Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

I am still covering AH's health insurance. It doesn't cost me anything. I have good coverage..for now anyway. as you all know, he hasn't worked since January. Why should I continue to cover him even if it doesn't cost me anything? Well...it costs $10 for every dental visit, but thats it. I am wonderin...

el-cee · el-cee

When will I be done? I mean, the residual crap caused by this disease lingers on in me and im sick of it. Im angry again because I thought I would invite my ex to dinner for christmas, I know its early but theres been drama around it the last 2 yrs so I think, im going to be a big grown up woman, pull up my big pants...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am struggling w/ the same regrets from the past. I hope someone on here has similar experiences so I can see a different point of view. Sometimes I get stuck. One of the main issues I have & will probably always have, is the fact that I am basically barren. I cannot have children. I don't want to adopt...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I have been very protective of my tenants, saying I will not allow them to be homeless and was holding out as long as I could. They have a nice rv on my property. There has been no threat of fines or court or anything. With out any notice, owing me $300 they just took off with their rv and left. nice eh? They are...

laguillotina · laguillotina

i haven't been to an Al Anon meeting in a long time. The last time I was at these boards was a year ago. I just need someone to read this and maybe tell me I'm not crazy? or if I am crazy, that I will get better soon? I traded in an alcoholic for a rageholic. We've been together for 4 years. In the beginning of Sept...

pinkchip · pinkchip

I got that job at the rehab as clinical director. Was all set to leave with Monday as my last day. We had a conference call today statewide for the current company I work for. The statewide COO was on that call. It was acknowledged I was leaving. 10 minutes after, the state COO called me and offered to match...

astallaslions · astallaslions

The hardest thing about being sick and sad on my favorite holiday and what was suppose to be our 3 year anniversary was that he wasnt there to take care of me, and that even if he had been, it probably would have not been what I hoped for. I miss his smile and his eyes and right now I feel him here with me ever so p...

Jerry F · Jerry F

anything you have to calm my mind, body, spirit and emotions. That's what I was praying yesterday after a major reaction spiced by my PTSD disability. One of the guys where I work made the decision to target and victimize me with a delusion he was entertaining and then finished it off with a threat t...

Luiza · Luiza

My daughter is 7. I wish her to grow into a responsible, confident adult with high self esteem knowing that she is capable of wonderful things and worth of good in her life. How can I help her achieving it? I guess what I am asking is, why the opposite happens? Why some people- like her father and myself- ha...

likemyheart · likemyheart

The bestest most favoritest holiday ever! Ghoulies and ghosties of all sorts came to my door and I played with them and tested their ability to laugh! I love Halloween! This picture ISN'T sideways on my computer, I promise! -- -- Edited by likemyheart on Friday 31st of October 2014 11:55:57 PM

el-cee · el-cee

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQh-VDcpkyw Hey alcohol, You have no power over me!!!

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Or at least they do me .. LOL! Last night after getting the kids to where they need to be and a seriously crazy work week I was able to breathe at the meeting I attend. We all had a great evening! My son went trick or treating with a group of his friends with no adults (they were at his friends new house very,...

Katy · Katy

I react because I feel attacked, as a person my whole being feels violated, that is my responce to someone not understanding me or knowing me well enough to know that by singling me out they challenge my very being, I don't ever go looking for trouble and I would avoid it at all costs but every now and then I...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

the XAH, .. I'd be ok with that however he just won't leave me alone! UGH!! Last night he texts as I'm out running the kids to and from places, and honestly I'm ignoring it. It's about money in terms of he wants to give me some. The problem is he doesn't follow the rules and he doesn't do what he's suppo...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Bowie's new accessory. It works great for halloween, everyone is calling him hannibal. He doesn't think it's particularly funny. Poor guy lol. I will have to talk to him about acceptance.

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I've been having a full week. I'm very excited to be done with my former workplace. I got more done on Monday than I have on an weekend recently. I felt serene, cooked up a bunch of goodies, cleaned my closet, went for walks, got to more meetings etc. I found out my friend from work's hubby works for our co...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just sitting here so I thought I would post. I am sore. It is difficult to sit on these chairs at the library. I am getting ready to go now. I just wanted to post to let everyone know that I am doing OK. Mom is not back yet. I don't know when they will release her. The powers that be will not tell me anything. I am n...

