The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
You only assumed that he wouldn't press charges. You never know.
This is why when someone asks me to pray for a specific outcome, I will ask my HP that they find their HP, and that their HP takes care of them and that they find comfort in finding the HP. Because I don't know what the right outcome is.
Someone at a meeting asked that we pray that their daughter moved in with them. Someone said, "I'll pray that you are well and that your HP takes care of you if that is ok." :)
I try to do the same when I'm praying myself too but I sometimes slip. :)
Just my esh, TWYLALTR. :)
Bob
__________________
You are a perfect child of God and God and I love you just the way you are! (added by me...in that special alanon way)
I know sometimes it looks like the A's in our lives "get away" with everything, suffer no consequences, have no guilt - but after listening to many, many recovering As talk about what they were suffering on the inside I know that my perception was not exactly so.
or
it is a more of a not deserving of help from a HP? Cuz I definitely can have that feeling too sometimes. That unworthiness. Like my HP didn't answer my prayer because I wasn't good enough - when I am learning that my prayer was answered in a different way; that in turn was a much better way for me. And you are worthy. Your HP does love you & does want the best for you. Sometimes it just takes time. Which is hard.
So anyway, just wondering - again neither of this may apply to you, like I said just throwing a few things out there - Take what you like & leave the rest.
Love & Hugs, Rita
__________________
No matter what me and my God are going to be ok, even better than OK -
Actually I just meant that I figured he was meant to have the money and not me because it didn't come to me. Therefore I figure his HP knows he needs it more than I do not that I am not deserving because I definitely think I am but apparently he is meant to have it.
No I still think it is your HP looking after you. Like my HP does when I'm sick. I'm still suffering with a bit of a cold, but decided to do some laundry today. I was too exhausted to do much more, so I crawled back into bed and slept for another 5 hours. Kind of a reminder to take care of me, lest I feel worse than I do. HP works in many ways, and sometimes when we don't think that he/she is working for us, we have to flip the perspective.
Love and blessings to you and your family.
Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
__________________
It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
I am so familiar with this kind of chaos with the A. He went through something like this in November when various liens descended and he couldnt put anything in his bank. Then he wanted me to do a third party check.
He has so many lies about money. The truth is that even working super minimally as he does he should be able to pay stuff. He chooses not to work, to bellyache night and day and then to go off on working splurges. He is off on one right now claiming to work night and day to get ahead.
I know for me this kind of merrygoround is old old old after 7 years. My issue is that I am transitioning out. I think the transition out is a long one for some of us. Getting my stuff as much as I can. I know putting anything in storage with him is a nightmare. If its anything like his other debts he won't pay it or will leave it to me. The new thing is for me is that I did not step in and pa the rent. I have before many many a time. Now I don't.
I do know the A I lived with (past tense now) although in so many ways I still live with him, is incredible in his denial. He fully expects everyone to jump when he is upset and if they don't the tantrums are legion. Like all of us he has his shares of ups and downs but his ups and downs are like the pivotal points of his life there is no inbetween.
I feel for you in having to deal with this. I had to spend part of my day today dealing with the moving out stuff the A did not attend to (he did not tell the landlord I moved out). I felt drained, fed up and abused. That is the norm for me. The issue for me is what next? How do I transition, how do I move on.
