Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

serendipity · serendipity

I have to go face him tomarrow in court. He gets to tell his side of the story. He has everyone fooled. Just like always. All I want is for him to leave me alone. I will need to leave this village. I have no peace anymore. I have fleeting moments of hope. But they are few and far between. I have called the domes...

frazzled · frazzled

this is a reply to one of my post from last week or somethng, but i didnt know whether anyone actually would see it since its from last week. anyway thanks you guys.. i appreciate the support and feedback ;) i have slacked off or took it easy for a couple days on looking back into my childhood and enjoyed a fe...

lilms · lilms

((((((((MIP Family))))))) It is not often I say anything or pot stir but today I am going to do so. Very recently I have had the displeasure of reading posts that in my opinion contain downright bigotry. How disgusting!!! For the majority I can say that my stay on this board has been a safe experience. ...

Diva · Diva

Personal attacks are not a part of my lifestyle. I will not lower myself to sling mud at anyone. To all of you who I have loved, I wish you joy and peace. Thank you for two years of making my life more pleasant. Take good care, Diva

lilms · lilms

Hi Folks, I am off for seven fun conference filled days in October. I am going to Milwaukee. Not wanting to spend all of my very little free time in a booze laden conference atmosphere I am looking for suggestions for the two evenings I will have that are not conference related. The only thing I know abo...

Diva · Diva

For those of you who are interested, the blowing of the shofar (ram's horn) begins the Jewish New Year at sundown this evening. It is called Rosh Hashanah. The year is 5768. THis is a month-long celebration of joy and prayer. So, Happy Rosh Hashanah to all. Diva

nmike · nmike

My AHsober called after a week. I am 2 1/2 weeks into recovery from my 2 shoulder surgeries. I have been getting rides from family and friends to my PT and doctors appointments 2 hours away. My AHsober showed up for 2 days and then left. When I told him that I was going to have surgery, he said he wished that...

Positivelydee · Positivelydee

Just wondering ~ Lately I feel like all of the "bad" i've done in my life (mostly towards my "x") is coming back to me in subtle ways. I'm beginning to wonder about the idea of karma - what goes around comes around. Is this possible? Do you believe in this? I never used to but now I wond...

ddub · ddub

I've been feeling the shock waves lately of awareness and it is exhausting still. Just taking it all in from a new vantage point, sifting through it as kindly as I can to myself yet I often ask how can a smart, kind and patient soul like me become so stupid. Not really kicking myself down, just more in awe of...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

"Oh Christ Dad, leave me alone!" That was my exact thought when I saw the number on my cell during class. Why am I leaving class to answer another drunken rant? I thought, Why? It wasn't Dad. It was the District Manager for Finish Line Foot Wear Store. The local mall is looking for a new mana...

frazzled · frazzled

went to a f2f meeting tonite. askedsomeone to be my temporary sponsor yeah....i have to call her tomorrow.... i am excited and scared at the same time, i have some pretty bad things i want to admit to and i dont know if it will be tomorrow that i will tell her but at least its a step. on the way home i told my hus...

maresie2 · maresie2

The A did not get taken into custody yesterday. He's elected for a jury trial, signed up a public defender. I guess they are trying him as a felony. Who knows. I have given up asking and worrying about it. He showed up at my house last night after I had told him not to. I ignored his more than 15 messages. I gav...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I'm getting caught up with reading posts as I have been away from the boards for a few days. The posts on positive thoughts really caught my attention as they confirmed a thought that was nagging at me during the night. Just what I needed to read! My AH and I went to a marriage program over the weekend and i...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((MIP Friends))) I have not had much time to post lately. Things at work have picked up since the kids went back to school. The financial stuff is still there but slowly getting worked out. I am also being sued on top of everything else from a car accident that occurred over a year and half ago. It's a...

twinkie · twinkie

I'm getting down to making the right decision for me...trying to base it on what is in my best interest and best for me and my recovery. I've been presented with two job offers. The one out of state I let go. Although the company sounded ideal and I have friends close by, I am just not up for a major move. ...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

My friend Eric passed away a week ago from congestive heart failure,(they just found him) which started in his liver due to drinking heavily earlier in his life. He died at 50. We have been best buds for 16 years. He went home to rest from not feeling well and he didnt call anyone, he didn't pick up his pay...

