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new here, overwhelmed with a crisis
(Preview)
hi, i'm totally new here. i've been trying to attend a local Al-Anon meeting but no one shows up. my boyfriend, well i'm almost 40 so boyfriend sounds silly, anyway he is a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. he did warn me he had intimacy issues before we began our relationship. i have child abuse iss...
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purpleraven
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12
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631
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Boundries
(Preview)
Hello ((((Everyone))))
Well...We had a rough weekend. I am afraid I didn't handle things as well as I should have. It hurts so bad to have someone I love tell me that I don't show her I love her and respect her. When she was screaming it to me in the car at 11:00 at night on the highway I...
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rtexas
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9
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408
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proud of myself for not feeding into my A's rage
(Preview)
I feel like I made some progress last night. I got out of work early, my husband was out shooting golf balls when I called him. We had a miscommunication about dinner, I told him I would shop and cook and to take his time coming home-not to rush just because I was out early. Well, I shopp...
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liliana
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8
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352
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Praying for a Miracle from a bottle
(Preview)
Hiya roomies,
Well I went to the shop the morning to check on the car as asked to by the guys there. I took a young man for a ride in my car so hopefully he could see/hear what I was seeing/hearing. They had taken the car for quite a ride yesterday and heard nothing. The hope was that either I would hear nothi...
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Dolphin123
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6
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361
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Can your A see a change in you
(Preview)
((((Everyone))))
My wife was trying to start something last night, but instead paid me a compliment by accident. She said "...you are different and its weird. I just want my husband back."
Obviously she was implying I was turning into a freak, but it acturally made me feel good that...
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rtexas
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10
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797
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After its over...then what??
(Preview)
I was in a relatonship with an alchoholic for 16 years. I finally ended it for myself and for my children. I did what everyone said I should do. I pulled my self up by the bootstraps and I got my life straight. We have been apart for almost three years. The divorce will be final aug 21 because up until now he re...
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amihappy
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11
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565
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Looking for information
(Preview)
Hi
I'm looking for info that might help my 15 year old son. He is old enough now that he has figured out his grandfather (my dad)is an alcoholic. His drinking has really increased, starts in the am.now, usually slurring by afternoon. My son his so afraid his grandfather is going to die in...
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waykar
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8
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455
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THANK YOU
(Preview)
THANK-YOU ALL FOR YOUR REPLYS AND PRAYERS. YOU GUYS ARE THE GREATEST!!! i'M STILL IN MY BEDROOM WHERE I'VE BEEN MOST OF THE DAY. WHILE I WAS OUT FEEDING MY PETS, HE DID SOMETHING TO THE TV SO HE COULD WATCH IT FROM THE LIVING ROOM. I NOTICED HE ALSO REFILLED THE FRIDGE WITH BEER, SO GUESS HE MUST STILL BE BLAM...
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TLC2
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2
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312
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laughing at myself!
(Preview)
I was thinking how precious laughter is to me. I didn't show up at alanon laughing, and I am very, very grateful for the laughter I have gotten from this program. I always say my best program comes when I laugh at myself. Got me to thinking about that, and I wanted to share this.
When...
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greta
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4
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326
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Alone time...
(Preview)
Hi everyone:
Well, it happened again. A and I had plans to go camping, to get out of town this past weekend. He ended up working (which is actually good - he needs to) but I was pretty let down. All of this year, it seems he has been running away from our relationship, it feels like we d...
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hersh
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6
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301
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Unconditional Love
(Preview)
"Today I can accepet myself for what I am because I know that whatever happens, I have a higher power and a group of people who will love me anyway"
This quote stopped me dead in my meeting tonight. I read it and couldn't speak. I later did get my voice enough to express how unbe...
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sandie123
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6
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730
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Examining my relationship with Alcohol
(Preview)
Hey everyone
I needed to share and vent about my questionable relationship with alcohol and would love to hear more stories of others in the program who feel they could be or determined they were alcholic ....aka ..."double winner"
Until recently, I never ever thought I had an issue. My al...
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beachbaby
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7
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408
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Any one seen Pico?
(Preview)
Has anyone seen Pico?
On the board or in chat ?
Bob
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bobump
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6
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383
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healing going on here.....
(Preview)
hello everyone, havnt been on here in a while but id thought i would update you all. two weeks ago if you recall my a relapsed and that was it for me. and this time it really is. he has begged me back numerous times promising me the world and in the past i always believed. but watch the feet right? i dont see any...
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notsonew1111
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5
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341
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Pulling my hair out
(Preview)
I am so stressed and I just want some peace in my life...even for a day. Doesn't everyone deserve a break once in a while?
