Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

bev · bev

well he came home from work alittle early today..he was in a so-so mood..my granddaughter just woke up from her nap and she was cranky,so my daughter was holding her and walking around the house trying to calm her down,he kep saying take her in the bedroom,so i dont have to hear here cry,i walked in...

lebe27 · lebe27

Hi all, Just thought some of you might be interested in the article. It pertains to a study to find the drunkest cities in the US. I find it interesting that they found them to be mostly located in the northeast or mid atlantic states (colder climate states) and that they appear to be citi...

LadyLibra · LadyLibra

A is not my husband. We have lived together for 5 years, we don't have children together, and I don't feel the same responsibility that everyone here seems to have in coping with their A. I care about A but I don't want to have to use coping skills to deal with his drinking and abuse. Ye...

LadyLibra · LadyLibra

My A has been out of the house for 6 days now and although I am keeping busy.. I have feelings of being alone....is it unusual to feel this way...although I feel better by not having to deal with his insulting drunk behavior He seems to be doing fine away from the house and for the most part I am to...

MarvlMan · MarvlMan

For over a year my girlfriend has been sober She told me last week, and did a month ago, that when she goes to college [she's only 18] she's not so sure she wants to be sober any more. Her roomate is in AA also, and sober now. I'm worried as hell. Can someone in AA drink casually? Get drunk once in awhile...

tishrijo · tishrijo

Mid July I asked my H if he loved me enough to let me go. I felt so tired and worn out from constantly taking care of him and picking up the messes he makes outta life. He said yes and we began the plan for him to get his own place. Ever since, things have for the most part been going great for...

Madison81 · Madison81

Hi. I'm somewhat new here and had a question. I have a family member who is an A, and that is the main reason I am involved with Al-anon. However, there are also many other drugs he is addicted to. Can I use al-anon for that as well? Or is is strictly for alcoholism?

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

Before joining this board I use to post all the time on a co-dependent board. They had an online journal that I use to post on frequently. I decided to go back and read thru my journal to see if I had made any progress. What I found is that I am still in the same situation that I was i...

Elizabeth M · Elizabeth M

Since I have been attending meetings and also stopped calling him home from the bar, my husband's drinking has gotten worse. He doesn't seem to care about me or his family at all anymore. Not much dialogue between us. What is there to say when he goes out every other night to his frie...

Gailey · Gailey

I just got off the phone with A son. His daughters are at my house. Hubby is also there. He has furniture in my guest house that I have been trying to get him to move out and clean the place up for I don't know how long. The kids came yesterday. He's been home since Wednesday night. He told me several different...

ollie · ollie

Hi everone, dont know if you remember me,if you dont a short version,h has been in homeless hostel since april,as i bodily threw him out clothes and all. this was a great move should have done it 3yrs ago,they have been a god send,they have helped him sort himself out,we meet up every sat beca...

maire rua · maire rua

Well, emailed terms and conditions for the future, was not long before he tried to have it his way again and forget negotiated agreement. Calmly reminded him of negotiaged agreement, stating why I could not fulfil new terms and told him I would continue until he found a replacement for me. I will reite...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

The silent treatment is a pet peeve of mine. My father was a pro growing up. My family was dsyfunctional though there were no drugs or alcohol involved. My father could go for days maybe weeks at a time when I was a teen with the silent treatment. I could not stand it then nor can I stand it now....

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

My A had an appt today at 8:15am. I set my clock and got up. I asked if she had set a clock she said the dogs would wake her up. So she got up & feed most all the dogs indoors. Gave meds, flushed vinnys wounds took him to pee, gave him water & fed him. Then doctored the two other dogs before she got dress...

maire rua · maire rua

Hi All, Still having problems with my short term job. One member of staff has tried to make my life hell this summer, I have been under constant surveillance. Unfortunately though this job finishes next week I will still need to have contact and as his behaviour is getting worse in relation to...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

After not hearing from my husband in a little more than week he calls me today at work to ask me (accuse me) if I had been over to the house. He works out of town during the week. Well I haven't and told him so. He said that someone thought they saw me in the neighborhood and he thoug...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, Need your views on this.... My Aboyfriend who I love very much and usually enjoy being with has recently changed jobs. This means he wants to move out of his house to be nearer work. (He cannot drive at the moment...lost his license) At the moment he shares with his drinking bu...

