Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

lin0606 · lin0606

First, I'd like to say thanks to everyone who has been so supportive. You're right, thinking of myself as the base that everyone else can lean on is bound to fail - I'll collapse, and no one will be well off. It's not accurate anyway - already there are indications that MY ideas of what everybody needs,...

englishrose · englishrose

I went to my first meeting last night. I was scared - terrified in fact. My A knew I was going - she was so proud of me. Everyone at the meeting was so warm and wonderful, I sat like a rabbit caught in the headlights. But, at the end of the meeting, a lovely lady (M) handed me her phone number and told me to call he...

Christy · Christy

Hi .. I'd like to share a story about my neighbor. Her daughter (30 yrs old) is a heroin addict, an addict is an addict be it alcohol or drugs. It's all the same. She blames her mother for her addiction. The Mother has never sought any help for herself. Mom accepts the blame the daughter dishes out b...

Christy · Christy

I wrote this poem quite a while before I got sick enough to seek help. I look back and see just how far down the black hole I had fallen. Thank Heaven I went to Alanon. THE BOOK The story never changes and the chapters never end. I want to close this book, so my heart can mend. The pages turn and years go...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Friends))) Thank you all for the comforting words the other night. I was in a pretty low spot and just needed to get it out. Yesterday was a much better day. My son is feeling better too and finally got to enjoy his TMNT cake after dinner. We went to the detox center yesterday evening to see AH. The...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

Does anyone know of a website that lists hotlines? I needed one yesterday and floundered around way too long for my own sanity trying to find one. I didn't need it for myself but for someone who had called me seeking help. I did finally find what I wanted but it would have been very nice to have it at hand w...

daisygrl4 · daisygrl4

Ok...so it's been a while since I've been on. I'm usually on here talking about my A who is my b/f. He's been living in an Oxford house now for 2 months and has been sober for 3 1/2! I am very happy but also taking things one day at a time. So we'll see....I'm actually writing about another A. My father. ...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Last Wed. I got an email from my mother in law that my AH was in a terrible car accident and has a punctured lung, and back and leg injuries. He refused to tell her where he is and asked her not to tell me about the accident. She hasn't heard from him in almost a week. I called a few local hospitals but didn't...

ally · ally

((((((((((((YO))))))))))))))) You will never believe what I done...... I am scared of heights right.....AND... I went up in a cable car, It took 6 mins and It went way way up on top of the mountains......OMG it was awesome..lol I came back down and I said to all my party....can I do that again ....hahah...

Diva · Diva

I have an ongoing problem with "suggestions" given to parents of addicted children. They are, without exception, told that they are enablers, and they must say "No" now. They must do nothing for the child. Don't help them in any way. Don't get them out of jail, don't feed th...

englishrose · englishrose

I found this site a few days ago - I was in a really tough place and desperately needed someone to talk to. Yesterday I went into the chat room - I was tearful and over-emotional after a very rough night. Thank you to everyone that was around and just listened to me. I know I left abruptly - I'm so sorry about t...

confused · confused

I have been in this place before, and am sure I will be in it again. I do not know why I have such a difficult time with not knowing. Currently my AH is "clean and sober" but I have serious doubts. I know he is not attending meetings or working a program. History tells me that the emotional/m...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((MIP Friends))) We had a great birthday party for the boys today. One of my son's started feeling ill almost as soon as we arrived at the park. He started feeling sick to his stomach and running fever and chills. Poor little guy. He did his best to enjoy it. All my family and AH's family was there, I...

nmike · nmike

Hi Alanoners, At least now I know that I always have a place to go when I don't know what to do or say. Go directly to Alanon. I saw my AHsober today. I hadn't seen him in almost 2 months although we have talked on the phone about once a week. He said now we really need to talk about finances because we had to pa...

david62 · david62

Hey ((((Family)))) Did you ever have one of those times when something really cool happens to you, and you are looking around for someone you know to tell, and no one is there!? Well dat just happened to me, and I'm like .... looking around....who can I call...mmmmm.. I know I'll share with my family of c...

atalossmom · atalossmom

I have been reading this message board for a few months now - off and on - looking for comments from parents and haven't seen any so far. Following advice from counselors, we have stopped loaning/giving money, refused return to our home until successful completion of rehab, and tried not to take the t...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Last night I had this great conversation with my 12 yo daughter about her dad. She has to write a short essay on obstacles she has overcome and chose to talk about her stepfather's alcoholism. It's amazing how much you really don't know that went on when you were gone, out of town, out of the room, etc. ...

Sunny2007 · Sunny2007

Hi Everyone, I made it to do the preparation for my 2 neurological tests Thursday, which included being awake for 24 hours before the first test. Won't know results till sometime next week, but dr. was doing these "just to be sure" and she doesn't expect to find anything wrong. Slept most o...