I want to be able to go to bed and fall asleep peacefully, not with 1000 things running through my head. I want to wake up in the morning thinking about positive things...not worried a...
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Jayda
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7
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406
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JUST DONT KNOW?
(Preview)
Hi All,well another saturday meeting with my H ,who i haven,t live with for 12 wks,he comes down to see me i suppose and our new grandson,who i look after sat mornings.
We are now talking much more than we ever have in the last 3 yrs,WHY do i feel sorry for him,he wants us to have another go at saving our mar...
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ollie
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12
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480
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me
(Preview)
Everyone I had an awsome weekend. I left my husband for over night and hung out with the girls, we went on the beach got a nice tan, bought some stuff I had lots of fun. I got a couple henna. I have come since a log way, last yr I would of Not be able to do this. I was not ready to leave my husband over night. I was so h...
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nycbt
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6
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277
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money issues & others enabling A
(Preview)
Before I start, what do you do about a neighbor enabling buying the booze & transporting it her when I have the wheels? Can I tell the neighbor no more? I have not yet.
I got off work at 8pm. I came home and loaded the sale items by myself. I acted like everything was great when I came inside.
&...
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hmrnrnmm
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3
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650
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Lull in the storm...
(Preview)
Hi Friends,
Well, I don't know what this is all about. My AHSober and I have been at each other's throats for a year. In the last 3 weeks, we seemed to have hit the eye in the storm. We usually end of fighting about our relationship (mostly on my part) because he wants a divorce. About 3 weeks...
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nmike
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3
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373
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New here, but need lots of help!
(Preview)
Hello. My husband is an alcoholic and I am at wits end. I don't know where to turn and thought I would start here. He only drinks at night, but drinks EVERY night, 7 nights a week. He gets completely drunk. He drinks straight vodka and swtiches back and forth to beer.&nb...
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desperate for help
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9
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527
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WHAT HAPPENS AFTER ASCITES?
(Preview)
Does anyone know the stages after ascites progresses? I need to speak to someone who has been there or "is" at this point. I'm dealing with an "A" that has been diagnosed with "no liver" and will (hopefully) be added to the transplant list in 6 mos. from what the hospital told...
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vangellic
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7
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1823
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Hello, new here...
(Preview)
I'm very...tired.
I think my husband is an A. He says that he isn't...um...even though he admits that he's been drinking to dull his pain for the past...well...years.
When he is not drinking, he is disconnected, grouchy, short-tempered, angry, sullen, forgetful, mean...once he's had a drink...
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pj
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6
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605
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I need Help! I am new!!
(Preview)
My husband has a drinking problem that he won't admit to and it is tearing this family apart!! We have all addressed the issue, however he doesn't seem to get it. He feels as long as it is controlled he is okay! He makes more excuses!!!! I can't take anymore of this. I hav...
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s1234
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5
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392
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update (sorry, long)
(Preview)
I don't know what is going on in my life right now.
I had layed out his meds (in a box) on the floor outside the bedroom door. When he came in, I told him he could sleep in the spare room, I'd be da**ed if he was going to sleep in MY bed.
I tried not to respond to any of his rantings, but he was trying to blame my s...
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TLC2
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3
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397
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where do I belong
(Preview)
Hi,
Has any one ever felt they dont belong any where?I am in alanon but my ex a hasnt been with me over 3 years there is no A in my life.
I tried comeing here and posting and try to give and respond to help others.I have gone to the aa side of posting, even though they been extra kind to me i just...
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dori
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11
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484
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How stupid does he think I am...
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
I'm shocked. Don't know why but I am!
I'm working my program quite well I think, detatching with love, not padding his (my Aboyfriend) fall when he drinks all his wages etc.
Anyway, I made it clear that I would not be around drinking, and if he chose to disappear for three days wit...
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annmarie
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8
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520
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can't stop obsessing
(Preview)
I am brand new to this board (about 5 minutes) and go about once a week to in person Alanon meetings. My former husband is my qualifier, as well as my psychotic mother. I am typical enabeler, trying to heal the world, one addict at a time. I
need help because I want and need to s...
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leigh
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8
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535
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stress free
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
Just wanted to check in and let you know how things are going. Last weekend my husband came home drunk and I ignored him when he walked in. The next morning I made a very strained phone call to him telling him that if he wanted any papers signed in future he needed to have only hi...
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leo
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4
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393
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War is over, Alcohol 1, TLC 0
(Preview)
Well folks, this is it.(please HP, let it really be over!! Give me the strength to stand by ME!!)
I know a lot of you may be wondering why I call it quits after such a trivial (?) thing?? He got drunk on July 9th (my birthday) and ruined that, I called my son and cancelled because I didn't want the kids to see...