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

Monday I got to plan G before we left the house. I got home around 10:30am. she was suppose to be ready to go to town. I unloaded almost the entire car from the sale items by myself. I was thinking where the H is she? I went inside & she was still not ready. I sat down quietly and said nothing. She sai...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) I found this to be a great "mood setter" for me today. Thought you might like it. Everyone has so much going on, just for today... I am going to let today be a good day and not try to overthink or overdo anything. Just enjoy that the sun is up and I am here to enj...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello (((Everyone))) This is hard to write, hard to admit. I'm angry at myself for being jealous of others who have had the blessing of their A's finding recovery while still together, and with others that have hope of a life of recovery together. Logically I can think it is probably natural, and I am...

hersh · hersh

Please help me, God. I just found out that AH is talking to someone. It is so devastating. I am just so upset about it. I just can't believe he would ever ever do this. He hid the cell phone bill lastnight and I wondered why and I looked it up online today. He has been talk...

sisdragonfly1957 · sisdragonfly1957

I feel like a boulder has been removed from my chest. I can breath again! I know the truth. Found out ex was cheating on me. Confronted her and then him. He called me later that day to let me know I would never see his 6 year old son again (who I love very much) . When I confronted him in a very even voi...

ohera101 · ohera101

Hi all! I am really proud of myself....I finally seperated myself and my son from my AH the best I can. We already live seperately. He says he doesn't want to be married anymore. Or that's what he said originally. I can never tell if has a clue what he wants. He is working on finding his way to true recover...

LadyLibra · LadyLibra

I have been reading alot of the posts and they are helpful. In regarding about the infidelity I started wondering if my A has been unfaithful to me. Although I have never found anything to lead me in the direction I have often felt he was having flings which would be hard for me to prove becau...

Cyn · Cyn

Last summer I was desperately trying to make ends meet - working my tail off doing 3-4 jobs to feel like I wasnt counting pennies to pay for things. I had a deadbeat boyfriend who I loved dearly and thought he had the drive and determination to work for his future as well. All he was working fo...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((((((Family)))))))))), Well this Saturday is hubby's 47th birthday.

This week will also mark his 90 day + sobriety.

I can't believe that 3 months has passed since he was in ICU and I was preparing myself to the possibility of saying good bye to him.&nbs...

DoN4me · DoN4me

I am not quite sure how to put this in words so I will to my best to keep it brief. Lately, I have been feeling uncertain of things. Not so much my A. But me, and what I want. I have clarity on a few things but not everything. I know in the program it takes times. But I still feel at times I go threw a whole spectrum o...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

so i left my a a month and a half ago or longer. im happy and know in my heart i dont want to be with him. and that i deserve so much more. but right now my serenity is being destroyed. he is seriously mentally ill right now and telling me he is going to kill himself. i know most of you will tell me tha...

purpleraven · purpleraven

last night my A broke up with me again, this makes the 4th time. it seemed really, really real this time, so much so that i spent all night saying "goodbye" to him and mourning the end of the relationship (silently to myself while he slept, i mean). he kept saying he's "poisonous" and "toxic" to me, to my li...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((((((Family)))))))))))))), What does one look for in getting a sponsor? Can someone explain to me what is the criteria for becoming a sponsor? I know that there has to be a good connection between a sponsor and a sponsee, that's a given. But are there certain characte...

Gramma Pat · Gramma Pat

Speaking of the unfaithful partner, earlier this week I discovered that my AH had contacted a dating service and today I found a garage door opener and a set of keys that do not belong to us in our pickup glove box. I am stuck living with him until I get my legal questions answered soooooo my s...

lmt123 · lmt123

Ok, some of you know I have some issues with my 18 year old daughter. She is about to start college, and will be living at home and commuting. She absolutely thinks she is an adult, which she is, but she is acting so immature and selfish. She is almost DEMANDING that you treat her like a...

Jenni · Jenni

Hello All, I'm a member of Alanon f2f meetings and visit the Naranon Family website. I married an alcoholic at 20 (lasted a year), married a nice man (together 8 years) and then left him for a newly sober alcoholic (park bench drunk) who got sober in AA and has swapped the witch for the *itch (meth/ic...

