Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

MizzB · MizzB

After being so angry earlier and then talking to ABF he left to stay in a hotel. Says he needs space and the flat is becoming "toxic". I feel really sad because it feels like he's still trying to put the blame on me. When I am on school holidays I can work the program well. I can detach with love. I can self lo...

Lyne · Lyne

Working the program: The writer talks about needing diligence, patience, and consistency for the best results in recovery. He says that at times we will reach plateaus and feel stuck. He says that putting one foot in front of the other will end plateaus, open doorways, and we can see that no time wa...

Tude · Tude

After almost 21 years, Mothers Day is still the hardest day for me. Not for myself, but for the mothers who have lost children. I never know what to say and by now.....it seems I should. I love my mother dearly, I see what she has gone through, I've gone through much of "it" with her and still...my heart bre...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... ... Was prompted, from a posting last week, or so, to pull put my Bog Book and read the section- on "The Family Afterwards". This book was the first text used at Alanon meetings in the very early days... I read the chapter "to wives" the very first... pitched to our "mums" as the first teac...

LinSC · LinSC

To all the Mothers and Grandmothers who have struggled to learn Al-anon ways, and have survived to be the best they can be inspite of the problems and sometimes chaos that goes on around them because of alcohol and other addictions. Happy Mothers Day to you, well deserved..... From Linsc Mother and G...

andromeda · andromeda

I could use a refresher course on this today. My bf came down with shingles on my bday 2 days ago. Poor man is suffering horribly but he keeps trying to do too much, he winds up in pain, and he has been barking orders and being crabby at all of us today. I know how hard it is to be positive when you are in pain b...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the power of the serenity prayer. Specifically, the writer mentions how helpful it can be to repeat the prayer and break it into three parts when the mind needs quieting. Accept the things I cannot change (It is helpful to think of a few in order to let go)...

Overcome · Overcome

May 12, 2018SATURDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING 10AM (7AM PACIFIC)TOPICS: Topics: "Self-will run riot", Resisting change, One Day at a Time, Open topic as it relates to alcoholism or living with an alcoholic.The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatro...

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

I hear that Pele may be getting angry with volanic eruptions and earthquakes south of you. Is everything going ok for you and yours in Hilo? Kenny

lookingup · lookingup

The C2C reading for May 12 speaks about developing faith and trust in a power greater than ourselves. The reading points out that often we feel alone and that nothing exists that cares about us. It suggests that we reflect on some of the negative happenings of our lives so that we can see that even in ou...

hotrod · hotrod

Today is the 11th Anniversary of my son's passing from this disease. I intend to spend it remembering his smile, laugh and spirit and will not be posting or responding to posts. See you tomorrow Stephen Owen King (March 4, 1966 - May 6, 2007) - Online Memorial WebsiteStephen Owen King Memorial...

DavidG · DavidG

Toroa nui, toroa roa, toroa iti i te hauiti... The albatross sours high, but in small wind, it is small. In Ao-NZ each tribe or clan has its own sayings, and songs, so I coined this one myself. On our own we are nothing sometimes. At best we are lonely and at worst we are scared and terrified. I was always s...

Dorothylynn · Dorothylynn

I am not on here often, but I so appreciate the advice and encouragement I always receive when I do remember to get on. The past few days Iâve really been struggling with replaying bad memories of my husband when he was drinking. He has been sober since December, but I still have so much anxiety, and it is...

andromeda · andromeda

I came to program 7 years ago with a heavy heart. My alcoholic father had died the month prior and my alcoholic spouse was spiraling deeper into his addiction and, after finding him passed out drunk and naked on the toilet at 5 AM, I knew I needed help! My father was an alcoholic and I was married to my XAH...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP. Today's reading talks about the most important relationship each of us will ever have - the one with self! We spend more time with self than anyone else so wouldn't it make sense to put energy into making that relationship awesome? Another person can't prevent us from feeling lone...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Aaannnddd .. the XAH is off and running again with no communication and I'm trying to balance that in the midst of being very PMS. So I'm trying to breathe .. and remember this is all going to workout again and right here and now is why my XAH is an a$$ with a capital "A". What I have learned in this process i...

Lil99 · Lil99

Hi everyone, I have an important decision to make this weekend and I don't know what to do. My alcoholic partner is passed out at the moment and I don't feel like he's in a place where I can discuss it with him. I don't know who I can talk to. Trying to seek guidance from my Higher Power, but how will I know or...

