Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

I was just looking at the calendar and on Friday, March 23, it will be the 20-year anniversary of the first date I had with my wife. We spent the evening at a meeting and doing step work related stuff. I wrote a story about it for the AA Grapevine in 2010. I think I posted it on this board a few years ago......y...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

LOL .. oh my, my oldest really puts me through the parenting loops and tests me in ways I constantly fail. He pulled something that was completely unfair, as I have been extremely clear about how I feel about the person he's dating. So I have a trans son who is dating a gay boy (that came out after the two...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

Today's reading addresses two key concepts in AlAnon, Acceptance and Surrender. Far from suggesting weakness, acceptance calls for acknowledgement of the people, places and things we cannot control, and to surrender is to take our God or Higher Power's will over our own.Adopting these two attit...

joker · joker

Its been awhile since I posted. Since December 2017 when my word went upside down with the ex abf and legal charges were laid for abuse toward me, I have been working very hard on my recovery, journaling my feelings and frustrations, anger, fears, worries, ect and accessing outside help. I even got use...

Ugh-me · Ugh-me

Hello All, I'm new to this. I'm currently married to a newly recovering alcoholic for about a year now. I finally put my foot down with my wife and stated if she didn't seek treatment we were done. She did seek treatment and has not drank now in about 7 months now. The first few months out of recovery were gr...

notrub1974 · notrub1974

So when we last left off- hubby had just gotten arrested for DUI. That was Tuesday night/Wednesday morning. The sheriff's office told me I had to wait for him to have a bond hearing to see how much bond would be and that would not be until Thursday morning. In the meantime, his boss actually called me look...

momsad · momsad

I know we don't give advice in Al-Anon, but I would deeply appreciate some guidance about my son's recent relapse. My young adult son had 5 months sobriety and recently relapsed. He returned to his sober living home and is continuing on his path of recovery. I have many family and friends who inquir...

Lyne · Lyne

Minding my own business: The writer speaks of her focus on everyone else, neglecting herself. She had many thoughts of, he should or she shouldn't. She realized she isn't in charge of making rules for others, having all the answers, driver courtesy, etc. These issues are better left to HP. She d...

wifeofalcoholic · wifeofalcoholic

Tonight I came home from work and knew my husband had been drinking. When he sobered up I asked him what happened today that he was drinking again. He lied and kept telling me he didn't drink and all sorts of stories of asking why I think that. He finally admitted to drinking. I tried to have an open dia...

S_413 · S_413

Hello this is my first time posting on here and I am in desperate need of some help and encouragement. I have been with my a h now for about 4 years. He is in his mid 20's and has had a problem with drinking for awhile now. He got into trouble for drinking and driving and gave up alcohol for a while. Our relation...

Isthisreallife · Isthisreallife

I feel like I'm at the lowest of lows. Things have been bad for over a year. My husband is completely jackel and Hyde. Sober loving husband thinks I'm the moon and stars. Drunk husband spouts off about how I'm the worst mistake of his life and wished we didn't have our children. He s gotten moderately phys...

Overcome · Overcome

March 18, 2018SUNDAY MORNING & EVENING AL-ANON MEETING 10AM & 7 PM EST (7AM & 6PM PACIFIC)TOPICS: SERENITY, ODAAT, and Powerlessness, and how we deal with it in Al-Anon?The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how while we may not be responsible for having been part of an alcoholic environment, we now can be accountable for consequences of our past and choices we have made. The sentence that stuck out to me from this reading is: Many of the amends I need to mak...

Freetime · Freetime

Hi MIP friends. I wanted to share an amusing (in hindsight) thing that happened to me. A while back, I received a catalog in the mail. It was a catalog of cute gift items aimed at women, little things you might buy for a friend -- mugs, t-shirts, hats, costume jewelry, candles, etc. As I paged through th...

lookingup · lookingup

The ODAT reading for 3-17 (Saint Patrick's Day)speaks to the truth that many times the difficult situations that we face often bring out our hidden assets such as our courage,patience, faith and ability to rely on others.The reading suggests that when we share our Losses and triumphs with eac...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

To recap, my AH is in rehab since Nov 4th. He is currently doing so well that they have him in their RA program. My son has seen him several times due to passes from rehab (always with another family member(s) present. I have seen him only once... at our tax appointment last month. He has been served the div...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

So, I live in Nova Scotia, and usually our winters are fairly harsh, lots of snow and all that good stuff. This year has been mild and everyone up this way is happy about that. Last night, we had a noreaster headed our way, there was supposed to be a lot of snow and rain and high wind. Naturally, it was the one...

