Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

shadow1 · shadow1

Today is a very sad day for my family and me. It is the one-year anniversary of my young brother in law’s death. He was a 28-year-old motorcycle instructor that had a passion for motorcycles. When I met him, he was only 7 year old and I watched him grow up to be an outstanding young man that loved life...

AH27 · AH27

Sorry- this is very, very long Hello everyone! I think this is where I need to be. I attended a few alanon meetings over a year ago, but I have since moved to an area where we don't have a chapter. Anyway, I think I just need to share my experience so that I can help clarify it for myself.&nb...

twinkie · twinkie

hi - i've really enjoyed reading your posts...they have given me a lot to think about and much learning. I'm new to this, just a month of so. Have been involved with A for 7 months - it was a whirlwind relationship and I was swept off my feet. Even moved three hours away to be with him.&n...

mommaof2 · mommaof2

I'm very new to this to please forgive me if I did this wrong or messed up in anyway shape or form. I had quite a night with my Alcoholic husband. See, he went out with his sister (also alcoholic). I knew full well what was going to happen, but I didn't try to control him. As well as my feelings. ...

RedHead · RedHead

I have so many questions while I'm trying to work the al-anon program. I know that we are not suppose to pay their bills but what if it's a bill that they are responsible for like the utilities...the A doesn't pay them and the utility gets shut off. This happens ALOT. I have two kids at home. I HAVE to get the...

desparate · desparate

Hi all~ This is my first time using anything like this, so I hope I'm figuring it out right. I decided to write because I need objective folks to talk with about my partner's drinking. See, my Dad drinks (5 scotches/night) he started in his 30's (I thought if you were an alcoholic it w...

Shocked · Shocked

I posted on another forum for Adult children but they said to come to this one. My grown son who has been fighting addiction for 20 years, he is 30 years old, was on his way yesterday to go to a faith based rehab. He had a 5 hour layover in Memphis,Tn and imagine this, he got lost, no one can find him, or anythin...

RedHead · RedHead

I am new to Al-anon and this board. After 13 years of living with an alcoholic, I hit MY rock bottom. I was lonely and my life felt so out of control. I used to pray to God..actually BEGGED God to cure my husband and would get angry when my prayers weren't answered. He did finally answer...

Gailey · Gailey

I SURE HOPE SO!!!! Last night I attended a new f2f. It was great. There were about 16 people in the meeting. It was a "speaker" meeting and the speaker was a woman with a 40 year old A son. She has been in Alanon for 23 years...since her son was 17 years old. Isn't that amazing??? She proceeded to spe...

nmike · nmike

I took Christy's challenge of having a great day. Focus on myself. Be all I can be. I did my long run around the lake in the morn. The geese and ducks are definitely on the move south. I went to my office to catch up and be ready for Monday. I spent 7 hours there. I pushed myself to attack those tasks that I avoid...

Gailey · Gailey

LOL...LOL...LOL!!! I cannot believe you found a weeble. It is soooo cute!!!!

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) I was sharing with my sponsor some of my crazyness from the weekend and I had a memory pop up and suprise me. Weebles... for those of you who don't remember, were little egg shaped people that had weights in the bottom. The kind of toy a little tyke would play with the right wa...

hersh · hersh

((((Hi everyone)))) Hope you all had some serenity over the weekend. Well after getting away to my motel last weekend after finding out the "affair" was real - I finally confronted AH about it and told him I knew it really happened now. I told him I needed some more time to digest, he sa...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

I am trying so hard not to get angry. I have to work tonite from 9pm to noon tuesday. The old man was suspicious last nite. If I was in another room , he would come look for me. He said where was the boss lady, She must have a boyfreind is why she is not working weekends. Sheesh she is there Fridays & Sunda...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Hi everyone, My AH is on his way back to the east coast from AZ and begging to stay (I just moved out of our house 3 weeks ago). I have been dreading the actual face to face confrontation which I know is coming. I find it a lot easier to be stong over the phone and in writing but face to face is har...

AlaMom · AlaMom

It seems like forever since I have been to this board. Home puter is on the fritz and work has been busy. I find myself pushing aside work to get this out of my head because it is starting to consume me. My sister and I had plans to attend a concert of my 2 favorite bands tomorrow night....

