Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Dear Friends, Sorry I have been so absent of late, life has been a roller coaster ride as of late... In a great way most of the time... I found a new job, love it secretarial again...my thing...crazy hours...but much fun.. Have a new wonderful man in my life...he is just awesome..self employed,...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Just read a story in the education section of the NY Times, about young ladies today graduating high school and the pressures they face to get into college. I didn't realize how hard the story hit me till I finished it. All of the sudden, waves of feeling "less than," "not enough,&quo...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

Oh boy, where do I start.....I have been taking pain meds for over a year. Vicodin ES to be exact. Ever since I had my son and thirteen months later gave birth to my twins, my back has hurt really bad to the point that it can make me sick to my stomach. So I do have legitimate pain. Here's my concern......One v...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

"I think little Sarah is still waiting for Daddy to come home. It would be wise for you to realize the fact that he's never coming home. He's already home. This is him." The immortal words of my councelor in session yesterday, which hit hard on my morning 10th step. And oh, how the words pour...

serendipity · serendipity

I am getting better. My mother came over yesterday to watch the kids while I work. She's great about stepping in when my ex decides to step out. Well, not great but she does it, complaining all the while and not putting them to bed at any reasonable hour and feeding them only turkey bacon and noodles and bu...

gknee · gknee

I haven't been on this board for a while-- but as I sat here this AM telling my H that I don't think I want to do this marriage thing anymore if he can't see that he is an addict---- I realized this is exactly where I need to be. The problem for me is that my A is really a marijuana addict (daily) who sup...

carolena · carolena

Hi everyone, I've been trying and trying to put a message on here and can't seem to do it. I'm in a lot of pain with letting go of my daughters and granddaughter. When I try to post, I find myself not able to express what I'm going through without writing a book, so I'm writing about breaking the cyc...

bev · bev

hi everyone,sorry i havent posted in awhile but as you all know i left my AH AND MOVED FROM FLORIDA BACK TO NY..but im doing good..AH is in rehab in florida and doing very well..he is going to church and doing meetings,and doing what he has to do.where he is they have a 3 step program..the first step is like...

Leetle · Leetle

Well, I have told my A that when he is released from jail he cannot come home. Leading up to that conversation I had a lot of anxiety. Working out my plans with those I trust. Initially I worried horribly about my ability to keep the boundaries I was setting and even moreso about the consequences (he ca...

angel123 · angel123

These are from our Forum,Refreshing to me to read each day hope you enjoy as well Love Sharon/angel

QOD · QOD

Thanks to all for the sharing. My AH came over for dinner tonight. TACOS. He came right in and hugged me & snuck a kiss in on me. Then he laughed at how he did that. BLAH. So I was in the middle of making dinner when my cell phone rang. He was standing right by it and saw a guy's name come up. A guy from t...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

"If you can't feel loved, settle for being needed" I just read that in Codependant no More. It spoke out a little to me. I remember, not too far into my marriage, wanting to soak up love like a sponge, and just not FEELING it. So I became a little desperate for him to feel pleased with me. I looked...

maresie2 · maresie2

Why is that now I am contemplating life on my own I feel tremendous fear. I lived quite ok on my own for years before I met the A. I now think I am not capable of it. I have been trying to fashion another fail safe plan. I do not want to be stuck living with the A. He is moving to some remote area. Everything in his l...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((((Family))))), Tomorrow is my beloved Pipers Kitty 4th birthday. It is also my 3rd anniversary with hubby. When I think back where we were a year ago, I am stunned by the changes in me and in my life. I was incredibly unhappy and sad because he was still drinking and I thought it would never end....

angel123 · angel123

This is from the forum...Hope it works love angel

Phil · Phil

The ability to allow people, places, or things the freedom to be themselves. Holding back from the need to rescue, save, or fix another person from being sick, dysfunctional, or irrational. Giving another person "the space'' to be him or herself. Disengaging from an over-enmeshed or depende...

rtexas · rtexas

Hello ((((((Everyone)))))) My new found skill in sticking to my boundries has been tested to the bitter end over the past few weeks. For those that don't know, my AW and I are seperated and have been for 5 months now. She has learned to talk the talk of getting better (getting help and getting sober), b...

doxie · doxie

As I continue to work out my recovery in my way and my time there are some things that bother me more than others, so those are the things that I pray on(cause that is what I do....:) I am really working on my attitude with my AH, that is something that really drives me nuts, not to mention it drives him nuts al...

gimmpy · gimmpy

I find myself hoping that my 19 year old isn't at home when I return from work etc. I am so tired, her and her friends are very disrespectful. I have told her no drugs and drinking in this house, both myself and husband are in recovery and we have other children as well. And it continues, she even puts empty...

