|
|
The power of communication
(Preview)
A few years ago, i wold have bailed on this job and not looked back.... Today i had to go in and teach wife how to do some stuff w/her payables and how to do payroll liability payments correctly.....She is good learner and absorbed my teaching and we got a LOT of stuff done...I had her chasing down vendor in...
|
neshema2
|
3
|
463
|
|
|
|
Detachment is a must
(Preview)
Today I realized how important it is for me to detach. Tonight after getting home from a long dat at the hospital with my 82 yr. old mother, I came home to find that my 30 yr. old A son had helped himself to the vodka in our pantry. He does not live with us but knows where the key is. Be fore al-anon I would have p...
|
Sallygcoe
|
4
|
345
|
|
|
|
Worried about my friend...prayers needed
(Preview)
My best friend is having a mammogram tomorrow due to possible breast cancer. She is going through a lot with her teenage son too...she is really stressed out. I watched her daughter tonight while she worked. She has been there for me for many years and encouraged me to leave AH. I am praying her mammogra...
|
Newlife girl
|
5
|
245
|
|
|
|
Media reporting alcoholism as the cause of a celebrity death
(Preview)
https://celebrity.yahoo.com/blogs/celeb-news/alcoholism-contributed-to-elizabeth-pe%C3%B1a-s-d...
|
Aloha
|
6
|
450
|
|
|
|
new to alanon
(Preview)
I am new here,Just starting my journey.Life became unbearable so i decided to go to therapy and my therapist suggested alanon.I have gone to three meetings and it is good to know I am not alone.I have decided not to take my ex back this time as it is always the same ,there are promises to get help but always...
|
mjferg
|
12
|
667
|
|
|
|
Feeling Really Stupid
(Preview)
Tomorrow is my last day at work. My boss is coming in from another office to take me out to lunch. She told me to invite whoever I wanted to come along. I gathered quite a few people - mostly people in the same sort of position as myself. My old boss adjusted her appointments to come and one of my old teammate...
|
tiredtonite
|
8
|
652
|
|
|
|
Called my husband's Sponsor
(Preview)
Last night AH came home under the influence. I asked him where he went after work and he said no where. I said I smell alcohol on you and I know by your behavior after all these years that you were drinking. He responded with No, No, No. Finally he told me where he went and what he drank. I told him I was cal...
|
wifeofalcoholic
|
5
|
537
|
|
|
|
First Al-anon meeting last night
(Preview)
Last night was my first Al-anon meeting :) It was scary at first. when I pulled into the parking lot, I sat in the car for a couple of minutes with butterflies in my stomach. I almost passed when it came to my turn to introduce myself. It felt good to get it out to peers that are living the same thing I am and t...
|
iwishuheaven
|
3
|
250
|
|
|
|
Want to disown stepsister and her son without disowning my mother
(Preview)
Hello friends, Nice to find this site. Over 30 years ago when I was 14 my mother married a man with 5 and 8 year old girls. They have lived happily ever after....except for relationships with his children, one of whom started drinking at 12 and is stage 4 alcoholic close to death multiple times. She has 8 y...
|
Lake
|
9
|
453
|
|
|
|
Looking Back on My Journey
(Preview)
After attending a F2F meeting this week that I hadn't been to in a while and realizing how far I have come in my 5+ years of Al-Anon, I looked back on some of my previous posts on this board. This one is from April 2012. Wow, I'm so grateful to have this program. I hope this post will be helpful to some of you who...
|
Green Eyes
|
3
|
626
|
|
|
|
control
(Preview)
I was taught many years ago that control was a response to feeling powerless. Enter steps one to seven. Its pretty hard sometimes to work steps 3 and 6 when you are a raging control freak. I am resisting the urge to hurt myself by playing spy. Gee this is hard! Old habits become entrenched relatively quic...
|
aquamom23
|
5
|
549
|
|
|
|
Am Exercising My Boundaries
(Preview)
Want to thank you all at MIP, Al-Anon and the 12 step program and relate some really good progress due to all the help provided to me through your generosity!! Have recently stood up for myself when I told AH that his verbal abuse was unacceptable and that going forward an apology would be necessary if h...
|
Debb
|
8
|
531
|
|
|
|
I relasped last night.