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

I am really sad today. Except for a couple of short conversations about bills, I haven't talked to my AH in 5 weeks. I have been doing really well this time, but of course this is only after being kicked out of the house for the zillionth time. I have been reading my alanon literature,...

drucilla06 · drucilla06

Hello (((family))) I watched a movie today about a woman who awoke from a 20 year coma.Ironically,I could relate.I am very much feeling as if I have been asleep for over 30 years.Has anyone else felt that way? I didn't know I had the right to stand up for myself and go after what I want or what is best fo...

peewee · peewee

Hi all, I wanted to let you know that Joni21 asked me by way of a letter to say hi and love and misses you all. Peewee

irish54 · irish54

I have been coming to this board for almost a year now. sometimes I sign in and sometimes I don't. But, I ALWAYS read your posts. I come when I am down and out and your posts lift me up. It just doesn't get any better than a family like this!!!

Thank you all...

Diva · Diva

Not long ago, after a two-day binge and the process of sobering was completed, A and I had a little talk. Well, perhaps I should say I had a talk. He never has much to say except the occasional, "Maybe I just ought to leave." After I had my talk with myself, he answered, "Well, I have always done everything y...

serendipity · serendipity

wednesday night my ex ah called and we talked and i stayed in my program. for the most part. but he was getting drunker as we spoke and i finally just told him that he is not a victim. that he has choices. that this is his life and he is a grown up and can do what he wants. the only true vicitms in this are the child...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Well after what I considered a big step of leting go on Friday, I tripped a bit on detachment and plan b today. I wanted to go see my brother today in another city, (I think I really wanted to run away LOL ), but I asked my AW if she wanted to go. My brother is in the military and wil...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((((((Family)))))))))))))))), Good morning!

This time last year I did a post called "Blame it on Karilynn". Well I have decided that this is going to be an annual event. This may sound silly, but hang in there with me. Here's the deal: Ever...

irish54 · irish54

Hi everyone. Thought I would update y'all a little on the situation with my daughter and grandaughter who lost their father/husband this summer. Friday I received an email from my grandaughter who said she missed us very much and that her mom had a new "friend". she said she didn't lik...

Christy · Christy

((friends))) I see a lot of hurt and pain on the board lately so I had an idea. Take what you like and leave the rest. I have a challenge for everyone. Just for today... Be the person you want to be, no baggage, strong and solid. See and BE that person. Envision and act joyous and carefree. ...

ditto · ditto

I am completely confused. I don't think I will ever understand how an alcoholic thinks. My A husband and I were divorced this past June (3 months ago). It has actually been a very pleasant experience being rid of him. I no longer face worries about his health, what he will do w...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

Why am I bothering? why am I trying to get Tina a ride home. She has been housesitting in Columbus since Wed. I got off work Wed at 6pm & took her up there around 8 to 9 pm. I then took our neighbor to the grocery store. I got home around 11pm. I had to get up around 4:30am Thursday & Friday to get to every...

TLC2 · TLC2

I was having a really crappy day two days ago, right from the early morning till evening. I came here, didn't even vent, just read your posts. Just seeing all the love and support in this room made me feel sooo much better!! Thanks family, Love Ya! TLC

mastiff · mastiff

Hi all, it's so wonderful to come here and to meetings and to hear es&h. It's such a breath of fresh air to know I'm not the fault of the world like sometime the a and my family of origion makes me feel. My a's quiting tobacco products, or rather was, this whole weekend, I don't think i've s...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

YOu know, I was thinking he sure is a good excuse, I can't do or I haven't done (fill in the blank) because of him! When hes gone I feel like I can do anything I have no limits. I also have no one to blame or to expect to do things I know they will never do so I just do them myself and thin...

hersh · hersh

(((Hi everyone and happy Friday!!!)))) It's been another tough week, but I finally had enough of the drama and went to a motel last night. You know, it was SO peaceful I cannot even believe it. I am tired of talking about the situation, just want to be alone and quiet. I told a great...

david62 · david62

Howdy (((((Everyone)))))) I just felt like posting something this morning about my experience last week. Been a busy week and I am just now sitting down and catching my breath for real! LOL. I was one of the luckies that got to meet a group of people from MIP in San Antonio last weekend. Six of us...

horselover58 · horselover58

I need some help. I cannot sign into the alanon chatroom. Says my host name is banned, that I am spam or abuser? Can't figure that one out. Any ideas?????? Email me,I will keep trying. Thanks, Deb

cytagirl · cytagirl

It's been a while since i last posted on here , though i regularly read the posts and thought i was learning how to cope with the situation i am in ... how wrong i was Living in Cyprus , i have no means of attending a meeting , the only one i found was 50 ks away from me , held on a mond...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

hello everyone, i looked up the date of my first post on the message board and that was oct.1,2005 in the post i was looking for a sponsor and mentioned i was in the program for three weeks at that time. so i guess im happy to say its my one year anniversary since finding alanon!!!!! yay. im so thankful for ev...

