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My ABf's parents just called me and asked me to appear in court tomorrow to "testify" to the facts of their son's drinking since I'm the one who is closest to him. They want to committ him as he has been going through detoxes on the average of every 6 weeks for the past 18 mos and need supportive testimony. This is a tough decision...what should I do? I'm sure he is going see me as a traitor. Thanks for your help.
You need to pray to your HP and ask for the advice on the best way to go. When you make that decision it won't be from somebody else telling you what to do and you will feel better about it.
Let go let God help
(((( hugs ))))
__________________
Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
I understand your concern. Having someone committed is not an easy task Be mindful that if he is going through detoxs in the hospital every few months they should have records to prove his admissions . Testifying to his alcoholism is not being a traitor, it is telling the truth so a a very sick person may be able to obtain the help they need.
I would examine my motives, pray about it and listen to my own inner voice.
Lots of prayers for you and support, too. I have a brother who is an alcoholic with mental health problems, too. Before we knew he had developed schizophrenia (he was about 40), he suddenly disappeared in his car. His wife, children and the rest of us didn't know where he was for 3 weeks. He was found starving to death in his car in a parking lot thousands of miles away from his home - a loaded gun (something he never had prior to this) in his front seat. He had to be committed. His disease sure didn't like it. He was hospitalized for about a month, getting the care that he needed. Although he's given up drinking due to cirrhosis, he still struggles with mental health issues and needs to be rehospitalized every so often. Thank God for intervention and hospitals who can help somebody out of their mind for the time being. I can tell you he didn't trust any of us after he was committed - most especially his wife - but, once stabilized - doesn't hold a grudge.
I can't guarantee you how the boyfriend will take to all this at first, but if his parents are stepping up to the plate to have him committed, they are also taking a risk in relationship to him that is less important to them than trying to help save his life. So...not only will I put you and your bf in my prayers, his parents will be in them, too.
Please keep in touch with us as you face this very unpleasant time in your boyfriend's life and that of his parents.
Thanks, everyone for your much appreciated support and input. I prayed for direction and my inner voice told me to go to the courthouse and meet with his parents and brother. We went through the process, interviews with forensic psychiatrist and defense atty. In the end, he was committed to Men's Alcohol Treatment Center for a period of up to 90 days. It was my input that they needed...the recent information from someone close to him who knew how much he had been drinking and how often he drove drunk. (He told the court-appointed atty that he has been sober for 2 years!). Seeing him walk in the courtroom unshaven, in handcuffs and looking like death made me realize he is a very sick person and needs whatever help he can get. This is his 13th detox in 21 mos. Praying for him to want sobriety more than life itself.
Grateful2be...thanks for sharing a bit about your brother...prayers for his continued recovery and mental health.
You have made a very wise and loving although difficult choice. The trouble with alcoholism with or without a serious mental illness like schizophrenia is that we simply don't know what our loved one can or will do without treatment. I am so glad you reached out to the people at this board and checked in with your own HP. There are no certain guarantees with this committal - he may still choose to refuse help, but without it - there is a sure-fire guarantee that the disease will continue to progress. Much comfort and understanding to you and to his family. Prayers for blessings for all of you.
