The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hi, this is my first time at any type of Al-Anon message board. I haven't been to a meeting either. I read several postings and started to cry. I have felt so alone in this and a lot of what I read mirrored how I feel. It is nice to know that there are others who can understand what I live through everyday of my life. Living with an alcoholic can be emotionally, mentally, and physically draining. But I stay because of the love that I feel and because I hope that things will change. I don't know why I still believe that things can change. I'm hoping that if nothing else, I can change my way of thinking so that I won't be hurt or disappointed anymore. A lot of times I just try to turn off my thoughts and emotions so that I don't feel anything at all. But I know it's always there, I even dream about it almost every night. Maybe one day my only wish will come true... or maybe not.
Welcome to MIP, and the cool thing about your post, is that the program of recovery, for you, WILL give you that change that you are hoping and longing for.... No telling whether or not your A will choose recovery for himself as well, but there IS solid hope for you. Please keep coming back here, posting as you see fit, and reading all you can. One awesome book, particularly since you are living with an active alcoholic, would be "Getting Them Sober", volume one, by Toby Rice Drews. It was an absolute lifesaver from me, and helped me understand that I was not alone in this journey.....
I wish you well....
Tom
"He is either gonna drink, or he won't... what are YOU gonna do?"
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"He is either gonna drink, or he won't.... what are YOU gonna do?"
"What you think of me is none of my business"
"If you knew the answer to what you are worrying about, would it REALLY change anything?"
Welcome to the family. Here you will find great strength, hope, experience, love and a bit of humor (good for the soul).
It's so awful to feel the way you do. Alot of this have been there. Alot of us have come out the other side. As Tom suggested there are many great books out there to read. The more familiar you become with this disease, the better off you will be. You might start with the Blye Book for AA, read the chapters on wives and families. Also Lois Remembers is another great one.
I tell this to every new person that finds their way here: You must not loose yourself in their disease. Your recovery has to be about you, regardless if the addict choose sobriety or not. You can't Cure it. You can't Control it. You didn't Cause it.
There are many tools we Alanoners keep in our tool box. Things to help us make it through the tough times, as well as everyday survival tools. Please check your local area for some face-to-face meetings. Come join us for chat or our online meetings.
Do not dispair, there is always hope. Recovery for you is absolutely possible. This programs works if you work it. It has help me, emmensely. Please take the time to take care of yourself. Do something special just for you: ie. take a bubble bath, eat ice cream, take a long nap, whatever you like to do. Being good to ourselves is so important to our recovery.
Live strong,
Karilynn
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
Here are some things that have helped me since in the program.
Go face to face meeting & online meeting.
post on the board here on the site. I have gotten a lot of good feed back.
· In this program u learn that u have choices. In Alanon we don’t give advice but only suggestions.
· Set support system. people do not judge. You need someone who can go for coffee on a bad day, or pick up a phone and call when in trouble. The support is what is important when you first this program.
Have a sponsor. Someone work one on one with you.
You don’t have to do this the minute u come to the program but I suggest that u do it when u can. It help.
Meeting schedule: meetings are in here and run approximately 90 minutes from: Monday-Friday, 9 am and 9 pm EST, Saturday: 10 am and 9 pm EST, Sunday: 10 am and 7 pm EST. Topics are selected by participants at meeting time. UK +5 hours, central -1 hour, mountain -2 hours, pacific -3 hours. Open chat all other times.
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Hey everyone watch me grow. I go thru good & bad times. each day i am getting stronger.
Welcome! I'm glad you are here. You'll find lots of good people who understand here. I know how hard it is to feel alone, it gets much better. Your in my thoughts and prayers.