Lindy · Lindy

My AH has been laid off from work going on three weeks now. At first he was actually doing some work in the garage and keeping himself busy. I knew it wouldn't last. Now he's been drunk when I return home. It's taking every ounce of energy I have to keep going until I can get divorced and get him out of my life....

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I think I had already been detaching for a long time before leaving. He had been sober for 10mos and when he went on a runner in June and disappeared for 4 days I wasn't even concerned. It usually starts out as a pain in the pit of my stomach and then I start checking - calling, checking the credit cards, look...

tedley · tedley

I am not much one for posting to boards, going to meetings, or forgetting. But I am at wits end and I am... well I just don't know. So, My wife is an alcoholic. Dry now for almost 4 months and that is great. But that is the difficult part as well. She is involved in local AA meetings and I have been to a few to...

DoN4me · DoN4me

ok time to tell you my story of what brought me here. I meet my son's father many many years ago. I had fallen for him he was my moon and my stars. But he was an active A. He was abusive both verbal and physical. So when I couldn't take it anymore. He was cheating on me, and the straw was wh...

daisy2 · daisy2

" There's one flaw in women,".................. By the time the Lord made woman, he was into His sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?" And the Lord answered, "Have you seen My spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but no...

maresie · maresie

I used to really want to be the center of the A's life to be there for him. As some of you know the A has a mother who while she is an enabler never is "there" for him. When he was really illl(with a muscle condition) she gave him a chocolate bar and told him that it would all be ok. She left me to deal with it...

troubleandcheetah · troubleandcheetah

I need some advice about my brother. Let me give a little backstory. My brother is addicted to crack/cocaine and he came to me and my parents in March of this year and told his that he wanted help. My parents sent him to a drug rehab program for a month and then when he was released he mov...

rtexas · rtexas

(((((Everyone))))) Well... our story begins with 3 straight weeks of raging over the realization that our main character is NOT going to stop going to Al-Anon while living with an active A. The A is completely distraught and for the 8th time this year has declared the decission to move out on her o...

DoN4me · DoN4me

I have noticed since I have started the program. I have been full of all kinds of emotions. I express myself alot more. I say what I mean blunt and to the point. I never used to talk this way. I would always find a nice way to put things to afraid of offending someone somewhere. I just always looked at it as bee...

LadyLibra · LadyLibra

A is out of the house again and I feel relieved but at the same time feel sad...can anyone relate to that? The sadness feels like tears that start in my stomach travels up to my throat and comes out my eyes. He left Monday and I have only heard from him once and he called to say he has a new lease on life...

artygirl · artygirl

Hello I'm having a rough night here. I served my A/Cocaine-addicted hubby with divorce papers last week. This week he's been begging for another chance. I just had a conversation with him tonight and said I just can't go through anymore pain and disrespect, and I'm not sure I can ever trust him again. H...

maresie · maresie

I have really been trying to work on the martyr issue which is ingrained for me in dealing with the A and others. I feel I was really trained and schooled to be a martyr by my family of origin. I would alternate with the A between being a martyr (I could no give him enough) to railing and raging a...

Tammy · Tammy

I have to ask myself this.. Is loving an alcoholic worth what you loose ? My husband the alcoholic in my life can be so mean at times.. He calls me names and makes me feel like dirt. Other days he is as nice as he can be. We started counseling as our marriage has fallin apart and we are hanging on by a thread. I...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

AH has truck in both our names somewhere in AZ. He is going to treatment. No payments have or will be made. Also he got a DUI in Alabama on the way I found out. What do I need to do to CMA? Not sure what my responsiblity is here but I know I'm not paying for a vehicle I don't have.

Barbara · Barbara

were you officially diagnosed? and what did they do for you?

