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Feeling very powerless at the moment. This week has been pretty intense....as usual, I am not getting much sleep. I feel like I am being #$@! on right now, that someone somewhere is having a good laugh at my misery and my stress. So much is just going sideways, like nothing is ment to go right this week. I find myself constantly asking, why me??????? I am trying to do things right. Im still not smoking, I am not getting overly upset with my A, but still, I feel so overwhelmed and am at a breaking point right now. I am doing so much to change myself, is this not good enough?????????? What more must I do????
Congrats on the quitting smoking!!! Good for you. the withdrawls are probably contributing to how you are feeling but I can't really say as I don't know what is going on... I am sure that no one is is having a good laugh at you misery but I have had that feeling myself and that to shall pass. You know as I know that HP has a plan and that these things all happen for a reason how ever crapy they are. I have looked back into the crap of my past and now can honestly say OH Ya OK. Its surviving the bad and comming out stronger and wiser in the end that is the pay off for all the bad... Keep looking arfter U!!
I know exactly what you mean. Starting with A's hospitalization, disability shut off, then laid off and 2 totaled cars...I feel ya!! I just kept on thinking "This too shall pass" and ya know ((buzz)) it does eventually.
My son said (after 2 totaled cars that weren't his fault).."Sheesh!! does HP hate me or what"? I said "no, maybe he was sparing your life.. Who knows? Had you had those cars maybe something awful may have happened to you". I don't know , I don't have the answers and can only guess as to why things go like they do. Sometimes we can't even figure out the lesson. I think sometimes we are a tool being used to teach someone else's lesson.. I just know that it passes, always..
Love you ((buzzerbrown)) Christy
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If we think that miracles are normal, we will expect them. And expecting a miracle is the surest way to get one.
When you are a young adult it takes time to learn how to roll with the punches in life.
I like cjo's attitude..."this too shall pass". When you have been at it a while you can look at a week like the one you have had...and remember others you had like it...and remember that you survived and that you had quite a few good weeks later on.
Still...it is tough when you are going through it.
You are doing the right thing to stay smoke free...you don't want to engage in habits that will make your future weeks more miserable.
Keep taking care of you. Sleep when you can...eat healthy , and vent to your friends and let them comfort you. Soon things will get better...they always do!
I feel like I am being tested too. Come on down and mow my yard you will feel better! It could use a professional just once. God does not give us more than we can handle, we just have to wait for his time, not ours to turn it around!! We do learn through the pain and suffering.
oreos, oreos, oreos!!!
Josey
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Julianne - It's best to move on. You cannot look back in anger in life. It's too short
Why me? That is such a good question, be open to the answer Remember it is the cracking of the egg that gives the birdie the strength she needs to fly. The intensity you feel, mirrored in the world by the news focus on strife, seems harsh, and hard. This is not to say it isn't difficult, I am simply reminded by your courage to ask, that it is easy to be tricked into thinking about what's wrong, and wondering why it won't become better. If your house was on fire, would you stay inside and burn, or find a way to get some water!!
Here's something I am reminded of whenever I see your name on the screen: here is a fantastic young man, adjusting beautifully to big challenges, bringing hope humor and openness to others, continuously upbeat, and busy taking on his life, with love in his heart. All the rest is eggs crackin' buddy
Maybe you are being too hard on yourself. Remember Easy Does It.This is a lifelong program and you will change all through your life.When it feels like everything is against you that is when you need to do things FOR YOU.Take care of yourself.Try to have some fun.
I have had those times as well when it seems the universe is conspiring against me.That is when you need to grab your HP and HOLD ON.Keep doing the next right thing as they say,one day at a time.You will come through this better than you were.
Congratulations stopping smoking is very difficult and you should be commended. !! :)
I agree that your cravings are probably contributing to the feelings that you are having.. Try to be patient with yourself and remember one minute at a time !!
Sh****t week or month - yeah - Btdt too. Sorry it's rough for ya now. I want to add a couple of slogans to what has been said,HALT - and easy does it -to take care of you. Be gentle with yourself. Surrender all the sh**t to your HP. The stuff you're powerless over - just surrender or let go of. Vent it all out to your friends or whoever. Do something nice or fun for yourself.
