Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

jaja · jaja

First,thank you to you guys who responded to my "D" word post earlier today. It truly has helped. I also wanted to share about something I read today that really shed some light, really brought my situation into focus. It spoke of the elusiveness of an A and how they can disappear, and ...

david62 · david62

Hello (((((Family)))))) Got into a great discussion with a friend today and wanted to share some of it. In a nutshell, I was talking about how for most of my life I lived with this protective....well lets call it a nutshell!....wrapped around me. This shell protected me from the effects of the outsid...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, My story is that I seperated from my Abf six months ago. The relationship was turning me into a hateful person. I felt to seperate was the only way I could cope. It was the best thing to do, for both of us. Despite this decision we love each other very much. Since then I have been feeling somewha...

Leetle · Leetle

It took me years to realize I was banging my head against a brick wall. I tried to stop on my own and it took me even more time to acknowledge that I can't do it myself. I had a big breakthrough when I got so desperate, that I finally allowed myself to reach out for help from people in recovery! This week I h...

wallsal55 · wallsal55

Hi....Haven't popped in....in ages. But, I guess our recovery path takes us many, many, many places! It has been a wild carpet ride for me.....just like they said it would be. Oh......I've been in spots, I didn't want to go....and still do! But, I cannot tell you from going from complete isol...

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

(((((Everyone)))) The other week I was about to leave my drive to go out to dinner when my car died. That was okay, for whatever reason I wasn't suppose to go. So the next day I had it towed, only we had a wicked Northeastern sweep the south and when the tow truck arrived I saw him pull around something......

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Yesterday I commented on someone elses post about how I would love a raise sign and then last night I got a call about a job in a new town that would end up paying less per hr. but more overall. I have been debating whether to interview or not since it's a day's drive there and back. I have decided to go. Als...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Funny, since I have been here I have heard so many stories, most have many many similarities but there are a few of you that I read and think did I write that under my other personality? LOL There are 4 of you in particular that I can think of who I read and I think this is my life and I can't tell you how helpfu...

QOD · QOD

I have been wanting to post this all week but didn't know exactly what to say. My thoughts on it are a bit tangled. Maybe y'all can give me some ESH that will help me. My AH has been home for the last month. He hasn't used drugs since he got out of jail 2 months ago. While he was off on his several binges earli...

ally · ally

This is todays reading in the c2c.....I thought I would post this, for anyone who does not have that book... "Just For Today" Ally Girl -- Edited by tea2 at 09:49, 2007-05-11

Jeannie · Jeannie

Hi (((everyone))) I hope this finds you all well. I have been off the board for a while, dealing with work, home children and a new life. After all these years I completely split with and am divorcing my AH. I cannot even begin to tell you how free I feel. Like a huge anvil has been lifted off my head. Several...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

For those who know the rest of the story... I was online last night messing around and looking online at court stuff checking out my husband's next date, charges, etc. I decided I'd look for other ppl with the same charges and guess who I found on the list? The girl he had gone to jail for assaulting a fe...

serendipity · serendipity

In my life I have always been told by my family of origin and my a to "not dwell on it, let it go, get over it, don't think about it." So, I woke up this morning at 5 am. I came here and didn't do anything stupid. But I have been thinking about "it" all day. I still have this physical feeli...

lilms · lilms

((((((((Friends)))))))))) Afternoon all, I am a little late with this (was at a funeral in another city so have been away) but I am wishing myself a happy one year on this board. I wanted to include you all because your wisdom has helped to change my life. And a year later life is happy. Certianly not per...

ajt62 · ajt62

Long share (and I haven't even started typing it yet...) I'm Allison, and my 23yo daughter is the addict in my life. She's had issues, was clean for a long time, but has been back on oxycontin recently. She lives 200 mi away from me - I sent her to live in the town where my mom and sis live to get her away fro...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

This is something that has been bothering me, I guess maybe I have been in DENIAL about it, can't really say why, but here goes: I am very embarrassed of my AH. I don't want my coworkers or new freinds to meet him. I don't like being seen with him. There are several reasons. He doesn't shower (maybe once eve...

jaja · jaja

Divorce. Unsure as I've been recently, I came right out and told my A I wanted out. I have learned how to communicate better, no attitude,accusing or being defensive and I have been much better at saying what I mean. The atmosphere had been good. Yet he didn't seem to get it. He would listen to me, be...