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TLC2
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7
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535
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Maturity vs. Immaturity
(Preview)
I wandered into a chat room and was looking at the top of the screen where it says "topic" and was then thinking how people come in and ask "whats the topic?" which led me to thinking, gee wouldn't it be fun to have a "today's topic" every day. So then I opened up my ODAT to July 16 and started reading. R...
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kismetstrand
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1
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319
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I THINK I did it right..
(Preview)
I've been zeroing in on detaching with love. I see now where it is considered difficult by some. Between my almost uncontrollable urge to be in his business and feeling I need to completely ignore him..that narrow bridge became a bit more visible to me...I THINK..
Darling A came home today tanked af...
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RamzDear
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4
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384
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how insedious is MY disease
(Preview)
all of the sudden i am having a hard time keeping the focus on myself. i am starting to wonder what my soon to be ah is doing and with who. up till now, when i would wonder, i could change my thought or say a prayer to let it go. and it worked. i was not obsessing. but the past couple of days i have been behaving mis...
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serendipity
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4
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499
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gratitude
(Preview)
I'm writing to thank all of you who have touched my life via this site.
My f2f mtgs and of course my sponsor deserve (and will get) a lot of my thanks too, but there is something about all of you and this site that really helped me to understand and incorporate the al anon program into my life these last few...
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emma
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3
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364
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Wait a minute....
(Preview)
ok so he is him. Tells me he is still in love with me. So what? lol I mean it is not like he is wooing me and sending a lot of letters and calling.
Not saying, "I want to do this for you and that for you. I have not treated you like I want to treat you....."
I have always been the last consideration for hi...
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debilyn
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8
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543
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I am progressing
(Preview)
When I first came to these rooms, I was lost. I had lost my A for a year, and my kids left to live with thier A Dad. It has been a very hard year for me, but with the help of Al-anon, my sponsor, and all of you. I am able to see progress in me. I am getting stronger and learning more everyday. I am also getting in touc...
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heartless39470
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6
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386
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Hi
(Preview)
Hi, this is my first time at any type of Al-Anon message board. I haven't been to a meeting either. I read several postings and started to cry. I have felt so alone in this and a lot of what I read mirrored how I feel. It is nice to know that there are others who can understand what I live through e...
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Alethea
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7
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478
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i could of miss the pain
(Preview)
Hi,
I could of missed the pain but than I would of missed the dance.I loved you and I am thankful I loved you.I am thankful for all you did in my life.Yes I mean all the drama the pain all of it.I landed in alanon where I got sanity for the first time in my life.
It got to me a place in my li...
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dori
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7
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445
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The end of a long day
(Preview)
Hi (((Everyone)))
It's late and I should be sleeping but I wanted to end my day here. After posting this morning I went with my A to his appointment, let me clarify I would have stayed home but the center confirmed to me and him that they would like me there to provide info he may not be capable of. unfortu...
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Jennifer
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4
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382
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test
(Preview)
-- Edited by lin0606 at 12:31, 2006-07-15
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lin0606
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2
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320
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He's Alive!
(Preview)
I got the shock of my life. Did not believe it the first time I visited A in jail. Went back yesterday. I was nervous and sat down. He comes out and it is not the monster, it is my husband.I did not think I would ever see him again
I got all unnerved and it was like my dreams where he is dead and is alive ag...
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debilyn
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17
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635
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Deb
(Preview)
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dori
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0
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265
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loneliness
(Preview)
i don't mind being alone. i actually enjoy it. but the loneliness is starting to get to me. not all the time. i am using my f2f and friends to talk about life and to get hugs. but i am missing the real intimacy. i'm not sure if it's part of missing my ah (who i think was served divorce papers yesterday) or if it'...
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serendipity
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5
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439
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Have I lost my mind, or found it?
(Preview)
Hello friends.
I don't know if this would be Alanon related.It's my LIFE,so I guess that's what this all about,right?
I am going to call work tomorrow and quit my job.I left there in tears today and have been crying ever since.Here's what happened.I was written up for doing something that I KNOW LO...
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drucilla06
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12
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792
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cdb
(Preview)
hi good to see you. I wanted to respond to your response.
I have been in alanon a good many years. Have seen my A husband go thru about everything.
I am not stranger to relapse, sobriety, recovery program to relapse and on and on.
I am not ignorant when it comes to aism.
Worry is not part of my...
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debilyn
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0
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311
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Jennifer/suicide
(Preview)
My A husband said that a lot. Then he was at his moms and did up too much H and died on the floor. The paramedics came and shocked him back.
sigh. What could I have done? Nothing. To me it was and is totally out of my control. I cannot commit him. He saw a counselor, I was outside the door listening. He t...