TLM · TLM

Today, I am feeling like I could easily "go there" so, I am posting my gratitude list. Today I am grateful that I live in a beautiful small town. I am grateful that spring is here and the trees are starting to leaf out I am grateful that I have my health I am grateful that I have found this board an...

melamom815 · melamom815

Had a doctor's appointment yesterday. Baby and I are in great health and the baby is growing wonderfully. I am almost back up to my pre-pregnancy weight after losing nearly 15 pounds in the first trimester. Biggest news.....Doctor is almost positive that I am having a girl! That will make it 3 g...

lin0606 · lin0606

Found out a few days ago that my husband has pancreatic cancer. I am trying to stay optimistic until we have seen the oncologist (next week) and started some treatment, but the chances are pretty good that he is dying. This is a famously bad cancer, and it has already spread. I'm finding that there are...

serendipity · serendipity

So, my ex ah is seeing someone new. A new woman to enable him. The last convo I had with him which was Wednesday I lost it. I was sucked into the insanity. I had asked him if he signed the divorce papers and he said yes. Well, I call my lawyer daily and he never returns my calls. This has been going on for a year wi...

TLM · TLM

Last night in a meeting someone was talking about a God Box, which reminded me... I used to use what I referred to as a God Can (I can't, but God CAN). I figured I still had it kicking around somewhere, and sure enough, on a shelf in my closet was my God Can. So I opened it up and looked inside... I was amazed a...

Leetle · Leetle

This has been the first week of the rest of my life. I have set clear boundaries with my A ex b/f. He is keeping to most of them. I have been working through the chaos he has tried to lay at my feet. Mainly by stepping over it and moving on (of course, that is after I have a freak out in my head and with my poor...

Angel1 · Angel1

hi my AH is 30 days sober tomorrow. He went 68 days sober out of rehab before relapsing so this is not a HUGE milestone except he is going to AA and working the steps this time. My issue....When he is drunk he is affectionate, remorseful, tells me he loves me, misses me (we have been seperated since August)...

maresie2 · maresie2

In his usual dramatic fashion the A claims to be leaving today. He wanted me to pack for him last night. I did not as I have to work today. He has now switched his answering machine off so I don't know whether he has left or not. He's left no forwarding address and I don't know when he starts work or anythin...

sash · sash

How do you let go of the anger? I attended a family counseling group last night at my husband's out-patient rehab. At first I told them that things between us has been about 75% better. The groups topic last night was communication. As the session went on, I realized that I kept my anger about th...

ally · ally

(((((((((((ROOMIES)))))))))))))))) Yo, Having a wonderful time.....Went on the plane...was awesome.....Sunshine most days..Had a thunderstorm one night...OMG it was horrendous.. Went out for a walk on my own, got lost..lol I have been getting so much from here.. Watching all the sick in Lour...

newday · newday

I found this on the AA board and it has made my day and possibly life brighter. Thanks Phil... Kicky Come Here---Go Away.. As long as we have not healed our childhood wounds then there are a lot more than two people involved in our relationships. There may only be two people in the room - but the room is al...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Words to Consider The decisive question for man is: Is he related to something infinite or not? That is the telling question of life. --Carl Jung Let the Power Work through You The times that life works best are when we get out of the way and let the power work through us. The writer says of an inspired shor...

hersh · hersh

(((Hi Everyone)))) Haven't been here in a while, my life has been busy busy... but just wanted to let you all know that this board is a lifesaver. This time last year, I was a scared, horrified, panic-stricken person who wanted nothing but to dwell on my horrible life and the possibility that I would hav...

simplyme · simplyme

Hey guys. I'm new around here and I'm so glad you are all here. I went to my first al-anon meeting last night, but I've been to CODA in the past so I'm not a stranger to the steps or the healing. I was raised by an A father and later had a very intense 3 year relationship with A who I loved dearly but who finally...

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

A fiance sends me a text message saying: "FYI - I MIGHT have 2 go 2 work tomorrow morn - will let u know. But afterwards @ 4pm, Q is pickin me up 2 go and get sum shoes and do sum other stuff. Jus fyi. Tryin 2 communicate" That selfish BASTARD! He has not picked our son up ONCE this week from the si...

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

Hi everybody, Well, today I think I have been more 'confused' and had the most mixture of feelings than I have since I started Al-anon. I'm assuming this is normal. Last night A fiance got home. He looked like crap. I just look into his eyes and see despair, sadness, hurt, pain. I had a talk with him an...

cac · cac

Just wanted to post an update on my situation. My husband admitted himself into rehab on Friday night. He is there and seems to be doing well. His counselor and RN said that he is motivated and has a positive attitude. They keep him very busy with meetings, lectures, group and individual therapy. ...