sisdragonfly1957 · sisdragonfly1957

I really need to hear from other members, have you ever been able to be just friends with your former A? We lived together for 2 years known each other for two years after. Went through all kinds of things together. Now live six streets apart. I have gotten help with my codependency and attending Al -non...

java · java

CJ had a post that made me think about crosstalk and then one response by Barisax mentioned that continuing with a tread of thought that might continue into another, should be a new topic....so here goes>>>a new topic: Losing a loved one, in this case my dad, has been a long and arduous proce...

janey225 · janey225

What a day today has been. I did alot of reading yeterday and I went to bed last night determined to wake up with a positive attitude. I did and I had a great day. There was a break through with my AH today. He tod me something that he has been carrying around for years and he says that it is one of the reasons he...

maresie2 · maresie2

One of the things about the A's actions that bothered me the most was that at the same time as he was demanding I take care of him and put him first he was always putting me last. The latest example of taking in the homeless couple is one of them. He told me last Wednesday he felt overwhelmed by their needs a...

tea2 · tea2

OK, I am curious Clearly I am not the most computer savvy can anyone fill me in on where these neat avatars (that are not from the library images here) can be found?

hopefully · hopefully

My A & I have been together 15 yrs but gradually, every year things get worse. Sometimes I think it just creeps up on us & we don't realize it has gotten so bad. Today my A's ex-daughter-in-law stopped by the house to tell me that when the A goes to his 14 yr old grandaughter's soccer games he's been...

twinmom2 · twinmom2

(((Hello my MIP Family))) Just wanted to share a little bit about boundaries. It's not my favorite topic but seems to be the most demanding aspect of my recovery right now. I do believe HP is challenging me to step it up in the boundaries department not just with my AH, with my kids, my job, and myself. ...

Katy · Katy

My ah came home from work yesterday very angry, our 16 year old son had spent a few hours working with him, they had got into an arguement and my husband was angry to the point of wanting to throw our son through the door, as my husband was telling me his voice was becoming louder and he was shaking with rage...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) My second F2F meeting I bought the ODAT daily reader. My morning routine was to drive into work and before entering into the chaos which is my job... read the daily passage and meditate a bit on what it means to me and my situations. Well, during a .... invigorating disscussion (LOL)...

maresie2 · maresie2

Right now I am giving it all to HP. After obtaining a judgment against me because the A did not move out (I signed a joint tenancy so I am liable) the landlord has let the A stay in exchange for some building work. In the meantime I am trying to get a Judge to sign an order saying he has to give the truck to me (wo...

hudsond · hudsond

I've been pretty down lately. having some difficulty with a few things--anyway money extremely tight this month--you all know how that feels. So this morning I'm just talking with my HP and say you know what I could really use a miracle this week. Not 2 minutes later, for some reason I put my hand into...

minnie · minnie

It seems like that's all I do, complain :) It's been awhile since I've been on, we lost our internet for awhile. I guess it's just the same old same old going on here. I have a friend at work, my first in several years, and we've been able to go out a couple of times, just the girls, which was nice, because I h...

Tammy · Tammy

For those of you that dont know my husband left Saturday (again) but this time it is different... Why ?? Because I am different. I ask him to leave and even gave him $$ to leave. I didnt cry ( at least not in front of him ) and I didnt BEG him not to leave !! I kept praying about when was the right time to take o...

hopefully · hopefully

Is there a page that explains how this Board works? What is the whiteboard & what is subscriptions? How do you leave private messages to each other as has been mentioned in some comments. What is an avitar? What do some of the initials mean? I figured out f2f but it sure took awhile. There are others I...

ally · ally

I was surfing the net looking for inspiration, on how to stop loving someone....lol (if only) And I found this, I had a few tears in my eye..... Gives new meaning to "Life is to short" I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Jin. I always thought of him as a friend until last year, wh...

renah · renah

Dear all, I am angry at the AH good bit of the time when he is sober. Some of the things are very trivial and he is not even aware that I get angry. Some examples are eating too loudly, walking faster than me and not appearing to care, suggesting a restaurant that I don't have an opinion on but it was not my num...

ally · ally

(((Guys)))) I'm going through a very hard time right now.Emotionally..... I have a load of unanswered questions::: WHY....Was I born into a family with Alcoholism in it.... WHY....Have I been affected so badly by this.... WHY.... Has this put my Life on hold....Why has it held me back.... WHY...Do...