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debilyn
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1
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702
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Chanting Serenity Prayer, wanting to cry
(Preview)
Hi roomies,
I am at work right now and I am wishing I was at home.
I took my car to the shop on Friday. Thinking I was going to be spending about $1800 to get the car fixed. Well the guy called me Friday morning and said good news you don't need a new transmission, bad news the part I need won't be in until Mon...
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Dolphin123
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8
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1005
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Locked out!
(Preview)
Last night, went out for a evening with friends. My A decided after we agree not to stay out too late because I have been working 10-11 hour days to come home so I could get some rest. Guess I knew I never should have went the whole night was a mess. Me and His drinking buddy's wife left them both at the b...
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DoN4me
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6
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481
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Bass Assassin
(Preview)
Morning ((((Everyone))))
I had to laugh at myself this morning and I thought you guys(gals) might enjoy this too. These days my AW falls asleep in about 30 seconds and immediatly starts snoring.... LOUD. It is really amazing. I even recorded some of it on my phone. (coul...
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rtexas
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8
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463
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patience
(Preview)
Before al-anon I lived my life in a sea of frustration and feeling left out. I seethed with resentment day and night. These days I really seek to lessen resentments as best I can. I know how toxic they are.
These days I am struggling financially (when wasn't I?) but now when I come up again...
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maresie2
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4
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305
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ESH needed badly concerning suicide talk
(Preview)
Hello (((Everyone)))
Let me say first of all I am sorry i have not been able to contribute to the board as I would like to. There is not enough time in the day lately to work, finish house, talk to creditors, meditate, find strength to tune out my A and everything that goes along with it. And I have had the f...
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Jennifer
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11
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765
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Oh My Gosh,
(Preview)
Hiya roomies,
I just got off the phone with my daycare provider. And she had a very serious tone in her voice. So I was a little freaked. Here is our conversation.
Day Care Provider (DCP): Prepare yourself
Me: Crap, who is it this time (I have 3 kids)
DCP: The middle one
Me: Great, what she do thi...
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Dolphin123
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13
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620
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Home again...refreshed
(Preview)
Wow...my 2 week business trip, without A, was pretty wonderful.
I travelled 500 miles each way, towing a 20 ft trailer...proving to myself I could turn and back into any space whatsoever...found this out when a bridge was out on a country road and I had to negotiate my "rig" into a country driveway, b...
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Belongtome
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4
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525
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advantages of living with an adult who acts like a child lol
(Preview)
is..................................................Living
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hmrnrnmm
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7
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643
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letting go and letting god!
(Preview)
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Rebecca
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4
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422
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Here we go again!
(Preview)
I haven't posted for awhile; things were calmer since our last blow-up about a month ago. I'm sure the blow-up would've been two weeks ago, but A was able to go out and drink himself stupid with his relatives because of a wedding so I told him to go ahead and stay out as long as he wanted. There was no blow-up...
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Lindy
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3
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587
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hi Abbyal
(Preview)
Hi Abbyal, Today’s reading is the one you quote on this message board. I used to associate July 14 with Bastille Day. Later, my nephew was born on July 14, so this became his day. But since I’ve been reading the board, this is my July 14 thought. I agree - it's an awesome reading. You ca...
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Jill
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0
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306
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Have any of questioned weather or not you were an A too!
(Preview)
I have been struggeling with this very question for about a year now and my recovery has suffered huge!!! As I took the journey of recovery I began to question myself more and more and actually felt that I did not really belong in alanon at all. I have attended AA meetings and feel very comfo...
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jj
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9
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503
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Honor Your Emotions
(Preview)
((((((((((((((Family)))))))))))))))),
If anyone has a copy of Meoldy Beattie's book: More Language of Letting Go, this month's topic is theme is: Learn to Say How it Feels. I find this particularly relevant for both hubby and I because he's newly sober and I am learning to deal with a newly...
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Karilynn
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3
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385
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Well here is what I did
(Preview)
Hello (((Everyone)))
Thank you for your shares. I will reply more in depth later ... for now though I wanted to be sure to let you all know I am doing good. I decided the more info I had the better so I called every agebcy in town and county that would be involved if I had to do anything against his will. I got...
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Jennifer
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4
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394
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Getting on with life.
(Preview)
May 30th was my last posting.. it seems a life time ago, since then I have come a long way. I am still living on my own and at a secret address although My Ex A's family have contacted me asking where I lived, I didnt reveal anything. His last court appearance for damaging my daughters car was adjourn...
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penny
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4
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485
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