Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Well I have had the visiting form on my counter at home for two weeks and finally filled it out yesterday with a half nice, half not so nice letter to the A. I wonder if I am shooting myself in the foot by not just walking away now. I haven't gotten any mail from him since the letter with the visit form and I am...

babysteps · babysteps

My AH loves to tell me that I treat him disrespectfully. Usually he mutters it under his breath. On the rare occassion that he comes right out and says it, I usually end up apologizing rather than engaging in something I believe will end up being non-productive. Here's what I would really like to say: Re...

sash · sash

In about 10 days, my husband will be sober 90 days. In the beginning it was great. He seemed to really realize what a shi* he had been. I actually could have a conversation with him and no longer had to wonder how long it would take for him to pass out every night. For the past month he has been extremely mo...

Rita G · Rita G

Just have a few minutes before I leave my office for a busy weekend, but I wanted to share bits this wonderful discussion I had with a fellow Al-Anon from my f2f group. . . She was struggling with and beating herself up because she had feelings for someone who has an addiction. My HP lead me to say the...

maresie2 · maresie2

The good news is that I have access to my dogs. The bad news is that I have not been sent or given the rescue groups that were promised to me. I was supposed to get emails about them but they never materialised. That makes me very very leery of asking anyone for anything at all. The bad news is that not one...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))) I read a post about Intamacy, and wow, It has given me some food for thought. For the last few years, I have not gone near sex..Because I never trusted anyone enough to let them close to me. Last year I started having sex, as you all know. And It was like learning...

Kim65 · Kim65

This morning, AH handed me a cup of coffee while I went to the bathroom, barely awake . . . and a little later, I heard him on the phone talking about goats . . . he'd called on an ad for two Nubian milking goats, pretty much the answer to my "greatest farm prayers". He told me, "You stay here...

PapaBear · PapaBear

I have a relative who is currently in a Center, for Drug Abuse, and has just finished Detox and into the 12 steps. When they call, they tell me a lot of things -- like it is only the beginning of the battle, they realize they have to learn about themselves, etc. I don't know how to respond. I don't know if t...

Patches · Patches

I am finally learing something...to take care of me through setting realistic boundaries :) and I am so happy! Last weekend I went to my parents house to celebrate my A-dad's b-day and father's day (a week early). My dad has gone to rehab and has relapsed 1 1/2 years latter. At first I was angry and hurt b...

java · java

I was journaling in the middle of the night the other night when I couldn't sleep. I came up with this poem: If I just had me how nice it would be Not to fret and worry over another. If I just had me, I might hug a tree. The tree would grow and provide me shade to sit and contemplate... If I just had me how boring...

Unsure · Unsure

I am losing my mind. As you all know, I married a wonderful man. He has his problems like we all do, but one of them I just can not tolerate any longer in my home. That is the damage that his exwife casues with their 13 year old son. I am at the point of seeking a divorce to get away from it, and thats not like m...

pabell · pabell

Most times, as some of you have read, I'm a flood of emotions. My A husband stated quite frankly last night that I need to get to a place where I'm happy again. I just about choked on my own air. I stood there with my mouth opened in absolute amazement. I was truely shocked, but he took it as scarca...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I had a rotten day at work yesterday. I'd really appreciate some E/S/H on this. I've talked with my sponsor and I feel alot better, but given how this weekend I'll be working Fri/Sat/Su, I'd like to gain some prospective from the experience. I got called into the managers office yesterday. He had got...

BethC · BethC

Growing up with an AH father I think somewhere along the way I shut down. At 18 I got in a relationship with a BF that was physically and emotionally abusive I stayed in it for three years. I think I stayed because "I knew what to expect" and "what was expected of me" it was easy and I un...

Islandlady · Islandlady

New here, Any advice on what to do when you are out in public and the AH decides to drink way too much and act like a fool? People sure do notice! Waitress avoids you, aquaintences roll their eyes, family either doesn't accompany us out anymore or gets angry and embarrassed by the AH behavior. I get upset...

serendipity · serendipity

What does FINE stand for? Starts with a naughty word but I always think it is so clever when someone asks and I say I'm fine and I remember that FINE actually stands for.......I can't remember....anyone know?

java · java

I am feeling very anxious today and defeated. I'm on my fourth marriage and he announced Saturday that he was "done". I am addicted to bad relationships obviously. I've been working a program for 15 years and I feel like I still can't get it right. This guy was no good for me, a dry drunk A. Been...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Why is American society so anti-drug when it comes to pain pills, heroin, pot, coke, etc...but so pro drug when it comes to tobacco, caffeine, alcohol, viagra, prozac...???? Is this some leftover from our puritain forefathers? Seems odd to me that of equally harmful drugs that some would be legal...