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

Well technically I am divorced .. however it's not signed yet and it will be big time. Anyway, XAH is as crazy as you wanna be and that's ok as long as it keeps it to himself .. sharing is so overrated!! There is has been a LOT going on some of which I still can't talk about, that's ok too. My mom sent me a lovel...

texasgal · texasgal

I've been dating a man for more than a month he is wonderful he is complete opposite of my exAH. I'm very grateful for all the little things he does he is so caring and thoughtful. The problem is me. Sometimes he does something so nice and so opposite of what my ex would and I catch myself wanting to cry. I wan...

mjferg · mjferg

So, I am new to this, and I will be honest as I said in another post, I feel like a bug on the bottom of someone's shoe.I cry allot and I feel sick. I have rough nights and I am weary. I guess I need to hear how everyone else felt when they started and how they got better.

SerenityRUS · SerenityRUS

I have an apartment sized kitchen trying to fit a garbage bag full of plastic containers into a cabinet that holds both my glass ware and anything plastic. Literally it's the only cabinet available to deal with this issue. I'm debating if I should just donate the whole garbage bag of containers and g...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Page 304, October 30, the ODAAT in Al-Anon daily reader. This is what the program and MIP is all about. Mahalo John for willingly being that instrument which the Just For Today prayer speaks of. Grateful beyond words and not done yet. (((((hugs)))))

aim2009 · aim2009

I can't seem to scrape myself off the bottom. My alcoholic has been sober for 24 days. I should be celebrating, but I'm in tears, I feel so bad I almost want to end the relationship. I never felt this alone when he was drinking and I'm so confused. I know I'm doing something wrong, but I don't know what i...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Hello everyone! I have just gotten internet access after a few days so here's my ramble about what's been going on. I've just completed day 1 of my new "A-free" life. I spent half the day with A though, so, it doesn't count. Anyway I'll pick up where I left off, last Saturday when A was prancin...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

3 years of program work can disappear on me. I'm the one who made the decision to leave my AH. I'm the one who has chosen not to respond to correspondence since I ended joint counseling. I'm the one who made the mistake of responding to an I love you text that I received this Tuesday after finding out Sunday...

Aquastrm · Aquastrm

Hello all again, last time I was here was in 2009 fast forward to 2014. Things have gotten worse this time the AH is sitting in jail as he has another DUI this time during work, the one thing i am so proud of myself I didnt move heaven and earth to bail him out..and when another family member was going to i stat...

LinSC · LinSC

And they tell you I am an alcoholic or a recovering addict, why do they tell you? What are they really saying? " If you stick with me I may relapse, I may slip? Are you gonna stick with me and give me your all? Can you enable me? Why do they come forth and tell you who they are on the very first meeting or dat...

el-cee · el-cee

When I lived with my ex ah I used to say sorry quite a lot. I took the blame quite a lot, usually to keep the peace or to end the silent treatment or sometimes because the guilt got the better out of me. I never really meant it. I never really believed I owed it not really. I always thought my bad behaviour or har...

el-cee · el-cee

I listened to a talk talk today by a real life explorer, he was amazing to listen to. He went to the south pole alone and he frequently goes to the north pole and hes like us, he has that spiritual thing going on that we have. It got me thinking that maybe its only through a really hard journey are we able to see...

Flower49 · Flower49

Hi everyone, been a bit since I have been here and I can tell you I notice the difference of relaxing in my recovery! Right now I feel like scrambled eggs for sure! I have my AH in a 3/4 way house who wants me to just go along with everything they do and say even if it doesn't feel right to me. So for example, he is...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hello all, Scanning the threads I see a lot of topics from folks who are in a place I remember being. I like where I am at and for me it is important to my recovery to not forget about where I have been least I forget what that path looks like and make choices that lead me back there. I know me and I know my form of t...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I generally cycle into a funk at the end of October, 12 years ago it started with losing a pregnancy in my second trimester and the next day my dad died suddenly while we were on our way driving across country to live with him for a time until we got jobs lined up, but my exAH started drinking heavy with the...

aquamom23 · aquamom23

I had a lovely three hours to myself without children. This doesn't happen often enough. I think its the fourth time in two years. Sometimes one or two of my little ducklings will be at daycare and that's half a break. But time completely alone,no pram to navigate,no toddler to chide for squealing in a p...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

Please help me have some self control. I see my AH talking with people on facebook and I want to spit. Ok, I'm going to just come out and say it. Maybe I already have, I don't remember. AH and I were coworkers. He got fired in March. I am still there, working at the same place and trying not to lose it!! Some da...

el-cee · el-cee

This question was asked in my meeting tonight. I thought I would share it with you and see what you think.x

eriegroupgirl · eriegroupgirl

That's a lot of meetings to miss after ten years of alanon. It will be interesting to see how far astray I am as this disease tears it's ugly monster head at my son. My Dad was a 30 year AA member. He died on April 30 this year. I messed up with my son today. I fee terrible. I don't deserve help tonight, but I am so...