Barbara · Barbara

When attending a weekly meeting we're stuck in either a step or begineer meeting. Sometimes a discussion. But at conventions there is usually a choice of 3 meetings to attend at the same time.

maire rua · maire rua

Dear All, My ex-A was just rubbing it in a few weeks ago how he had seen my alcoholic brother in Ennis and he was looking great , in a suit, and everything. This was meant to minimise to me just how bad this guys problems are. Yet last week my son told me that my brother had cut loose and gone to another brothe...

sandie123 · sandie123

I got the following quip in the mail today. It really fits in with what I have been struggling with lately... self-esteem. We are better than we know. If we can be made to see it, perhaps for the rest of our lives, we will be unwilling to settle for less. -- Anonymous We are wonderful...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, When I was growing up my mother cleaned up after and enabled my Afather so much that even as a child I couldn't understand it. She was and still is completely codependant in his shadow for a lifetime. I remember at a young age vowing to myself that I would never end up like that. Yet here...

lebe27 · lebe27

Hi all, Well since A went back to drinking earlier this week all hell has broken loose. He had been sober for 7 weeks but had just shut himself in the house and avoided all outside contact in order to do it. Now all his looser friends are back. He has been in the woods cutting firewood...

Gailey · Gailey

I have been in a very low mood for the past several weeks...well actually it seems for my whole life. I have never thought of myself as being depressed. I had always thought that I felt the way I do because of circumstances in my life. I am now starting to think differently. As a child I remember my mom b...

Christy · Christy

(((friends))) My husband e-mailed me this song this morning and I sat here and cried through it. Believe it or not, it's uplifting..lol Thought I'd share some happy stuff, we all need that!! :) *sigh, 15 more days till he comes home for visit but his daughter is getting married so we have to travel. I don...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Well he has been missing for about a week and I haven't really thought about it much just every now and again wondering if he's ok and then today I listen to a message from his mother saying that a guy from AA in Arizona called her to say he's ok and getting into rehab on Saturday. Now I found that I was E...