Christy · Christy

I just wanted to check how your hubby's tests turned out and how you are holding up? Take care, Christy

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Even when courage is misplaced, it is never a mistake. From Reader's Digest: WORKING as a secretary at an international airport, my sister had an office adjacent to the room where security temporarily holds suspects. One day security officers were questioning a man when they were suddenly cal...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

Hi everyone. It's been a while since I posted. To be honest, I have really been kinda of embarrassed that I have let myself get in this situation again. I left my active alcoholic husband back in February. I had moved in with my sister, but did not realize that my sister was having her own problems wit...

Gurl25 · Gurl25

Hi, my sister is currently in rehab for alcohol drug addiction - it seems that things are going well - she's the main reason I checked out Al-Anon - although, considering my husband's issues - I should've done this long ago. My sister took steps to get help and I am so proud of her!! My husband has not, we...

bev · bev

family needs prayers,on tuesday june 5,my cousin and his wife lost thier 2 week old son{doctors think it was sids}he was born may,17 he was such a handsome baby boy...makes you think of everything,if i ever lost one of my kids or grandchildren i would be a mess...we just need prayers in this time of heal...

pabell · pabell

I just want to scream. I want to shake the crap out of him. I've pretended for so long that things were ok. Heck, I even convinced myself that things were ok. He's been sober for 5 months, and I have no more of a connection with him now then when he was drinking. People told me to wait a year, that it takes...

zoe · zoe

My brother has been to jail for too many DUI's. He has pretty much burnt everyone in his life. He divorced his wife of twelve years has two children about 5 years ago; one child is severely mentally and physically challenged and the other is a 13 year old girl. He does not have a license, but continues...

afmom03 · afmom03

    &...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Because prayer was an elusive concept when I first started... Trying to pray is praying. --Anonymous "Oh, God, help me! If you get me out of this mess, I'll never screw up again." This was our favorite prayer before we entered the Program. We were always bargaining with God. We have learned...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I've seen some things recently about the everyday conflicts that result from us making changes in ourselves--when we practice assertiveness and don't allow ourselves to be manipulated or practice people pleasing; when we recognize destructive patterns in ourselves that were harmful and hurt...

John · John

Hello Family, This is actually Rose. I am need to know who is going to try to make it to North Carolina for the wedding. I know a few of you are and I am so grateful!!! I do have access to some hotel rooms but they are going fast. Please let me know asap Thanks and love you all Rose ImFree2004

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

Even though she passed away in Aug 2007, it feels like yesturday. All of my other girlfriends live kinda far away and are busy. It's days like today where I am bored and just want to be happy and laugh and she's not there. If you are female you know what it's like to hang out with your buddy and just be happy be...

java · java

I've been in al-anon for several years, been through several A marriages, but never one to quit (me or the A, lol). now I am married to someone who drank A, but says he isn't...although he says he knows the spider veins in his face are from the drinking, and the memory loss. He is clean and sober for a year no...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I have committed myself to 1-2 f2f meetings a week, this board, and daily al-anon readings. I have a wonderful sponsor, but have not yet "worked" the steps. I also go to individual counseling. I understand I need to put the focus on myself, and I am trying, and every so often I discover that I...

afglin · afglin

I have not posted in a while, but want to ask for prayers for my husband. In May he drank on a monday and again on a Tuesday. Tuesday afternoon we went out to eat and I could tell he'd been drinking, but he seemed fine. Then we were walking into the bank and he collapsed. He said his knees gave way. I got him to a c...

lmt123 · lmt123

Hi all ~ I wanted to share what's been going on lately with my daughter, who is 19 and has finished her freshman year at college (commuting to college, almost an hour away). She has, for the last couple of years (actually longer, but it's been more frequent here the last several months) just been a BEAR t...

