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Newbie
(Preview)
Hi all,
I have just begun MY recovery and am learning a lot. Boy, let me tell you - reading your posts makes my mouth just drop wide open as that is MY life! I just wish for one moment, my A, DH, could be in my shoes to read what I am going through on a daily basis.
A little about me, I have been married for 14 mo...
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texsmama
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6
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274
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OMG! LOL
(Preview)
Hi All!!
Some of you will remember the past year and a half the battle I had with my daughter who was 16 and dating and "in love" with a 21 yr old on parole from prison. Then just this past December this same daughter who will be 18 this month moved out blaming me for all that trouble with that now 23 yr...
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irish54
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11
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421
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working the program
(Preview)
being relatively new to alanon, i am curious, what does "working the program" mean to you?
i would love to hear some of your answers.....
sharing all this ESH with you all has certainly worked wonders for me so far. i thank you for being here.
love,fifi
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Fifi
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3
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300
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2am-can't shut off brain-obsessing
(Preview)
God, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, Wisdom to know the difference.
God, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, Wisdom to know the difference.
God, Grant me the serenity to accept...
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CJ
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21
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3476
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ACCEPTABLE VS UNACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOR
(Preview)
Dear ((((Roomies))),
I just completed the exercise suggested by Tiger (in her response to Carolinagirl's post on detachment). I am not sure I did the exercise completely correctly as described, but I want to share what I did and my results.
I created two columns. In the first column I listed unac...
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BlueCloud
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4
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689
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so lonely
(Preview)
Hi to everyone,
I'm writing to just have contact with someone. I am so lonely, I can't seem to find my God today. My A. is here, but that is no help. I just want a little human or spirtual company.
Rita
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rita
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7
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301
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Another issue with my F2F meeting!!!! (LONG)
(Preview)
I went last night to my F2F meeting because it had been several weeks (holidays). When I got there it was obvious that it was the alateen meeting night, 1 a month is alateen. As most of you know I am TOTALLY alone here no friends no family. I have been having problems with my daughter's...
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carolinagirl
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11
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473
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Is it my problem or his? new here and confused....
(Preview)
As you can see, this is my first post..and I’m feeling anxious about it – perhaps fear of what might be said or what I must do (or not do). This is really long but I don’t know any other way to do this – and it’s a reflection of how I analyze everything. This is me- the long winded woman.
...
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DebiDeb
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8
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611
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A threat to me
(Preview)
Hello everyone,
It has been quite some time since I posted on here...The past six months have been horrible for me..I lost my mother in June , and had two more deaths in my family since then~ my aunt and my grandma, then was fired from my job in November...I have had a hell of a time dealing with ever...
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Diane43
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11
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591
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Anxiety treatment
(Preview)
Hello all,
I need advice - I'm suffering from anxiety, it generally is a physical shaking, jittering and unable to concentrate on anything but making it stop.
I used Ativan for a while but started getting "rebound" shakes when it was wearing off. My MD switched me to Xanax which worked nice...
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Orchid Lady
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14
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531
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1st f2f
(Preview)
Welp so I balled the WHOLE freaking hour, I think almost everyone after said something to me, gave me a hug....told me to call them if I needed!!!! I was even SO pathetic that someone bought me a book cause they said I REALLY needed it!!!! So aside from THAT!!!! It went well....I feel...
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Klynn
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2
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310
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So, I went to meet the director...
(Preview)
So I went to meet the director, and wow, the lady's brilliant. And she's very encouraging. She told me to be upfront with the comittee about my GPA. Just put it in my open letter to the comittee of admissions, she said. In that, discuss any "concerns:" Why transfer from a $35,000/ye...
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Tiger2006
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6
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360
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If pain is growth then this is one hell of a growth spurt
(Preview)
Hello all.
First, I would like to thank everyone for their kind words and shared experience which is giving me a glimmer of hope here. I am doing a lot of thinking and trying to figure it all out now. I have never been a patient person and I seem to think my higher power is trying to teach me this. If I could s...
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ColeShan
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3
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334
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still struggling
(Preview)
So I was on a meeting last night here and I found one tonight....I want to go but I dont!! I guess by going I am really admitting there is somthing terribly wrong. I am just scared that thing will change between us. I am having a hard time just surrendering to the idea that there is a prob...
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Klynn
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12
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512
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Every once in a while...
(Preview)
Higher Power puts a theme in your day and if you are lucky you get the message from the theme. With the holidays I have been a little lax on going to meetings and with puter at home being on the fritz I haven't made it to the board or the chat room in a while. Today we had electrical p...