Jennifer · Jennifer

(((Group))) For those who have read some/all of my saga, I am still stuck in the middle of it. For those that haven't I am too tired to go over it LOL Either way I wanted to check in and let you know I am still working on myself and the divorce. Keep ing my wits about me. stress levels are OK considering tha...

bogahome4 · bogahome4

Hi this is new to me...well i have a long history of alcoholism in my life...not myself but family members...I have been in a long distance realtionship with an alcoholic...I helped his family do an intervention...he took the help...was in the most prestigious facility in the country...for 2 days....

purpleraven · purpleraven

i was just saying in another post how i pray all day, and that helps me live my life, and especially life with my A. he's clean & sober, but he's still capable of acting like he's in the depths of drink or drugs. i give up trying to understand that!! then i realize that's what "let go and let God" might mean? i m...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((((((Family)))))))))), Lately I have been losing everything. Can't figure out why. Maybe I'm just overworked. Well I was lamenting to a friend one night, about how I have temporarily misplaced (I never loose anything, except my mind! lol

) a pearl earring th...

lilms · lilms

Isabela, I definitely

the queen of spoiled pets. My friends have always said that when they die they want to come back as one of my pets. You have me beat hands down, foot and scalp massages even

Thanks for making me laugh, lilms

smpoli · smpoli

Hello fellow MIP's! It has been awhile, but I am really hoping to get back with my program and come back to this site more often. I have missed so many of you! I am hanging in there. I am going through hell right now financially. I am still battling for my unemployment. ...

jj · jj

so i pop in to do some reading and see how some friends are doing and it gets me thinking... for thoes who know me on here know I grew up with an A dad and the married one!! We have known each other since I was 11 yrs old and got together when I was 17 I am now 29 we got married 2 yrs ago have 2 kids... Any hoo I...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

Let her know I've got the Al-anon materials together for her and they'll be in the mail Friday. Thank so much! I don't get into chat very much lately and just want her to know they are coming.

She can also e-mail me at Luna-moth@hotmail.com Thanks again!!

Gailey · Gailey

Living with aism in my life makes me angry and unhappy. As someone once wrote here before..."this is not the life I ordered", keeps coming back to my mind. One day at a time is something that I have not been working for awhile. I keep projecting things that will take place in the future if the A continu...

sld488 · sld488

As a part of keeping the focus on me, I have been thinking of changing jobs. I really like my job. Last year we moved and I now have to drive 45 miles to work and 45 miles back home. That's over 3 hours of my time and almost a 3rd of my paycheck(and gas is going up) I co...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Glad all of you are here. Glad to be here. I move into *my* apt this friday. Am so excited. I think. Am not certain because Mom is now advocating that I should move into dorm--like Dad has been advocating since I announced I had found an apt last March.

I'm really upset with this wom...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

((((Roomies))))), I am getting ready to celebrate my 1-year anniversary in Al-Anon - yeah! As many of us have, I have really struggled with getting my head around what detachment is, and last night I had a bit of a break through. I was completing an exercise on detachment in which I was asked to list...

LadyLibra · LadyLibra

I hardly know where to start. My boyfriend and I have lived together for 5 years and I am now realizing his drinking problem won't do away...no matter how it hurts me. He drinks every day and is verbally abusive to me, and when he does we fight and he leaves saying he is tried of me doing ...wha...

Georgia girl · Georgia girl

I've been married for 32 years, and I can't take it anymore!! My A has become so distant and hurtful... I'm afraid he's killing any love I have left for him. It's gotten progressively worse, and now I KNOW he's a full blown A... He forgets what he says, the next day after he's been drinking... talks to be li...

Samena · Samena

Wow.... it's nice to be back!!! It's been awhile since I've been here. Sooo much has happened... I was married to an Alcoholic/Addict for 10 years and two years ago divorced him b/c of his behavior after a night out painting the town red. The police were called and I ended up in the emergenc...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, I'd love to hear you views on this one! I have been told in the past (few years ago) that I can be quite stubborn (your way or no way....was the quote). I agree I can be this way at times. I think I am more willing to consider other's viewpoints now though. I have learned a lot and grown in th...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

That is the question that I keep asking myself. When is enough enough. I have read several books on alcoholism and go to both online and f2f meetings. I can accept that alcoholism is a disease. I can accept that certain behaviors of the alcoholic are typical and to think othe...

bev · bev

my husband and i have been together since 98,and since then he has been in and out of rehab six times,for drugs and alcohol{plus he is type 2 bi-polar}he was on probation for 3 years for many dui's.he started drinking and using drugs again in dec just 2 months after he got off probation,and it is getting w...

gardengal · gardengal

Something to think about.........something to explore just for yourself!!! I think us alanoners take so much time and energy worrying about the A's in our lives, we tend to put ourselves on the back burner of life. We take care, worry, try to fix, try to control everyone else around us, and yet let the m...

Linda Jean · Linda Jean

Hi everyone, I have been reading these posts with much interest. I have been going to see a therapist for the past 6 months, who has been helping me see my husband has an alcohol problem. I have been watching his drinking, but he typically drinks at night when I am in bed. He is a self employed writer who t...