davidssibling · davidssibling

A beautiful song I think by Jim Brickman, I have a copy of this in a chest I have for my daughter for her to read after I am dead. A must read, so beautiful. May the angels protect you Trouble neglect you And heaven accept you when its time to go home May you always have plenty The glass never empty Know in your b...

maresie2 · maresie2

One thing I am aware of is how little patience I have. Now that I have decided I want to sever all ties with the A I want it yesterday and then some. I have to go to court to get the truck back. I also have to go to court to appeal the rental issue which seems to say that I have to pay rent while he remains in the un...

serendipity · serendipity

I am better but still this feeling inside me persists. I wonder when it will lessen? When I think I am choosing to turn my mind to something else, I feel like I am denying what I am feeling, what I am going thru. It is a real, physical feeling. And when I think of him telling me he is in love with this other woman...

maresie2 · maresie2

I am moving past all the ambivalence all the stuff that kept me tied up with the A. All the "ifs" "if onlys" the "why" even. I am moving past to say I have had enough. I can no longer take his actions. I can no longer be made all the time to be the patsy to the consequences...

desert_brat · desert_brat

So I am really not sure where to turn right now and I am struggling with this. My question is "is it ever okay to nudge the A along in their recovery?". I know this is "his" journey and I have tried to detach myself from "his" disease as best I can. I remove myself from sit...

steppgirl · steppgirl

I choose to live with my active A. I choose to put up with his jealousy and rude comments. I choose to take up his slack with responsability. I choose not to let it ruin my day or my life. Am I crazy? I make my own happiness. I will not let my A control my happiness! guess I just relly needed to say that this morni...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Hi guys, just wanted to share this letter with you that I wrote to my husband (currently in jail) a couple weeks ago. I changed the names to protect the guilty...LOL Dear Alcoholic/Junkie, This letter has been a long time coming and has taken me a while to get to writing. Im so glad that I came to pick yo...

stephie · stephie

How does life get here. My A. I love him I do, but, I'm tired, I have no self esteem left, I doubt my friends, I doubt my life, I doubt myself. Leave him, Leave him, leave him. I hear that so many times. Well that might be easier if a) I didn't love him b) we weren't married c) I had someplace to live d) I h...

janey225 · janey225

I am new here. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been attending AA meetings and been trying to get sober from what I can tell. He moved out last week. I have so much anger toward him. I worry about him all the time. I am so lost and I dont know what to do. I have 3 children with him.I love him so much but I feel lik...

ally · ally

Hey Guys, Came back from f2f tonight, Topic was...Helping the Alcoholic... I'm sitting here, with my jacket and shoes still on, been home two hrs....I feel so powerless over Ally..... The last two days I have been having emotional difficulties.....I am trying sooo hard to let go of someone...

nmike · nmike

Does anyone know when the Yosemite Conference is? Someone went one time and said it was great. Nancy

bobbie7277 · bobbie7277

Please give me some feedback on this subject. Thanks

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

My regular meeting sponsor is NOT WORKING FOR ME!!! When I talk to her she is usually distracted and I feel like I'm wasting her time or she's not really interested in what I have to say. I haven't really been given any direction on working the steps. I know I am ready to move on in my recovery and think if...

blufan · blufan

My soon-to-be 21-year-old son is currently serving 40-day sentence in jail for a second DUI. He'll be out in 10 days. My husband is a recovering alcoholic for 15 years now (yay!), so I've been through this before. I have no idea if my son is an alcholic or just having too much fun and thought he could ge...

lin0606 · lin0606

Bought an old cassette at a garage sale yesterday. First song that came on when I popped it in seemed to be sent to all of you who are leaving, have just left, are thinking of leaving, your A. "Well I know it wasn't you who held me down Heaven knows it wasn't you who set me free So often times it happens T...

Rita G · Rita G

I have read several post that our some of the member are looking for or considering finding a sponsor. At my f2f meeting last night I found a pamphlet on Sponsorship. Although I can't type all of it, I thought I would post some of the info that I thought was really helpful. It is a really great pamp...

kissers · kissers

I was outside today taking a moment to let go of work related issues that were getting to me. I was looking up at the trees and asked HP if He was there. A bird landed on the fence to my left. He pooped and flew away. I guess HP was telling me to "Let Go, Let God".

davidssibling · davidssibling

Usually I am full of fun and jokes, actually still am, but inside I am feeling a boiling point of bitterness to all the A's in my life. All the A's in the world. Seriously have to get hold of myself. I feel if an A were to come to me for a sip of water, if I were to smell alcohol on them I would slam the door, even if I...

doxie · doxie

It has taken me a long time to be ready to share this. My son sent this to me while he was still in prison. He stated this was "his" life and this poem meant a lot to him. It meant so much to receive this from him and I was touched to the core of my being. I thought I would share it with you. BTW he has been...

sash · sash

I just really need to vent. My husband is in recovery and he is about a month and a half sober. I am so happy that his is doing well in his program and extremely proud of him. However, something that drives me really really nuts is when he gets into his "holier than thou" mode. I smoke cigarett...

