Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

serendipity · serendipity

i made the boundry that my ex ah could not see or have any contact with me or the kids. if he wants to see them i need something legal. he has called a few times and i don't say anything just "get a lawyer". it was hard for me but it got easier. yesterday he called and asked to speak to the kids and i sai...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Well, now that my A has not been living w/ me, it has gotten worse, but in a different way. I say I do not miss the nightly chaos that can spring up at a drunken moment, or when I have had enough, not taking my meds right and flipping out. I think him even being here aggravates my mental illness. For one, I have f...

albertarose · albertarose

Last week I was full of sorrow about my AH and I splitting up and possibly heading to the divorce courts. This past weekend I spent the entire weekend with him and he has told me that after his two binges ober tyhe past two or three weeks he has realized that he is not happy and he wants a better life. /he said t...

david62 · david62

Hi (((((Family))))) I got the following in an email and thought it had a beautiful message so decided to share it with you. (Have the kleenex ready, I needed it!) A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside of her patient. "Your son is here," she said to the old man. She had to rep...

DanieH · DanieH

Yesterday was exactly 1 week that AH has been clean. I know you have to take one day at a time, but Im sooo proud of him. He was suppose to go to a meeting w/ his cousin friday night, but his cousin got home late, so the 3 of us went food shopping instead. Of course, we had to drive through the college area, so a bu...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((((Family)))))))), Just wanted to wish all of you who celebrate Passover this week, a blessed and joyous Passover. I have been honored to observe it and participate in it with dear friends, and it truly is wonderful. Love and blessings to you and your families. Live strong, Karilynn & Pi...

Miranda · Miranda

One of my closest guy friends, Eric, shot himself last night. There were no signs... I haven't even really had a chance to talk to him since I left school months ago...Every once in a while, we'd talk on the phone, and he even came to visit the kids after the twins were born. He never led on any indication th...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

I posted earlier about how it sucked that I was working nights while A hung out and worked on his beer belly. A few people replied that I need to hold my priorities; take care of me, my family, and my home. I appreciate this and it is a good way to keep things in perspective. I switched my scheduling. I work...

maresie2 · maresie2

I have just been gone a few days and come back to get a few more things. The house is a real mess. The A immediately steps in with what I have contributed to the mess as soon as I get in the door. The electricity is going to be cut off. He just lays around and watches the few channels he can get on TV. His favori...

lonelymom · lonelymom

Hi I just found this board and read some. I felt after reading some posts that so many people would understand what I was going through and right now I feel like nobody does. He has been drinking for the last 2 years, it has gotten worse and worse. He blames me for EVERYTHING, it's always my fault, he's neve...

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((((((((yo roomies))))))))))))))))))))))) WOW!!!! I feel as if I have been on a journey the last few weeks. I have grown so much in my life...Also I have grown up...lol Well, my anti-deps are working, I'm accepting I am just like everyone else "Normal"..... I...

Jayda · Jayda

I'm feeling like things are pretty hopeless right now. Like I said last month, my husband left me, found out he's been talking to another woman....just talking he says and says he has stopped talking to her and that he will not have any contact with her again. But he still doesn't want to get back togethe...

donewithitallandhappy · donewithitallandhappy

I am continuing to rebuild a much happier life- moved into a new house, my job is going great, and I just keep getting better news about my health. Got the phone call from my mom that I knew would come soon. I made the decision to NOT talk to my mom about my sister's family's problems because I was burned year...

sash · sash

As you may know, my husband got out of detox on Thurs. He's been to at least one meeting a day since he left (Fri. he went to two). Last night he suggested that we attend this couples meeting. I didn't know what to expect because this is all so new for me. Basically, it is a meeting of mostly AA members and...

artgirl · artgirl

I am in a step study group and am responsible for going over Tradition 9. Can any of you very wise people give me some insite on how Tradition 9 can be applied to the Alanon program and to everyday life. By the way the 9th tradition is "Our groups ought never be organized; but we may create service b...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone))))) Phil posted the other day about people pleasing and how to learn to say no. I have 2 major defects, people pleasing and the consequenses of saying yes when you mean no. And for a long long time, I considered that I had no choices about how my life went. Well, the 2 really go together. ...

afmom03 · afmom03

Hello Everyone!! It's been a long time since I've been here and I sure have missed the MIP board! My 90 day anniversary of leaving the AH is just a couple of days away now, and things are finally moving in the right direction for me. It hasn't been easy by a long shot......

