Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

hersh · hersh

(((Hi Everyone))) I went to a wonderful "Mixed Nuts" meeting lastnight with AAs and Alanons. I had a pretty deep conversation afterward with some great guys who are willing to 12 step my AH when the time arises. He is talking about the devil being in him, crying all the time, bein...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

A far away friend sent this to me today, thought I'd share: Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life: Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. Always read stuff that wil...

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi everyone, This is off topic, so please forgive me, A dear friend of my family was just diagnosed with lung cancer. She is young, vital, and dedicates so much of her free time to helping out in the High School, she is an amazing woman. Tonight her son who is very close to my kids came over in tears...

rtexas · rtexas

(((((Everyone))))) What is controling behavior really? If I trick, beg, plead or demand someone do "something" I am trying to control them, right? There are a number of behaviors that bother me in my wifes version of this disease. It dawned on my during last nights "session...

iwishuheaven · iwishuheaven

I haven't been on the forum for a while but today I needed to come back. It is abad day today. I have been going to f2f meetings for Al-Anon and ACOA, they have been helpingme but my biggest problem now is being able to share with my wife. Back in March of 2006 when I realized that I was not normal thanks to my wi...

gardengal · gardengal

For years I begged and pleaded with the A to listen to me...."I knew what I was talking about." To get help for his drinking problem. I struggled for many years dealing with his progression in his disease, and became more insane. I thought I knew "how to get him to stop" trying everything within my power t...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Out of todays ODAT "... Surrender to the will of god is not a passport to inertia" How true is it that I want to be able to simply avoid situations and hope they get better on thier own. Is that faith? .... ummmm probably not. Does let go and let God, mean never giv...

ZiggyDoodles · ZiggyDoodles

Fair warning...not for the weak. Way personal post...but need the ESH! I am sure most women can identify to this. I have had ovarian cysts for nearly 15 years now. One here, another here, two here. I have seen the dr. many times in the past for it. T...

Phil · Phil

"Some of us have so many voices in our heads, we could hold group therapy by ourselves," said Rokelle Lerner, a popular speaker and trainer on relationships, women's issues, and addicted family systems. This internal chorus is often composed of voices from our family of origin, voices of critica...

DoN4me · DoN4me

He got out of jail after 17 days on a 50 day sentance and started calling and emailing. I talked to him, immediately my new boundries came into play as the the roller coaster started again. He again wanted me to do things for him at my own expense and I FINALLY said nope can't help you with that I sure h...

Phil · Phil

One of the great gifts of the addiction recovery movement is the concept of detachment with love. Originally conceived as a way to relate to an alcoholic family member, detachment with love is actually a tool that we can apply with anyone. Al-Anon, a Twelve Step mutual-help group for friends and fa...

maresie2 · maresie2

The A's mother has gone. She is off three states away. Needless to say after all her demands she isn't unpacking her truck anytime soon. After weeks of her demands she is finally off the horizon. Now the A's brother enters. He is drinking to total excess, totally smashed eve...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

It is no longer good enough to cry peace, we must act peace, live peace, and live in peace. So, today in one of my meditation books, there was a novel idea presented to me. To summarize: Some people will never be happy because they **choose** not to be. Essentially, they believe that they are **unw...

Phil · Phil

The Al-Anon Promises “From Survival to Recovery” (page 269) -- Edited by tea2 at 22:55, 2006-10-19

babysteps · babysteps

Well, I am usually pretty good at detaching from my ah. He does his thing and I don't say anything about it. I presume that eventually he will see the light and make a change. I blew it this morning! Yesterday evening he was noticably intoxicated, went to bed early, was kind of irritating. I guess I have...

liliana · liliana

I have reached the point of full blown depression again. I cry constatly I have no intrest in any thing even the gym which has been my home away from home for 6 yrs. my husband drinks constanly he goes to the bar for lunch and stops at another bar before going home. i have such a fear of leaving yet i feel like i...

hudsond · hudsond

Sometimes I forget just how sick he is. My a husband has been completely sober for a little over 2 months--he has been sober from alcohol for 3 months. There are days his grouchiness really can get to me, or his mood swings and of course his selfishness, but then I think, yeah but he has come s...

hersh · hersh

((Everyone))) Why is it that I am becoming so aware that I have absolutely NO self-esteem and haven't for a long long time? I guess awareness is part of this program, but I am really finding out things about myself that I guess are helping me to grow but opening my eyes even wider with fear. ...