TLM · TLM

I am always going on about "reason, season, lifetime," based on something I saw years ago, and strangely someone just sent it to me again today. I had to see it as a message from HP and wanted to share it. It has brought me a lot of peace in my life. Today - we might as well dance!! People come int...

TLC2 · TLC2

I am horrified at what John is going through, I have seen it before and I think it's from some jealous, spiteful person/persons. Then my son called me last night, really upset. ( he is the one who had that meat-eating chemical splashed full in his face a few weeks ago). He hasn't regained full vision,an...

david62 · david62

(((((Family)))) Some "Sunday Go Ta Meetin" humor with a moral for ya! *The Pastor's Donkey* *The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. * *The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered in another race** ** and it won again.* * **The local paper read: * * PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRO...

Tammy · Tammy

I dont even know where to start... My life is such a mess. My A husband and I have been riding this wild rollercoaster since it seems like forever. Really it has been 2 1/2 years. We seperated in September then 5 days later he received a DUI, I thought that was his rock bottom. Although we were living ap...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

Ok, I passed my CNA exam!! I started taking the class in late January, not long after I found MIP, as a way of building myself up. Most people know a CNA is a small victory, but it's significant for me- I have never completed any sort of training program before. Now I have a wider area of job opportunity and i...

debilyn · debilyn

Heartbroken in NJ reminded me of this question. My AH never made amends to me. Of all people in his life, the mother of his child, the woman who was his friend/lover and wife for way over thirty years, never received one. He even made amends to his horrible dysfunctional family members who surely did not...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Maybe I'm getting "unbound" (Preview) First,thank you to you guys who responded to my "D" word post earlier today. It truly has helped. I also wanted to share about something I read today that really shed some light, really brought my situation into focus. It spoke of the elusiveness of an A and how they can disappear, and ...	jaja	2	578	May 11, 2007 by lin0606
	Getting out of the Matrix (Preview) Hello (((((Family)))))) Got into a great discussion with a friend today and wanted to share some of it. In a nutshell, I was talking about how for most of my life I lived with this protective....well lets call it a nutshell!....wrapped around me. This shell protected me from the effects of the outsid...	david62	3	541	May 11, 2007 by bob6502
	this too will pass (Preview) Hi everyone, My story is that I seperated from my Abf six months ago. The relationship was turning me into a hateful person. I felt to seperate was the only way I could cope. It was the best thing to do, for both of us. Despite this decision we love each other very much. Since then I have been feeling somewha...	annmarie	6	416	May 11, 2007 by hersh
	Brick Wall (Preview) It took me years to realize I was banging my head against a brick wall. I tried to stop on my own and it took me even more time to acknowledge that I can't do it myself. I had a big breakthrough when I got so desperate, that I finally allowed myself to reach out for help from people in recovery! This week I h...	Leetle	4	449	May 11, 2007 by Maria123
	Hi.....Alanon....opportunities....Health.... (Preview) Hi....Haven't popped in....in ages. But, I guess our recovery path takes us many, many, many places! It has been a wild carpet ride for me.....just like they said it would be. Oh......I've been in spots, I didn't want to go....and still do! But, I cannot tell you from going from complete isol...	wallsal55	0	261	May 11, 2007 by wallsal55
	Just a share.... (Preview) (((((Everyone)))) The other week I was about to leave my drive to go out to dinner when my car died. That was okay, for whatever reason I wasn't suppose to go. So the next day I had it towed, only we had a wicked Northeastern sweep the south and when the tow truck arrived I saw him pull around something......	Lunamoth	7	533	May 11, 2007 by CJ
	Job and move... (Preview) Yesterday I commented on someone elses post about how I would love a raise sign and then last night I got a call about a job in a new town that would end up paying less per hr. but more overall. I have been debating whether to interview or not since it's a day's drive there and back. I have decided to go. Als...	carolinagirl	4	465	May 11, 2007 by Rita G
