The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Your counselor is spot on. Your awareness and actions will be helpful for both you and your son along with face to face meetings/finding a sponsor. For me, one on one counseling was great in addition to al anon. It is ok to have a date in your head and when that date comes you can choose to choose another date! hugs
-- Edited by PP on Tuesday 7th of May 2013 01:01:22 PM
I have been going to a Counciler (for me!) he is wonderful. He's like my face to face and I intend on bringing my son. I'm trying to learn how to parent better being married to active ah. And also my son has strong addiction running on both sides of his biological parents and I want him to have help learning to have coping tools before he turns to alcohol etc. As a mom I need help with this.
He did tell me yesterday that as long as ah doesn't choose recovery. My marriage will continue to be a roller coaster and I will have no control over that. The addiction controls a lot of this. My ah is an awesome dad when drinking because its what keeps me with him, he thinks he has alcohol under control because he's not falling down drunk every night. But really he's just killing himself slowly. He only has benders on wkends.
Its hard to love and hate someone at the same time but it is what it is. I'm trying to take the positives and detach when I need to. I'm looking at a date (in my head) and am wondering if I won't be drawing a line !
Either way my son and I will need coping tools either way
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..."expecting the world to treat you fairly because your a good person, is like expecting a bull to not attack you because your a vegetarian "
I like individual counseling it can be very positive. You have the right to live the best possible life for you .. with your A or without your A .. remember this is YOUR life no one else's .. I like the 3 P's .. when I am in crisis mode .. I can Pause, Pray, Proceed .. whatever I need to do is what is best for me.
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
I found counseling to be very very helpful to me when my then AB drank. (He's been clean and sober for 4 years...yes the program DOES work.) I learned that I didn't cause my brother to start drinking, I can't control him and I couldnt cure him at the time. I learned that I shouldn't feel any guilt over why he drank. I learned to make "I" statements saying I feel angry when...whatever that may be that made you angry. I learned its okay to express how you feel just don't keep it bottled up inside you. I hope that that helps you some...
...."He did tell me yesterday that as long as ah doesn't choose recovery. My marriage will continue to be a roller coaster and I will have no control over that. The addiction controls a lot of this."
Alcoholism is a progressive disease that only gets worse unless they totally stop drinking.