QOD · QOD

My AH doesn't seem to want to let go of our relationship. I told him a week ago that it was over. That I didn't see us getting back together. That I still love him but it isn't the same.He seems to grasp this concept for a few days and then WHAM, right back to the same ol' crap. He loves me, misses me, so lone...

angel123 · angel123

This is From the Forum 1989,hope you are enjoying the pages posted.love Angel

thinkstoomuch · thinkstoomuch

Literature coodinators have received word that WSO is still looking for shares for the next book-in-progress, whose working title is "Recovery in Relationships". CAL literature (and in fact our whole Alanon program) depend on members sharing their own experience, strength and hope...

serendipity · serendipity

i made the boundry that my ex ah could not see or have any contact with me or the kids. if he wants to see them i need something legal. he has called a few times and i don't say anything just "get a lawyer". it was hard for me but it got easier. yesterday he called and asked to speak to the kids and i sai...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Well, now that my A has not been living w/ me, it has gotten worse, but in a different way. I say I do not miss the nightly chaos that can spring up at a drunken moment, or when I have had enough, not taking my meds right and flipping out. I think him even being here aggravates my mental illness. For one, I have f...

albertarose · albertarose

Last week I was full of sorrow about my AH and I splitting up and possibly heading to the divorce courts. This past weekend I spent the entire weekend with him and he has told me that after his two binges ober tyhe past two or three weeks he has realized that he is not happy and he wants a better life. /he said t...

david62 · david62

Hi (((((Family))))) I got the following in an email and thought it had a beautiful message so decided to share it with you. (Have the kleenex ready, I needed it!) A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside of her patient. "Your son is here," she said to the old man. She had to rep...

DanieH · DanieH

Yesterday was exactly 1 week that AH has been clean. I know you have to take one day at a time, but Im sooo proud of him. He was suppose to go to a meeting w/ his cousin friday night, but his cousin got home late, so the 3 of us went food shopping instead. Of course, we had to drive through the college area, so a bu...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((Family)))))))), Just wanted to wish all of you who celebrate Passover this week, a blessed and joyous Passover. I have been honored to observe it and participate in it with dear friends, and it truly is wonderful. Love and blessings to you and your families. Live strong, Karilynn & Pi...

Miranda · Miranda

One of my closest guy friends, Eric, shot himself last night. There were no signs... I haven't even really had a chance to talk to him since I left school months ago...Every once in a while, we'd talk on the phone, and he even came to visit the kids after the twins were born. He never led on any indication th...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

I posted earlier about how it sucked that I was working nights while A hung out and worked on his beer belly. A few people replied that I need to hold my priorities; take care of me, my family, and my home. I appreciate this and it is a good way to keep things in perspective. I switched my scheduling. I work...

maresie2 · maresie2

I have just been gone a few days and come back to get a few more things. The house is a real mess. The A immediately steps in with what I have contributed to the mess as soon as I get in the door. The electricity is going to be cut off. He just lays around and watches the few channels he can get on TV. His favori...

lonelymom · lonelymom

Hi I just found this board and read some. I felt after reading some posts that so many people would understand what I was going through and right now I feel like nobody does. He has been drinking for the last 2 years, it has gotten worse and worse. He blames me for EVERYTHING, it's always my fault, he's neve...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((((((((yo roomies))))))))))))))))))))))) WOW!!!! I feel as if I have been on a journey the last few weeks. I have grown so much in my life...Also I have grown up...lol Well, my anti-deps are working, I'm accepting I am just like everyone else "Normal"..... I...

Jayda · Jayda

I'm feeling like things are pretty hopeless right now. Like I said last month, my husband left me, found out he's been talking to another woman....just talking he says and says he has stopped talking to her and that he will not have any contact with her again. But he still doesn't want to get back togethe...

donewithitallandhappy · donewithitallandhappy

I am continuing to rebuild a much happier life- moved into a new house, my job is going great, and I just keep getting better news about my health. Got the phone call from my mom that I knew would come soon. I made the decision to NOT talk to my mom about my sister's family's problems because I was burned year...

sash · sash

As you may know, my husband got out of detox on Thurs. He's been to at least one meeting a day since he left (Fri. he went to two). Last night he suggested that we attend this couples meeting. I didn't know what to expect because this is all so new for me. Basically, it is a meeting of mostly AA members and...