peewee · peewee

Oh boy oh boy I am on overload with the subject of "codyness". A family member other than myself raised cody, acoa, seems is trying to pass on codependence to everyone else too. Is that possible? Is this a family disease right along with alcoholism? Not to imply that I myself...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	A sad day (Preview) Today is a very sad day for my family and me. It is the one-year anniversary of my young brother in law’s death. He was a 28-year-old motorcycle instructor that had a passion for motorcycles. When I met him, he was only 7 year old and I watched him grow up to be an outstanding young man that loved life...	shadow1	8	407	Sep 20, 2006 by leo
	alcholic husband while pregnant/ need feedback (Preview) Sorry- this is very, very long Hello everyone! I think this is where I need to be. I attended a few alanon meetings over a year ago, but I have since moved to an area where we don't have a chapter. Anyway, I think I just need to share my experience so that I can help clarify it for myself.&nb...	AH27	9	492	Sep 20, 2006 by nycbt
	feeling sad...need some hope (Preview) hi - i've really enjoyed reading your posts...they have given me a lot to think about and much learning. I'm new to this, just a month of so. Have been involved with A for 7 months - it was a whirlwind relationship and I was swept off my feet. Even moved three hours away to be with him.&n...	twinkie	10	427	Sep 20, 2006 by nycbt
	feeling used and abused, little confused (Preview) I'm very new to this to please forgive me if I did this wrong or messed up in anyway shape or form. I had quite a night with my Alcoholic husband. See, he went out with his sister (also alcoholic). I knew full well what was going to happen, but I didn't try to control him. As well as my feelings. ...	mommaof2	8	391	Sep 20, 2006 by nycbt
	Paying their debt (Preview) I have so many questions while I'm trying to work the al-anon program. I know that we are not suppose to pay their bills but what if it's a bill that they are responsible for like the utilities...the A doesn't pay them and the utility gets shut off. This happens ALOT. I have two kids at home. I HAVE to get the...	RedHead	10	415	Sep 20, 2006 by nycbt
	life love drinks (Preview) Hi all~ This is my first time using anything like this, so I hope I'm figuring it out right. I decided to write because I need objective folks to talk with about my partner's drinking. See, my Dad drinks (5 scotches/night) he started in his 30's (I thought if you were an alcoholic it w...	desparate	7	423	Sep 20, 2006 by nycbt
	Need Advice Asap on This Post! (Preview) I posted on another forum for Adult children but they said to come to this one. My grown son who has been fighting addiction for 20 years, he is 30 years old, was on his way yesterday to go to a faith based rehab. He had a 5 hour layover in Memphis,Tn and imagine this, he got lost, no one can find him, or anythin...	Shocked	22	527	Sep 20, 2006 by nycbt
	Newbie (Preview) I am new to Al-anon and this board. After 13 years of living with an alcoholic, I hit MY rock bottom. I was lonely and my life felt so out of control. I used to pray to God..actually BEGGED God to cure my husband and would get angry when my prayers weren't answered. He did finally answer...	RedHead	8	412	Sep 20, 2006 by nycbt
	is detachment REALLY possible with a child? (Preview) I SURE HOPE SO!!!! Last night I attended a new f2f. It was great. There were about 16 people in the meeting. It was a "speaker" meeting and the speaker was a woman with a 40 year old A son. She has been in Alanon for 23 years...since her son was 17 years old. Isn't that amazing??? She proceeded to spe...	Gailey	5	432	Sep 20, 2006 by debilyn
	Christy's Challenge! (Preview) I took Christy's challenge of having a great day. Focus on myself. Be all I can be. I did my long run around the lake in the morn. The geese and ducks are definitely on the move south. I went to my office to catch up and be ready for Monday. I spent 7 hours there. I pushed myself to attack those tasks that I avoid...	nmike	9	435	Sep 19, 2006 by peewee
	rtexas (Preview) LOL...LOL...LOL!!! I cannot believe you found a weeble. It is soooo cute!!!!	Gailey	2	330	Sep 19, 2006 by rtexas
	Remember what a weeble is? (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) I was sharing with my sponsor some of my crazyness from the weekend and I had a memory pop up and suprise me. Weebles... for those of you who don't remember, were little egg shaped people that had weights in the bottom. The kind of toy a little tyke would play with the right wa...	rtexas	9	375	Sep 19, 2006 by hmrnrnmm
	Some good news... (Preview) ((((Hi everyone)))) Hope you all had some serenity over the weekend. Well after getting away to my motel last weekend after finding out the "affair" was real - I finally confronted AH about it and told him I knew it really happened now. I told him I needed some more time to digest, he sa...	hersh	6	315	Sep 19, 2006 by isabela40
	hmmm my 24 plus a few more lol (Preview) I am trying so hard not to get angry. I have to work tonite from 9pm to noon tuesday. The old man was suspicious last nite. If I was in another room , he would come look for me. He said where was the boss lady, She must have a boyfreind is why she is not working weekends. Sheesh she is there Fridays & Sunda...	hmrnrnmm	2	424	Sep 19, 2006 by isabela40