(Preview)
I feel like an absolute failure this morning. I feel like I flushed everything I have learn in Al-Anon down the toilet last night. My ah drank yesterday. He came home and went to bed. No arguments, no anything. Nothing unusual. I knew I needed to get away from the house for a while, so my mom and I went sho...
|
cloudyskies
|
25
|
693
|
|
|
|
I'm getting it...finally
(Preview)
I am making progress with detaching from my AH. After seeing that nasty website stuff, it has actually helped me detach even more. I am able to ignore stuff he says or texts to me. I don't find myself getting upset as much as I used to. I have to live in the here and now. he and I both mad a mistake by getting mar...
|
Newlife girl
|
10
|
647
|
|
|
|
please pray for my friend
(Preview)
A friend of mine's daughter and granddaughter were killed in a car accident this morning. Second granddaughter is in the hospital in critical condition. They were hit by a traitor trailer truck. I cannot even begin to imagine or understand the pain my friend is in. My heart aches for her. My problems...
|
cloudyskies
|
8
|
324
|
|
|
|
dry drunk,coda funk.
(Preview)
aargh the damn eggshells and cobwebs of this existence. Since beginning alanon (again!) this stupid ridiculous dis-ease hovers like a gathering cloud. I explained to the ah that doing nuts does not become me,and mrs doesn't stand for Mother Replacement System. I didn't want to explain anything bu...
|
aquamom23
|
12
|
774
|
|
|
|
update to workplace abuse (to ANY body who has to "defer" their escape)
(Preview)
I have this ANGER , over having to stay till i find another job, putting up w/abuse....I am soo angry that i have to "take it" till i can leave......I just can't leave $200 minimum a month , can't do it no matter how i try to work budget, so here i am , knowing I must, i am willing to give up to send awa...
|
neshema2
|
3
|
451
|
|
|
|
STEP 6
(Preview)
STEP 6 HAS BEEN POSTED TO THE STEP BOARD--PLEASE JOIN AND SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t58...
|
hotrod
|
0
|
176
|
|
|
|
Abuse at the workplace
(Preview)
I sure know how to pick them.... I have my Friday boss who think you are NOT a parent if you adopt (i inherited this article when his dad whom i love decided to hand the reins over to the sons) but at least the guy isn't a psycho my Wednesday client is a LOVE...but totally irresponsible and his off. mgr. a...
|
neshema2
|
9
|
637
|
|
|
|
Lol.
(Preview)
I put an add on the supermarket noticeboard a while ago, mum kid and pets seeking a place etc because, you never know. I never did hear a word from anyone until this morning, a man called me to say he has a place and would I like to come and see it. Well I'm not going to get all excited, because, you know. But I'l...
|
missmeliss
|
12
|
550
|
|
|
|
battle of wills
(Preview)
Step 3 is a hard one. Easy to say, give your will over to the care of god as you understand him. My will is annoying me, its everywhere, im seeing my will in action more and more. In conversations, when I think im being funny and jokey, my will, im wanting attention or self gratification. In most conversat...
|
el-cee
|
4
|
323
|
|
|
|
OT - What does 90 day probationary period mean to you ..
(Preview)
So you start a job on 10/20 when do you think his 90 days are up for probation? I know a weird question if you only knew the answer he gave me and told me to learn to do my math .. OMGOSH .. what a MORON!! It's hurting my son because this is all about the fact he can't play basketball now and I'm just furious .. I'm...
|
SerenityRUS
|
17
|
660
|
|
|
|
Lately I just come to read, but today I need to post...
(Preview)
Things are going really well in so many areas, but with my busy life, school, work, kids and now a boyfriend I try to see once a week, my lack of time I am noticing things happening with my 16 year old, lack of communication and with my 6 year old behaviorally acting out at school and boys and girls club...
|
Breakingfree
|
10
|
527
|
|
|
|
little update
(Preview)
I appreciate those who helped me thru this dilemma. It came down too I am way too stressed from the tenants. I have done all I can do. It may be they have to leave. Then my renting my pasture is not settled. And now my 4 H people cannot find calfs to raise yet. so she may not rent. I talked to my son who told me to t...
|
Debilyn
|
12
|
553
|
|
|
|
Sick website...are "most men" like this???