Mindy · Mindy

Ugh, what a frustrating weekend, I was surfing the net when my I.Explorer just died and spent 4 hours trying to fix it to find out...it's unfixable,lol. I wound up having to do a rescue boot form my cd which renders almost all of your progems unusable and once I got stuff reinstalled IT DID IT AGAIN!!! Tha...

Christy · Christy

My daughter just sent me this link of an up and coming singer. Not sure if I have ever heard a sadder song. Warning...it is about an abused child. This song will hopefully raise awareness. It's called Allysa Lies [url=http://www.myspace.com/jasonmichaelcarroll ]http://www.myspace.co...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Group))) I got a difficult case handed down to me this week at work and without getting into details it is bringing up some strong feelings in me not just of my A but another relationship I had several years ago. This family I'm working with has a father who is an A, not in recovery just dr...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((((((Family)))))))))), Good morning family. I got up early this morning and was dusting. I came across a box that hubby made for me in rehab 2 years ago as part of his art therapy. Now of course it has a pumpkin on it and it is filled with little pumpkins. But he also...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, I had a reality check today that I can view one of two ways, I saw my husband today for the first time in a month....the reality of his life makes me sad....also it makes me happy to know where I am right now... This awful thing called addiction is the most heart wrenching thing I hav...

arty · arty

She was married to an A for many years...she left him coz of the drinking,only to leave him for another A,who she then left for another one... Meanwhile, all the children in the family grew up in a household where this was normal behaviour. I made the mistake of calling her to talk about the problem i...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Enjoy! http://home.att.net/~scorh5/Pedal.html

rtexas · rtexas

(((((Everyone))))) So I sit here at my desk wondering why I would think our seperation would be any different than any other ridiculous argument we have ever had. Why would my reasons for wanting to seperate or my ideas about what a destructive force the drinking has become all of a sudden mak...

bluegrassgal · bluegrassgal

This is going to be a long post because I have so many feelings swirling around inside I might have trouble articulating them all. I seem to be dealing with most of the topics that have been listed for the next 2 weeks. Guilt, shame, self esteem and on and on. First of all I want to thank Tiger. She start...

Barbara · Barbara

Oct 17 is our wedding anniversary. We were first married in 1981 (divorced 1988, remarried 1989 but we still celebrate our wedding anniversary) Oct 17 2005 I sat in an AlAnon meeting (first meeting back this time) Oct 17 2006 my husband, 14yr son and I went out for a nice dinner Maybe AlAnon does w...

trapped one · trapped one

hi all, recently i've kinda slipped back in my recovery. i'm not working the steps and focusing more on other ppl than i am myself, and i feel like i did when i was a child, scared and alone. all my life i have had addiction in my life, first with my dad and mam, then later with my brothers and then with t...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

I was meeting with my sponsor last night and she and I were talking about procrastination. I have been seperated from my husband for almost a year but we tried working things out several times in that period. The last time that we were together was over 2 months ago and I still have no...

gknee · gknee

Hi all- I just looked back in my profile. no posting since April. Doesn't mean things have been right--but different. I have this part time job that kind of took on a life of its own this summer--good for the $$, questionable for the home situation. H has continued to smoke pot daily and once in a whil...

DoN4me · DoN4me

Boundries, this is a tuffy for me. I would give in at the blink of an eye. I didn't realize it until lately. When I give in on my boundries who is the one that it is really hurting? Is it hurting the person that the boundry was put up for. Or is it hurting me because that is why the boundry was put up to...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello (((Everyone))) I heard a message on my phone tonight, from a drinking buddy of my AH's. The line I remember is "you deserve a break from pretending to be the good boyfriend, come out with us ... it's our treat". It hurt. Been having a hard time handling being here lately. Am I ready to walk away?...

jaja · jaja

What are meetings for families, friends,etc. of drug addicted titled? Is there a difference between those meetings and Al-Anon? What would the difference be since they are both re-lated to the substance addict? Does it matter which you go to? Tx...jaja

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Went to f2f tonight and a guy asked me how long would it take you to trust your husband again? I thought and at first said it would depend on the situation, if he was a few hours late getting home is one thing, if he doesn't come home all night that's another. But then I said before I can trust that he's doing th...