Kris · Kris

Hi. After almost 14 years of marriage I told my husband I can't live like this anymore. And I don't know if I am doing the right thing or not. Because it hurts so much. My husband is a good man, loving, everything I ever wanted in a mate...but when he drinks too much which eventua...

serendipity · serendipity

my ex ah just called and we talked for about an hour. he sounds still slightly drunk. but he was reaching out from the disease. i stayed in my program. i spoke from my experience and told him that i have no answers for him. he came right out and told me that he wishes i could save him. and i told him that i can't....

serendipity · serendipity

the alanon speaker at our convention this past winter was incredible (ofcourse) and she had these steps which continue to crack me up and make me think. it is so close to who i was and who ican slip into being. i hope y'all enjoy them too! 1. discovered i was powerful over others and your lives wer...

serendipity · serendipity

my ex ah called to speak to the kids. they aren't home from camping. so, i was telling him about how the speaker's meeting last night (aa) the speaker was an old friend of ours who he went thru rehab with. i told him how neat it was to see him and how his story was great and it was just so nice to see an old friend....

hmrnrnmm · hmrnrnmm

We got to visit Vinny on Saturday. He is in alot of pain. The vet said he did 2 hours of surgery. 2 hernia repairs. He had drains on both sides & stables. He was sitting side saddled on the table. He let us hug & kiss on him. He looked so far away, I know he was hurting & probably going what wa...

debilyn · debilyn

and felt better. I called my regular dentist who said, for petes sake get in here NOW. so he and his great staff helped me out, did not charge me for the visit or xrays, so my bill was very low and I can make it in four payments!!! hp is good... I know I have been a pill. Being in pain is a drag. b...

