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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Asked to have some private time with my child---he toook all the money he promised and said __ you.
Post Info TOPIC: Asked to have some private time with my child---he toook all the money he promised and said __ you.
hippietrippiechick


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Asked to have some private time with my child---he toook all the money he promised and said __ you.
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My daughter came over for a while tonight and  just wanted some time with her. All I wanted. But he took it all wrong.

I have docs appts tomorrow and am supposed to pick up my meds and stuff. He got his ride out, promptly grabbbed his check ( shoudn't have but he had close to $300 in his wallet before check came.) A few minutes before he asked, " have I ever let you down when it comes to money,, i had to say no.

He stilll has his key but I am getting ready for bed. All windows and doors are bolted shut---he cant get in--I hope.

Now I am scared. I want to go to bed but I don't want to have to deal with with major knocks on the door & all the BS coming--if it does.

Some one please help. He was supposed to have beeen dropped off near me to give me my key and give me money. He has  not shown up and it has been almost 2 hours.

Screw him I am not jepordizing my sanity or my sleep for him.

I have the right things not in sight.

someone please help. I will call the cops if he gets volotile tonight, but I need some help



-- Edited by tea2 at 07:47, 2007-01-19

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This is HippieTrippieChick Signing Off Be blessed and have a wonderful day. Remember God loves you. PEACE
tea2


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RE: Asked to have some private time with my child---he toook all the money he promised and said f**k you.
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This is some valuable information, they can answer questions, please consider contacting them for additional recourses.

1-800-903-0111 Battered Womens Justice Project. 
National Organization for Victims Assistance is 1-800-TRY-NOVA 
National Resource Center for Domestic Violence at 1-800-537-2238
US Domestic Violence Hotline/ General Information 800-799-7233 

World Service Organization Website - WWW.al-anon.alateen.org  / Phone number is 1-888-425-2666



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serenity is a gift
hippietrippiechick


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RE: Asked to have some private time with my child---he toook all the money he promised and said ___ you.
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now he is in a motel just up the road. I have been calling and calling. I told him unless I got my key and some money he would not be let in to get his stuff. I called over and 0ver and over and over and over and over and over...........I even threatened to kill myself, which at this point don't look like such a bad idea, but I have things to do. I don't want to do it over a man. My phone died in the middle of one of my many suicide threats, he said he was gonna call my dad. I hung up and immediately left message on dad's recorder that anything he said was BS. He knows that Charlie has a problem. I am so tired. just want to go to bed. Can seem to let go. I haven't a dime to my name and how am I even gonna get my meds or shop or anything. This <edited> leaving me hi and dry just over my daughter. so stupid. I have had suidicidal thoughts though. Won't deny it. Just want to go to sleep.

(edited for language)



-- Edited by tea2 at 18:29, 2007-01-19

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This is HippieTrippieChick Signing Off Be blessed and have a wonderful day. Remember God loves you. PEACE
nmike


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RE: Asked to have some private time with my child---he toook all the money he promised and said f**k you.
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(((((hippie))))

Breathe in and breathe out is what I have been told. Can you get to a f2f meeting for support? People there will understand and be there for you. Hang in there.

In support,

Nancy



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annmarie


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((((Hippie)))),

I'm so sorry you are going through this. When I was in a similar position to yourself I couldn't see clearly in the midst of the chaos. There was no rational thinking.

I had to get away for a while....went to my sis for a couple of nights...and regained some sanity and perspective. I know this might not be so easy for you to do given your situation, but it was all that worked for me at the time. Just clear time to think, to plan my next step.

Do what you have to do to keep you and your child safe. There are lots of supports around if we ask for them.

He is going to do whatever he is going to do. He is gripped by his addiction. You have to look after yourself first.

You are in my prayers. I hope you find guidance and strength.

Yours in recovery

AM 

   

 



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hippietrippiechick


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Thank  God my daughter doesn't have to live in all this. She lives with my parents. I just needed to see her. What was the big deal?