	Need some support (Preview) Hi everyone, My AH is on his way back to the east coast from AZ and begging to stay (I just moved out of our house 3 weeks ago). I have been dreading the actual face to face confrontation which I know is coming. I find it a lot easier to be stong over the phone and in writing but face to face is har...	carolinagirl	4	314	Sep 19, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Selfish Stinking Thinking... (Preview) It seems like forever since I have been to this board. Home puter is on the fritz and work has been busy. I find myself pushing aside work to get this out of my head because it is starting to consume me. My sister and I had plans to attend a concert of my 2 favorite bands tomorrow night....	AlaMom	4	635	Sep 19, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Trying to fill this void (Preview) I am really sad today. Except for a couple of short conversations about bills, I haven't talked to my AH in 5 weeks. I have been doing really well this time, but of course this is only after being kicked out of the house for the zillionth time. I have been reading my alanon literature,...	JulieLynn	6	550	Sep 19, 2006 by Tiger2006
	waking up (Preview) Hello (((family))) I watched a movie today about a woman who awoke from a 20 year coma.Ironically,I could relate.I am very much feeling as if I have been asleep for over 30 years.Has anyone else felt that way? I didn't know I had the right to stand up for myself and go after what I want or what is best fo...	drucilla06	3	326	Sep 19, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Joni21 says hello (Preview) Hi all, I wanted to let you know that Joni21 asked me by way of a letter to say hi and love and misses you all. Peewee	peewee	1	440	Sep 18, 2006 by Maria123
	What a great Family!!! (Preview) I have been coming to this board for almost a year now. sometimes I sign in and sometimes I don't. But, I ALWAYS read your posts. I come when I am down and out and your posts lift me up. It just doesn't get any better than a family like this!!! Thank you all...	irish54	5	305	Sep 18, 2006 by maresie2
	Today the anger has surfaced/ (Preview) Not long ago, after a two-day binge and the process of sobering was completed, A and I had a little talk. Well, perhaps I should say I had a talk. He never has much to say except the occasional, "Maybe I just ought to leave." After I had my talk with myself, he answered, "Well, I have always done everything y...	Diva	19	621	Sep 18, 2006 by isabela40
	mixed emotions (Preview) wednesday night my ex ah called and we talked and i stayed in my program. for the most part. but he was getting drunker as we spoke and i finally just told him that he is not a victim. that he has choices. that this is his life and he is a grown up and can do what he wants. the only true vicitms in this are the child...	serendipity	3	281	Sep 18, 2006 by hersh
	No Academy award today... (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Well after what I considered a big step of leting go on Friday, I tripped a bit on detachment and plan b today. I wanted to go see my brother today in another city, (I think I really wanted to run away LOL ), but I asked my AW if she wanted to go. My brother is in the military and wil...	rtexas	6	437	Sep 18, 2006 by hersh
	Blame it on Karilynn take two! (Preview) (((((((((((((Family)))))))))))))))), Good morning! This time last year I did a post called "Blame it on Karilynn". Well I have decided that this is going to be an annual event. This may sound silly, but hang in there with me. Here's the deal: Ever...	Karilynn	8	418	Sep 18, 2006 by leo
	It's Monday! (Preview) Hi everyone. Thought I would update y'all a little on the situation with my daughter and grandaughter who lost their father/husband this summer. Friday I received an email from my grandaughter who said she missed us very much and that her mom had a new "friend". she said she didn't lik...	irish54	3	370	Sep 18, 2006 by irish54
	Just for today challenge, you up for it? (Preview) ((friends))) I see a lot of hurt and pain on the board lately so I had an idea. Take what you like and leave the rest. I have a challenge for everyone. Just for today... Be the person you want to be, no baggage, strong and solid. See and BE that person. Envision and act joyous and carefree. ...	Christy	15	464	Sep 18, 2006 by gardengal
	The thoughts of an A (Preview) I am completely confused. I don't think I will ever understand how an alcoholic thinks. My A husband and I were divorced this past June (3 months ago). It has actually been a very pleasant experience being rid of him. I no longer face worries about his health, what he will do w...	ditto	6	369	Sep 18, 2006 by Karilynn
	Why do I bother? why am going on? (Preview) Why am I bothering? why am I trying to get Tina a ride home. She has been housesitting in Columbus since Wed. I got off work Wed at 6pm & took her up there around 8 to 9 pm. I then took our neighbor to the grocery store. I got home around 11pm. I had to get up around 4:30am Thursday & Friday to get to every...	hmrnrnmm	3	374	Sep 18, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Thanks everyone, just for being you (Preview) I was having a really crappy day two days ago, right from the early morning till evening. I came here, didn't even vent, just read your posts. Just seeing all the love and support in this room made me feel sooo much better!! Thanks family, Love Ya! TLC	TLC2	4	316	Sep 18, 2006 by Karilynn
	Keeping myself safe (Preview) Hi all, it's so wonderful to come here and to meetings and to hear es&h. It's such a breath of fresh air to know I'm not the fault of the world like sometime the a and my family of origion makes me feel. My a's quiting tobacco products, or rather was, this whole weekend, I don't think i've s...	mastiff	6	376	Sep 18, 2006 by Karilynn
