The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
this morning I said no to various requests three times, this is real breakthough for me, also I am going to ask ex-A to move on now, as I feel I am ready. He's off the booze but dying for his term of treatment to be up so he can go back to the same ol same ol. Its very boring listening to him, but am going to cork for three days this week for a course so am delighted.
congrats on saying no! brought back a few memories.... no nicely, no firmly, no with more determination, no with an edge, no with detatchment....etc!! i've sent you a message to yourwhiteboard, i hope thats ok?
Today I suggested the A apply for medical. He needs glasses desperately. He is walking around with a broken pair and it looks terrible. He said no he is off on his fantasy again about moving several states away. I let it go. Time not to be overinvolved anymore.
i think its real hard to keep setting those boundaries. There was enormous secondary gain for me in caretaking.
I am ready to move on too. He claims he is coming over tomorrow to get the dog he has. I am not sure he is going to make it as he is going to court but I let that go too. At least I will know tomorrow.