artygirl · artygirl

As you may have read in my last two posts... I'm fed up with my alcoholic/cocaine-addicted hubby. He has not made any kind of effort to get his life together. He spent most of the weekend away from home on a binge. I have my mind made up that I want to separate from him... and most likely divorce him. In fact,...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	im so tried of my a/addicts abuse..plus im such a chicken (Preview) well he came home from work alittle early today..he was in a so-so mood..my granddaughter just woke up from her nap and she was cranky,so my daughter was holding her and walking around the house trying to calm her down,he kep saying take her in the bedroom,so i dont have to hear here cry,i walked in...	bev	5	459	Aug 26, 2006 by maresie2
	Forbes.com Article (Preview) Hi all, Just thought some of you might be interested in the article. It pertains to a study to find the drunkest cities in the US. I find it interesting that they found them to be mostly located in the northeast or mid atlantic states (colder climate states) and that they appear to be citi...	lebe27	3	390	Aug 26, 2006 by isabela40
	Not My Husband (Preview) A is not my husband. We have lived together for 5 years, we don't have children together, and I don't feel the same responsibility that everyone here seems to have in coping with their A. I care about A but I don't want to have to use coping skills to deal with his drinking and abuse. Ye...	LadyLibra	2	381	Aug 26, 2006 by isabela40
	Feelings of Being Alone (Preview) My A has been out of the house for 6 days now and although I am keeping busy.. I have feelings of being alone....is it unusual to feel this way...although I feel better by not having to deal with his insulting drunk behavior He seems to be doing fine away from the house and for the most part I am to...	LadyLibra	4	333	Aug 26, 2006 by Karilynn
	How Do You Be A Supportive Significant Other? (Preview) For over a year my girlfriend has been sober She told me last week, and did a month ago, that when she goes to college [she's only 18] she's not so sure she wants to be sober any more. Her roomate is in AA also, and sober now. I'm worried as hell. Can someone in AA drink casually? Get drunk once in awhile...	MarvlMan	4	498	Aug 26, 2006 by Karilynn
	Why now?..I too am about to Chicken Out (Preview) Mid July I asked my H if he loved me enough to let me go. I felt so tired and worn out from constantly taking care of him and picking up the messes he makes outta life. He said yes and we began the plan for him to get his own place. Ever since, things have for the most part been going great for...	tishrijo	4	474	Aug 25, 2006 by tishrijo
	More than just alcohol.... (Preview) Hi. I'm somewhat new here and had a question. I have a family member who is an A, and that is the main reason I am involved with Al-anon. However, there are also many other drugs he is addicted to. Can I use al-anon for that as well? Or is is strictly for alcoholism?	Madison81	2	334	Aug 25, 2006 by Madison81
	It's Time For Me To Let Go (Preview) Before joining this board I use to post all the time on a co-dependent board. They had an online journal that I use to post on frequently. I decided to go back and read thru my journal to see if I had made any progress. What I found is that I am still in the same situation that I was i...	JulieLynn	3	409	Aug 25, 2006 by Tammy
	getting worse (Preview) Since I have been attending meetings and also stopped calling him home from the bar, my husband's drinking has gotten worse. He doesn't seem to care about me or his family at all anymore. Not much dialogue between us. What is there to say when he goes out every other night to his frie...	Elizabeth M	6	459	Aug 25, 2006 by hersh
	OK...JUST NEED TO CALM DOWN (Preview) I just got off the phone with A son. His daughters are at my house. Hubby is also there. He has furniture in my guest house that I have been trying to get him to move out and clean the place up for I don't know how long. The kids came yesterday. He's been home since Wednesday night. He told me several different...	Gailey	6	610	Aug 25, 2006 by hersh
	FEELINGS ALL OVER THE PLACE (Preview) Hi everone, dont know if you remember me,if you dont a short version,h has been in homeless hostel since april,as i bodily threw him out clothes and all. this was a great move should have done it 3yrs ago,they have been a god send,they have helped him sort himself out,we meet up every sat beca...	ollie	2	418	Aug 25, 2006 by kismetstrand
	Bullying in the workplace contd (Preview) Well, emailed terms and conditions for the future, was not long before he tried to have it his way again and forget negotiated agreement. Calmly reminded him of negotiaged agreement, stating why I could not fulfil new terms and told him I would continue until he found a replacement for me. I will reite...	maire rua	2	365	Aug 25, 2006 by maire rua
	How do you deal with the silent treatment? (Preview) The silent treatment is a pet peeve of mine. My father was a pro growing up. My family was dsyfunctional though there were no drugs or alcohol involved. My father could go for days maybe weeks at a time when I was a teen with the silent treatment. I could not stand it then nor can I stand it now....	hmrnrnmm	3	499	Aug 25, 2006 by Jennifer
	I do not care & it is not my business (Preview) My A had an appt today at 8:15am. I set my clock and got up. I asked if she had set a clock she said the dogs would wake her up. So she got up & feed most all the dogs indoors. Gave meds, flushed vinnys wounds took him to pee, gave him water & fed him. Then doctored the two other dogs before she got dress...	hmrnrnmm	2	513	Aug 25, 2006 by maire rua
