The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Oh I am so grateful for this program. I am beginning to love myself because of the positive changes
I had a pool Play date for 3 PM today with this lovely married couple that I am friends with. Theyre just kids but they are wonderful and very very moral and conscientious and Just good young people. Anyway I show up at three and theyre not there so no worries Ill jump in the pool and swim and they didnt show and they didnt show and they didnt show and Im like OK Im just gonna swim till about 4 PM and then Ill leave, something mustve happened, I hope they are OK, the old Rosie wouldve been thanking what defect is there of me that they couldnt show up and swim with me I wouldve been the what ifs and I wouldve gotten mad and all butt hurt that I was so called stood up
but none of that mental dysfunction came up. I just chatted with the folks who were there and then they came: my little friends showed up and they were like 45 minutes late LOL and they were so sorry and apologetic and I was just so happy to see them I just said to them that I was grateful they were OK and nothing happened and lets have some fun and I told him how much I enjoyed the pizza they bought me and we had a fun swim racing back-and-forth and they were in one lane and then I was in the next lane and then because Im small she took my lane and I was swimming in his lane with him and we were racing back-and-forth having a great time. It was a fun time. And I am so so grateful that I have such nice people in my life who really and truly care about me and I know that its not all about me anymore. They were running late and they didnt have my phone number which We corrected today the girl and I exchanged numbers and we were laughing at how could we omit exchanging phone numbers LOL and we just had a great time. The old rose wouldve been where were you, why didnt you show up blah blah blah blah, thank goodness she is going away, the dysfunctional Rose is being taken over by a rose I can actually like yippee!
My sponsor made me (suggested strongly) carry a Q-Tip in my pocket for several years. That might suggest to you all what I spoke to her about in the beginning and apparently for a long while after.
Now, when we speak if I'm 'off on this tangent' again, she'll gently remind me, "It's not all about you, all the time." I so need to be right-sized at moments and she's able to do it with humility and grace.
I am better today at pausing to realize it's really not all about me. Great job Rose allowing things to unfold and just going with your Plan B. I also find that I can switch gears or go to a plan B more easier than before recovery. For me, there's a freedom in being able to just let things 'roll off my back'.
Thanks for the share Rose!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Iamhere...I'm going to do that. Put a qtip in my pocket. Only thing is, here we call them "cotton buds". Sounds so 1950s proper lol. Cotton buds. So I'll call mine" nip it in the bud: qtip". I need tangible reminders of programme tools.