maresie2 · maresie2

I remember first coming to this board nearly 3 years ago and reading of people leaving their A's and I remember feeling that would never be me. I felt so sure I could find a way to make it work. Now all that seems impossible. I see more and more how impossible the A's attitude, lies, acting out, lack of limit...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I am ready to start working the steps. I have a wonderful person to be my sponsor, however she hasn't been active in AL-Anon for about 15 yrs, so she is not really sure how we go about it. Is there a specific way or a written guide? Any guidance would be greatly appreciated. Thanks, Lou

muppet · muppet

My partner is an alcoholic who attends his meetings. Al Anon has adviced me to part from him. Two months ago he came home and beat me up. I have 2 broken ribs. He has since moved out and we see each other. He said that he only now wants a friendship as he needs to recover and is confused. We meet regularly and he...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family))))), Just wanted to wish you all a wonderful, happy weekend. I was given off this weekend (Fri-Sun) and we decided to make it an official Pipers Kitty weekend! Okay, I can see all the new faces saying "What the heck is this crazy woman talking about?" Several years ago I did a...

belle1 · belle1

trial

tea2 · tea2

My favorite page (if I had to pick only one) is 109 (April 18) in the Courage To Change daily reader. It reminds me where to place the focus, it tells that no one can be responsible for my happiness but myself. If I am unhappy what can I do about it, how can I be a more content person with others when I am disappo...

janey225 · janey225

Hello All Well my AH has been back home for about 10 days. Things are going good so far. Today will be his 2 week mark of Sobriety. He has had stretches of anywhere of 3 days to 10 days with out a drink so this is a milestone. I thought once he gets sober it will all be ok again. He is a completly different person...

marmare · marmare

You guys are the best.....when I find myself upset I immediatly think of all of you and know things will be okay because of the love and support I have here. I went and had my mamogram yesterday and now am totally freaking myself out. The imaging clinic called, they found something in one of my breasts...

pabell · pabell

I'm venting my frustations, anxieties, fears, and concerns. I would love any feedback anyone has, both good and bad.... My son is 16, he will be 17 very soon. As I have posted previously, up until this year, at least to my knowledge, he's been a good kid. Good grades, great in sports, active in sc...

lmw · lmw

know, we dont offer advice.. but what do you think you would do or have you done in a similar situation? Last fall, I took the kids and left my AH the day he came home from rehab. I filed for divorce the same day. He relapsed repeatedly, going back into rehab again, until he totaled his car and was arreste...

DJ · DJ

In August of 2005, I went to one al-anon meeting. I didn't get it... I didn't return. My husband had gone into a rehab program for one week... he relapsed. He went into a second rehab program in April of 06... he reached his one year of sobriety this past April. Lately, I've been angrier than ever. I'm no...

ditto · ditto

For the past 7 years I have known that I no longer want to live here. I have been researching moving across the country to Austin, TX. I will not know anyone there. I will not have a job there. I am terrified. But, where I live now has not been good to me or for me. So, it is time to take the plunge. Today I m...

rtexas · rtexas

((((((Everyone)))))) Finally got my internet connection fixed. Whew, what a mess. So my son is off for the summer and was up at work with me today. He and a friend had planned on meeting up and playing basketball at a local rec center they have memberships to. I heard my son tell his friend that he "...

annmarie · annmarie

When I was with my Abf we had some nasty arguments. Towards the end we seemed to fight all the time. We were as bad as each other. Except I even lashed out a couple of times. I am so, so guilty about this. As we are now distanced I am realising how sick he is, and how sick I was myself. I am getting slowly better no...

cwds35473 · cwds35473

I am new to all of this. Just wondering around on the net and found this site. I am wondering if my husband is an alcoholic - of course, he says he isn't. He drinks at least a 12 pack 5 to 6 nights a week. He drinks by himself. I ask for the weekends to be "family" oriented and he usually complie...

souljoy · souljoy

For me, the hardest part of having an AH is when he goes on binges and starts a conversation and sucks me into his craziness. For a while know I have been successfully detached. last night he got the best of me and now I am an exhausted bundle of nerves today. I keep telling myself to focus on taking car of m...

annmarie · annmarie

I am interested in learning more about alcoholism and sugar addiction. I consider myself to be addicted to sugar, and worry that if I were to drink I could easily develop an addiction to alcohol, given that its likely to be in the genes and environment. I seem to turn to sugar easily to comfort myself, a...