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

I'm sitting here at 10:00 on a Saturday night still in my pajamas from this morning. I have been fighting depression all day. I go from sitting on the pitty pot to beating myself up for not seeing through the A and his manipulation. I've been through this so many times. Doing the same thing over and ov...

doxie · doxie

Oh I am so sick of this behavior that never changes. Both his AH and mine. AH is a dry drunk, I honestly think it was easier when he drank, then there was something to blame his stupid selfish behavior on, now it is easy to think it is my fault. But I won't go that route again, cause it isn't me, I am better than t...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

My guess is pretty darn long. My A has been drunk every night for I don't know how long now. The worst was the night before last. He picked me up from work and even though he was driving "OK" I could tell he had a good buzz going by the way he rudely interrupted me and talked non stop. I do not believe...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Well, My A and I were supposed to get together, here, at my place to be together on his day off. I called a few times this AM, but got no answer. I was not feeling up to par, so I went back to sleep. Noonish, I checked my phone and he left a rage-ful, alcohol-full mean message. I did call back. I said to him he didn...

gardengal · gardengal

Oh man in the beginning of Alanon I did whatever it took, begging, crying, pleading, "making deals" so that I would get my way. It was especially hard for me to ASK for help around the house and all its chores it involves...so I would slam dishes around in the sink,,so the A would hear,,,,as h...

kerry5 · kerry5

The business Meeting that is schedule for tonight at 9pm est has been canceled. We have no agenda therefore no issues this month. Which isnt a bad thing in my opinion

Next business meeting is Scheduled for May the 5th 2007 My term is up as business chair this month so Maria123 will start as your ne...

lin0606 · lin0606

I made a mistake at work a couple of days ago that could have had serious consequences. Stupidity, carelessness "I'm in a hurry I'm sure it's fine" - it wasn't fine. Now, a few days on, it looks like the fallout will be minimal - none of the really bad consequences happened. However, I've ha...

debilyn · debilyn

I know this is going to sound strange, but would you post this to the board asking for prayers. I'm just to sad to. Nicholas was my best friend's son. All my friend keeps asking for is prayers. Thank you. http://www.wcnc.com/news/topstories/stories/wcnc-032607-krg-logging_fatal.309e40b...

melamom815 · melamom815

I got an email from my husband last night. (That is kind of a weird thing to say lol) Anyway, he and a friend of ours have been emailing each other back and forth about her husband. Her husband is also an A. She and I have basically the same story when it comes to our A husbands. I see alot of my old self in h...

DanieH · DanieH

AH called his sponser last night. His assignment is he needs to call him everyday for 30 days. Ughwere dreading this phone bill b/c this guy loves to talk. Each phone call has lasted an hour or more! His darn boss never picked him up for work this morning. AH called his recovering cousin and told him b...

serendipity · serendipity

I am feeling alot better. Tuesday was the last time I lost it and called my ex ah. I saw that there was a "trigger" that happened that made me feel the need to call him and be abused. So, when the triggers came up I prayed. Please take him, I am not in control, your will not mine, this situation is n...

maresie2 · maresie2

I know one reason that I put off this transition for so so long is that I knew it would be painful. I also knew I would resent the a even more. I know absolutely these days I cannot live with his self destructive, totally disrespectful, unloving behavior anymore. I am sick of being last on the list. I am al...

sash · sash

My husband got out today. I have decided to be cautiously optimistic. I see everyone's replies where they tell me to work on me and get myself well. honestly, it never even occurred to me that there was anything with me. In my case, I just couldn't take his crap anymore and I basically told him that if he d...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

My house is up for bids at the courthouse, we borrowed the money from my FIL and went down and paid that foreclosure. But it didn't stop the vulchers from parking in front of my house taking pictures so they can pounce on it if it did go on the market. Mind you, I have children. So then we came up with the idea t...

Katy · Katy

Ok I been married and living with an active alchoholic for oh years before I ever knew about Alanon, so to this day I'm as crazy and as warped thinking as a person can get in those circumstances. Yep I done it all, I banked every wrong that he done to me with credit, and it would all spwe out of me time after tim...

HadEnuff · HadEnuff

Hi Everyone, I haven't written for a while and a lot has happened and nothing has changed. He admits only to me, that he's an alcoholic. He knows that it's not good for him. He does know that he's done and said things that have been extremely hurtful. He talks about quitting all the time, but o...

DanieH · DanieH

Last night, I was driving my AH to his meeting. I noticed he took his NA book. He mentioned they read from there...I thought that was strange. I thought he was going to AA meetings...no...its NA meetings. He said in AA meetings they dont want to hear about drugs at all..or at least thats what hes been t...