artgirl · artgirl

I am in a step study group and am responsible for going over Tradition 9. Can any of you very wise people give me some insite on how Tradition 9 can be applied to the Alanon program and to everyday life. By the way the 9th tradition is "Our groups ought never be organized; but we may create service b...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone))))) Phil posted the other day about people pleasing and how to learn to say no. I have 2 major defects, people pleasing and the consequenses of saying yes when you mean no. And for a long long time, I considered that I had no choices about how my life went. Well, the 2 really go together. ...

afmom03 · afmom03

Hello Everyone!! It's been a long time since I've been here and I sure have missed the MIP board! My 90 day anniversary of leaving the AH is just a couple of days away now, and things are finally moving in the right direction for me. It hasn't been easy by a long shot......

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

I'm sitting here at 10:00 on a Saturday night still in my pajamas from this morning. I have been fighting depression all day. I go from sitting on the pitty pot to beating myself up for not seeing through the A and his manipulation. I've been through this so many times. Doing the same thing over and ov...

doxie · doxie

Oh I am so sick of this behavior that never changes. Both his AH and mine. AH is a dry drunk, I honestly think it was easier when he drank, then there was something to blame his stupid selfish behavior on, now it is easy to think it is my fault. But I won't go that route again, cause it isn't me, I am better than t...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

My guess is pretty darn long. My A has been drunk every night for I don't know how long now. The worst was the night before last. He picked me up from work and even though he was driving "OK" I could tell he had a good buzz going by the way he rudely interrupted me and talked non stop. I do not believe...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Well, My A and I were supposed to get together, here, at my place to be together on his day off. I called a few times this AM, but got no answer. I was not feeling up to par, so I went back to sleep. Noonish, I checked my phone and he left a rage-ful, alcohol-full mean message. I did call back. I said to him he didn...

gardengal · gardengal

Oh man in the beginning of Alanon I did whatever it took, begging, crying, pleading, "making deals" so that I would get my way. It was especially hard for me to ASK for help around the house and all its chores it involves...so I would slam dishes around in the sink,,so the A would hear,,,,as h...

kerry5 · kerry5

The business Meeting that is schedule for tonight at 9pm est has been canceled. We have no agenda therefore no issues this month. Which isnt a bad thing in my opinion

Next business meeting is Scheduled for May the 5th 2007 My term is up as business chair this month so Maria123 will start as your ne...

lin0606 · lin0606

I made a mistake at work a couple of days ago that could have had serious consequences. Stupidity, carelessness "I'm in a hurry I'm sure it's fine" - it wasn't fine. Now, a few days on, it looks like the fallout will be minimal - none of the really bad consequences happened. However, I've ha...

debilyn · debilyn

I know this is going to sound strange, but would you post this to the board asking for prayers. I'm just to sad to. Nicholas was my best friend's son. All my friend keeps asking for is prayers. Thank you. http://www.wcnc.com/news/topstories/stories/wcnc-032607-krg-logging_fatal.309e40b...

melamom815 · melamom815

I got an email from my husband last night. (That is kind of a weird thing to say lol) Anyway, he and a friend of ours have been emailing each other back and forth about her husband. Her husband is also an A. She and I have basically the same story when it comes to our A husbands. I see alot of my old self in h...

DanieH · DanieH

AH called his sponser last night. His assignment is he needs to call him everyday for 30 days. Ughwere dreading this phone bill b/c this guy loves to talk. Each phone call has lasted an hour or more! His darn boss never picked him up for work this morning. AH called his recovering cousin and told him b...

serendipity · serendipity

I am feeling alot better. Tuesday was the last time I lost it and called my ex ah. I saw that there was a "trigger" that happened that made me feel the need to call him and be abused. So, when the triggers came up I prayed. Please take him, I am not in control, your will not mine, this situation is n...

maresie2 · maresie2

I know one reason that I put off this transition for so so long is that I knew it would be painful. I also knew I would resent the a even more. I know absolutely these days I cannot live with his self destructive, totally disrespectful, unloving behavior anymore. I am sick of being last on the list. I am al...

sash · sash

My husband got out today. I have decided to be cautiously optimistic. I see everyone's replies where they tell me to work on me and get myself well. honestly, it never even occurred to me that there was anything with me. In my case, I just couldn't take his crap anymore and I basically told him that if he d...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

My house is up for bids at the courthouse, we borrowed the money from my FIL and went down and paid that foreclosure. But it didn't stop the vulchers from parking in front of my house taking pictures so they can pounce on it if it did go on the market. Mind you, I have children. So then we came up with the idea t...

