The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Yesterday was Mother's Day, and what a wonderful day that is.......Hope all you fabulous mothers had a great day......
Hub called yesterday said, hope you are having a nice Mothers Day......I said, it's a fine day....at first I thought it was sarcastic...once I listened to his voice I knew it was sadness......Maybe, just maybe he is finally realizing what he lost. Maybe, it is finally hitting him what he gave up for the addiction........Maybe, he is finally having a time to think.......think of what he lost....think of how lonely he is....think of his kids and how fabulous they are and they hate him right now....he is welll aware of this fact.........
He absolutely without a doubt deserves every bit of this.....he should be sad, lonely and hurting...afterall the kids and I suffered, maybe that's mean but it is how I feel.
Who knows where life will go from here, I know absolutely this was the best thing I could have ever done, (What the hell took me so long)
Do not misunderstand, I love him and I miss him. However, the circle of addiction and the constant worry are gone and that is fabulous.....It is some what peaceful.....
This is such a wonderful place, It is so nice to be able just to let it out....
Thanks for your post. And your strength to make a good decision for you and your family. My AH chose his addiction (even though he is sober). He doesn't realize what he is losing. I hope to be stronger to make a similar decision. I am always impressed that even though Alanoners separate from their A's (even though it is a good decision) they are still able to say they love them and miss them. I am glad you have peace.
I'm so glad you had a good Mother's Day! I totally understand about not wanting to live within the circle of addiction. I'm glad you are experiencing peace too. Keep your eyes on God....He will continue to see you through.
We had a great visit with our son yesterday. At first I wasn't sure how it was going to go.....his birthday was Saturday (he is 20) and he called us that evening. He was having a hard time, it was his birthday and not home to celebrate with family etc. Anyway, we took a cake and gifts yesterday and everything was great. He looks good, talked a lot, smiled etc. He gave me a couple hugs and even got me a gift for Mother's Day! He still says he only wants to complete the three months and then come home, but we are praying he will finish the year program. He's half-way through this phase.
Take care friend.....Have a great week....hope to catch you one of these days in chat. Be confident of my prayers for you and your family. I'm praying for your hubby too.
Well Andrea , maybe is a mighty big question. Some A loose it all and still don't get it , some do . Maybe with this separation you will find that your going to be okay with out him after all . That was the most impowering thing I learned when my marriage fell apart a few yrs back and we were separated for 6 months .
I found ut that i was going to be okay with out him , he found out that home was where he wanted to be and became willing to do what he had to do to come back. And all of it was with out any help from me. Stepping aside and allowing them the dignity to live the way they choose is the hardest thing I have ever done in m y life. but necessary for me to recover.
All I had to do what get out of my own road . and just be. Louise