	Hearing your own story... (Preview) Funny, since I have been here I have heard so many stories, most have many many similarities but there are a few of you that I read and think did I write that under my other personality? LOL There are 4 of you in particular that I can think of who I read and I think this is my life and I can't tell you how helpfu...	carolinagirl	1	420	May 11, 2007 by QOD
	Credit Card Fraud or Guilty AH??? (Preview) I have been wanting to post this all week but didn't know exactly what to say. My thoughts on it are a bit tangled. Maybe y'all can give me some ESH that will help me. My AH has been home for the last month. He hasn't used drugs since he got out of jail 2 months ago. While he was off on his several binges earli...	QOD	8	641	May 11, 2007 by QOD
	Courage 2 Change 11th May (Preview) This is todays reading in the c2c.....I thought I would post this, for anyone who does not have that book... "Just For Today" Ally Girl -- Edited by tea2 at 09:49, 2007-05-11	ally	2	392	May 11, 2007 by tea2
	Update (Preview) Hi (((everyone))) I hope this finds you all well. I have been off the board for a while, dealing with work, home children and a new life. After all these years I completely split with and am divorcing my AH. I cannot even begin to tell you how free I feel. Like a huge anvil has been lifted off my head. Several...	Jeannie	7	561	May 11, 2007 by Karilynn
	Update and two topics related to the continuing saga... (Preview) For those who know the rest of the story... I was online last night messing around and looking online at court stuff checking out my husband's next date, charges, etc. I decided I'd look for other ppl with the same charges and guess who I found on the list? The girl he had gone to jail for assaulting a fe...	carolinagirl	6	546	May 11, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Thinking too much? (Preview) In my life I have always been told by my family of origin and my a to "not dwell on it, let it go, get over it, don't think about it." So, I woke up this morning at 5 am. I came here and didn't do anything stupid. But I have been thinking about "it" all day. I still have this physical feeli...	serendipity	8	724	May 10, 2007 by carolinagirl
	Happy One Year (Preview) ((((((((Friends)))))))))) Afternoon all, I am a little late with this (was at a funeral in another city so have been away) but I am wishing myself a happy one year on this board. I wanted to include you all because your wisdom has helped to change my life. And a year later life is happy. Certianly not per...	lilms	9	387	May 10, 2007 by Maria123
	Rambling, letting go, letting God... (Preview) Long share (and I haven't even started typing it yet...) I'm Allison, and my 23yo daughter is the addict in my life. She's had issues, was clean for a long time, but has been back on oxycontin recently. She lives 200 mi away from me - I sent her to live in the town where my mom and sis live to get her away fro...	ajt62	4	509	May 10, 2007 by Tiger2006
	ashamed to feel ashamed (Preview) This is something that has been bothering me, I guess maybe I have been in DENIAL about it, can't really say why, but here goes: I am very embarrassed of my AH. I don't want my coworkers or new freinds to meet him. I don't like being seen with him. There are several reasons. He doesn't shower (maybe once eve...	RainyJamie	12	760	May 10, 2007 by RainyJamie
	I said the "D" word (Preview) Divorce. Unsure as I've been recently, I came right out and told my A I wanted out. I have learned how to communicate better, no attitude,accusing or being defensive and I have been much better at saying what I mean. The atmosphere had been good. Yet he didn't seem to get it. He would listen to me, be...	jaja	5	532	May 10, 2007 by Friendofyours
	Can you ever really be friends with your former A?? (Preview) I really need to hear from other members, have you ever been able to be just friends with your former A? We lived together for 2 years known each other for two years after. Went through all kinds of things together. Now live six streets apart. I have gotten help with my codependency and attending Al -non...	sisdragonfly1957	8	577	May 10, 2007 by lilms
	Losing a loved one is a process (Preview) CJ had a post that made me think about crosstalk and then one response by Barisax mentioned that continuing with a tread of thought that might continue into another, should be a new topic....so here goes>>>a new topic: Losing a loved one, in this case my dad, has been a long and arduous proce...	java	5	540	May 10, 2007 by lilms
	Wow What a Break through (Preview) What a day today has been. I did alot of reading yeterday and I went to bed last night determined to wake up with a positive attitude. I did and I had a great day. There was a break through with my AH today. He tod me something that he has been carrying around for years and he says that it is one of the reasons he...	janey225	3	447	May 10, 2007 by ally