Iamhere · Iamhere

In today's reading, the writer talks about gratitude for our fellowship where everyone speaks for himself or herself. There is no authority who tells what 'our' experience has been, and each of us speaks for him/her self. The sharing of experience, strength and hope helps us learn specific ways in...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I swear my life is the Truman Show .. I live in an alternate universe and there is a camera crew following me around .. LOL. They are looking for my Lucy reactions to things that happen .. and boy are they there. Jerry Springer should call me for a storyline, I'm totally trying to stay in my own hula hoop an...

Zara0308 · Zara0308

Good morning everyone! I just have a question I was hoping to get feedback on. When can someone become a sponsor? Do you need to have finished all your steps before accepting to be someone's else's sponsor?

Overcome · Overcome

May 10, 2018THURSDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM TOPICS: Topic: Self-Indulgence vs. Thinking of Others and Open topic.Meeting lasts approximately an hour and a half. Chat afterwards.The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are ot...

Dutchy · Dutchy

We've just come to the end of a 4 day bank holiday weekend and it's been a good one and I will take that for what it is. After last weekend, with my recovering husband in a very bad way whilst I visited him with our girls and his mum phoning on Monday saying her was in bed and not at work I spoke to him on the phone...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Today's reading in Courage to Change is about learning to like ourselves. The author shares that their feelings of self-worth had sunk while living with an active alcoholic to the point that they did not see their own positive traits, and could not accept the compliments of others. The author's spo...

gabigail · gabigail

Hi everyone- In addition to working on the steps and our own re overt, having a loved one with an alcoholic issue is never easy. In my own recovery and self-care, Ive been working on daily affirmations. At first they seemed cheesy, but for me they really work. In my own recovery, part of it is the loss of se...

MaryGondwe · MaryGondwe

I wrote this poem 4 years ago as a way of coping with my husband's addiction to alcohol. It helped to think of alcohol as a mistress; seductive, yet still a choice. Just reading it has helped me feel better so many times. So I want to share it with others now that it isn't so raw. Hopefully it helps someone el...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Greetings MIP family..... I am reminded daily that I am a work-in-progress, and life, although much better than before, continues to offer up its challenges. I am a long time member of MIP, who had a bit of a falling out with John a few years back, so I chose to stop participating/posting on here anymo...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for May 8 speaks about the 'freedom" that we receive by practicing the Al-Anon program. It points out that when we first enter the program we are prisoners of our own confusion and despair--. However, when we start working the program, we soon discover that we have been released from...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how many of us have spent time regretting things we have done or said, held on to anger, and wished for a different past or reality. The writer mentions that reading Alanon literature with consistency began to change his/her perspective and living in t...

pinkchip · pinkchip

Hey guys. I miss you and this board. I have been thinking about MIP quite a bit as I took over family programming at the new treatment center I am working at. Working with the families has been hard work but an honor. If I did not know alanon, I would be at a severe disadvantage and I owe almost all my knowl...

blueskies18 · blueskies18

I'm so sad. I know I am not managing well with my AH. First post, maybe this is not the right place I don't know. I hurt his feelings. I can't bear it. I feel like I did the wrong thing now. It's a roller coaster

Lyne · Lyne

Alcoholism is a disease: The writer spoke of the need to accept alcoholism as a real disease, just like tuberculosis or diabetes. With that acceptance , she could stop trying to cure her loved one. She also decided to stop blaming the alcoholic, for it was beyond his/her control. The best thing sh...

mamalioness · mamalioness

its been a while I don't even know where to start except I have been on a "house deep fixing up" cleaning, and I mean DEEP cleaning, painting, upgrading lil things here and there and even some larger things...The place looks so much cleaner, happier and updated, LOL...yea, I know how to scrub down stuf...

DavidG · DavidG

Hi y'all... when I first arrived here my hometown group had collapsed. It was a shocker for me. I discussed the reasons then- and do not need to do this now. The nearest group is only 30 mins away... and I have been a few times. Last time I went a newer member had called for a group conscience- and wa...

serenity47 · serenity47

I can finally start to see some progress in myself. It has taken a long while to get to this stage of detaching and accepting. For a long long while I tried to control the outcome for my AD. I set boundaries but they were not really boundaries they were manipulations to get her to conform and change. I...

VickiR · VickiR

Hi everyone, Looking for some ESH. I sold my house this week (hooray!) - bittersweet obviously, I love my home but I know it will set me free to move to my own place and leave this behind. My STBXAH pulled some last minute extortion on offer night, trying to threaten me into giving him a bunch of money now b...