missmeliss · missmeliss

It's not even 24 hours and his brother is messaging me. OMG, we can't do this, we're getting married, we need our house back. He left here having drunk 1 bottle of wine, he bought 3, I guess he drank the rest on the way and at their house. I feel sad for him, I know how to handle him, but it isn't my job anymore. ...

neshema2 · neshema2

This is so unreal I go to goodwill to donate some clothing and i hear this "squeak squeak" sound and i know its an animal, most likely a dog and so i follow the sound...i find a dog in 77 degree weather, in the sun, locked in a black dodge caravan NO windows down, not even a crack and doggie sees...

missmeliss · missmeliss

This will sound deranged but, Cat Lady reared her head again just as we were moving out. Michael Douglas escaped and didn't come back for a couple of days and I started recieving messages from Cat Lady again. It had been months since I had heard from her. I was so upset and so worried, but her messages were...

mjferg · mjferg

I received a phone call from a mutual friend of my ex today, she lives with his brother and she hadn't seen me in a while.She told me she saw my ex with an old girl friend the other day, I am thinking that was awful fast we just broke up.I want to call and give him a piece of my mind so bad but I am sure it would only...

cloudyskies · cloudyskies

Detachment is a very important tool in my Al-Anon tool box. I live with active alcoholism, so I use detachment often. However, until recently I was not discerning the difference between physical and emotional detachment. When my husband drinks, I do something that helps me think about me. I love t...

Hopingfor · Hopingfor

Hello all, I joined this forum around December last year when I was at Rock bottom with my BF drinking habits. Everyone was really fantastic and helped me through such a bad time but the one thing I kept hearing was try and find a local meeting. I didn't know if I had the nerve and was unsure if I would be abl...

oceanpine · oceanpine

I have been lurking a bunch since posting midsummer. First I want to say how moved I DMV by the deep reservoir of patience, kindness and honesty some of the regulars demonstrate here to person after person!! Truly remarkable. I feel badly to take up people's time and then disappear. One reason is I usua...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

Just wanted to share about this to work through some things. We went to a wedding yesterday. It was for the daughter of of one of my former coworkers. My recovering abf is trying to get more accustomed to being in the presence of alcohol and being ok with it. So we're seated with some strangers who were als...

aquamom23 · aquamom23

I went back to the doctors. The last one was dismissive,your stressed,stop it. Yeah,that's gonna happen. I've been attending meetings online, I need a sponsor,I'm praying. Today I found another quack,he was kindly. He prescribed meds. I feel upset but I also know this hsomething I sadly need for th...

pinkchip · pinkchip

So I picked up a 6 year medallion at one of the groups I used to attend in my first year. Yes, it's AA, but it's still the 12 steps and the journey is not so different, as I was leaving an A at the same time and working on tremendous codependency issues also. In any case, the overwhelming feedback from all th...

alwaysLP13 · alwaysLP13

I've been in Al-Anon just a little over 2 years. August was my birthday month. I just have to say, that the experience, strength and hope I get from the program and the people of the program are just great. It's a day at time but just for today it's a good day. I wanted to share what I shared at my meeting and to...

one and only · one and only

Ive been on another site for 3 years..It was an infidelity site..Now our lives have shifted once again...ANd I no longer belong there...I have for the last 6 years, gone thru every emotion imagineable. Trying desperately to figure out why my marriage was falling apart. Why I no longer recognized my H...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

Some days, like today, I find myself feeling angry towards everyone. I just get sick of the same things over and over. I am realizing my best friend and her issues with her son are driving me nuts. Long story short, he is almost 18 and under house arrest with an ankle bracelet for drug possession. He is t...

Mirandac · Mirandac

I am working on forgiveness for my dry ah. First i need to forgive myself for my own past sins then forgive my ah for his current sins of adultery. I need to do this to move on, i will forgive him and hand him over to the care of God To deal with Him.I can not sit in judgement of AH it is not my job. i am doing this...

missmeliss · missmeliss

Just to clarify, I assumed A was going to stay at his brothers when he moved his big furniture out. I didn't know he planned to come back, but I have no legal right whatsoever to have him leave, he's a joint tenant, I'm not sure exactly how people think I would prevent him from coming and going from a house h...