	what has bothered me most (Preview) One of the things about the A's actions that bothered me the most was that at the same time as he was demanding I take care of him and put him first he was always putting me last. The latest example of taking in the homeless couple is one of them. He told me last Wednesday he felt overwhelmed by their needs a...	maresie2	3	474	May 10, 2007 by QOD
	off topic question (Preview) OK, I am curious Clearly I am not the most computer savvy can anyone fill me in on where these neat avatars (that are not from the library images here) can be found?	tea2	5	371	May 10, 2007 by QOD
	A new delima (Preview) My A & I have been together 15 yrs but gradually, every year things get worse. Sometimes I think it just creeps up on us & we don't realize it has gotten so bad. Today my A's ex-daughter-in-law stopped by the house to tell me that when the A goes to his 14 yr old grandaughter's soccer games he's been...	hopefully	3	440	May 10, 2007 by Rita G
	Getting comfortable with boundaries.... Don't have much of a choice (Preview) (((Hello my MIP Family))) Just wanted to share a little bit about boundaries. It's not my favorite topic but seems to be the most demanding aspect of my recovery right now. I do believe HP is challenging me to step it up in the boundaries department not just with my AH, with my kids, my job, and myself. ...	twinmom2	8	558	May 10, 2007 by hudsond
	Alanon in action. (Preview) My ah came home from work yesterday very angry, our 16 year old son had spent a few hours working with him, they had got into an arguement and my husband was angry to the point of wanting to throw our son through the door, as my husband was telling me his voice was becoming louder and he was shaking with rage...	Katy	4	508	May 10, 2007 by Katy
	AW swipes my ODAT.... what a gift! (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) My second F2F meeting I bought the ODAT daily reader. My morning routine was to drive into work and before entering into the chaos which is my job... read the daily passage and meditate a bit on what it means to me and my situations. Well, during a .... invigorating disscussion (LOL)...	rtexas	8	588	May 10, 2007 by kismetstrand
	giving it all to HP (Preview) Right now I am giving it all to HP. After obtaining a judgment against me because the A did not move out (I signed a joint tenancy so I am liable) the landlord has let the A stay in exchange for some building work. In the meantime I am trying to get a Judge to sign an order saying he has to give the truck to me (wo...	maresie2	3	263	May 9, 2007 by kissers
	Asked for a miracle today (Preview) I've been pretty down lately. having some difficulty with a few things--anyway money extremely tight this month--you all know how that feels. So this morning I'm just talking with my HP and say you know what I could really use a miracle this week. Not 2 minutes later, for some reason I put my hand into...	hudsond	6	580	May 9, 2007 by Jill
	just more venting (Preview) It seems like that's all I do, complain :) It's been awhile since I've been on, we lost our internet for awhile. I guess it's just the same old same old going on here. I have a friend at work, my first in several years, and we've been able to go out a couple of times, just the girls, which was nice, because I h...	minnie	3	451	May 9, 2007 by hersh
	My HP at work, so I know I am doing the right thing.. (Preview) For those of you that dont know my husband left Saturday (again) but this time it is different... Why ?? Because I am different. I ask him to leave and even gave him $$ to leave. I didnt cry ( at least not in front of him ) and I didnt BEG him not to leave !! I kept praying about when was the right time to take o...	Tammy	7	522	May 9, 2007 by hersh
	Stupid questions (Preview) Is there a page that explains how this Board works? What is the whiteboard & what is subscriptions? How do you leave private messages to each other as has been mentioned in some comments. What is an avitar? What do some of the initials mean? I figured out f2f but it sure took awhile. There are others I...	hopefully	4	391	May 9, 2007 by tea2
	READ THIS...IT IS SO SAD......AN EXAMPLE OF A DAY AT A TIME (Preview) I was surfing the net looking for inspiration, on how to stop loving someone....lol (if only) And I found this, I had a few tears in my eye..... Gives new meaning to "Life is to short" I have a boyfriend who grew up with me. His name is Jin. I always thought of him as a friend until last year, wh...	ally	3	461	May 9, 2007 by Becky1
	Angry A lot of the time (Preview) Dear all, I am angry at the AH good bit of the time when he is sober. Some of the things are very trivial and he is not even aware that I get angry. Some examples are eating too loudly, walking faster than me and not appearing to care, suggesting a restaurant that I don't have an opinion on but it was not my num...	renah	7	621	May 9, 2007 by maresie2