QOD · QOD

Well, I made it to my Martial Arts belt testing Saturday. My daughter and I are now official Green Belts. My son is already a Red Belt. AND on top of that, we were awarded the "Family of the Month" award. So as exhausting as the entire day was, it was very uplifting. :) Sincerely, QOD

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

My AH was strangely missing from the house. His car was here, and everything was right where he left it. I tried to just go about my business, but I couldn't keep my mind from wandering. Finally I saw him get a beer from the trunk of the car and walk down the sidewalk. Curiosity got the better of me and I found...

tryingtoheal · tryingtoheal

I'm divorcing AH, also found out he was cheating and lying - alot. We have a 19 year old son away at college and a 15 year old son at home. AH is living in an apt in town. People are starting to find out about the divorce. They think he is the worlds nicest guy and are asking why. I've told only a very few close fri...

debilyn · debilyn

see my AH. I just want to look at him while he is still alive. Maybe hear his voice. See if he is there at all. what makes me feel this, what do i want? can't help it. I loved my husband very much. sometimes the horribleness of it hits me and i cannot believe where we are now. My Al Anon knowledge scared him. He co...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Just a thought, seems kind of ironic that America was formed but a bunch of 30 and 40 (my age) year olds who were tired of people telling them what to do...and look what we have become...Somtimes I think we have become so civilized we're starting to regress..

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

The other day I posted a link as a reply on a thread and it talked about the ineffectiveness of AA but the thing I found most interesting in the article was the statement that about 5% of alcoholics have spontaneous remission every year. So basically they just quit with no help and are "better&quo...

Denoraphy · Denoraphy

Last night my daughter made her confirmation. She chose her stepsister who is 23 to be her sponsor. We were to meet at the church at 7pm, a half hour before the ceremony was to start. My daughter got more nervous and upset as the minutes ticked by without her stepsister showing up. I felt horribly f...

serendipity · serendipity

That is Ok. I get it. But I feel powerless over me. And learning that HP can take over with me also. I can turn me over to HP, not just everyone else. LOving myself when my ex doesn't love me is really hard. I had crawled out of my funk for a few hours, almost strung together a day but then the feeling came back o...

