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Anxiety and expectations
(Preview)
Today I am very nervous and when I sat down to read some of my literature, I realized why. I have expectations about his treatment assessment today and his court hearing. I have told myself not to, but I have been getting my hopes up that he is going to see this program through and get well.&n...
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Powerless
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5
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409
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I am so Grateful and Blessed
(Preview)
I have met so many great people on this board. Thank You for all your thoughts and prayers. I am struggling and not for the reasons you would think. For the first time in a long time I feel a sense of purpose. I wake up each day with the thought that I will be the beacon for others to see the light and help them wi...
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Sweetserenity
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2
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390
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Letting Go of the Control
(Preview)
In the last six weeks I have realized how toxic my behavior and controlling has been on my life. After being verbally and emotionally abused by my father all my childhood when I became an adult I took on this "bulldog" mentality. I wanted to prove to him and myself that I wasn't a loser.&nbs...
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twinmom2
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1
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588
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My Consequences are my OWN ~ Freedom & Liberation!
(Preview)
I am reading a book & found some eloquent quotations...
I am of the nature to grow old. I cannot escape old age.
I am of the nature to have ill-health. I cannot escape ill-health.
I am of the nature to die. I cannot escape dying.
All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the natur...
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kitty
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3
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495
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New. looking for experience, strength, and hope.
(Preview)
I am new to this, and any message board. I have attended Al-Anon meetings in the past, and wish I could go now, but I unfortunately am not free at the time there are any meetings in my area. I have decided to try something new. I am a Adult Child of an Alcoholic who is now in recovery. I did not find Al-Anon unti...
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aimer77
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5
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354
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Listen and Learn
(Preview)
Click the attachment,listen and learn,One of our slogans love angel
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angel123
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0
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478
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Need some advice....is this normal
(Preview)
Hello all
I have tried to get into the chat a few times but it is so busy and hard to get to talk--not complaining, I have learned a lot just from reading.
My husband was arrested for a dui on the day before Christmas. He has always been a drinker but swore he would never be like his father. I...
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nanasgirl
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6
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385
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Eden in March
(Preview)
Eden in March
brrrrrrrrr chills. It tis cold here.
Well I, lets see, all so exciting.filled the birdfeeders, had to put hamster food in some, ran out of bird seed. I am sure I shook enough out of my sweat shirt to feed twenty chickens too. Came into the house and h...
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debilyn
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9
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316
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Cocoon
(Preview)
My mother used to tell me things, she would say, "I am saving you grief, learn from my words." It would drive me in a fury!
I read somewhere recently about the papryus struggling to get out of the cocoon... if it doesn't have it's struggles, it would not gain strength, the strength to wrig...
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kitty
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3
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347
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thank you and update
(Preview)
I wanted to thank all of you for your responses to my post(bruised). It really helped me.I am going to the women's center on Friday morning. I have also begun looking in the paper for some apartments, and I found one I am going to call. the thing about my A/abuser, is that he doesn't really do the who...
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lilleah
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8
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324
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Manipulation or Meaness
(Preview)
You know we aren't suppose to focus on the alcoholic but I have to wonder. I have posted about my husband always threatening divorce. We are currently seperated but we were seeing quite a bit of each other until a little over a week ago. We got into an argument and he told me that he wan...
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JulieLynn
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6
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403
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Bizarre thing happened to me today
(Preview)
Hello everyone - I wanted to let you know what happened to me today. I know God is always with me and this is why.
Today, I decided to walk to take my movies back to blockbuster. It was one by the school where I teach. I usually ride my bike and it takes me 15-20 minutes to get there. Today, I decided to walk. A...
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Robinks
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9
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374
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Update--A-dau home
(Preview)
So glad she got here about .5hr ago. Was washed up and ready to take over kids.
Not sure how to apply boundaries when neighbor brings kids and am trapped . I will be telling her no more A in my apt period beings she won't put a limit on it. I did not want to and feared doing something othe...
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d53sjurne
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2
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382
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who has an online sponsor and how do you work it?
(Preview)
how do you do the steps online? what about crisis? Do you "need" to get together f2f? I find it easier to put together an email - it feels like I can get more of my train of thought on paper, think more thoroughly about topics, etc.
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Barbara
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1
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298
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Quick update from yesterday
(Preview)
My "a" called yesterday evening and let me know that he ended the relationship with the girl at work. I asked all my questions the night before and he also shared more in the counselors office. I asked how she took it, he said it was not pretty. She was confused and felt he wanted the sa...