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AlaMom
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2
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384
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newbie question along the same lines as others
(Preview)
This is my first real post but you've all be a tremendous support to me in the last few weeks just from my daily visits, thankyou. My AH was sober for 20 years, in that time I still worked my program and our marriage was okay not great. We have 2 kids with one being away in college now, the other in High school....
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tryingtoheal
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5
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461
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Just called child support enforcement.
(Preview)
Well, I filed for child support a month or two ago and had nowhere to have my AH served but now he is in a recovery house and working so I called them today and provided them with all the info. even did a little research to get the company info. It was Hard (emotionally of course)! As it is...
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carolinagirl
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4
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457
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we need each other---please read
(Preview)
I went out to shop this evening and I brought home Chineese food. I waited over 3 hours to open my fortune cookie, not that I am a fanatic.
Anyway,
here is what the fortune said:
"Including others in your life will bring you great happiness."
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hippietrippiechick
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2
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288
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Seizures caused by excessive drinking & lack of food. Dt's caused by continued drinking and lack of nourishment.
(Preview)
Does anyone else have experience with this?
This happened to my husband in November.
He seemed ok when he came home from the hospital.
Then, when he got off his meds he went nuts....psychosis.
Blames me for his drinking. Coming onto my daughter - he's been her dad since she was 12 -
and...
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lilliput
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2
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466
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Detaching with love????
(Preview)
I am having a hard time with the detaching with love thing. How do you detach and still have love? If I detach I need to be totally detached. I am having a hard time grasping this concept I guess I see love as doing/saying what he wants me to? I just can't hold on to "loving" and det...
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carolinagirl
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14
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703
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Request for prayers, please...
(Preview)
((((Everyone))))
I hate this disease, I just received this e-mail from a close friend. My heart is breaking -- you know divorce/separation doesn't separate us from the pain of this disease. My friend has been divorce from her AH for 4 yrs. She has been thru so much Hell, but she h...
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Lunamoth
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12
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487
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Apology to all Please read
(Preview)
I know that I have been just posting chaotic stuff going with me and my A, this is where I am at right now. I hope that it doesn't offend anyone. You have the power to delete the message when you see mine come in, but I hope you all care for me more than that.
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hippietrippiechick
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7
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570
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New to this, thought the tough times were behind me
(Preview)
This is my first time posting, I find this very difficult, but I need to express my thoughts, and currently I have no outlet. I am not sure what things are ok to say, so I will just explain my situation and hopefully someone will be able to relate.
My girlfriend of over three years is an A.&n...
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8strong
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9
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443
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Can't get into chat
(Preview)
Anyone else having problems getting into the chat room? Tried and tried and nothing lets me in! Hubby has tried to fix it from our end, and nothing seems to be working. Oh great ops in the sky, help me please!
Live strong,
Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
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Karilynn
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6
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359
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O/T-anxiety
(Preview)
I have shared before about my DIL coming here every day for lunch. It is now going on 3 months and I am having lots of anxiety about it. On Friday I was just waiting for the "Big Blow" afraid I might say something I would regret. She came 25 minutes late with a bouquet of flowers for watching the...
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meagain
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2
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239
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Criticism
(Preview)
This weekend I was dressed down for something that I'm not sure was all mine.
I have always told people that if I have done something wrong or offended someone to tell me for I cannot fix it unless I know what it is. What I learned is that I cannot handle criticism of any kind. There is no fix f...
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Mobirdie
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7
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394
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So, tomorrow I go to meet the director...
(Preview)
So, tomorrow I go to meet the director of the program for International and Comparitive Politics.
Right now, quite frankly, I'm too tired to be scared. But I will be tomorrow. Or, if nothing else, at 9am she could say "And, as a part of this program we require your immortal soul..." And I...
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Tiger2006
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8
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364
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Having a Rough Day
(Preview)
Hi all! So, here it is Monday and I am having a rough time of it. I had a fairly good weekend as I went to a meeting with my partner and then out to eat. I had to push my partner, but finally got her out and had a good time with some other people. Sat. night we had another couple over who we are trying to get to know th...
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ColeShan
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3
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355
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Being true to me????
(Preview)
I am in a place and i do not know how to deal with it. For those of you that know me you know all i did last year with court and mothers death, and bullying with school, bullying has continued on into this year with more extreme abuse. Including sexual with my daughters friend telling her how to sexually abus...
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kerry5
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6
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455
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watching myself
(Preview)
hi
another interesting moment for me and being aware of myself and ways i am trying to be different.
so i am trying to focus on my own feelings, right? know what i want,what i feel, be responsible for myself...and only myself. this is hard for me as a newly identified co-dependant (tho if can brist...