TLM · TLM

I lost it! Two nights ago it was my mothers birthday, and my AH decided to drink some shots of whisky before going out to dinner with the family. Did I detach with love or even with a hatchet? Not even close. I went off. I started slamming doors and yelling at him about how sick I am of him letting me down...

Becky1 · Becky1

Sat. and Sun. were pretty good days for my AH and I. Went to dinner Sat. nite at a non-alcohol restaurant, went out to a fast food breakfast Sun. and to look at new Plasma TV's ( I get a discount where I work, plus $$$ to spend towards it!) Got home, went over to friend's house with him to watch race, took munc...

Kim65 · Kim65

I have been STRUGGLING daily with a depressed feeling for a couple of weeks, low energy, obsessing in the same old way about the A, feeling like I'm in a stuffy cotton bag. Not long ago I made a breakthrough in terms of detatchment and felt some blessed peace . . . but since I threw a mega temper tantrum at t...

everydayjane · everydayjane

This is my first time on this website. I hope that it helps, i feel like I'm all alone in this and it's hard to talk about. I have never fully told this story to anyone and I hope that I'm not really the only one in the world that feels like this. So here is my story: My husband realized that he was an alcoholi...

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

Last night I read the first chapter in Melody Beattie's Codependents' Guide To The Twelve Steps. I read Psalm 21 and the Lord put this poem in my heart. Lift me up Lord and clear my heavy mind Release me from this bondage and take away my cries my heart is full of anger consumed with resentment and hate and...

gimmpy · gimmpy

I once again told my daughter that there's no drinking, drugs, boy friends spending the night, or foul mouth garbage, etc. I said I will call the police if needed. The breaker was that her boy friend is not welcomed here, especially spending the night. She said we were f.... ing pissing her off and sh...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, I was just thinking.....when I was with myA I used to post my crisis situations on this board and got great help from you all. This helped me through so much. We sperated four months ago. He's still drinking himself to death, not doing very well. He says he knows the disease will take him. Sad...

debilyn · debilyn

ver are yee my dahling??? love,debilyn

HEARTBROKEN IN NJ · HEARTBROKEN IN NJ

First, I want to thank everyone on this board who posts. I have learned so much from you all. I have learned that my "feelings" are quite normal and that the most important thing I can do is not continuously worry about my ex A b/f, but instead to worry about myself and MY recovery from all I'v...

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

Hello everybody, Today I woke up with such a high hope in my heart. Yesterday I went to the bookstore and picked up Melody Beattie's Codeependents Guide To The Twelve Steps. WOW...what an awesome book filled with allowing you to see the revelations that have been there all along. I read the first cha...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

The amount of anger and rage I have for my AH today could probably power the entire city. Just came back from the body shop, this A... hole caused 5K worth of damage to my van. Not to mention I have to sell my home, and probably go through 7 years of bad credit because I can't pay on my credit card debt right n...

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

I am not certain when i can make it to an al-anon meeting...i have a young son and have not found a meeting in my area with babysitting. in the mean time i need to get a book to help me deal with this and better myself. what ive learned so far is that i NEED to detach your suggestions are appreciated...

Gailey · Gailey

I am not having a very good morning. I am having a hard time keeping the focus on me. A son seemed to be doing very well lately (still drinking but not having any problems that I know of). This morning seems to be a not so good morning for him. I did not ask questions but now I find myself projecting alot. I just...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Well, I just got back from my vacation in Alabama with the 3 kids (driving)...and I was sick when I left and even sicker when I got home. Thought I was going to die on Sunday and went to the dr. on Monday. Looks like I might have pneumonia and am on serious antibiotics. My home computer has a terrible viru...

david62 · david62

Happy April 17th! (((((((((((Family))))))))))))) Did that title get your attention??? He he he Today is my 3 year Al-anon birthday! It's funny the way time works for me, its duality. On one hand, it seems like just yesterday when I crawled on my knees into that first recovery experience. In other...

evey · evey

Hello All, I've hit a brick wall in terms of my plan b. For the past two years I have been steadily making progress with it. Now I may, state again may, have a good job opportunity but, isn't there always a but, there is a 90 minute commute involved and I have a 10 year old son. I would be gone from 6a.m to 6p.m....

serendipity · serendipity

I just don't get it. My ex ah just called and I stupidly took the call. Then i stupidly got into it with him. Why? He is with someone new. He told me to stop spreding rumors. he is sober, sane and the girl he is with has 14c years in the program. This is crazy!!!! he has been sober like 6 months, he did what he did t...