Dutchy · Dutchy

This evening we had our 4th couples counselling and the first thing my husband said was that he relapsed on Monday. I'm not angry about that. I was just relieved I wasn't there. He hasn't told his mum, who he lives with, which I think he should but again that's up to him. What I am angry about is that the coun...

Overcome · Overcome

Saturday Morning Alanon Meeting 10 a.m. EST starting now. May 5 2018SATURDAY MORNING & EVENING AL-ANON MEETING 10AM & 9PM EST (7AM & 6PM PACIFIC)TOPICS: Verbal Abuse, Detaching from it. The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.h...

Jerry F · Jerry F

When I first arrived at the front door of Al-Anon in 1979 I had no idea what I was getting into even when knowing I didn't want to get into anything. I didn't know and didn't know I didn't know however so much was being brought to my attention and eventually my Higher Power removed my resistance to it. I...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Good morning MIP! Today's reading discusses humility. The writer learned in recovery that humility is not measured by how much I do for others, but by willingness to do our part in our relationship with the God of our understanding. We begin to learn what humility is when we take the First Step. By a...

Aline · Aline

Hi, MIP friends, I want to run by you the latest development in the ex-abf saga. I received an e-mail from him, sent from his grandfather's e-mail address, the contents similar to the previous messages - he's depressed, doesn't want to live anymore, nobody helps him, I'm bad as I do not reply to his plea...

Isthisreallife · Isthisreallife

My AH is a mess and I'm not sure what to do. He s decided to try to detox at home. He drinks 1/2 gallon a day and thinks he can just quit(I told him I think he needs an inpatient program). He didn't go cold turkey and has been drinking. However, he looks like death. He's pale, sweating, shaking, keeps falling a...

Iamhere · Iamhere

The Courage reading is about finding ourselves through the Al-Anon program - especially Steps 4 and 5. Many of us arrive lost, neglected and just not too sure who we are. We'e been consumed with the A(s) and others in our life to the point we can share more about their likes/dislikes than our own. Th...

joker · joker

I have not been on this site for a bit, but I have been reading on line and attending meetings. I decided to go out and meet a new man and see if I can get back on track with my life. I met a man 2 months ago and he seemed like a really great guy. To good to be true. My head started spinning as what he said and did appea...

oceanpine · oceanpine

hi all, I have not posted here in a very long time, and am due for an update... soon! I do visit and read almost daily, and I thank you for all the wisdom, dedication and compassion displayed here on a daily/hourly basis! I have two friends who have both recently lost their husbands due to alcohol-related...

williamedward27 · williamedward27

there are many problems with friends and families and alcohol in my life, both parents, a sibling, friends, etc; thus i am a member of alanon. . i have had decades long problems with the dogma of this program. i am an agnostic, (an atheist, really, in the sense that i believe in no deities), and this isn't...

Skorpi · Skorpi

Today's reading in courage to change is about accepting the help of HP and Al-Anon friends instead of stubbornly holding on to problems ourselves. The author shared that they sometimes are fixated on a problem, they cannot hear the guidance HP is sending their way. When they let go of their need to co...

MizzB · MizzB

Saturday - ABF suicidal. I go pick him up. SUnday - "tapering" - 10 beers Monday - he gets sent home from work for "not functioning" - he'd taken diazapam Tuesday - call from his mum, police have been involved as he was suicidal, took out a lot of money and disappeared Wednesday - He's in hospital and his mu...

jess144 · jess144

How long does it usually take to find a sponsor? I would like to start step work and to my understanding, you can't start without one. I've been doing F2F meetings and I try going to different ones to meet new people. So far I really haven't met anyone that I've clicked with or thought "this is the one." ...

Dutchy · Dutchy

For the first time in 4 weeks I took the girls to see my recovering husband at his mums where he is still staying. As soon as I got out of the car I saw something was wrong. He had either been drinking or he'd had a few seizures/absences. My mother confirmed that he was sober, hadn't been drinking but that he'...

hotrod · hotrod

The ODAT reading for May first speaks about the Al-Anon and AA program being founded on a spiritual basis. The reading points out that both programs acknowledge our dependence on a power greater than ourselves and the thousands of Al-Anon and AA groups around the world have members of many faiths an...

Dancer66 · Dancer66

Ugh. It seems like no matter how many Alanon meetings I go to or what I read I don't know the answer. And this question is something my problem drinker husband questions when the issue comes up. Why does his drinking bother me now? And I know that others say it doesn't matter if it bothers me it bothers...

hotrod · hotrod

Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step five has been posted to the step work board please join in and share your thoughts. Here is the link http://stepwo...

