Ugly stuff. - Al-Anon Family Group

Melly1248 · ~*Service Worker*~

Ugly stuff.

Melly1248 · ~*Service Worker*~

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SerenityRUS · ~*Service Worker*~

Melly Hugs .. sending you love, prayers and support .. please take care of you and your girl. Can he be removed by the authorities police? Hugs s

KennyFenderjazz · ~*Service Worker*~

Melly, you know what you are doing. You are thinking it through. Take a step back and make a plan. We've all seen you grow and blossom into a courageous woman with a very effective toolbox.

I agree, your pets are important. I couldn't leave behind Bowie either, I can tell he has a wonderful spirit. So take a few moments, pray serenity or whatever you feel best to HP, and then do whatever He reveals to you.

I don't know what the laws are like there, but here if he starts domestic violence, then he is the one that gets taken away. Keep your phone nearby to be able to call the authorities.

Sending you lots of support
Kenny

ryanhearted · Senior Member

Hugs and prayers. I agree, contacting the authorities may be a step in the right direction. Keep yourself safe in the process.

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Prayers, Melly. Is there a hotline you can call for person to person guidance? Can you take your pets to someone until you can retrieve them? I understand your concern for them.

hotrod · ~*Service Worker*~

Dear Melly,

I am so very sorry that you and your daughter have suffered such pain and upset. I understand your concern about your pets and know when I left, I took a cat in a carrier but needed to leave a hamster with a friend. Is it possible to bring your animals to an animal shelter for a time until you can regroup? A Women's shelter's hotline number would also be great for you and your daughter.

Please keep connected and share as you progress through this difficult time.

Many prayers sent across the miles.

milkwood · ~*Service Worker*~

Melly, (((((hugs)))))).
It is not ok to be scared by someone's behaviour!!!!
Is there an RSPA hotline that you can call to see if the have a short term fostering service for animals? I so love seeing you blossom on these pages, and I love that smiling happy picture on your profile and I think that it might take a lot to scare you. Prayers for you, your daughter and your four legged friends.

Sweet Stanley · ~*Service Worker*~

(((Melly))) So sorry to here this! I am sending you prayers and hope. Stay strong in your program, your faith, and yourself. Please be careful and Stay Safe!!!!

mm830 · Senior Member

Melly, I will say lots of prayers for you. If there is a domestic crisis center or something like that to reach out to they should be a good resource. I would also call the police if he hurt your daughter this should be reported. I am so sorry.

el-cee · ~*Service Worker*~

Call the police and get him removed, there are laws that can protect you and your girl, its scary to take the action, I know and fear makes us look for all sorts of obstacles to stop us doing the right thing. Look for the resources that are available to you, your higher power is telling you something here and will keep telling you until you listen, in my experience.x

-- Edited by el-cee on Monday 17th of February 2014 12:13:06 PM

Cathyinaz · ~*Service Worker*~

Yes call the police. Doesn't matter who's on the lease he can't hurt you no matter what or what country your in. He should go not you!!!

You will be in my prayers but please take action no matter how scary. What you have gone though is scary enough and it should NOT happen.

PP · ~*Service Worker*~

Don't wait until he takes a life......and stay in touch so we know it hasn't been yours.

-- Edited by PP on Monday 17th of February 2014 01:30:59 PM

Jill · ~*Service Worker*~

You are not alone. Our prayers are for your safety and those you love.

Jen61 · ~*Service Worker*~

Please call the police. Get him and his stuff thrown out there. Get your locks changed. You, your daughter, dog and cat do not deserve him. How about calling your parents? I so worry about you.

Raven Juniper · Senior Member

/\ /\ /\ Yes, what they all said...
Please get you and your little family safe.
We love you!

SpiderArcana · Senior Member

Oh Melly...please be safe. I'll light a candle for you when I get home.

MorningGlory · Veteran Member

(((Melly))) Things do need to change and you know that they do.
It is the disease, it senses that you are getting well and it wants you back the way you were.
Your daughter is your weakness to him, he plays a lot of on-line games, he knows the strategies,
he has you for the moment. Don't let him win this game he is playing with you. You deserve so much more!

((Melly and Daughter)) spoken only with love!!

Debilyn · ~*Service Worker*~

dearest, do you have an animal group or shelter or? do you have craigslist there? If you have a craigslist you can advertise for temp foster.

do you have friends who could take them? call a vets and ask if they have any ideas, do you have a domestic abuse hotline there? social services? they may be able to help you problem solve.

Iam so sad for you guys.I wish you were here so I could say come onover!!! be careful!!! love,debilyn

Mattie · ~*Service Worker*~

Our local animal shelter does have a resource where they take in pets for people fleeing domestic violence. I wonder if the domestic-violence shelters in your area would know of such a place.

I am so glad you are protecting your daughter. Your A does not sound safe to be around. I am so glad you are protective of your pets, but now I hope you can be protective of yourself too. If he should do the worst to you, they will have no place to go. (Of course that's not the main reason we want you to be safe, we want you to be safe because you deserve to be safe, but I'm just saying.)

You are strong and I know there will be a way to keep you all safe and you will find it. Hang in there. We're here cheering you on.

Melly1248 · ~*Service Worker*~

Thanks all. Just wanted to check in and say im ok, tired and sad but alive and well. Thanks so much for prayers and well wishes. Ill update further when my head is a bit clearer.
Hugs all Id be lost without you.

MorningGlory · Veteran Member

(((Melly))) Stopped in this am and it was great to see you checked in and that you are "ok".
Nothing ever seems simple or clear when I am tired, hope you can get some rest today in safety.

-- Edited by MorningGlory on Tuesday 18th of February 2014 08:20:44 AM

pinkchip · ~*Service Worker*~

I am praying for you Melly. You deserve a safe and nurturing place to raise your daughter.

Tasha · Senior Member

A crisis center - hotline ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Melly))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Police - Anyone

I reached out to everything and everyone when my boyfriend started losing it - in the end - after I left - I would still go back and check on him. He was so far gone at this point... I could hardly stand to look at him, but I was soooooooooo coda. One day I decided I just couldn't go. Turns out - according to the police he had it set up to kill me. Cut his phone cords, locked all doors but the front one among other creepy things.

Well it was the day that he decided to kill us both - I didn't show up by some strange miracle that I'll never be able to explain. He killed himself instead. When I finally gave into my coda and did go and check on him the next day - I was horrified to be the one to find the body.

I never in a million years dreamed that the worst things ever could happen to us. It all happened so slowly - I forever lowered my bottoms along with him until we I even realize we were into the worst of it.

I suffered PTSD and many years to follow because of that. I guess I'm trying to show you my scars to save you from some. I know the choice is yours and I love you no matter what you decide. I too had to leave a cat behind when I left. They took him to a shelter - and held him. I was able to go back for him. I had him another 11 yrs! He just passed in 2012 and it was devastating all over again. That kitty let a lot of tears drip onto him and purred me through many crazy times of things I thought could never happen to me.

Cathyinaz · ~*Service Worker*~

So glad you checked in....please continue. We will be right behind you as much as possible.

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.