Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Workingmama · Workingmama

Im not totally clear on how this site work. I have been afraid to go to a local meeting. We live in a small town and I dont know how to respect and protect my spouse while finding a support network for myself. does anyone have advice there? Are there sponsors in Alanon? My spouse is no longer drinking but t...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading discusses back to basics. Many of us who have wished, prayed and hoped for sobriety in our loved ones may have new 'life' concerns when/if recovery happens in our A. Many of us are dismayed when sobriety does not bring the happily-ever-after ending we've wanted and waited for. With...

Paloma Negra · Paloma Negra

Hi everyone, it's been a while since I've posted. Life with the A has been cyclical. He tries to not drink but eventually he starts (he thinks) "sneaking" bottles or cans when I'm at work, then the effusive personality when he has a plan set to get a 12-pack, the loud and/or angry drunk, then the remorsef...

courage101 · courage101

As my schedule changed 3 months ago, the daily meetings in the chat room here do not always have a chair person. Anyone is welcome to step up and hold a morning or night meeting. Usually 6 months of face-to-face meetings are required before chairing online. The meeting scripts are available at http://...

Donehurting · Donehurting

DUH! It's her drinking. Causes so many problems. But we can't talk about it? I've been in Al-Anon since Nov. and cannot wrap my head around this. She's been in AA since Nov. Sober for 3 months then thinks she can drink moderatly. Needless to say she's been wasted many times since... even after an AA meeti...

StarryAmmo · StarryAmmo

I'm only 3 months into my Al anon journey. My AH has not started his journey toward sobriety. I'm still learning how to handle situations and set Healthy Boundaries. This is what I've set into play so far. 1. I will do what I can to stop the drinking and driving. Every morning before he takes me to work I hav...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hello All- I apologize for not writing in last Sunday. I completely forgot! I woke up in the middle of the night realizing I forgot. I hope everyone enjoyed their day and the week since... I will get back to the daily this coming Sunday! Mary

Bo · Bo

I remember saying to my sponsor, how I was feeling better, really felt a lot of improvement, had a much better perspective and attitude, and so on. As we were talking about it, I said to him, but I am going to a lot of meetings, feeling somewhat that as I was feeling so good, I shouldn't have had to go to so man...

serenity47 · serenity47

I have always been one to jump in and try to fix situations and respond in the heat of the moment. I wanted to have everything aired out and tied up all neat and pretty. I would get bent out of shape and ruminate in my head again and again all the possible worst case scenarios that could happen if I didn't mak...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

I hope everyone enjoyed their easter weekend in whatever way you chose to celebrate it. I worked every day of it. I'm not complaining. I'm grateful to still have a job to go to. I work as a part-time attendant in a transition home for men in recovery from addictions. Whenever one of them completes our pro...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It is another beautiful morning! It is going to be another beautiful day! I have a feeling that it is just beginning. The fact is I am starting to change my sleep patterns. I feel more rested than I have been awhile.I iI really owe it to God & this program for getting this far. For that I am grateful.

Lyne · Lyne

Be gently with yourself: The writer learned that it is important to be kind to herself, especially when she was doing poorly. She said it is much easier to be gentle with herself when doing well. She said she feared that she would turn into a slug if she wasn't constantly pushing herself. But she lea...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Pre Alanon for me everything was urgent and it better be addressed right then .. it didn't matter how big or how small. There would be stuff that was just straight up stupid .. in terms of how important is it, or things that were important however waiting is a more appropriate response or just not respon...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Good morning all and a Good Friday also. Higher Power was setting up my day for me today which I never mind cause my HP is much more imaginative and alert than I ever have been. I needed to take the van down to the dealer to get a tire problem fixed and got the alert that it would not be free so I went into my r...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

What I am referring to is a spouse who is in the process of a divorce who "wants to be friends," whose working a recovery plan, but just can't seem to realize the amount of pain they have caused in their SO. I am about to enter the final phase of the divorce process - we've just finished the 30 day reply to summ...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Could not forget the MIP family on this day...getting ready to attend the AA at the Bay Easter Feaster (really!!)...after the meeting we will feast on the menu and each others ESH. This is a long lasting tradition for a meeting founded by both AA and Al-Anon over 25 years ago. Just heard from a trave...

Ann_Y · Ann_Y

My AH set himself a timeline. X is the last day he is drinking. I dont even know what to think.

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I was hoping that someone would write something about the C2C hope for today or the ODAT? I wanted to comment on the C2C for today March 31st but I won't because I did read it but I don't remember the whole thing! Have a great Easter weekend & the joy of Spring!