kissers · kissers

This was a topic in a meeting this evening. I used to cower and hide when someone was angry with me. I always thought it was my fault. Thank God for Al-Anon. I no longer take on someone's anger. I am able to take a step back and look at the situation clearly without emotions going rampant. I look at my side of t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Decided to visit the A in jail. (Preview) Well I have had the visiting form on my counter at home for two weeks and finally filled it out yesterday with a half nice, half not so nice letter to the A. I wonder if I am shooting myself in the foot by not just walking away now. I haven't gotten any mail from him since the letter with the visit form and I am...	carolinagirl	1	377	Jun 12, 2007 by Lunamoth
	Respect and Disrespect (Preview) My AH loves to tell me that I treat him disrespectfully. Usually he mutters it under his breath. On the rare occassion that he comes right out and says it, I usually end up apologizing rather than engaging in something I believe will end up being non-productive. Here's what I would really like to say: Re...	babysteps	4	906	Jun 12, 2007 by Lunamoth
	Does it get better? (Preview) In about 10 days, my husband will be sober 90 days. In the beginning it was great. He seemed to really realize what a shi* he had been. I actually could have a conversation with him and no longer had to wonder how long it would take for him to pass out every night. For the past month he has been extremely mo...	sash	5	499	Jun 12, 2007 by Karilynn
	It's ok to love an A (Preview) Just have a few minutes before I leave my office for a busy weekend, but I wanted to share bits this wonderful discussion I had with a fellow Al-Anon from my f2f group. . . She was struggling with and beating herself up because she had feelings for someone who has an addiction. My HP lead me to say the...	Rita G	7	599	Jun 12, 2007 by Gurl25
	good news and bad news (Preview) The good news is that I have access to my dogs. The bad news is that I have not been sent or given the rescue groups that were promised to me. I was supposed to get emails about them but they never materialised. That makes me very very leery of asking anyone for anything at all. The bad news is that not one...	maresie2	5	448	Jun 12, 2007 by maresie2
	REMEMBERING SEX...LOL (Preview) (((((((((((((((Guys)))))))))))))))) I read a post about Intamacy, and wow, It has given me some food for thought. For the last few years, I have not gone near sex..Because I never trusted anyone enough to let them close to me. Last year I started having sex, as you all know. And It was like learning...	ally	6	733	Jun 12, 2007 by Barbs45
	No idea what to call this (Preview) This morning, AH handed me a cup of coffee while I went to the bathroom, barely awake . . . and a little later, I heard him on the phone talking about goats . . . he'd called on an ad for two Nubian milking goats, pretty much the answer to my "greatest farm prayers". He told me, "You stay here...	Kim65	11	578	Jun 12, 2007 by Gurl25
	How to respond to someone in a Center going thru the Program??? (Preview) I have a relative who is currently in a Center, for Drug Abuse, and has just finished Detox and into the 12 steps. When they call, they tell me a lot of things -- like it is only the beginning of the battle, they realize they have to learn about themselves, etc. I don't know how to respond. I don't know if t...	PapaBear	5	604	Jun 12, 2007 by Gurl25
	Learning...Life is hard, but easier with boundaries (Preview) I am finally learing something...to take care of me through setting realistic boundaries :) and I am so happy! Last weekend I went to my parents house to celebrate my A-dad's b-day and father's day (a week early). My dad has gone to rehab and has relapsed 1 1/2 years latter. At first I was angry and hurt b...	Patches	1	435	Jun 12, 2007 by twinmom2
	if I just had me (Preview) I was journaling in the middle of the night the other night when I couldn't sleep. I came up with this poem: If I just had me how nice it would be Not to fret and worry over another. If I just had me, I might hug a tree. The tree would grow and provide me shade to sit and contemplate... If I just had me how boring...	java	3	439	Jun 12, 2007 by Gurl25
	Losing My Mind (Preview) I am losing my mind. As you all know, I married a wonderful man. He has his problems like we all do, but one of them I just can not tolerate any longer in my home. That is the damage that his exwife casues with their 13 year old son. I am at the point of seeking a divorce to get away from it, and thats not like m...	Unsure	3	415	Jun 12, 2007 by Gurl25
	It's great not to feel alone! (Preview) Most times, as some of you have read, I'm a flood of emotions. My A husband stated quite frankly last night that I need to get to a place where I'm happy again. I just about choked on my own air. I stood there with my mouth opened in absolute amazement. I was truely shocked, but he took it as scarca...	pabell	3	553	Jun 12, 2007 by tryingtoheal
	Rotten day at work (Preview) I had a rotten day at work yesterday. I'd really appreciate some E/S/H on this. I've talked with my sponsor and I feel alot better, but given how this weekend I'll be working Fri/Sat/Su, I'd like to gain some prospective from the experience. I got called into the managers office yesterday. He had got...	Tiger2006	6	536	Jun 12, 2007 by CJ
	Push People Away (Preview) Growing up with an AH father I think somewhere along the way I shut down. At 18 I got in a relationship with a BF that was physically and emotionally abusive I stayed in it for three years. I think I stayed because "I knew what to expect" and "what was expected of me" it was easy and I un...	BethC	6	617	Jun 11, 2007 by Lanchas
