Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Post Info TOPIC: Returning to a classroom


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:
Returning to a classroom


More than a year ago, I posted a thread on a horrible experience I had had with an oral surgeon and the need to return to my dentist for more painful work on a molar the surgeon had broken while I was under and discovered later at home when the Novocain and sedatives wore off and I removed the gauze from my mouth.  The surgeon lied more than once after I called him about the broken molar - a belief that was supported by my dentist who didn't say anything against the surgeon but did share what was true about the broken molar with me. 

Fast forward to this past weekend.  Somehow, I broke a back molar. I don't know when.  I don't know how.  I discovered it because my cheek became increasingly sore and I discovered the broken back molar while exploring the source for such a painful area in my mouth.  I returned to my dentist yesterday for what I knew would be yet another painful experience although this time there was no surgery and stitches to work around or an anxious person to deal with who had been damaged and then lied to by both a since retired dentist and then the resultant oral surgeon who damaged my mouth further in an effort to repair the damage of the then retired dentist.  I didn't know last year who to trust anymore of these "experts" in their field.  I just knew that I had to have more work done at my personal and pocketbook expense.

This time, I knew I could trust the dentist I now have.  This time, though the experience of repair was still painful (I don't numb well with Novocain and the injection site is into the bone) and uncomfortable for reasons I don't want to go into.  I didn't get sick.  I wasn't so anxiety ridden I couldn't sit in the chair.  And this poor man who repaired the damage that both a dentist and an oral surgeon did to my mouth didn't have to deal with a distrustful, sore and sick patient. 

The lesson for me in this experience is that even though there are some people who lie and do damage that they won't admit to - there are other people who are secure in themselves, honest, patient and able to be trusted.  If I don't like my experience with another person and know that I have not contributed to their bad behavior, I am wasting time and energy trying to understand them and simply need to seek out people who are more to my liking and prove themselves to be trustworthy.  Otherwise, I keep myself stuck in relationships that are damaging to me.  That choice is mine and the consequences I suffer are mine, too.  I can choose to enter into a relationship.  I can choose to leave it, too. 

 

 



-- Edited by grateful2be on Thursday 16th of October 2014 09:56:59 AM

__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 971
Date:

You bless me every day, Catherine, with your wisdom and caring. Every thread you start, every post.

I hope you heal very fast.

You are a blessing.

Temple

__________________

It's easy to be graceful until someone steals your cornbread.  --Gray Charles

 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

aww  You realize that you bless me, too, Temple?  You help heal some of those still wounded but not so much now places in me.  Keep being the loving, healing, honest and witty woman that you are, sister.



__________________

"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 609
Date:

thank you for this share! The last paragraph is so true! I think it can be easy to get stuck in a denitst/patient or doctor/patient situation because we just think we have to keep going back and we don't! We can choose to find someone we are more comfortable with. Personal relationships this is still true just a little trickier...

I had a tooth with what the dentist originally thought was a cavity. When he got into the tooth he discovered it needed a root canal. When he did the root canal something went wrong. I had to go to an oral surgeon, the oral surgeon had to do the procedure twice. I was not comfortable with the dentist who had originally done the root canal. I just felt like I couldn't really trust him further.

I talked to a trusted coworker and she spoke highly of her dentist and I have been there ever since. Going to the dentist is still not my favorite thing but I know I can trust my dentist!



__________________
PP


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3964
Date:

So true, Catherine. Sometimes I hang on like a barnacle, though, then watch as God does the pryingsmile



__________________

Paula



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3281
Date:

(((((((((((((((((((((((((C))))))))))))))))))))))))  OMG, what an awful experience and yep, you can enter and you can leave a relationship..............sooo sorry that other dr. messed up your mouth, but you found someone who could fix it..........I am really wary of doctors...it took me a long time to find my MD  and now i have to go dentist hunting b/c old dentist is not on my insurance......hate having to search again, but can't afford to stay w/him b/c $$...what else, lol.......bless your heart  xo



__________________

Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!! 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3281
Date:

PP wrote:

So true, Catherine. Sometimes I hang on like a barnacle, though, then watch as God does the pryingsmile


 LOLOL.....OMG......ME too, LOL.......not as bad now but i still gotta watch it re: bad jobs and that is out of financial need........Paula this is sooo funny



__________________

Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!! 



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 2200
Date:

Catherine, your last paragraph is gold dust - thank you for sharing your lesson.
I hope your jaw recovers quickly.

__________________
PP


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3964
Date:

Sending you some healing energy, Catherine.  Thank you for sharing this in spite of your pain.......generosity is second nature to you.



__________________

Paula



~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3972
Date:

Wow this is how I feel about my new boyfriend, he is patient and helps to heal me from men in my past. He didn't cause the damage, but is willing to help me through it anyway. I have surrounded myself with some really great people in my life that help grow me from my past. I am so glad you are here! Sending you love and support!

__________________

Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."

Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.