Enigmatic · Enigmatic

While IAH is tending to other matters I'm pinch hitting today's C2C which speaks about forgiveness: it is not ours to withhold or extend from a position of power or judgment. The reading states that since we all fall short, forgiving is an opportunity to be reminded of our equal footing with all of god'...

notrub1974 · notrub1974

Just as I was starting to feel somewhat ok with how I was doing.... I went to a face to face meeting tonight and when I got out, I checked my texts. AH had texted me about 10 min before the end of the meeting that he got fired and his sponsor was trying keep him from killing himself. That was about 2 hours ago and...

serenity47 · serenity47

It has been a trying few months. We have relocated, lost a young nephew and niece the past two months. . My relationship with grown daughter continues to improve and I am grateful, however, she remains in an extremely dysfunctional relationship with someone whom is very unstable. Despite repea...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Good morning MIP! I'm traveling this week, so my posting timing is a bit off. The reading in Courage to Change for today is one of my very favorites. One beautiful day, a man sat down under a tree, but did not notice that the tree was full of pigeons. After a while, the pigeons did what pigeons do, and the m...

Ann_Y · Ann_Y

Hi All, I have been on the board a few times. I lost my PW so I had to re-register. I was Ann_M_Y but my new screen name is Ann_Y. I have not been to an in person meeting. I really have no excuse of why I haven't gone to one. My husband was sober for 3 months and he slipped. He drank yesterday and today. He goes fu...

Iamhere · Iamhere

I made mention in passing that my mom had a slight stroke Friday night. My parents are 83 and have had a long and blessed life. However, they are both slipping just a bit mentally and I have used my program to not worry or fret too much. They are definitely on OPT (Old People Time) which means they go to be...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I have been trying to focus on something within my job because I have been so utterly frustrated as of late and that is not working for me. First I have lacked motivation and I am frustrated over things I can't change which is other people. That's really been a tough one, so I have chosen to remain aloof h...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is a look at the phrase take care of yourself. I will admit that when I was just coming to the program and new to it, when someone told me to care for myself I typically responded with a (visible) eye roll. It seemed trite to me- of course I was taking care of myself bl...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for March 13 speaks about the doubts and fears that we entertain once the alcoholic has achieved sobriety. The reading points out that this must be overcome, because this lack of confidence can do untold damage. It suggests that even if a relapse should happen,the injury is not to us...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Well things are improving slowly but surely. I am grateful that I am starting to sleep a little better. My mind is starting to clear a little after a long couple of weeks struggling w sleep. I feel better but still have to deal w long days. I have been reading more alanon literature. I have even studied...

notrub1974 · notrub1974

I have been with AH for over 20 years (married 19 last Nov) and he has been trying to quit drinking for a little over a year now. I know there are going to be relapses and I am usually not mad about that (disappointed, yes but mad, no because it does no good to be mad). So, at the first part of the year, AH was pres...

MizzB · MizzB

So ABF is AWOL again. Relapsed 3 weeks after dragging his mum back from her holiday abroad to help her detox. Last time he relapsed he was suicidal so being AWOL and alone is obviously worrying for me. But this is about me, not him. I feel like I'm bottled up. I'm a can of fizzy pop being shaken and waiting t...

momsad · momsad

Good morning all. I've been in Al-Anon since December so I'm relatively new. Al-Anon has helped me a great deal both through meetings and the literature. I'm in real need of support today. My 21 year old son had 5 months of sobriety and relapsed a few days ago. At first it seemed like a slip and that h...

Lyne · Lyne

Detaching with love: The writer states that someone else's mood, tone, and/or state of inebriation does not have to effect his course of actions, unless he allows it. Alanon is teaching him that he does not have to react when provoked, nor take harsh words to heart . He can be in charge of his decisio...

Groo · Groo

Two years ago I had no job, was isolated, and was living with a mentally ill delusional alcoholic (AH) who was the main bread winner. Things were horrible so I decided to say yes to a few opportunities. My SIL got me a part time job, my other SIL invited us to join her bike group, and the delusional alcoholi...

Itsjustme1988 · Itsjustme1988

As I sit at the bedside of my alcoholic fiancee as he is sedated because he is going through withdrawals. I'm struggling with how to handle things. I don't know what to do or say. I feel that his life is in jeopardy and I'm very scared. I know he needs to make a decision to get sober on his own. I'm definitel...

