Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

This morning I felt great, and I still feel good...just not 'great'... Through out the day I've been doing my research and reading and I have come to realize that I am an enabler. I'm a provoker and sometimes a martyr. What a horrible thing to come to realize. It doesn't feel good, but at the same time,...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

((MIP Friends)) For those who have not been updated, my AH is now in a detox facility. He has been there since Monday. I left him with a generous amount of cigarettes and change. The change is all gone so I have not heard from him today. I did phone the nurse to get an update about how he's doing. The nur...

angel123 · angel123

Hope you enjoy love sharon/angel

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

...that things are going OK or at least stable. I have been working so things at home have gone a little on the back burner. My AH is really nice about me being lazy (tired from work), and even though we bicker about stupid stuff (like who directed what movie) there have been no tear stained arguments. I wa...

angel123 · angel123

Where do I begin? I had a stroke on Good Friday, I learned many things that were wrong with my health during my time in Hospital, blood pressure and other things like cloistral triglycerides ,Checking for diabetic few other things. My world has changed upside down and inside out. The doctor wanted to p...

JulieLynn · JulieLynn

When I first came into the rooms of Alanon I didn't know anything about alcoholism. It was not until I walked thru the doors of Alanon that I realized that even though it was years later that I would have to personally deal with the disease (my brother, son, and husband), I had lived with the effects of a...

Elizabeth M · Elizabeth M

My AH is 90 days sober. He is going to meetings and working a program as am I. Home life is calm and we are really communicating. He seems happier then he has in years. Very grateful for Alanon for showing me how to let go and let God. Trying to take this one day at a time but think it is a good thing to shar...

gimmpy · gimmpy

I was wondering if I wrote out a contract or expectations of my 19 year old if that would be dumb. I seem to have a difficult time setting them verbally. Someone recently told me that I need to get a back bone instead of a wish bone.. True, but easier said then done. I am always angry now. I come hame and she an...

maresie2 · maresie2

The A is playing the same old song. He is acting like it is something incredible to go up there and live with him. Like I am just waiting around to do that. I am not of course but he can't see that. Of course he can only ever see his own point of view. He's left everything to the last minute and is in a panic. ...

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

Today is a better day than yesterday...why? Because I have made the choice for it to be. Yesterday was the first time I made a choice to reach out to Al-Anon...and I am so thankful I did. After being on the boards and reading everybody's experience, it felt like a relief...like a release. I didnt make i...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

Please pray for me to have the strength to stop contacting my A. He is far too into his disease, and I have my own issues to work on. I just found out he does nothing but party over there, and will be having a lady sharing his hotel room for a few days. I give. That's it. I am sick of the BS. I want to get better. I am...

marie096 · marie096

I was very glad I started going to Al-Anon meeting. Although it was my first meeting, I could identify with the things I heard because I live them daily. It seems like a step by step process and a new outlook on life, myself, and my husband. I plan to go back. I have many unanswered questions and I feel m...

newday · newday

Ok...been here and trying to work a good program for about 3 years...recently changed my username. Spent 7 years trying to change/control/cure an A....lol. I finally made the decision to let him go. I was feeling so much better...less chaos...less drama. Along came an old friend who asked me to di...

kerry5 · kerry5

Hi everyone, Needed to get this out of my head also, as i have alot of other things in there. I need to let this one out. So i can see it here rather than continously thinking about something that doesnt matter. Today is the anniversary of my mothers death. I have grieved, and i am ok with it now. I still have i...

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

I guess since my last post, I made one mistake by calling this morning to my A at the hotel and his new girl answered. Basically, I do not need to go into all of it. I can't go back with a man who has cheated on me. That drunk just lost out to a very sweet woman who truly lovs him. I don't know him anymore. I want to k...

Diva · Diva

I am on the third day of an intestinal upset that is at least miserable. At worse, REALLY miserable. Cannot travel like this. Tomorrow is our last chance to hit the road. Hope I feel better by then. One of the many good things about being retired is that we can go when the mood strikes us, so I can put th...

babysteps · babysteps

I have asked my AH the following over and over again... A) "Please don't drink and drive." B) "Please don't take my car without asking" C) "Please say goodbye to me when you go somewhere" I ask these things of him because A) drinking & driving is dangerous and ille...

angel123 · angel123

Great slogan for me today,Hope you enjoy love Sharon/angel

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

hello, this is my very first time on this forum. i have so many different emotions inside that its just bundled up into this knot in my stomach. im not sure what even to say, but here goes... recently my fiance admitted to me that he is an A...almost 1 month ago...things have been occuring that have cause...

