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Post Info TOPIC: Need help finding a Sponsor


Veteran Member

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Posts: 26
Date:
Need help finding a Sponsor


I've been going to 3-4 different Alanon meetings each week for the last 4 months.  I've made numerous attempts to find a sponsor.  I've spent time getting familiar with other members learning who's been there long enough to even sponsor.  If those few Ive tried i either have been encourage to find a sponsor just not them, theyre so busy they don't call back or this last attempt (meaning Ive run out of people to ask) I mentioned before the meeting I was interested in finding a Sponsor, then  after the meeting my several attempts to be part of the conversation were ignored until I gave up said good night they both immediately responded goodnight.  I've given this to my higher power, I'm trying to accept that maybe I'm not suppose to have a sponsor an have to figure out things on my own.  I'm really hurt regarding last night so much that I don't even want to go back, (I realize that only hurts me but if I don't feel supporte?) I feel  kind of like it was hard enough to reach out ask for help only to be rejected.  I'm struggling any input, Newpaths (don't feel to much like new paths right now)



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~*Service Worker*~

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Posts: 7576
Date:

I'm sorry that your search for a sponsor hasn't resulted in the desired outcome. I wasn't really ready for a sponsor for awhile, but I did keep attending meetings, listening, making friends with some in the fellowship, reading my readers and doing other things that were helpful for me outside Al-Anon. Perhaps what you say is true? "...maybe I'm not supposed to have a sponsor"(yet). Figuring things out on your own - well, that I do find myself wondering about. An ancient saying "When the student is ready, the teacher appears." comes to my mind. Maybe you, like me, aren't ready for the sponsor that your HP is going to introduce to you at the perfect time? There are times that folks have wanted me to sponsor them and because of my own issues at the time to include previous commitments or the need to take more time for me than what is usual, I have turned them down. There are also other occasions when I know that I'm simply not a good match for that person and I decline in order for them to have a better chance to meet the person who is right for them. If you are experiencing the meetings to be helpful then not attending would be hurtful to you? If people aren't responding to your request for a sponsor right now, then it does make sense to me for you to stop asking for a bit without giving up on that desire for a sponsor for you.  I'm glad to see that you've turned this all into your HP's hands and aren't choosing to force solutions.



-- Edited by grateful2be on Tuesday 23rd of September 2014 11:07:37 AM



-- Edited by grateful2be on Tuesday 23rd of September 2014 11:08:34 AM

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 26
Date:

Grateful2be

What a wonderful reply, " when the student is ready the teacher will appear. " made 

me feel better.  I'm still shocked an angry I  how I was treated by senior fellow alanon members, 

it was very inappropiate.  I think I would feel better an show respect to myself by finding another

group.  I so love the ancient saying " when the student is ready a teacher will appear"  it doesn't 

excuse the inappropriate behaviors but offers a huge soothing comfort.  Thank you so very much



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~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

(((NP)))

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig



Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 26
Date:

Mmmmm, well if I'm interpreting that correctly.  That would be the room where I go to contemplate, think spend tine with my HP because I often find comfort, peace serenity there

 



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~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 7576
Date:

That's a wonderful room to visit, NP! I love that response.  The question is actually meant as my signature to go with the avatar.  I am happy you saw it and an answer to it came to you.  smile



-- Edited by grateful2be on Tuesday 23rd of September 2014 08:41:49 PM

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig

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