Phil · Phil

by Kali Munro, M.Ed., Psychotherapist, 2001(originally published at BodyTalk Magazine.com, Aug. 2001) Do you have trouble saying NO? Do you do things for other people but almost never ask anybody to do things for you? You may be a people pleaser. People pleasers think of other peoples needs before...

Reece · Reece

Okay ladies and gents...This is my first time here. My name is Teresa. I'm a 27 year old Michiganian married to an alcoholic who is in total denial of his disease and becoming increasingly depressed, angry, and emotionally abusive. Here's the long story about how I ended up here: Sunday night I we...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

But at least I tried!

Rita G · Rita G

Yes, my dear friends, Today again, I am still powerless over people, places, things and situations. That beautiful eldest daughter. Let's call her AG. AG was arrested. She was already on probation, now a possible federal offense. We, her family, refused to bail her out. Her abusive boyfriend...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Well I got the car and wish I wouldn't have. It is missing 3rd and 4th gear so I really can't even sell it now. I took my new friend from work to get it and hopefully didn't scare her off with the 50 rum bottles and needles that were all over. It was truly awful and so embarrassing. I have been feeling resen...

ollie · ollie

Hi Family, I dont post often but im with you all every day reading and i hope learning,i have a question i hope you can help me with. We have been back together now since xmas,in this time our house has been drink free. Things have been a hundred percent better,he is doing his best to please ,but with no job,...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Oh this week has abosolutely SUCKED. Just sucked. First there were the phone messages on my cell from the past 48 hours. A sampling: "I've decided that, in light of your behavior and attitude, it would just be best for everyone if you just didn't come home anymore. Just call me when the tuition...

Feather · Feather

It's sad how this rotten disease progresses, slowly but surely. As many of you may remember my A and I are separated, we have 3 children and when he is sober he is welcome to spend time with us all. (He is a binge drinker) Our 16yo daughter is proving to be handful with the usual teen rebellion. Anyway had a...

DanieH · DanieH

My name is Danielle and Im 31 years old. Ive been married for almost 6 years, but weve been together for 12. We have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and Im 6 months pregnant w/ our 2nd girl. My husband just currently realized hes an alcoholic. I always knew something was different, but obviously I cannot tell him...

artygirl · artygirl

Hello I just wanted to give you a quick update. I haven't been posting much lately. My divorce from my A/Cokehead husband was finalized in court on Monday. It wasn't easy... but it's done. It was supposed to be final last Monday, but at the very last minute (last Monday morning), my AH hired a lawyer...

Rita G · Rita G

It has been one year ago today that I joined the wonderful MIP family. Wow, seems like a lot longer. Just wanted to take a moment to say "Thanks" Thanks for adding to my recovery. I have gained so much just by being a member. I have been able to do some service work, learned more about Al-Anon, ge...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Well now I'm kicking myself in the hiney for giving him that car as myself and my new coworker friend have to go out to myrtle beach today to pick it up from the impound. I got the call from him last night, he's in jail. This time for larceny, maybe more we'll see. The cop asked me if he was diabetic, apparentl...

TLC2 · TLC2

Took son back to the city to see the specialist. He has inflamation in his eye and was given a steroid for it. The doc couldn't tell us yet how he is going to make out as far as his vision is concerned. I went back to son's last night to give him his meds (he isn't able to do it himself) while his fiancee wasat wor...

sash · sash

This is his third day in detox. He already sounds better. He will be there another 3-4 days and then he is enrolled in an intensive out-patient programs. We have dealt with his alcoholism for the las two years and I was really giving up hope. Finally he admitted his problem and agreed to go to rehab. I am tr...

Reece · Reece

Me again... Just asking for any opinions on which book related to Al-anon you would recommend the most. I'm looking to buy just one book right now (or check it out from the library) as I'm in a really tight financial situation currently. So what book would you recommend the most for someone new to Al-a...

Hopeless in AZ · Hopeless in AZ

Hello, I am new here and would like to share my story and get any advice/support and or hear from others who can relate. I grew up with an alcoholic father all my life. He isn't the kind that drinks everyday but rather has a binge once, twice, or three times a year, usually lasting between 2-4 weeks. Someti...

still searching · still searching

I am calling a attorney today to set up a appointment so I can find out where I stand on legal and money issues. I want to have a full time job with benefits so that I can take care of myself and the children. I have not worked for the last 10 years, as I have been a stay at home Mom. I really was trying to wait to do a...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), Well I've been having one of those "moments" when I know I must be getting better. I've had a very busy weekend and start of the week with no end in sight. Most of you know that I work retail, and right now it is the second busiest time of the year for footwear next to back to schoo...

maresie2 · maresie2

I am about 50-60% moved. there is of course numerous stuff that is left "hanging" as normal with the A. He can't have any pressure put on him but doesn't seem to feel the same way about putting pressure on me. The issue is for me that I am still looking for him to spring forth as the man he claimed t...