Leetle · Leetle

I don't know what I expected when I decided that I couldn't live with my A b/f upon his release from jail. I know I didn't think it would be easy, but I guess I was hoping it wouldn't be this hard. He is giving me the silent treatment, which in reality is helping me to keep my boundaries. I guess I am realizi...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

((Friends)) Yesterday was one of the worst days in my life. I was woken up by my AH banging on the door at 4 a.m mad as a hornet because he and his best friend had been fighting. He went to the bathroom and I could hear aluminum foil wrestling around, he was clearly intoxicated. I layed down and he left the...

serendipity · serendipity

It's been a bad week. Started last Sunday with the easter thing and I just couldn't seem to get out of my head. I went to my meetings, came here, talked to people and tried to use my tools. No, I did use my tools. But these feelings I have to work through. I put a purchase offer in on a house and I let it go. The out...

beachbaby · beachbaby

Hi all, I havent posted here in months. When I first joined al anon I had an a in my life, I am an a too. He is no longer in my life and thats a good thing. We recently shared our amends and I hoped we good just go on about our lives and maybe be friends Well, here come the expectations right? I see him all the time...

Friendofyours · Friendofyours

It really wasn't as bad as I thought and I was the least addicted to things in the room. I confesed I liked my painkillers probably a bit too much and they said to keep coming back. It was really hard for me to hear stories of crack addicts, alcholics, ect that have had years of abuse and here I am a month into t...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

so I pick up today's newspaper, and I had heard about the tragic shooting yesterday...but it was "only" two people and they were "only" in critical condition. And they WERE at one of the THE best hospitals right? And then the paper says 33 people. Dead. And I'm like, No no no no n...

Babsinbloom · Babsinbloom

Last time I posted I was on my way back to my hometown where my children and grandchildren still live. And I did go and spent eight weeks apart from my AH. The peace I felt at not being around his daily drinking was wonderful and while I was there I got the news that after four granddaughters in a row, this Gra...

angel123 · angel123

Hope you enjoy love sharon/angel After you click view image click on it again makes larger to read -- Edited by angel123 at 16:02, 2007-04-17

gardengal · gardengal

It helped me to realize that no matter what I said, did, plotted and planned to get my husband to stop drinking, I could not. Alanon made it very clear , that this program is NOT about getting the A sober, but help me regain my life, again. It made me see that I was creating my own fear of the unknown by trying t...

Terry · Terry

I am new to this. My boyfriend of 4 years "stopped drinking" 3 years ago. But he still seems to have to drink every 5 or 6 months. The thing is, he turns into what we call "the other guy" and it is tough to take. I asked him two years ago not to drink around me. Last night he started d...

serendipity · serendipity

The day before yesterday was awful inside of me. Nothing really happened. It was all inside of me, I was a mess. Trying so hard not to call my ex. Yesterday was so much better! I heard at an online meeting don't drink, just for today. And i made a decision that just for today (yesterday) i would not make any c...

Gailey · Gailey

We all need to pray for the family members of all that have been killed at Virginia Tech just over an hour ago. It is so sad.

serendipity · serendipity

The house I am moving into already has electronic fencing. Does anyone know offhand how much collars cost? I am so excited to be getting my 2 big,stinky mutts back. I have missed them so very much. Ofcourse my mom has had them with her for the past year and she is feeling a little down that her "grand...

QOD · QOD

I must be CRAZY!!!!! My AH went out to eat w/the kids and me on Friday. We had a nice time. He went back to his stepdad's later in the evening to sleep. Then Saturday he came over around 1:30 or so and spent the rest of the weekend w/us. He slept over Sat and Sun and got up and went to work this morning. He wa...

jofarc1 · jofarc1

O.K. this is just crazy......I've been with my boyfriend for 7 years now and we have had every problem there is as a result of his drinking. The thing is that when we would go out together we would have a lot of fun. Our problems are when he would go drink on his own with his friends (without me). Some thin...

miller7 · miller7

Hi all, I am new to this, so "bear" w/ me. I have a very close friend who is in recovery and on one level we are as close as 2 people can be, closer than our significant others would like, (now our divorced spouses) We have known each other for 10 years and we are each others greatest confidants....