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Fifi
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1
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257
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back to reality
(Preview)
I had a great holiday with my sons. Two home from college and my soldier home on leave. They are amazing people. I have felt so full of love for 3 weeks. Someone in the house, someone to help with the chores, someone to hug. I talked to them about their father and me and our separation. I think it bothers them...
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nmike
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1
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231
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equal but opposite needs--who trumps
(Preview)
Someone told me to start a new thread on this question so here goes.
I have a question for everyone. This was a fatal question I asked 2 years ago when he left me for the 5th time and we were reconciling and going to meetings. I paid for this for 2 weeks afterward as my question was take...
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snoopy
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16
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548
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hey guys
(Preview)
Hi guys,
Sorry it has been so long. Everything has been wonderful Chuck has been clean sober. Amanda is great & we are very happy. My whole family celebrated all the holidays together. We havent done that since my mom passed away 4 years ago . i really miss...
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chrissy
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4
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379
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boundries....again
(Preview)
i have gained 30 pounds since september. that is when my ex ah got sober(again) and started hanging out here with the kids (whom he had abandonded in march). he also has bipolar disorder which is currently unmedicated and is in a "remission" of sorts. yeah, back to me. well, it seems that i am in a pretty b...
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serendipity
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4
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360
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:o/
(Preview)
I am holding up at home and at work but in the car is HELL!! I hide my tears at home so our child wont know I'm hurting, and of course I hide it at work, but when I am alone in the car driving to work the tears fall!! Yeah a not so good time to be crying!!!! *rolling eyes* I do cry at home after our child...
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Klynn
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1
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240
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Patterns of behavior
(Preview)
Hello my friends,
I have much to learn here....I have been using this site since Labor Day last year, but since I also started school (in an attempt to focus on myself,) I have trouble staying with the program... Until I get myself into trouble again! Anyway, I am sooo grateful to be able...
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DeeDee
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5
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385
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Well, I may have just broke the straw........
(Preview)
I guess I may have, by my reactions last night with his sister, and since we are in an interraional relationship. I said the wrong thing. I said, "my family does not act so irrational" I yelled at him today to get hm to understand that he was really just brougt up by a wife-beating alcoholic. I said since my...
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hippietrippiechick
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2
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253
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Who's the Birthday Girl!!!?????
(Preview)
Ahem......I'm not supposed to say but........oh well!!!!
Maria123 is having her birthday today!!!
Woooohoooo!!!!!!!!!!
Happy Birthday my friend!!!
Hope you have a wonderful day!!!!
Love ya!
David
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david62
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29
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973
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It is getting old..
(Preview)
This has been the worst year I can imagine. After being sober for 8 years my husband starting drinking again, as of today, has gone to detox this year 6 times on his own. I am getting so tired of the rambling about what a*holes. (and that is being polite), (I am an ugly c**t becau...
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Davids wife
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9
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499
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how do i think of me
(Preview)
i have the same problem,thinking of what the other person is not doing marty will,i also had had where i never measure up to my dad and it did not matter ,what i did,it was not good enought,but my dad been gone sence 84.i thought i tell you so you can get some back round on me and were i am coming from,it the sam...
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marty
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1
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321
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I feel unworthy a lot
(Preview)
Many times I feel unworthy, I see an attractive man and think he wouldn't want me, why would he want me, etc. I keep thinking if I change this or that then I will meet or attract the right person, the person I really want to be with. Sometimes I see this as ridiculous but most of the time I think i...
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carolinagirl
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10
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571
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what i learned
(Preview)
I am working on Step Six. Well working on the step I was working on not calling my husband all the time. Then I did some research and found that I have Attachment Disorder. Which means that I have had this problem since I was a little kid. I have realize that when I was dealing with my husband and he would take...
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nycbt
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2
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226
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Red flags
(Preview)
Hello (((((((((Alanuts))))))))) First of all.....a belated Happy new Year to you all. I don't get to post often these days since it's so difficut for me to get to the internet,but when I do I avidly read as many posts as I can. A friend in Uk got me some Alanon literature and I managed to get a copy of Courag...
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chris52
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16
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495
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The stronger I get, the worse my A gets
(Preview)
The more I go to meetings or go out to enjoy myself, I have come home to my A husband much worse than before I went. This has been going on for a couple of months now. I am having a lot of stress becuase my mother may be dying, my father is also very sick and griefstricken. It seems my...
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carol
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11
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526
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A POem...
(Preview)
I am the Lucky Girl to have you both….