	re; bullying behaviour (Preview) Hi All, Still having problems with my short term job. One member of staff has tried to make my life hell this summer, I have been under constant surveillance. Unfortunately though this job finishes next week I will still need to have contact and as his behaviour is getting worse in relation to...	maire rua	4	403	Aug 25, 2006 by maire rua
	Just Needing to Vent (Preview) After not hearing from my husband in a little more than week he calls me today at work to ask me (accuse me) if I had been over to the house. He works out of town during the week. Well I haven't and told him so. He said that someone thought they saw me in the neighborhood and he thoug...	JulieLynn	4	301	Aug 25, 2006 by annmarie
	movin in? (Preview) Hi everyone, Need your views on this.... My Aboyfriend who I love very much and usually enjoy being with has recently changed jobs. This means he wants to move out of his house to be nearer work. (He cannot drive at the moment...lost his license) At the moment he shares with his drinking bu...	annmarie	8	382	Aug 25, 2006 by annmarie
	frustrations & how do you feel empathy for the active A? (Preview) Monday I got to plan G before we left the house. I got home around 10:30am. she was suppose to be ready to go to town. I unloaded almost the entire car from the sale items by myself. I was thinking where the H is she? I went inside & she was still not ready. I sat down quietly and said nothing. She sai...	hmrnrnmm	2	422	Aug 24, 2006 by hmrnrnmm
	Today is a new day (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) I found this to be a great "mood setter" for me today. Thought you might like it. Everyone has so much going on, just for today... I am going to let today be a good day and not try to overthink or overdo anything. Just enjoy that the sun is up and I am here to enj...	rtexas	2	400	Aug 24, 2006 by Jennifer
	Jealousy of others recovery (Preview) Hello (((Everyone))) This is hard to write, hard to admit. I'm angry at myself for being jealous of others who have had the blessing of their A's finding recovery while still together, and with others that have hope of a life of recovery together. Logically I can think it is probably natural, and I am...	Jennifer	10	538	Aug 24, 2006 by Jennifer
	I need HELP. (Preview) Please help me, God. I just found out that AH is talking to someone. It is so devastating. I am just so upset about it. I just can't believe he would ever ever do this. He hid the cell phone bill lastnight and I wondered why and I looked it up online today. He has been talk...	hersh	9	494	Aug 24, 2006 by smpoli
	IT'S FINALLY OVER!!!!! (Preview) I feel like a boulder has been removed from my chest. I can breath again! I know the truth. Found out ex was cheating on me. Confronted her and then him. He called me later that day to let me know I would never see his 6 year old son again (who I love very much) . When I confronted him in a very even voi...	sisdragonfly1957	7	561	Aug 24, 2006 by LadyLibra
	Detachment (Preview) Hi all! I am really proud of myself....I finally seperated myself and my son from my AH the best I can. We already live seperately. He says he doesn't want to be married anymore. Or that's what he said originally. I can never tell if has a clue what he wants. He is working on finding his way to true recover...	ohera101	6	478	Aug 24, 2006 by LadyLibra
	WONDERING (Preview) I have been reading alot of the posts and they are helpful. In regarding about the infidelity I started wondering if my A has been unfaithful to me. Although I have never found anything to lead me in the direction I have often felt he was having flings which would be hard for me to prove becau...	LadyLibra	5	331	Aug 24, 2006 by LadyLibra
	Looking back (Preview) Last summer I was desperately trying to make ends meet - working my tail off doing 3-4 jobs to feel like I wasnt counting pennies to pay for things. I had a deadbeat boyfriend who I loved dearly and thought he had the drive and determination to work for his future as well. All he was working fo...	Cyn	6	321	Aug 24, 2006 by just me
	A 90 day thank you & hubby's birthday (Preview) ((((((((((((Family)))))))))), Well this Saturday is hubby's 47th birthday. This week will also mark his 90 day + sobriety. I can't believe that 3 months has passed since he was in ICU and I was preparing myself to the possibility of saying good bye to him.&nbs...	Karilynn	7	550	Aug 24, 2006 by Rita G
	Question (Preview) I am not quite sure how to put this in words so I will to my best to keep it brief. Lately, I have been feeling uncertain of things. Not so much my A. But me, and what I want. I have clarity on a few things but not everything. I know in the program it takes times. But I still feel at times I go threw a whole spectrum o...	DoN4me	5	323	Aug 24, 2006 by kismetstrand
	suicide threats (Preview) so i left my a a month and a half ago or longer. im happy and know in my heart i dont want to be with him. and that i deserve so much more. but right now my serenity is being destroyed. he is seriously mentally ill right now and telling me he is going to kill himself. i know most of you will tell me tha...	notsonew1111	7	623	Aug 24, 2006 by canadianguy
	breakup, make up, breakup, ARGH! (Preview) last night my A broke up with me again, this makes the 4th time. it seemed really, really real this time, so much so that i spent all night saying "goodbye" to him and mourning the end of the relationship (silently to myself while he slept, i mean). he kept saying he's "poisonous" and "toxic" to me, to my li...	purpleraven	5	453	Aug 24, 2006 by TLC2