Seeker · Seeker

My son is 47 years old and an alcoholic. He's been drinking since he was 17. Needless to say, I've learned a lot over the years, but , maybe not enough? Let me say here that he has a genetic disposition for mental disorders. The worst (at least known) is bi-polar with manic overtones.Several bl...

kicky · kicky

I'm dating again, after 7 years with my ex-A. Ironically, this new person(an old friend)is in AA and has been sober 2 years. Long history...enough said. But the issue here is me. I'm trying to manipulate this relationship. It is obvious he likes me. And he likes my attention. But he is very concentrate...

babysteps · babysteps

He is so emotionally fragile that I can't share the burden of anything with him. If our finances suck (which they do, in a very scary way), it is my responsibility. If I am feeling low, afraid, lonely, mad...my problem. Last week I wrote about how he has recognized that he reacts too strongly to how I am fe...

babysteps · babysteps

I am having a tough one. I am having my period to begin with (sorry guys), and my hormones are making it hard to cope with reality. My AH has been on another bender. It's kind of funny that I call it that because in reality he drinks non-stop for 3 weeks until he is sick as a dog, spends a few days recovering, th...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

She cuts herself too, like I used to. Self Mutililation. Another issue that makes me want someone to untie my hands about all this. I don't have custody of her and am in no shape to be there for her 24/7.

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Well, I was awakened by a call this morning from my A husband's new $20 an hr. job asking if I had seen him, he hasn't been to work in two days and this is their emergency contact... I had to tell them sorry don't know... I called his sponsor and he had kicked him out on Friday I guess for being...