Lyne · Lyne

Stubborness: The writer discussed letting his faucet drip and over time it did extensive damage. It forced him to get help. With Alanon he learned he can handle things differently. Sharing in meetings and putting experience into words, has allowed him to no longer push problems aside. He can n...

Dalbert · Dalbert

Yes, another thread, : ) So, my A gets bad sinus infections about every 6 weeks. Do I need to tell an ICU nurse that alcohol is hurting her immune system? No, I don't think so. So anyway, she was sick on Thursday. I asked her if she needed some NyQuil. We didn't have any so I offered to go get some for her. On the...

Iamhere · Iamhere

Part of my weekly routine includes watching Joel on Sunday mornings. It often speaks to me and this morning was pulling me in big time. While the title is kind of strange, this episode lines up really well with our recovery I believe.... A brief summary from the video: It's easy to judge others, but un...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about making amends. I can relate to the writers description of feeling that he/she were owed amends. The idea that we, who have lived life navigating the behavior of our As, should be the ones to make amends seemed backward somehow. In my great days of mart...

Dancer66 · Dancer66

I am SO thankful for this site and for all of you and your support. This disease is so horrible and takes such a toll on relationships and families. I could really use hearing some shares of survival or success. Living with a AH who is in denial is so hard. How do you manage when the other person is so con...

lookingup · lookingup

The C 2C reading for April 28 speaks about entering the rooms of Al-Anon and discovering a bright new world. of understanding and supportive people. The reading suggests that we can join this group by uncovering the "Courage" to be honest about our inner thoughts and inner feelings. We are oft...

Dutchy · Dutchy

I felt so strong in the last weeks and as I read my thoughts about communication in couples counselling I just found myself crumbling. We ended last week on the fact that my and recovering husband don't communicate. It's quite clear that a lack of communication lies with my husband. I've always been a b...