Cucamonga · Cucamonga

Hi all, Hope I meet you all well. I have not posted here in a while, and have not been to a face2face since last week thursday. have been so busy with business and things are going ok at home. I was feeling that I am getting away from this wonderful program that brought me this serenity. So here I am checkin...

HEARTBROKEN IN NJ · HEARTBROKEN IN NJ

Well, I did it. I attended my first AA meeting last night. It was kinda how I imagined it to be. There must have been about 45-50 people there. Everyone in the room "shared" except me and my girlfriend that I brought with me and one other person. When they got to me, I just said, "No th...

weggie · weggie

Hello to everyone, this is my first time looking for help online. I have been going to Al-laon meetings when I could. To make a long story short, I have been married to an a for 37 years. I know thru the process that I am an anabler. I have found God and he has helped me thru trouble times. This last inci...

Sunny2007 · Sunny2007

hi & love to all, i'm in physical pain today (monday) since waking up .... have proper medical care, medicines, etc. ... this is nothing new ... the symptoms had been better for a while ...... this is pattern over last 2 years due to a specific diagnosis of nerve damage in both arms from neck to finge...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

WHEN I entered the Army medical center on base 20 minutes prior to delivering my baby, I had a hard time convincing the staff that I was definitely in the last stages of labor. We had waited 10 minutes in the pre-admittance area when a nurse finally came in and said, "My name is Captain Smith, but you...

babysteps · babysteps

My AH and I have a joint checking account. He is nickel and diming us to death! He thinks it is no big deal to take out $20 per day (or more)...it adds up! I would like to take his name off our account. Does anyone know if I can do this without his permission? I don't feel like I am necessarily trying to control h...

boricuaGA · boricuaGA

This morning I felt great, and I still feel good...just not 'great'... Through out the day I've been doing my research and reading and I have come to realize that I am an enabler. I'm a provoker and sometimes a martyr. What a horrible thing to come to realize. It doesn't feel good, but at the same time,...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