	Cop out (Preview) YOu know, I was thinking he sure is a good excuse, I can't do or I haven't done (fill in the blank) because of him! When hes gone I feel like I can do anything I have no limits. I also have no one to blame or to expect to do things I know they will never do so I just do them myself and thin...	carolinagirl	5	432	Sep 18, 2006 by Karilynn
	Getting away.... (Preview) (((Hi everyone and happy Friday!!!)))) It's been another tough week, but I finally had enough of the drama and went to a motel last night. You know, it was SO peaceful I cannot even believe it. I am tired of talking about the situation, just want to be alone and quiet. I told a great...	hersh	5	470	Sep 18, 2006 by annmarie
	A Share from the Spleen! (Preview) Howdy (((((Everyone)))))) I just felt like posting something this morning about my experience last week. Been a busy week and I am just now sitting down and catching my breath for real! LOL. I was one of the luckies that got to meet a group of people from MIP in San Antonio last weekend. Six of us...	david62	9	419	Sep 17, 2006 by bob6502
	Trouble signing in chatroom (Preview) I need some help. I cannot sign into the alanon chatroom. Says my host name is banned, that I am spam or abuser? Can't figure that one out. Any ideas?????? Email me,I will keep trying. Thanks, Deb	horselover58	2	367	Sep 16, 2006 by peewee
	no light at the end of the tunnel (Preview) It's been a while since i last posted on here , though i regularly read the posts and thought i was learning how to cope with the situation i am in ... how wrong i was Living in Cyprus , i have no means of attending a meeting , the only one i found was 50 ks away from me , held on a mond...	cytagirl	7	512	Sep 16, 2006 by RedHead
	anniversary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Preview) hello everyone, i looked up the date of my first post on the message board and that was oct.1,2005 in the post i was looking for a sponsor and mentioned i was in the program for three weeks at that time. so i guess im happy to say its my one year anniversary since finding alanon!!!!! yay. im so thankful for ev...	notsonew1111	7	344	Sep 16, 2006 by confused
	Another drunkfest Thursday night (Preview) My AH has been laid off from work going on three weeks now. At first he was actually doing some work in the garage and keeping himself busy. I knew it wouldn't last. Now he's been drunk when I return home. It's taking every ounce of energy I have to keep going until I can get divorced and get him out of my life....	Lindy	6	420	Sep 16, 2006 by horselover58
	detachment (Preview) I think I had already been detaching for a long time before leaving. He had been sober for 10mos and when he went on a runner in June and disappeared for 4 days I wasn't even concerned. It usually starts out as a pain in the pit of my stomach and then I start checking - calling, checking the credit cards, look...	carolinagirl	3	353	Sep 16, 2006 by maresie2
	Rage, Forgetting (Preview) I am not much one for posting to boards, going to meetings, or forgetting. But I am at wits end and I am... well I just don't know. So, My wife is an alcoholic. Dry now for almost 4 months and that is great. But that is the difficult part as well. She is involved in local AA meetings and I have been to a few to...	tedley	9	454	Sep 16, 2006 by Cilla
	Time for me to open up (Preview) ok time to tell you my story of what brought me here. I meet my son's father many many years ago. I had fallen for him he was my moon and my stars. But he was an active A. He was abusive both verbal and physical. So when I couldn't take it anymore. He was cheating on me, and the straw was wh...	DoN4me	4	329	Sep 16, 2006 by Andrea12
	" There's one flaw in women,".................. (Preview) " There's one flaw in women,".................. By the time the Lord made woman, he was into His sixth day of working overtime. An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so much time on this one?" And the Lord answered, "Have you seen My spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but no...	daisy2	4	556	Sep 15, 2006 by carolinagirl
	being reliable/being guilty (Preview) I used to really want to be the center of the A's life to be there for him. As some of you know the A has a mother who while she is an enabler never is "there" for him. When he was really illl(with a muscle condition) she gave him a chocolate bar and told him that it would all be ok. She left me to deal with it...	maresie	4	302	Sep 15, 2006 by drucilla06
	Need advice (Preview) I need some advice about my brother. Let me give a little backstory. My brother is addicted to crack/cocaine and he came to me and my parents in March of this year and told his that he wanted help. My parents sent him to a drug rehab program for a month and then when he was released he mov...	troubleandcheetah	7	422	Sep 15, 2006 by TLC2
	First BIG Let go and Let God (Preview) (((((Everyone))))) Well... our story begins with 3 straight weeks of raging over the realization that our main character is NOT going to stop going to Al-Anon while living with an active A. The A is completely distraught and for the 8th time this year has declared the decission to move out on her o...	rtexas	7	446	Sep 15, 2006 by TLC2
	Emotions (Preview) I have noticed since I have started the program. I have been full of all kinds of emotions. I express myself alot more. I say what I mean blunt and to the point. I never used to talk this way. I would always find a nice way to put things to afraid of offending someone somewhere. I just always looked at it as bee...	DoN4me	3	375	Sep 15, 2006 by DoN4me
