Just for today I will be grateful that I have my beautiful daughters. They are healthy happy and well cared for. I will try not to project outcomes I have no control over. Just for today I will cherish the good memories that have been made. I will practice using my program tools so that when a challenging moment arises I will have the ability to not react. I will remember that there are many streams of support around me. They are caring and kind and they are human. We have all experiences to share and the right to take what we need leaving the rest.
My experience most recently with active A and my daughters. One night after they had gone to bed he showed up with someone he had just met staying at the neighbors. He wanted him to meet the girls. Then he wouldn't accept they had gone to bed and grabbed a flashlight to show them to his new friend anyway.(Poor judgement call. The disease)
Two days later we are all outside with A building a snowman, making snow angels and tossing snowballs laughing and having a wonderful time (Beautiful memory to cherish and keep and hold onto tight to remind me there is a human being who suffers from a disease)
In order for me to keep my sanity I have choices to make. They are my choices. I can not continue to live with the active disease. The poor judgement calls, the lies, the manipulations are all too much for me to manage nor are they my problems when I remove myself from being in the end result of a poor choice A has made.

Sending you all lots of love and support on your journey.
M