Karebear · Karebear

Hello everyone, I am going absolutely crazy today. I have been in a funk and crying all day. I feel like my ABF is upset with me because of this. He drank last night and although I think I handled last night well, I did not handle this morning or today well at all. I have that overwhelming fear again... that...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	After the storm (Preview) After being so angry earlier and then talking to ABF he left to stay in a hotel. Says he needs space and the flat is becoming "toxic". I feel really sad because it feels like he's still trying to put the blame on me. When I am on school holidays I can work the program well. I can detach with love. I can self lo...	MizzB	15	812	May 15, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	C2C, 5/14 (Preview) Working the program: The writer talks about needing diligence, patience, and consistency for the best results in recovery. He says that at times we will reach plateaus and feel stuck. He says that putting one foot in front of the other will end plateaus, open doorways, and we can see that no time wa...	Lyne	4	757	May 14, 2018 by andromeda
	Mothers Day through the eyes of the last sibling... (Preview) After almost 21 years, Mothers Day is still the hardest day for me. Not for myself, but for the mothers who have lost children. I never know what to say and by now.....it seems I should. I love my mother dearly, I see what she has gone through, I've gone through much of "it" with her and still...my heart bre...	Tude	4	859	May 14, 2018 by Tude
	Reading from the AA Big Book... (Preview) Hi y'all... ... Was prompted, from a posting last week, or so, to pull put my Bog Book and read the section- on "The Family Afterwards". This book was the first text used at Alanon meetings in the very early days... I read the chapter "to wives" the very first... pitched to our "mums" as the first teac...	DavidG	18	860	May 14, 2018 by hotrod
	Best Wishes To You (Preview) To all the Mothers and Grandmothers who have struggled to learn Al-anon ways, and have survived to be the best they can be inspite of the problems and sometimes chaos that goes on around them because of alcohol and other addictions. Happy Mothers Day to you, well deserved..... From Linsc Mother and G...	LinSC	5	715	May 14, 2018 by Dutchy
	Staying on my side of the street (Preview) I could use a refresher course on this today. My bf came down with shingles on my bday 2 days ago. Poor man is suffering horribly but he keeps trying to do too much, he winds up in pain, and he has been barking orders and being crabby at all of us today. I know how hard it is to be positive when you are in pain b...	andromeda	6	872	May 13, 2018 by Bo
	Hope for Today May 13 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about the power of the serenity prayer. Specifically, the writer mentions how helpful it can be to repeat the prayer and break it into three parts when the mind needs quieting. Accept the things I cannot change (It is helpful to think of a few in order to let go)...	yanksfan51	4	692	May 13, 2018 by andromeda
	Morning meeting starting now (Preview) May 12, 2018SATURDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING 10AM (7AM PACIFIC)TOPICS: Topics: "Self-will run riot", Resisting change, One Day at a Time, Open topic as it relates to alcoholism or living with an alcoholic.The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatro...	Overcome	10	724	May 13, 2018 by Tude
	JerryF, how are things? (Preview) I hear that Pele may be getting angry with volanic eruptions and earthquakes south of you. Is everything going ok for you and yours in Hilo? Kenny	KennyFenderjazz	15	872	May 12, 2018 by milkwood
	CTC 5-12 (Preview) The C2C reading for May 12 speaks about developing faith and trust in a power greater than ourselves. The reading points out that often we feel alone and that nothing exists that cares about us. It suggests that we reflect on some of the negative happenings of our lives so that we can see that even in ou...	lookingup	3	719	May 12, 2018 by Iamhere
	Remembering my son ( 1 2 ) (Preview) Today is the 11th Anniversary of my son's passing from this disease. I intend to spend it remembering his smile, laugh and spirit and will not be posting or responding to posts. See you tomorrow Stephen Owen King (March 4, 1966 - May 6, 2007) - Online Memorial WebsiteStephen Owen King Memorial...	hotrod	41	1636	May 12, 2018 by hotrod
	Stretching my wings a little further.... (Preview) Toroa nui, toroa roa, toroa iti i te hauiti... The albatross sours high, but in small wind, it is small. In Ao-NZ each tribe or clan has its own sayings, and songs, so I coined this one myself. On our own we are nothing sometimes. At best we are lonely and at worst we are scared and terrified. I was always s...	DavidG	4	777	May 12, 2018 by Tude
	Struggling with memories and triggers (Preview) I am not on here often, but I so appreciate the advice and encouragement I always receive when I do remember to get on. The past few days Iâve really been struggling with replaying bad memories of my husband when he was drinking. He has been sober since December, but I still have so much anxiety, and it is...	Dorothylynn	6	627	May 12, 2018 by Jerry F
	A message to the newcomers (Preview) I came to program 7 years ago with a heavy heart. My alcoholic father had died the month prior and my alcoholic spouse was spiraling deeper into his addiction and, after finding him passed out drunk and naked on the toilet at 5 AM, I knew I needed help! My father was an alcoholic and I was married to my XAH...	andromeda	11	861	May 12, 2018 by mamalioness