((MIP Friends)) For those who have not been updated, my AH is now in a detox facility. He has been there since Monday. I left him with a generous amount of cigarettes and change. The change is all gone so I have not heard from him today. I did phone the nurse to get an update about how he's doing. The nur...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	What's best for someone else. (Preview) First, I'd like to say thanks to everyone who has been so supportive. You're right, thinking of myself as the base that everyone else can lean on is bound to fail - I'll collapse, and no one will be well off. It's not accurate anyway - already there are indications that MY ideas of what everybody needs,...	lin0606	6	335	Apr 23, 2007 by Lunamoth
	Today (Preview) I went to my first meeting last night. I was scared - terrified in fact. My A knew I was going - she was so proud of me. Everyone at the meeting was so warm and wonderful, I sat like a rabbit caught in the headlights. But, at the end of the meeting, a lovely lady (M) handed me her phone number and told me to call he...	englishrose	4	420	Apr 23, 2007 by lin0606
	So you want to save your child? (Preview) Hi .. I'd like to share a story about my neighbor. Her daughter (30 yrs old) is a heroin addict, an addict is an addict be it alcohol or drugs. It's all the same. She blames her mother for her addiction. The Mother has never sought any help for herself. Mom accepts the blame the daughter dishes out b...	Christy	7	695	Apr 23, 2007 by jrtjosey
	And then I found Alanon.. (Preview) I wrote this poem quite a while before I got sick enough to seek help. I look back and see just how far down the black hole I had fallen. Thank Heaven I went to Alanon. THE BOOK The story never changes and the chapters never end. I want to close this book, so my heart can mend. The pages turn and years go...	Christy	8	624	Apr 23, 2007 by jrtjosey
	Had a visit with AH last night (Preview) (((Friends))) Thank you all for the comforting words the other night. I was in a pretty low spot and just needed to get it out. Yesterday was a much better day. My son is feeling better too and finally got to enjoy his TMNT cake after dinner. We went to the detox center yesterday evening to see AH. The...	twinmom2	6	558	Apr 23, 2007 by TLM
	hotline (Preview) Does anyone know of a website that lists hotlines? I needed one yesterday and floundered around way too long for my own sanity trying to find one. I didn't need it for myself but for someone who had called me seeking help. I did finally find what I wanted but it would have been very nice to have it at hand w...	Mobirdie	4	326	Apr 23, 2007 by Mobirdie
	Father's Eyes (Preview) Ok...so it's been a while since I've been on. I'm usually on here talking about my A who is my b/f. He's been living in an Oxford house now for 2 months and has been sober for 3 1/2! I am very happy but also taking things one day at a time. So we'll see....I'm actually writing about another A. My father. ...	daisygrl4	7	508	Apr 23, 2007 by EarthAngel
	More about talking to kids...and update (Preview) Last Wed. I got an email from my mother in law that my AH was in a terrible car accident and has a punctured lung, and back and leg injuries. He refused to tell her where he is and asked her not to tell me about the accident. She hasn't heard from him in almost a week. I called a few local hospitals but didn't...	carolinagirl	2	439	Apr 23, 2007 by Kim65
	GO ALLY WOO WOO WOO (Preview) ((((((((((((YO))))))))))))))) You will never believe what I done...... I am scared of heights right.....AND... I went up in a cable car, It took 6 mins and It went way way up on top of the mountains......OMG it was awesome..lol I came back down and I said to all my party....can I do that again ....hahah...	ally	5	492	Apr 23, 2007 by Becky1
	About addicted children - God love them. (Preview) I have an ongoing problem with "suggestions" given to parents of addicted children. They are, without exception, told that they are enablers, and they must say "No" now. They must do nothing for the child. Don't help them in any way. Don't get them out of jail, don't feed th...	Diva	20	695	Apr 23, 2007 by mel123
	New to this, thanks, and a bit about where I'm at - if that's okay? (Preview) I found this site a few days ago - I was in a really tough place and desperately needed someone to talk to. Yesterday I went into the chat room - I was tearful and over-emotional after a very rough night. Thank you to everyone that was around and just listened to me. I know I left abruptly - I'm so sorry about t...	englishrose	5	565	Apr 23, 2007 by abbyal
	living in limbo (Preview) I have been in this place before, and am sure I will be in it again. I do not know why I have such a difficult time with not knowing. Currently my AH is "clean and sober" but I have serious doubts. I know he is not attending meetings or working a program. History tells me that the emotional/m...	confused	6	689	Apr 23, 2007 by abbyal
	Having a sad moment (Preview) (((MIP Friends))) We had a great birthday party for the boys today. One of my son's started feeling ill almost as soon as we arrived at the park. He started feeling sick to his stomach and running fever and chills. Poor little guy. He did his best to enjoy it. All my family and AH's family was there, I...	twinmom2	10	659	Apr 22, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Saw my AHsober today.... (Preview) Hi Alanoners, At least now I know that I always have a place to go when I don't know what to do or say. Go directly to Alanon. I saw my AHsober today. I hadn't seen him in almost 2 months although we have talked on the phone about once a week. He said now we really need to talk about finances because we had to pa...	nmike	3	529	Apr 22, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Cutting the rope, the saga continues! (Preview) Hey ((((Family)))) Did you ever have one of those times when something really cool happens to you, and you are looking around for someone you know to tell, and no one is there!? Well dat just happened to me, and I'm like .... looking around....who can I call...mmmmm.. I know I'll share with my family of c...	david62	15	761	Apr 22, 2007 by bubbles1990