I was asking why questions lately, but got no direct answer. I was trying to turn over the why's and stuff that I was powerless over to HP. I was trying to piece my life together and found 2 more puzzle pieces on the ground while walking the dog. Then a week later on TV, a man said "God sees you trying to put the puzzle together, but He has the box lid. He knows what the big picture is suppossed to look like." I understood that I didn't have to have all the answers, but I knew and trusted the one who did. I felt like HP was talking directly to me and I felt heard and loved. I just want to share my positive experience with this. The problems did not go away, but I am developing a deeper realtionship with my HP. I may hear a song that says just the word I need to bring peace or healing to my soul. I have to be open minded and listening to receive these gifts. TWYLALTR
I appreciate your energy and positive outlook on life. You have helped me many times by sharing what I needed to hear. You are an inspiration.
I too have known that feeling of powerlessness, frustration and being completely over-whelmed these past 2 weeks. Mainly this stems from the mess the doctors created when they treated hubby. I actually punched a pillow this week and it felt good!
All I know is that you have to take it One Moment at a Time. Forget the ODAT right now. It's minute by minute. You'll get through this. You're a strong human being.
Be extra good to yourself. (Buy that extra pizza and enjoy!) When things get the most stressful it's that time we need to be extra good to ourselves otherwise we have the potential to loose our way. Meanwhile, we've got your back.
Live strong,
Karilynn & Pipers Kitty
P.S. Perhaps a trip to the Mustard Museum is in order!
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It's your life. Take no prisoners. You will have it your way.
first off ~ love the new pic.... and then I have to say this. since day one that I was in chat and at some meetings.. I heard you share., you ask, you .. respond... from that day you became such an inspiration. ( ( (thats ME>>>>> haha!)))
Your view your humor.... just YOU! lol! Well all I felt was spunk and energy a kind of loving energy ~it flows~ right through the puter' even!! REALLY!
This one.... your post... (might be cravins..but just dont think so, been toooo long for that.) Congratulation for not smoking! Sooooo--- try working out.... sounds like could be some kind of "growin' pains." lol. That shall pass. HEY! ya need my punching bag.. and my gloves too !?!?! ((( )))
before~ and after- and anytime~ Literally for just a few minutes of time..precious precious time. I STOP MY thoughts. STOP EM'. ***inhale slowly..taking in FAITH *in my HP~ a deep breathe. AND THEN ***exhale slowly (too) letting go of any and all thoughts that are leading me to feel any kind of Fear! (no matter what it is.) Does that sound like some 5 minute success makin... by just doing a little self meditation? - lol.
STOP.....take a deep breathe of Faith and exhale the Fear. Cause it is just what it is.
I loves ya ! Thanks for being here! Miss seeing you, but I understand... hope your taking some YOU time for You. Its healthy you know!!
, and vent to your friends and let them comfort you. Soon things will get better...they always do!
Remember it is the cracking of the egg that gives the birdie the strength she needs to fly. The intensity you feel, mirrored in the world by the news focus on strife, seems harsh, and hard. This is not to say it isn't difficult, I am simply reminded by your courage to ask, that it is easy to be tricked into thinking about what's wrong, and wondering why it won't become better. If your house was on fire, would you stay inside and burn, or find a way to get some water!! 
Does that help?
) When things get the most stressful it's that time we need to be extra good to ourselves otherwise we have the potential to loose our way. Meanwhile, we've got your back.
and then I have to say this. since day one that I was in chat and at some meetings.. I heard you share., you ask, you .. respond... from that day you became such an inspiration. ( ( (thats ME>>>>>
haha!))) 
your humor.
... just YOU! 
lol! Well all I felt was spunk
energy
a kind of loving energy ~it flows~ right through the puter' even!! REALLY!
growin' pains." lol. That shall pass. HEY! ya need my punching bag.. and my gloves too !?!?! ((( 
)))
you know!
!