LinSC · LinSC

There is a wisdom on this board that is given free with no attachments....this is a beautiful thing.

gardengal · gardengal

Made a searching and fearless inventory of ourselves......."Step 4" The greatest fault of all is to be conscious of none. In the past we have, perhaps, lived with the conviction that we were "always" right. Our tendency to self-justification may stem fromt hat. This situation may become complic...

jmsas · jmsas

Hello Everyone, I am a new member to this group. I have a few questions that I would greatly appreciate others feedback. First off, I am a single mother of 2 boys and have been single for about 3 years. A few months ago I began dating a guy who was upfront with me that he was a recovering addict. I thought...

Truth · Truth

Wow I don't even know long it has been since I posted!! I hope all is well in everyone's world......sending you all some light and love!!

Jerry F · Jerry F

Have been speaking with another one of us and listening; comparing notes and experiences part of which is the mental, emotional and physical side affects that event he non-drinker can suffer from directly related to "our part in it". The member caused me to inventory and remember wha...

Luiza · Luiza

Apparently I did voodoo... Would be funny if it wasn't sad. He has lost many phones and wallets over the years..I used to get so upset. Today I don't care. It is not my problem if he needs to spend money to buy a new one. It is so good to be free! By this time, next Sunday, this home will be all mine and I will pro...