debilyn · debilyn

Well as ok as you can be with eight puppies chewing on your toes... She sounds great, computer is being a poop. Our girl felt good that we cared. love,debilyn

florrie · florrie

i don't say this to offend anyone and i accept that this allegiance is close to your hearts but if we are following alanon principles and traditions here, then maybe this is not the appropriate forum for posts of this nature. please have a look at traditions 6 and 10, they may clarify why i bring this up. ...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I have had some concerns about my kids since I moved out but it seems that our communication has gotten much better over the past year. I have noticed a lack of respect for eachother and me, ungreatful and just generally bad attitude, lack of compassion for others, etc. I saw this book yesterday that I...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Be grateful for where you are now. "It doesn't take as much faith to believe that everything happens for a reason as it does to embrace the belief that I am who and where I am now, today, for a reason - even if I don't know what that reason is and even if I don't particularly like who or where I am today, &q...

Positivelydee · Positivelydee

I haven't posted here for a while and I've been away for a couple of weeks so I haven't been to my weekly alanon meetings (two/week)... and I'm feeling it. I haven't had my alanon support ~ and I am feeling quite alone. Sure, I could call (or SHOULD call) my sponsor or someone on my list but I don't. It a...

maresie2 · maresie2

This afternoon the A goes to court. He is likely to go to jail. He has failed to appear a number of times and has a lot of charges in front of him. As he has no income he can't offer to pay any fine. Yesterday I spoke to him and he gave me the same old sing song about how I had let him down by this and that. I found so...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Haven't seen you around in a bit, just wondering how you're doing?

John · John

Life has been really rough this past week for me. As you most likely know by now, my dearest sister, Dee, was murdered by her husband of 26 years last Tuesday. I have spent the last week in Roanoke Va, struggling to get her life insurance to cover burial expenses, as her husband is listed as her benefic...

lmt123 · lmt123

I think my HP is testing my patience today! I had an appointment today to take my computer in to the repair place to have them help me with some things regarding the fax program that I have and a few other things that I just couldn't figure out. The computer tech and his wife are new friends of ours, so the...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((Family))))))), In rememberance of those who gave their lives on 9/11 and to those who continue to fight all over the world so that evil doesn't win, as well as to their family and friends: I will light a candle, say a prayer, make sure my flag is flying and practice a random act of kindness or two i...

ddub · ddub

So the MIP board is a very big help for me I am a night owl but my eyes tire before the rest of me tires. (-: After reading posts I am almost crosseyed - lol uh, can you tell I might be 39 ... or 49 again? so I have, I hope, a reasonable request After three to five sentences, could some of you leave a couple line spa...

bobump · bobump

I'm really excited to see the post about lyrics. They have had a very profound impact on me this week. I'm making a trip to see a dear close friend from HS. Not really sure if I should be making this trip. Especially after some roadblocks put in the way. I seriously questioned my will vs thy will, as di...

sisdragonfly1957 · sisdragonfly1957

I haven't posted in a while, I have been sucked back in and though I knew better I still let it happen and now I don't know which way to go. My axbf lives only six streets from me. His eight year old son is holding me more than he is, He has turned into someone I don't know and don't know if I want to be around him. H...

florrie · florrie

just wanting to share, i've been caught in a pattern of comparing and self- criticsim since an old freind visited 2 weeks ago. in my mind i want to see her as the loving one, i've invested in this belief about her, as have other freinds. but when she visited she was talking about freinds as having low or hi...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Hello, I got your phone call. I have taken off Sunday the 21st[of Oct] to spend with you and John before you leave. I'm going to ask in the future that rather than saying things such as that you're looking forward to hearing about possible job interviews that you wait for me to discuss my employmen...

tea2 · tea2

Awhile ago a member started a post about lyrics and a few responses said that they felt The Eagles wrote a lot about recovery or as I see the lack thereof. These are a few of their songs (I had to chuckle!) Take It Easy Already GoneTequila SunriseWitchy WomanOutlaw ManPeaceful Easy FeelingWasted TimeI...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Sometimes I sit and wonder, how did I get like this? I feel so much better now but I feel like a whole different person. How did I turn into that other person? In some ways I am still that person with my kids but I remember being 19 and carefree. I remember other people's problems being their problems an...

maresie2 · maresie2

I've found a friend who may want to share animal care and other things with me. We are actively looking for a larger place in the area. We both can have time to look and have specific ideas about the place/size/amenities. I find this so refreshing to be out of the loop of obsessing about the A's latest self...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Interesting responses to my post on the police report, I never said I enjoyed his pain, I said I would enjoy having some truth for once. In any case, the report was vague and so light you couldn't even read the original. It did show that he was driving though which was my primary concern. Now somehow bet...

nycbt · nycbt

Thank you everyone one for all the nice things you said. My grandma wake was on Labor day and the burial was on the Tuesday. With the burial from the church to the burial place the sherffi block entrance ramp and closed highways so no one would interfer that was the cool part. It was nice to be around all my f...