	WHY.....WHY......WHY...WHY... (Preview) (((Guys)))) I'm going through a very hard time right now.Emotionally..... I have a load of unanswered questions::: WHY....Was I born into a family with Alcoholism in it.... WHY....Have I been affected so badly by this.... WHY.... Has this put my Life on hold....Why has it held me back.... WHY...Do...	ally	15	746	May 9, 2007 by Lexie
	Never Alone (Preview) A beautiful song I think by Jim Brickman, I have a copy of this in a chest I have for my daughter for her to read after I am dead. A must read, so beautiful. May the angels protect you Trouble neglect you And heaven accept you when its time to go home May you always have plenty The glass never empty Know in your b...	davidssibling	2	270	May 9, 2007 by TLC2
	Letting go and letting god (Preview) One thing I am aware of is how little patience I have. Now that I have decided I want to sever all ties with the A I want it yesterday and then some. I have to go to court to get the truck back. I also have to go to court to appeal the rental issue which seems to say that I have to pay rent while he remains in the un...	maresie2	4	616	May 9, 2007 by TLC2
	How long will my detox from him take? (Preview) I am better but still this feeling inside me persists. I wonder when it will lessen? When I think I am choosing to turn my mind to something else, I feel like I am denying what I am feeling, what I am going thru. It is a real, physical feeling. And when I think of him telling me he is in love with this other woman...	serendipity	6	630	May 8, 2007 by CriedOut2
	moving to separation (Preview) I am moving past all the ambivalence all the stuff that kept me tied up with the A. All the "ifs" "if onlys" the "why" even. I am moving past to say I have had enough. I can no longer take his actions. I can no longer be made all the time to be the patsy to the consequences...	maresie2	2	349	May 8, 2007 by rtexas
	ESH question???? (Preview) So I am really not sure where to turn right now and I am struggling with this. My question is "is it ever okay to nudge the A along in their recovery?". I know this is "his" journey and I have tried to detach myself from "his" disease as best I can. I remove myself from sit...	desert_brat	10	641	May 8, 2007 by desert_brat
	Choice (Preview) I choose to live with my active A. I choose to put up with his jealousy and rude comments. I choose to take up his slack with responsability. I choose not to let it ruin my day or my life. Am I crazy? I make my own happiness. I will not let my A control my happiness! guess I just relly needed to say that this morni...	steppgirl	5	398	May 8, 2007 by Maria123
	Letter I wrote to my husband a while back (Preview) Hi guys, just wanted to share this letter with you that I wrote to my husband (currently in jail) a couple weeks ago. I changed the names to protect the guilty...LOL Dear Alcoholic/Junkie, This letter has been a long time coming and has taken me a while to get to writing. Im so glad that I came to pick yo...	carolinagirl	5	445	May 8, 2007 by Friendofyours
	hurt again (Preview) How does life get here. My A. I love him I do, but, I'm tired, I have no self esteem left, I doubt my friends, I doubt my life, I doubt myself. Leave him, Leave him, leave him. I hear that so many times. Well that might be easier if a) I didn't love him b) we weren't married c) I had someplace to live d) I h...	stephie	5	527	May 8, 2007 by evey
	I am so confused (Preview) I am new here. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been attending AA meetings and been trying to get sober from what I can tell. He moved out last week. I have so much anger toward him. I worry about him all the time. I am so lost and I dont know what to do. I have 3 children with him.I love him so much but I feel lik...	janey225	6	498	May 8, 2007 by maresie2
	FEELING VERY CONFUSED TONIGHT (Preview) Hey Guys, Came back from f2f tonight, Topic was...Helping the Alcoholic... I'm sitting here, with my jacket and shoes still on, been home two hrs....I feel so powerless over Ally..... The last two days I have been having emotional difficulties.....I am trying sooo hard to let go of someone...	ally	5	353	May 8, 2007 by maresie2
	Yosemite Conference???? (Preview) Does anyone know when the Yosemite Conference is? Someone went one time and said it was great. Nancy	nmike	1	346	May 8, 2007 by david62
	Acceptance vs Submission (Preview) Please give me some feedback on this subject. Thanks	bobbie7277	4	2875	May 8, 2007 by bobbie7277
	I need a sponsor... (Preview) My regular meeting sponsor is NOT WORKING FOR ME!!! When I talk to her she is usually distracted and I feel like I'm wasting her time or she's not really interested in what I have to say. I haven't really been given any direction on working the steps. I know I am ready to move on in my recovery and think if...	carolinagirl	6	556	May 8, 2007 by Tiger2006