	Courage to Change 5/11/18 (Preview) Good morning MIP. Today's reading talks about the most important relationship each of us will ever have - the one with self! We spend more time with self than anyone else so wouldn't it make sense to put energy into making that relationship awesome? Another person can't prevent us from feeling lone...	Iamhere	7	654	May 11, 2018 by Tude
	And this is why .. (Preview) Aaannnddd .. the XAH is off and running again with no communication and I'm trying to balance that in the midst of being very PMS. So I'm trying to breathe .. and remember this is all going to workout again and right here and now is why my XAH is an a$$ with a capital "A". What I have learned in this process i...	SerenityRUS	14	2275	May 11, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	Important decision to make (Preview) Hi everyone, I have an important decision to make this weekend and I don't know what to do. My alcoholic partner is passed out at the moment and I don't feel like he's in a place where I can discuss it with him. I don't know who I can talk to. Trying to seek guidance from my Higher Power, but how will I know or...	Lil99	6	925	May 11, 2018 by Jerry F
	Courage to Change 5/10/18 (Preview) In today's reading, the writer talks about gratitude for our fellowship where everyone speaks for himself or herself. There is no authority who tells what 'our' experience has been, and each of us speaks for him/her self. The sharing of experience, strength and hope helps us learn specific ways in...	Iamhere	3	789	May 11, 2018 by Dorothylynn
	As the stomach turns .. (Preview) I swear my life is the Truman Show .. I live in an alternate universe and there is a camera crew following me around .. LOL. They are looking for my Lucy reactions to things that happen .. and boy are they there. Jerry Springer should call me for a storyline, I'm totally trying to stay in my own hula hoop an...	SerenityRUS	7	696	May 10, 2018 by el-cee
	Sponsorship (Preview) Good morning everyone! I just have a question I was hoping to get feedback on. When can someone become a sponsor? Do you need to have finished all your steps before accepting to be someone's else's sponsor?	Zara0308	6	702	May 10, 2018 by Jerry F
	Thursday Morning meeting starting now (Preview) May 10, 2018THURSDAY MORNING AL-ANON MEETING 9 AM TOPICS: Topic: Self-Indulgence vs. Thinking of Others and Open topic.Meeting lasts approximately an hour and a half. Chat afterwards.The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are ot...	Overcome	3	613	May 10, 2018 by hotrod
	It was a good weekend (Preview) We've just come to the end of a 4 day bank holiday weekend and it's been a good one and I will take that for what it is. After last weekend, with my recovering husband in a very bad way whilst I visited him with our girls and his mum phoning on Monday saying her was in bed and not at work I spoke to him on the phone...	Dutchy	15	797	May 10, 2018 by Dutchy
	Courage to Change May 9 (Preview) Today's reading in Courage to Change is about learning to like ourselves. The author shares that their feelings of self-worth had sunk while living with an active alcoholic to the point that they did not see their own positive traits, and could not accept the compliments of others. The author's spo...	Skorpi	6	907	May 10, 2018 by DavidG
	Using Affirmations in Self-care (Preview) Hi everyone- In addition to working on the steps and our own re overt, having a loved one with an alcoholic issue is never easy. In my own recovery and self-care, Ive been working on daily affirmations. At first they seemed cheesy, but for me they really work. In my own recovery, part of it is the loss of se...	gabigail	8	752	May 9, 2018 by canadianguy
	A mistress called Addiction (Preview) I wrote this poem 4 years ago as a way of coping with my husband's addiction to alcohol. It helped to think of alcohol as a mistress; seductive, yet still a choice. Just reading it has helped me feel better so many times. So I want to share it with others now that it isn't so raw. Hopefully it helps someone el...	MaryGondwe	4	708	May 9, 2018 by KennyFenderjazz
	Home is where the heart is.... (Preview) Greetings MIP family..... I am reminded daily that I am a work-in-progress, and life, although much better than before, continues to offer up its challenges. I am a long time member of MIP, who had a bit of a falling out with John a few years back, so I chose to stop participating/posting on here anymo...	canadianguy	13	844	May 9, 2018 by Skorpi
	ODAT 5-8-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for May 8 speaks about the 'freedom" that we receive by practicing the Al-Anon program. It points out that when we first enter the program we are prisoners of our own confusion and despair--. However, when we start working the program, we soon discover that we have been released from...	hotrod	6	637	May 8, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today May 6 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about how many of us have spent time regretting things we have done or said, held on to anger, and wished for a different past or reality. The writer mentions that reading Alanon literature with consistency began to change his/her perspective and living in t...	yanksfan51	10	632	May 8, 2018 by mamalioness
	Checking in with gratitude (Preview) Hey guys. I miss you and this board. I have been thinking about MIP quite a bit as I took over family programming at the new treatment center I am working at. Working with the families has been hard work but an honor. If I did not know alanon, I would be at a severe disadvantage and I owe almost all my knowl...	pinkchip	11	686	May 7, 2018 by bud
	I really need to talk to someone (Preview) I'm so sad. I know I am not managing well with my AH. First post, maybe this is not the right place I don't know. I hurt his feelings. I can't bear it. I feel like I did the wrong thing now. It's a roller coaster	blueskies18	8	753	May 7, 2018 by Bo
