The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
My AH disappeared into his room after we opened up presents this AM. He's been amiable and easy to get along with except for his silence to and from church yesterday and how he disappeared for the first 10 minutes of service....
But, honestly, I can't complain. He is now asleep on his bed with his hands neatly folded on his lap. I could be resentful about the fact that I was up at 7 cooking a holiday breakfast for everyone(he didn't get up until 8:30 at least) and now I'm roasting a turkey for dinner. I could be resentful about the fact that he disappeared on us and that it does't feel like a family atmosphere for Christmas, etc. I could be resentful because I know that I did ALL of the holiday decor, tree stuff, shopping, cooking, cleaning, etc all by myself.
Yet, this program has helped me put things in perspective and now I can say these things: Maybe AH is depressed because he knows this will be our last as a family? Maybe he's tired because he was snoring badly last night and it disrupted his sleep? Maybe he just needs time to himself and I don't need to take it personally anymore?
And, all those things that I, myself, did??? Well, I chose to do those things. They were my choices and I did them because I wanted to, because I wanted to serve my family, because I wanted to make the best of things, and because I wanted my tree done and trimmed.
I can say these things and I can accept things as they are and that is all because of this wonderful program. Hope everyone is gearing up for a beautiful new year!
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Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be!
Hi Andromeda. Merry Christmas to you. Your day sounds so much like mine and yes, yoh are right, each of us chose to make the house Christmasey, chose to make the nice breakfast for everyone, chose to make the special turkey dinner.
But you know what I also chose to do? Right after dinner, I stood up, threw my napkin away, left all my dishes at my place and walked into my bedroom where I am now lying down and resting. And guess what, they all just started cleaning up the kitchen and put away the food!