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twinmom2
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3
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264
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fear of revenge ? what to do
(Preview)
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d53sjurne
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5
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350
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How does one, "Accept the things I cannot change?"
(Preview)
The serenity prayer teaches us to, "accept the things I cannot change."
This is the same as saying, "accept unacceptable behavior because you can't change it." If a person believes this to be true, he/she sooner or later must collapse under the weight of it all. We are told that we cannot change th...
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Diva
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16
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1217
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Beware the Ides of March ~ Another Special Sentiment gone
(Preview)
So this has been a weird year for me, many changes in my mother's beahviour since I "learned" to work on loving myself.
March 1 ~ we heard no exuberant "it's birthday month baby!" & today she barked over the phone. "your cake is ready & I froze it." (why?)
 &nb...
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kitty
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2
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575
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Very. very. very new.
(Preview)
Hello,
My name is Karen and I am not just new to this group, but new to Alanon completely. I've been to I think one face to face meeting back when I lived in Rochester, but that's almost a year ago now. I do have some program under my belt, however, as I am also a recovering alcoholic, but I'm r...
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kspear
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6
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367
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Elvis needs a door man
(Preview)
Can someone get David's door for me tonight? With all going on around here I cannot committ to being there.
Josey
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jrtjosey
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1
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307
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Kitty Update
(Preview)
Well since the car wreck, I have been sleeping a lot, not really sure why it took so much out of me but it has/did.m Sleeping plum through the am mgs, naps during the days & no more vampire hours!
Also, having to deal with the insurance & hearing my car was 'not worth fixing' ...
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kitty
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8
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429
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sometimes life can be too much
(Preview)
haven't been on the boards as much as my back is out AGAIN, and i am wondering how long i can go b4 i am disabled....i will do all i can to take care of me, but not expect too much...day to day, just trying to work on the soft tissue "knots" i find in there, and doing my cleansi...
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rosie light shines
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6
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447
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That darn cat!
(Preview)
Well it is interesting around here after telling my husband I wanted a seperation. HIs first reaction was no, all it is going to do his cost money, we'll get the same lawyer and get it over.
Yesterday at lunch he comes home asking why I don't think this will work. Spewed a bunch of cr...
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jrtjosey
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5
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382
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How do we decide who's consequenses they are?
(Preview)
There have been a few discussions on here, and they make a lot of sense.
When detaching and letting someone suffer natural consequenses, how do we as Wives, husbands, parents, know who's consequenses they are.
How after so many years of doing the wrong things, do I pull the plug?
When we get marr...
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Jeannie
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7
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445
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Is it the hole in the soul ?
(Preview)
     Questioning thoughts 
...
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d53sjurne
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6
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489
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Isn't it enabling?
(Preview)
I was talking with my Mom today and she was angry at my husband.
She asked how everyone was feeling and I told her better. Then she asked if as%h*le (her name for my husband) had been any help. I told her that he was at his Mom's. I said no, he is drinking and the kids and I didn't want him around.She asked if h...
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Jeannie
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10
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463
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Accepting the things I cannot change
(Preview)
Hi (((friends))))
A has ben home 4 days now, it seems longer..lol
I guess we're attempting to settle in to some sort of routine, although a difficult one.
I'd hoped to see my A's mentality getting better day by day, but he's about the same.
He tends to say wrong words but sometimes it's pretty...
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Christy
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8
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419
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frustrated
(Preview)
I am so frustrated today. My best friend of 20 years is driving me nuts about my "a". It was her idea for me to go to alanon, so for that I am thankful, but she can't f-ing let it go! Every time she talks to me, she asks me if my a is drinking, what I am saying to him/doing about it, etc. ...
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paintthinnr
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5
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316
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To Leave or Not to Leave, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
(Preview)
My friends,
I haven't been on much lately, my "A" went to jail, and I let myself slip into total "Mommy-Mode" which isn't a bad thing, but when you don't take care of yourslef, it all goes to hell no matter how hard you are trying.
Well my "A" spent 25 days in the jail, and was released last Monday. Long e...
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Dolphin123
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7
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374
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Working my Program
(Preview)
The good mood is continuing. Today my husband didn't have to work because of the rain. I let him sleep in, normally I would be resentful that he was sleeping like a baby and I was up with the baby and doing chores. Today I went about my chores and told myself that I would do them alone if h...