EarthAngel · EarthAngel

I recently found out Iam pregnant. Ive been married for one year now and the marriage has been both wonderful and challenging. My husband is addicted to pot. Now, I am worried about bringing a baby into this situation. I am feeling sick to my stomach every time I smell the pot smoke now. I worry that my hus...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	boundry (Preview) i made the boundry that my ex ah could not see or have any contact with me or the kids. if he wants to see them i need something legal. he has called a few times and i don't say anything just "get a lawyer". it was hard for me but it got easier. yesterday he called and asked to speak to the kids and i sai...	serendipity	2	451	Apr 3, 2007 by Rita G
	NEED TO GIVE MY A AN ULTIMAUM--NEED SOME ESH PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Preview) Well, now that my A has not been living w/ me, it has gotten worse, but in a different way. I say I do not miss the nightly chaos that can spring up at a drunken moment, or when I have had enough, not taking my meds right and flipping out. I think him even being here aggravates my mental illness. For one, I have f...	hippietrippiechick	14	857	Apr 3, 2007 by Friendofyours
	What a Turnaround (Preview) Last week I was full of sorrow about my AH and I splitting up and possibly heading to the divorce courts. This past weekend I spent the entire weekend with him and he has told me that after his two binges ober tyhe past two or three weeks he has realized that he is not happy and he wants a better life. /he said t...	albertarose	5	627	Apr 3, 2007 by DanieH
	Just Being There (Preview) Hi (((((Family))))) I got the following in an email and thought it had a beautiful message so decided to share it with you. (Have the kleenex ready, I needed it!) A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside of her patient. "Your son is here," she said to the old man. She had to rep...	david62	10	657	Apr 2, 2007 by MaggiG
	1 week (Preview) Yesterday was exactly 1 week that AH has been clean. I know you have to take one day at a time, but Im sooo proud of him. He was suppose to go to a meeting w/ his cousin friday night, but his cousin got home late, so the 3 of us went food shopping instead. Of course, we had to drive through the college area, so a bu...	DanieH	8	501	Apr 2, 2007 by albertarose
	Passover (Preview) (((((((((Family)))))))), Just wanted to wish all of you who celebrate Passover this week, a blessed and joyous Passover. I have been honored to observe it and participate in it with dear friends, and it truly is wonderful. Love and blessings to you and your families. Live strong, Karilynn & Pi...	Karilynn	4	411	Apr 2, 2007 by Leetle
	My friend shot himself last night... (Preview) One of my closest guy friends, Eric, shot himself last night. There were no signs... I haven't even really had a chance to talk to him since I left school months ago...Every once in a while, we'd talk on the phone, and he even came to visit the kids after the twins were born. He never led on any indication th...	Miranda	15	897	Apr 2, 2007 by TLC2
	making a change (Preview) I posted earlier about how it sucked that I was working nights while A hung out and worked on his beer belly. A few people replied that I need to hold my priorities; take care of me, my family, and my home. I appreciate this and it is a good way to keep things in perspective. I switched my scheduling. I work...	RainyJamie	1	413	Apr 2, 2007 by Barbs45
	being out of the way of the A (Preview) I have just been gone a few days and come back to get a few more things. The house is a real mess. The A immediately steps in with what I have contributed to the mess as soon as I get in the door. The electricity is going to be cut off. He just lays around and watches the few channels he can get on TV. His favori...	maresie2	9	587	Apr 2, 2007 by megan
	new here...feel so alone (Preview) Hi I just found this board and read some. I felt after reading some posts that so many people would understand what I was going through and right now I feel like nobody does. He has been drinking for the last 2 years, it has gotten worse and worse. He blames me for EVERYTHING, it's always my fault, he's neve...	lonelymom	9	699	Apr 2, 2007 by gardengal
	WATCH HOW I'M GROWING (Preview) (((((((((((((((((((((yo roomies))))))))))))))))))))))) WOW!!!! I feel as if I have been on a journey the last few weeks. I have grown so much in my life...Also I have grown up...lol Well, my anti-deps are working, I'm accepting I am just like everyone else "Normal"..... I...	ally	5	720	Apr 2, 2007 by CJ
	Can't seem to catch a break (Preview) I'm feeling like things are pretty hopeless right now. Like I said last month, my husband left me, found out he's been talking to another woman....just talking he says and says he has stopped talking to her and that he will not have any contact with her again. But he still doesn't want to get back togethe...	Jayda	4	631	Apr 2, 2007 by Karilynn
	News about my niece and sister (Preview) I am continuing to rebuild a much happier life- moved into a new house, my job is going great, and I just keep getting better news about my health. Got the phone call from my mom that I knew would come soon. I made the decision to NOT talk to my mom about my sister's family's problems because I was burned year...	donewithitallandhappy	1	590	Apr 2, 2007 by Karilynn
	Attended a couples meeting last night (Preview) As you may know, my husband got out of detox on Thurs. He's been to at least one meeting a day since he left (Fri. he went to two). Last night he suggested that we attend this couples meeting. I didn't know what to expect because this is all so new for me. Basically, it is a meeting of mostly AA members and...	sash	4	690	Apr 2, 2007 by DanieH