Need2believe17 · Need2believe17

I have struggled with drinking for years but have been sober for 3 months. I am married to an alcoholic. I need to learn how to continue my sobriety and hopefully stay married because I love my husband but I dont know how to deal with my sobriety and him continuing to drink. He has had dui's and legal issues...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for today clearly states that we come to alanon to receive help from unbearable pain and suffering. Many of us believe this pain is caused by another, however since we are powerless over others, alanon directs us to look inward, to uncover what we are doing that is causing our pain. T...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I had an awful dream this morning. In the dream my ah left me. He said it was because we were arguing too much. Now I am awake & crying. I just want to share w someone out there. Now I have to bed. I haven't been sleeping well. It is 6:30 in the morning. I need to go back to sleep. Thanks for letting me s...

Belle Again · Belle Again

I'm writing as I recognised after a difficult Al-Anon meeting tonight, that one of the reasons I'm angry with my A is because I'm worried that my second marriage will break up and I fear that happening. I fear finding out that the boundaries my anger hides might make the decision for me, that I have to cal...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

According to the index in c2c, today's reading falls under the topic "Confusion." The reading focuses on the confusion around what is hp's will for the reader and self will. The reading goes on to tell us that doubt is an unavoidable companion to spiritual seeking and encourages exploration and chal...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Today's reading is about anger. The reading says losing our temper can be a disease too. It goes on to tell us that "anger-sickness" is an uncontrollable impuse to judge and condemn someone else. The reading likens it to an emotional explosion that brings temporary relief. It reminds the reader abou...

Elabella · Elabella

Today Iâm feeling defeated. The last week has been completely unbearable dealing with AH outbursts. Last night I lost my cool because he put me on the spot with a friend of his. He is at the point that he canât understand how to do new things. He arbitrarily decided that at THAT precise moment I was going t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

My AH is having I think age-related physical issues. It is so easy to think about how long he is going to be on this earth. I have been crying almost nonstop. It might be that I am so tired as well. So anyway easy does it right? & one day at a time. By the way he is 24 years older than I am & I am finally afte...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Today's reading is about unacceptable behavior. The writer shares about their experience growing up in an alcoholic home where they experienced unhealthy behaviors particularly criticism from others. They had trouble sorting out acceptable behavior from unacceptable behavior. The reading...

SoggySlippers · SoggySlippers

When I am caught up in the obsession of what my AH is or isn't doing,there's problems between us(of course).My controlling ways cause many huge arguments and make me feel miserable.If I try to talk to him about anything he completely shuts me out and gives me the silent treatment.It's like a punishmen...

pumkin26 · pumkin26

Hi All, just thought I would pop up here today as it marks 1 yr of recovery- for ME. A year ago, crying and broken, mad and hurt- I would've never thought in a year this is where I would be- today I am very thankful for everyone here that helped me in those early days and overall very thankful and grateful to Al...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Does anyone have any ESH on not having kids for one reason or another? Need to let go of the dream at 51?

Iamhere · Iamhere

Hey all... I am on mobile and don't see where to send private messages... I usually post a daily each Thu and Fri, and have no literature with me... Can someone please take care of tomorrow? Thanks in advance...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading is about learning and practicing to do and be different. The writer talks about how attending meetings helps us learn new ways of working our recovery program. She attended one, and the chairperson passed around a basket full of slogan. She asked that each person take one, and try...

Jerry F · Jerry F

It isn't only about not drinking ...is it. I so related to this page and what he was sharing. Seeing the big picture is 20/20 eyesight. Gratitude lists are a must. (((hugs)))

StarryAmmo · StarryAmmo

I have never asked for help or guidance outside of HP. I've been reading posts upon more posts. My AH has progressed to the point of not being able to hold a job. We've been married 27 yrs. Raised 3 children who are all moved out. He progressively got to where we are now. He's always been addicted to one sub...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I have a 37 year old college educated daughter who suffers from what seems to be anxiety/depression/ocd exacerbated by alcoholism/prescription and other drug abuse, and a tragic history of domestic violence and sexual assault. She has seemingly adopted the emotional abuse which was heaped on he...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the beauty we each hold inside. The author shares that, after living with a disease of attitudes for a lifetime, they did not think that anything good would come out of their efforts, because they didn't have self confidence or self esteem. The author lea...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In my home group, we have been working the steps as a group on Thursday nights. I've found it useful to work through them again. Today, I came home from my Sunday meeting to a cheerful wife. We walked our Chloe, and met the neighbors from across the street for the first time. We stayed and chatted with the...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Well I was in there & didn't know how to respond. Can anyone tell me how? I want to go back in there.