(Preview)
I am admitting something that is causing me a lot of pain. Whenever I feel sad and lonely I go to a website my AH posts on...to wake me up to the reality of how sick he really is. I just finished looking at some very disturbing images he posted. It's a site where anything goes...and people are really sick. Th...
|
Newlife girl
|
27
|
803
|
|
|
|
alanon meeting ideas
(Preview)
I feel as if my home meetings are getting a bit stale. We have different speakers sharing on different topics, we have occasional workshops, we use different booklets but I would like to try something different. Any ideas?
|
el-cee
|
7
|
4507
|
|
|
|
Getting Out Of The CoDependent Funk
(Preview)
Thank God I found Al Anon And MIP. In thetime since my Al Anon enlightenment I have learned so very much about dealing with A but most importantly, I've learned that I too have issues that need to be dealt with. Today my challenge is dealing with the codependent funk. As I examine my life over the past tw...
|
Spur
|
8
|
593
|
|
|
|
Al Anon Principles For The Masses
(Preview)
Question: Are the ideals of the Al Anon program in book form for the general population, but not specifically for recovery? I wish the program was available in a general life skills format so more people would use it, think about their relationships with themselves, family, friends, teachers, em...
|
Spur
|
6
|
2214
|
|
|
|
Today's drama.
(Preview)
Today someone from the Youth Mental Health Service called me. I didn't have my phone with me. I always have my phone with me and it always charged. Today I didn't for 1.5 hours only and missed this important call. So a person left me a voice mail asking to call back because we need to discuss my daughter's a...
|
Luiza
|
15
|
642
|
|
|
|
feeling mixed up and need help
(Preview)
Ok I don't do well with too much going on.That is how I am It's why I live out here in the country and only go to town maybe 3-4 times a month. I am making a place for tenants to put there fifth wheel and live. excavaction. then rock. So I pay for the renting tractor and the neighbor who is doing it. Then I pay for t...
|
Debilyn
|
16
|
656
|
|
|
|
dating a woman in recovery, really need some insight
(Preview)
hello to all, i have been dating a woman who is coming up on her three year celebration. in trying to understand better what she is going through and how my interactions with her might be good or bad i have been attending aa and alanon meetings, reading books and researching the internet. of course i have...
|
onewildworld
|
14
|
762
|
|
|
|
Feeling numb. Need to snap out of this
(Preview)
it feels like everything is caving in on me. I feel really sad and needy. Yesterday I had the urge to just go see AH and get a big hug...I just feel lonely and needy. I wish I could feel stronger. I guess I need to just sit and stew about it. I know I am playing a broken record, and you are all probably sick and tir...
|
Newlife girl
|
17
|
628
|
|
|
|
taking it personally
(Preview)
I know my partner loves me. We have had some sobriety and got engaged. He slipped 3 months ago and the disease has progressed quickly. He has lost his job, me , friends and is mixing with some really unhealthy people. He does not contact me or any of his friends in recovery, In my head I know it is the dis...
|
Tracy
|
5
|
502
|
|
|
|
Better again
(Preview)
Seems like I have on average one day a week where everything is suddenly terrible and too sad for words, it comes out of nowhere and I cry and moan and then its done and i'm better. I need to find some way to release this stuff that is less harmful to me, I'm open to suggestions. Its happening too often to be a o...
|
missmeliss
|
9
|
504
|
|
|
|
"S" and Janet
(Preview)
First i want to thank all of you for the comforting hug and offerings of wisdom with this death of my BFF's sister who was also very special to me.......posting here and getting out of myself to share on another, offering my best within me to others, helped me stay level on my own growing anxiety, not hear...
|
neshema2
|
5
|
503
|
|
|
|
examples of hp
(Preview)
many times in this life,my hp has pulled strings. They weren't always what I thought I wanted,but they were wonderful nonetheless. As a child,we moved alot.I craved my own home.as an adult,I've never had to worry about a roof over my head. One night,when my life was a living hell,I allowed myself to im...
|
aquamom23
|
7
|
406
|
|
|
|
New here, but same old problems..