jitsuka · jitsuka

Hi Been a while since I've posted or been on here ... life still plodding along but I seem to have had a bit of clarity of thought. The relationship in my mind has changed a bit. I used to say to myself that I still love the person, hate the disease etc etc ... I'm not so sure now. I've been feeling resentful, no...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Guts are better! Not as weak. Friends helped me get feed and grain. Pouring rain but we laughed a lot and had fun. They helped me bring it in. Then had a great lunch with my I love so much friend. Just had noodles, and splurged on the egg flower soup. I am a vegan but not radical. I needed that soup! (c: She is A b...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I just want to say to whomever wrote the post about the joy down in their heart & peace that passes understanding, thanks for bringing that up! It takes me back to when I was younger & we used to sing that song all the time. Right about now I need that peace. So much anxiety is passing through me that...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Health insurance...should I take him off? (Preview) I am still covering AH's health insurance. It doesn't cost me anything. I have good coverage..for now anyway. as you all know, he hasn't worked since January. Why should I continue to cover him even if it doesn't cost me anything? Well...it costs $10 for every dental visit, but thats it. I am wonderin...	Newlife girl	9	588	Nov 2, 2014 by neshema2
	is recovery never ending? (Preview) When will I be done? I mean, the residual crap caused by this disease lingers on in me and im sick of it. Im angry again because I thought I would invite my ex to dinner for christmas, I know its early but theres been drama around it the last 2 yrs so I think, im going to be a big grown up woman, pull up my big pants...	el-cee	15	577	Nov 2, 2014 by missmeliss
	same old regrets... (Preview) I am struggling w/ the same regrets from the past. I hope someone on here has similar experiences so I can see a different point of view. Sometimes I get stuck. One of the main issues I have & will probably always have, is the fact that I am basically barren. I cannot have children. I don't want to adopt...	Hoot Nanny	5	472	Nov 2, 2014 by mjferg
	Typical sucker me (Preview) I have been very protective of my tenants, saying I will not allow them to be homeless and was holding out as long as I could. They have a nice rv on my property. There has been no threat of fines or court or anything. With out any notice, owing me $300 they just took off with their rv and left. nice eh? They are...	Debilyn	10	572	Nov 2, 2014 by neshema2
	decision paralysis (Preview) i haven't been to an Al Anon meeting in a long time. The last time I was at these boards was a year ago. I just need someone to read this and maybe tell me I'm not crazy? or if I am crazy, that I will get better soon? I traded in an alcoholic for a rageholic. We've been together for 4 years. In the beginning of Sept...	laguillotina	12	421	Nov 1, 2014 by laguillotina
	So what happened with the job... (Preview) I got that job at the rehab as clinical director. Was all set to leave with Monday as my last day. We had a conference call today statewide for the current company I work for. The statewide COO was on that call. It was acknowledged I was leaving. 10 minutes after, the state COO called me and offered to match...	pinkchip	25	693	Nov 1, 2014 by grateful2be
	Nostalgia gives doubt about break up…love or self sabotage? (Preview) The hardest thing about being sick and sad on my favorite holiday and what was suppose to be our 3 year anniversary was that he wasnt there to take care of me, and that even if he had been, it probably would have not been what I hoped for. I miss his smile and his eyes and right now I feel him here with me ever so p...	astallaslions	3	520	Nov 1, 2014 by grateful2be
	God grant me... (Preview) anything you have to calm my mind, body, spirit and emotions. That's what I was praying yesterday after a major reaction spiced by my PTSD disability. One of the guys where I work made the decision to target and victimize me with a delusion he was entertaining and then finished it off with a threat t...	Jerry F	10	537	Nov 1, 2014 by Jerry F
	Confidence and Self-esteem. (Preview) My daughter is 7. I wish her to grow into a responsible, confident adult with high self esteem knowing that she is capable of wonderful things and worth of good in her life. How can I help her achieving it? I guess what I am asking is, why the opposite happens? Why some people- like her father and myself- ha...	Luiza	11	977	Nov 1, 2014 by Luiza
	hAPPY hALLOWEEN! (Preview) The bestest most favoritest holiday ever! Ghoulies and ghosties of all sorts came to my door and I played with them and tested their ability to laugh! I love Halloween! This picture ISN'T sideways on my computer, I promise! -- -- Edited by likemyheart on Friday 31st of October 2014 11:55:57 PM	likemyheart	6	267	Nov 1, 2014 by grateful2be
	This is me. (Preview) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQh-VDcpkyw Hey alcohol, You have no power over me!!!	el-cee	4	359	Nov 1, 2014 by grateful2be
	Things that make you go hmmm ... (Preview) Or at least they do me .. LOL! Last night after getting the kids to where they need to be and a seriously crazy work week I was able to breathe at the meeting I attend. We all had a great evening! My son went trick or treating with a group of his friends with no adults (they were at his friends new house very,...	SerenityRUS	10	538	Nov 1, 2014 by el-cee
	why do we react though! (Preview) I react because I feel attacked, as a person my whole being feels violated, that is my responce to someone not understanding me or knowing me well enough to know that by singling me out they challenge my very being, I don't ever go looking for trouble and I would avoid it at all costs but every now and then I...	Katy	2	438	Nov 1, 2014 by hotrod