	need ideas for helping adult alcoholic child (Preview) I have been reading this message board for a few months now - off and on - looking for comments from parents and haven't seen any so far. Following advice from counselors, we have stopped loaning/giving money, refused return to our home until successful completion of rehab, and tried not to take the t...	atalossmom	8	2091	Apr 22, 2007 by atalossmom
	Talking to children of addicts about addiction??? (Preview) Last night I had this great conversation with my 12 yo daughter about her dad. She has to write a short essay on obstacles she has overcome and chose to talk about her stepfather's alcoholism. It's amazing how much you really don't know that went on when you were gone, out of town, out of the room, etc. ...	carolinagirl	10	1444	Apr 22, 2007 by Jill
	FROM Sunny2007 -- the latest (as of Saturday) (Preview) Hi Everyone, I made it to do the preparation for my 2 neurological tests Thursday, which included being awake for 24 hours before the first test. Won't know results till sometime next week, but dr. was doing these "just to be sure" and she doesn't expect to find anything wrong. Slept most o...	Sunny2007	5	538	Apr 22, 2007 by aunitedway
	Gratitude List (Preview) Today, I am feeling like I could easily "go there" so, I am posting my gratitude list. Today I am grateful that I live in a beautiful small town. I am grateful that spring is here and the trees are starting to leaf out I am grateful that I have my health I am grateful that I have found this board an...	TLM	5	444	Apr 22, 2007 by Jerry F
	It's a Girl!!! (Preview) Had a doctor's appointment yesterday. Baby and I are in great health and the baby is growing wonderfully. I am almost back up to my pre-pregnancy weight after losing nearly 15 pounds in the first trimester. Biggest news.....Doctor is almost positive that I am having a girl! That will make it 3 g...	melamom815	9	513	Apr 21, 2007 by Angel1
	Strength and Courage (Preview) Found out a few days ago that my husband has pancreatic cancer. I am trying to stay optimistic until we have seen the oncologist (next week) and started some treatment, but the chances are pretty good that he is dying. This is a famously bad cancer, and it has already spread. I'm finding that there are...	lin0606	6	362	Apr 21, 2007 by aunitedway
	How much of it is me? (Preview) So, my ex ah is seeing someone new. A new woman to enable him. The last convo I had with him which was Wednesday I lost it. I was sucked into the insanity. I had asked him if he signed the divorce papers and he said yes. Well, I call my lawyer daily and he never returns my calls. This has been going on for a year wi...	serendipity	2	490	Apr 21, 2007 by aunitedway
	God Can (Preview) Last night in a meeting someone was talking about a God Box, which reminded me... I used to use what I referred to as a God Can (I can't, but God CAN). I figured I still had it kicking around somewhere, and sure enough, on a shelf in my closet was my God Can. So I opened it up and looked inside... I was amazed a...	TLM	9	548	Apr 21, 2007 by aunitedway
	Moving Forward (Preview) This has been the first week of the rest of my life. I have set clear boundaries with my A ex b/f. He is keeping to most of them. I have been working through the chaos he has tried to lay at my feet. Mainly by stepping over it and moving on (of course, that is after I have a freak out in my head and with my poor...	Leetle	4	410	Apr 21, 2007 by nmike
	so painful (Preview) hi my AH is 30 days sober tomorrow. He went 68 days sober out of rehab before relapsing so this is not a HUGE milestone except he is going to AA and working the steps this time. My issue....When he is drunk he is affectionate, remorseful, tells me he loves me, misses me (we have been seperated since August)...	Angel1	5	500	Apr 21, 2007 by TLM
	Update (Preview) In his usual dramatic fashion the A claims to be leaving today. He wanted me to pack for him last night. I did not as I have to work today. He has now switched his answering machine off so I don't know whether he has left or not. He's left no forwarding address and I don't know when he starts work or anythin...	maresie2	5	436	Apr 21, 2007 by debilyn
	Anger (Preview) How do you let go of the anger? I attended a family counseling group last night at my husband's out-patient rehab. At first I told them that things between us has been about 75% better. The groups topic last night was communication. As the session went on, I realized that I kept my anger about th...	sash	4	624	Apr 20, 2007 by Christy
	BONJOUR LOL (Preview) (((((((((((ROOMIES)))))))))))))))) Yo, Having a wonderful time.....Went on the plane...was awesome.....Sunshine most days..Had a thunderstorm one night...OMG it was horrendous.. Went out for a walk on my own, got lost..lol I have been getting so much from here.. Watching all the sick in Lour...	ally	9	485	Apr 20, 2007 by wp
	An amazing post from AA board... (Preview) I found this on the AA board and it has made my day and possibly life brighter. Thanks Phil... Kicky Come Here---Go Away.. As long as we have not healed our childhood wounds then there are a lot more than two people involved in our relationships. There may only be two people in the room - but the room is al...	newday	3	576	Apr 20, 2007 by TLM
