Update- rock bottom? - Al-Anon Family Group

CarlyM123 · Member

Update- rock bottom?

grateful2be · ~*Service Worker*~

We hit rock bottom sometimes, too, Carly. We go to Al-Anon for ourselves because we need help and support for our own recovery from the affects of alcoholism. It is a lifelong journey for us whether or not we are involved with a person with this disease. If we don't take the medicine we need (Al-Anon), even if our relationship to the current person ends, we will choose another person who might make our lives even harder and more chaotic. You've been drug down a road hanging onto your stolen car. If this wasn't your partner but a person in rehab what would you say to them if they called you from jail - collect. It's usually always collect and costs a lot to accept it. You can't help her and you can help you. I hope you do continue to go to Al-Anon for you. You are so worth the comfort, healing and support that is there for you. I also find myself wondering what message it would send her if you easily accepted her calls from jail after stealing your car?

-- Edited by grateful2be on Monday 4th of August 2014 09:28:12 PM

CarlyM123 · Member

Yeah you are right... I guess if she calls collect I can ignore it.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Carly I am so sorry that you were hurt both physically and emotionally This sounds like a dreadful experience and I do hope you have seen a Dr. and are receiving appropriate medical care.

I can understand how you feel and how this could happen, Living with the disease of alcoholism causes the entire family to react in a negative destructive fashion. We do so need a program of recovery in order to regain our ability to live with courage, serenity wisdom and sanity.

Please search out alanon face to face meetings and attend If that is not possible , come to our on line meetings here and connect.

There is hope

Jen61 · ~*Service Worker*~

Don't beat yourself up. We all want to believe. Not just once, twice or three times. The believing goes on and on and then finally we see the light. I feel you are lucky you were not hurt worse or even killed. Take care of you. That is the most important part of Al-Anon.

Newlife girl · ~*Service Worker*~

Carly your story sounds like something out of a movie! So sad! You deserve better. Stealing your car? Road rash? I hope you take care of yourself. Al anon will help you. Have faith.

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

I know it is hard hon, but we cannot rescue them They will not learn anything if we take away their chance to know how it feels to blow it. We all need consequences to learn.

She needs to feel awful. I know, we want to help, but al anon teaches us to stay on our own side of the street.

so if you can find a friend, or make yourself comfy and ok please take care of you!

el-cee · ~*Service Worker*~

Carly, glad you reached out. It does sound like you have surrendered some of your own solutions that have got you nowhere up to this point. In alanon and aa there is a lot of information on that feeling of surrender, giving up. Its often the best place to be in terms of recovery. For me, I was just like you when I found my seat in my alanon meeting. Ive never looked back and have almost 100 percent attendance.
Alcoholism affects everyone involved, we develop symptoms, usually distorted thinking and we need to undo the mess that has become our minds. I also went to counselling, 1 session, the counsellor told me I was well on my way and alanon was all I needed. It sounds like your mind is wide open, crisises often have that effect, go to a meeting, you will feel like your home.x

milkwood · ~*Service Worker*~

Please be gentle and kind with yourself Carly - as Jen61 said, we have all believed over and over again. Its only natural to want to believe in our loved ones if we can. Now is a good time to believe and invest in yourself.

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.