Katy · Katy

Ok I been married and living with an active alchoholic for oh years before I ever knew about Alanon, so to this day I'm as crazy and as warped thinking as a person can get in those circumstances. Yep I done it all, I banked every wrong that he done to me with credit, and it would all spwe out of me time after tim...

HadEnuff · HadEnuff

Hi Everyone, I haven't written for a while and a lot has happened and nothing has changed. He admits only to me, that he's an alcoholic. He knows that it's not good for him. He does know that he's done and said things that have been extremely hurtful. He talks about quitting all the time, but o...

DanieH · DanieH

Last night, I was driving my AH to his meeting. I noticed he took his NA book. He mentioned they read from there...I thought that was strange. I thought he was going to AA meetings...no...its NA meetings. He said in AA meetings they dont want to hear about drugs at all..or at least thats what hes been t...

Phil · Phil

by Kali Munro, M.Ed., Psychotherapist, 2001(originally published at BodyTalk Magazine.com, Aug. 2001) Do you have trouble saying NO? Do you do things for other people but almost never ask anybody to do things for you? You may be a people pleaser. People pleasers think of other peoples needs before...

Reece · Reece

Okay ladies and gents...This is my first time here. My name is Teresa. I'm a 27 year old Michiganian married to an alcoholic who is in total denial of his disease and becoming increasingly depressed, angry, and emotionally abusive. Here's the long story about how I ended up here: Sunday night I we...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

But at least I tried!