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

This one has really been on my mind lately especially as I deal with my oldest. What is the difference between the issue of Responsibility vs Expectation for me. In watching my oldest struggle pretty hard this past semester one thing I have really seen is that what are my expectations in terms of beha...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for March 6 things about the importance of anonymity between Al-Anon members and while attending an Al-Anon meetings. The reading points out that what we hear in meetings or what is shared between each member must be held in confidence and kept locked in our minds and hearts, We can al...

CASphilbrook · CASphilbrook

I accidentally posted in the business forum a while ago. I'm new to this. My husband is (was) a recovering alcoholic. When I met him he went to just about every meeting nearby. Work and other responsibilities reduced the times he attended. But if he ever started getting in a "mood", I would very nicely l...

Jennifer617 · Jennifer617

Iâm really struggling with my husband. He is unable to stay sober, Iâm not sure at what point I should leave. Iâm new to all of this. Any advice ?

hotrod · hotrod

The C2C reading for March 3 speaks about the fourth step. The reading indicates that if we look inward deeply enough we may find that many of our attitudes, and actions and unrealistic, immature and childlike. It then goes on to explain what mature behavior looks like which includes: " knowing ours...

Elabella · Elabella

So here I am hiding in my bedroom because Iâm avoiding AH who is on a complete rampage on me. He got angry at me when I suggested he should not come to friends of the family tonight. Our daughter is going over to sleepover. He wants to go over to have a talk with our friend. She is dealing with a lot today- havin...