	C2C, 5/7 (Preview) Alcoholism is a disease: The writer spoke of the need to accept alcoholism as a real disease, just like tuberculosis or diabetes. With that acceptance , she could stop trying to cure her loved one. She also decided to stop blaming the alcoholic, for it was beyond his/her control. The best thing sh...	Lyne	3	599	May 7, 2018 by Iamhere
	Just dropping in to say "howdy" and hope all of you are fine (Preview) its been a while I don't even know where to start except I have been on a "house deep fixing up" cleaning, and I mean DEEP cleaning, painting, upgrading lil things here and there and even some larger things...The place looks so much cleaner, happier and updated, LOL...yea, I know how to scrub down stuf...	mamalioness	8	925	May 7, 2018 by mamalioness
	Talking up the group here... (Preview) Hi y'all... when I first arrived here my hometown group had collapsed. It was a shocker for me. I discussed the reasons then- and do not need to do this now. The nearest group is only 30 mins away... and I have been a few times. Last time I went a newer member had called for a group conscience- and wa...	DavidG	14	667	May 6, 2018 by hotrod
	Detach/Acceptance (Preview) I can finally start to see some progress in myself. It has taken a long while to get to this stage of detaching and accepting. For a long long while I tried to control the outcome for my AD. I set boundaries but they were not really boundaries they were manipulations to get her to conform and change. I...	serenity47	4	686	May 6, 2018 by Aline
	Visitation and next steps (Preview) Hi everyone, Looking for some ESH. I sold my house this week (hooray!) - bittersweet obviously, I love my home but I know it will set me free to move to my own place and leave this behind. My STBXAH pulled some last minute extortion on offer night, trying to threaten me into giving him a bunch of money now b...	VickiR	8	1848	May 5, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	Do I have the right to be angry? (Preview) This evening we had our 4th couples counselling and the first thing my husband said was that he relapsed on Monday. I'm not angry about that. I was just relieved I wasn't there. He hasn't told his mum, who he lives with, which I think he should but again that's up to him. What I am angry about is that the coun...	Dutchy	28	951	May 5, 2018 by Jerry F
	Al-Anon Meeting Starting now. (Preview) Saturday Morning Alanon Meeting 10 a.m. EST starting now. May 5 2018SATURDAY MORNING & EVENING AL-ANON MEETING 10AM & 9PM EST (7AM & 6PM PACIFIC)TOPICS: Verbal Abuse, Detaching from it. The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.h...	Overcome	2	584	May 5, 2018 by Overcome
	Working the program (Preview) When I first arrived at the front door of Al-Anon in 1979 I had no idea what I was getting into even when knowing I didn't want to get into anything. I didn't know and didn't know I didn't know however so much was being brought to my attention and eventually my Higher Power removed my resistance to it. I...	Jerry F	12	779	May 4, 2018 by Jerry F
	Courage to Change 5/3/18 (Preview) Good morning MIP! Today's reading discusses humility. The writer learned in recovery that humility is not measured by how much I do for others, but by willingness to do our part in our relationship with the God of our understanding. We begin to learn what humility is when we take the First Step. By a...	Iamhere	11	768	May 4, 2018 by DavidG
	Powerlessness / what's within my power (Preview) Hi, MIP friends, I want to run by you the latest development in the ex-abf saga. I received an e-mail from him, sent from his grandfather's e-mail address, the contents similar to the previous messages - he's depressed, doesn't want to live anymore, nobody helps him, I'm bad as I do not reply to his plea...	Aline	22	821	May 4, 2018 by Aline
	Detox @home (Preview) My AH is a mess and I'm not sure what to do. He s decided to try to detox at home. He drinks 1/2 gallon a day and thinks he can just quit(I told him I think he needs an inpatient program). He didn't go cold turkey and has been drinking. However, he looks like death. He's pale, sweating, shaking, keeps falling a...	Isthisreallife	14	810	May 4, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	Courage to Change 5/4/18 (Preview) The Courage reading is about finding ourselves through the Al-Anon program - especially Steps 4 and 5. Many of us arrive lost, neglected and just not too sure who we are. We'e been consumed with the A(s) and others in our life to the point we can share more about their likes/dislikes than our own. Th...	Iamhere	4	576	May 4, 2018 by Lyne
	Checking out dating (Preview) I have not been on this site for a bit, but I have been reading on line and attending meetings. I decided to go out and meet a new man and see if I can get back on track with my life. I met a man 2 months ago and he seemed like a really great guy. To good to be true. My head started spinning as what he said and did appea...	joker	5	711	May 4, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	Literature rec (Preview) hi all, I have not posted here in a very long time, and am due for an update... soon! I do visit and read almost daily, and I thank you for all the wisdom, dedication and compassion displayed here on a daily/hourly basis! I have two friends who have both recently lost their husbands due to alcohol-related...	oceanpine	3	581	May 3, 2018 by KennyFenderjazz
	howdy (Preview) there are many problems with friends and families and alcohol in my life, both parents, a sibling, friends, etc; thus i am a member of alanon. . i have had decades long problems with the dogma of this program. i am an agnostic, (an atheist, really, in the sense that i believe in no deities), and this isn't...	williamedward27	12	746	May 3, 2018 by Enigmatic