	Sponsor questions (Preview) (((((((((((((Family)))))))))))))), What does one look for in getting a sponsor? Can someone explain to me what is the criteria for becoming a sponsor? I know that there has to be a good connection between a sponsor and a sponsee, that's a given. But are there certain characte...	Karilynn	5	455	Aug 24, 2006 by Tiger2006
	Sick Thinking (Preview) Speaking of the unfaithful partner, earlier this week I discovered that my AH had contacted a dating service and today I found a garage door opener and a set of keys that do not belong to us in our pickup glove box. I am stuck living with him until I get my legal questions answered soooooo my s...	Gramma Pat	5	319	Aug 24, 2006 by Tiger2006
	need insight... (Preview) Ok, some of you know I have some issues with my 18 year old daughter. She is about to start college, and will be living at home and commuting. She absolutely thinks she is an adult, which she is, but she is acting so immature and selfish. She is almost DEMANDING that you treat her like a...	lmt123	6	388	Aug 24, 2006 by leo
	I'm Brand New Here (Preview) Hello All, I'm a member of Alanon f2f meetings and visit the Naranon Family website. I married an alcoholic at 20 (lasted a year), married a nice man (together 8 years) and then left him for a newly sober alcoholic (park bench drunk) who got sober in AA and has swapped the witch for the *itch (meth/ic...	Jenni	4	999	Aug 24, 2006 by maresie2
	Hello Everyone (Preview) (((Group))) For those who have read some/all of my saga, I am still stuck in the middle of it. For those that haven't I am too tired to go over it LOL Either way I wanted to check in and let you know I am still working on myself and the divorce. Keep ing my wits about me. stress levels are OK considering tha...	Jennifer	3	288	Aug 24, 2006 by Kris
	advice please (Preview) Hi this is new to me...well i have a long history of alcoholism in my life...not myself but family members...I have been in a long distance realtionship with an alcoholic...I helped his family do an intervention...he took the help...was in the most prestigious facility in the country...for 2 days....	bogahome4	4	338	Aug 24, 2006 by Kris
	let go and let God (Preview) i was just saying in another post how i pray all day, and that helps me live my life, and especially life with my A. he's clean & sober, but he's still capable of acting like he's in the depths of drink or drugs. i give up trying to understand that!! then i realize that's what "let go and let God" might mean? i m...	purpleraven	2	309	Aug 24, 2006 by Freatlast
	St. Piper (Preview) (((((((((((((Family)))))))))), Lately I have been losing everything. Can't figure out why. Maybe I'm just overworked. Well I was lamenting to a friend one night, about how I have temporarily misplaced (I never loose anything, except my mind! lol ) a pearl earring th...	Karilynn	5	349	Aug 24, 2006 by leo
	Isabela you definitely win!!! (Preview) Isabela, I definitely the queen of spoiled pets. My friends have always said that when they die they want to come back as one of my pets. You have me beat hands down, foot and scalp massages even Thanks for making me laugh, lilms	lilms	1	334	Aug 24, 2006 by isabela40
	Yes, I am still alive! LOL (Preview) Hello fellow MIP's! It has been awhile, but I am really hoping to get back with my program and come back to this site more often. I have missed so many of you! I am hanging in there. I am going through hell right now financially. I am still battling for my unemployment. ...	smpoli	5	372	Aug 24, 2006 by Maria123
	thinking out loud/babble and vent (Preview) so i pop in to do some reading and see how some friends are doing and it gets me thinking... for thoes who know me on here know I grew up with an A dad and the married one!! We have known each other since I was 11 yrs old and got together when I was 17 I am now 29 we got married 2 yrs ago have 2 kids... Any hoo I...	jj	1	347	Aug 23, 2006 by TLC2
	If you see Castaway in Chat Please... (Preview) Let her know I've got the Al-anon materials together for her and they'll be in the mail Friday. Thank so much! I don't get into chat very much lately and just want her to know they are coming. She can also e-mail me at Luna-moth@hotmail.com Thanks again!!	Lunamoth	1	336	Aug 23, 2006 by doxie
	How long will I allow myself to be angry? (Preview) Living with aism in my life makes me angry and unhappy. As someone once wrote here before..."this is not the life I ordered", keeps coming back to my mind. One day at a time is something that I have not been working for awhile. I keep projecting things that will take place in the future if the A continu...	Gailey	8	376	Aug 23, 2006 by April306
	business adventures! (Preview) As a part of keeping the focus on me, I have been thinking of changing jobs. I really like my job. Last year we moved and I now have to drive 45 miles to work and 45 miles back home. That's over 3 hours of my time and almost a 3rd of my paycheck(and gas is going up) I co...	sld488	1	271	Aug 23, 2006 by rtexas
	Progress not perfection.... (Preview) Glad all of you are here. Glad to be here. I move into my apt this friday. Am so excited. I think. Am not certain because Mom is now advocating that I should move into dorm--like Dad has been advocating since I announced I had found an apt last March. I'm really upset with this wom...	Tiger2006	3	400	Aug 23, 2006 by lin0606
	Detachment - One Baby Step At A Time (Preview) ((((Roomies))))), I am getting ready to celebrate my 1-year anniversary in Al-Anon - yeah! As many of us have, I have really struggled with getting my head around what detachment is, and last night I had a bit of a break through. I was completing an exercise on detachment in which I was asked to list...	BlueCloud	3	407	Aug 23, 2006 by Karilynn