Tammy · Tammy

Well, today is my birthday and I am feeling pretty good today :) I am 39 and have 2 teenagers am living alone with my A husband living in a camper on the other side of town. He has been gone just over a month and I miss him terribly. He is trying very hard and although he slipped last week all and all has made a h...

kicky · kicky

After 6 years of the chaos,I asked my A to get into to rehab or move out...6 days ago. He of couse said rehab wasn't necessary...so he would move out. But nothing is in motion!....But I've flipped before and caved before...so I think he's waiting for me to cave again. I feel strong and very deter...

Phil · Phil

Ring ring! Tech support: Hello can I help you? Customer: Well, after much consideration, I have decided to install Love. Can you guide me through the process? Tech Support: Yes, ma'am I can help you, are you ready to proceed? Customer: Well, I'm not very technical, but I think I'm ready. What do I do fir...

purplebutterfly · purplebutterfly

Hello I am at a lose of how to handle this. My daughter is hyperactive and sometimes comes home wound up. Some of the times it isn't from her getting into the foods shes not suppose to. Well my A drives me crazy with "What's she been into this time?" A lot of the time its just my daughter...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

((((Everyone)))) I was going to post how sad I was tonight, but I decided to read a few posts/responses first. I'm so glad I did

, I must have picked two that were meant for me to read because I laughed so hard. Today is my 14 wedding anniversary. Last night the A and I dis...

athena12 · athena12

I read the following poem for my mom at her funeral: For her old friends:     &...

ET · ET

(((((Hi Alanon Friends!)))) I wanted to share something that a friend sent me when I really needed it. I'm not saying that this is an easy thing to do because I am still "letting go" of a lot of "stuff" myself (we all know that it's an ongoing process.... a slow one at that). I found this to be very ins...

shadow1 · shadow1

I’m searching for some ES&H on letting go. I don’t do it very well and have struggled with it for a while. I did finally let someone go that I thought was out of my life for good. It took a long time for me to do this but I finally got to the point that I could say to myself it is finished. I have felt tha...

ally · ally

((((((((((((ROOMIES)))))))))))

This has been a difficult week for me. For my emotional wellbeing. I have not been to f2f for last two weeks. This is has become a pattern for me. I jump wholeheartedly into my programme. Then when I struggle with something, I pull back from it. So...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((Jerry F)))))))), Just wanted to make sure you and your family are safe in Hawaii. Hope you came through it okay. Let us know. Sending prayers your way. Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty

Becky1 · Becky1

Well, as some of you know, I had a major meltdown last week, and punched (many times) my freshly painted kitchen wall. That was on Sat., last week. It left a hole, not real big, but knuckle sized. My walls are painted green, so the white drywall really showed thru. And i...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

((((((Everyone)))))) After giving it some thought about my part in the things going on in my life (thank you Christy

) I've come to a few conclusions... the biggest one is the day of my last post I was finding it very easy to blame my A. I spoke the truth, I am in many ways the way I am because...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Group))) I have learned that just because an A gets sober doesn't mean that everything is magically changed. My A still struggles with old behavior patterns. He's stubborn and strong willed. He gets into these power struggles with me or with other people over issues...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Someone posted last week about A's and druggies getting on a moral high horse or thinking they know better what to do in all situations etc. I just wanted to revisit that. My A last weekend took the kids to the beach (first time he's been alone with them anywhere ever that I can remember) and...

barisax · barisax

After looking at my previous post, I thought maybe I should bring this topic up. It's not something I discuss in my normal circle at all. In part because it just doesn't come up, but also because I don't want to be chided for not being able to let go. I have been divorced longer than I was married... for...

notsonew1111 · notsonew1111

this song really touches me with my current situation. its called let him fly by jessica simpson. Ain't no talkin to this man Ain't no pretty other side Ain't no way to understand the stupid words of pride It would take an acrobat, and I already tried all that so I'm gonna let him fly Things can...

BlueCloud · BlueCloud

Dear Roomies, For as long as I can remember, I have been very afraid of things that I can't control (lightening storms, illness, and war). I worried about storms, illness, and war ALOT as a kid. I can see now that I may have been doing this as a way of expressing how worried I was about how out of control...

hersh · hersh

(((Hi everyone))) Well I did get away for Friday and Saturday night. I almost changed my mind at the last minute, got really sad Friday at work and canceled the reservations where I was going to go. I just wanted to be home, whether AH was drunk or not, there or not, just wanted to pine away...