	9th Tradition (Preview) I am in a step study group and am responsible for going over Tradition 9. Can any of you very wise people give me some insite on how Tradition 9 can be applied to the Alanon program and to everyday life. By the way the 9th tradition is "Our groups ought never be organized; but we may create service b...	artgirl	9	10657	Apr 2, 2007 by Rita G
	People pleasing and feeling trapped (Preview) ((((Everyone))))) Phil posted the other day about people pleasing and how to learn to say no. I have 2 major defects, people pleasing and the consequenses of saying yes when you mean no. And for a long long time, I considered that I had no choices about how my life went. Well, the 2 really go together. ...	rtexas	5	1099	Apr 2, 2007 by twinmom2
	He Wishes! (Preview) Hello Everyone!! It's been a long time since I've been here and I sure have missed the MIP board! My 90 day anniversary of leaving the AH is just a couple of days away now, and things are finally moving in the right direction for me. It hasn't been easy by a long shot......	afmom03	2	432	Apr 2, 2007 by CJ
	I am feeling down tonight (Preview) I'm sitting here at 10:00 on a Saturday night still in my pajamas from this morning. I have been fighting depression all day. I go from sitting on the pitty pot to beating myself up for not seeing through the A and his manipulation. I've been through this so many times. Doing the same thing over and ov...	JulieLynn	5	565	Apr 1, 2007 by marmare
	Oh me oh my.....I have to quit this (Preview) Oh I am so sick of this behavior that never changes. Both his AH and mine. AH is a dry drunk, I honestly think it was easier when he drank, then there was something to blame his stupid selfish behavior on, now it is easy to think it is my fault. But I won't go that route again, cause it isn't me, I am better than t...	doxie	6	609	Apr 1, 2007 by Maria123
	how long can this go on? (Preview) My guess is pretty darn long. My A has been drunk every night for I don't know how long now. The worst was the night before last. He picked me up from work and even though he was driving "OK" I could tell he had a good buzz going by the way he rudely interrupted me and talked non stop. I do not believe...	RainyJamie	6	883	Apr 1, 2007 by aunitedway
	Confronted my A--no visit 2--day (Preview) Well, My A and I were supposed to get together, here, at my place to be together on his day off. I called a few times this AM, but got no answer. I was not feeling up to par, so I went back to sleep. Noonish, I checked my phone and he left a rage-ful, alcohol-full mean message. I did call back. I said to him he didn...	hippietrippiechick	2	535	Apr 1, 2007 by hippietrippiechick
	DO YOU GUILT TRIP OTHERS INTO DOING THINGS YOUR WAY? (Preview) Oh man in the beginning of Alanon I did whatever it took, begging, crying, pleading, "making deals" so that I would get my way. It was especially hard for me to ASK for help around the house and all its chores it involves...so I would slam dishes around in the sink,,so the A would hear,,,,as h...	gardengal	9	842	Apr 1, 2007 by TLM
	April Business Meeting Canceled (Preview) The business Meeting that is schedule for tonight at 9pm est has been canceled. We have no agenda therefore no issues this month. Which isnt a bad thing in my opinion Next business meeting is Scheduled for May the 5th 2007 My term is up as business chair this month so Maria123 will start as your ne...	kerry5	0	372	Apr 1, 2007 by kerry5
	I did something wrong (Preview) I made a mistake at work a couple of days ago that could have had serious consequences. Stupidity, carelessness "I'm in a hurry I'm sure it's fine" - it wasn't fine. Now, a few days on, it looks like the fallout will be minimal - none of the really bad consequences happened. However, I've ha...	lin0606	5	703	Apr 1, 2007 by lin0606
	For Luna (Preview) I know this is going to sound strange, but would you post this to the board asking for prayers. I'm just to sad to. Nicholas was my best friend's son. All my friend keeps asking for is prayers. Thank you. http://www.wcnc.com/news/topstories/stories/wcnc-032607-krg-logging_fatal.309e40b...	debilyn	10	552	Mar 31, 2007 by carolena
	Odd thing happened last night (Preview) I got an email from my husband last night. (That is kind of a weird thing to say lol) Anyway, he and a friend of ours have been emailing each other back and forth about her husband. Her husband is also an A. She and I have basically the same story when it comes to our A husbands. I see alot of my old self in h...	melamom815	7	860	Mar 31, 2007 by lin0606
	Progress (Preview) AH called his sponser last night. His assignment is he needs to call him everyday for 30 days. Ughwere dreading this phone bill b/c this guy loves to talk. Each phone call has lasted an hour or more! His darn boss never picked him up for work this morning. AH called his recovering cousin and told him b...	DanieH	9	605	Mar 30, 2007 by debilyn
	better (Preview) I am feeling alot better. Tuesday was the last time I lost it and called my ex ah. I saw that there was a "trigger" that happened that made me feel the need to call him and be abused. So, when the triggers came up I prayed. Please take him, I am not in control, your will not mine, this situation is n...	serendipity	3	466	Mar 30, 2007 by debilyn
	transitioning is painful (Preview) I know one reason that I put off this transition for so so long is that I knew it would be painful. I also knew I would resent the a even more. I know absolutely these days I cannot live with his self destructive, totally disrespectful, unloving behavior anymore. I am sick of being last on the list. I am al...	maresie2	7	644	Mar 30, 2007 by maresie2
