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Hi guys, quick question. I have been with my sponsor for about 9 months now. I'm slowly working step 4 right now. I constantly have a hard time reaching her. I know she has a lot of people she sponsors(probably around 10, at least) and I know her time is limited but I find that I can go weeks without getting a hold of her. I usually try at least once a week to set up at least a phone call, but sometimes we can't even do that.
How often do you all talk to your sponsors or get together with them? I don't want to hound her daily or anything and I do have other friends in program, but I feel stuck sometimes when I have to wait for her to respond to me which can sometimes take 3-4 days. Is this normal? Do I actually have to be more aggressive? And, if so, how do I do that without being annoying? Thanks!
I too Struggled with this with Mine, Her Work Hours & my Available hours just didn't work! I Stressed on it for along time, and then FINALLY sat down with her, and just told her that I wanted her to be apart of my Recovery, but I really had to find someone that was a little more available to my schedule... I wasn't rude or anything and we are still Wonderful Friends in the Program, but I had to reach out to someone that was more available...
For Me I had to Know when Most of my time was available & Find a Good Match not only for My Program and where I was at, but also that didn't have as many sponsee's... and could give me the time I Deserved... Its OK to Change, or Switch just be honest about why & any good Sponser will Honor & Respect your Wishes and hold no grudges...
I Couldn't take care of me if the Help wasn't available... I Don't Blame her we just was in two differant Places in our lives, and she does Help me when she can... And I Still contact her when I Can't get to my other... Do what Makes you Happy, & Take Care of you...
Hope I was Helpful...Please take what you like & Leave the Rest...
I still speak with my sponsor weekly and she always returns my calls within the same day. It is also helpful to have phone numbers of others in recovery in case your sponsor is unable to get with you. I hope this helps.
I'm in limbo land myself with a sponsor. Very wise woman, in the program for years. Also has an alcoholic daughter. When I run into her at the meetings, she always has time for me. Never is around to get my call and days can go by before she responds. She also has at least 8 or more sponsees and I cant see where having that many is good for anyone. I'm looking around for another.
I have an agreement with my sponsor to touch base weekly at a set time - same time and day every week.
On rare occasions one of us might not be available for the phone call - and if that happens, we're sure to let each other know.
She's also willing to talk to me on those "emergency" days - she understands life doesn't happen on schedule. If I call her and get her voice mail, I make sure to leave her a message and not just hang up - and I let her know if it's really important or if I'm just calling to chit-chat or vent. She always makes an effort to get back in touch with me as soon as she's able.
I have been in the program for many, many years and see my sponsor once a week and talk when necessary.
I have many sponsees. I have one sponsee who only calls in crisis but I did talk to her daily for over a year I talk to my new sponsees daily , some 3xs a week, some once a week I see each at a meeting each week. I believe it is important to maintain connections until we walk through the 12 Steps at least once.
My early sponsor told me to "find and use whatever is necessary to gain and maintain my serenity". That included other sponsors if necessary which is what I did and wallah!! not perfect but a damn sight better than when I was standing around being needy and wondering what in the world do I do now. I had to save my life and my sponsor wasn't going to stand in the way of that so I got the "permissions" as the one above. I'm grateful beyond words. ((((hugs))))