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I haven't given up on myself & my own recovery. Today is a better day! I will try to focus on this day only. I am grateful for an alanon friend & her daughter coming over to color easter eggs at my place. Not too many come inside my house unless I am up for it. It also depends who it is. I am feeling more...

Bo · Bo

and enjoying the day. Everything is wonderful. Life is wonderful. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, he falls into a hole that he did not see. The hole is so deep and the walls are so steep he can't get out. A doctor passes by, and the guy shouts up, "Doctor, Doctor, I'm stuck down here in this hole and I can't ge...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good evening MIP! Decided to post tomorrow's daily a little early, so here goes! The reading discusses how strange the concept of focusing on self appears when we first here it in Al-Anon. We wonder if others will see us as inconsiderate, thoughtless and/or uncaring. Many of us saw these same char...

AYoungLady · AYoungLady

*Hello everyone, I just wanted to update on my ex-fiance who was in treatment for addiction to Oxycontin. I had previously posted under the user name YoungLady but I lost the password and was unable to reset it.* _ My ex-fiance, now "boyfriend" is seven months sober from opiates. The past year was real...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Today's reading discusses kindness and respect towards self! So often, the voices in our heads tell us that we're not good enough or we don't speak the truth. These thoughts reflect the damaged self-esteem that results from living with alcoholism. When we recognize this, we can tell them to be qu...

joker · joker

How do I start this. I am finding having my own space so wonderful, peaceful, liberating. No-one to monitor me, tell me what to do, to please. I have been trying to process my feelings lately and its been so confusing. The new man I am dating said some things that really disturbed me. One is you talk to much...

Phil4008 · Phil4008

hi there , I am new to all this and really strufling to deal with it all , we have been together two year and she has been in recovery for 6 months , I feel I come fairly far down the list and we dont get time together, she hardly talks about it all and dont know how long it will be until we get back how she was when I...

MerryLee · MerryLee

Has this happened to someone else. Your spouse actually sexually abusing you and the emotional part was horrible. He has stepped away from t his type of behavior now .. I keep waiting for a I am sorry. Not heard it yet.. I get something like well i shouldnt have done it but you had made me so mad... I knew tha...

cat091313 · cat091313

I am very confused about something, and am looking for input/thoughts. The "Sick Man's Prayer" of the Big Book identifies the other person as sick and seeks God's help for him/her. But I am learning that I need to take responsibility and that in interactions the 'problem' is me - with my t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Today I am doing what I am told to do. I am per procedure for my future colonoscopy. I think I am ready to attempt the procedure. It won't be done right away. I am over 50 & my dad died of colon cancer in 2011. Pray for me that I make the right decision for me.

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading in Courage to Change, the author shares their perspective on the slogan "Let go and let God". The author reflects on the pain and exhaustion they cause them selves by holding only something too tightly. On the other hand, by letting go and trusting in their HP, they are free to engag...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for March 27 speaks about.occasionally going to meetings in a negative frame of mind and. when this happens, everybody seems to irritate us,.It is then important to realize that it is our attitude that is at fault. The reading suggests that we must go; back to -Anon fundamentals a...

Linknomi · Linknomi

I feel completely isolated and alone. This is going to be long, and honestly, I dont really expect anyone to read it, but I think just writing it all down will make me feel better. My husband and I have been together for around 9 years, married almost 3. He has always had issues with depression, but was ba...

Lyne · Lyne

Perfectionism, procrastination, and paralysis: The writer says these 3 elements are the worst effects of alcoholism upon his life. He avoids taking risks, avoids doing anything badly, and therefore misses out on things he enjoys and making progress. Today's Reminder: Alanon encourages me...

YARNCRAZY · YARNCRAZY

its been a long time since ive posted here. I thought since being divorced and x hubby not in sight I could sort of ignore Alanon. Yet its message of taking care of ones self is always with me. My present boyfriend who i have been living with for 1yr has way more problems[not alcohol/drugs] than i knew. We d...

GovnA · GovnA

My wife is an alcoholic and we are going through a hard time right now. She has been in rehab four times and it doesn't seem to help. She claims/states she doesn't want to stop drinking. I have been an enabler, and I know that - and I've made the tough decision to stop enabling her. A huge issue is, we now have...

