The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Original talk with my husband went fairly well, telling him I wanted to seperate. He said no get a divorce and we will sit down and get this over. All was calm, so I left to get a perm and he did talk to boys about still being around for them. He then retreated to garage. Called me a couple of times with mean onliners and hung up on me. Whatever! I came home with wet hair and he asked me how the bar was???? I walked across the street to get hair done! I walked away without aword and he said fine walk away. Ok you guess what he was doing in the garage??
Anyway it will be a couple of weeks of sniping at me at least I am sure, but as long as he leaves my boys alone I can make it!
Thanks all for commenting, listening and prayers!
Josey
-- Edited by jrtjosey at 09:18, 2006-03-14
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Julianne - It's best to move on. You cannot look back in anger in life. It's too short
Please do be very careful Josey. I know when my A felt that I was about to do something that the drinking got a lot worse(yes,sounds impossible-but he always managed it).During this time,he would be plotting,scheming,goading....anything he could do to make me feel like he was the victim and I the perpetrator.He went from accepting that we'd come to the end of the road and I was right to look out for myself,to attempting to show remorse and sorrow for how bad things had got and how he couldn't help himself and couldn't survive without me.This always degenerated into anger and smashing things in the house.(You can live without me,but you will have to live without that now as well!!) When I didn't repond to the damage,he would slash his wrists with broken beer bottles,or knives to get the sympathy vote.When I stopped responding with sympathy to that,the violence was then directed at me. I don't know if your A has ever shown violent tendencies,(I hope not!) but the only thing I can say,is that whenever my A felt that I really had come to the end of my tether-it threatened his security and like a desperate cornered animal,would eventually come out fighting.
You are a strong and very courageous woman.Please just keep in the forefront of your mind that he may well attempt to create a diversion from whatever is actually going on.Stay strong and expect the unexpected.I failed to do that and got the shock of my life.
Take care my friend.My prayers are with you (((((((Josey)))))))