Phil · Phil

The Language of Letting Go. Feelings and Surrender Surrendering is a highly personal and spiritual experience. Surrender is not something we can do in our heads. It is not something we can force or control by willpower. It is something we experience. Acceptance, or surrender, is not a ti...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Today I find myself thinking about how far out of my comfort zone I am in putting a big boundry in place. Has it really been that long ago that I stuck to what was right, just because it was the right thing to do? The answer of course is yes, it's been a long time. I have s...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) For those wondering if the A and I went on our date... yes we did. It is an unusual place. Our city is a little bit of everything. To the east and south is flat farmland, and to the west is hills. In the middle of those hills is a beautiful lake. For those of y...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

I'm letting it all out tonight, hope you all don't mind. My mother is dieing. She is all but gone now. My father who recently had a heart attack and open heart surgery is determined to keep her home. I look at her and my heart is just is so full of sadness. Last night...

Phil · Phil

Don't Quit Author Unknown When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, When the road your trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low and the debts are high, And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit Rest if you must, but...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, I just need to vent today, I suppose. I know there's nothing I can do, but I still worry. He left the house yesterday morning when I was out. I called him when I got back. He said he'd be back in a couple of hours. (I knew he was dying to drink and I don't allow drink in my house.) Anyway,...

debilyn · debilyn

Strange to sit here and not know what to say. It's that way becuz it is all feelings. Have expresssed how much harder it is this time, to find my foundation again. It was so easy for the disease to play me. Let's let him out of the cocoon for awhile, let her have a taste of her soul mate, her lover. Then whe...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Getting better at detaching? (Preview) (((Hi Everyone))) I went to a wonderful "Mixed Nuts" meeting lastnight with AAs and Alanons. I had a pretty deep conversation afterward with some great guys who are willing to 12 step my AH when the time arises. He is talking about the devil being in him, crying all the time, bein...	hersh	2	394	Oct 20, 2006 by Rita G
	Dealing with the burdens of life. (Preview) A far away friend sent this to me today, thought I'd share: Here are some great ways of dealing with the burdens of life: Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them. Always read stuff that wil...	carolinagirl	5	362	Oct 20, 2006 by hersh
	Prayers please (Preview) Hi everyone, This is off topic, so please forgive me, A dear friend of my family was just diagnosed with lung cancer. She is young, vital, and dedicates so much of her free time to helping out in the High School, she is an amazing woman. Tonight her son who is very close to my kids came over in tears...	Jeannie	7	534	Oct 20, 2006 by rtexas
	Controling behaviors (Preview) (((((Everyone))))) What is controling behavior really? If I trick, beg, plead or demand someone do "something" I am trying to control them, right? There are a number of behaviors that bother me in my wifes version of this disease. It dawned on my during last nights "session...	rtexas	8	499	Oct 20, 2006 by Noni
	unable to open up... (Preview) I haven't been on the forum for a while but today I needed to come back. It is abad day today. I have been going to f2f meetings for Al-Anon and ACOA, they have been helpingme but my biggest problem now is being able to share with my wife. Back in March of 2006 when I realized that I was not normal thanks to my wi...	iwishuheaven	6	497	Oct 20, 2006 by Noni
	ARE YOU WILLING TO ADMIT YOU DONT HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS? (Preview) For years I begged and pleaded with the A to listen to me...."I knew what I was talking about." To get help for his drinking problem. I struggled for many years dealing with his progression in his disease, and became more insane. I thought I knew "how to get him to stop" trying everything within my power t...	gardengal	7	456	Oct 20, 2006 by Noni
	Good morning... (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Out of todays ODAT "... Surrender to the will of god is not a passport to inertia" How true is it that I want to be able to simply avoid situations and hope they get better on thier own. Is that faith? .... ummmm probably not. Does let go and let God, mean never giv...	rtexas	2	284	Oct 20, 2006 by just me