Bristlecone · Bristlecone

When my son asked for money today, I said no. I should probably clarify that. He had a doctor appointment today and asked to borrow money for his office visit and a prescription he would need at the pharmacy. In the past when hes needed money, my heart would believe it was for gas, or cigarettes, or what...

el-cee · el-cee

My sons drinking has progressed to where he is drinking almost daily, mornings too. He lives with his gf and her 4yr old. He has court cases, unpaid fines and his relationship is going badly. His gf is enabling him, buying his drink and he has had the cheek to point that out ot her. Hes manipulating her big...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good Morning Everyone- Todays reading is a reminder that we have choices and decisions we can make in our lives. Although many of us struggle with whether or not we have control over situations that arise in our lives, the program helps us know that we have he strength and ability to make choices for ou...

GBwashere · GBwashere

Wow, it feels ridiculously selfish to be saying this. I met my wife 6 years ago and we bonded quickly. We were two women enjoying life. We traveled, went to wineries, and brew pubs, and were making friends. We were having fun. We married on the day it became legal and for the first time in my life I cou...

Bristlecone · Bristlecone

This helps me calm when I feel as though things are spiraling The Peace of Wild Things, by Wendell Berry When despair for the world grows in me and I wake in the night at the least sound in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be, I go and lie down where the wood drake rests in his beauty on the wat...

lookingup · lookingup

The ODAT reading for March 24. Speaks about the irrational fear and dread that we develop as a result of living with the disease of alcoholism. The reading points out that attending meetings and reading Al-Anon literature, such as "Al-Anon Faces Alcoholism" .our courage starts to seep back in. Yet...

gabigail · gabigail

Hey everyone, Its been a while since Ive been on this forum. I have been working with my AS for over year recovering from a liver transplant. Things were going really well after the transplant. She had been sober for a while and because she was so sick I was her caregiver. Perfect arrangement for some...

Ann_Y · Ann_Y

Husband sent me a goodbye letter say he wants to end it all tonight. I call 911. The cops show up and he made contact with one cop. The cop talk with him inside the house and verified that he was alive amd drunk. The cop steps outside and then He wont open the door so they won't break it down. They advised me to...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP....I'm starting with the thought for the day as it's one of my favorites - "The say that pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. If I learn to accept that pain is part of life, I will be better able to endure the difficult times and then move on, leaving the pain behind me." The quot...

hotrod · hotrod

Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Since I am going on a trip on Tuesday. Step 4 has been posted to the Step Board earlier than usual.Here is the link htt...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Well seems my oldest is starting to take flight and I couldn't be more proud .. I just pray this is not a reprieve until the next go around .. LOL. Pretty much looks like last semester is going to get wiped out based upon a meeting tomorrow with the Dean of Science and my fingers are crossed. I am so staying...

Wolfie55 · Wolfie55

It's no secret that I'm a member of Alanon and a member of AA. I went to my first Alanon meeting for the wrong reason. I was a sober member of AA who mistakenly thought that Alanon would be a great place to meet a woman who liked to take care of alcoholics. That did not go as well as I would have liked. But, as I sa...

PosiesandPuppies · PosiesandPuppies

Yup. 1 year ago today, I came back on this site. I could not remember my old screen-name, so I created a new one. I knew what I needed... but I was still driven insane. Insane from his lies, deceptions, gas-lighting. But also insane from my constant state of trying to "fix" him. "Fix" our marriage. Keepin...

mamakat71 · mamakat71

I have been trying to do life on my own and definitely found myself back in old uncomfortable places with my ah. I became tired of trying to "control" his drinking and just started focusing on my kids, grandkids, work and my interests. This was going ok for awhile, but then I am seeing that his drinkin...

Mattie · Mattie

I've been under a special amount of stress lately (see other thread!) and I've been reflecting on support systems. There have been a few times in my life when I really, urgently needed a lot of support. Like the time I was taking care of my parents single-handedly when they were terminally ill. I am a...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am concerned about my present condition. I feel stress upon stress! When I am having a good day, something trips me up! I really can't type all that I have to say! Just know this I am living minute to minute. I am so confused & feel lost. Prayers needed. I am hanging sometimes by a thread!

Setmyselffree · Setmyselffree

Hello people. 12 years in a relationship with an 8 year marriage, a 7 year old son, a 4 year old daughter. Iâve decided I cannot take anymore. But it never dawned on me my husband has a drinking problem after all these years until NOW. I feel like my whole time with him is a blur. Im not sure how it took 12 years...

Mattie · Mattie

Last spring my A ex-husband had a collapse and a long spell in the hospital. It wasn't clear whether he was going to pull through, but thankfully he did. He stopped drinking, and I wasn't sure if he was going to stay sober, because he has stopped drinking dozens, maybe hundreds of times before. But ap...

