The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Alanon suggest that we make no major life changes until we are in program for at least 6 months The reason for this suggestion is so
we can have time to regain our self respect, learn how to focus on ourselves and feel safe enough to make healthy decisions.
I know I decided "ENOUGH" when The pain of stayingout weighed the FEAR of leaving. It was the right action to take at that time, it saved my sanity and in the long run my marriage
Keep attending meetings, sharing and you will know.
-- Edited by hotrod on Sunday 28th of April 2013 08:20:44 PM
do we wake up and then decide to take back our self respect?
I do pretty well most of the time but today has been frustrating and I feel like my energy is drained.
Dealing with my AH in any way does not work. I can say hello and it is wrong. If I am kind if I am confrontive if I am compassionate or whatever it does not work.
I come home to him having phone sex w online partners and he thinks it is okay. Lots of other things like him accusing me of not accepting him and not helping him much, blah blah,blah.
So I tend to go to meetings and visit people I know who will build me up and help me stay focused and on the right path.
That helps but at what point do you just stop the nonesense and do what ya gotta do for you.
Actually the answer to that is anytime you believe is the time. Hedging makes the pain last longer. What I did and still do is prepare myself for the consequences of my choices. When I do that than I do expectations and acceptance work along with setting recovery goals. Listen to others share on their experiences with the same thing and learn the journey. This program works when you work it. In support ((((hugs)))))