CedarTexas · CedarTexas

So my story, my fiance slipped 4 weeks ago after being sober for 400+ days. We have known each other since we were 11, but had not been in touch for 20 years until we reconnected in 2016. When we first reconnected she told me that she was an alcoholic and was in recovery, at that time only for 6 months, but sh...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Time Flies, don't it? (Preview) I was just looking at the calendar and on Friday, March 23, it will be the 20-year anniversary of the first date I had with my wife. We spent the evening at a meeting and doing step work related stuff. I wrote a story about it for the AA Grapevine in 2010. I think I posted it on this board a few years ago......y...	Wolfie55	5	368	Mar 20, 2018 by Jerry F
	When in doubt don't .. (Preview) LOL .. oh my, my oldest really puts me through the parenting loops and tests me in ways I constantly fail. He pulled something that was completely unfair, as I have been extremely clear about how I feel about the person he's dating. So I have a trans son who is dating a gay boy (that came out after the two...	SerenityRUS	18	744	Mar 20, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	3/16/18 ODAT – Acceptance & Surrender (Preview) Today's reading addresses two key concepts in AlAnon, Acceptance and Surrender. Far from suggesting weakness, acceptance calls for acknowledgement of the people, places and things we cannot control, and to surrender is to take our God or Higher Power's will over our own.Adopting these two attit...	Enigmatic	8	945	Mar 20, 2018 by Iamhere
	Calming down (Preview) Its been awhile since I posted. Since December 2017 when my word went upside down with the ex abf and legal charges were laid for abuse toward me, I have been working very hard on my recovery, journaling my feelings and frustrations, anger, fears, worries, ect and accessing outside help. I even got use...	joker	2	505	Mar 19, 2018 by Iamhere
	Searching for answers (Preview) Hello All, I'm new to this. I'm currently married to a newly recovering alcoholic for about a year now. I finally put my foot down with my wife and stated if she didn't seek treatment we were done. She did seek treatment and has not drank now in about 7 months now. The first few months out of recovery were gr...	Ugh-me	4	388	Mar 19, 2018 by DavidG
	Update on myself and AH (Preview) So when we last left off- hubby had just gotten arrested for DUI. That was Tuesday night/Wednesday morning. The sheriff's office told me I had to wait for him to have a bond hearing to see how much bond would be and that would not be until Thursday morning. In the meantime, his boss actually called me look...	notrub1974	4	474	Mar 19, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	What is anonymity? When does it apply? (Preview) I know we don't give advice in Al-Anon, but I would deeply appreciate some guidance about my son's recent relapse. My young adult son had 5 months sobriety and recently relapsed. He returned to his sober living home and is continuing on his path of recovery. I have many family and friends who inquir...	momsad	12	519	Mar 19, 2018 by Bo
	C2C, 3/19 (Preview) Minding my own business: The writer speaks of her focus on everyone else, neglecting herself. She had many thoughts of, he should or she shouldn't. She realized she isn't in charge of making rules for others, having all the answers, driver courtesy, etc. These issues are better left to HP. She d...	Lyne	2	335	Mar 19, 2018 by Iamhere
	Emotional Agony (Preview) Tonight I came home from work and knew my husband had been drinking. When he sobered up I asked him what happened today that he was drinking again. He lied and kept telling me he didn't drink and all sorts of stories of asking why I think that. He finally admitted to drinking. I tried to have an open dia...	wifeofalcoholic	12	715	Mar 19, 2018 by MeTwo2
	At a loss.. (Preview) Hello this is my first time posting on here and I am in desperate need of some help and encouragement. I have been with my a h now for about 4 years. He is in his mid 20's and has had a problem with drinking for awhile now. He got into trouble for drinking and driving and gave up alcohol for a while. Our relation...	S_413	5	458	Mar 18, 2018 by AnnieFenk321
	So frustrated (Preview) I feel like I'm at the lowest of lows. Things have been bad for over a year. My husband is completely jackel and Hyde. Sober loving husband thinks I'm the moon and stars. Drunk husband spouts off about how I'm the worst mistake of his life and wished we didn't have our children. He s gotten moderately phys...	Isthisreallife	9	483	Mar 18, 2018 by jtpickle
	MORNING MEETING (Preview) March 18, 2018SUNDAY MORNING & EVENING AL-ANON MEETING 10AM & 7 PM EST (7AM & 6PM PACIFIC)TOPICS: SERENITY, ODAAT, and Powerlessness, and how we deal with it in Al-Anon?The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other...	Overcome	0	321	Mar 18, 2018 by Overcome
	Hope for Today Mar 18 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how while we may not be responsible for having been part of an alcoholic environment, we now can be accountable for consequences of our past and choices we have made. The sentence that stuck out to me from this reading is: Many of the amends I need to mak...	yanksfan51	3	309	Mar 18, 2018 by Aline
	I took what I liked and left the rest (Preview) Hi MIP friends. I wanted to share an amusing (in hindsight) thing that happened to me. A while back, I received a catalog in the mail. It was a catalog of cute gift items aimed at women, little things you might buy for a friend -- mugs, t-shirts, hats, costume jewelry, candles, etc. As I paged through th...	Freetime	6	518	Mar 17, 2018 by DavidG
