Thank you for your Christmas Eve service Deb. Today as I was driving home from some last minute shopping ( it's the eve of Christmas eve where I am ) I was admiring to the point of envy the many tipani trees (frangipani), the abundant varieties of colors and sizes. So beautiful. I've been wanting some in my garden forever. And every year I don't plant them is another year they aren't growing. So thats my plan for the season. Get by any non violating means possible some cuttings and stick 'em in the ground. Flowers definitely clear my head. Looking at them, inhaling their fragrance, making ei (lei in Hawaiian). Happy Christmas family.

Good morning MIP! Thank you Debb for your service and the daily. Thank you all for the lovely ESH & shares....there is no doubt this has been the most unpredictable year of my life and I've had some doozies....perhaps it really is the most unpredictable and then again, perhaps I'm just more aware of life and life events at this age/stage - not entirely sure.

Yet, here we are! We each are uniquely perfectly imperfect. I am one who is better able to clear unwanted 'baggage' in my brain by taking action. Others do best by being still and meditating. I don't think it truly matters what works best or what one does vs. another - it's that we care enough about ourselves to seek the courage to actually make that change.

Speaking for myself, prior to recovery, my mind was truly dominated by negative and fear-filled thoughts. I read countless self-help books and tried many different ways to change my thinking, my outlook, etc. It truly never 'stuck' simply because I was not truly willing or humble enough to trust the process of another! I didn't realize this until much later, and I do now also believe that while I had discomfort that drove me seeking change, I had not hit bottom, not felt the 'gift of desperation' or was willing to surrender yet.

Any time I ponder how I am really doing in this pandemic year, no matter what I am feeling when I start, I end up at the same place - the God of my understanding knew that I needed all that I've learned in my life/recovery journey to 'do this'. I agree - it's not my intent to just 'survive' this pandemic; it's to keep growing, thriving, changing, learning, etc. I can't help but consider how easy we truly have it compared to those faced with the 1918 pandemic. My mind normally goes to the technology that allows us, willingly, to keep contact. Last time I processed 'this' in my mind, it dawned on me that many did not have running water, hot water, washing machines, etc. I am continuously grateful I was born for this one vs. that one; I am hopeful I would have survived and adapted but I have my doubts!

I've been rubbing my brisket for tomorrow, picked up my last curb-side grocery order, applied a coat of stain to a table I'm working on, and did my morning run & work-out....I did change things up today and am listening to Christian Christmas music - a lovely, nice change. I am willing to do whatever I can/need to to empty my mind of the baggage of the past that seems to often shade my present and certainly my projection of future events. It just doesn't serve me well at all, and is an unhealthy place for me to camp out.

I wish each and everyone celebrating a very Merry Christmas and hope the next year brings peace to all. Enjoy your Thursday family and choose joy - it helps and matters!