The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
One thing that is a constant beautiful memory for me is Betty's love of the holidays. Betty was an exuberant positive person on a daily basis but the holidays were very special for her. She looked forward to them for months. Needless to say she wad also aware that the holidays were very difficult for some of us.
Betty loved living in New York, psrticularly loved living on the lower east side and relished the energy and diversity of New York. I know that she particularly loved Thanksgiving because of the Macy's Thanksgiving parade. How she looked forward to that parade
Betty of course also loved getting dressed up. Naturally New York is one of the places where getting dressed up is so significant. The streets of New York are full of people who are chic, beautiful and briming with life . And our Betty was equally stunning no matter what day of the week it was.
But few people could compare to our Betty. Her hats, her tastefully applied make up, her carefully coordinated extraordinary outfits and her beautifully cut hair. What a package what an inspiration to keep your head up no matter what life throws at you.
I was lucky enough to.get Christmas gifts from Betty. They were extremely thoughtful and most of a reminder of her exquisite taste.
Whenever I sent Betty a card she would always tell me where she put it in her apartment. How sweet and thoughtful she was. What a consistent message she had of valuing and appreciating others. How significant those small gestures were to me.
Of course Betty also relished and adored her apartment after all who does not want to have an apartment in Manhatten.
In this year which has been so extraordinarily difficult for all of us it is indeed wonderful to remember someone who was so central to this group from day one she discovered it. She came in took over so much responsibility and made it her home. Then she was here to consistently both help and inspire others and she consistently welcomed everyone to this group.
There are few people who have had such an incredible influence on me. Of course there are few people I miss more than Betty. Betty was such a memorable person and so very central to this group. We were so very lucky to have her with us for so long.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving one of Betty's favorite days. Most days were a good day with Betty. However she often struggled with grief that almost swallowed her alive after the untimely death of her son Everyday she showed such grace and patience and tact too and passion for celebrating every mo.ent. What an incredible zeal she had for living and how loving and gracious she was consistently to others. Everyday Betty was a demonstration of someone who absolutely relished her life. Betty rose up like a phoenix from ashes of her inexorable grief and made the most of every moment she was alive.
Most of all every day showed love,tact patience and unconditional regard for others. Tomorrow on Betty's all time special day, I will remember her with love. I will always love Betty not just for the way she helped me in exceptionally desperate times. I will always love her for her dedication and love for this program and her exuberant passion for her recovery. I will always love her because knowing I could come back to this group and pick up where I left off with her warm welcome to guide me was a consistent place of nuturing for me. That was part of the beginnimg of feeling I belonged in this world.
Tomorrow is an extraordinary day in the middle of a pandemic. How extraordinarily blessed I am to have those warm and inspirational memories to help guide me through an extraordinary day one of the most seminal days in this extraordinary and tumultuous year
How very blessed I have been to know someone as special as Betty was.
Maresie
-- Edited by Maresie888 on Wednesday 25th of November 2020 10:05:30 PM
-- Edited by Maresie888 on Wednesday 25th of November 2020 10:13:31 PM
I remember Betty as courageous. Something in her to me said she understood street and survival. Because of that, I respected her, trusted her and cared a lot about what she might think. Not in the program sense of caring what others think but in a cultural sense of having consideration for the opinion of an esteemed elder. She and two other women in my life have had that impact. Never ever forgotten. TFS Maresie.
She was amazing. A true hero. She gave me a wedding present having never met me face to face. I did love that lady. One of the wisest people I ever met (but technically didnt).
Thank you for this great share Maresie. I can't imagine not being touched by the kindness, spirit and person that was Betty. She truly showed me grace in action. Her signature truly summarized so much about her - The highest form of wisdom is Kindness. She was consistently kind, calm, caring and loving to all.
When my sweet Layla passed in March, it helped me greatly to project Betty and a few others I loved and lost were waiting for her and willing to keep her company until we meet again. Betty inspired me to be better & do better always...
Thanks everyone for your shares.
__________________
Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
Maresie, what a beautiful tribute! I remember Betty's strength and kindness on this forum -- always conveying something positive and helpful in a few words. Thank you for sharing this portrait of Betty.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Our thoughts are all unique... therefore, our views of Betty are just as unique. Sharing these wonderful words of love and tribute helps people who didn't know Betty for as long, add to our knowledge of her. I truly felt her spirit when I read your words. Sometimes I go back to old posts just so I can look upon her Avatar... she was that impactful in such a short amount of time.
Enjoy the parade in heaven, Betty!
__________________
"The wolf that thrives, is the one you feed." - Cherokee legend
"Hello, sun in my face. Hello you who made the morning and spread it over the fields... Watch, now, how I start the day in happiness, in kindness." Mary Oliver
And let us not forget Betty always looked anazing and had incresible energy.
Her smile was a full wattage one. Betty glowed with happiness and could still keep it real
I know Betty could somehow flow through this incredible crisis we are all in at this current time. I have to.work today becsuse i simoly cannot wish away my financial issues. I cannot tely on anyone but me to.keep me finsncially solvent
Thank you all for celebrating the life of such a well-lived, kind, and courageous person as our Betty. She taught me to see the better side of me, instead of focusing on the character defects. She got me back on track when I lost my way, and I have one gift she gave me which I have hanging on my wall.
Betty loved the Renaissance Fair in upstate NY. She and Peter attended every year that I knew her, except for one year when they mis-understood the dates. Cant you just picture Betty dressed up in the attire of that time period? She also loved and attended the Metropolitan Opera in NYC, and was an enthusiastic Giants fan.
The lessons she taught me will stay with me forever. Grateful for having had such an amazing sponsor.
Nice to hear about Betty, whom I did meet in person...
...
...