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello Friends))) Just wanted to say thank you to each of you who so compassionately responded. Its been sometime for me to get back online. I am taking care of myself and my kids, and trying to remain calm. My AH slept most of the day Saturday. The kids and I stayed at my brother's that night. I did...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

How many times have **YOU** been the lamp on the couch? The solution SO obvious--yet the action not taken?

maresie2 · maresie2

It seems to me there is a pattern with the A's agitation and chaos. He sets up a crisis, acts out then acts normal. Right now he is in this huge agitation with having to move (in chaos) and drama. I don't really see how he will make it where he is going. He has few contacts. He has no support system and he has...

nmike · nmike

I went to an open AA meeting tonight. We listened to a speaker tape. After the speaker we spoke informally. We said that if only that shooter at the college had heard of a 12 step program or recovery or went to meetings maybe he could have dissipated some of his anger and frustration. We felt that the 12 s...

snapdragon · snapdragon

I'm new here. I've been married for five years now - together for about seven. When we first started dating, we pretty much binge drank together - I didn't drink before I started dating him but as soon as I started dating him I started (again). During my youth, I had binge drank but gave that up when I wa...

Maria123 · Maria123

I love it, not really at times, when I think (think being the operative word) that I have my life in order. They say that when you think God doesn't have a sense of humor, tell him your plan.

I thought I didn't need to read One Day At A Time in Alanon anymore as I don't live with an active A and lo and...

Lani · Lani

Overwhelmed? "Life does not happen to us, it happens from us." -- Mike Wickett Are you easily overwhelmed? If so, answer this question in your journal: While growing up, what did you experience too much of? Experiencing too much of something leads to feelings of overwhelm. When were you...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((Family))))), Okay here I am snowed in because of the noreaster and hubby and I got to talking. We are both very stubborn and tenacious people. I like to blame it on me being a Taurus! But it got me thinking about recovery. When an A is ative they will go to any means to get their fix. They are relen...

serendipity · serendipity

I went for it! I bought the house! I have taken all the steps so far including calling my landlady and apoplgizing for the message I left yesterday if I sounded snotty. That was the hardest. She agreed to let me stay till June 1st which is awsome. The plan is to be closed by end of May. Wow things move fast w...

wp · wp

Hi Debs, I got a response from my friend today and will be looking for you tonight. You might want to consider receiving her email from me. mswp aka pw

HEARTBROKEN IN NJ · HEARTBROKEN IN NJ

Thank you for clarifying that non-alcoholics attend AA meetings. Do alcoholics attend Alanon meetings also? Sorry if I sound dumb, but as I have said, this is all new to me. Just trying to get an understanding of who goes where.

marie096 · marie096

I am new to this forum. My husband is a recovering addict and alcoholic. He has just returned from rehab. It is driving me crazy because he wants the car to go and apply for a job. It seems like he hasn't taken the time to "look around" at home it's all I got, I got.

kissers · kissers

I posted a message not long ago about someone I had talked to for a year and wound up becoming physically intimate. He told me he loved me then after I would not let up until I got the truth he told me he didn't know what love is. He lied to me. I should have known he was an A. The truth came out shortly after that...

sissy · sissy

I am having trouble with enabling behavior and taking care of myself. Beside the AH in my life. I have dad that needs 24/7 care and grandmother. It is so hard to have time for myself. Marsha

sash · sash

My husband has been sober now for about three weeks. I know this is very early, but he is doing really well. This week he started his out-patient rehab and he attends AA meetings every night. Yesterday was a hectic day (as most of my days are). I worked all day, he didn't have rehab yesterday so he was h...

gardengal · gardengal

This a question which comes very hard to us in Alanon. Most of us are too busy worrying about the A taking on "his/her" responsibilities or doing the thinking for them or trying to think for them. We put ourselves on the backburner as we continually obsess about another. Getting up in the mo...

Gailey · Gailey

I have watched the first of a four part series on addiction. It was an HBO documentary....but I don't have HBO. I am getting 1 dvd at a time through Netflix. Anyway, I found the first one very interesting and informative. It goes into the fact that A'ism is a brain disease. It also talks alot about 12 step r...

Maria123 · Maria123

So often people are confused about what detachment means and today I read from Hope for Today a few simple words about detachment that will help me. "Detach from my problem and attach, instead, to my Higher Power." That's simple. I can do that.

