The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Hello all.. I have not been on here for a while.. I have been a bit lost.. I have been attending cross roads and celebrating recovery. I go to church reach out to many people. I am tired of being tired. And I believe my A son just caught his second wind. I know I can not do nothing no more. It's all up to him!! I pray he gets back into recovery. But I'm done feeling like there is more I can do... Any words will help.
(((((Gaby)))))...often times I have heard the statement about being "sick and tired of being sick and tired" and at one time I related myself. Everything sucked for me including my attitude about getting on with my own recovery. When I became willing and made the commitment to all of the suggestions the wonderful "work on me" started and I came face to face with my Higher Power as the fellowship. I remember my early sponsor making a commitment to support me and guide me with several caveats...one was that I "work" at it (recovery), another was that I never bring up the name of my alcoholic/addict or the pronouns, Her, She, or They as excuses for what was wrong with "'me". He held me to and then taught me to keep myself responsible for and to my peace of mind and serenity or the lack of it. I know this program works when I work it. Keep coming back (((((Hugs)))))
Keep at it Gaby, your HP loves you and you deserve a good life and you can choose it. Let your son make his choices, he has free will just like we all do. Sending love to you, its not easy but just let it go, HP will work in His time. We have no control and shouldnt anyway, our kids are not extensions of our will, but their own people with free will and have to do it their way. In support.
((Gaby)) Keep on keeping one foot in front of the other, one day at a time. Let the things you cannot change go, keep focusing on yourself, and travel your path more lightly.
His business is up to him, and you have yourself to be working on in the meantime. ((Gaby)) One day at a time. Nice to hear from you, keep at it, you just need to keep doing that next right thing.
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Nothing has changed but my attitude, everything has changed.
You might have hit your bottom so now it's time for your recovery. When your son is sick and tired of being sick and tired he too by the grace of God will seek help.
Lets pray his HP will give him the courage and strength to overcome.
(((( hugs ))))
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
There was a time in my recovery that I was afraid to feel good - in some skewed way seeing that as a betrayal of my loved ones' troubles. I kept looking to them to see how I should feel during the day. My codependency told me that unless my loved ones got better, I shouldn't feel good about me or my life. Fortunately, my HP had a different idea than my disease did at that time. Sent me the strong suggestion and the energy to go with it to do things for me that I loved doing - not once a month or a year - but every day. Since I had surrendered to my own powerlessness and the facts at hand - my life and I were both a mess - and turned myself into God's hands, I guess God took me at my word and shoved me out of the misery seat onto a path that was life-giving for me. I took a car care course, got involved in volunteer work I wanted to do because I wanted to do it, went out with new found friends, started taking daily walks with a friend early in the morning. If I didn't like something or the people I met, I just found something else to do and met friends right for me at that time. Little by little I let the old life die because I had filled my life up with reasons to get up every morning and enjoy myself and my life. Guilt and depression were no longer able to take up residence in my mind and heart to the degree they once had. Self criticism was replaced by a return of self-esteem because I heard the still small voice that asked me the question, "If you could do anything you wanted, what would you do?" Oh, the things I wanted to do that I had buried! No wonder I was depressed and guilt ridden. Once I heard the question, answered it honestly and was willing to do some of what I wanted to do if I could do whatever I wanted (turned out I could do all of it), and did it - negative thoughts and feelings lost their power to control me.
