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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> My mom ..
Post Info TOPIC: My mom ..
SerenityRUS


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My mom ..
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It must be a full moon (oh it is :)).. I am also asking for prayers for my mom.

She has surgery today, .. while the kids and I were out there 2012 my mom did something to her neck and back.  I should say she further damaged her neck and back (of course .. LOL .. it's MY fault she got on that rollercoaster, never mind the damage she's done over the years.  Falls, car accidents, boating incidents, other crazy rides at amusement parks and family hereditary all have played a part).  When this was pointed out she said oh I forgot about that .. LOL!  So typical mom .. at least now I can tease and laugh about those things.  I'm sure she's glad she can't throw a shoe at me .. LOL!   

I don't know the name of the damage my understanding is that she's got compressed discs in her neck and they can't even give her cortisone shots because there is no room in her neck this pressure is causing her arms pain.  It reminds of neuropathy that people get in their feet, that happened to my grandma and it was from compressed discs in her back .. by the time they did surgery on her the damage had become permanent.  My mom being my mom about talked herself out of the surgery and then had a jolt of pain that reminded her no this didn't just magically go away.  I'm not into unnecessary surgery after her and I talked even she had to agree this needs to happen. 

I feel resentment that I can't be out there with her during this time because I don't have even an ex partner who can be trusted to take care of the kids.  He has proven himself over and over by his behavior he's not capable at this time.  Thankfully she has a friend who is there with her now .. so I feel better about that fact.  She won't be able to stay the full recovery time.  It's had my mom very upset and crying when I've been on the phone with her. 

Anyway, I'm agitated by the fact I can't be where I need to be and the fact she's having surgery anyway is a little discomforting to say the least.  While we have a conflict habituated relationship I don't like that she's scared, there is no living family that can be involved .. that part is hard being an only child. 

thanks in advance, S :)  

 



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Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism.  If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown

"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
grateful2be


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(((S))) You are there with her - just in a way differently than you'd like. I understand the angst. I felt that way when my Mom was dying of cancer and later when my Dad had his stroke. This is what I know now. If it is meant for me to be physically in someone's presence, I will be there. If not - my HP has hemmed me in - and I can trust that. Many, many prayers for calm and healing for your Mom and for you, too. It must make your Mom happy to know she has a daughter who loves her and is concerned for her and will be there with her in a long distance sort of way until that changes. Blessings to you and to your Mom, Serenity.

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig
PP


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Oh, I understand your feelingscry  Prayers for you all.



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Paula
hotrod


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Many Prayers Serenity

Remember we are never alone--  HP is with your Mom and will give her  the  courage she needs to face today.

Please be gentle with yourself



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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

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Cathyinaz


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Prayer for your mom Serenity that she will come though this with flying colors.

Your with her in mind and body and she I'm sure knows this. She is not alone.

((( hugs )))


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Green Eyes


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Prayers promised! Let me know if there is anything I can do from here. (((Serenity)))

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SerenityRUS


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Thank you GE ..

I will I think she's got everything in order. There is a health care person coming in and she has her church as well .. although she tickles me with that too. Our last conversation was really good and she really made me laugh vise versa ..

this was the conversation .. ok .. B, will call you when I'm out .. (me) ok .. so I'm first on the list RIGHT?! Mom, don't put me down as the 9th person to be notified. Mom, I'm serious. (Mom) Well you aren't the 9th .. you are the 4th .. I'm putting a star by your name so you will get called first. (in the back ground) .. S .. I PROMISE YOU WILL GET CALLED FIRST (this is her friend) .. LOL .. and so goes the conversation .. this is just how she is though .. oy.

I wonder why I'm as warped as I am .. LOL.

Hugs, S :)

__________________

Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism.  If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown

"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
neshema2


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Hey S...sending you comfort energy at this time and it looks to me, reading your post that you are doing the best you can with the tools in front of you and that you really ARE there for her, in just a different way

Sometimes we just do what we gotta do and hope for the  best.....sounds painful...sorry to hear she is in such pain.



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Live and let live and do it with peace and goodwill to all!!!! 
yanksfan51


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((((((Serenity))))))

prayers for you and family, Serenity

YF



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Breakingfree


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Sending you and your Mom prayers, love and support!

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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Jerry F


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Many Serenity Prayers Serenity (just had to) I'm empathetic and kept hearing the 1st step over and over as I read your post.  Got you and Mom covered till we hear from you again.  ((((hugs))))  smile



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Debilyn


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You are a very loving daughter. You keeping in touch with your mom is everything to her. Love doesn't have to be touching. In fact it can be shared thru anyt amount of miles.

I do understand your feelings, it is sad you cannot be there. I am glad that you are giving what you can!

prayers always! Debilyn



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

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wornoutmrsfixit


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Could it be stenosis? My dad had surgery for that about a year ago. It was life changing for him. Hope things went well for you and your mom too.

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"Just being there for someone can sometimes bring hope when all seems hopeless." - Dave G. Llewellyn
grateful2be


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Updates on your Mom, S?

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig
mm830


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Your mom knows you are with her even though you aren't physically there your obvious love and care for her absolutely shows. Lots of prayers and healing energy to your mom.

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SerenityRUS


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RE: My mom .. update
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I'm hoping this works .. I've never changed the subject line like this .. surgery was successful. 4-5 hours .. she hadn't come around when her friend called and I was the first call lol. Anyway, she will recover for 3 days at the hospital. Then 2 weeks of down time I don't know anything else at this point. I don't know if I will get to talk to her today .. I'm sure her friend will call shortly. Thank you for the prayers! Hugs s :)

__________________

Faith minus vulnerability and mystery equals extremism.  If you've got all the answers, then don't call what you do "faith". - Brene Brown

"Whatever truth you own doesn't own you" - Gary John Bishop
grateful2be


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RE: My mom ..
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Thanks for the update. Lots of continued prayers for a speedy recovery for her and peace for you.

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"Darkness is full of possibility." Leunig
PP


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Thank you for the update...continued prayers.



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Paula
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