	Husband now out of detox (Preview) My husband got out today. I have decided to be cautiously optimistic. I see everyone's replies where they tell me to work on me and get myself well. honestly, it never even occurred to me that there was anything with me. In my case, I just couldn't take his crap anymore and I basically told him that if he d...	sash	8	751	Mar 30, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Ok Tiger2006............I'm joining the sucky week bandwagon. (Preview) My house is up for bids at the courthouse, we borrowed the money from my FIL and went down and paid that foreclosure. But it didn't stop the vulchers from parking in front of my house taking pictures so they can pounce on it if it did go on the market. Mind you, I have children. So then we came up with the idea t...	Friendofyours	4	545	Mar 30, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Sobriety! ye right (Preview) Ok I been married and living with an active alchoholic for oh years before I ever knew about Alanon, so to this day I'm as crazy and as warped thinking as a person can get in those circumstances. Yep I done it all, I banked every wrong that he done to me with credit, and it would all spwe out of me time after tim...	Katy	3	598	Mar 30, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Am I Just REALLY Confused??? (Preview) Hi Everyone, I haven't written for a while and a lot has happened and nothing has changed. He admits only to me, that he's an alcoholic. He knows that it's not good for him. He does know that he's done and said things that have been extremely hurtful. He talks about quitting all the time, but o...	HadEnuff	5	616	Mar 30, 2007 by DanieH
	I didnt realize (Preview) Last night, I was driving my AH to his meeting. I noticed he took his NA book. He mentioned they read from there...I thought that was strange. I thought he was going to AA meetings...no...its NA meetings. He said in AA meetings they dont want to hear about drugs at all..or at least thats what hes been t...	DanieH	9	763	Mar 30, 2007 by DanieH
	People Pleasing....Having Trouble Saying "NO" ? (Preview) by Kali Munro, M.Ed., Psychotherapist, 2001(originally published at BodyTalk Magazine.com, Aug. 2001) Do you have trouble saying NO? Do you do things for other people but almost never ask anybody to do things for you? You may be a people pleaser. People pleasers think of other peoples needs before...	Phil	4	1212	Mar 30, 2007 by annmarie
	Newbie here...warning, this is gonna be LONG... (Preview) Okay ladies and gents...This is my first time here. My name is Teresa. I'm a 27 year old Michiganian married to an alcoholic who is in total denial of his disease and becoming increasingly depressed, angry, and emotionally abusive. Here's the long story about how I ended up here: Sunday night I we...	Reece	12	682	Mar 29, 2007 by maresie2
	They won't give me the check... (Preview) But at least I tried!	carolinagirl	8	895	Mar 29, 2007 by maresie2
	Still Powerless (Preview) Yes, my dear friends, Today again, I am still powerless over people, places, things and situations. That beautiful eldest daughter. Let's call her AG. AG was arrested. She was already on probation, now a possible federal offense. We, her family, refused to bail her out. Her abusive boyfriend...	Rita G	6	582	Mar 29, 2007 by Karilynn
	Update.... (Preview) Well I got the car and wish I wouldn't have. It is missing 3rd and 4th gear so I really can't even sell it now. I took my new friend from work to get it and hopefully didn't scare her off with the 50 rum bottles and needles that were all over. It was truly awful and so embarrassing. I have been feeling resen...	carolinagirl	8	630	Mar 29, 2007 by aunitedway
	IS THIS NORMAL (Preview) Hi Family, I dont post often but im with you all every day reading and i hope learning,i have a question i hope you can help me with. We have been back together now since xmas,in this time our house has been drink free. Things have been a hundred percent better,he is doing his best to please ,but with no job,...	ollie	4	516	Mar 29, 2007 by ollie
	My week has absolutely SUCKED...and I can't stop laughing! (Preview) Oh this week has abosolutely SUCKED. Just sucked. First there were the phone messages on my cell from the past 48 hours. A sampling: "I've decided that, in light of your behavior and attitude, it would just be best for everyone if you just didn't come home anymore. Just call me when the tuition...	Tiger2006	6	568	Mar 29, 2007 by debilyn
	Still shaking my head..... (Preview) It's sad how this rotten disease progresses, slowly but surely. As many of you may remember my A and I are separated, we have 3 children and when he is sober he is welcome to spend time with us all. (He is a binge drinker) Our 16yo daughter is proving to be handful with the usual teen rebellion. Anyway had a...	Feather	5	460	Mar 29, 2007 by Tiger2006
	New here (Preview) My name is Danielle and Im 31 years old. Ive been married for almost 6 years, but weve been together for 12. We have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and Im 6 months pregnant w/ our 2nd girl. My husband just currently realized hes an alcoholic. I always knew something was different, but obviously I cannot tell him...	DanieH	8	574	Mar 29, 2007 by carosie
	Moving on... (Preview) Hello I just wanted to give you a quick update. I haven't been posting much lately. My divorce from my A/Cokehead husband was finalized in court on Monday. It wasn't easy... but it's done. It was supposed to be final last Monday, but at the very last minute (last Monday morning), my AH hired a lawyer...	artygirl	7	562	Mar 29, 2007 by artygirl
	One Year (Preview) It has been one year ago today that I joined the wonderful MIP family. Wow, seems like a lot longer. Just wanted to take a moment to say "Thanks" Thanks for adding to my recovery. I have gained so much just by being a member. I have been able to do some service work, learned more about Al-Anon, ge...	Rita G	6	503	Mar 29, 2007 by maire rua