	Ladies some ESH please (Preview) Fair warning...not for the weak. Way personal post...but need the ESH! I am sure most women can identify to this. I have had ovarian cysts for nearly 15 years now. One here, another here, two here. I have seen the dr. many times in the past for it. T...	ZiggyDoodles	11	504	Oct 20, 2006 by Noni
	Self-care is about setting boundaries, letting go (Preview) "Some of us have so many voices in our heads, we could hold group therapy by ourselves," said Rokelle Lerner, a popular speaker and trainer on relationships, women's issues, and addicted family systems. This internal chorus is often composed of voices from our family of origin, voices of critica...	Phil	1	444	Oct 20, 2006 by irish54
	A got out of jail (Preview) He got out of jail after 17 days on a 50 day sentance and started calling and emailing. I talked to him, immediately my new boundries came into play as the the roller coaster started again. He again wanted me to do things for him at my own expense and I FINALLY said nope can't help you with that I sure h...	DoN4me	8	540	Oct 20, 2006 by DoN4me
	Detatchment With Love Takes On Deeper Meaning (Preview) One of the great gifts of the addiction recovery movement is the concept of detachment with love. Originally conceived as a way to relate to an alcoholic family member, detachment with love is actually a tool that we can apply with anyone. Al-Anon, a Twelve Step mutual-help group for friends and fa...	Phil	3	477	Oct 20, 2006 by kingston
	The A's Brother crashes (Preview) The A's mother has gone. She is off three states away. Needless to say after all her demands she isn't unpacking her truck anytime soon. After weeks of her demands she is finally off the horizon. Now the A's brother enters. He is drinking to total excess, totally smashed eve...	maresie2	2	368	Oct 20, 2006 by Karilynn
	Thoughts on my morning meditation (Preview) It is no longer good enough to cry peace, we must act peace, live peace, and live in peace. So, today in one of my meditation books, there was a novel idea presented to me. To summarize: Some people will never be happy because they choose not to be. Essentially, they believe that they are **unw...	Tiger2006	5	404	Oct 19, 2006 by artygirl
	Yupper!! (Preview) The Al-Anon Promises “From Survival to Recovery” (page 269) -- Edited by tea2 at 22:55, 2006-10-19	Phil	2	414	Oct 19, 2006 by tea2
	I slipped (Preview) Well, I am usually pretty good at detaching from my ah. He does his thing and I don't say anything about it. I presume that eventually he will see the light and make a change. I blew it this morning! Yesterday evening he was noticably intoxicated, went to bed early, was kind of irritating. I guess I have...	babysteps	6	326	Oct 19, 2006 by maresie2
	i feel lost and alone (Preview) I have reached the point of full blown depression again. I cry constatly I have no intrest in any thing even the gym which has been my home away from home for 6 yrs. my husband drinks constanly he goes to the bar for lunch and stops at another bar before going home. i have such a fear of leaving yet i feel like i...	liliana	6	390	Oct 19, 2006 by maresie2
	Sometimes-I forget (long) (Preview) Sometimes I forget just how sick he is. My a husband has been completely sober for a little over 2 months--he has been sober from alcohol for 3 months. There are days his grouchiness really can get to me, or his mood swings and of course his selfishness, but then I think, yeah but he has come s...	hudsond	4	361	Oct 19, 2006 by maresie2
	Signs of progress.... (Preview) ((Everyone))) Why is it that I am becoming so aware that I have absolutely NO self-esteem and haven't for a long long time? I guess awareness is part of this program, but I am really finding out things about myself that I guess are helping me to grow but opening my eyes even wider with fear. ...	hersh	4	379	Oct 19, 2006 by maresie2
	I am so Angry!!! (Preview) Ugh, what a frustrating weekend, I was surfing the net when my I.Explorer just died and spent 4 hours trying to fix it to find out...it's unfixable,lol. I wound up having to do a rescue boot form my cd which renders almost all of your progems unusable and once I got stuff reinstalled IT DID IT AGAIN!!! Tha...	Mindy	8	535	Oct 19, 2006 by maresie2
	Get your kleenex.. (off topic) (Preview) My daughter just sent me this link of an up and coming singer. Not sure if I have ever heard a sadder song. Warning...it is about an abused child. This song will hopefully raise awareness. It's called Allysa Lies [url=http://www.myspace.com/jasonmichaelcarroll ]http://www.myspace.co...	Christy	0	379	Oct 19, 2006 by Christy
