The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Beware of the rubber conscience and the concrete heart. I read this in the pamphlet Alcoholism the Family Disease this morning. Probably have read it a hundred no maybe hundreds of times LOL but today it stuck out.
How many times have I justified actions I am not proud of? thousands
How have I changed that? by becoming honest and standing up for myself instead of hiding things to get my way without dignity
Why does my head harden my heart and hold grudges? to prevent pain
I am going to be open and admit that I don't quite understand what that quote means. Admitttedly I was just gonna read this and move on, but I thought maybe a little honesty would suit me better today.
I don't know Spark, it may mean different things to different people but this morning it made me think of the white lies and controlling actions I have done in regard to my AH. Things like hide money in case of an emergency or say I will be home earlier than I know I will be to make sure he isn't gone too long doing whatever among other things. I guess my rubber conscience is justifying my actions in order to control my life with trickery instead of just stating what I want.
And my heart hardens easily when I feel manipulated or disappointed, having a concrete heart does nothing for me except make me miserable. It is not protecting me perhaps just isolating me instead?
Hi Jennifer, thanks for posting. I love the simple phrases that clarify complex concepts. I had forgotten that particular saying so thanks for the reminder. At the moment I particularly appreciate when people post about our literature (respecting copyright laws of course) as I misplaced most of mine when I moved back home. I've been physically unwell for a while now so my life is somewhat unmanageable and I haven't been able to find it yet. I'm looking forward to unearthing my 'buried treasure' with sweet anticipation. Its like looking forward to opening Christmas presents when you're tiny...you just know something wonderous is inside and can hardly contain you're enthusiasm.