	He's in jail again and the car is impounded... (Preview) Well now I'm kicking myself in the hiney for giving him that car as myself and my new coworker friend have to go out to myrtle beach today to pick it up from the impound. I got the call from him last night, he's in jail. This time for larceny, maybe more we'll see. The cop asked me if he was diabetic, apparentl...	carolinagirl	8	609	Mar 29, 2007 by maire rua
	UPDATE ON SON (Preview) Took son back to the city to see the specialist. He has inflamation in his eye and was given a steroid for it. The doc couldn't tell us yet how he is going to make out as far as his vision is concerned. I went back to son's last night to give him his meds (he isn't able to do it himself) while his fiancee wasat wor...	TLC2	4	547	Mar 28, 2007 by wp
	My husband is currently in detox (Preview) This is his third day in detox. He already sounds better. He will be there another 3-4 days and then he is enrolled in an intensive out-patient programs. We have dealt with his alcoholism for the las two years and I was really giving up hope. Finally he admitted his problem and agreed to go to rehab. I am tr...	sash	8	664	Mar 28, 2007 by sash
	Newbie strikes again (Preview) Me again... Just asking for any opinions on which book related to Al-anon you would recommend the most. I'm looking to buy just one book right now (or check it out from the library) as I'm in a really tight financial situation currently. So what book would you recommend the most for someone new to Al-a...	Reece	5	493	Mar 28, 2007 by canadianguy
	My Story....... (Preview) Hello, I am new here and would like to share my story and get any advice/support and or hear from others who can relate. I grew up with an alcoholic father all my life. He isn't the kind that drinks everyday but rather has a binge once, twice, or three times a year, usually lasting between 2-4 weeks. Someti...	Hopeless in AZ	7	834	Mar 28, 2007 by Hopeless in AZ
	attorney (Preview) I am calling a attorney today to set up a appointment so I can find out where I stand on legal and money issues. I want to have a full time job with benefits so that I can take care of myself and the children. I have not worked for the last 10 years, as I have been a stay at home Mom. I really was trying to wait to do a...	still searching	6	1530	Mar 28, 2007 by Leetle
	Learning to say NO w/o the guilt. (Preview) ((((Family)))), Well I've been having one of those "moments" when I know I must be getting better. I've had a very busy weekend and start of the week with no end in sight. Most of you know that I work retail, and right now it is the second busiest time of the year for footwear next to back to schoo...	Karilynn	4	631	Mar 28, 2007 by Rita G
	when you are out the door and still looking for him to change (Preview) I am about 50-60% moved. there is of course numerous stuff that is left "hanging" as normal with the A. He can't have any pressure put on him but doesn't seem to feel the same way about putting pressure on me. The issue is for me that I am still looking for him to spring forth as the man he claimed t...	maresie2	6	570	Mar 28, 2007 by maresie2
	need information (Preview) My son is 47 years old and an alcoholic. He's been drinking since he was 17. Needless to say, I've learned a lot over the years, but , maybe not enough? Let me say here that he has a genetic disposition for mental disorders. The worst (at least known) is bi-polar with manic overtones.Several bl...	Seeker	9	632	Mar 28, 2007 by canadianguy
	Still trying to control...when will I learn? (Preview) I'm dating again, after 7 years with my ex-A. Ironically, this new person(an old friend)is in AA and has been sober 2 years. Long history...enough said. But the issue here is me. I'm trying to manipulate this relationship. It is obvious he likes me. And he likes my attention. But he is very concentrate...	kicky	3	498	Mar 28, 2007 by Rita G
	One more thing... (Preview) He is so emotionally fragile that I can't share the burden of anything with him. If our finances suck (which they do, in a very scary way), it is my responsibility. If I am feeling low, afraid, lonely, mad...my problem. Last week I wrote about how he has recognized that he reacts too strongly to how I am fe...	babysteps	1	334	Mar 28, 2007 by Rita G
	Having a hard day (Preview) I am having a tough one. I am having my period to begin with (sorry guys), and my hormones are making it hard to cope with reality. My AH has been on another bender. It's kind of funny that I call it that because in reality he drinks non-stop for 3 weeks until he is sick as a dog, spends a few days recovering, th...	babysteps	2	390	Mar 28, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Something dangerous I did not mention about my daughter (Preview) She cuts herself too, like I used to. Self Mutililation. Another issue that makes me want someone to untie my hands about all this. I don't have custody of her and am in no shape to be there for her 24/7.	hippietrippiechick	4	600	Mar 28, 2007 by hippietrippiechick
	got a call this morning... (Preview) Well, I was awakened by a call this morning from my A husband's new $20 an hr. job asking if I had seen him, he hasn't been to work in two days and this is their emergency contact... I had to tell them sorry don't know... I called his sponsor and he had kicked him out on Friday I guess for being...	carolinagirl	5	603	Mar 28, 2007 by TLC2
	Recent Pregnancy (Preview) I recently found out Iam pregnant. Ive been married for one year now and the marriage has been both wonderful and challenging. My husband is addicted to pot. Now, I am worried about bringing a baby into this situation. I am feeling sick to my stomach every time I smell the pot smoke now. I worry that my hus...	EarthAngel	3	522	Mar 28, 2007 by Rita G
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.