	How to handle public displays of alcoholism? (Preview) New here, Any advice on what to do when you are out in public and the AH decides to drink way too much and act like a fool? People sure do notice! Waitress avoids you, aquaintences roll their eyes, family either doesn't accompany us out anymore or gets angry and embarrassed by the AH behavior. I get upset...	Islandlady	9	644	Jun 11, 2007 by Islandlady
	A question (Preview) What does FINE stand for? Starts with a naughty word but I always think it is so clever when someone asks and I say I'm fine and I remember that FINE actually stands for.......I can't remember....anyone know?	serendipity	4	502	Jun 11, 2007 by Diva
	Husband announced he was "done" (Preview) I am feeling very anxious today and defeated. I'm on my fourth marriage and he announced Saturday that he was "done". I am addicted to bad relationships obviously. I've been working a program for 15 years and I feel like I still can't get it right. This guy was no good for me, a dry drunk A. Been...	java	9	1099	Jun 11, 2007 by bill f
	So new question... (Preview) Why is American society so anti-drug when it comes to pain pills, heroin, pot, coke, etc...but so pro drug when it comes to tobacco, caffeine, alcohol, viagra, prozac...???? Is this some leftover from our puritain forefathers? Seems odd to me that of equally harmful drugs that some would be legal...	carolinagirl	6	463	Jun 11, 2007 by bill f
	Afglin? (Preview) I just wanted to check how your hubby's tests turned out and how you are holding up? Take care, Christy	Christy	0	389	Jun 11, 2007 by Christy
	Courage my friend! (Preview) Even when courage is misplaced, it is never a mistake. From Reader's Digest: WORKING as a secretary at an international airport, my sister had an office adjacent to the room where security temporarily holds suspects. One day security officers were questioning a man when they were suddenly cal...	Tiger2006	2	382	Jun 11, 2007 by pabell
	Frustrated (Preview) Hi everyone. It's been a while since I posted. To be honest, I have really been kinda of embarrassed that I have let myself get in this situation again. I left my active alcoholic husband back in February. I had moved in with my sister, but did not realize that my sister was having her own problems wit...	JulieLynn	4	427	Jun 11, 2007 by Becky1
	New here (Preview) Hi, my sister is currently in rehab for alcohol drug addiction - it seems that things are going well - she's the main reason I checked out Al-Anon - although, considering my husband's issues - I should've done this long ago. My sister took steps to get help and I am so proud of her!! My husband has not, we...	Gurl25	7	549	Jun 11, 2007 by Gurl25
	grieving the loss of a loved one (Preview) family needs prayers,on tuesday june 5,my cousin and his wife lost thier 2 week old son{doctors think it was sids}he was born may,17 he was such a handsome baby boy...makes you think of everything,if i ever lost one of my kids or grandchildren i would be a mess...we just need prayers in this time of heal...	bev	9	545	Jun 11, 2007 by Rita G
	Tired of pretending (Preview) I just want to scream. I want to shake the crap out of him. I've pretended for so long that things were ok. Heck, I even convinced myself that things were ok. He's been sober for 5 months, and I have no more of a connection with him now then when he was drinking. People told me to wait a year, that it takes...	pabell	2	531	Jun 11, 2007 by Kim65
	Not sure what to do as a Sister - Need some opinions (Preview) My brother has been to jail for too many DUI's. He has pretty much burnt everyone in his life. He divorced his wife of twelve years has two children about 5 years ago; one child is severely mentally and physically challenged and the other is a 13 year old girl. He does not have a license, but continues...	zoe	5	503	Jun 10, 2007 by CJ
	About DWI (Preview)     &...	afmom03	4	362	Jun 10, 2007 by wille
	Prayer 101 (Preview) Because prayer was an elusive concept when I first started... Trying to pray is praying. --Anonymous "Oh, God, help me! If you get me out of this mess, I'll never screw up again." This was our favorite prayer before we entered the Program. We were always bargaining with God. We have learned...	Tiger2006	1	358	Jun 10, 2007 by kissers
	Conflict vs Crisis (Preview) I've seen some things recently about the everyday conflicts that result from us making changes in ourselves--when we practice assertiveness and don't allow ourselves to be manipulated or practice people pleasing; when we recognize destructive patterns in ourselves that were harmful and hurt...	Tiger2006	1	429	Jun 10, 2007 by confused
	wedding RSVP (Preview) Hello Family, This is actually Rose. I am need to know who is going to try to make it to North Carolina for the wedding. I know a few of you are and I am so grateful!!! I do have access to some hotel rooms but they are going fast. Please let me know asap Thanks and love you all Rose ImFree2004	John	0	585	Jun 9, 2007 by John
	I miss my best friend :( (Preview) Even though she passed away in Aug 2007, it feels like yesturday. All of my other girlfriends live kinda far away and are busy. It's days like today where I am bored and just want to be happy and laugh and she's not there. If you are female you know what it's like to hang out with your buddy and just be happy be...	Friendofyours	5	535	Jun 9, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Dry drunk or sober without AA? (Preview) I've been in al-anon for several years, been through several A marriages, but never one to quit (me or the A, lol). now I am married to someone who drank A, but says he isn't...although he says he knows the spider veins in his face are from the drinking, and the memory loss. He is clean and sober for a year no...	java	11	774	Jun 9, 2007 by btookey