	Can't think of a snarky line here...but it won't let me post with out some cute line...so here is one (Preview) Words to Consider The decisive question for man is: Is he related to something infinite or not? That is the telling question of life. --Carl Jung Let the Power Work through You The times that life works best are when we get out of the way and let the power work through us. The writer says of an inspired shor...	Tiger2006	6	458	Apr 20, 2007 by lin0606
	Thank your lucky stars.... (Preview) (((Hi Everyone)))) Haven't been here in a while, my life has been busy busy... but just wanted to let you all know that this board is a lifesaver. This time last year, I was a scared, horrified, panic-stricken person who wanted nothing but to dwell on my horrible life and the possibility that I would hav...	hersh	6	367	Apr 20, 2007 by aunitedway
	Confusion (Preview) Hey guys. I'm new around here and I'm so glad you are all here. I went to my first al-anon meeting last night, but I've been to CODA in the past so I'm not a stranger to the steps or the healing. I was raised by an A father and later had a very intense 3 year relationship with A who I loved dearly but who finally...	simplyme	4	457	Apr 20, 2007 by simplyme
	Absolutely FUMING (Preview) A fiance sends me a text message saying: "FYI - I MIGHT have 2 go 2 work tomorrow morn - will let u know. But afterwards @ 4pm, Q is pickin me up 2 go and get sum shoes and do sum other stuff. Jus fyi. Tryin 2 communicate" That selfish BASTARD! He has not picked our son up ONCE this week from the si...	boricuaGA	6	671	Apr 20, 2007 by twinmom2
	Mixture of Feelings & Confusion (Preview) Hi everybody, Well, today I think I have been more 'confused' and had the most mixture of feelings than I have since I started Al-anon. I'm assuming this is normal. Last night A fiance got home. He looked like crap. I just look into his eyes and see despair, sadness, hurt, pain. I had a talk with him an...	boricuaGA	3	1099	Apr 20, 2007 by lin0606
	Update (Preview) Just wanted to post an update on my situation. My husband admitted himself into rehab on Friday night. He is there and seems to be doing well. His counselor and RN said that he is motivated and has a positive attitude. They keep him very busy with meetings, lectures, group and individual therapy. ...	cac	3	517	Apr 20, 2007 by carosie
	Two Steps Forward, One Step Back... (Preview) I lost it! Two nights ago it was my mothers birthday, and my AH decided to drink some shots of whisky before going out to dinner with the family. Did I detach with love or even with a hatchet? Not even close. I went off. I started slamming doors and yelling at him about how sick I am of him letting me down...	TLM	2	469	Apr 20, 2007 by danz123
	So...Now we aren't talking???? (Preview) Sat. and Sun. were pretty good days for my AH and I. Went to dinner Sat. nite at a non-alcohol restaurant, went out to a fast food breakfast Sun. and to look at new Plasma TV's ( I get a discount where I work, plus $$$ to spend towards it!) Got home, went over to friend's house with him to watch race, took munc...	Becky1	6	639	Apr 20, 2007 by abbyal
	A humbling insight (sigh) (Preview) I have been STRUGGLING daily with a depressed feeling for a couple of weeks, low energy, obsessing in the same old way about the A, feeling like I'm in a stuffy cotton bag. Not long ago I made a breakthrough in terms of detatchment and felt some blessed peace . . . but since I threw a mega temper tantrum at t...	Kim65	5	646	Apr 20, 2007 by Kim65
	I feel like a horrible person (Preview) This is my first time on this website. I hope that it helps, i feel like I'm all alone in this and it's hard to talk about. I have never fully told this story to anyone and I hope that I'm not really the only one in the world that feels like this. So here is my story: My husband realized that he was an alcoholi...	everydayjane	10	723	Apr 19, 2007 by cac
	A poem that helped me, and may help you (Preview) Last night I read the first chapter in Melody Beattie's Codependents' Guide To The Twelve Steps. I read Psalm 21 and the Lord put this poem in my heart. Lift me up Lord and clear my heavy mind Release me from this bondage and take away my cries my heart is full of anger consumed with resentment and hate and...	boricuaGA	2	343	Apr 19, 2007 by ShelBell
	things got ugly around here last night (Preview) I once again told my daughter that there's no drinking, drugs, boy friends spending the night, or foul mouth garbage, etc. I said I will call the police if needed. The breaker was that her boy friend is not welcomed here, especially spending the night. She said we were f.... ing pissing her off and sh...	gimmpy	6	612	Apr 19, 2007 by debilyn
	recovering (Preview) Hi everyone, I was just thinking.....when I was with myA I used to post my crisis situations on this board and got great help from you all. This helped me through so much. We sperated four months ago. He's still drinking himself to death, not doing very well. He says he knows the disease will take him. Sad...	annmarie	2	313	Apr 19, 2007 by debilyn
	just a wonder where Lilms is post is all (Preview) ver are yee my dahling??? love,debilyn	debilyn	4	316	Apr 19, 2007 by debilyn
	A thank you... to everyone who posts on this message board (Preview) First, I want to thank everyone on this board who posts. I have learned so much from you all. I have learned that my "feelings" are quite normal and that the most important thing I can do is not continuously worry about my ex A b/f, but instead to worry about myself and MY recovery from all I'v...	HEARTBROKEN IN NJ	9	603	Apr 19, 2007 by debilyn
	I am no longer blind (Preview) Hello everybody, Today I woke up with such a high hope in my heart. Yesterday I went to the bookstore and picked up *Melody Beattie's Codeependents Guide To The Twelve Steps*. WOW...what an awesome book filled with allowing you to see the revelations that have been there all along. I read the first cha...	boricuaGA	3	536	Apr 19, 2007 by debilyn