FrannieC · FrannieC

Hi everyone. I am new to this and I figured someone here could help me. I've gone o a few Al-anon meetings but wasn't real crazy about it. But my husband has recently joined AA( 2 months ago) He has relapsed once. He blames me b/c of a fight we had. I am excited that for the first time I have hope for him. This pr...

MISC · MISC

Anyone have a schizoid (not schizophrenic) personality disorder A ? If so, how do you feel it affects the drinking ?

twinkie · twinkie

In my earlier post I wrote about how I am trying to decide if a recent job offer is a good move for me. A second one came in, this one is out of state and back where I used to live. The company is an ideal size for me - 200 people - and the community is much smaller, just what I like! The downside is I would have to...

maresie2 · maresie2

I spoke to the A today one day before he has to go to court. He lives, eats sleeps fantasy. He has a broken pair of glasses and is walking around looking really wierd as the glasses are broken and it amkes him look crazy. He refuses to go cash in on medi-cal which he is eligible for because he is "moving&...

maire rua · maire rua

this morning I said no to various requests three times, this is real breakthough for me, also I am going to ask ex-A to move on now, as I feel I am ready. He's off the booze but dying for his term of treatment to be up so he can go back to the same ol same ol. Its very boring listening to him, but am going to cork for...

twinkie · twinkie

Hi All - into over a year of my recovery and have finally found serenity for me. I am out of the fog I was in called insanity - yeah! Part of my past behaviors was to always be on the go, once I'd hit a point of discontent, I was on to another boyfriend, another job or another state. This year has helped me see...

maresie2 · maresie2

After all the A has put me through with vehicles, speeding tickets, trashing the truck and more he stil has a sense of entitlement. He'a asked me numerous times to fund a rental car for him (he is living in a rural area with no/limited public transit). I jsut tell him my credit is ruined and I have no money....

maresie2 · maresie2

This will be a weekend I will be spending without the a and I am looking forward to quiet time and a time to regroup before I have to move onto to another phase of my life. I am deeply deeply in debt and must repair my credit somehow if I am going to rent again in the next few years. I will have to get another job an...

CJ098 · CJ098

Okay, so I'm reading my books and trying to not be codependent and trying to detach, but it's really hard. The last 3 weeks have been hell. I have a lot a patience but it's wearing thin. Trying to detach when on our days off he goes to the liquor store 3 times a day to get drunk, as I will not have any alcohol...

tea2 · tea2

Hi Fellow Al-Anons , As you may have already read we are gathering Frequently Asked Questions (aka) FAQs for the MIP Al-Anon Group Members and future members who will find their way here. These questions will pertain to both this message board and the chat room. If you have a question or know of a questi...

paul123 · paul123

So, my wife of 12 years tells me that she loves me but is not in love with me anymore. She has been sober for 5 years, goes to AA meetings. Well she says that I am no fun anymore and that I am a grump. It seems that ever since she stopped drinking the fun in our marriage has gone away and my role has changed. I defin...

ddub · ddub

I wanna fight. baby steps get me to a new vantage point and you face more truths that are real and again don't meet my fantasy. Can't go back to denial now after what I've learned so far. And just feel like I am kicking and screaming as I don't want to keep going forward and facing any more honest truths...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Truth does not become more true by virtue of the fact that the entire world agrees with it, nor less so even if the whole world disagrees with it. -Maimonides so, Mom abruptly decided that she was going to come into Dayton this weekend. And of course my flags go up. I'm feeling like, "Lady, does noth...

sgraingermk · sgraingermk

First of all, just wanted to thank you for all the kind responses from my last post. Ok so I've been going over and over it in my head and decided it's time to end this marriage. I really just can't do it anymore. I think I have put up with it for way too long. Things will never change with my AH and I don't want ti...

twinkie · twinkie

oops! Sorry -- Edited by twinkie at 14:52, 2007-09-09

lmt123 · lmt123

I tried to bite my tongue tonite (I didn't really do a good job at it...) My AHsober was watching sports on the tv in the bedroom, while I was watching tv in the living room. He decided to listen to a particular game on the radio in the sunroom, and left the bedroom tv and light on. During a commercial on m...

frazzled · frazzled

continuation of the other day i guess i am just able to sit down and get some more stuff that is on my mind. i talked about my daughter my a and my mom growing up. i didnt mention that even after my mom got us out of that other state and got us all back together in one household i can still remember the night it ha...