I just wanted to say
How thankful I am for you each day
I may not tell you how much I love you, or how much I really care
Let me tell you the love has always been there
You both are my all
The ones who picked me up every time I would fall
Where would I be w...
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Lauren ashley
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8
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300
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i am not happy with myself
(Preview)
i feel like my head is going to blow off.
HE IS EVERYWHERE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
if i go down into another room he is there,
come back upstairs, he is there.
tried to explalin i don't feel well , would just like to lay down and QUIETLY watch tv.
HE IS THERE !!!!!!
oh, he has no problem wit...
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jewely
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8
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392
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Made a decision about all the crap that happened last night....
(Preview)
I am calling Verizon (local telephone comp.) and having both his sister and niece's numbers blocked from calling on my phone.
I am already having a hrd time getttng out, now I don't know. I know she will be looking for me. What do I keep in my purse to protect myslef. Anyone know how expesive mace or pepp...
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hippietrippiechick
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0
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234
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Hello again...
(Preview)
post removed -- Edited by cullyvan at 10:27, 2007-01-08
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cullyvan
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0
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198
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What is manipulative behavior?
(Preview)
I'm very confused about this. I'm very direct in that I state what I think and feel, so I am very lost. I keep hearing that those in Alanon are manipulative. Another member shared that when she was little she would give her mother evil looks to get what she wanted. She said this was controlling behavior. S...
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kissers
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13
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4093
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Old Time Al-Anon Snow bird
(Preview)
I have been attending Al-Anon since 1991.due to my son's drinking and my ex-husband's
drinking. I had a bad attitude and a loose mouth the criticizum and sarcasm that came
out of my mouth was awfull. I never thought before I spoke I've learned to do that in
Al-Anon. I've also learne...
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Jeanie
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2
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307
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Today went well
(Preview)
So I am taking one day at a time....Hubby and I talked today, I told him some of my fears and worries, although I really did not want to....I want him to focus on him not me. But I cant keep much from him so I buckled....I felt better afterwards!! He talked some too, I realized that we are both in...
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Klynn
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2
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242
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haven't posted for a while, however......
(Preview)
I guess I haven't had a very good day. I have been in a lot of physidal pain, and my A has some kind of flu==I really don't want to mess with hism a lot since I was just in the hosp. for pneumonia right after Thanksgiving.
I have realized I myself can just have the bitchiest attitutde around my A, even...
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hippietrippiechick
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2
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316
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reaction
(Preview)
hi all
so my weekend visit to A in rehab went well...i had 8 hours of aa life...talked with a lot of A's, and their loved ones. attended my first aa meeting - heard the stories that we all know - so moving, so hopeful, so much reliance on HP. he and i had good talks....open communication - what our needs,...
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Fifi
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2
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255
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Anger & shame are eating me up
(Preview)
My A is in the hospital for the 5th time in 2 months because of his drinking. He was very, very sick & escaped a heart attack again but he's getting close to no-escape. At home I can detach, & deal with my A husband when he tries to cause an argument, manipulate me etc.&n...
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carol
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3
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551
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Treatment/Medications
(Preview)
Hi- I'm new to the site and have never done this. My A is in treatment for a relapse after 14 months sober. The Dr. at the center is thinking of putting him on a RX for cravings. I'm not sure if it will work but my A is hopeful. I guess anything is worth a try.
I'd be in...
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kkw
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1
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246
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Another birthday girl!
(Preview)
(((((((((((Family))))))))))),
We have another birthday girl today. Shh.....don't tell anyone but it's our
GARDENGAL!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET
GARDENGAL!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
May it be extra spec...
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Karilynn
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12
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437
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A lot can happen in a week
(Preview)
My ex-A who I refused to have for Christmas had to be hospitalised on new year's eve for high blood pressure. He is staying with me and is now watching tv. That might not sound so strange only it is ten years since he has staying away from the pub and watched television in a family environment. Unfortunate...
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maire rua
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2
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247
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New member needs help.
(Preview)
I have been with my husband for 20 years and he has been an alcoholic all of this time.
It has been livable but not an enjoyable life.
He recently became steadily weaker, had loss of muscle mass, loss of appetite and weight.
He then suffered two seizures.
My daughter who knows how t...
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lilliput
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2
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287
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A Gift For All of You
(Preview)
http://www.lightmovie.com/
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kissers
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2
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238
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Taking a break from the board
(Preview)
(((((Everyone))))))
I'm taking a little break from the board. Things here are a bit unmanagable and I need to focus on taking care of a few things.
I thank you all for the prayers for my friend. Her Ex-Ah has been sent home, because that is where he wants to be. He's been given abo...
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Lunamoth
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9
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474
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