	Some days... (Preview) (((Hello Group))) I got a difficult case handed down to me this week at work and without getting into details it is bringing up some strong feelings in me not just of my A but another relationship I had several years ago. This family I'm working with has a father who is an A, not in recovery just dr...	twinmom2	3	334	Oct 19, 2006 by Christy
	A pumpkin recovery box (Preview) (((((((((((((Family)))))))))), Good morning family. I got up early this morning and was dusting. I came across a box that hubby made for me in rehab 2 years ago as part of his art therapy. Now of course it has a pumpkin on it and it is filled with little pumpkins. But he also...	Karilynn	3	363	Oct 19, 2006 by Lexie
	Accepting the truth (Preview) Hello Friends, I had a reality check today that I can view one of two ways, I saw my husband today for the first time in a month....the reality of his life makes me sad....also it makes me happy to know where I am right now... This awful thing called addiction is the most heart wrenching thing I hav...	Andrea12	7	394	Oct 19, 2006 by hersh
	my future mother-in-law...the enabler (Preview) She was married to an A for many years...she left him coz of the drinking,only to leave him for another A,who she then left for another one... Meanwhile, all the children in the family grew up in a household where this was normal behaviour. I made the mistake of calling her to talk about the problem i...	arty	5	480	Oct 19, 2006 by Karilynn
	How do You Think of God/HP? (Preview) Enjoy! http://home.att.net/~scorh5/Pedal.html	wallsal55	3	387	Oct 19, 2006 by drucilla06
	All I need is this can.... and maybe this chair (Preview) (((((Everyone))))) So I sit here at my desk wondering why I would think our seperation would be any different than any other ridiculous argument we have ever had. Why would my reasons for wanting to seperate or my ideas about what a destructive force the drinking has become all of a sudden mak...	rtexas	11	580	Oct 18, 2006 by artygirl
	starting over (Preview) This is going to be a long post because I have so many feelings swirling around inside I might have trouble articulating them all. I seem to be dealing with most of the topics that have been listed for the next 2 weeks. Guilt, shame, self esteem and on and on. First of all I want to thank Tiger. She start...	bluegrassgal	4	319	Oct 18, 2006 by Maria123
	Oct 17 2005 vs 2006 (Preview) Oct 17 is our wedding anniversary. We were first married in 1981 (divorced 1988, remarried 1989 but we still celebrate our wedding anniversary) Oct 17 2005 I sat in an AlAnon meeting (first meeting back this time) Oct 17 2006 my husband, 14yr son and I went out for a nice dinner Maybe AlAnon does w...	Barbara	8	363	Oct 18, 2006 by Maria123
	not enough focus on myself. (Preview) hi all, recently i've kinda slipped back in my recovery. i'm not working the steps and focusing more on other ppl than i am myself, and i feel like i did when i was a child, scared and alone. all my life i have had addiction in my life, first with my dad and mam, then later with my brothers and then with t...	trapped one	6	591	Oct 18, 2006 by trapped one
	Procrastination (Preview) I was meeting with my sponsor last night and she and I were talking about procrastination. I have been seperated from my husband for almost a year but we tried working things out several times in that period. The last time that we were together was over 2 months ago and I still have no...	JulieLynn	2	322	Oct 18, 2006 by just me
	long time--no board (Preview) Hi all- I just looked back in my profile. no posting since April. Doesn't mean things have been right--but different. I have this part time job that kind of took on a life of its own this summer--good for the $$, questionable for the home situation. H has continued to smoke pot daily and once in a whil...	gknee	4	309	Oct 18, 2006 by carolinagirl
	Boundries (Preview) Boundries, this is a tuffy for me. I would give in at the blink of an eye. I didn't realize it until lately. When I give in on my boundries who is the one that it is really hurting? Is it hurting the person that the boundry was put up for. Or is it hurting me because that is why the boundry was put up to...	DoN4me	5	941	Oct 18, 2006 by DoN4me
	Ready or not .... (Preview) Hello (((Everyone))) I heard a message on my phone tonight, from a drinking buddy of my AH's. The line I remember is "you deserve a break from pretending to be the good boyfriend, come out with us ... it's our treat". It hurt. Been having a hard time handling being here lately. Am I ready to walk away?...	Jennifer	5	696	Oct 18, 2006 by hersh
	meetings for families of drug addicts (Preview) What are meetings for families, friends,etc. of drug addicted titled? Is there a difference between those meetings and Al-Anon? What would the difference be since they are both re-lated to the substance addict? Does it matter which you go to? Tx...jaja	jaja	5	5562	Oct 18, 2006 by Noni