MISC · MISC

ANABUSE....I haven't seen any posts on the subject of this drug. I had a written script for it for A son, but never filled it as I didn't feel that I knew enough about it....side effects, etc. Comments, please.

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Today, I will solve the problems of today. I might have become so focused on solving all the problems in my life that I haven't noticed the little problems that arise each day. Do I have anything that needs to be completed or resolved today? I will take a moment each day and work on what I need to do just for t...

Rita G · Rita G

As many of you know, my 6th grandchild will be 1 month old tomorrow. Jace is a beautiful healthy little man - born to our addict daughter. She struggled during this pregnancy and I prayed like all of you do, that she would do better this time. But the disease knows NO boundaries. Her boyfriend came ho...

Jill · Jill

One of the previous posts talked about maintaining our fabulousness. Its a great concept. Let me consider ways I can maintain mine.I think mine involve taking care of myself. I take time to pray and to walk.I brush my teeth every night, regardless of someone waiting for me in bed, and every morning,...

moms3 · moms3

I posted this poem I wrote to my A over a year ago. There are so many new members and I see alot of posts about detaching I wanted to post it again, to share with you all. Prayers and Hugs, Kim Each and every day, it gets easier, to go away.......

serendipity · serendipity

Yesterday, I did go to the ex's work. I did attempt to show his GF (fiancee I just found out, he bought her a beautiful diamond) the text messages he's been sending me for a couple months. He smashed my cell, and got very physically violent and threw me out the door. I went straight to the police station a...