	Still crazy .. (Preview) the XAH, .. I'd be ok with that however he just won't leave me alone! UGH!! Last night he texts as I'm out running the kids to and from places, and honestly I'm ignoring it. It's about money in terms of he wants to give me some. The problem is he doesn't follow the rules and he doesn't do what he's suppo...	SerenityRUS	0	348	Nov 1, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	Oh dear, my poor boy... (Preview) Bowie's new accessory. It works great for halloween, everyone is calling him hannibal. He doesn't think it's particularly funny. Poor guy lol. I will have to talk to him about acceptance.	missmeliss	12	1003	Oct 31, 2014 by grateful2be
	All Over the Map Emotionally (Preview) I've been having a full week. I'm very excited to be done with my former workplace. I got more done on Monday than I have on an weekend recently. I felt serene, cooked up a bunch of goodies, cleaned my closet, went for walks, got to more meetings etc. I found out my friend from work's hubby works for our co...	tiredtonite	7	531	Oct 31, 2014 by Jerry F
	just sitting here... (Preview) Just sitting here so I thought I would post. I am sore. It is difficult to sit on these chairs at the library. I am getting ready to go now. I just wanted to post to let everyone know that I am doing OK. Mom is not back yet. I don't know when they will release her. The powers that be will not tell me anything. I am n...	Hoot Nanny	2	404	Oct 31, 2014 by tiredtonite
	First week as a divorced woman :) (Preview) Well technically I am divorced .. however it's not signed yet and it will be big time. Anyway, XAH is as crazy as you wanna be and that's ok as long as it keeps it to himself .. sharing is so overrated!! There is has been a LOT going on some of which I still can't talk about, that's ok too. My mom sent me a lovel...	SerenityRUS	18	644	Oct 31, 2014 by Jerry F
	moving forward (Preview) I've been dating a man for more than a month he is wonderful he is complete opposite of my exAH. I'm very grateful for all the little things he does he is so caring and thoughtful. The problem is me. Sometimes he does something so nice and so opposite of what my ex would and I catch myself wanting to cry. I wan...	texasgal	4	520	Oct 31, 2014 by hotrod
	I need encouragement (Preview) So, I am new to this, and I will be honest as I said in another post, I feel like a bug on the bottom of someone's shoe.I cry allot and I feel sick. I have rough nights and I am weary. I guess I need to hear how everyone else felt when they started and how they got better.	mjferg	15	553	Oct 31, 2014 by mjferg
	Organization .. HELP!! (Preview) I have an apartment sized kitchen trying to fit a garbage bag full of plastic containers into a cabinet that holds both my glass ware and anything plastic. Literally it's the only cabinet available to deal with this issue. I'm debating if I should just donate the whole garbage bag of containers and g...	SerenityRUS	12	670	Oct 31, 2014 by Hoot Nanny
	Mahalo - Thank you all (Preview) Page 304, October 30, the ODAAT in Al-Anon daily reader. This is what the program and MIP is all about. Mahalo John for willingly being that instrument which the Just For Today prayer speaks of. Grateful beyond words and not done yet. (((((hugs)))))	Jerry F	12	578	Oct 31, 2014 by Hoot Nanny
	If everything is great, why do I feel so awful? (Preview) I can't seem to scrape myself off the bottom. My alcoholic has been sober for 24 days. I should be celebrating, but I'm in tears, I feel so bad I almost want to end the relationship. I never felt this alone when he was drinking and I'm so confused. I know I'm doing something wrong, but I don't know what i...	aim2009	7	611	Oct 31, 2014 by milkwood
	Hello Possums (Preview) Hello everyone! I have just gotten internet access after a few days so here's my ramble about what's been going on. I've just completed day 1 of my new "A-free" life. I spent half the day with A though, so, it doesn't count. Anyway I'll pick up where I left off, last Saturday when A was prancin...	missmeliss	16	528	Oct 31, 2014 by missmeliss
	It's amazing how fast... (Preview) 3 years of program work can disappear on me. I'm the one who made the decision to leave my AH. I'm the one who has chosen not to respond to correspondence since I ended joint counseling. I'm the one who made the mistake of responding to an I love you text that I received this Tuesday after finding out Sunday...	Jackie11	10	776	Oct 31, 2014 by Jackie11
	Back again... (Preview) Hello all again, last time I was here was in 2009 fast forward to 2014. Things have gotten worse this time the AH is sitting in jail as he has another DUI this time during work, the one thing i am so proud of myself I didnt move heaven and earth to bail him out..and when another family member was going to i stat...	Aquastrm	3	407	Oct 30, 2014 by Jerry F
	When you date someone who is a recovering from something (Preview) And they tell you I am an alcoholic or a recovering addict, why do they tell you? What are they really saying? " If you stick with me I may relapse, I may slip? Are you gonna stick with me and give me your all? Can you enable me? Why do they come forth and tell you who they are on the very first meeting or dat...	LinSC	10	582	Oct 30, 2014 by Newlife girl
	saying sorry (Preview) When I lived with my ex ah I used to say sorry quite a lot. I took the blame quite a lot, usually to keep the peace or to end the silent treatment or sometimes because the guilt got the better out of me. I never really meant it. I never really believed I owed it not really. I always thought my bad behaviour or har...	el-cee	9	605	Oct 30, 2014 by bud
	role models (Preview) I listened to a talk talk today by a real life explorer, he was amazing to listen to. He went to the south pole alone and he frequently goes to the north pole and hes like us, he has that spiritual thing going on that we have. It got me thinking that maybe its only through a really hard journey are we able to see...	el-cee	11	409	Oct 30, 2014 by neshema2