Rita G · Rita G

Yes, my dear friends, Today again, I am still powerless over people, places, things and situations. That beautiful eldest daughter. Let's call her AG. AG was arrested. She was already on probation, now a possible federal offense. We, her family, refused to bail her out. Her abusive boyfriend...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Miss you all (Preview) Hello Dear Friends, Sorry I have been so absent of late, life has been a roller coaster ride as of late... In a great way most of the time... I found a new job, love it secretarial again...my thing...crazy hours...but much fun.. Have a new wonderful man in my life...he is just awesome..self employed,...	Andrea12	13	788	Apr 5, 2007 by Diva
	anyone else here face insecurity? daily? momentarily? anyone? (Preview) Just read a story in the education section of the NY Times, about young ladies today graduating high school and the pressures they face to get into college. I didn't realize how hard the story hit me till I finished it. All of the sudden, waves of feeling "less than," "not enough,&quo...	Tiger2006	8	1219	Apr 5, 2007 by Sunny2007
	I'm adding fuel to my own fire. (Preview) Oh boy, where do I start.....I have been taking pain meds for over a year. Vicodin ES to be exact. Ever since I had my son and thirteen months later gave birth to my twins, my back has hurt really bad to the point that it can make me sick to my stomach. So I do have legitimate pain. Here's my concern......One v...	Friendofyours	4	652	Apr 5, 2007 by abbyal
	The denial fog lifts. Again. (Preview) "I think little Sarah is still waiting for Daddy to come home. It would be wise for you to realize the fact that he's never coming home. He's already home. This is him." The immortal words of my councelor in session yesterday, which hit hard on my morning 10th step. And oh, how the words pour...	Tiger2006	4	714	Apr 4, 2007 by nmike
	my mother (Preview) I am getting better. My mother came over yesterday to watch the kids while I work. She's great about stepping in when my ex decides to step out. Well, not great but she does it, complaining all the while and not putting them to bed at any reasonable hour and feeding them only turkey bacon and noodles and bu...	serendipity	5	687	Apr 4, 2007 by Lunamoth
	why alanon is hard for me (Preview) I haven't been on this board for a while-- but as I sat here this AM telling my H that I don't think I want to do this marriage thing anymore if he can't see that he is an addict---- I realized this is exactly where I need to be. The problem for me is that my A is really a marijuana addict (daily) who sup...	gknee	6	1375	Apr 4, 2007 by gknee
	Breaking the Cycle, letting go, painful (Preview) Hi everyone, I've been trying and trying to put a message on here and can't seem to do it. I'm in a lot of pain with letting go of my daughters and granddaughter. When I try to post, I find myself not able to express what I'm going through without writing a book, so I'm writing about breaking the cyc...	carolena	4	712	Apr 4, 2007 by carolena
	life goes on (Preview) hi everyone,sorry i havent posted in awhile but as you all know i left my AH AND MOVED FROM FLORIDA BACK TO NY..but im doing good..AH is in rehab in florida and doing very well..he is going to church and doing meetings,and doing what he has to do.where he is they have a 3 step program..the first step is like...	bev	4	620	Apr 4, 2007 by Maria123
	Painful Progress (Preview) Well, I have told my A that when he is released from jail he cannot come home. Leading up to that conversation I had a lot of anxiety. Working out my plans with those I trust. Initially I worried horribly about my ability to keep the boundaries I was setting and even moreso about the consequences (he ca...	Leetle	7	762	Apr 4, 2007 by Maria123
	Step 2 and Each new Day (Preview) These are from our Forum,Refreshing to me to read each day hope you enjoy as well Love Sharon/angel	angel123	1	466	Apr 4, 2007 by Sunny2007
	My AH won't let go - UPDATE! (Preview) Thanks to all for the sharing. My AH came over for dinner tonight. TACOS. He came right in and hugged me & snuck a kiss in on me. Then he laughed at how he did that. BLAH. So I was in the middle of making dinner when my cell phone rang. He was standing right by it and saw a guy's name come up. A guy from t...	QOD	7	703	Apr 4, 2007 by DanieH
	settling (Preview) "If you can't feel loved, settle for being needed" I just read that in Codependant no More. It spoke out a little to me. I remember, not too far into my marriage, wanting to soak up love like a sponge, and just not FEELING it. So I became a little desperate for him to feel pleased with me. I looked...	RainyJamie	4	466	Apr 4, 2007 by ally
	fear fear fear (Preview) Why is that now I am contemplating life on my own I feel tremendous fear. I lived quite ok on my own for years before I met the A. I now think I am not capable of it. I have been trying to fashion another fail safe plan. I do not want to be stuck living with the A. He is moving to some remote area. Everything in his l...	maresie2	8	711	Apr 4, 2007 by TLC2
	An extra special Pipers Kitty Day (Preview) ((((((((Family))))), Tomorrow is my beloved Pipers Kitty 4th birthday. It is also my 3rd anniversary with hubby. When I think back where we were a year ago, I am stunned by the changes in me and in my life. I was incredibly unhappy and sad because he was still drinking and I thought it would never end....	Karilynn	11	983	Apr 4, 2007 by aunitedway
	THINK (Preview) This is from the forum...Hope it works love angel	angel123	5	554	Apr 4, 2007 by aunitedway