HEARTBROKEN IN NJ · HEARTBROKEN IN NJ

Over the weekend it was suggested to me that I attend an actual AA meeting. Although I am extremely leary to do so, I'm going to attend one tonight. I'm a very curious woman and these meetings have left me very curious. Especially since when my relationship with my A was active, he would always say tha...

Diva · Diva

We are going to visit friends in Utah and will be gone 9 days. Leaving tomorrow early morning. I will keep all of you close in my thoughts and prayers as always. Do something good for yourselves. With love to all, Diva

ally · ally

(((((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))) I will be gone for a week. I am going on holiday tomorrow, and will not be here or in the chatroom.. Just incase you think I have done a runner...lol Looking forward to my holiday, a new adventure for me!!! Flying to France, have never been up in the air before..(w...

pls · pls

Ok. So I am new here, for about 2 months now. I am so very hard trying to work my program, but this weekend, I feel like everything keeps setting me back. A little history first. I live next door to my A, we have been separated for 8 months now. He feels he "is old enough to decide if he wants to drink...

HEARTBROKEN IN NJ · HEARTBROKEN IN NJ

Dating an alcoholic is more like having a dependent than a partner. This is soooo true!!!

hippietrippiechick · hippietrippiechick

I was crying like crazy last night, because I guess I was letting My A get the best of me. He has women friends that come visit him. My dad says as a man, from what I told him, Charlie is getting his whipped somewhere else. Even when the time came (after 6 weeks of waiting), we still haven't had sex. I ha...

