The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Is it normal to start healing, quit obsessing, completely detach and then question your love for your A?
My husband came to the house to meet with a lawyer regarding our "landlord". He was laying on the couch, and I went up to him and touched his leg, and said "hey you!" We were like good friends...just talking about nothing. We went to the meeting together, and I was completely focussed on the discussion at hand. I found his blunt comments to the lawyer as funny...not embarrassing. I did not feel the shakes, the giddiness of being with him...did not get upset when he said he needed to get to his truck because he had a meeting to get to with a business associate. I was detached, enjoyed his company, and he came back to the house to FINALLY get his things....I helped him out with the items, we talked briefly about where we were in this process, and he went back in to empty the fridge of beer....lol...it didn't bother me!!! I MEAN IT!
Is it normal to lose that passionate obsessiveness and addicted feeling and then wonder if you are really in love with someone?
I feel like i love him, but it is different! It isn't that consuming feeling I used to have. I can't explain it....
Does anyone else have any insight in their recovery that relates?
Dunno. I would give anything to not be so obsessive, addictive, to my A. I would love to be able to detach and just be an observer. You never know. Maybe your scenario has just played itself out; used up it's purpose. But somewhere in your post you do sound like you are healing.
I've had moments like that, sometimes when I see my A I am removed enough to feel that same way. Other times I slip back into old patterns. It is a really strange feeling but so nice to have those days. Thank you for sharing!
