The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I have not really shared before I am a little shy, I think I have stated in chat I selfishly sit and read and learn so much from those who have the guts, to open up. Having said that I am now going to share, my experience as to what has happened to get me here today.
My A was in rehab for 119 days graduated, was doing fine, at least I thought so, until Christmas, then the bottom fell out. Has relapsed a total of three times since graduating, in a little less than 6 months. Today has checked self in a detox center, and has admitted that needs additional help, that rehab is not the only solution. And when you fulfill a program, doesn't mean to everyone is sme that the disease is gone, some are stronger than others, and many are weaker and need additional help. Anyway my A is 250 miles away, I am proud that the step was taken. Maybe the A taking the step to do this on own, will help. I drove A to rehab center and tearful goodbye, couldn't communicate for 30 days. Had to take a bus or train to get there this time, no cell phone, no communication for seven days, it's hard to do without worring. But I will get through this.
I haven't been a great big American Idol fan, in the past but when I heard "Jesus take the Wheel" the other night it was like "wow" the leader at my face to face always says that "she's in the back of the bus, and letting her HP drive" I have never heard that song before that night. My A and I have called each other after Idol all the time to compare notes, on the performances, and I asked if in any of meetings, group situationsetc. if had ever heard that expression before. /said "no". So I went on to share with A about myAlanon meetings and how many times I had heard it. Then the next day states, checking self into a detox center, so who knows what happened. All I can do is just continue to let Jesus take the wheel.
Thank you all have unknowingly helped me in the past, and I just hope that my post can help someone.
I keep hummiing that song to myself, in fact, I posted all the words to it in a MIP forum.
All we need to do to get started on our journey is to tell HP, God, Jesus, whoever, to take the wheel, take it from my hands....I can't do this on my own.
My husband left me angry and screaming 2 weeks ago this coming Monday. Do not know where he is, what he is doing, what he is thinking. I pray for HP to keep him in his care and hope he can find his way to recovery. I will be here to welcome him home, should he decide to. But I have not called or begged or drove around to find him.
I asked Jesus to take the wheel, take it from my hands............
HP knows what is best for my husband and I, and he will watch over us tonight.
You are not selfish at all We all recover differently. Welcome to MIP.
I too love Jesus Take the Wheel and say it alot. There are so many modern country music songs these days that could be "program" songs: Alabama's Angels Among Us; Phil Vassar's This Is God; MercyMe's I Can Only Imagine etc etc etc.
Keep coming :)
Maria123
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If I am not for me, who will be? If I am only for myself, then who am I? If not now, when?
It is so nice meeting you :) My daughter who is 21 went to treatment inpatient last year for 2 months. She has been to an outpatient program before that too. I started working my program while she worked her program. They have their own higher power/god and we have our own higher power/god. I am glad you found this site so you can work your journey on you while he works his journey on him. I also like American Idol and yes, that song really hits a person's heart. Thanks for the reminder that we are not the ones in charge but need to give it over to our Higher Power/jesus. You are new and just inspired me. Thanks :) cdb
Thanks for your post. I think that one thing that we don't realize is how powerful our stories are in helping others. I shows us that we are not alone and that there is hope. That is how Alanon works.
The day I heard that song by one of my fave Idol stars 'Carrie Underwood' I knew what it was I liked about her. She is not afraid to be real and to be spiritual....she sings that song with such belief and honesty it just comes across the way it was written to be heard. I love it.
Hugs
Aly
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If you keep on doing what you have always done, you will get what you've always gotten !
We all recover differently. Welcome to MIP.