	ODAT 3/17 (Preview) The ODAT reading for 3-17 (Saint Patrick's Day)speaks to the truth that many times the difficult situations that we face often bring out our hidden assets such as our courage,patience, faith and ability to rely on others.The reading suggests that when we share our Losses and triumphs with eac...	lookingup	3	609	Mar 17, 2018 by Stan1
	Thought, please? (Preview) To recap, my AH is in rehab since Nov 4th. He is currently doing so well that they have him in their RA program. My son has seen him several times due to passes from rehab (always with another family member(s) present. I have seen him only once... at our tax appointment last month. He has been served the div...	PosiesandPuppies	8	590	Mar 16, 2018 by Jerry F
	Hope (Preview) So, I live in Nova Scotia, and usually our winters are fairly harsh, lots of snow and all that good stuff. This year has been mild and everyone up this way is happy about that. Last night, we had a noreaster headed our way, there was supposed to be a lot of snow and rain and high wind. Naturally, it was the one...	Wolfie55	5	631	Mar 15, 2018 by DavidG
	3/15/18 C2C - Forgiveness (Preview) While IAH is tending to other matters I'm pinch hitting today's C2C which speaks about forgiveness: it is not ours to withhold or extend from a position of power or judgment. The reading states that since we all fall short, forgiving is an opportunity to be reminded of our equal footing with all of god'...	Enigmatic	5	489	Mar 15, 2018 by Iamhere
	Feeling in crisis right now (Preview) Just as I was starting to feel somewhat ok with how I was doing.... I went to a face to face meeting tonight and when I got out, I checked my texts. AH had texted me about 10 min before the end of the meeting that he got fired and his sponsor was trying keep him from killing himself. That was about 2 hours ago and...	notrub1974	14	546	Mar 15, 2018 by Doingmybest
	Worry/Detatch (Preview) It has been a trying few months. We have relocated, lost a young nephew and niece the past two months. . My relationship with grown daughter continues to improve and I am grateful, however, she remains in an extremely dysfunctional relationship with someone whom is very unstable. Despite repea...	serenity47	10	624	Mar 14, 2018 by serenity47
	Courage to Change March 14 (Preview) Good morning MIP! I'm traveling this week, so my posting timing is a bit off. The reading in Courage to Change for today is one of my very favorites. One beautiful day, a man sat down under a tree, but did not notice that the tree was full of pigeons. After a while, the pigeons did what pigeons do, and the m...	Skorpi	4	1358	Mar 14, 2018 by Aline
	Was it wrong to call my husband sponsor? (Preview) Hi All, I have been on the board a few times. I lost my PW so I had to re-register. I was Ann_M_Y but my new screen name is Ann_Y. I have not been to an in person meeting. I really have no excuse of why I haven't gone to one. My husband was sober for 3 months and he slipped. He drank yesterday and today. He goes fu...	Ann_Y	8	795	Mar 14, 2018 by Bo
	Update on Momma ( 1 2 ) (Preview) I made mention in passing that my mom had a slight stroke Friday night. My parents are 83 and have had a long and blessed life. However, they are both slipping just a bit mentally and I have used my program to not worry or fret too much. They are definitely on OPT (Old People Time) which means they go to be...	Iamhere	41	1244	Mar 14, 2018 by Iamhere
	In All My Affairs (Preview) I have been trying to focus on something within my job because I have been so utterly frustrated as of late and that is not working for me. First I have lacked motivation and I am frustrated over things I can't change which is other people. That's really been a tough one, so I have chosen to remain aloof h...	SerenityRUS	12	611	Mar 14, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Mar 11 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is a look at the phrase take care of yourself. I will admit that when I was just coming to the program and new to it, when someone told me to care for myself I typically responded with a (visible) eye roll. It seemed trite to me- of course I was taking care of myself bl...	yanksfan51	6	513	Mar 13, 2018 by hotrod
	ODAT Reading 3-13-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for March 13 speaks about the doubts and fears that we entertain once the alcoholic has achieved sobriety. The reading points out that this must be overcome, because this lack of confidence can do untold damage. It suggests that even if a relapse should happen,the injury is not to us...	hotrod	1	514	Mar 13, 2018 by Iamhere
	it is getting better... (Preview) Well things are improving slowly but surely. I am grateful that I am starting to sleep a little better. My mind is starting to clear a little after a long couple of weeks struggling w sleep. I feel better but still have to deal w long days. I have been reading more alanon literature. I have even studied...	Hoot Nanny	2	522	Mar 13, 2018 by Iamhere
	Trying to let go- not get angry (Preview) I have been with AH for over 20 years (married 19 last Nov) and he has been trying to quit drinking for a little over a year now. I know there are going to be relapses and I am usually not mad about that (disappointed, yes but mad, no because it does no good to be mad). So, at the first part of the year, AH was pres...	notrub1974	20	2402	Mar 13, 2018 by Iamhere
	Pressure Valve (Preview) So ABF is AWOL again. Relapsed 3 weeks after dragging his mum back from her holiday abroad to help her detox. Last time he relapsed he was suicidal so being AWOL and alone is obviously worrying for me. But this is about me, not him. I feel like I'm bottled up. I'm a can of fizzy pop being shaken and waiting t...	MizzB	6	556	Mar 13, 2018 by Bo