Faintly Falling · Faintly Falling

Vent alert!!! I cannot change who my brother-in-law is. It is very difficult to change how I deal with him as I help to mind his kids since my sister died. This week: - on Sunday we had confusion over pick up arrangements and he tried to put the blame on first, my 16-year-old nephew then, me. - he tried to fur...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. Today's reading talks about how many of us tend to ignore our own feelings to survive the disease of alcoholism. We often have lost touch with ourselves without really knowing it. As the disease progresses, we often pointed an accusing finger at the A in our lives for deserting us...

Ann_Y · Ann_Y

I am stuggling with "do I tell friends about my husband alcohol problems". My husband does not want me too bit I had to cancel a trip with a friend at last minute becuas

andromeda · andromeda

All things considered, my life looks great and, after a recent health scare, I am grateful to have found out that things are OK. But, I am constantly discontent. I cannot seem to be comfortable with my status quo, with my relationship with my bf, with my job, even with my friends. I constantly want th...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for March 20 speaks about the Al-Anon program being a spiritual idea. It points out that because we are willing to acknowledge that something or someone is "Greater "than we are and are willing to surrender to this power with humility this becomes a Spiritual idea. The reading sug...

Jerry F · Jerry F

It is often that my spouse and I read from our literature at breakfast as we start our day. I recommend the practice often...it sets the tone for this AFG member. The pages of the day in our readers were so comfortably right on that I practice reading s l o w l y and focusing on what the writer is getting a...

Skorpi · Skorpi

In today's reading in Courage to Change, a jogger is nearing the end of a run, and is quite tired. The jogger, who loves the beach, must decide to cross the dunes blocking their view of the beach, which would require more effort, or stay on the flat and easy path, but miss the view of the beach. The jogger li...