maresie2 · maresie2

2 years ago when I first came on board here the A pulled a huge crisis number. he is good at that. He makes a huge crisis then he leaves me with the mess and I am so disorientated by that and desperate I don't get to look at what is going on. This latest crisis with setting up the eviction (after all what else i...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Enabler, Co-dependent & Detachment (Preview) This morning I felt great, and I still feel good...just not 'great'... Through out the day I've been doing my research and reading and I have come to realize that I am an enabler. I'm a provoker and sometimes a martyr. What a horrible thing to come to realize. It doesn't feel good, but at the same time,...	boricuaGA	3	1780	Apr 18, 2007 by twinmom2
	Update (Preview) ((MIP Friends)) For those who have not been updated, my AH is now in a detox facility. He has been there since Monday. I left him with a generous amount of cigarettes and change. The change is all gone so I have not heard from him today. I did phone the nurse to get an update about how he's doing. The nur...	twinmom2	3	309	Apr 18, 2007 by rtexas
	Forum (Preview) Hope you enjoy love sharon/angel	angel123	1	333	Apr 18, 2007 by Sunny2007
	I was just about to say (Preview) ...that things are going OK or at least stable. I have been working so things at home have gone a little on the back burner. My AH is really nice about me being lazy (tired from work), and even though we bicker about stupid stuff (like who directed what movie) there have been no tear stained arguments. I wa...	RainyJamie	6	505	Apr 18, 2007 by RainyJamie
	Hope (Preview) Where do I begin? I had a stroke on Good Friday, I learned many things that were wrong with my health during my time in Hospital, blood pressure and other things like cloistral triglycerides ,Checking for diabetic few other things. My world has changed upside down and inside out. The doctor wanted to p...	angel123	7	854	Apr 18, 2007 by Sunny2007
	Lessons I've learned from an alcoholic (Preview) When I first came into the rooms of Alanon I didn't know anything about alcoholism. It was not until I walked thru the doors of Alanon that I realized that even though it was years later that I would have to personally deal with the disease (my brother, son, and husband), I had lived with the effects of a...	JulieLynn	3	584	Apr 18, 2007 by hudsond
	miracles do happen (Preview) My AH is 90 days sober. He is going to meetings and working a program as am I. Home life is calm and we are really communicating. He seems happier then he has in years. Very grateful for Alanon for showing me how to let go and let God. Trying to take this one day at a time but think it is a good thing to shar...	Elizabeth M	10	561	Apr 18, 2007 by hersh
	question about boundries... (Preview) I was wondering if I wrote out a contract or expectations of my 19 year old if that would be dumb. I seem to have a difficult time setting them verbally. Someone recently told me that I need to get a back bone instead of a wish bone.. True, but easier said then done. I am always angry now. I come hame and she an...	gimmpy	8	616	Apr 18, 2007 by Christy
	Playing the same old song but hearing the lyrics (Preview) The A is playing the same old song. He is acting like it is something incredible to go up there and live with him. Like I am just waiting around to do that. I am not of course but he can't see that. Of course he can only ever see his own point of view. He's left everything to the last minute and is in a panic. ...	maresie2	3	514	Apr 18, 2007 by aunitedway
	Today is a better day (Preview) Today is a better day than yesterday...why? Because I have made the choice for it to be. Yesterday was the first time I made a choice to reach out to Al-Anon...and I am so thankful I did. After being on the boards and reading everybody's experience, it felt like a relief...like a release. I didnt make i...	boricuaGA	2	414	Apr 18, 2007 by Gailey
	O.K. enough pain. I give. I have had it want my own life back (Preview) Please pray for me to have the strength to stop contacting my A. He is far too into his disease, and I have my own issues to work on. I just found out he does nothing but party over there, and will be having a lady sharing his hotel room for a few days. I give. That's it. I am sick of the BS. I want to get better. I am...	hippietrippiechick	9	399	Apr 18, 2007 by hippietrippiechick
	My first meeting (Preview) I was very glad I started going to Al-Anon meeting. Although it was my first meeting, I could identify with the things I heard because I live them daily. It seems like a step by step process and a new outlook on life, myself, and my husband. I plan to go back. I have many unanswered questions and I feel m...	marie096	5	372	Apr 18, 2007 by carosie
	sad...again...sucked in...again (Preview) Ok...been here and trying to work a good program for about 3 years...recently changed my username. Spent 7 years trying to change/control/cure an A....lol. I finally made the decision to let him go. I was feeling so much better...less chaos...less drama. Along came an old friend who asked me to di...	newday	2	531	Apr 18, 2007 by ShelBell
	Anniversary of Mothers death (Preview) Hi everyone, Needed to get this out of my head also, as i have alot of other things in there. I need to let this one out. So i can see it here rather than continously thinking about something that doesnt matter. Today is the anniversary of my mothers death. I have grieved, and i am ok with it now. I still have i...	kerry5	8	668	Apr 18, 2007 by danz123