	Scrambled Eggs (Preview) Hi everyone, been a bit since I have been here and I can tell you I notice the difference of relaxing in my recovery! Right now I feel like scrambled eggs for sure! I have my AH in a 3/4 way house who wants me to just go along with everything they do and say even if it doesn't feel right to me. So for example, he is...	Flower49	2	405	Oct 30, 2014 by bud
	What do you do? (Preview) Hello all, Scanning the threads I see a lot of topics from folks who are in a place I remember being. I like where I am at and for me it is important to my recovery to not forget about where I have been least I forget what that path looks like and make choices that lead me back there. I know me and I know my form of t...	Mandy123	8	533	Oct 30, 2014 by bud
	I am having a hard time right now in my life (Preview) I generally cycle into a funk at the end of October, 12 years ago it started with losing a pregnancy in my second trimester and the next day my dad died suddenly while we were on our way driving across country to live with him for a time until we got jobs lined up, but my exAH started drinking heavy with the...	Breakingfree	24	818	Oct 30, 2014 by Breakingfree
	so good to get a break (Preview) I had a lovely three hours to myself without children. This doesn't happen often enough. I think its the fourth time in two years. Sometimes one or two of my little ducklings will be at daycare and that's half a break. But time completely alone,no pram to navigate,no toddler to chide for squealing in a p...	aquamom23	8	446	Oct 30, 2014 by grateful2be
	I am so angry And I want everyone to know the truth!! (Preview) Please help me have some self control. I see my AH talking with people on facebook and I want to spit. Ok, I'm going to just come out and say it. Maybe I already have, I don't remember. AH and I were coworkers. He got fired in March. I am still there, working at the same place and trying not to lose it!! Some da...	Newlife girl	7	527	Oct 30, 2014 by Breakingfree
	What rewards did you get from the victim role? ( 1 2 ) (Preview) This question was asked in my meeting tonight. I thought I would share it with you and see what you think.x	el-cee	44	1694	Oct 30, 2014 by hotrod
	skipped 18 years of meetings (Preview) That's a lot of meetings to miss after ten years of alanon. It will be interesting to see how far astray I am as this disease tears it's ugly monster head at my son. My Dad was a 30 year AA member. He died on April 30 this year. I messed up with my son today. I fee terrible. I don't deserve help tonight, but I am so...	eriegroupgirl	10	511	Oct 30, 2014 by Jerry F
	lol (Preview) It's not even 24 hours and his brother is messaging me. OMG, we can't do this, we're getting married, we need our house back. He left here having drunk 1 bottle of wine, he bought 3, I guess he drank the rest on the way and at their house. I feel sad for him, I know how to handle him, but it isn't my job anymore. ...	missmeliss	17	711	Oct 30, 2014 by Diva
	I'M NOT JOKING!! I nearly got into a fight today (Preview) This is so unreal I go to goodwill to donate some clothing and i hear this "squeak squeak" sound and i know its an animal, most likely a dog and so i follow the sound...i find a dog in 77 degree weather, in the sun, locked in a black dodge caravan NO windows down, not even a crack and doggie sees...	neshema2	13	581	Oct 30, 2014 by Diva
	Also a little update about Michael Douglas (Preview) This will sound deranged but, Cat Lady reared her head again just as we were moving out. Michael Douglas escaped and didn't come back for a couple of days and I started recieving messages from Cat Lady again. It had been months since I had heard from her. I was so upset and so worried, but her messages were...	missmeliss	12	421	Oct 29, 2014 by ClearTheFog
	trying not to react (Preview) I received a phone call from a mutual friend of my ex today, she lives with his brother and she hadn't seen me in a while.She told me she saw my ex with an old girl friend the other day, I am thinking that was awful fast we just broke up.I want to call and give him a piece of my mind so bad but I am sure it would only...	mjferg	6	477	Oct 29, 2014 by mjferg
	physical detachment / emotional detachment (Preview) Detachment is a very important tool in my Al-Anon tool box. I live with active alcoholism, so I use detachment often. However, until recently I was not discerning the difference between physical and emotional detachment. When my husband drinks, I do something that helps me think about me. I love t...	cloudyskies	6	1222	Oct 29, 2014 by grateful2be
	Such a change! (Preview) Hello all, I joined this forum around December last year when I was at Rock bottom with my BF drinking habits. Everyone was really fantastic and helped me through such a bad time but the one thing I kept hearing was try and find a local meeting. I didn't know if I had the nerve and was unsure if I would be abl...	Hopingfor	4	356	Oct 29, 2014 by grateful2be
	Heavy denial, about animals too (Preview) I have been lurking a bunch since posting midsummer. First I want to say how moved I DMV by the deep reservoir of patience, kindness and honesty some of the regulars demonstrate here to person after person!! Truly remarkable. I feel badly to take up people's time and then disappear. One reason is I usua...	oceanpine	4	333	Oct 29, 2014 by cloudyskies
	Healthy Socializing? (Preview) Just wanted to share about this to work through some things. We went to a wedding yesterday. It was for the daughter of of one of my former coworkers. My recovering abf is trying to get more accustomed to being in the presence of alcohol and being ok with it. So we're seated with some strangers who were als...	tiredtonite	5	546	Oct 29, 2014 by el-cee