	Where do I draw the line with son? (Preview) My soon-to-be 21-year-old son is currently serving 40-day sentence in jail for a second DUI. He'll be out in 10 days. My husband is a recovering alcoholic for 15 years now (yay!), so I've been through this before. I have no idea if my son is an alcholic or just having too much fun and thought he could ge...	blufan	5	649	May 8, 2007 by Jillanne
	Song Lyrics (Preview) Bought an old cassette at a garage sale yesterday. First song that came on when I popped it in seemed to be sent to all of you who are leaving, have just left, are thinking of leaving, your A. "Well I know it wasn't you who held me down Heaven knows it wasn't you who set me free So often times it happens T...	lin0606	4	1356	May 8, 2007 by lin0606
	Sponsorship, What It's All About (Preview) I have read several post that our some of the member are looking for or considering finding a sponsor. At my f2f meeting last night I found a pamphlet on Sponsorship. Although I can't type all of it, I thought I would post some of the info that I thought was really helpful. It is a really great pamp...	Rita G	2	6776	May 8, 2007 by ally
	HP Has a Funny Sense of Humor (Preview) I was outside today taking a moment to let go of work related issues that were getting to me. I was looking up at the trees and asked HP if He was there. A bird landed on the fence to my left. He pooped and flew away. I guess HP was telling me to "Let Go, Let God".	kissers	2	393	May 8, 2007 by Rita G
	Bitter (Preview) Usually I am full of fun and jokes, actually still am, but inside I am feeling a boiling point of bitterness to all the A's in my life. All the A's in the world. Seriously have to get hold of myself. I feel if an A were to come to me for a sip of water, if I were to smell alcohol on them I would slam the door, even if I...	davidssibling	3	421	May 8, 2007 by carolinagirl
	It took a long time for me to share this, but here goes (Preview) It has taken me a long time to be ready to share this. My son sent this to me while he was still in prison. He stated this was "his" life and this poem meant a lot to him. It meant so much to receive this from him and I was touched to the core of my being. I thought I would share it with you. BTW he has been...	doxie	8	693	May 7, 2007 by doxie
	I can be really hateful -- and I hate that! (Preview) I just really need to vent. My husband is in recovery and he is about a month and a half sober. I am so happy that his is doing well in his program and extremely proud of him. However, something that drives me really really nuts is when he gets into his "holier than thou" mode. I smoke cigarett...	sash	11	668	May 7, 2007 by Friendofyours
	A Reason, A Season, or a Lifetime (Preview) I am always going on about "reason, season, lifetime," based on something I saw years ago, and strangely someone just sent it to me again today. I had to see it as a message from HP and wanted to share it. It has brought me a lot of peace in my life. Today - we might as well dance!! People come int...	TLM	0	365	May 7, 2007 by TLM
	SHEESH! WHAT IS THIS? SH*T ON GOOD PEOPLE WEEK? (Preview) I am horrified at what John is going through, I have seen it before and I think it's from some jealous, spiteful person/persons. Then my son called me last night, really upset. ( he is the one who had that meat-eating chemical splashed full in his face a few weeks ago). He hasn't regained full vision,an...	TLC2	10	699	May 7, 2007 by TLC2
	The Pastor's Donkey (Preview) (((((Family)))) Some "Sunday Go Ta Meetin" humor with a moral for ya! The Pastor's Donkey The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered in another race* ** and it won again.* * *The local paper read: * PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRO...	david62	11	553	May 7, 2007 by davidssibling
	How do I begin ??? (Preview) I dont even know where to start... My life is such a mess. My A husband and I have been riding this wild rollercoaster since it seems like forever. Really it has been 2 1/2 years. We seperated in September then 5 days later he received a DUI, I thought that was his rock bottom. Although we were living ap...	Tammy	7	693	May 7, 2007 by Rita G
	one down, more to go (Preview) Ok, I passed my CNA exam!! I started taking the class in late January, not long after I found MIP, as a way of building myself up. Most people know a CNA is a small victory, but it's significant for me- I have never completed any sort of training program before. Now I have a wider area of job opportunity and i...	RainyJamie	6	319	May 7, 2007 by Rita G
	Did you ever receive amends??? (Preview) Heartbroken in NJ reminded me of this question. My AH never made amends to me. Of all people in his life, the mother of his child, the woman who was his friend/lover and wife for way over thirty years, never received one. He even made amends to his horrible dysfunctional family members who surely did not...	debilyn	11	1180	May 7, 2007 by hudsond
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.