BeccaW97 · BeccaW97

Hi there, I'm new to Al-Anon. I have a dear friend whose daughter has been struggling with addiction for many years. This daughter is very manipulative and cannot be trusted to tell the truth. She refuses to live with my friend since she has finally set some boundaries for her self and her home so the dau...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Not Sure Where to Start (Preview) Im not totally clear on how this site work. I have been afraid to go to a local meeting. We live in a small town and I dont know how to respect and protect my spouse while finding a support network for myself. does anyone have advice there? Are there sponsors in Alanon? My spouse is no longer drinking but t...	Workingmama	7	743	Apr 5, 2018 by Iamhere
	Courage to Change 4/5/18 (Preview) Today's reading discusses back to basics. Many of us who have wished, prayed and hoped for sobriety in our loved ones may have new 'life' concerns when/if recovery happens in our A. Many of us are dismayed when sobriety does not bring the happily-ever-after ending we've wanted and waited for. With...	Iamhere	0	526	Apr 5, 2018 by Iamhere
	Some ESH would be great (Preview) Hi everyone, it's been a while since I've posted. Life with the A has been cyclical. He tries to not drink but eventually he starts (he thinks) "sneaking" bottles or cans when I'm at work, then the effusive personality when he has a plan set to get a 12-pack, the loud and/or angry drunk, then the remorsef...	Paloma Negra	2	688	Apr 5, 2018 by Skorpi
	Chat room service positions available (Preview) As my schedule changed 3 months ago, the daily meetings in the chat room here do not always have a chair person. Anyone is welcome to step up and hold a morning or night meeting. Usually 6 months of face-to-face meetings are required before chairing online. The meeting scripts are available at http://...	courage101	1	548	Apr 4, 2018 by Iamhere
	The Elephant in the Room (Preview) DUH! It's her drinking. Causes so many problems. But we can't talk about it? I've been in Al-Anon since Nov. and cannot wrap my head around this. She's been in AA since Nov. Sober for 3 months then thinks she can drink moderatly. Needless to say she's been wasted many times since... even after an AA meeti...	Donehurting	7	747	Apr 4, 2018 by Iamhere
	Need Insight: AH wants to Vacation without me (Preview) I'm only 3 months into my Al anon journey. My AH has not started his journey toward sobriety. I'm still learning how to handle situations and set Healthy Boundaries. This is what I've set into play so far. 1. I will do what I can to stop the drinking and driving. Every morning before he takes me to work I hav...	StarryAmmo	30	993	Apr 4, 2018 by Donehurting
	Sun Apr 1 (Preview) Hello All- I apologize for not writing in last Sunday. I completely forgot! I woke up in the middle of the night realizing I forgot. I hope everyone enjoyed their day and the week since... I will get back to the daily this coming Sunday! Mary	yanksfan51	1	545	Apr 4, 2018 by Iamhere
	Meeting makers make it... (Preview) I remember saying to my sponsor, how I was feeling better, really felt a lot of improvement, had a much better perspective and attitude, and so on. As we were talking about it, I said to him, but I am going to a lot of meetings, feeling somewhat that as I was feeling so good, I shouldn't have had to go to so man...	Bo	6	688	Apr 3, 2018 by Aline
	Practicing the Pause (Preview) I have always been one to jump in and try to fix situations and respond in the heat of the moment. I wanted to have everything aired out and tied up all neat and pretty. I would get bent out of shape and ruminate in my head again and again all the possible worst case scenarios that could happen if I didn't mak...	serenity47	5	797	Apr 3, 2018 by Lyne
	Gratitude (Preview) I hope everyone enjoyed their easter weekend in whatever way you chose to celebrate it. I worked every day of it. I'm not complaining. I'm grateful to still have a job to go to. I work as a part-time attendant in a transition home for men in recovery from addictions. Whenever one of them completes our pro...	Wolfie55	4	627	Apr 2, 2018 by Bo
	beautiful morning! (Preview) It is another beautiful morning! It is going to be another beautiful day! I have a feeling that it is just beginning. The fact is I am starting to change my sleep patterns. I feel more rested than I have been awhile.I iI really owe it to God & this program for getting this far. For that I am grateful.	Hoot Nanny	8	636	Apr 2, 2018 by Hoot Nanny
	C2C, 4/2 (Preview) Be gently with yourself: The writer learned that it is important to be kind to herself, especially when she was doing poorly. She said it is much easier to be gentle with herself when doing well. She said she feared that she would turn into a slug if she wasn't constantly pushing herself. But she lea...	Lyne	5	694	Apr 2, 2018 by Iamhere
	Timing (Preview) Pre Alanon for me everything was urgent and it better be addressed right then .. it didn't matter how big or how small. There would be stuff that was just straight up stupid .. in terms of how important is it, or things that were important however waiting is a more appropriate response or just not respon...	SerenityRUS	7	694	Apr 2, 2018 by hiraeth
	HP working it with me... (Preview) Good morning all and a Good Friday also. Higher Power was setting up my day for me today which I never mind cause my HP is much more imaginative and alert than I ever have been. I needed to take the van down to the dealer to get a tire problem fixed and got the alert that it would not be free so I went into my r...	Jerry F	7	671	Apr 2, 2018 by hiraeth
