The material presented
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I have a 4 month old baby and my husband smokes weed. He stopped until she was a couple months old and now its everyday again. I have tried to talk to him but it seems not to matter. The problem is apparently he has smoked since high school. I dont want my daughter at risk for something to happen while in his care so im given him 2 options, stop or leave....does this ever work?
Renea, I'm sure it's different with different people. I just told my AH if he didn't go to rehab I was going to do whatever I had to do to get him out of my life. He agreed to rehab. I also told him if he didn't attend an NA meeting every single day after rehab, then I was gone too. Because I'm really over it. And it took me a long time to get here. He's waiting on a bed in rehab so we'll see how it goes - but I'm not gonna hold my breath.....he's been to rehab before......
Please realize that weed IS an addiction and the disease only gets worse if it's not treated. And it's a NIGHTMARE to live in.
I learned over the years not to give ultimatums unless I was ready to follow through with the consequences, because an addict knows intuitively when we are wavering. They are skilled at manipulating. Even is he goes into rehab it does not mean he will recover and I did not get that until the second time my husband went into rehab. The first time he went to get me off of his back (he "looked" as if he was in recovery) and the second time he went for himself and did the recovery work. What I didn't get was that I needed recovery, too. My guidance for you would be to find an al anon and/or Nar anon groups to give you an opportunity to become healthier and obtain the support you need to make great choices for you and your family. Keep coming back to us here on this forum and check out the online meetings that occur here every day. hugs....
What caught my eye about your post is that he is smoking and, I assume, he is exhaling? Into the air your baby breathes? I put a stop to my AH smoking anything in the house. He could smoke outside. I refused to go in his car because the smell would get into my clothes. He eventually quit smoking (but not drinking for another 20 years).
Take care of yourself and the baby. Get to AlAnon or NarAnon for support for yourself.
My brother in law smokes weed in the house and swear to my sister that he blows it out the basement windows, UGH! She's asked him to move out by the end of May. I agree with the others, get to Al Anon for YOU. Also, a great book to read is "Getting them Sober" by Toby Rice Drews. I have read it a few times and I always learn from it.