	How do I begin? (Preview) I guess since my last post, I made one mistake by calling this morning to my A at the hotel and his new girl answered. Basically, I do not need to go into all of it. I can't go back with a man who has cheated on me. That drunk just lost out to a very sweet woman who truly lovs him. I don't know him anymore. I want to k...	hippietrippiechick	4	330	Apr 18, 2007 by annmarie
	Vacation probably cancelled! (Preview) I am on the third day of an intestinal upset that is at least miserable. At worse, REALLY miserable. Cannot travel like this. Tomorrow is our last chance to hit the road. Hope I feel better by then. One of the many good things about being retired is that we can go when the mood strikes us, so I can put th...	Diva	9	495	Apr 17, 2007 by wp
	Turned negative controlling behavior into positive boundary setting (Preview) I have asked my AH the following over and over again... A) "Please don't drink and drive." B) "Please don't take my car without asking" C) "Please say goodbye to me when you go somewhere" I ask these things of him because A) drinking & driving is dangerous and ille...	babysteps	2	1126	Apr 17, 2007 by Leetle
	This to Shall Pass (Preview) Great slogan for me today,Hope you enjoy love Sharon/angel	angel123	3	5839	Apr 17, 2007 by carolena
	I feel so lost and dont know what to do (Preview) hello, this is my very first time on this forum. i have so many different emotions inside that its just bundled up into this knot in my stomach. im not sure what even to say, but here goes... recently my fiance admitted to me that he is an A...almost 1 month ago...things have been occuring that have cause...	boricuaGA	5	548	Apr 17, 2007 by maresie2
	Feeling Numb (Preview) I don't know what I expected when I decided that I couldn't live with my A b/f upon his release from jail. I know I didn't think it would be easy, but I guess I was hoping it wouldn't be this hard. He is giving me the silent treatment, which in reality is helping me to keep my boundaries. I guess I am realizi...	Leetle	3	426	Apr 17, 2007 by carolena
	AH crashed my car in a drunken stupor (Preview) ((Friends)) Yesterday was one of the worst days in my life. I was woken up by my AH banging on the door at 4 a.m mad as a hornet because he and his best friend had been fighting. He went to the bathroom and I could hear aluminum foil wrestling around, he was clearly intoxicated. I layed down and he left the...	twinmom2	18	581	Apr 17, 2007 by carolena
	freakin out (Preview) It's been a bad week. Started last Sunday with the easter thing and I just couldn't seem to get out of my head. I went to my meetings, came here, talked to people and tried to use my tools. No, I did use my tools. But these feelings I have to work through. I put a purchase offer in on a house and I let it go. The out...	serendipity	5	506	Apr 17, 2007 by carolena
	Unrealistic to expect friendship? (Preview) Hi all, I havent posted here in months. When I first joined al anon I had an a in my life, I am an a too. He is no longer in my life and thats a good thing. We recently shared our amends and I hoped we good just go on about our lives and maybe be friends Well, here come the expectations right? I see him all the time...	beachbaby	6	543	Apr 17, 2007 by beachbaby
	I went to an addiction meeting! (Preview) It really wasn't as bad as I thought and I was the least addicted to things in the room. I confesed I liked my painkillers probably a bit too much and they said to keep coming back. It was really hard for me to hear stories of crack addicts, alcholics, ect that have had years of abuse and here I am a month into t...	Friendofyours	4	553	Apr 17, 2007 by carolena
	What DO you say? (Preview) so I pick up today's newspaper, and I had heard about the tragic shooting yesterday...but it was "only" two people and they were "only" in critical condition. And they WERE at one of the THE best hospitals right? And then the paper says 33 people. Dead. And I'm like, No no no no n...	Tiger2006	2	532	Apr 17, 2007 by Karilynn
	An update from Wilted who is now Babsinbloom... (Preview) Last time I posted I was on my way back to my hometown where my children and grandchildren still live. And I did go and spent eight weeks apart from my AH. The peace I felt at not being around his daily drinking was wonderful and while I was there I got the news that after four granddaughters in a row, this Gra...	Babsinbloom	3	307	Apr 17, 2007 by carolena
	Forum (Preview) Hope you enjoy love sharon/angel After you click view image click on it again makes larger to read -- Edited by angel123 at 16:02, 2007-04-17	angel123	0	268	Apr 17, 2007 by angel123
	How did Alanon redefine your life? (Preview) It helped me to realize that no matter what I said, did, plotted and planned to get my husband to stop drinking, I could not. Alanon made it very clear , that this program is NOT about getting the A sober, but help me regain my life, again. It made me see that I was creating my own fear of the unknown by trying t...	gardengal	4	620	Apr 17, 2007 by Kim65
	Dealing with an intermittent drinker (Preview) I am new to this. My boyfriend of 4 years "stopped drinking" 3 years ago. But he still seems to have to drink every 5 or 6 months. The thing is, he turns into what we call "the other guy" and it is tough to take. I asked him two years ago not to drink around me. Last night he started d...	Terry	6	1085	Apr 17, 2007 by Terry