	Hurting (Preview) I hardly know where to start. My boyfriend and I have lived together for 5 years and I am now realizing his drinking problem won't do away...no matter how it hurts me. He drinks every day and is verbally abusive to me, and when he does we fight and he leaves saying he is tried of me doing ...wha...	LadyLibra	7	413	Aug 23, 2006 by Georgia girl
	I feel like I'm going crazy!!! (Preview) I've been married for 32 years, and I can't take it anymore!! My A has become so distant and hurtful... I'm afraid he's killing any love I have left for him. It's gotten progressively worse, and now I KNOW he's a full blown A... He forgets what he says, the next day after he's been drinking... talks to be li...	Georgia girl	5	505	Aug 23, 2006 by Georgia girl
	A new beginning???? (Preview) Wow.... it's nice to be back!!! It's been awhile since I've been here. Sooo much has happened... I was married to an Alcoholic/Addict for 10 years and two years ago divorced him b/c of his behavior after a night out painting the town red. The police were called and I ended up in the emergenc...	Samena	2	276	Aug 23, 2006 by Tiger2006
	who's most stubborn do you think? (Preview) Hi everyone, I'd love to hear you views on this one! I have been told in the past (few years ago) that I can be quite stubborn (your way or no way....was the quote). I agree I can be this way at times. I think I am more willing to consider other's viewpoints now though. I have learned a lot and grown in th...	annmarie	5	449	Aug 23, 2006 by annmarie
	Do I want to keep doing this? (Preview) That is the question that I keep asking myself. When is enough enough. I have read several books on alcoholism and go to both online and f2f meetings. I can accept that alcoholism is a disease. I can accept that certain behaviors of the alcoholic are typical and to think othe...	JulieLynn	4	366	Aug 23, 2006 by Karilynn
	dont know what to do (Preview) my husband and i have been together since 98,and since then he has been in and out of rehab six times,for drugs and alcohol{plus he is type 2 bi-polar}he was on probation for 3 years for many dui's.he started drinking and using drugs again in dec just 2 months after he got off probation,and it is getting w...	bev	5	335	Aug 23, 2006 by bev
	Ask yourself....What do you really need to let the natural healing forces within you to go to work? (Preview) Something to think about.........something to explore just for yourself!!! I think us alanoners take so much time and energy worrying about the A's in our lives, we tend to put ourselves on the back burner of life. We take care, worry, try to fix, try to control everyone else around us, and yet let the m...	gardengal	4	312	Aug 23, 2006 by annmarie
	Considering Divorce, Seeking Advice (Preview) Hi everyone, I have been reading these posts with much interest. I have been going to see a therapist for the past 6 months, who has been helping me see my husband has an alcohol problem. I have been watching his drinking, but he typically drinks at night when I am in bed. He is a self employed writer who t...	Linda Jean	6	348	Aug 23, 2006 by smpoli
	New and Confused (Preview) Hi. After almost 14 years of marriage I told my husband I can't live like this anymore. And I don't know if I am doing the right thing or not. Because it hurts so much. My husband is a good man, loving, everything I ever wanted in a mate...but when he drinks too much which eventua...	Kris	2	373	Aug 23, 2006 by smpoli
	sainthood? (Preview) my ex ah just called and we talked for about an hour. he sounds still slightly drunk. but he was reaching out from the disease. i stayed in my program. i spoke from my experience and told him that i have no answers for him. he came right out and told me that he wishes i could save him. and i told him that i can't....	serendipity	3	399	Aug 23, 2006 by Jerry F
	12 steps pre- alanon (Preview) the alanon speaker at our convention this past winter was incredible (ofcourse) and she had these steps which continue to crack me up and make me think. it is so close to who i was and who ican slip into being. i hope y'all enjoy them too! 1. discovered i was powerful over others and your lives wer...	serendipity	1	441	Aug 22, 2006 by BlueCloud
	withdrawing my application for sainthood (Preview) my ex ah called to speak to the kids. they aren't home from camping. so, i was telling him about how the speaker's meeting last night (aa) the speaker was an old friend of ours who he went thru rehab with. i told him how neat it was to see him and how his story was great and it was just so nice to see an old friend....	serendipity	5	1227	Aug 22, 2006 by maresie2
	More on Vinny, etc (Preview) We got to visit Vinny on Saturday. He is in alot of pain. The vet said he did 2 hours of surgery. 2 hernia repairs. He had drains on both sides & stables. He was sitting side saddled on the table. He let us hug & kiss on him. He looked so far away, I know he was hurting & probably going what wa...	hmrnrnmm	2	251	Aug 22, 2006 by maresie2
	I woke up..... (Preview) and felt better. I called my regular dentist who said, for petes sake get in here NOW. so he and his great staff helped me out, did not charge me for the visit or xrays, so my bill was very low and I can make it in four payments!!! hp is good... I know I have been a pill. Being in pain is a drag. b...	debilyn	4	309	Aug 22, 2006 by maresie2
	I'm a huge chicken! (Preview) As you may have read in my last two posts... I'm fed up with my alcoholic/cocaine-addicted hubby. He has not made any kind of effort to get his life together. He spent most of the weekend away from home on a binge. I have my mind made up that I want to separate from him... and most likely divorce him. In fact,...	artygirl	4	342	Aug 22, 2006 by lin0606
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.