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Powerless
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5
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322
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he got it
(Preview)
Yesterday my husband got the bill of sale. I am suffering from both a cold and now emotional/mentally.
I cut my arm over this car issue. it is like scartchs marks with a knife.
alot of people have been helping me. it is hard to change my thinking. once u cut u feel the pain at that moment leave. but then m...
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nycbt
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9
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385
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We're back on today
(Preview)
So much has happened between my "a" and myself over the weekend. I cannot share this with anyone other than my fellow Alanoner's because my family is going to go through the roof over this one. My "a" cancelled his visit with the kids on Sunday because he was busy moving into a bigger place,...
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twinmom2
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5
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441
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Need ESH
(Preview)
Hi there. I'm Stacy and I need some ESH.
My A (boyfriend) is working the program in AA and has had some success, though when he slips it seems to get worse. Anyway, he also has had an addiction to Adderal in the past. He is STILL taking it, insisting that he needs it for his ADD, but las...
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SerenityGirl
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3
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313
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Yet another update
(Preview)
I am taking 1/2 the day off, (scary with a new job) mom has an appointment with the oncolgist this afternoon. They will tell us what the PET and CAT scan's said. They have found a hole in her hip bone.
My son and his girlfriend are to be at the hospital this morning also, the doc is pret...
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marmare
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3
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287
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no time for update just checking in
(Preview)
Hi all !
No time for an update, just checking in. Just wanted to let ya'll know I'm doing well considering all that is going on. I'd only be doing 1/2 as well w/o the program and all of ya!
Bob
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bobump
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11
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468
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hanging on
(Preview)
thank you leo and tlc. I spent Jan. and Feb. with my gma. She died march first, national pig day. She wanted to go. Would have been 106 April 11, 06. Was a very wonderful/horrible experience.
I have been here reading. So much has taken about all I got. Couldn't even talk or listen anymore&...
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debilyn
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8
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415
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Vacation Prayer...
(Preview)
(...in my best souther dialect...)
LORD… grant me a serene fishing hole and a dock that won’t let me down… allow me the clarity of mind to understand this is fishin’ and not catchin’… Grant us your guidance that we don’t kill each other in the go-cart this year. Help me to accept that lose...
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rtexas
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1
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278
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Cat Is Out
(Preview)
Original talk with my husband went fairly well, telling him I wanted to seperate. He said no get a divorce and we will sit down and get this over. All was calm, so I left to get a perm and he did talk to boys about still being around for them. He then retreated to garage. Called me a couple...
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jrtjosey
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6
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426
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court is now twisting my words - restraining order
(Preview)
My mother just called me (again). Said she called the social worker at court who told her to call my brothers probation officer.
I called my mother Fri, told her I had received daily emails (20pgs worth) from my brother. They are all anger, anger, anger. I thought the court should know as he's putting...
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Barbara
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1
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350
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Group Inventory
(Preview)
Hiya friends,
We have a few more weeks left to conduct our Group Inventory. I encourage everyone to participate because this is part of making sure we have a healthy group.
The website for the group inventory is:
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.asp?u=647211844531
Much love in r...
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bob6502
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1
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327
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A Poem - Who Am I?
(Preview)
JUST ANOTHER EXISTENTIAL CRISIS 
Who am I to think what I have to say matters...
Who am I to think I could help anyone?
Why is it that God made me so sensitive I wanted to jump our of my skin most of my life?
Why is that I can touch someone & know what is wrong & my hands burn like fir...
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kitty
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4
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417
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March 14th Courage To Change
(Preview)
 
MARCH 14
One beautiful day, a man sat down under a tree, not noticing it was full of pigeons. Shortly, the pigeons did what pigeons do best. The man shout&sh...
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Debbie Lee
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4
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3597
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New here.
(Preview)
Hi there. I just went to my first Al-Anon meeting on Saturday. Even just BEING there seemed to allow me to let out a big sigh and relax for a few minutes.
My dh is an active alcoholic. He's the kind that justifies his drinking because he only drinks on weekends and then it's because h...
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Iko
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8
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326
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bruised
(Preview)
Well my A came home the other night, and I had fallen asleep from the wine I drank. He was infuriated that I had drank a bottle of wine. I believe, that he saw that I had been on this web page, and saw my post(why am I so angry)b/c I had the screen up, and forgot to close it out before I fell asleep. He left,...
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lilleah
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8
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404
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for barbara
(Preview)
Hope for Today - March 14
At one of my Al-Anon meetings, I heard an interesting way to categorize the Twelve Steps into four groups -- giving up, owning up, making up, and keeping up. Steps One through Three are about giving up. I give up the illusion that I can control the alcoholic,...