sgraingermk · sgraingermk

Well about less than 2weeks ago i thought i had this detachment thing FINALLY figured out. After 13 years of dealing with AH, i thought "wow i'm finally taking care of myself. and to the extent I still am. But it's so hard. I was started to see a change in him as well. But of course that was too good to be...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	court tomarrow (Preview) I have to go face him tomarrow in court. He gets to tell his side of the story. He has everyone fooled. Just like always. All I want is for him to leave me alone. I will need to leave this village. I have no peace anymore. I have fleeting moments of hope. But they are few and far between. I have called the domes...	serendipity	6	698	Sep 13, 2007 by maresie2
	feeling a little wierd (going to visit my mom) (Preview) this is a reply to one of my post from last week or somethng, but i didnt know whether anyone actually would see it since its from last week. anyway thanks you guys.. i appreciate the support and feedback ;) i have slacked off or took it easy for a couple days on looking back into my childhood and enjoyed a fe...	frazzled	3	486	Sep 13, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Insanity at MIP (closed) (Preview) ((((((((MIP Family))))))) It is not often I say anything or pot stir but today I am going to do so. Very recently I have had the displeasure of reading posts that in my opinion contain downright bigotry. How disgusting!!! For the majority I can say that my stay on this board has been a safe experience. ...	lilms	7	1152	Sep 13, 2007 by Friendofyours
	I will not return to MIP. (closed) (Preview) Personal attacks are not a part of my lifestyle. I will not lower myself to sling mud at anyone. To all of you who I have loved, I wish you joy and peace. Thank you for two years of making my life more pleasant. Take good care, Diva	Diva	10	900	Sep 13, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Milwaukee??????? (Preview) Hi Folks, I am off for seven fun conference filled days in October. I am going to Milwaukee. Not wanting to spend all of my very little free time in a booze laden conference atmosphere I am looking for suggestions for the two evenings I will have that are not conference related. The only thing I know abo...	lilms	1	367	Sep 13, 2007 by Christy
	Rosh Hashanah (closed) (Preview) For those of you who are interested, the blowing of the shofar (ram's horn) begins the Jewish New Year at sundown this evening. It is called Rosh Hashanah. The year is 5768. THis is a month-long celebration of joy and prayer. So, Happy Rosh Hashanah to all. Diva	Diva	23	930	Sep 13, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	And my response was... (Preview) My AHsober called after a week. I am 2 1/2 weeks into recovery from my 2 shoulder surgeries. I have been getting rides from family and friends to my PT and doctors appointments 2 hours away. My AHsober showed up for 2 days and then left. When I told him that I was going to have surgery, he said he wished that...	nmike	5	543	Sep 13, 2007 by Leetle
	Do you believe in Karma? (Preview) Just wondering ~ Lately I feel like all of the "bad" i've done in my life (mostly towards my "x") is coming back to me in subtle ways. I'm beginning to wonder about the idea of karma - what goes around comes around. Is this possible? Do you believe in this? I never used to but now I wond...	Positivelydee	8	710	Sep 13, 2007 by bobump
	awareness can be shocking (Preview) I've been feeling the shock waves lately of awareness and it is exhausting still. Just taking it all in from a new vantage point, sifting through it as kindly as I can to myself yet I often ask how can a smart, kind and patient soul like me become so stupid. Not really kicking myself down, just more in awe of...	ddub	3	605	Sep 13, 2007 by Friendofyours
	I can't explain mericles (Preview) "Oh Christ Dad, *leave me alone!" That was my exact thought when I saw the number on my cell during class. Why am I leaving class to answer another drunken rant?* I thought, Why? It wasn't Dad. It was the District Manager for Finish Line Foot Wear Store. The local mall is looking for a new mana...	Tiger2006	7	568	Sep 13, 2007 by Loupiness
	a few things (Preview) went to a f2f meeting tonite. askedsomeone to be my temporary sponsor yeah....i have to call her tomorrow.... i am excited and scared at the same time, i have some pretty bad things i want to admit to and i dont know if it will be tomorrow that i will tell her but at least its a step. on the way home i told my hus...	frazzled	5	541	Sep 13, 2007 by frazzled
	not giving into the dramarama (Preview) The A did not get taken into custody yesterday. He's elected for a jury trial, signed up a public defender. I guess they are trying him as a felony. Who knows. I have given up asking and worrying about it. He showed up at my house last night after I had told him not to. I ignored his more than 15 messages. I gav...	maresie2	4	709	Sep 13, 2007 by maire rua
	Being positive and the power of ME (Preview) I'm getting caught up with reading posts as I have been away from the boards for a few days. The posts on positive thoughts really caught my attention as they confirmed a thought that was nagging at me during the night. Just what I needed to read! My AH and I went to a marriage program over the weekend and i...	Loupiness	4	653	Sep 12, 2007 by twinkie
	Still here... a quick update (Preview) (((MIP Friends))) I have not had much time to post lately. Things at work have picked up since the kids went back to school. The financial stuff is still there but slowly getting worked out. I am also being sued on top of everything else from a car accident that occurred over a year and half ago. It's a...	twinmom2	4	594	Sep 12, 2007 by nmike