	just for today (Preview) The day before yesterday was awful inside of me. Nothing really happened. It was all inside of me, I was a mess. Trying so hard not to call my ex. Yesterday was so much better! I heard at an online meeting don't drink, just for today. And i made a decision that just for today (yesterday) i would not make any c...	serendipity	5	479	Apr 17, 2007 by marie096
	something horrible just happened (Preview) We all need to pray for the family members of all that have been killed at Virginia Tech just over an hour ago. It is so sad.	Gailey	12	578	Apr 17, 2007 by Diva
	another quick ? for my animal lover friends (Preview) The house I am moving into already has electronic fencing. Does anyone know offhand how much collars cost? I am so excited to be getting my 2 big,stinky mutts back. I have missed them so very much. Ofcourse my mom has had them with her for the past year and she is feeling a little down that her "grand...	serendipity	2	275	Apr 17, 2007 by Diva
	We had a WONDERFUL weekend!! (Preview) I must be CRAZY!!!!! My AH went out to eat w/the kids and me on Friday. We had a nice time. He went back to his stepdad's later in the evening to sleep. Then Saturday he came over around 1:30 or so and spent the rest of the weekend w/us. He slept over Sat and Sun and got up and went to work this morning. He wa...	QOD	7	523	Apr 17, 2007 by QOD
	He stopped drinking now I'm "wishing" I was out on a Sat. night (Preview) O.K. this is just crazy......I've been with my boyfriend for 7 years now and we have had every problem there is as a result of his drinking. The thing is that when we would go out together we would have a lot of fun. Our problems are when he would go drink on his own with his friends (without me). Some thin...	jofarc1	5	501	Apr 17, 2007 by jofarc1
	in and out of contact (Preview) Hi all, I am new to this, so "bear" w/ me. I have a very close friend who is in recovery and on one level we are as close as 2 people can be, closer than our significant others would like, (now our divorced spouses) We have known each other for 10 years and we are each others greatest confidants....	miller7	6	466	Apr 17, 2007 by newday
	The drama continues.... (Preview) (((Hello Friends))) Just wanted to say thank you to each of you who so compassionately responded. Its been sometime for me to get back online. I am taking care of myself and my kids, and trying to remain calm. My AH slept most of the day Saturday. The kids and I stayed at my brother's that night. I did...	twinmom2	11	522	Apr 17, 2007 by sweetums
	Something to think about, courtesy of the comic pages (Preview) How many times have YOU been the lamp on the couch? The solution SO obvious--yet the action not taken?	Tiger2006	3	323	Apr 17, 2007 by annmarie
	waiting .... but with sanity rather than immersed in fear (Preview) It seems to me there is a pattern with the A's agitation and chaos. He sets up a crisis, acts out then acts normal. Right now he is in this huge agitation with having to move (in chaos) and drama. I don't really see how he will make it where he is going. He has few contacts. He has no support system and he has...	maresie2	2	472	Apr 17, 2007 by Barbs45
	If only... (Preview) I went to an open AA meeting tonight. We listened to a speaker tape. After the speaker we spoke informally. We said that if only that shooter at the college had heard of a 12 step program or recovery or went to meetings maybe he could have dissipated some of his anger and frustration. We felt that the 12 s...	nmike	1	303	Apr 17, 2007 by CJ
	First Post and I've had all I can take...I think. (Preview) I'm new here. I've been married for five years now - together for about seven. When we first started dating, we pretty much binge drank together - I didn't drink before I started dating him but as soon as I started dating him I started (again). During my youth, I had binge drank but gave that up when I wa...	snapdragon	5	835	Apr 16, 2007 by maresie2
	Letting Go (Preview) I love it, not really at times, when I think (think being the operative word) that I have my life in order. They say that when you think God doesn't have a sense of humor, tell him your plan. I thought I didn't need to read One Day At A Time in Alanon anymore as I don't live with an active A and lo and...	Maria123	1	434	Apr 16, 2007 by Leetle
	OVERWHELMED? quotes (Preview) Overwhelmed? "Life does not happen to us, it happens from us." -- Mike Wickett Are you easily overwhelmed? If so, answer this question in your journal: While growing up, what did you experience too much of? Experiencing too much of something leads to feelings of overwhelm. When were you...	Lani	1	9159	Apr 16, 2007 by Sunny2007
	Stubborness: a good thing (Preview) (((((((Family))))), Okay here I am snowed in because of the noreaster and hubby and I got to talking. We are both very stubborn and tenacious people. I like to blame it on me being a Taurus! But it got me thinking about recovery. When an A is ative they will go to any means to get their fix. They are relen...	Karilynn	3	393	Apr 16, 2007 by serenity62
	O.K. I did it!!!! (Preview) I went for it! I bought the house! I have taken all the steps so far including calling my landlady and apoplgizing for the message I left yesterday if I sounded snotty. That was the hardest. She agreed to let me stay till June 1st which is awsome. The plan is to be closed by end of May. Wow things move fast w...	serendipity	9	380	Apr 16, 2007 by wp