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carolena


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RE: Asked to have some private time with my child---he toook all the money he promised and said __ you.
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Sweetie - you need professional help - please get involved with a women's shelter or dv hotline NOW.

 

Shelters have good therapy groups w/o having to live there.  

Most operate on a sliding fee scale or if you have no income, it's free.    Please check this out.    They're listed in your local phone book and online. 

 

My prayers are with you.   Many hugs from one whose been there, done that, also ALANON -- it worked for me. 



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gardengal


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((((((((hippie)))))) you must get help that you need. It is obvious that you are living in utter chaos and not thinking clearly. One minute you want him to leave and the next you are calling him????? As for your fear to call the cops as you have marijuana: and you did mention that your doctor is aware of this, get a doctor's note so YOU are protected if the need arises to call the cops. As for the money situation, as a disabled person I am sure you qualify for relief from the government. There are many avenues you can seek help for yourself without living in this day in and day out. You must believe what we say here is to help you get out of this perpetual hell and get some peace and serenity in your life,,,as we all have been right where you are in our mental states. We can only make suggestions and the rest is up to you. Only YOU can help yourself. Now I ask what can you do for just YOU today to make things seem a bit brighter? I would like to hear about that..........................

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tea2


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Hippie,
I have been following your posts/ shares. PLEASE call these #'s for you. This is the best advice I can give. Do it for you.
The DV #'s I gave are confidential with any/ all info you choose to disclose with them.
I will repeat them here again:

1-800-903-0111 Battered Womens Justice Project. 
National Organization for Victims Assistance is 1-800-TRY-NOVA 
National Resource Center for Domestic Violence at 1-800-537-2238
* US Domestic Violence Hotline/ General Information 800-799-7233 *  (I would start with this one, asap)
There is SO much they can help you with, At the least it is worth the call

World Service Organization Website - WWW.al-anon.alateen.org  / Phone number is 1-888-425-2666

 



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serenity is a gift
tea2


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Hippie,
It's hard for me not to speak from the angle of giving advice with this. I am sharing with hope for your safety  -and because I feel you are continually asking for help here in your posts.
For your best interest -during this time, this is the best I can offer
In Al-Anon we do not advise someone, we share our experience, strength and hope (e, s and h) One reason is -What works for one may not work well for another. Although there are exceptions and what you are sharing, imo, is one of these exceptions.
This is a brief quote taken from:
How Al-Anon Works for Families and  Friends of Alcoholics (Preface ix)
A Special Word to Anyone Confronted with Violence

TAPPING OTHER RESOURSES
"In time we discover that the principles of our program can be practiced in all our affairs. But there are times when, in order to work through especially challenging circumstances, we may need more specialized help and support, such as therapy or legal counsel. Many of us benefited from taking care of these needs in addition to coming to Al-Anon."
From:
Courage to Change (p 273)
”There is hope, there is help, and I have an inalienable right to human dignity.”
                                                                                 …In All Our Affairs

 



-- Edited by tea2 at 18:49, 2007-01-19

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maresie2


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I can definitely relate to your feelings of abandonment.  My A used to be able to push all my abandonment buttons.  He would take off and I would immediately re-live my feelings of abandonment from childhood. Then I would call him compulsively.

I would also go into panic.

I can tell you this program helps.  I think it takes a while though.

I no longer feel a potential abandonment victim to the A.  I do feel more dependent than I'd like though.

Setting limits, creating separation is hard work.  I know it one day at a time one moment at a time.

I hope you can carve out a support network that can help you.  I went to counselor(s) in plural rather than just one counselor. 

I also for a time went to see a minister.  A friend of mine came up with a concept of a support team.  I like that.  I no longer feel as dependent on one person.  I also tried various forms of therapy. There is a therapy called diabletical behavior therapy there are many many many groups on the web that teach it.  Those concepts would help you with the "panic" you experience.

There is help, there is hope there is progress.  Take care of yourself.

Maresie.



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