	Doing the right thing? (Preview) I'm getting down to making the right decision for me...trying to base it on what is in my best interest and best for me and my recovery. I've been presented with two job offers. The one out of state I let go. Although the company sounded ideal and I have friends close by, I am just not up for a major move. ...	twinkie	3	456	Sep 12, 2007 by nmike
	I lost another best friend :( (Preview) My friend Eric passed away a week ago from congestive heart failure,(they just found him) which started in his liver due to drinking heavily earlier in his life. He died at 50. We have been best buds for 16 years. He went home to rest from not feeling well and he didnt call anyone, he didn't pick up his pay...	Friendofyours	16	725	Sep 12, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Kim65 is ok (Preview) Well as ok as you can be with eight puppies chewing on your toes... She sounds great, computer is being a poop. Our girl felt good that we cared. love,debilyn	debilyn	5	876	Sep 12, 2007 by maresie2
	politics in al-anon (Preview) i don't say this to offend anyone and i accept that this allegiance is close to your hearts but if we are following alanon principles and traditions here, then maybe this is not the appropriate forum for posts of this nature. please have a look at traditions 6 and 10, they may clarify why i bring this up. ...	florrie	11	1140	Sep 12, 2007 by florrie
	Parenting (Preview) I have had some concerns about my kids since I moved out but it seems that our communication has gotten much better over the past year. I have noticed a lack of respect for eachother and me, ungreatful and just generally bad attitude, lack of compassion for others, etc. I saw this book yesterday that I...	carolinagirl	6	519	Sep 12, 2007 by Jen
	"I am right where I need to be.." (Preview) Be grateful for where you are now. "It doesn't take as much faith to believe that everything happens for a reason as it does to embrace the belief that I am who and where I am now, today, for a reason - even if I don't know what that reason is and even if I don't particularly like who or where I am today, &q...	Tiger2006	2	951	Sep 12, 2007 by bobump
	Trying not to "isolate" (Preview) I haven't posted here for a while and I've been away for a couple of weeks so I haven't been to my weekly alanon meetings (two/week)... and I'm feeling it. I haven't had my alanon support ~ and I am feeling quite alone. Sure, I could call (or SHOULD call) my sponsor or someone on my list but I don't. It a...	Positivelydee	4	751	Sep 12, 2007 by twinkie
	Feeling immensely sad (Preview) This afternoon the A goes to court. He is likely to go to jail. He has failed to appear a number of times and has a lot of charges in front of him. As he has no income he can't offer to pay any fine. Yesterday I spoke to him and he gave me the same old sing song about how I had let him down by this and that. I found so...	maresie2	6	549	Sep 12, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Kim65? (Preview) Haven't seen you around in a bit, just wondering how you're doing?	carolinagirl	3	600	Sep 12, 2007 by Jen
	My Sister Was Murdered on August 28th, by her husband :( (Preview) Life has been really rough this past week for me. As you most likely know by now, my dearest sister, Dee, was murdered by her husband of 26 years last Tuesday. I have spent the last week in Roanoke Va, struggling to get her life insurance to cover burial expenses, as her husband is listed as her benefic...	John	25	1964	Sep 12, 2007 by Moon
	testing, testing, 123... (Preview) I think my HP is testing my patience today! I had an appointment today to take my computer in to the repair place to have them help me with some things regarding the fax program that I have and a few other things that I just couldn't figure out. The computer tech and his wife are new friends of ours, so the...	lmt123	3	467	Sep 11, 2007 by jonibaloni21
	In rememberance of 9/11 (Preview) (((((((Family))))))), In rememberance of those who gave their lives on 9/11 and to those who continue to fight all over the world so that evil doesn't win, as well as to their family and friends: I will light a candle, say a prayer, make sure my flag is flying and practice a random act of kindness or two i...	Karilynn	14	649	Sep 11, 2007 by Positivelydee
	general request (Preview) So the MIP board is a very big help for me I am a night owl but my eyes tire before the rest of me tires. (-: After reading posts I am almost crosseyed - lol uh, can you tell I might be 39 ... or 49 again? so I have, I hope, a reasonable request After three to five sentences, could some of you leave a couple line spa...	ddub	7	403	Sep 11, 2007 by frazzled
	Lyrics....more (Preview) I'm really excited to see the post about lyrics. They have had a very profound impact on me this week. I'm making a trip to see a dear close friend from HS. Not really sure if I should be making this trip. Especially after some roadblocks put in the way. I seriously questioned my will vs thy will, as di...	bobump	2	474	Sep 11, 2007 by david62
	I am soooo confused! (Preview) I haven't posted in a while, I have been sucked back in and though I knew better I still let it happen and now I don't know which way to go. My axbf lives only six streets from me. His eight year old son is holding me more than he is, He has turned into someone I don't know and don't know if I want to be around him. H...	sisdragonfly1957	7	580	Sep 11, 2007 by sisdragonfly1957