	Courage to Change May 2 (Preview) Today's reading in courage to change is about accepting the help of HP and Al-Anon friends instead of stubbornly holding on to problems ourselves. The author shared that they sometimes are fixated on a problem, they cannot hear the guidance HP is sending their way. When they let go of their need to co...	Skorpi	4	654	May 3, 2018 by Bo
	What a week... (Preview) Saturday - ABF suicidal. I go pick him up. SUnday - "tapering" - 10 beers Monday - he gets sent home from work for "not functioning" - he'd taken diazapam Tuesday - call from his mum, police have been involved as he was suicidal, took out a lot of money and disappeared Wednesday - He's in hospital and his mu...	MizzB	8	736	May 3, 2018 by Dutchy
	Sponsorship (Preview) How long does it usually take to find a sponsor? I would like to start step work and to my understanding, you can't start without one. I've been doing F2F meetings and I try going to different ones to meet new people. So far I really haven't met anyone that I've clicked with or thought "this is the one." ...	jess144	6	700	May 2, 2018 by jess144
	A strange afternoon (Preview) For the first time in 4 weeks I took the girls to see my recovering husband at his mums where he is still staying. As soon as I got out of the car I saw something was wrong. He had either been drinking or he'd had a few seizures/absences. My mother confirmed that he was sober, hadn't been drinking but that he'...	Dutchy	18	805	May 1, 2018 by Dutchy
	ODAT Reading 5-1-2018 (Preview) The ODAT reading for May first speaks about the Al-Anon and AA program being founded on a spiritual basis. The reading points out that both programs acknowledge our dependence on a power greater than ourselves and the thousands of Al-Anon and AA groups around the world have members of many faiths an...	hotrod	3	639	May 1, 2018 by Lyne
	So why is it a problem for me now? (Preview) Ugh. It seems like no matter how many Alanon meetings I go to or what I read I don't know the answer. And this question is something my problem drinker husband questions when the issue comes up. Why does his drinking bother me now? And I know that others say it doesn't matter if it bothers me it bothers...	Dancer66	7	711	Apr 30, 2018 by SerenityRUS
	Step 5 (Preview) Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Participate in your own recovery as well as the recovery of others, by being active on this board as we go through the 12 Steps of recovery together! Step five has been posted to the step work board please join in and share your thoughts. Here is the link http://stepwo...	hotrod	3	901	Apr 30, 2018 by Dutchy
	C2C, 4/30 (Preview) Stubborness: The writer discussed letting his faucet drip and over time it did extensive damage. It forced him to get help. With Alanon he learned he can handle things differently. Sharing in meetings and putting experience into words, has allowed him to no longer push problems aside. He can n...	Lyne	6	603	Apr 30, 2018 by Iamhere
	Detachment, enabling or compassion. (Preview) Yes, another thread, : ) So, my A gets bad sinus infections about every 6 weeks. Do I need to tell an ICU nurse that alcohol is hurting her immune system? No, I don't think so. So anyway, she was sick on Thursday. I asked her if she needed some NyQuil. We didn't have any so I offered to go get some for her. On the...	Dalbert	6	726	Apr 29, 2018 by Jerry F
	Off-Topic - Joel Osteen - Remove the Grave Clothes (Preview) Part of my weekly routine includes watching Joel on Sunday mornings. It often speaks to me and this morning was pulling me in big time. While the title is kind of strange, this episode lines up really well with our recovery I believe.... A brief summary from the video: It's easy to judge others, but un...	Iamhere	4	2423	Apr 29, 2018 by Iamhere
	Hope for Today Apr 29 (Preview) Good morning Everyone- Todays reading is about making amends. I can relate to the writers description of feeling that he/she were owed amends. The idea that we, who have lived life navigating the behavior of our As, should be the ones to make amends seemed backward somehow. In my great days of mart...	yanksfan51	4	617	Apr 29, 2018 by DavidG
	I need to hear some success stories with AHs. I know its a struggle but I need hope and suggestions (Preview) I am SO thankful for this site and for all of you and your support. This disease is so horrible and takes such a toll on relationships and families. I could really use hearing some shares of survival or success. Living with a AH who is in denial is so hard. How do you manage when the other person is so con...	Dancer66	18	1261	Apr 29, 2018 by Bo
	CTC 4-28-18 (Preview) The C 2C reading for April 28 speaks about entering the rooms of Al-Anon and discovering a bright new world. of understanding and supportive people. The reading suggests that we can join this group by uncovering the "Courage" to be honest about our inner thoughts and inner feelings. We are oft...	lookingup	10	720	Apr 29, 2018 by Iamhere
	We are not his priority (Preview) I felt so strong in the last weeks and as I read my thoughts about communication in couples counselling I just found myself crumbling. We ended last week on the fact that my and recovering husband don't communicate. It's quite clear that a lack of communication lies with my husband. I've always been a b...	Dutchy	32	921	Apr 29, 2018 by Dutchy
	Going crazy (Preview) Hello everyone, I am going absolutely crazy today. I have been in a funk and crying all day. I feel like my ABF is upset with me because of this. He drank last night and although I think I handled last night well, I did not handle this morning or today well at all. I have that overwhelming fear again... that...	Karebear	7	829	Apr 28, 2018 by madowl86
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.