	Can Anyone Relate? (Preview) What I am referring to is a spouse who is in the process of a divorce who "wants to be friends," whose working a recovery plan, but just can't seem to realize the amount of pain they have caused in their SO. I am about to enter the final phase of the divorce process - we've just finished the 30 day reply to summ...	PosiesandPuppies	8	787	Apr 2, 2018 by hiraeth
	Happy peace of mind and serenity Easter from Hilo HI. (Preview) Could not forget the MIP family on this day...getting ready to attend the AA at the Bay Easter Feaster (really!!)...after the meeting we will feast on the menu and each others ESH. This is a long lasting tradition for a meeting founded by both AA and Al-Anon over 25 years ago. Just heard from a trave...	Jerry F	3	743	Apr 1, 2018 by Iamhere
	Setting timelines (Preview) My AH set himself a timeline. X is the last day he is drinking. I dont even know what to think.	Ann_Y	4	592	Apr 1, 2018 by Bo
	what happened to the dailies meditation? (Preview) I was hoping that someone would write something about the C2C hope for today or the ODAT? I wanted to comment on the C2C for today March 31st but I won't because I did read it but I don't remember the whole thing! Have a great Easter weekend & the joy of Spring!	Hoot Nanny	2	585	Mar 31, 2018 by Iamhere
	it gets better if you don't give up!i (Preview) I haven't given up on myself & my own recovery. Today is a better day! I will try to focus on this day only. I am grateful for an alanon friend & her daughter coming over to color easter eggs at my place. Not too many come inside my house unless I am up for it. It also depends who it is. I am feeling more...	Hoot Nanny	7	622	Mar 31, 2018 by Iamhere
	A guy is walking down the street... (Preview) and enjoying the day. Everything is wonderful. Life is wonderful. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, he falls into a hole that he did not see. The hole is so deep and the walls are so steep he can't get out. A doctor passes by, and the guy shouts up, "Doctor, Doctor, I'm stuck down here in this hole and I can't ge...	Bo	4	694	Mar 31, 2018 by DavidG
	Courage to Change 3/30/18 (Preview) Good evening MIP! Decided to post tomorrow's daily a little early, so here goes! The reading discusses how strange the concept of focusing on self appears when we first here it in Al-Anon. We wonder if others will see us as inconsiderate, thoughtless and/or uncaring. Many of us saw these same char...	Iamhere	7	670	Mar 31, 2018 by Iamhere
	Fiance in Recovery, Question for Partners of Recovering Addicts addiction recovery relationships opiates advice forgiveness healing (Preview) Hello everyone, I just wanted to update on my ex-fiance who was in treatment for addiction to Oxycontin. I had previously posted under the user name YoungLady but I lost the password and was unable to reset it. _ My ex-fiance, now "boyfriend" is seven months sober from opiates. The past year was real...	AYoungLady	18	11190	Mar 29, 2018 by Jerry F
	Courage to Change 3/29/18 (Preview) Today's reading discusses kindness and respect towards self! So often, the voices in our heads tell us that we're not good enough or we don't speak the truth. These thoughts reflect the damaged self-esteem that results from living with alcoholism. When we recognize this, we can tell them to be qu...	Iamhere	4	573	Mar 29, 2018 by Stan1
	Need to slow down (Preview) How do I start this. I am finding having my own space so wonderful, peaceful, liberating. No-one to monitor me, tell me what to do, to please. I have been trying to process my feelings lately and its been so confusing. The new man I am dating said some things that really disturbed me. One is you talk to much...	joker	8	780	Mar 29, 2018 by el-cee
	New to this (Preview) hi there , I am new to all this and really strufling to deal with it all , we have been together two year and she has been in recovery for 6 months , I feel I come fairly far down the list and we dont get time together, she hardly talks about it all and dont know how long it will be until we get back how she was when I...	Phil4008	9	697	Mar 29, 2018 by Bo
	Spouse so sexually and emotionally abusive /sober now /Will forgive and forget (Preview) Has this happened to someone else. Your spouse actually sexually abusing you and the emotional part was horrible. He has stepped away from t his type of behavior now .. I keep waiting for a I am sorry. Not heard it yet.. I get something like well i shouldnt have done it but you had made me so mad... I knew tha...	MerryLee	6	723	Mar 29, 2018 by MeTwo2
	Question about "Sick Man's Prayer" (Preview) I am very confused about something, and am looking for input/thoughts. The "Sick Man's Prayer" of the Big Book identifies the other person as sick and seeks God's help for him/her. But I am learning that I need to take responsibility and that in interactions the 'problem' is me - with my t...	cat091313	7	7135	Mar 28, 2018 by Iamhere
	doing what i am told (Preview) Today I am doing what I am told to do. I am per procedure for my future colonoscopy. I think I am ready to attempt the procedure. It won't be done right away. I am over 50 & my dad died of colon cancer in 2011. Pray for me that I make the right decision for me.	Hoot Nanny	5	622	Mar 28, 2018 by Hoot Nanny
	Courage to Change March 28 (Preview) In today's reading in Courage to Change, the author shares their perspective on the slogan "Let go and let God". The author reflects on the pain and exhaustion they cause them selves by holding only something too tightly. On the other hand, by letting go and trusting in their HP, they are free to engag...	Skorpi	3	575	Mar 28, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	ODAT Reading 3-27-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for March 27 speaks about.occasionally going to meetings in a negative frame of mind and. when this happens, everybody seems to irritate us,.It is then important to realize that it is our attitude that is at fault. The reading suggests that we must go; back to -Anon fundamentals a...	hotrod	4	609	Mar 28, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	First post (Long) (Preview) I feel completely isolated and alone. This is going to be long, and honestly, I dont really expect anyone to read it, but I think just writing it all down will make me feel better. My husband and I have been together for around 9 years, married almost 3. He has always had issues with depression, but was ba...	Linknomi	5	721	Mar 27, 2018 by Maresie