	really need to get well (Preview) I went back to the doctors. The last one was dismissive,your stressed,stop it. Yeah,that's gonna happen. I've been attending meetings online, I need a sponsor,I'm praying. Today I found another quack,he was kindly. He prescribed meds. I feel upset but I also know this hsomething I sadly need for th...	aquamom23	7	552	Oct 29, 2014 by bud
	The program sinks in (Preview) So I picked up a 6 year medallion at one of the groups I used to attend in my first year. Yes, it's AA, but it's still the 12 steps and the journey is not so different, as I was leaving an A at the same time and working on tremendous codependency issues also. In any case, the overwhelming feedback from all th...	pinkchip	21	698	Oct 29, 2014 by grateful2be
	Al-Anon helps me self-acceptance acceptance blame (Preview) I've been in Al-Anon just a little over 2 years. August was my birthday month. I just have to say, that the experience, strength and hope I get from the program and the people of the program are just great. It's a day at time but just for today it's a good day. I wanted to share what I shared at my meeting and to...	alwaysLP13	6	5446	Oct 29, 2014 by Spur
	new here..very new (Preview) Ive been on another site for 3 years..It was an infidelity site..Now our lives have shifted once again...ANd I no longer belong there...I have for the last 6 years, gone thru every emotion imagineable. Trying desperately to figure out why my marriage was falling apart. Why I no longer recognized my H...	one and only	9	495	Oct 29, 2014 by hotrod
	Drama and flirting (Preview) Some days, like today, I find myself feeling angry towards everyone. I just get sick of the same things over and over. I am realizing my best friend and her issues with her son are driving me nuts. Long story short, he is almost 18 and under house arrest with an ankle bracelet for drug possession. He is t...	Newlife girl	4	535	Oct 28, 2014 by andromeda
	Forgiveness (Preview) I am working on forgiveness for my dry ah. First i need to forgive myself for my own past sins then forgive my ah for his current sins of adultery. I need to do this to move on, i will forgive him and hand him over to the care of God To deal with Him.I can not sit in judgement of AH it is not my job. i am doing this...	Mirandac	16	537	Oct 28, 2014 by Mirandac
	Last ride on the crazy train. Oh by the way the man was nice but the lady is nicer. (Preview) Just to clarify, I assumed A was going to stay at his brothers when he moved his big furniture out. I didn't know he planned to come back, but I have no legal right whatsoever to have him leave, he's a joint tenant, I'm not sure exactly how people think I would prevent him from coming and going from a house h...	missmeliss	24	869	Oct 28, 2014 by Sweet Stanley
	What I Know (Preview) There is a wisdom on this board that is given free with no attachments....this is a beautiful thing.	LinSC	4	274	Oct 28, 2014 by cloudyskies
	OUR TENDENCY TO SELF-JUSTIFICATION (Preview) Made a searching and fearless inventory of ourselves......."Step 4" The greatest fault of all is to be conscious of none. In the past we have, perhaps, lived with the conviction that we were "always" right. Our tendency to self-justification may stem fromt hat. This situation may become complic...	gardengal	10	3963	Oct 28, 2014 by neshema2
	what to expect (Preview) Hello Everyone, I am a new member to this group. I have a few questions that I would greatly appreciate others feedback. First off, I am a single mother of 2 boys and have been single for about 3 years. A few months ago I began dating a guy who was upfront with me that he was a recovering addict. I thought...	jmsas	7	557	Oct 28, 2014 by Mattie
	So Grateful for Today!! (Preview) Wow I don't even know long it has been since I posted!! I hope all is well in everyone's world......sending you all some light and love!!	Truth	5	278	Oct 28, 2014 by andromeda
	Don't take this disease lightly... (Preview) Have been speaking with another one of us and listening; comparing notes and experiences part of which is the mental, emotional and physical side affects that event he non-drinker can suffer from directly related to "our part in it". The member caused me to inventory and remember wha...	Jerry F	10	642	Oct 28, 2014 by Flower49
	He lost his phone and says it is my fault... (Preview) Apparently I did voodoo... Would be funny if it wasn't sad. He has lost many phones and wallets over the years..I used to get so upset. Today I don't care. It is not my problem if he needs to spend money to buy a new one. It is so good to be free! By this time, next Sunday, this home will be all mine and I will pro...	Luiza	6	605	Oct 28, 2014 by jitsuka
	My A partner slipped outside, gone to A+E ... maybe a step nearer rockbottom. (Preview) Hi Been a while since I've posted or been on here ... life still plodding along but I seem to have had a bit of clarity of thought. The relationship in my mind has changed a bit. I used to say to myself that I still love the person, hate the disease etc etc ... I'm not so sure now. I've been feeling resentful, no...	jitsuka	17	746	Oct 28, 2014 by jitsuka
	all is well and share about my A friend (Preview) Guts are better! Not as weak. Friends helped me get feed and grain. Pouring rain but we laughed a lot and had fun. They helped me bring it in. Then had a great lunch with my I love so much friend. Just had noodles, and splurged on the egg flower soup. I am a vegan but not radical. I needed that soup! (c: She is A b...	Debilyn	5	505	Oct 27, 2014 by bud
	who wrote on a post about peace that passes understanding? (Preview) I just want to say to whomever wrote the post about the joy down in their heart & peace that passes understanding, thanks for bringing that up! It takes me back to when I was younger & we used to sing that song all the time. Right about now I need that peace. So much anxiety is passing through me that...	Hoot Nanny	3	311	Oct 27, 2014 by LinSC
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.