	shame spiral (Preview) just wanting to share, i've been caught in a pattern of comparing and self- criticsim since an old freind visited 2 weeks ago. in my mind i want to see her as the loving one, i've invested in this belief about her, as have other freinds. but when she visited she was talking about freinds as having low or hi...	florrie	6	554	Sep 11, 2007 by florrie
	I definately need y'all on this one... (Preview) Hello, I got your phone call. I have taken off Sunday the 21st[of Oct] to spend with you and John before you leave. I'm going to ask in the future that rather than saying things such as that you're looking forward to hearing about possible job interviews that you wait for me to discuss my employmen...	Tiger2006	9	673	Sep 11, 2007 by bobump
	Songs by The Eagles and how I see them today (Preview) Awhile ago a member started a post about lyrics and a few responses said that they felt The Eagles wrote a lot about recovery or as I see the lack thereof. These are a few of their songs (I had to chuckle!) Take It Easy Already GoneTequila SunriseWitchy WomanOutlaw ManPeaceful Easy FeelingWasted TimeI...	tea2	4	3486	Sep 11, 2007 by bobump
	How did I become this? (Preview) Sometimes I sit and wonder, how did I get like this? I feel so much better now but I feel like a whole different person. How did I turn into that other person? In some ways I am still that person with my kids but I remember being 19 and carefree. I remember other people's problems being their problems an...	carolinagirl	11	712	Sep 11, 2007 by Diva
	focus on me no matter what (Preview) I've found a friend who may want to share animal care and other things with me. We are actively looking for a larger place in the area. We both can have time to look and have specific ideas about the place/size/amenities. I find this so refreshing to be out of the loop of obsessing about the A's latest self...	maresie2	2	518	Sep 11, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Got the Police Report (Preview) Interesting responses to my post on the police report, I never said I enjoyed his pain, I said I would enjoy having some truth for once. In any case, the report was vague and so light you couldn't even read the original. It did show that he was driving though which was my primary concern. Now somehow bet...	carolinagirl	5	609	Sep 11, 2007 by maire rua
	grandma funeral (Preview) Thank you everyone one for all the nice things you said. My grandma wake was on Labor day and the burial was on the Tuesday. With the burial from the church to the burial place the sherffi block entrance ramp and closed highways so no one would interfer that was the cool part. It was nice to be around all my f...	nycbt	4	334	Sep 10, 2007 by Karilynn
	My AH has joined AA and is driving me crazy!!! (Preview) Hi everyone. I am new to this and I figured someone here could help me. I've gone o a few Al-anon meetings but wasn't real crazy about it. But my husband has recently joined AA( 2 months ago) He has relapsed once. He blames me b/c of a fight we had. I am excited that for the first time I have hope for him. This pr...	FrannieC	8	1699	Sep 10, 2007 by Karilynn
	SCHIZOID PERSONALITY (Preview) Anyone have a schizoid (not schizophrenic) personality disorder A ? If so, how do you feel it affects the drinking ?	MISC	1	513	Sep 10, 2007 by Friendofyours
	And another decision - oh my (Preview) In my earlier post I wrote about how I am trying to decide if a recent job offer is a good move for me. A second one came in, this one is out of state and back where I used to live. The company is an ideal size for me - 200 people - and the community is much smaller, just what I like! The downside is I would have to...	twinkie	5	594	Sep 10, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Living in fantasy (Preview) I spoke to the A today one day before he has to go to court. He lives, eats sleeps fantasy. He has a broken pair of glasses and is walking around looking really wierd as the glasses are broken and it amkes him look crazy. He refuses to go cash in on medi-cal which he is eligible for because he is "moving&...	maresie2	2	550	Sep 10, 2007 by maresie2
	saying No (Preview) this morning I said no to various requests three times, this is real breakthough for me, also I am going to ask ex-A to move on now, as I feel I am ready. He's off the booze but dying for his term of treatment to be up so he can go back to the same ol same ol. Its very boring listening to him, but am going to cork for...	maire rua	2	328	Sep 10, 2007 by maresie2
	indecision - help! (Preview) Hi All - into over a year of my recovery and have finally found serenity for me. I am out of the fog I was in called insanity - yeah! Part of my past behaviors was to always be on the go, once I'd hit a point of discontent, I was on to another boyfriend, another job or another state. This year has helped me see...	twinkie	4	469	Sep 10, 2007 by carolinagirl
	saying no to the A no matter what (Preview) After all the A has put me through with vehicles, speeding tickets, trashing the truck and more he stil has a sense of entitlement. He'a asked me numerous times to fund a rental car for him (he is living in a rural area with no/limited public transit). I jsut tell him my credit is ruined and I have no money....	maresie2	5	617	Sep 10, 2007 by carolinagirl
	another weekend (Preview) This will be a weekend I will be spending without the a and I am looking forward to quiet time and a time to regroup before I have to move onto to another phase of my life. I am deeply deeply in debt and must repair my credit somehow if I am going to rent again in the next few years. I will have to get another job an...	maresie2	3	393	Sep 10, 2007 by carolinagirl