	I confess.... (Preview) I have committed myself to 1-2 f2f meetings a week, this board, and daily al-anon readings. I have a wonderful sponsor, but have not yet "worked" the steps. I also go to individual counseling. I understand I need to put the focus on myself, and I am trying, and every so often I discover that I...	Loupiness	6	534	Jun 9, 2007 by Loupiness
	Prayer request (Preview) I have not posted in a while, but want to ask for prayers for my husband. In May he drank on a monday and again on a Tuesday. Tuesday afternoon we went out to eat and I could tell he'd been drinking, but he seemed fine. Then we were walking into the bank and he collapsed. He said his knees gave way. I got him to a c...	afglin	9	488	Jun 9, 2007 by Kim65
	10-day notice (um...kinda long...) (Preview) Hi all ~ I wanted to share what's been going on lately with my daughter, who is 19 and has finished her freshman year at college (commuting to college, almost an hour away). She has, for the last couple of years (actually longer, but it's been more frequent here the last several months) just been a BEAR t...	lmt123	9	634	Jun 9, 2007 by btookey
	i remember first coming to this board nearly 3 years ago (Preview) I remember first coming to this board nearly 3 years ago and reading of people leaving their A's and I remember feeling that would never be me. I felt so sure I could find a way to make it work. Now all that seems impossible. I see more and more how impossible the A's attitude, lies, acting out, lack of limit...	maresie2	3	550	Jun 9, 2007 by btookey
	Starting Step One (Preview) I am ready to start working the steps. I have a wonderful person to be my sponsor, however she hasn't been active in AL-Anon for about 15 yrs, so she is not really sure how we go about it. Is there a specific way or a written guide? Any guidance would be greatly appreciated. Thanks, Lou	Loupiness	2	543	Jun 9, 2007 by gardengal
	I'm new- advice please (Preview) My partner is an alcoholic who attends his meetings. Al Anon has adviced me to part from him. Two months ago he came home and beat me up. I have 2 broken ribs. He has since moved out and we see each other. He said that he only now wants a friendship as he needs to recover and is confused. We meet regularly and he...	muppet	14	791	Jun 9, 2007 by Lunamoth
	A Pipers Kitty weekend! (Preview) (((((Family))))), Just wanted to wish you all a wonderful, happy weekend. I was given off this weekend (Fri-Sun) and we decided to make it an official Pipers Kitty weekend! Okay, I can see all the new faces saying "What the heck is this crazy woman talking about?" Several years ago I did a...	Karilynn	3	464	Jun 9, 2007 by Maria123
	trying to post..again (Preview) trial	belle1	1	435	Jun 9, 2007 by Maria123
	Question (Preview) My favorite page (if I had to pick only one) is 109 (April 18) in the Courage To Change daily reader. It reminds me where to place the focus, it tells that no one can be responsible for my happiness but myself. If I am unhappy what can I do about it, how can I be a more content person with others when I am disappo...	tea2	4	430	Jun 9, 2007 by gardengal
	When Sobriety Happens (Preview) Hello All Well my AH has been back home for about 10 days. Things are going good so far. Today will be his 2 week mark of Sobriety. He has had stretches of anywhere of 3 days to 10 days with out a drink so this is a milestone. I thought once he gets sober it will all be ok again. He is a completly different person...	janey225	6	739	Jun 9, 2007 by beachgrl
	yet another prayer request.... (Preview) You guys are the best.....when I find myself upset I immediatly think of all of you and know things will be okay because of the love and support I have here. I went and had my mamogram yesterday and now am totally freaking myself out. The imaging clinic called, they found something in one of my breasts...	marmare	11	598	Jun 9, 2007 by bubbles1990
	Teenage son continued.... (Preview) I'm venting my frustations, anxieties, fears, and concerns. I would love any feedback anyone has, both good and bad.... My son is 16, he will be 17 very soon. As I have posted previously, up until this year, at least to my knowledge, he's been a good kid. Good grades, great in sports, active in sc...	pabell	2	444	Jun 9, 2007 by mel123
	Should I drop the divorce proceedings? (Preview) know, we dont offer advice.. but what do you think you would do or have you done in a similar situation? Last fall, I took the kids and left my AH the day he came home from rehab. I filed for divorce the same day. He relapsed repeatedly, going back into rehab again, until he totaled his car and was arreste...	lmw	6	532	Jun 8, 2007 by wp
	Not sure (Preview) In August of 2005, I went to one al-anon meeting. I didn't get it... I didn't return. My husband had gone into a rehab program for one week... he relapsed. He went into a second rehab program in April of 06... he reached his one year of sobriety this past April. Lately, I've been angrier than ever. I'm no...	DJ	7	673	Jun 8, 2007 by Karilynn
	Austin, TX (Preview) For the past 7 years I have known that I no longer want to live here. I have been researching moving across the country to Austin, TX. I will not know anyone there. I will not have a job there. I am terrified. But, where I live now has not been good to me or for me. So, it is time to take the plunge. Today I m...	ditto	10	1450	Jun 8, 2007 by Trouble
