being on the pill and my hormones going bananas. I prayed that this loneliness and weakness would pass me by sooner than later b/c it has really...	QOD	5	713	Sep 17, 2007 by Kim65
	re: The daughter/marathon thread (Preview) I sent Shelli the link about her marathon. She was in awe of all the kindess here. She has responded to the thread, thanking you all. I just wanted to make sure that those who responded saw it. She is "chelleville"	Christy	1	488	Sep 17, 2007 by friendofyours4
	detaching from people and events (Preview) Dear all, at present I am very short of money and have just withdrawn from a potential job which I felt would be a negative experience. I did not get a good impression of the person I would be teaching and normally I would force this situation to be right as the money for the job was excellent. I am just not ab...	maire rua	5	650	Sep 17, 2007 by maresie2
	Definition of insanity ... expanded (Preview) ((((((((Everyone)))))))) Today I am feeling a lot of gratitude, for you, this program and for life in general. Over time I have noticed that the tools I have used to simply keep me off the edge of the bridge... has enriched every corner of my life. I have only been in the program for a year and a half, so I h...	rtexas	6	1218	Sep 17, 2007 by maresie2
	Aism can still spoil so much (Preview) (((MIP Friends))) Just wanted to share or vent a bit. This weekend was a nice weekend and then Sunday morning rolls around and I don't have the same feeling I had to go to church. We found this church that my AH's sponser introduced us to. The pastor's and the people seemed to be warm and welcoming. It...	twinmom2	6	500	Sep 17, 2007 by maresie2
	I went to see an attorney LONG (Preview) Hey guys. First of all I want to say THANK YOU for all your responses. My friends her at Alanon are just great!!! I went to see the attorney on Wednesday. I couldn't beleive I actually I went. There had been 3 other times in the past 2 years that I had scheduled appointments that last minute I cancelled. My...	sgraingermk	7	561	Sep 17, 2007 by maresie2
	New and Lost (Preview) I am really new - maybe 10 minutes old. I don't even know if I belong here. I have reason to believe that I am in a relationship with someone who drinks too much. I don't want to make mistakes - I know I will but if I can avoid some bumps in the road it sure would be nice. How do you know if your significant oth...	diego doe	7	458	Sep 17, 2007 by diego doe
	Having a good weekend (Preview) I got another letter from the A from jail (they are getting more and more frequent now that he's getting out in 3 weeks). He wants to see the kids, he has no place to go, he doesn't know what he's going to do, a few guilt trips about sleeping on the church steps, that girl didn't mean anything to him, etc. an...	carolinagirl	3	325	Sep 17, 2007 by QOD
	new wife of alcoholic (Preview) i just got married in august, in june he was diagnosed with cirrhosis but no biopsi was done so we don't know how bad it is. he seemed to not drink for 3 months (now his friends say he was sneaking). Since the wedding (8/4) he has been drinking one beer a day. he is not violent or volatile but ONE BEER WILL KIL...	entropyart	12	793	Sep 17, 2007 by debilyn
	There is HOPE. (Preview) Hello again to everyone. OK so we planned the little get together for Sunday (yesterday). Not an intervention but to for the family to talk to My AH. The plan was to see what his reaction would be after everyone spoke. Well the day before (Saturday) He called me from work and said he would like to talk a...	sgraingermk	3	494	Sep 17, 2007 by friendofyours4
	Listening to HP (Preview) I had a wonderful experience today. I am the proud sponsor of several people and one of them called me today. She is struggling in her marriage and called me for support and inspiration. The nice thing about the sponsor relationship is that it's a two-way street. Today it was her turn to provide me with i...	bob6502	3	514	Sep 17, 2007 by Mandy123
	My A is peeking out from behind the curtain (Preview) My A will reach 60 days sober next week. He has been receiving bi-weekly counseling, working his drug court program and talking ALOT. I haven't been online in a while, life has been a roller coaster lately. I have been in counseling myself. My A has been slowly revealing his history. A...	Heather72	4	720	Sep 16, 2007 by serendipity
	an opportunity (Preview) There may be an opportunity in a building near by to move to a larger space. I will not know for a few weeks. I am finidng it hard going to live in a tiny space and have to move most of my stuff to storage. I can get really stuck in that I'm here for ever so its important for me not to latch onto this opportunity as t...	maresie2	4	299	Sep 16, 2007 by debilyn
	A metaphore that just popped into my mind ... (Preview) While typing an email I said the following: The road ahead is rough, but for once in my life I have to go through something instead of around it. And around it.and around it..hahahaha Which lead me to my metaphore (for those not familiar w/ traffic circles, NJ had tons, http://en.wikipedia.org/wik...	bobump	9	745	Sep 16, 2007 by Mandy123
	The Rollercoaster ride..... (Preview) So last week she tells me that "I Love you, I am just not in Love with you" Then she gets mad at me for not giving her a kiss goodbye in the morning when I left for work...... These are the things that make us crazy isn't it. The uncertain emotions from my AW. She is sober and goes to meetings and I...	paul123	3	614	Sep 16, 2007 by abbyal
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.