	Another Article Share..re...Detatchment (Preview) The ability to allow people, places, or things the freedom to be themselves. Holding back from the need to rescue, save, or fix another person from being sick, dysfunctional, or irrational. Giving another person "the space'' to be him or herself. Disengaging from an over-enmeshed or depende...	Phil	6	813	Apr 4, 2007 by Rita G
	New lease.... (Preview) Hello ((((((Everyone)))))) My new found skill in sticking to my boundries has been tested to the bitter end over the past few weeks. For those that don't know, my AW and I are seperated and have been for 5 months now. She has learned to talk the talk of getting better (getting help and getting sober), b...	rtexas	8	665	Apr 4, 2007 by twinmom2
	Working out my recovery in my own way (Preview) As I continue to work out my recovery in my way and my time there are some things that bother me more than others, so those are the things that I pray on(cause that is what I do....:) I am really working on my attitude with my AH, that is something that really drives me nuts, not to mention it drives him nuts al...	doxie	3	699	Apr 4, 2007 by mel123
	feeling bad about how I'm feeling (Preview) I find myself hoping that my 19 year old isn't at home when I return from work etc. I am so tired, her and her friends are very disrespectful. I have told her no drugs and drinking in this house, both myself and husband are in recovery and we have other children as well. And it continues, she even puts empty...	gimmpy	6	673	Apr 4, 2007 by Hopeless in AZ
	My AH won't let go! (Preview) My AH doesn't seem to want to let go of our relationship. I told him a week ago that it was over. That I didn't see us getting back together. That I still love him but it isn't the same.He seems to grasp this concept for a few days and then WHAM, right back to the same ol' crap. He loves me, misses me, so lone...	QOD	10	758	Apr 3, 2007 by serendipity
	Step 1 (Preview) This is From the Forum 1989,hope you are enjoying the pages posted.love Angel	angel123	4	637	Apr 3, 2007 by angel123
	"RECOVERY IN RELATIONSHIPS" -be part of next CAL book (Preview) Literature coodinators have received word that WSO is still looking for shares for the next book-in-progress, whose working title is "Recovery in Relationships". CAL literature (and in fact our whole Alanon program) depend on members sharing their own experience, strength and hope...	thinkstoomuch	0	444	Apr 3, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	boundry (Preview) i made the boundry that my ex ah could not see or have any contact with me or the kids. if he wants to see them i need something legal. he has called a few times and i don't say anything just "get a lawyer". it was hard for me but it got easier. yesterday he called and asked to speak to the kids and i sai...	serendipity	2	502	Apr 3, 2007 by Rita G
	NEED TO GIVE MY A AN ULTIMAUM--NEED SOME ESH PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Preview) Well, now that my A has not been living w/ me, it has gotten worse, but in a different way. I say I do not miss the nightly chaos that can spring up at a drunken moment, or when I have had enough, not taking my meds right and flipping out. I think him even being here aggravates my mental illness. For one, I have f...	hippietrippiechick	14	893	Apr 3, 2007 by Friendofyours
	What a Turnaround (Preview) Last week I was full of sorrow about my AH and I splitting up and possibly heading to the divorce courts. This past weekend I spent the entire weekend with him and he has told me that after his two binges ober tyhe past two or three weeks he has realized that he is not happy and he wants a better life. /he said t...	albertarose	5	660	Apr 3, 2007 by DanieH
	Just Being There (Preview) Hi (((((Family))))) I got the following in an email and thought it had a beautiful message so decided to share it with you. (Have the kleenex ready, I needed it!) A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside of her patient. "Your son is here," she said to the old man. She had to rep...	david62	10	689	Apr 2, 2007 by MaggiG
	1 week (Preview) Yesterday was exactly 1 week that AH has been clean. I know you have to take one day at a time, but Im sooo proud of him. He was suppose to go to a meeting w/ his cousin friday night, but his cousin got home late, so the 3 of us went food shopping instead. Of course, we had to drive through the college area, so a bu...	DanieH	8	575	Apr 2, 2007 by albertarose
	Passover (Preview) (((((((((Family)))))))), Just wanted to wish all of you who celebrate Passover this week, a blessed and joyous Passover. I have been honored to observe it and participate in it with dear friends, and it truly is wonderful. Love and blessings to you and your families. Live strong, Karilynn & Pi...	Karilynn	4	473	Apr 2, 2007 by Leetle
	My friend shot himself last night... (Preview) One of my closest guy friends, Eric, shot himself last night. There were no signs... I haven't even really had a chance to talk to him since I left school months ago...Every once in a while, we'd talk on the phone, and he even came to visit the kids after the twins were born. He never led on any indication th...	Miranda	15	932	Apr 2, 2007 by TLC2
	making a change (Preview) I posted earlier about how it sucked that I was working nights while A hung out and worked on his beer belly. A few people replied that I need to hold my priorities; take care of me, my family, and my home. I appreciate this and it is a good way to keep things in perspective. I switched my scheduling. I work...	RainyJamie	1	450	Apr 2, 2007 by Barbs45
