The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Todays reading is a focus on self-care and what that can mean for us in recovery. The writer states that while he/she did put effort into self care, it still was with other people in mind. Only after some time in recovery was the focus truly shifted to care of self FOR the self.
I am reminded of the times I have responded to grief in my life. There have been times that I have done what I needed to (eating well, getting sleep, exercise) but only in order to move forward through the sadness. Over time those things that I was doing for myself became things I really needed to do for myself. I would add that the same has applied to me with our program. At first I finally went to Alanon because enough people had suggested it; after some time and paying attention, I continued because it is what I have needed to do for me.
Today my self care included some extra sleep which is why this isnt posting until nearly 8am! I hope all of you enjoy some self care this Sunday!
Good Morning Mary I neglected "self care" for most of my adult life until i found alanon and discovered that self care was not selfish and that "toughing it out" was not an asset. focusing on my needs took time and learning how to say hat i needed in situations took practice and patience on my part. So happy that I learned to place principles above personalities and recognize my own needs so I could honor them. Glad that you took the time to sleep in. Thanks for your service
Happy Sunday all - and thanks for the ESH and shares above me! Thank you also Mary for your service and the daily. I too tended to neglect myself for most of my adult life and thought that 'fighting through while being super wife, super mom and super employee/other' was proper adulting. Enter recovery in Al-Anon, and it was suggested that not only should I put my needs first but I should ensure I was kind/good to me...
It felt foreign and I felt selfish yet really felt I needed to practice the suggestions given. My way of living had not worked out well for me, and these people seemed genuinely at peace with joy. I've always enjoyed being active, so taking daily walks was one of the first things I added to my daily routine. I used to build my daily 'to-do' based on errands, others, etc. and now today, my things go on first and then I add based on time/availability.
I do much better when I have routines, so there are certain self-care things I do daily, weekly, monthly, etc. I used to feel guilty if I added a nap to my day and today, I've come to truly enjoy them. I am amazed at how different sleep and proper rest can make in my processing, emotions, etc. I fully embrace putting me first today as I believe when I take good care of me, I have more to give to others!
I got up super early and headed to the golf course, then to my weekly meeting....it was a great way to start the day and I do enjoy rest/relaxation over the weekends while those who work run errands, shop, etc. I too am glad you got some extra rest Mary - I hope the long weekend gives you more chances for that!! Make it a great day all!
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Practice the PAUSE...Pause before judging. Pause before assuming. Pause before accusing. Pause whenever you are about to react harshly and you will avoid doing and saying things you will later regret. ~~~~ Lori Deschene
hey (((Mary))) Thank you for sharing...I am learning how to take better care of me in all things..workouts...taking care of my house, car, ME and part of that is proper rest, eating good (been off the junk food Friday binging for a month now) I guess it is because I have a deeper relationship with me and I want to see the best for me...I used to do stuff always with others in mind...their love, their opinion of me, their approval, oh yea, approval seeker I was....NOW I do it for me...I am fair, honest, ethical in my dealings with others, and when standing to a boundary, I STAND firm to it, with kindness in my heart...but I am also kind to me...taking care of me and my needs whatever they may be, rest, time for myself, eating, stopping to take a break, is becoming a habit.......thank you for your service.......