(Preview)
Hi Everyone! I just want to say thank you in advance for anyone who takes the time to read my post/reply. I've never done anything like this before so I don't really know where to start. My therapist suggested to me that she thinks al-anon meetings would help me, but I have a very busy schedule and I think a...
|
nybeachgirl
|
4
|
3007
|
|
|
|
My HP at work
(Preview)
hi all, I'm conscious that I don't just want to post when struggling or in dispair because I know I still have a long way to go in my recovery. But tonight I find myself at home why AH has gone for a spontaneous "drink after work". He's been better if late, but I can now read the signs about him bec...
|
Tash2
|
3
|
330
|
|
|
|
needing immediate advice
(Preview)
Don't know how to handle my anger, frustration & disappointment that my husband is using again. He is a recovering alcoholic, with about 6 years sober. I gave a drug & alcohol test this afternoon. Came up negative on drinking test but came up positive on the urine sample for THC. I believe he ha...
|
jasmine r c
|
6
|
591
|
|
|
|
Relapsed
(Preview)
I've relapsed and it don't take much for me to go off into a mad frenzy i e ended up haveing his guts,then somehow there must be a tiny light there somewhere that keeps letting him back into my life I've been around him only 2days and it's been a exploding argument .wheres my alanon tools at.? I don't deserv...
|
lookingup
|
5
|
399
|
|
|
|
Newlife girl
(Preview)
couldn't do this in pm hope it is ok here. Here are brother and sister Maddie and Saber. Ex cons, brokem out a few months ago!
|
Debilyn
|
5
|
249
|
|
|
|
What might happen if...
(Preview)
We started saying that thousands of people with the disease of alcoholism are able to live happy, sober lives each year with help? Every time I read that only a small percentage of alcoholics are able to get and stay sober, I find myself wondering if those reading our posts - alcoholics and codependen...
|
grateful2be
|
18
|
655
|
|
|
|
prayer
(Preview)
When I pray which isn't often enough, I feel a sense of peace. It doesn't have to be a fancy prayer. It just has to mean something. Like the serenity prayer or please help me. Or God I can't do this alone. Thank you for being patient w/ me. I really started to pray more when I was ready for the 11th step. "...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
5
|
425
|
|
|
|
He gone for passports now.
(Preview)
So after the kitchen stuff, pictures and paintings, some furniture and even kitchen salt, STBX now took daughter's passports.. I opened the drawer were I keep important documents and my passports are there and daughter's aren't. I called the non emergency police number and they advised me to go to a...
|
Luiza
|
17
|
565
|
|
|
|
Newbie
(Preview)
So this al-anon thing is pretty new to me, however, my mothers drinking is not. She has been drinking heavily for 12 years or so that I can remember, although recently I have been made aware that she was drinking when I was a child. She had cancer a few years ago and been advised to give up caffeine and alcoh...
|
Lemissa
|
4
|
465
|
|
|
|
sad face.
(Preview)
I have a friend living near my mum, we were best friends in high school and have stayed in touch on facebook, always making plans to see each other, but it's so far so it never happens. So I was thinking to myself today, you know what, that is a big silver lining. When I am there, I can go see my friend, that wil...
|
missmeliss
|
21
|
666
|
|
|
|
Why do people in Alanon say relapse is a part of recovery.
(Preview)
I have 6 years sober. Never relapsed since starting to go to AA. Most of my peers in AA with any length of sobriety state relapse is not an option for them either. I can understand that in alanon, it helps to keep expectations of the alcoholic low, BUT if one of my sponsees in AA relapsed and tried to tell me i...
|
pinkchip
|
19
|
1090
|
|
|
|
grief and helplessness
(Preview)
My husband has been through rehab twice. We married a year later. He has not continued with therapy or AA, despite his assurances to the contrary. It has been a struggle this past year. He has developed an affinity with pot, honestly just at night due to sleep, which was a precipitating factor for hi...