	being out of the way of the A (Preview) I have just been gone a few days and come back to get a few more things. The house is a real mess. The A immediately steps in with what I have contributed to the mess as soon as I get in the door. The electricity is going to be cut off. He just lays around and watches the few channels he can get on TV. His favori...	maresie2	9	620	Apr 2, 2007 by megan
	new here...feel so alone (Preview) Hi I just found this board and read some. I felt after reading some posts that so many people would understand what I was going through and right now I feel like nobody does. He has been drinking for the last 2 years, it has gotten worse and worse. He blames me for EVERYTHING, it's always my fault, he's neve...	lonelymom	9	739	Apr 2, 2007 by gardengal
	WATCH HOW I'M GROWING (Preview) (((((((((((((((((((((yo roomies))))))))))))))))))))))) WOW!!!! I feel as if I have been on a journey the last few weeks. I have grown so much in my life...Also I have grown up...lol Well, my anti-deps are working, I'm accepting I am just like everyone else "Normal"..... I...	ally	5	756	Apr 2, 2007 by CJ
	Can't seem to catch a break (Preview) I'm feeling like things are pretty hopeless right now. Like I said last month, my husband left me, found out he's been talking to another woman....just talking he says and says he has stopped talking to her and that he will not have any contact with her again. But he still doesn't want to get back togethe...	Jayda	4	667	Apr 2, 2007 by Karilynn
	News about my niece and sister (Preview) I am continuing to rebuild a much happier life- moved into a new house, my job is going great, and I just keep getting better news about my health. Got the phone call from my mom that I knew would come soon. I made the decision to NOT talk to my mom about my sister's family's problems because I was burned year...	donewithitallandhappy	1	623	Apr 2, 2007 by Karilynn
	Attended a couples meeting last night (Preview) As you may know, my husband got out of detox on Thurs. He's been to at least one meeting a day since he left (Fri. he went to two). Last night he suggested that we attend this couples meeting. I didn't know what to expect because this is all so new for me. Basically, it is a meeting of mostly AA members and...	sash	4	724	Apr 2, 2007 by DanieH
	9th Tradition (Preview) I am in a step study group and am responsible for going over Tradition 9. Can any of you very wise people give me some insite on how Tradition 9 can be applied to the Alanon program and to everyday life. By the way the 9th tradition is "Our groups ought never be organized; but we may create service b...	artgirl	9	11243	Apr 2, 2007 by Rita G
	People pleasing and feeling trapped (Preview) ((((Everyone))))) Phil posted the other day about people pleasing and how to learn to say no. I have 2 major defects, people pleasing and the consequenses of saying yes when you mean no. And for a long long time, I considered that I had no choices about how my life went. Well, the 2 really go together. ...	rtexas	5	1178	Apr 2, 2007 by twinmom2
	He Wishes! (Preview) Hello Everyone!! It's been a long time since I've been here and I sure have missed the MIP board! My 90 day anniversary of leaving the AH is just a couple of days away now, and things are finally moving in the right direction for me. It hasn't been easy by a long shot......	afmom03	2	469	Apr 2, 2007 by CJ
	I am feeling down tonight (Preview) I'm sitting here at 10:00 on a Saturday night still in my pajamas from this morning. I have been fighting depression all day. I go from sitting on the pitty pot to beating myself up for not seeing through the A and his manipulation. I've been through this so many times. Doing the same thing over and ov...	JulieLynn	5	601	Apr 1, 2007 by marmare
	Oh me oh my.....I have to quit this (Preview) Oh I am so sick of this behavior that never changes. Both his AH and mine. AH is a dry drunk, I honestly think it was easier when he drank, then there was something to blame his stupid selfish behavior on, now it is easy to think it is my fault. But I won't go that route again, cause it isn't me, I am better than t...	doxie	6	642	Apr 1, 2007 by Maria123
	how long can this go on? (Preview) My guess is pretty darn long. My A has been drunk every night for I don't know how long now. The worst was the night before last. He picked me up from work and even though he was driving "OK" I could tell he had a good buzz going by the way he rudely interrupted me and talked non stop. I do not believe...	RainyJamie	6	922	Apr 1, 2007 by aunitedway
	Confronted my A--no visit 2--day (Preview) Well, My A and I were supposed to get together, here, at my place to be together on his day off. I called a few times this AM, but got no answer. I was not feeling up to par, so I went back to sleep. Noonish, I checked my phone and he left a rage-ful, alcohol-full mean message. I did call back. I said to him he didn...	hippietrippiechick	2	569	Apr 1, 2007 by hippietrippiechick
	DO YOU GUILT TRIP OTHERS INTO DOING THINGS YOUR WAY? (Preview) Oh man in the beginning of Alanon I did whatever it took, begging, crying, pleading, "making deals" so that I would get my way. It was especially hard for me to ASK for help around the house and all its chores it involves...so I would slam dishes around in the sink,,so the A would hear,,,,as h...	gardengal	9	879	Apr 1, 2007 by TLM
	April Business Meeting Canceled (Preview) The business Meeting that is schedule for tonight at 9pm est has been canceled. We have no agenda therefore no issues this month. Which isnt a bad thing in my opinion Next business meeting is Scheduled for May the 5th 2007 My term is up as business chair this month so Maria123 will start as your ne...	kerry5	0	408	Apr 1, 2007 by kerry5