	In need of support (Preview) Good morning all. I've been in Al-Anon since December so I'm relatively new. Al-Anon has helped me a great deal both through meetings and the literature. I'm in real need of support today. My 21 year old son had 5 months of sobriety and relapsed a few days ago. At first it seemed like a slip and that h...	momsad	9	651	Mar 12, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	C2C, 3/12 (Preview) Detaching with love: The writer states that someone else's mood, tone, and/or state of inebriation does not have to effect his course of actions, unless he allows it. Alanon is teaching him that he does not have to react when provoked, nor take harsh words to heart . He can be in charge of his decisio...	Lyne	8	483	Mar 12, 2018 by momsad
	Now what? (Preview) Two years ago I had no job, was isolated, and was living with a mentally ill delusional alcoholic (AH) who was the main bread winner. Things were horrible so I decided to say yes to a few opportunities. My SIL got me a part time job, my other SIL invited us to join her bike group, and the delusional alcoholi...	Groo	8	539	Mar 12, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hospital bedside advice (Preview) As I sit at the bedside of my alcoholic fiancee as he is sedated because he is going through withdrawals. I'm struggling with how to handle things. I don't know what to do or say. I feel that his life is in jeopardy and I'm very scared. I know he needs to make a decision to get sober on his own. I'm definitel...	Itsjustme1988	8	562	Mar 12, 2018 by Iamhere
	New to Alanon (Preview) I have struggled with drinking for years but have been sober for 3 months. I am married to an alcoholic. I need to learn how to continue my sobriety and hopefully stay married because I love my husband but I dont know how to deal with my sobriety and him continuing to drink. He has had dui's and legal issues...	Need2believe17	7	508	Mar 12, 2018 by Iamhere
	ODAT Reading 3-10-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for today clearly states that we come to alanon to receive help from unbearable pain and suffering. Many of us believe this pain is caused by another, however since we are powerless over others, alanon directs us to look inward, to uncover what we are doing that is causing our pain. T...	hotrod	3	484	Mar 12, 2018 by Iamhere
	awful dream (Preview) I had an awful dream this morning. In the dream my ah left me. He said it was because we were arguing too much. Now I am awake & crying. I just want to share w someone out there. Now I have to bed. I haven't been sleeping well. It is 6:30 in the morning. I need to go back to sleep. Thanks for letting me s...	Hoot Nanny	4	422	Mar 12, 2018 by Iamhere
	Worried about feeling alone-ness (Preview) I'm writing as I recognised after a difficult Al-Anon meeting tonight, that one of the reasons I'm angry with my A is because I'm worried that my second marriage will break up and I fear that happening. I fear finding out that the boundaries my anger hides might make the decision for me, that I have to cal...	Belle Again	12	648	Mar 11, 2018 by Maresie
	Courage to Change March 9 (Preview) According to the index in c2c, today's reading falls under the topic "Confusion." The reading focuses on the confusion around what is hp's will for the reader and self will. The reading goes on to tell us that doubt is an unavoidable companion to spiritual seeking and encourages exploration and chal...	tiredtonite	1	469	Mar 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	ODAAT March 9 (Preview) Today's reading is about anger. The reading says losing our temper can be a disease too. It goes on to tell us that "anger-sickness" is an uncontrollable impuse to judge and condemn someone else. The reading likens it to an emotional explosion that brings temporary relief. It reminds the reader abou...	tiredtonite	1	398	Mar 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	Courage to change is making life worse.... (Preview) Today Iâm feeling defeated. The last week has been completely unbearable dealing with AH outbursts. Last night I lost my cool because he put me on the spot with a friend of his. He is at the point that he canât understand how to do new things. He arbitrarily decided that at THAT precise moment I was going t...	Elabella	23	738	Mar 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	future tripping (Preview) My AH is having I think age-related physical issues. It is so easy to think about how long he is going to be on this earth. I have been crying almost nonstop. It might be that I am so tired as well. So anyway easy does it right? & one day at a time. By the way he is 24 years older than I am & I am finally afte...	Hoot Nanny	2	477	Mar 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today March 9 (Preview) Today's reading is about unacceptable behavior. The writer shares about their experience growing up in an alcoholic home where they experienced unhealthy behaviors particularly criticism from others. They had trouble sorting out acceptable behavior from unacceptable behavior. The reading...	tiredtonite	12	575	Mar 10, 2018 by Iamhere
	A Vicious Cycle (Preview) When I am caught up in the obsession of what my AH is or isn't doing,there's problems between us(of course).My controlling ways cause many huge arguments and make me feel miserable.If I try to talk to him about anything he completely shuts me out and gives me the silent treatment.It's like a punishmen...	SoggySlippers	14	670	Mar 10, 2018 by pumkin26