	C2C, 3/26 (Preview) Perfectionism, procrastination, and paralysis: The writer says these 3 elements are the worst effects of alcoholism upon his life. He avoids taking risks, avoids doing anything badly, and therefore misses out on things he enjoys and making progress. Today's Reminder: Alanon encourages me...	Lyne	9	757	Mar 27, 2018 by Iamhere
	Grateful (Preview) its been a long time since ive posted here. I thought since being divorced and x hubby not in sight I could sort of ignore Alanon. Yet its message of taking care of ones self is always with me. My present boyfriend who i have been living with for 1yr has way more problems[not alcohol/drugs] than i knew. We d...	YARNCRAZY	4	634	Mar 27, 2018 by Iamhere
	Tough Love (Preview) My wife is an alcoholic and we are going through a hard time right now. She has been in rehab four times and it doesn't seem to help. She claims/states she doesn't want to stop drinking. I have been an enabler, and I know that - and I've made the tough decision to stop enabling her. A huge issue is, we now have...	GovnA	33	1403	Mar 27, 2018 by Jerry F
	A Small Step (Preview) When my son asked for money today, I said no. I should probably clarify that. He had a doctor appointment today and asked to borrow money for his office visit and a prescription he would need at the pharmacy. In the past when hes needed money, my heart would believe it was for gas, or cigarettes, or what...	Bristlecone	9	689	Mar 27, 2018 by Jerry F
	Any Al-anon suggestions? (Preview) My sons drinking has progressed to where he is drinking almost daily, mornings too. He lives with his gf and her 4yr old. He has court cases, unpaid fines and his relationship is going badly. His gf is enabling him, buying his drink and he has had the cheek to point that out ot her. Hes manipulating her big...	el-cee	10	779	Mar 27, 2018 by serenity47
	Hope For Today Mar 25 (Preview) Good Morning Everyone- Todays reading is a reminder that we have choices and decisions we can make in our lives. Although many of us struggle with whether or not we have control over situations that arise in our lives, the program helps us know that we have he strength and ability to make choices for ou...	yanksfan51	5	663	Mar 26, 2018 by bud
	Unhappy (Preview) Wow, it feels ridiculously selfish to be saying this. I met my wife 6 years ago and we bonded quickly. We were two women enjoying life. We traveled, went to wineries, and brew pubs, and were making friends. We were having fun. We married on the day it became legal and for the first time in my life I cou...	GBwashere	8	695	Mar 26, 2018 by Bo
	My thought for today (Preview) This helps me calm when I feel as though things are spiraling The Peace of Wild Things, by Wendell Berry When despair for the world grows in me and I wake in the night at the least sound in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be, I go and lie down where the wood drake rests in his beauty on the wat...	Bristlecone	4	565	Mar 25, 2018 by hotrod
	03/24/18 (Preview) The ODAT reading for March 24. Speaks about the irrational fear and dread that we develop as a result of living with the disease of alcoholism. The reading points out that attending meetings and reading Al-Anon literature, such as "Al-Anon Faces Alcoholism" .our courage starts to seep back in. Yet...	lookingup	5	629	Mar 25, 2018 by Stan1
	Dry drunk syndrome (Preview) Hey everyone, Its been a while since Ive been on this forum. I have been working with my AS for over year recovering from a liver transplant. Things were going really well after the transplant. She had been sober for a while and because she was so sick I was her caregiver. Perfect arrangement for some...	gabigail	3	783	Mar 25, 2018 by Bo
	Husband sent me an email that has me worried (Preview) Husband sent me a goodbye letter say he wants to end it all tonight. I call 911. The cops show up and he made contact with one cop. The cop talk with him inside the house and verified that he was alive amd drunk. The cop steps outside and then He wont open the door so they won't break it down. They advised me to...	Ann_Y	9	707	Mar 24, 2018 by hotrod
	Courage to Change 3/23/18 (Preview) Good morning MIP....I'm starting with the thought for the day as it's one of my favorites - "The say that pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. If I learn to accept that pain is part of life, I will be better able to endure the difficult times and then move on, leaving the pain behind me." The quot...	Iamhere	5	630	Mar 24, 2018 by Iamhere
	Step 4 (Preview) Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Since I am going on a trip on Tuesday. Step 4 has been posted to the Step Board earlier than usual.Here is the link htt...	hotrod	0	576	Mar 24, 2018 by hotrod
	Good Stuff (Preview) Well seems my oldest is starting to take flight and I couldn't be more proud .. I just pray this is not a reprieve until the next go around .. LOL. Pretty much looks like last semester is going to get wiped out based upon a meeting tomorrow with the Dean of Science and my fingers are crossed. I am so staying...	SerenityRUS	4	561	Mar 23, 2018 by Jerry F