	What do we teach our kids (Preview) ((((((Everyone)))))) Finally got my internet connection fixed. Whew, what a mess. So my son is off for the summer and was up at work with me today. He and a friend had planned on meeting up and playing basketball at a local rec center they have memberships to. I heard my son tell his friend that he "...	rtexas	5	711	Jun 8, 2007 by canadianguy
	how do I forgive myself? (Preview) When I was with my Abf we had some nasty arguments. Towards the end we seemed to fight all the time. We were as bad as each other. Except I even lashed out a couple of times. I am so, so guilty about this. As we are now distanced I am realising how sick he is, and how sick I was myself. I am getting slowly better no...	annmarie	4	614	Jun 8, 2007 by canadianguy
	New to all of this (Preview) I am new to all of this. Just wondering around on the net and found this site. I am wondering if my husband is an alcoholic - of course, he says he isn't. He drinks at least a 12 pack 5 to 6 nights a week. He drinks by himself. I ask for the weekends to be "family" oriented and he usually complie...	cwds35473	4	498	Jun 8, 2007 by Christy
	Doing the right thing (Preview) For me, the hardest part of having an AH is when he goes on binges and starts a conversation and sucks me into his craziness. For a while know I have been successfully detached. last night he got the best of me and now I am an exhausted bundle of nerves today. I keep telling myself to focus on taking car of m...	souljoy	3	641	Jun 8, 2007 by Islandlady
	sugar addiction (Preview) I am interested in learning more about alcoholism and sugar addiction. I consider myself to be addicted to sugar, and worry that if I were to drink I could easily develop an addiction to alcohol, given that its likely to be in the genes and environment. I seem to turn to sugar easily to comfort myself, a...	annmarie	2	468	Jun 8, 2007 by annmarie
	I'm a Green Belt now! (Preview) Well, I made it to my Martial Arts belt testing Saturday. My daughter and I are now official Green Belts. My son is already a Red Belt. AND on top of that, we were awarded the "Family of the Month" award. So as exhausting as the entire day was, it was very uplifting. :) Sincerely, QOD	QOD	11	538	Jun 8, 2007 by Lanchas
	Recovery, Anyone? (Preview) My AH was strangely missing from the house. His car was here, and everything was right where he left it. I tried to just go about my business, but I couldn't keep my mind from wandering. Finally I saw him get a beer from the trunk of the car and walk down the sidewalk. Curiosity got the better of me and I found...	RainyJamie	4	497	Jun 8, 2007 by gknee
	need your wise thoughts and reminders (Preview) I'm divorcing AH, also found out he was cheating and lying - alot. We have a 19 year old son away at college and a 15 year old son at home. AH is living in an apt in town. People are starting to find out about the divorce. They think he is the worlds nicest guy and are asking why. I've told only a very few close fri...	tryingtoheal	8	573	Jun 7, 2007 by RainyJamie
	overwhelming desire to..... (Preview) see my AH. I just want to look at him while he is still alive. Maybe hear his voice. See if he is there at all. what makes me feel this, what do i want? can't help it. I loved my husband very much. sometimes the horribleness of it hits me and i cannot believe where we are now. My Al Anon knowledge scared him. He co...	debilyn	3	366	Jun 7, 2007 by Becky1
	In continuation of the legalization issue.... (Preview) Just a thought, seems kind of ironic that America was formed but a bunch of 30 and 40 (my age) year olds who were tired of people telling them what to do...and look what we have become...Somtimes I think we have become so civilized we're starting to regress..	carolinagirl	2	402	Jun 7, 2007 by Kim65
	Spontaneous Remission? (Preview) The other day I posted a link as a reply on a thread and it talked about the ineffectiveness of AA but the thing I found most interesting in the article was the statement that about 5% of alcoholics have spontaneous remission every year. So basically they just quit with no help and are "better&quo...	carolinagirl	5	479	Jun 7, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Question about control (Preview) Last night my daughter made her confirmation. She chose her stepsister who is 23 to be her sponsor. We were to meet at the church at 7pm, a half hour before the ceremony was to start. My daughter got more nervous and upset as the minutes ticked by without her stepsister showing up. I felt horribly f...	Denoraphy	7	592	Jun 7, 2007 by emma
	I am powerless (Preview) That is Ok. I get it. But I feel powerless over me. And learning that HP can take over with me also. I can turn me over to HP, not just everyone else. LOving myself when my ex doesn't love me is really hard. I had crawled out of my funk for a few hours, almost strung together a day but then the feeling came back o...	serendipity	2	367	Jun 7, 2007 by CAM0914
	What do I do when someone is angry with me? (Preview) This was a topic in a meeting this evening. I used to cower and hide when someone was angry with me. I always thought it was my fault. Thank God for Al-Anon. I no longer take on someone's anger. I am able to take a step back and look at the situation clearly without emotions going rampant. I look at my side of t...	kissers	6	639	Jun 7, 2007 by gimmpy
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.