	SAD AGAIN (Preview) A is out of the house again and I feel relieved but at the same time feel sad...can anyone relate to that? The sadness feels like tears that start in my stomach travels up to my throat and comes out my eyes. He left Monday and I have only heard from him once and he called to say he has a new lease on life...	LadyLibra	9	433	Sep 15, 2006 by Elizabeth M
	trusting my decision... (Preview) Hello I'm having a rough night here. I served my A/Cocaine-addicted hubby with divorce papers last week. This week he's been begging for another chance. I just had a conversation with him tonight and said I just can't go through anymore pain and disrespect, and I'm not sure I can ever trust him again. H...	artygirl	7	438	Sep 15, 2006 by maresie
	the martyr stuff (Preview) I have really been trying to work on the martyr issue which is ingrained for me in dealing with the A and others. I feel I was really trained and schooled to be a martyr by my family of origin. I would alternate with the A between being a martyr (I could no give him enough) to railing and raging a...	maresie	3	346	Sep 15, 2006 by maresie
	Is the price to high ??? (Preview) I have to ask myself this.. Is loving an alcoholic worth what you loose ? My husband the alcoholic in my life can be so mean at times.. He calls me names and makes me feel like dirt. Other days he is as nice as he can be. We started counseling as our marriage has fallin apart and we are hanging on by a thread. I...	Tammy	5	508	Sep 15, 2006 by maresie
	what do i do? (Preview) AH has truck in both our names somewhere in AZ. He is going to treatment. No payments have or will be made. Also he got a DUI in Alabama on the way I found out. What do I need to do to CMA? Not sure what my responsiblity is here but I know I'm not paying for a vehicle I don't have.	carolinagirl	4	372	Sep 15, 2006 by Tiger2006
	obsessive compulsive disorder anyone? (Preview) were you officially diagnosed? and what did they do for you?	Barbara	2	419	Sep 15, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Conventions give a much wider choice of topics than weekly meetings (Preview) When attending a weekly meeting we're stuck in either a step or begineer meeting. Sometimes a discussion. But at conventions there is usually a choice of 3 meetings to attend at the same time.	Barbara	2	295	Sep 15, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Brother gone off the rails again (Preview) Dear All, My ex-A was just rubbing it in a few weeks ago how he had seen my alcoholic brother in Ennis and he was looking great , in a suit, and everything. This was meant to minimise to me just how bad this guys problems are. Yet last week my son told me that my brother had cut loose and gone to another brothe...	maire rua	2	308	Sep 15, 2006 by maresie
	Quick thought for today- boost your self esteem (Preview) I got the following quip in the mail today. It really fits in with what I have been struggling with lately... self-esteem. *We are better than we know. If we can be made to see it, perhaps for the rest of our lives, we will be unwilling to settle for less. -- Anonymous We are wonderful...*	sandie123	1	300	Sep 15, 2006 by smpoli
	tidy house (Preview) Hi everyone, When I was growing up my mother cleaned up after and enabled my Afather so much that even as a child I couldn't understand it. She was and still is completely codependant in his shadow for a lifetime. I remember at a young age vowing to myself that I would never end up like that. Yet here...	annmarie	7	404	Sep 15, 2006 by maresie
	All Hell Has Broken Loose (Preview) Hi all, Well since A went back to drinking earlier this week all hell has broken loose. He had been sober for 7 weeks but had just shut himself in the house and avoided all outside contact in order to do it. Now all his looser friends are back. He has been in the woods cutting firewood...	lebe27	6	522	Sep 15, 2006 by lin0606
	Trying to switch my priorities (Preview) I have been in a very low mood for the past several weeks...well actually it seems for my whole life. I have never thought of myself as being depressed. I had always thought that I felt the way I do because of circumstances in my life. I am now starting to think differently. As a child I remember my mom b...	Gailey	3	460	Sep 15, 2006 by TLC2
	Blessed (Preview) (((friends))) My husband e-mailed me this song this morning and I sat here and cried through it. Believe it or not, it's uplifting..lol Thought I'd share some happy stuff, we all need that!! :) *sigh, 15 more days till he comes home for visit but his daughter is getting married so we have to travel. I don...	Christy	5	343	Sep 15, 2006 by sld488
	Why am I mad and lonely? (Preview) Well he has been missing for about a week and I haven't really thought about it much just every now and again wondering if he's ok and then today I listen to a message from his mother saying that a guy from AA in Arizona called her to say he's ok and getting into rehab on Saturday. Now I found that I was E...	carolinagirl	7	453	Sep 14, 2006 by maresie2
	codependency codyness epidemic (Preview) Oh boy oh boy I am on overload with the subject of "codyness". A family member other than myself raised cody, acoa, seems is trying to pass on codependence to everyone else too. Is that possible? Is this a family disease right along with alcoholism? Not to imply that I myself...	peewee	4	466	Sep 14, 2006 by maresie2
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.