	My Anger is through the roof... a vent post (Preview) The amount of anger and rage I have for my AH today could probably power the entire city. Just came back from the body shop, this A... hole caused 5K worth of damage to my van. Not to mention I have to sell my home, and probably go through 7 years of bad credit because I can't pay on my credit card debt right n...	twinmom2	14	768	Apr 19, 2007 by Christy
	Need suggestions for books for me (Preview) I am not certain when i can make it to an al-anon meeting...i have a young son and have not found a meeting in my area with babysitting. in the mean time i need to get a book to help me deal with this and better myself. what ive learned so far is that i NEED to detach your suggestions are appreciated...	boricuaGA	7	705	Apr 19, 2007 by boricuaGA
	Needing to connect this morning (Preview) I am not having a very good morning. I am having a hard time keeping the focus on me. A son seemed to be doing very well lately (still drinking but not having any problems that I know of). This morning seems to be a not so good morning for him. I did not ask questions but now I find myself projecting alot. I just...	Gailey	6	762	Apr 19, 2007 by Rita G
	Everything is falling apart... (Preview) Well, I just got back from my vacation in Alabama with the 3 kids (driving)...and I was sick when I left and even sicker when I got home. Thought I was going to die on Sunday and went to the dr. on Monday. Looks like I might have pneumonia and am on serious antibiotics. My home computer has a terrible viru...	carolinagirl	10	793	Apr 19, 2007 by Rita G
	Getting Rich in Al-Anon (Preview) Happy April 17th! (((((((((((Family))))))))))))) Did that title get your attention??? He he he Today is my 3 year Al-anon birthday! It's funny the way time works for me, its duality. On one hand, it seems like just yesterday when I crawled on my knees into that first recovery experience. In other...	david62	12	713	Apr 19, 2007 by Rita G
	Brick Wall (Preview) Hello All, I've hit a brick wall in terms of my plan b. For the past two years I have been steadily making progress with it. Now I may, state again may, have a good job opportunity but, isn't there always a but, there is a 90 minute commute involved and I have a 10 year old son. I would be gone from 6a.m to 6p.m....	evey	4	371	Apr 19, 2007 by thinkstoomuch
	Why? (Preview) I just don't get it. My ex ah just called and I stupidly took the call. Then i stupidly got into it with him. Why? He is with someone new. He told me to stop spreding rumors. he is sober, sane and the girl he is with has 14c years in the program. This is crazy!!!! he has been sober like 6 months, he did what he did t...	serendipity	6	507	Apr 19, 2007 by carosie
	Just checking in (Preview) Hi all, Hope I meet you all well. I have not posted here in a while, and have not been to a face2face since last week thursday. have been so busy with business and things are going ok at home. I was feeling that I am getting away from this wonderful program that brought me this serenity. So here I am checkin...	Cucamonga	2	346	Apr 19, 2007 by Karilynn
	My first AA meeting (Preview) Well, I did it. I attended my first AA meeting last night. It was kinda how I imagined it to be. There must have been about 45-50 people there. Everyone in the room "shared" except me and my girlfriend that I brought with me and one other person. When they got to me, I just said, "No th...	HEARTBROKEN IN NJ	3	296	Apr 19, 2007 by belle1
	Happened again (Preview) Hello to everyone, this is my first time looking for help online. I have been going to Al-laon meetings when I could. To make a long story short, I have been married to an a for 37 years. I know thru the process that I am an anabler. I have found God and he has helped me thru trouble times. This last inci...	weggie	6	1477	Apr 18, 2007 by Sunny2007
	From Sunny2007-I'm in physical pain (Monday) (Preview) hi & love to all, i'm in physical pain today (monday) since waking up .... have proper medical care, medicines, etc. ... this is nothing new ... the symptoms had been better for a while ...... this is pattern over last 2 years due to a specific diagnosis of nerve damage in both arms from neck to finge...	Sunny2007	6	448	Apr 18, 2007 by weggie
	A little prospective for your day...... (Preview) WHEN I entered the Army medical center on base 20 minutes prior to delivering my baby, I had a hard time convincing the staff that I was definitely in the last stages of labor. We had waited 10 minutes in the pre-admittance area when a nurse finally came in and said, "My name is Captain Smith, but you...	Tiger2006	0	288	Apr 18, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Banking Question (Preview) My AH and I have a joint checking account. He is nickel and diming us to death! He thinks it is no big deal to take out $20 per day (or more)...it adds up! I would like to take his name off our account. Does anyone know if I can do this without his permission? I don't feel like I am necessarily trying to control h...	babysteps	6	389	Apr 18, 2007 by CJ
	Enabler, Co-dependent & Detachment (Preview) This morning I felt great, and I still feel good...just not 'great'... Through out the day I've been doing my research and reading and I have come to realize that I am an enabler. I'm a provoker and sometimes a martyr. What a horrible thing to come to realize. It doesn't feel good, but at the same time,...	boricuaGA	3	1778	Apr 18, 2007 by twinmom2
	Update (Preview) ((MIP Friends)) For those who have not been updated, my AH is now in a detox facility. He has been there since Monday. I left him with a generous amount of cigarettes and change. The change is all gone so I have not heard from him today. I did phone the nurse to get an update about how he's doing. The nur...	twinmom2	3	302	Apr 18, 2007 by rtexas
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.