	Bedtime Story (Preview) It's no secret that I'm a member of Alanon and a member of AA. I went to my first Alanon meeting for the wrong reason. I was a sober member of AA who mistakenly thought that Alanon would be a great place to meet a woman who liked to take care of alcoholics. That did not go as well as I would have liked. But, as I sa...	Wolfie55	5	673	Mar 23, 2018 by Aline
	Today is my 1 year anniversary here! (Preview) Yup. 1 year ago today, I came back on this site. I could not remember my old screen-name, so I created a new one. I knew what I needed... but I was still driven insane. Insane from his lies, deceptions, gas-lighting. But also insane from my constant state of trying to "fix" him. "Fix" our marriage. Keepin...	PosiesandPuppies	15	765	Mar 23, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Been awhile (Preview) I have been trying to do life on my own and definitely found myself back in old uncomfortable places with my ah. I became tired of trying to "control" his drinking and just started focusing on my kids, grandkids, work and my interests. This was going ok for awhile, but then I am seeing that his drinkin...	mamakat71	4	615	Mar 23, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	Reflecting on support (Preview) I've been under a special amount of stress lately (see other thread!) and I've been reflecting on support systems. There have been a few times in my life when I really, urgently needed a lot of support. Like the time I was taking care of my parents single-handedly when they were terminally ill. I am a...	Mattie	10	621	Mar 23, 2018 by el-cee
	I hope I can get through this. (Preview) I am concerned about my present condition. I feel stress upon stress! When I am having a good day, something trips me up! I really can't type all that I have to say! Just know this I am living minute to minute. I am so confused & feel lost. Prayers needed. I am hanging sometimes by a thread!	Hoot Nanny	11	624	Mar 22, 2018 by Maresie
	Denial sucks- divorce on the horizon (Preview) Hello people. 12 years in a relationship with an 8 year marriage, a 7 year old son, a 4 year old daughter. Iâve decided I cannot take anymore. But it never dawned on me my husband has a drinking problem after all these years until NOW. I feel like my whole time with him is a blur. Im not sure how it took 12 years...	Setmyselffree	8	741	Mar 22, 2018 by Jen61
	The sad day I hoped I'd never have to face (Preview) Last spring my A ex-husband had a collapse and a long spell in the hospital. It wasn't clear whether he was going to pull through, but thankfully he did. He stopped drinking, and I wasn't sure if he was going to stay sober, because he has stopped drinking dozens, maybe hundreds of times before. But ap...	Mattie	27	913	Mar 22, 2018 by Mattie
	I am fed up dealing with my brother-in-law (Preview) Vent alert!!! I cannot change who my brother-in-law is. It is very difficult to change how I deal with him as I help to mind his kids since my sister died. This week: - on Sunday we had confusion over pick up arrangements and he tried to put the blame on first, my 16-year-old nephew then, me. - he tried to fur...	Faintly Falling	5	766	Mar 22, 2018 by el-cee
	Courage to Change 3/22/19 (Preview) Good morning MIP. Today's reading talks about how many of us tend to ignore our own feelings to survive the disease of alcoholism. We often have lost touch with ourselves without really knowing it. As the disease progresses, we often pointed an accusing finger at the A in our lives for deserting us...	Iamhere	1	683	Mar 22, 2018 by hotrod
	What do you say to friend? (Preview) I am stuggling with "do I tell friends about my husband alcohol problems". My husband does not want me too bit I had to cancel a trip with a friend at last minute becuas	Ann_Y	12	902	Mar 22, 2018 by Ann_Y
	Struggling with discontent (Preview) All things considered, my life looks great and, after a recent health scare, I am grateful to have found out that things are OK. But, I am constantly discontent. I cannot seem to be comfortable with my status quo, with my relationship with my bf, with my job, even with my friends. I constantly want th...	andromeda	14	934	Mar 21, 2018 by andromeda
	ODAT reading 3-20-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for March 20 speaks about the Al-Anon program being a spiritual idea. It points out that because we are willing to acknowledge that something or someone is "Greater "than we are and are willing to surrender to this power with humility this becomes a Spiritual idea. The reading sug...	hotrod	11	684	Mar 21, 2018 by hotrod
	Breakfast readings... (Preview) It is often that my spouse and I read from our literature at breakfast as we start our day. I recommend the practice often...it sets the tone for this AFG member. The pages of the day in our readers were so comfortably right on that I practice reading s l o w l y and focusing on what the writer is getting a...	Jerry F	7	691	Mar 21, 2018 by Jerry F
	Courage to Change March 21 (Preview) In today's reading in Courage to Change, a jogger is nearing the end of a run, and is quite tired. The jogger, who loves the beach, must decide to cross the dunes blocking their view of the beach, which would require more effort, or stay on the flat and easy path, but miss the view of the beach. The jogger li...	Skorpi	3	596	Mar 21, 2018 by PosiesandPuppies
	Is keeping a child from entering the foster system ENABLING? (Preview) Hi there, I'm new to Al-Anon. I have a dear friend whose daughter has been struggling with addiction for many years. This daughter is very manipulative and cannot be trusted to tell the truth. She refuses to live with my friend since she has finally set some boundaries for her self and her home so the dau...	BeccaW97	6	739	Mar 20, 2018 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.