	message for Debs (Preview) Hi Debs, I got a response from my friend today and will be looking for you tonight. You might want to consider receiving her email from me. mswp aka pw	wp	0	354	Apr 16, 2007 by wp
	Clarification needed (Preview) Thank you for clarifying that non-alcoholics attend AA meetings. Do alcoholics attend Alanon meetings also? Sorry if I sound dumb, but as I have said, this is all new to me. Just trying to get an understanding of who goes where.	HEARTBROKEN IN NJ	3	389	Apr 16, 2007 by rtexas
	Need Help (Preview) I am new to this forum. My husband is a recovering addict and alcoholic. He has just returned from rehab. It is driving me crazy because he wants the car to go and apply for a job. It seems like he hasn't taken the time to "look around" at home it's all I got, I got.	marie096	5	429	Apr 16, 2007 by marie096
	I Should Have Known!!! (Preview) I posted a message not long ago about someone I had talked to for a year and wound up becoming physically intimate. He told me he loved me then after I would not let up until I got the truth he told me he didn't know what love is. He lied to me. I should have known he was an A. The truth came out shortly after that...	kissers	7	494	Apr 16, 2007 by hudsond
	Taking care of myself. (Preview) I am having trouble with enabling behavior and taking care of myself. Beside the AH in my life. I have dad that needs 24/7 care and grandmother. It is so hard to have time for myself. Marsha	sissy	5	508	Apr 16, 2007 by sissy
	Am I wrong (Preview) My husband has been sober now for about three weeks. I know this is very early, but he is doing really well. This week he started his out-patient rehab and he attends AA meetings every night. Yesterday was a hectic day (as most of my days are). I worked all day, he didn't have rehab yesterday so he was h...	sash	26	1549	Apr 16, 2007 by marie096
	"Tough question"-- How do you feel about yourself today? (Preview) This a question which comes very hard to us in Alanon. Most of us are too busy worrying about the A taking on "his/her" responsibilities or doing the thinking for them or trying to think for them. We put ourselves on the backburner as we continually obsess about another. Getting up in the mo...	gardengal	8	1416	Apr 16, 2007 by barisax
	ADDICTION: why can't they just stop? (Preview) I have watched the first of a four part series on addiction. It was an HBO documentary....but I don't have HBO. I am getting 1 dvd at a time through Netflix. Anyway, I found the first one very interesting and informative. It goes into the fact that A'ism is a brain disease. It also talks alot about 12 step r...	Gailey	2	470	Apr 16, 2007 by hudsond
	simple words about detachment (Preview) So often people are confused about what detachment means and today I read from Hope for Today a few simple words about detachment that will help me. "Detach from my problem and attach, instead, to my Higher Power." That's simple. I can do that.	Maria123	4	370	Apr 16, 2007 by weggie
	Dreading tonight (Preview) Over the weekend it was suggested to me that I attend an actual AA meeting. Although I am extremely leary to do so, I'm going to attend one tonight. I'm a very curious woman and these meetings have left me very curious. Especially since when my relationship with my A was active, he would always say tha...	HEARTBROKEN IN NJ	2	595	Apr 16, 2007 by babysteps
	You'll all have a short break from dealing with Diva... (Preview) We are going to visit friends in Utah and will be gone 9 days. Leaving tomorrow early morning. I will keep all of you close in my thoughts and prayers as always. Do something good for yourselves. With love to all, Diva	Diva	11	557	Apr 16, 2007 by maire rua
	ALLY WILL BE AWAY FOR A WEEK (Preview) (((((((((((((((((Guys))))))))))))))) I will be gone for a week. I am going on holiday tomorrow, and will not be here or in the chatroom.. Just incase you think I have done a runner...lol Looking forward to my holiday, a new adventure for me!!! Flying to France, have never been up in the air before..(w...	ally	11	374	Apr 15, 2007 by wp
	My first time to vent. HELP (Preview) Ok. So I am new here, for about 2 months now. I am so very hard trying to work my program, but this weekend, I feel like everything keeps setting me back. A little history first. I live next door to my A, we have been separated for 8 months now. He feels he "is old enough to decide if he wants to drink...	pls	6	547	Apr 15, 2007 by wp
	Something I heard last night that sums it up (Preview) Dating an alcoholic is more like having a dependent than a partner. This is soooo true!!!	HEARTBROKEN IN NJ	4	397	Apr 15, 2007 by lilms
	need help, heart is breaking (Preview) I was crying like crazy last night, because I guess I was letting My A get the best of me. He has women friends that come visit him. My dad says as a man, from what I told him, Charlie is getting his whipped somewhere else. Even when the time came (after 6 weeks of waiting), we still haven't had sex. I ha...	hippietrippiechick	9	911	Apr 15, 2007 by hippietrippiechick
	believing the lies (Preview) 2 years ago when I first came on board here the A pulled a huge crisis number. he is good at that. He makes a huge crisis then he leaves me with the mess and I am so disorientated by that and desperate I don't get to look at what is going on. This latest crisis with setting up the eviction (after all what else i...	maresie2	2	432	Apr 15, 2007 by TLC2
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.