	1 Yr, today! (Preview) Hi All, just thought I would pop up here today as it marks 1 yr of recovery- for ME. A year ago, crying and broken, mad and hurt- I would've never thought in a year this is where I would be- today I am very thankful for everyone here that helped me in those early days and overall very thankful and grateful to Al...	pumkin26	8	567	Mar 10, 2018 by pumkin26
	how to deal w not having kids? (Preview) Does anyone have any ESH on not having kids for one reason or another? Need to let go of the dream at 51?	Hoot Nanny	5	447	Mar 10, 2018 by MizzB
	Service Opportunity - Tomorrow (Preview) Hey all... I am on mobile and don't see where to send private messages... I usually post a daily each Thu and Fri, and have no literature with me... Can someone please take care of tomorrow? Thanks in advance...	Iamhere	4	447	Mar 9, 2018 by tiredtonite
	Courage to Change 3/8/18 (Preview) Today's reading is about learning and practicing to do and be different. The writer talks about how attending meetings helps us learn new ways of working our recovery program. She attended one, and the chairperson passed around a basket full of slogan. She asked that each person take one, and try...	Iamhere	3	440	Mar 8, 2018 by The1975jen
	Hope For Today 3/7/2018 (Preview) It isn't only about not drinking ...is it. I so related to this page and what he was sharing. Seeing the big picture is 20/20 eyesight. Gratitude lists are a must. (((hugs)))	Jerry F	4	476	Mar 8, 2018 by Iamhere
	1st Post Where to Start. Desperate!!! (Preview) I have never asked for help or guidance outside of HP. I've been reading posts upon more posts. My AH has progressed to the point of not being able to hold a job. We've been married 27 yrs. Raised 3 children who are all moved out. He progressively got to where we are now. He's always been addicted to one sub...	StarryAmmo	20	766	Mar 7, 2018 by Maresie
	Boundaries request isn't being respected (very long) (Preview) I have a 37 year old college educated daughter who suffers from what seems to be anxiety/depression/ocd exacerbated by alcoholism/prescription and other drug abuse, and a tragic history of domestic violence and sexual assault. She has seemingly adopted the emotional abuse which was heaped on he...	lgnutah	11	457	Mar 7, 2018 by Maresie
	Courage to Change March 7 (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change is about the beauty we each hold inside. The author shares that, after living with a disease of attitudes for a lifetime, they did not think that anything good would come out of their efforts, because they didn't have self confidence or self esteem. The author lea...	Skorpi	3	667	Mar 7, 2018 by Lyne
	A lesson in powerlessness (Preview) In my home group, we have been working the steps as a group on Thursday nights. I've found it useful to work through them again. Today, I came home from my Sunday meeting to a cheerful wife. We walked our Chloe, and met the neighbors from across the street for the first time. We stayed and chatted with the...	Skorpi	10	613	Mar 7, 2018 by Iamhere
	in the chatroom (Preview) Well I was in there & didn't know how to respond. Can anyone tell me how? I want to go back in there.	Hoot Nanny	10	480	Mar 6, 2018 by Hoot Nanny
	Responsibility Vs. Expectation (Preview) This one has really been on my mind lately especially as I deal with my oldest. What is the difference between the issue of Responsibility vs Expectation for me. In watching my oldest struggle pretty hard this past semester one thing I have really seen is that what are my expectations in terms of beha...	SerenityRUS	7	1161	Mar 6, 2018 by Maresie
	ODAT Reading 3-6-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for March 6 things about the importance of anonymity between Al-Anon members and while attending an Al-Anon meetings. The reading points out that what we hear in meetings or what is shared between each member must be held in confidence and kept locked in our minds and hearts, We can al...	hotrod	3	1526	Mar 6, 2018 by Lyne
	Still getting the hang of this (Preview) I accidentally posted in the business forum a while ago. I'm new to this. My husband is (was) a recovering alcoholic. When I met him he went to just about every meeting nearby. Work and other responsibilities reduced the times he attended. But if he ever started getting in a "mood", I would very nicely l...	CASphilbrook	5	457	Mar 6, 2018 by Iamhere
	When to seek a divorce? (Preview) Iâm really struggling with my husband. He is unable to stay sober, Iâm not sure at what point I should leave. Iâm new to all of this. Any advice ?	Jennifer617	11	1401	Mar 5, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	C2C reading 3-3-2018 (Preview) The C2C reading for March 3 speaks about the fourth step. The reading indicates that if we look inward deeply enough we may find that many of our attitudes, and actions and unrealistic, immature and childlike. It then goes on to explain what mature behavior looks like which includes: " knowing ours...	hotrod	12	2079	Mar 5, 2018 by hotrod
	Desperate for ESH... (Preview) So here I am hiding in my bedroom because Iâm avoiding AH who is on a complete rampage on me. He got angry at me when I suggested he should not come to friends of the family tonight. Our daughter is going over to sleepover. He wants to go over to have a talk with our friend. She is dealing with a lot today- havin...	Elabella	16	556	Mar 5, 2018 by MeTwo2
	Fiancé relapsed 90 days before wedding (Preview) So my story, my fiance slipped 4 weeks ago after being sober for 400+ days. We have known each other since we were 11, but had not been in touch for 20 years until we reconnected in 2016. When we first reconnected she told me that she was an alcoholic and was in recovery, at that time only for 6 months, but sh...	CedarTexas	18	649	Mar 5, 2018 by Iamhere
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.