	How to trust again??? (Preview) Went to f2f tonight and a guy asked me how long would it take you to trust your husband again? I thought and at first said it would depend on the situation, if he was a few hours late getting home is one thing, if he doesn't come home all night that's another. But then I said before I can trust that he's doing th...	carolinagirl	9	699	Oct 18, 2006 by Noni
	Feeling pretty good .. !! Todays my BIRTHDAY (Preview) Well, today is my birthday and I am feeling pretty good today :) I am 39 and have 2 teenagers am living alone with my A husband living in a camper on the other side of town. He has been gone just over a month and I miss him terribly. He is trying very hard and although he slipped last week all and all has made a h...	Tammy	8	407	Oct 18, 2006 by hersh
	He isn't showing any signs of leaving. (Preview) After 6 years of the chaos,I asked my A to get into to rehab or move out...6 days ago. He of couse said rehab wasn't necessary...so he would move out. But nothing is in motion!....But I've flipped before and caved before...so I think he's waiting for me to cave again. I feel strong and very deter...	kicky	3	322	Oct 18, 2006 by Noni
	Tech Support For Installing Love (Preview) Ring ring! Tech support: Hello can I help you? Customer: Well, after much consideration, I have decided to install Love. Can you guide me through the process? Tech Support: Yes, ma'am I can help you, are you ready to proceed? Customer: Well, I'm not very technical, but I think I'm ready. What do I do fir...	Phil	8	599	Oct 18, 2006 by thinkstoomuch
	Frustrated MOM (Preview) Hello I am at a lose of how to handle this. My daughter is hyperactive and sometimes comes home wound up. Some of the times it isn't from her getting into the foods shes not suppose to. Well my A drives me crazy with "What's she been into this time?" A lot of the time its just my daughter...	purplebutterfly	5	711	Oct 18, 2006 by Noni
	The pain of change.. (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) I was going to post how sad I was tonight, but I decided to read a few posts/responses first. I'm so glad I did , I must have picked two that were meant for me to read because I laughed so hard. Today is my 14 wedding anniversary. Last night the A and I dis...	Lunamoth	4	375	Oct 18, 2006 by Karilynn
	Poems I read for Mom's eulogy (Preview) I read the following poem for my mom at her funeral: For her old friends:     &...	athena12	4	4888	Oct 18, 2006 by athena12
	Let it go! (a little long, but great!) (Preview) (((((Hi Alanon Friends!)))) I wanted to share something that a friend sent me when I really needed it. I'm not saying that this is an easy thing to do because I am still "letting go" of a lot of "stuff" myself (we all know that it's an ongoing process.... a slow one at that). I found this to be very ins...	ET	7	451	Oct 17, 2006 by sandie123
	Lessons Learned (Preview) I’m searching for some ES&H on letting go. I don’t do it very well and have struggled with it for a while. I did finally let someone go that I thought was out of my life for good. It took a long time for me to do this but I finally got to the point that I could say to myself it is finished. I have felt tha...	shadow1	3	446	Oct 17, 2006 by notsonew1111
	CONFUSED.COM (Preview) ((((((((((((ROOMIES))))))))))) This has been a difficult week for me. For my emotional wellbeing. I have not been to f2f for last two weeks. This is has become a pattern for me. I jump wholeheartedly into my programme. Then when I struggle with something, I pull back from it. So...	ally	6	423	Oct 17, 2006 by mac57
	Jerry F (Preview) (((((((((Jerry F)))))))), Just wanted to make sure you and your family are safe in Hawaii. Hope you came through it okay. Let us know. Sending prayers your way. Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty	Karilynn	2	473	Oct 17, 2006 by DanaAngel
	His Fault/My Fault??? (Preview) Well, as some of you know, I had a major meltdown last week, and punched (many times) my freshly painted kitchen wall. That was on Sat., last week. It left a hole, not real big, but knuckle sized. My walls are painted green, so the white drywall really showed thru. And i...	Becky1	7	525	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	My part in things.... (Preview) ((((((Everyone)))))) After giving it some thought about my part in the things going on in my life (thank you Christy ) I've come to a few conclusions... the biggest one is the day of my last post I was finding it very easy to blame my A. I spoke the truth, I am in many ways the way I am because...	Lunamoth	4	450	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	Compromising with the A (Preview) (((Hello Group))) I have learned that just because an A gets sober doesn't mean that everything is magically changed. My A still struggles with old behavior patterns. He's stubborn and strong willed. He gets into these power struggles with me or with other people over issues...	twinmom2	2	426	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	Recovery High Horse (Preview) Someone posted last week about A's and druggies getting on a moral high horse or thinking they know better what to do in all situations etc. I just wanted to revisit that. My A last weekend took the kids to the beach (first time he's been alone with them anywhere ever that I can remember) and...	carolinagirl	3	495	Oct 17, 2006 by jaja