|
BE0906
|
9
|
654
|
|
|
|
I'm hurt I'm pissed I'm lost because I will NOT make it right
(Preview)
I get a call this afternoon. My son got the crap beat out of him and the counselor said he was not to blame. He was put into detention for his own safety and will be moved when they find him somewhere to go. OK now I can only see him behind glass because HE DID NOTHING WRONG......he is isolated because he...
|
Cathyinaz
|
18
|
735
|
|
|
|
Controlling him by not drinking myself
(Preview)
Prior to learning the precious wisdom of AlAnon, my AH had a very very bad drinking "event" shall we say, and myself and his father were present and an agreement was made that if AH stopped drinking we would too, to support AH. I NOW KNOW this was wrong, and it was an attempt to control and mana...
|
gingerfizz
|
12
|
516
|
|
|
|
So it starts ..
(Preview)
To say I have had a lot going on this weekend is an understatement .. LOL .. it's all good, I slapped a band aide on it and hopefully I can set it to heal sooner than later. I will really have to watch myself and figure out my own discipline of works and doesn't .. I'm definitely a toddler when it comes to being...
|
SerenityRUS
|
3
|
511
|
|
|
|
Thrown for a loop
(Preview)
Just as I feel I am making progress towards a new life, I get smacked with a rock in the road. This one is a boulder. My AH and I have lived apart for over 14 months. Up until now, my mind has been pretty clear on my path. My HP has been great at keeping me on track. I began the divorce process last month but,...
|
Tossed Salad
|
13
|
666
|
|
|
|
I'm new here
(Preview)
Hello Everyone, Im happy to meet you all! I'm not new to the problem of alcoholism. I live with my AH -married 25 years and have finally decided it was time to jump off the denial train and start detaching myself from his problem. My husband crossed the line into addiction about 6 years ago becoming pr...
|
Jupiter
|
6
|
569
|
|
|
|
odaat
(Preview)
Baffling and cunning. Since putting my recovery to the fore,I've noticed a lot of guilt mists the edges of me. I feel guilty about releasing responsibility even when carryin all of it alone fails.there have been two topics that, leap out well actually three. Fear,isolating and playing martyr.havi...
|
aquamom23
|
3
|
286
|
|
|
|
Pinging Cathy
(Preview)
Hey sugar muffin, hows the foot doing???? Hope it is healing nicely.....sending healing hugs.........
|
neshema2
|
14
|
335
|
|
|
|
UPDATE on the "for old times sake post" Now I know
(Preview)
Well I guess i didn't lose anything....as illustrated by email exchange below should have put this on new thread......oh well its here and the original.....i wasn't thinking HIS EMAIL TO MEHIS "AMEND" to me when I called him out as illustrated in my letter to him, re: his calling me at wor...
|
neshema2
|
14
|
424
|
|
|
|
uncertain
(Preview)
I have been feeling so lost lately. I have a BF that I have been with for the past 6 months and he drinks. He was sober for a month but has been on a drunk again for 3 days now. I thank god I have an apartment to go to. I tried to live with him, but it has not worked out. Now I have most of my belongings at his home and I h...
|
joker
|
4
|
400
|
|
|
|
a me share/ pictures
(Preview)
Lotsa thoughts, goals, tenseness. I put an ad on CL for a pet bovine. I pictured an old dairy cow. This gal answers my ad. My dream is a Jersey mini Steer. She offers me a Jersey mini steer, seven mo. old. A friend wants to get it for me. My life has been blessed that all my dreams have been realized....
|
Debilyn
|
9
|
1261
|
|
|
|
Dreams...? How to interpret it?
(Preview)
I sometimes get freaked out by dreams. The other day I dreamed about a friend telling me that the little 4.5 year boy I look after since he was 2months old will die. Now, I receive a message from my aunty telling me that since the 1st of September, she has been having horrible dreams about my daughter and I...
|
Luiza
|
13
|
526
|
|
|
|
nearly had a heart attack
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
Sorry to bring this here but I need help. I just saw a mouse. Seriously, I nearly jumped out of my skin. I was lying on my bed and I saw something fast out of the corner of my eyes. Then there it was bold as brass just looking at me. I started screaming. Seriously, how am I going to go on with my life? Im not enteri...
|
el-cee
|
65
|
1124
|
|