I have been a stay at home mom since our first child was born 10 years ago.  Prior to that I had a good job that I enjoyed.  It was a big adjustment, staying home, but one that I have come to enjoy.  I have treasured the time I am able to spend with my kids.  I have also become very involved with a local charity, the kids' school and church.  I am very lucky to be in the position I am in.

Unfortunately, alcoholism is progressive and has rocked this happy boat.  For some time, I would lie awake at night worrying WHEN (not if) he would loose his job.  The years passed, but that day didn't come.  I started to foolishly believe that he appeared functional to those at work.  But how could they not know??!?  Well with the progression, he got much worse.  We separated last April when I could not take anymore.  It was really scary for me to kick him out because I was financially dependent upon him.  I thought he would just file for divorce and move on.  But he didn't.  He sobered up (or so I thought), got into counseling and said all the right things.  I was early in my Alanon work.  He moved back home in September.  

We then went right back into his pattern: 1st month ok; 2nd month rocky and 3rd month right back to where we started and getting worse.  I knew he needed to go but waited out the holidays.  Again, how was he holding a job?  I asked him to leave in January because things were dire.  Even my kids asked for him to go!  In March, the dreaded day finally came.  He was fired.  His coworker confirmed with me that it was because of the drinking.  He was given notice months before but didn't tell me until 2 weeks before his last day.  He was confident that he would get a new job and never have to tell me that he was fired.  The whole situation hit me very hard.  Thank goodness I was actively going to meetings or I might have lost it.  He has always been lucky and landed a new, higher paying job within a month.  But with that experience, I changed greatly.  

I knew that as soon as I got myself and the kids to a healthier place (emotionally), I would need to get a job.  So we have been moving along.  I turned the whole situation over to my HP because it was all so overwhelming otherwise.  How will I manage with the kids?  (AH only sees them about 3 hrs/month-by his choosing).  What type of job do I want?  And many more questions.  

I decided to take this situation as a gift.  I have the opportunity to start fresh and new.  I started to get excited about working again.  I still have worries about my kids, but I have to trust in my HP to steer me in the right direction.  And I am happy to report that my HP has done amazing things for me and I am truly grateful!  My former employer contacted me- out of the blue and had a job that was a perfect fit for me.  I went in for an interview.  I met with 3 people and a week later, I was offered the position!  I have had a few other interviews but I can honestly say that there is a divine intervention here because everything just feels right and they are willing to wait for me to start in September, once my kids go back to school.  

I have been battling some fearful emotions but am trying to stay focused on the positive.  This job comes with a great salary and benefits.  I will no longer be dependent on my AH's paycheck.  This gives me great peace.  No more worry.  There are some great people I will be working with and there is a lot of opportunity for growth.  This is the next step in moving on and it is a HUGE one for me.  I am grateful for Alanon and MIP.  I couldn't have done this without all of you on this site.  Thank you.