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rosie light shines
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1
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275
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my brother returns to court today for his pretrial
(Preview)
Please God get him help! Im starting to wonder if the court system actually helps people or if its just there to enforce the law. Its going to be a long day for our family.
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Barbara
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4
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289
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my husband getting a car
(Preview)
I have been with my husband since aug 99. In that whole time he didn't have a licnese or a car. Well within the yr he has gotten his license that he is paying off. He has credit cards now. He is now in the process of getting a car. I am scared to death about him getting a car. I have had a past of cutting and the thou...
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nycbt
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4
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409
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Happy Birthday Tea2
(Preview)
((((((((((((((((((((Tea 2))))))))))))))))))))))))))),
I know how hard this week is on you, but may I be the first of many to wish you:
 HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET TEA! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
I am a firm...
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Karilynn
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11
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378
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state of grace
(Preview)
I suppose wtvr I was doing before, wasn't the "right" thing... I mean if I were really in a state of grace, I wouldn't be complaining or upset about anything.
>sigh<
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kitty
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5
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329
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the rollercoaster ride of emtion..
(Preview)
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DeAnna
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8
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527
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Group Inventory
(Preview)
Hello friends,
Enclosed is the website for the Group Inventory. It is:
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.asp?u=647211844531
Please take a moment of your time to answer these questions. The intentory is based on the same inventory that face-to-face groups use as a tool to help with the growt...
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bob6502
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2
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261
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mfp- my first post
(Preview)
this is what i could really use some help with...
it is my anger then tears - that crazy out of control feeling...
my a, who is not living at home right now, but says he wants to, was meeting me and our 5 kids saturday for a day skiing together. on friday night he called to make arrangements...
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quest
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6
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395
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Slogans - whats your favorite? what do you keep returning to?
(Preview)
Have only begun to start using some of the slogans. I used the Just for Today bookmark almost daily when I first got here in Oct. What slogans do you keep using?
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Barbara
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5
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359
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What a Transformation
(Preview)
Hi all
On friday I posted about my A drinking again and how I was going to do my own thing and keep busy over the weekend, well I spent saturday with my daughter and grandson and it was fab.. I felt confident and in control of my day...Didnt get home till late, well late for me. As soon as I got i...
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penny
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3
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284
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Newbie with a question
(Preview)
Hi,
I'm new and have been surfing here a bit. My situation is that I have been married for 11 years to an A; Of course, it has been a rocky road - two separations and reconcilliations. Lots of things lead to him entering treatment and recovery about a year ago.
Here's my problem...
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Mollyd
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6
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328
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A Friend / A Sponsor
(Preview)
(A)ccepts you as you are - s/he should because s/he is probably there, or has been there
(B)elieves in "you" - and know the Promises are true.
(C)alls you just to say "Hi" - "Have you read the Big Book today?"
(D)oesnt give up on you - s/he gets you back on the 12 steps
(E)nvisions the whole of you - e...
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Barbara
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1
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297
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Topics and the steps - what topics did you find helpful and with what step?
(Preview)
Im thinking of reading up on different topics when I get to each new step: (I know each step also has readings in the daily readers). What other topics would you add to each step?
1) Detachment, powerlessness, unmanageability
2) Higher power, sanity
3) decision-making, willingness, G...
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Barbara
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1
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246
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When to let the cat out!?
(Preview)
I had planned on telling my husband we were leaving yesterday, but my son screwed it up Saturday by qualifying for State Westling competition in two weeks.
I'm ready to to tell him anytime, but have been waiting for the boys wrestling to finish up as not to upset their lives by living with a prick with t...
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jrtjosey
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5
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414
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Quoting from Al-Anon Literature
(Preview)
Hi Everyone,
I wanted to point something out to any of you who might not know this. Our conference approved literature, One Day at a Time, Courage to Change ... etc. has all been copyrighted by the WSO (World Service Office).
It is okay for us to quote up to one paragraph of this material at a time...
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david62
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3
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326
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Post Rehab/Still not happy
(Preview)
Firstly, this board is great. Just found it a week ago, and find myself checking it all day. Great source of inspiration. My situation is a follows, and wondering if anyone else feels (or felt) like this.....
My wife of 13 years has been a pretty chronic alcoholic for most of our marriage, getting wor...
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Jeffr
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8
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344
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