	trying....but it's really hard (Preview) Okay, so I'm reading my books and trying to not be codependent and trying to detach, but it's really hard. The last 3 weeks have been hell. I have a lot a patience but it's wearing thin. Trying to detach when on our days off he goes to the liquor store 3 times a day to get drunk, as I will not have any alcohol...	CJ098	9	650	Sep 10, 2007 by carolinagirl
	The “Questionnaire” for Frequently Asked Questions (Preview) Hi Fellow Al-Anons , As you may have already read we are gathering Frequently Asked Questions (aka) FAQs for the MIP Al-Anon Group Members and future members who will find their way here. These questions will pertain to both this message board and the chat room. If you have a question or know of a questi...	tea2	9	2093	Sep 10, 2007 by jonibaloni21
	Where do I go from Here????? (Preview) So, my wife of 12 years tells me that she loves me but is not in love with me anymore. She has been sober for 5 years, goes to AA meetings. Well she says that I am no fun anymore and that I am a grump. It seems that ever since she stopped drinking the fun in our marriage has gone away and my role has changed. I defin...	paul123	8	653	Sep 10, 2007 by ddub
	wanna fight facing truth (Preview) I wanna fight. baby steps get me to a new vantage point and you face more truths that are real and again don't meet my fantasy. Can't go back to denial now after what I've learned so far. And just feel like I am kicking and screaming as I don't want to keep going forward and facing any more honest truths...	ddub	7	642	Sep 10, 2007 by ddub
	Thought y'all would like to know about the long term results of boundries (Preview) Truth does not become more true by virtue of the fact that the entire world agrees with it, nor less so even if the whole world disagrees with it. -Maimonides so, Mom abruptly decided that she was going to come into Dayton this weekend. And of course my flags go up. I'm feeling like, "Lady, does noth...	Tiger2006	2	559	Sep 9, 2007 by Jen
	It's Over (Preview) First of all, just wanted to thank you for all the kind responses from my last post. Ok so I've been going over and over it in my head and decided it's time to end this marriage. I really just can't do it anymore. I think I have put up with it for way too long. Things will never change with my AH and I don't want ti...	sgraingermk	4	589	Sep 9, 2007 by Fifi
	Indecision - need guidance... (Preview) oops! Sorry -- Edited by twinkie at 14:52, 2007-09-09	twinkie	0	308	Sep 9, 2007 by twinkie
	Done Yet? (Preview) I tried to bite my tongue tonite (I didn't really do a good job at it...) My AHsober was watching sports on the tv in the bedroom, while I was watching tv in the living room. He decided to listen to a particular game on the radio in the sunroom, and left the bedroom tv and light on. During a commercial on m...	lmt123	2	431	Sep 9, 2007 by Diva
	lonnnnng one again. letting more of the past out step 4?? (Preview) continuation of the other day i guess i am just able to sit down and get some more stuff that is on my mind. i talked about my daughter my a and my mom growing up. i didnt mention that even after my mom got us out of that other state and got us all back together in one household i can still remember the night it ha...	frazzled	2	698	Sep 9, 2007 by getoverit
	ANABUSE (Preview) ANABUSE....I haven't seen any posts on the subject of this drug. I had a written script for it for A son, but never filled it as I didn't feel that I knew enough about it....side effects, etc. Comments, please.	MISC	8	1314	Sep 9, 2007 by Christy
	Just for today.... (Preview) Today, I will solve the problems of today. I might have become so focused on solving all the problems in my life that I haven't noticed the little problems that arise each day. Do I have anything that needs to be completed or resolved today? I will take a moment each day and work on what I need to do just for t...	Tiger2006	2	381	Sep 9, 2007 by maire rua
	The disease seperates Mom & child - breaks a Grandmother's heart (Preview) As many of you know, my 6th grandchild will be 1 month old tomorrow. Jace is a beautiful healthy little man - born to our addict daughter. She struggled during this pregnancy and I prayed like all of you do, that she would do better this time. But the disease knows NO boundaries. Her boyfriend came ho...	Rita G	7	822	Sep 9, 2007 by moms3
	Fabulousness (Preview) One of the previous posts talked about maintaining our fabulousness. Its a great concept. Let me consider ways I can maintain mine.I think mine involve taking care of myself. I take time to pray and to walk.I brush my teeth every night, regardless of someone waiting for me in bed, and every morning,...	Jill	6	564	Sep 8, 2007 by lmt123
	Detachment With Love (Preview) I posted this poem I wrote to my A over a year ago. There are so many new members and I see alot of posts about detaching I wanted to post it again, to share with you all. Prayers and Hugs, Kim *Each and every day,* *it gets easier,* *to go away.......*	moms3	5	565	Sep 8, 2007 by Fifi
	Not too fabulous (Preview) Yesterday, I did go to the ex's work. I did attempt to show his GF (fiancee I just found out, he bought her a beautiful diamond) the text messages he's been sending me for a couple months. He smashed my cell, and got very physically violent and threw me out the door. I went straight to the police station a...	serendipity	7	601	Sep 8, 2007 by frazzled
	Having a hard time. :( (Preview) Well about less than 2weeks ago i thought i had this detachment thing FINALLY figured out. After 13 years of dealing with AH, i thought "wow i'm finally taking care of myself. and to the extent I still am. But it's so hard. I was started to see a change in him as well. But of course that was too good to be...	sgraingermk	5	502	Sep 8, 2007 by Jen
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.