The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
That truly is" working it". So happy that you connected with a program friend and that by sharing your ESH you were able to enjoy your weekend. You also found the wisdom of taking care of yourself- When we are not focused on the" A" they have no reason to react and get even and drink-- Powerful awareness
Thanks for starting my day with a smile and please keep on taking care of you
-- Edited by hotrod on Monday 3rd of June 2013 09:35:27 AM
This weekend at my Saturday meeting (my favorite meeting ever) This woman gave me her phone number and said "Please call me! I want to talk you." So when I came home I did my motherly running around and finaly had a moment to sit in the quiet and call her. We discussed many things and she asked me "What did you do for yourself today?" I came up empty. She then started saying, "let's forget about your AH for a second and figure out what you can do for yourself to make life a little easier" WHAT? Well, I don't have time to think that between all the laundry and dishes and cleaning I get tired and can't move an inch. Then the lightbulb! My boys are old enough (15 and 12) to do their own laundry and fully capable of putting a dish in the diswasher. So I taught the kids how to do laundry and rinse off the dishes and put in the dishwasher. I had 1/2 the laundry I normally do and no plates and cups piled high in the sink! I went to the store and bought some new nail polish and a face mask. All weekend I focused on me and not everything else around me, especially all the overwhelming and crazy stuff that normally happens and I was actually happy regardless of what was going on. Who knew? I especially like the fact that I learned when you not focusing on an A, it gives them no reason to think I'm mad at you so I will drink or you keep nagging so I drink. I totally put the focus on me and it was joyous. Everyone got a kick out of me sitting on the couch with a green face mask too. The whole family actually laughed. I will make an effort to keep this behavior up, because I like it!!!!
The most important activity during the day is taking care of ourselves... the wonderful side effect is that everyone benefits from it. Thanks for sharing.
I always found that my life was to be done according to what the alcoholic wanted and not necessarily what I wanted. After high school I was to go to university because that's what the alcoholic wanted. How was I going to pay for this? Not my parents' problem. Immediately after I was to get a job, because I was expected to pay rent in the family home. That's what he wanted. That's the way life was and it was meant to suck. I was not given any time to truly sit back, discover myself and see what I wanted!
I finally decided to take the bull by the horns and do things for myself. I now live the life the I am meant to live and I am happier than I ever was as a kid.
Not to be so hard on myself as I am the one who ultimately made the decisions I made, It's a part of my life I am still paying for and will for a loooooong time but it allowed me to see how selfish and destructive this disease can be.
Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