	Still In Love With the X? (Preview) After looking at my previous post, I thought maybe I should bring this topic up. It's not something I discuss in my normal circle at all. In part because it just doesn't come up, but also because I don't want to be chided for not being able to let go. I have been divorced longer than I was married... for...	barisax	9	641	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	lyrics on letting go (Preview) this song really touches me with my current situation. its called let him fly by jessica simpson. Ain't no talkin to this man Ain't no pretty other side Ain't no way to understand the stupid words of pride It would take an acrobat, and I already tried all that so I'm gonna let him fly Things can...	notsonew1111	1	330	Oct 17, 2006 by Becky1
	Coping With Triggers (Preview) Dear Roomies, For as long as I can remember, I have been very afraid of things that I can't control (lightening storms, illness, and war). I worried about storms, illness, and war ALOT as a kid. I can see now that I may have been doing this as a way of expressing how worried I was about how out of control...	BlueCloud	2	525	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	In Limbo.... (Preview) (((Hi everyone))) Well I did get away for Friday and Saturday night. I almost changed my mind at the last minute, got really sad Friday at work and canceled the reservations where I was going to go. I just wanted to be home, whether AH was drunk or not, there or not, just wanted to pine away...	hersh	3	384	Oct 17, 2006 by Jerry F
	Feelings And Surrender (Preview) *The Language of Letting Go. Feelings and Surrender* Surrendering is a highly personal and spiritual experience. Surrender is not something we can do in our heads. It is not something we can force or control by willpower. It is something we experience. Acceptance, or surrender, is not a ti...	Phil	7	683	Oct 17, 2006 by Phil
	Comfort and Chaos (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Today I find myself thinking about how far out of my comfort zone I am in putting a big boundry in place. Has it really been that long ago that I stuck to what was right, just because it was the right thing to do? The answer of course is yes, it's been a long time. I have s...	rtexas	4	380	Oct 17, 2006 by just me
	Old habits hard to break (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) For those wondering if the A and I went on our date... yes we did. It is an unusual place. Our city is a little bit of everything. To the east and south is flat farmland, and to the west is hills. In the middle of those hills is a beautiful lake. For those of y...	rtexas	8	404	Oct 17, 2006 by rtexas
	long vent (Preview) I'm letting it all out tonight, hope you all don't mind. My mother is dieing. She is all but gone now. My father who recently had a heart attack and open heart surgery is determined to keep her home. I look at her and my heart is just is so full of sadness. Last night...	Lunamoth	6	375	Oct 17, 2006 by Mindy
	For Those That Are Having A rough Time...And Are Struggling.. (Preview) Don't Quit Author Unknown When things go wrong, as they sometimes will, When the road your trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low and the debts are high, And you want to smile, but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit Rest if you must, but...	Phil	4	465	Oct 17, 2006 by carolinagirl
	he stayed away (Preview) Hi everyone, I just need to vent today, I suppose. I know there's nothing I can do, but I still worry. He left the house yesterday morning when I was out. I called him when I got back. He said he'd be back in a couple of hours. (I knew he was dying to drink and I don't allow drink in my house.) Anyway,...	annmarie	2	297	Oct 17, 2006 by hersh
	It hurts (Preview) Strange to sit here and not know what to say. It's that way becuz it is all feelings. Have expresssed how much harder it is this time, to find my foundation again. It was so easy for the disease to play me. Let's let him out of the cocoon for awhile, let her have a taste of her soul mate, her lover. Then whe...	debilyn	13	1287	Oct 17, 2006 by hersh
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