	I did something wrong (Preview) I made a mistake at work a couple of days ago that could have had serious consequences. Stupidity, carelessness "I'm in a hurry I'm sure it's fine" - it wasn't fine. Now, a few days on, it looks like the fallout will be minimal - none of the really bad consequences happened. However, I've ha...	lin0606	5	737	Apr 1, 2007 by lin0606
	For Luna (Preview) I know this is going to sound strange, but would you post this to the board asking for prayers. I'm just to sad to. Nicholas was my best friend's son. All my friend keeps asking for is prayers. Thank you. http://www.wcnc.com/news/topstories/stories/wcnc-032607-krg-logging_fatal.309e40b...	debilyn	10	591	Mar 31, 2007 by carolena
	Odd thing happened last night (Preview) I got an email from my husband last night. (That is kind of a weird thing to say lol) Anyway, he and a friend of ours have been emailing each other back and forth about her husband. Her husband is also an A. She and I have basically the same story when it comes to our A husbands. I see alot of my old self in h...	melamom815	7	900	Mar 31, 2007 by lin0606
	Progress (Preview) AH called his sponser last night. His assignment is he needs to call him everyday for 30 days. Ughwere dreading this phone bill b/c this guy loves to talk. Each phone call has lasted an hour or more! His darn boss never picked him up for work this morning. AH called his recovering cousin and told him b...	DanieH	9	670	Mar 30, 2007 by debilyn
	better (Preview) I am feeling alot better. Tuesday was the last time I lost it and called my ex ah. I saw that there was a "trigger" that happened that made me feel the need to call him and be abused. So, when the triggers came up I prayed. Please take him, I am not in control, your will not mine, this situation is n...	serendipity	3	527	Mar 30, 2007 by debilyn
	transitioning is painful (Preview) I know one reason that I put off this transition for so so long is that I knew it would be painful. I also knew I would resent the a even more. I know absolutely these days I cannot live with his self destructive, totally disrespectful, unloving behavior anymore. I am sick of being last on the list. I am al...	maresie2	7	679	Mar 30, 2007 by maresie2
	Husband now out of detox (Preview) My husband got out today. I have decided to be cautiously optimistic. I see everyone's replies where they tell me to work on me and get myself well. honestly, it never even occurred to me that there was anything with me. In my case, I just couldn't take his crap anymore and I basically told him that if he d...	sash	8	789	Mar 30, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Ok Tiger2006............I'm joining the sucky week bandwagon. (Preview) My house is up for bids at the courthouse, we borrowed the money from my FIL and went down and paid that foreclosure. But it didn't stop the vulchers from parking in front of my house taking pictures so they can pounce on it if it did go on the market. Mind you, I have children. So then we came up with the idea t...	Friendofyours	4	579	Mar 30, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Sobriety! ye right (Preview) Ok I been married and living with an active alchoholic for oh years before I ever knew about Alanon, so to this day I'm as crazy and as warped thinking as a person can get in those circumstances. Yep I done it all, I banked every wrong that he done to me with credit, and it would all spwe out of me time after tim...	Katy	3	632	Mar 30, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Am I Just REALLY Confused??? (Preview) Hi Everyone, I haven't written for a while and a lot has happened and nothing has changed. He admits only to me, that he's an alcoholic. He knows that it's not good for him. He does know that he's done and said things that have been extremely hurtful. He talks about quitting all the time, but o...	HadEnuff	5	652	Mar 30, 2007 by DanieH
	I didnt realize (Preview) Last night, I was driving my AH to his meeting. I noticed he took his NA book. He mentioned they read from there...I thought that was strange. I thought he was going to AA meetings...no...its NA meetings. He said in AA meetings they dont want to hear about drugs at all..or at least thats what hes been t...	DanieH	9	801	Mar 30, 2007 by DanieH
	People Pleasing....Having Trouble Saying "NO" ? (Preview) by Kali Munro, M.Ed., Psychotherapist, 2001(originally published at BodyTalk Magazine.com, Aug. 2001) Do you have trouble saying NO? Do you do things for other people but almost never ask anybody to do things for you? You may be a people pleaser. People pleasers think of other peoples needs before...	Phil	4	1267	Mar 30, 2007 by annmarie
	Newbie here...warning, this is gonna be LONG... (Preview) Okay ladies and gents...This is my first time here. My name is Teresa. I'm a 27 year old Michiganian married to an alcoholic who is in total denial of his disease and becoming increasingly depressed, angry, and emotionally abusive. Here's the long story about how I ended up here: Sunday night I we...	Reece	12	717	Mar 29, 2007 by maresie2
	They won't give me the check... (Preview) But at least I tried!	carolinagirl	8	933	Mar 29, 2007 by maresie2
	Still Powerless (Preview) Yes, my dear friends, Today again, I am still powerless over people, places, things and situations. That beautiful eldest daughter. Let's call her AG. AG was arrested. She was already on probation, now a possible federal offense. We, her family, refused to bail her out. Her abusive boyfriend...	Rita G	6	619	Mar 29, 2007 by Karilynn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.